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210 pages, Print on Demand (Paperback)
First published January 1, 2007
My mother's first depressive illness occurred when I was seven years old, and I felt it was my fault. I felt I should have prevented it. This was about a year before my father left us.And so, along with the title, we are left in no doubt that we are about to read a story about depression, suicide, dysfunctional families & relationships and other mental illnesses.
Walt and I could get angry at each other in seconds. It alarmed others. It worried Agnes, my wife, to whom I was still married at the time, when she first saw it happen, that two otherwise civilized men could so quickly become so abusive.At the point the book starts Charlie has been separated from his wife, Agnes, for seven years though he is still in touch with her and his daughter Cassie. Agnes is now married to Leon, a fireman, but Charlie lives alone. Oh, and Charlie is a psychiatrist who specialises in trauma, especially trauma experienced by war veterans. As the book is set in late 1970s New York there are a lot of Vietnam veterans that need help. The story dips into the past frequently and we discover that he met Agnes through her brother Danny, who was one of Charlie's Vietnam patients. Danny rarely talked about what happened in Vietnam but it is hinted that the failure of Charlie's and Agnes's marriage had something to do with Danny's treatment.
I often wondered how it would be to tramp off into the mountains and keep going until I was exhausted, then simply sink into the snow and fall asleep. Then the wolves could have me.
To want to die in the forest and be eaten by wolves: another marker of incipient madness.