The Things That We Lost

by Jyoti Patel

*** WINNER OF THE 2021 #MERKY BOOKS NEW WRITERS' PRIZE***

Nik has lots of questions about his late father but knows better than to ask his mother, Avani. It's their unspoken rule.

When his grandfather dies, Nik has the opportunity to learn about the man he never met. Armed with a key and new knowledge about his parents' past, Nik sets out to unlock the secrets that his mother has been holding onto his whole life.

As the carefully crafted portrait Avani has painted for her son begins to crack, and painful truths emerge, can the two of them find their way back to each other?

The Things That We Lost is a beautifully tender exploration of family, loss and the lengths to which we go to protect the ones we love.

Genres: Fiction, Contemporary, Literary Fiction, India, Grief

384 pages, Hardcover

First published January 12, 2023

About the author

Jyoti Patel is a London-based author. She is a graduate of the University of East Anglia's Prose Fiction MA and winner of the 2021 #Merky Books New Writers' Prize. She was named as one of The Observer's Top 10 debut novelists for 2023. Her writing has previously been published as part of We Present's 'Literally' series and in the anthology for the 2022 Bristol Short Story Prize, for which she was shortlisted. 'The Things That We Lost' is her debut novel.

Reviews

[Kate O'Shea · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars

At first, as I neared the end of this book I was getting irritated that there wouldn't be enough time for the follow up story of Nik and Avani. However as I finished I realised that actually, the story itself is an explanation.

Sorry for starting at the end but the book itself sort of starts with an end. The Things We Lost tells the story of Avani, her son Nik, her husband Elliot and their families.

Nik, moving to university following the death of his beloved grandfather, is desperate to know more about the father who died before his birth. On the afternoon of his grandfather's death he tells Nik that only Chand, his uncle, would be able to give him the story. Nik knows his mother never talks about his dad but he does not know why. Even the basics of how his dad died are confusing.

This novel is not an easy read in that it deals with some weighty subjects - death, racism and child abuse to name a few. However it is sensitively written. Nothing is rammed down your throat or put there to shock or disgust - they are simply there, as they are in life.

The reason I knocked off the half point is because the slang used by the teenagers really made my toes curl. I actually had to look some of it up. (My stepson is 33 now so it's been a while since I've had to decipher "teen speak".

Apart from this I really enjoyed this book and zipped through it in a couple of days. I'd definitely recommend it and look for more work by Jyoti Patel.

I received this ARC from Netgalley for free and am leaving this review voluntarily. The Things We Lost is pit in the UK on Jan 12 2023.

[Roman Clodia · Rating 3 out of 5]

She felt like a fraud, being eighteen and having never visited the place [India] that so much of her identity was attributed to.

The thing that really stood out for me in this book is Patel's representation of second - and third generation 'immigrant' families and mixed-race relationships in contemporary London; something that we haven't really seen enough of in literature given the prevalence of people in London (the setting of this book) with our vast array of varied inheritances and the mixing pot of our friendship groups from school onwards.

I also think that there is a lovely warmth in some of the family scenes and the way that relationships have been conceived. Sadly, for me the execution feels a bit bland and clunky. There are time switches that disrupt the storyline, characters feel rather one-dimensional and the writing doesn't flow. There's no distinctive voice or style, something which is important to me as a reader. And the book feels overlong for the material it contains.

Thanks to the publisher for an ARC via NetGalley

[Reading_ Tamishly · Rating 2 out of 5]

Authors, it’s okay not to write a 300plus paged books. Just tell the story. It took forever to tell the story and it didn’t keep me interested as the blurb.

[Barbara · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was beautiful but felt way too long for the relatively little that happened. I loved Avani and Nik, mother and son, each with their own deeply felt problems which were different but connected. Avani had married outside her family's religion and against her mother's wishes. Her father dies at the start of the book and seems to have been a wonderful man. She was widowed very young and without realising she was pregnant. Son Nik, has spent his life wondering about who his father had been and why his mother won't talk about him.

There are great themes of loss and bereavement, light touches on racism and the differences between multi-cultural London and whichever northern town Nik chooses to study in. There's an examination of the challenges of holding onto your friends when your lives start to diverge - and that's for both mother and son.

An old BMW forms the eye of an emotional hurricane with Nik unable to understand why his mother is so determined that he should sell it.

With great characters, a gentle mystery about the past, and a supporting cast of friends and lovers, there's a lot to like about this book. I just couldn't help feeling it would have been 50% better with a large chunk of the inaction edited out.

[Ritu Bhathal · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nik is reeling from the loss of his grandfather, as is his mother, but the hole he has left in Nik's life is trying to be filled with memories and information that he doesn't have.
Avani, his mum, is keeping something big from him, and he doesn't know how to get to the bottom of it, to help him heal his own grief.
Dealing with huge issues such as racism, mixed-race relationships, and grieving, this story is told in a beautiful manner.
I'm not Gujrati but understood many of the phrases used in the book, and felt an extra link with my parents both being from Kenya and moving here, too.
Many thanks to Penguin Random House UK for an ARC in exchange for an honest opinion.

[Rachel Matthews · Rating 4 out of 5]

In The Things That We Lost, Jyoti Patel has given us two fully realised characters in Nik and Avani. Neither mother, Avani, nor son, Nik, are without flaws and both are dealing in their own ways with the grief of losing Elliott, their husband and father respectively. They ultimately need each other but are too busy shutting each other out to see this. For this reason, I loved the grandfather character who worked so hard to get Avani and Nik to open up, make peace and honour the memory of Elliott.

There are a few family secrets revealed as the book goes on but this is not done in a gratuitous or gimmicky way. Instead, long buried truths and feelings are organically and gradually unearthed as we read from Avani's and Nik's points of view across several decades. Chand, the brother/uncle character could have been better developed but, given, he is often absent, particularly in the modern day timelines, it is understandable that we don't get as much time with him as we do some of the other characters.

I really enjoyed the way romance was dealt with in this novel. Avani and Nik both have interactions in the book which could be described as romantic but these never read as cheesy or saccharine to me. I have a very low tolerance for cringe so was grateful for the subtle way Patel included these relationships without them overshadowing other elements of the story.

Overall, I found this to be an enjoyable, evenly-paced novel with interesting characters exploring a diverse range of issues. This is a book you should curl up with on an evening, a mug of hot (insert beverage of choice) in your hand and just let yourself be carried away by this touching and beautiful story.

Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for early access to this impressive debut novel.

[minaal.reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

✨There are some books that are just meant for you. And this was one of those novels for me.✨

When I first sat down to read this over the December holiday period, I met Nik, one of the main characters. He was visiting his grandad in Northwick Park hospital as he had just had a stroke. He took him Indian food and tea.

Many years ago, my grandad spent months in Northwick Park too. We also took him Indian food and tea.

Then, Nik's grandad died.

The day I read that part was the day of my grandad's funeral.

While the similarities between our experiences end there, my feelings towards this novel only grew deeper. Jyoti Patel has beautifully captured the impact that those who are no longer with us leave behind. She has thought of it all. The inner conflicts, the misunderstandings, the things that are said because the things we want to say go unsaid. The grief that is carried alone because misguidedly, we think it will be a burden to share with others.

While the novel centres itself around grief; the way it consumes us fully on some days and holds us back lightly on others, there were other themes that Jyoti covered too. And honestly? I wish I had read this with someone as I want to discuss it all. From losing a parent to the impact of going against the grain and not following family and cultural expectations, from exploring mental health, extreme sadness and possibly depression and the so very common, 'we don't talk about uncomfortable things in Gujarati households but here is some tea and nasto anyway'.

Jyoti Patel has written a book that is so worthy of the Merky Books New Writers Prize.

While beautiful lines were scattered throughout, I'll leave you with my favourite:
'In his nativity, he assumed that bereavement was simply an absence. Now, it dawns on him that it is an inescapable presence.'

✨

[Bob Hughes · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novel is a quietly powerful story about a mother and son, and the secrets they keep from each other.

Although that sounds like a fairly familiar premise for a family drama, there is a quiet haunting quality to the book- Avani especially appears beaten down by everything she is attempting to carry at once, and I found her a fascinating character, full of complexity, warmth and fear.

The perilous balance of Avani and Nik's relationship was wonderfully drawn- as a reader, I was always aware that any moment this balance could tilt in the second it took to say the wrong thing.

It is a rich family story that I think will stay with readers.

I received an advanced copy of this book from the publisher and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Harvinder Kooner · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the book and seeing the Avanis journey from childhood to adulthood however I thought more would have come out in the end. Would be good to have a sequel to see how characters develop as I feel like the ending hasn’t really ended for me..

[Jess Dunne]

Really touching multigenerational family saga, about the impact of grief.

One of the characters in the novel made an observation along the lines of things tend to come out when someone dies (I’m butchering the author’s lovely prose with my poor memory, sorry!). There were several secrets that were hinted at and revealed throughout the book which kept me enthralled. It was quite a page turner - unusual for me and this genre.

I particularly loved Nik, he felt so real - I just wanted to give the poor lad a cuddle.

Pick up this book if: you enjoy tension, difficult family relationships and real, multifaceted characters.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for an ARC in exchange for my honest review.

[Rajasree Variyar · Rating 5 out of 5]

This novel is a deftly woven tapestry of complex characters and relationships, propelled along by the quest to uncover family secrets.

And it is a thought-provoking exploration of the nature and importance of identity for British Asians across generations.

The writing is gorgeous, finely layered, evocative, and sweeps the reader away. This is a novel everyone should read!
A brilliant debut.

[Annie Leadley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a truly wonderful Book which covers so many of the issues that still exists in our society today within Families of varying Cultures . I would give this Book more than 5*'s if I could.
It is beautifully & very sensitively written , touching on the complexities of Love for friends & family, of Grief, Depression, Acceptance for who we are no matter what our background is . This Book will make you laugh & cry & also even question things in the complexities of your own life .#NetGalley, #Goodreads, #FB, #Instagram, #Amazon.co.uk, # , #, #.

[sameera · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Things That We Lost by Jyoti Patel is a poignantly rendered novel of family, loss and secrets, and the depths we go to protect those we love— and ourselves. Overcome by the recent death of his beloved grandfather, Nik turns to question the mystery surrounding the unexpected death of his late father, Elliot, who passed away before he was born. So begins a gentle unravelling of the layers of family history and painful secrets carefully masked by Nik’s mother, Avani, piece by piece, until both mother and son reach a tense precipice that threatens to fracture their entire relationship.

With absorbing prose flowing across every page, each character and their inner vulnerabilities are beautifully and sensitively composed, and the author draws a very realistic and intimate portrait of the complexities of depression, trauma and the nuances of a full spectrum of emotions. The more I reflect on it, I realise it is in every sense a book that feels like coming home— from the familiar Gujarati language interspersed throughout, to the characters’ rootedness in their home city of London and the natural way in which family and parent-child dynamics are explored. The ending is a delicate balance of foreshadowing the possibility of closure for Avani and Nik without downplaying the tenderness of the losses that will be a lasting part of their lives.

Overall, The Things That We Lost is a discreetly powerful novel, and so deeply honest in its depiction of longing and hope and bereavement that at times the emotions it inspires whilst reading are so unexpectedly overwhelming and visceral. Thank you Merky Books for my proof copy, and to Jyoti Patel for writing this, it is genuinely one of the most comforting and moving novels I’ve read in a while.

[AmyAmyAmy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautifully written debut novel.

Strong and interesting lead characters.

[Mary Pimbblet · Rating 2 out of 5]

I just didn't find this relatable at all.
I didn't understand why Nik would have waited until he was eighteen to start asking things about his dad, or why people hadn't given him more details earlier. While at the end his mother's reasons for not revealing how she felt, or the full truth behind what she felt had happened, that didn't explain why his grandfather or uncles wouldn't have talked to him about his father.
The whole book is really London centric, apparently multiculturalism is completely limited to London, and everyone outside the capital is a racist. I really found it irritating, the idea that any university in the UK wouldn't have diversity in the people attending and working there, even if the town surrounding it might be predominantly white.
I did like the idea of exploring the mixture of races and cultures, and the impact of that on children, but by removing half of Nik's background it was difficult to remember what his background was supposed to be, or if it made any real difference to him.
This really just didn't come together for me, neither the story or the characters felt real or relatable.

[Gumble's Yard - Golden Reviewer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Chand had called him a coconut when he was thirteen – just about brown on the outside but so disappointingly white within. Nik hadn’t known how to respond. He’s Indian in the only way he knows – in his ability to speak Gujarati, badly, in his love of the stories from the Mahabharata that his grandfather recited to him on their walks home from school, his addiction to jalebi and rasmalai, or in the box he ticks when he has to fill in a form: Mixed – White + Asian, like some reductive equation.

This book was featured in the 2023 version of the influential annual Observer Best Debut Novelist feature (past years have included Natasha Brown, Caleb Azumah Nelson, Douglas Stuart, Sally Rooney, Rebecca Watson, Yara Rodrigues Fowler, JR Thorp Bonnie Garmus, Gail Honeyman among many others).

It was winner of the 2021 Merky Books New Writers Prize – Merky Books is a PRH imprint set up with Stormzy with a worthy aim to publish “bold voices from untraditional spaces that are inclusive and intersectional .. [and] .. to break down barriers in the publishing industry”. As an aside one of its very best publications was Derek Owusu’s brilliant Desmond Elliott winning “That Reminds Me”. The New Writers Prize is a key part of their strategy – aimed at “unpublished and under-represented writers aged 16-30 from the UK and the Republic of Ireland” and Patel, a UEA Creative Writing Graduate born in Paris and who grew up in NW London with Indian parents, won from some 2000 entries with an extract from what went on to be this novel.

This book is at heart an exploration of two things – grief and growing up in a multicultural family.

The novel has two main protagonists – Nik(hu) and his mum Avani, and is partly set in the second half of 2017 as Nik prepares for his first term at University (studying History at an unnamed Northern seaside University) and part across Avani’s earlier life. The Prologue has her at University in 1990 studying Mathematics and also introduces us to her then boyfriend and future father of Nik – Elliott – from a poor and abusive white family and her older brother Chand.

Other crucial sections are set in 1998 when in less than 2 months Avani loses her strict mother (with who she has a very difficult relationship only partly mediated by her beloved Dad) and before that Elliott in some form of (for much of the book) unspecified incident.

Elliott’s death – at a time when she was unknowingly pregnant with Nik- locks Avani into a world of private grief which she is never willing to allow Nik to enter so his knowledge of his father is largely from third parties and his information on his death even sketchier.

The post prologue open chapter has Nik visiting his dying grandfather (Avani’s father) in hospital before his death – his grandfather gives him a key to something that he has kept for Nik for years, but is reluctant to discuss Elliott, suggesting instead Nik speaks to Chand.

The rest of the book really examines the impact of this latest death (and the two in 1998) on Avani and Nik, the latter in particular really struggling at University, partly from the unfamiliar monocultural society he finds there and partly due to mental illness struggles. Meanwhile Avani is forced to revisit her suppressed guilt around the circumstances of Elliott’s death and her new found isolation without either father nearby or son living with her. And neither is helped (and nor is their suddenly fragile relationship) by the reappearance on the scene of his stepfather Paul (the true reason for whose break up with his mother is another of the family secrets kept from Nik) and by a newly assertive stand-in family patriarch Chand (who has always had a difficult relationship with both).

Overall I found the book a fairly conventional family drama – with a relatively limited plot and gently unspooling understanding of past events. Although I did – as often with point of view novels – feel that the author was artificially holding back things from us that Avani would naturally remember until such time as, in the novel, they became clear to Nik. The movements between time periods are easy to follow as each chapter is signposted with its date – and there are also heavy musical references to anchor each period – but perhaps can feel a little disjointed.

My favourite parts of the novel included the dialogue which, particularly in the sections featuring Nik, is a lively mix of London street slang and untranslated Gujurati. I also liked the portrayal of male mental illness struggles – both in the life of Nik but also his father. There was also a side-plot involving a relative of Elliott that, while I wavered over its plausibility, was well handled.

On the weakness side I found the book disappointingly London centric – as already mentioned the University Nik attends is not even named, whereas in London individual streets are name checked. And the characterisation of the town and its inhabitants seems stereotyped. If this book had a map at its front – it would have London featured in A-Z level detail with the rest of England shown as an unknown blank marked “Here There Be Racists”

I also felt that a number of the characters were portrayed with almost no redeeming features – including Avani’s racist mother, the feckless philandering Paul (a South London living, Arsenal-following Actuary – so to be fair two redeeming features) and a racist student house-mate of Nik (as an aside could a University student in 2017 really scratch racist comments on a fellow student’s car without any repercussions?).

Finally though I would say that the author really lands the ending – which manages to avoid dramatic revelations or overly saccharine resolution, but still finished on a memorable and hopeful note.

My thanks to Merky Books, Random House Cornerstone for an ARC via NetGalley

[Jo The Black Bookworm · Rating 5 out of 5]

"The wide expanse of life was waiting for them, yet unwritten, and so gloriously full of possibility."

I'm unsure whether I am lacking in the ability to process my own grief, as to why I lapped this gorgeous novel up, or whether I just love reading about the intricacies of grief. Either way this book had me all the way in my feelings from start to finish.

"The Things That We Have Lost" follows the lives of mother & son, Avani & Nikhil. Following the devastating loss of their beloved Dad/Grandad, secrets from Avani's past stirs up a desire within Nikhil to learn more about his deceased father, much to Avani's dismay. The story is told  over the course of the 80s, early 90s & the present day. The reader is taken through the whirlwind of Avani's teenage years, her marriage, the untimely death of her husband, her grief & the loss of her father. Avani's story is beautifully interwoven with Nikhil's story which is essentially a coming of age story; The difficulties of navigating race, belonging, grief, mental health & relationships.

Have you ever felt compelled to hug the pages of your book whilst reading? Well this was me whilst reading Nikhil's pain. He was so lost & so hurt throughout this story. What I found even more heartbreaking, asides from his grief and breakdown of his mental health, was that the source of his pain stemmed from his mothers inability to manage & navigate her own grief.

I really love books that encourage me to reflect on my own experiences. Grief is something that I personally do not deal well with, and it was comforting to feel seen within the confines of Avani's character. Grief is something that we expect, but very rarely know, nor understand how to navigate. Patel explores this concept so beautifully in this stunning debut.

Definitely one to check out if it is not on your list yet. One for lovers of "Someday, Maybe".

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

[Selina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Was so glad to have been given the chance to read this book, what an amazing story of love and loss. Trying to find out what happened to the dad he never had the chance to meet, while going away to start uni and get over the death of his grandad. Nik has a lot on his plate his mum is not able to open up and help Nik to find the answers he is looking for, who can help Nik find the answers to the many questions he has.

[Prava Chak · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was captivating and engrossing from the first page and I devoured it quickly while relating to the characters and their lives. Wanted more after the last page, so am reading it again, but slowing the journey and savoring the writing!

[Ellie · Rating 4 out of 5]

★★★★☆

This was a really sweet but realistic exploration of grief, identity and belonging. Following Nik and Avani as they mourn the loss of their grandfather and father respectively, it brings up old wounds of Adani's husband and Nik's father's death years prior.

This is easy to read in terms of language and flow, but deals with difficult topics in a realistic way. I also thought that the interwoven reflections on culture, identity and belonging, particularly with Nik at university and Avani's relationship with her mother, were really well-done and eye opening.

cw// death, mentions of anxiety and depression, racism, micro-aggressions

[Angela Sanchez · Rating 4 out of 5]

4,5
para ser un libro que me he leído para literaturas poscoloniales me ha gustado bastante y me lo habría leído por gusto. bastante interesante y me ha tenido enganchadísima

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.75 stars. I thoroughly enjoyed the beautiful writing in this book, and I became so invested in the characters and story. I loved the description of food, art and raw emotion. I can't wait to read more from Jyoti Patel. 

[Belén LuSa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best book for me this year. I judged, I thought I was understanding, I got to the darker feelings they were hiding, and finally released the tension in the last three pages. This is the definition of an amazing book.
Great great book!!!

[Helen Precious · Rating 4 out of 5]

The things that we lost is a beautiful book, exploring how individuals choose to protect themselves from emotional pain in all it's rawness with the necessity to face reality in it's singular newness. A story of grief, growth and acceptance.

With the death of his grandfather Nik is lead down a path into the past as secrets relating to his father's death are revealed and the unspoken is forced to be heard. Patel's story focuses on pivotal moments in Nik's life exacerbated by his transition into adulthood as he takes his place at university. The palpable mental tension is expressed in the strangeness of his new predicament: emotional unmoored from any familial male role model, culturally isolated in a predominantly white northern town and physically distanced from his friends support, Nik is left to puzzle out where he belongs and what price knowing the truth is worth paying.

[Karen Cole · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Things That We Lost is Jyoti Patel's debut novel and was the winner of the #Merky Books New Writers' Prize 2021 and is a perceptive, thought-provoking exploration of growing up as a person of colour in Britain – both in the present day and a few decades ago. Jyoti Patel also movingly examines universal themes which will be familiar to anybody who has experienced loss, especially of the sudden kind.
The third-person narrative follows Avani and her teenage son, Nikhil and by alternating the perspective, a rather poignant picture emerges of two people torn apart by their words and actions. The prologue introduces a younger Avani, full of love and optimism and even though there are nods towards both the personal and societal issues which will feature throughout the book, these first pages are imbued with possibility. It means the impact of the tragedy which led to Avani losing the love of her life and Nik growing up without his father feels even more devastating.
However, it's another death which proves to be the catalyst for the shifting of the dynamics between mother and son. Even though the death of Nik's grandfather isn't entirely unexpected, the gap he leaves is profound and I thought the recognition of the way bereavement changes everything was considered with such insight. Events in the present day take place over just a few months and there are fascinating lines drawn between the more recent upheaval and that which occurred long ago
Throughout the book there are passages set in Avani's past and there are some scenes here which are particularly emotive. There is never any doubt as to the enduring bond which formed between Avani and Elliott but Jyoti Patel never flinches from portraying the worst of humanity too. The older Avani can be a frustrating character at times but these flashback passages ensure her sense of loss and what it meant for her relationship with others is described with such empathy.
Likewise, the development of Nik's character is handled with real insight and I thought it was especially powerful to feature a young man experiencing mental health issues. As with Avani, he is allowed to be a flawed, complex character and the spiralling of his emotions is painful to read about. His reaction to the loss of his beloved grandfather, followed by the sort of life changes which might be expected at his age but which can result in a fracturing of a protective, supportive framework, is so completely believable.
While families and friendships are universal themes explored in The Things That We Lost, this is also a candid look at growing up surrounded by prejudice and racism. There are scenes which I'm sure will be familiar to many Black and Brown British people reading the book. The inevitable question about where a person is really from is particularly resonant in a novel which has belonging as a core theme. The prose is utterly captivating throughout; liberally peppered with Gujarati words and phrases and urban slang, there's a rather beautiful lyricism to the writing, superbly capturing the diversity of speech in modern-day Britain.
The revelations don't come as a surprise and not every loose end is neatly tied up but that further underlines Jyoti Patel's commitment to truly reflect the complexities of grief, regret, love and hope. Sometimes wryly witty, often upsetting and always honest, The Things That We Lost is an outstanding debut and a book which will stay with me, I highly recommend it.

[Ajit · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received the arc through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book touches on a number of interesting themes, and is at times incredibly compelling in trying to unravel the mystery of the grief surrounding Elliot's death. However, the book gets bogged down in parts and the pacing, especially, with the jumps in time doesn't flow consistently. The themes brought up are highly relevant and addressed in a very authentic and believable way, however, the book doesn't do enough to reach any kind of satisfying resolution with too much left hanging. The characters as well don't really have clear development or arcs, but rather seem to exist as they are.

I think for a first novel this is incredibly promising and I look forward to see what Jyoti Patel produces in the future.

[Joy Lenton · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a daring debut with a wide scope of themes bravely depicted within. Here you will encounter grief and loss, relationships, family friction and enduring love as the narrative alternates between the present day and the past.

With a deft and delicate touch, issues of racism, prejudice, culture clashes, secrets and sacrifices are shared through the history and stories of Avani, her parents, her husband, Elliot, and their son, Nik.

When Nik leaves for university in the North of England, shortly following his grandfather’s decline and death, he is blissfully unaware of his differences and how he will be perceived by others.

This precipitates a prolonged season of depression for Nik and his mother. She had already buried, rather than embraced, her grief at losing her husband, Elliot, years ago and now mourns her father as well.

Avani and Nik’s relationship is very believable, although I did feel a bit irritated with Avani sometimes for failing to open up to him and provide the answers about his father that he so desperately needed. In her maternal protectiveness, she didn’t seem to notice how grown up he actually was.

The dramatic closing scenes are moving and might pave the way for a sequel. A beautifully written, enlightening, intriguing, slow paced read that allows for great characterisation to take place. But it also made for a sluggish plotline at times.

[Bookshortie · Rating 4 out of 5]

When Nik’s grandfather dies a chain of events begin that change the life of his grandson Nik and Nik’s relationship with his mother Avani forever. Family secrets and long hidden memories are uncovered. Nik’s father Elliott died before he was born. Will Nik finally learn who his father was and what happened to him all those years ago?

This was a really interesting read and one I was looking forward too. It’s the death of Nik’s grandfather that is the catalyst for opening a can of worms and revealing family secrets that have never been revealed before. Nik knows very little about his father other than that he died in a car accident but his mother has never gone into great detail about what happened, how he died or who he was as a person. However Nik’s grandfather was keeping secrets of his own which then leads to Nik asking questions that his mother would prefer he didn’t ask.

The story is told from two perspectives: Avani and Nik through a dual timeline. In the past we meet a young Avani and are given an insight into Avani’s relationship with her own mother and how she met Elliott. In the present Nik is trying to uncover the truth about his family but also live his own life.

There are many themes in this book. The theme of identity comes through very clearly from Nik’s perspective as a person born of mixed heritage. Following his grandfather’s death it was quite a culture shock for Nik to see how people mourn within the Gujarati community. When he goes to India with Avani to scatter his grandfather’s ashes he can’t connect with India and doesn’t feel like he fits in but when he is home he faces questions about where he is really from. The subject of racism is also present in the story and appears in lots of different ways from the racism faced by Avani and her brother Chand when they were growing up to the racism that Nik faces in the present. Colourism is also portrayed in the story and it’s something that is still present in the Indian community today. Growing up Avani’s mother would make comments about Avani’s complexion and even would go as far as leaving skin lightening cream outside her bedroom door. By the time I reached the end of Chapter 14 my heart truly broke for Avani and I was really upset to read what she’d been through that I became quite emotional. It was clear from these scenes that Avani’s relationship with her mother was non-existent but that her mother was also very cruel. The way Avani was treated was witnessed by her father and brother but they felt helpless to intervene. But at the same time it made sense as to why Avani was so close to her father. Avani’s father was very forward thinking, respecting her thoughts and feelings whereas as her mother wasn’t.

I definitely connected with this book and with the characters due to my Gujarati heritage. I recognised a lot of Gujarati traditions, words and phrases which are so familiar to me and it was so refreshing seeing them written in a book.

A story about relationships and family secrets!

[Nic · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Things That We Lost by Jyoti Patel in an incredible debut. Picked as an Observer debut of 2023, following in the shoes of great books like Shuggie Bain and Lessons in Chemistry.

When Nik’s grandfather dies shortly before he goes to University, he tells Nik to go to house and find a key. Nik has no idea what the key might open and suffice to say it raises high emotions and a lot of questions. The funeral sees Nik and his mother going back to India a land which should be so dear to him, but which he barely knows.

Told across 2 timelines, we unravel Avani’s marriage to Elliott and her subsequent relationship to Paul. The relationships pivot around Nik but he has little idea as to what went on in his early life.

This is beautifully told and compelling reading. Touching on clashing cultures and generations, it’s a cracking debut and one that will have you up late turning the pages.

Thanks to Netgalley and the Publisher for an ARC.

[Helen Peachey · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent debut novel. The writing is vivid and engaging. The storyline exploring the many ways that loss can manifest itself in complex family relationships is handled with care and empathy. All of the characters are totally believable and easy to identify with. This book will stay with me long after I have finished reading it.