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The Plot Against the King #1
The Plot Against the King
A key player in uncovering one of our nation's biggest injustices tells the whole story—for kids!
Kash Patel partners with Beacon of Freedom Publishing House, an imprint of BRAVE Books, to bring a fantastical retelling of Hillary’s horrible plot against Trump to the whole family.
Full of fake heralds and keeper Komey’s spying slugs, this is a story of daring and danger. But never fear! Kash the Distinguished Discoverer will win the day.
Kash Patel partners with Beacon of Freedom Publishing House, an imprint of BRAVE Books, to bring a fantastical retelling of Hillary’s horrible plot against Trump to the whole family.
Full of fake heralds and keeper Komey’s spying slugs, this is a story of daring and danger. But never fear! Kash the Distinguished Discoverer will win the day.
40 pages, Paperback
First published April 1, 2022
11 people are currently reading
160 people want to read
About the author
Kash Patel
5 books67 followersKashyap Pramod "Kash" Patel is an American lawyer and former federal prosecutor serving as the director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation since 2025. He also served as acting director of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives from February to April 2025. (Wikipedia)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 67 reviews
February 20, 2025
20 February 2025
one last update:
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
2 December 2024
WELL IT HAPPENED HERE WE ARE FRIENDS HE'S GONNA DIRECT THE FBI.
God help us all.
Also, holy crap, The Rachel Maddow Show showed that there ARE TWO SEQUELS TO THIS BOOK. HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?
Again, God help us all.
14 November 2024
OHMYGOD IS THIS MAN ACTUALLY GOING TO BE A POWERFUL FIGURE IN THIS NEW TRUMP ADMINISTRATION?!
Sweet baby Jesus and the grown one, too.
Will this review make me a target? LMAO (but also not really).
28 August 2024
I saw two typos in this, now more than two years later. A bit embarrassed, I must admit.
2 June 2022
Amazon wouldn't let me post the bulk of this review because it was "inappropriate." LMAO.
17 May 2022
I have a hard time believing this is real.
25 May 2022
Okay, I bought and read this book so you don't have to.
No, seriously, don't buy this.
Last week, Mehdi Hasan, on his MSNBC on Peacock show, briefly addressed the fact that Kash Patel had written a children's book, The Plot Against the King. I was intrigued.
I first attempted to get the book from my local library system. I use three systems regularly (go Ohio libraries!) and none of the three had a copy of the book. On principle, I was pleased, but as a matter of getting the book in my hands, I was a little frustrated.
So, I bought it from Amazon. I intend to return it as soon as I can, as a matter of principle. (I don't give my money to trolls like Patel; I also don't buy books from Amazon.)
Now, I need it understood that I believe reasonable people can disagree when it comes to politics. I have a bit of a hard time reading biographies of politicians that, to my mind, valorize them beyond the realm of reasonable justification. Politicians are human beings, and even the finest of them have dark moments and mistakes in their past, and that level of nuance can be hard to convey in picture book form. (I have a rant about this related to Shirley Chisholm, who has been the subject of at least four very triumphal, very cursory picture book biographies in the last few years. I haven't really worked out all the details in that rant, and I will choose to spare you all in relating it. But I have a rant rolling around in my brain.)
But this isn't something that "reasonable people" can disagree over. This is political propaganda dressed up as a children's book.
Leni Riefenstahl
This is a stretch, but hear me out.
Documentary filmmaker Leni Riefenstahl is regarded as one of the finest filmmakers of her generation. Her films were Nazi Party propaganda, yet they demonstrated a level of technical expertise such that many film critics and historians are able to separate her films' significance from the fact that they are Nazi propaganda.
Now I don't know that that is the way Riefenstahl's films should be handled. I have never watched them. (I don't really watch movies, period, let alone propaganda from the 1930s.)
But the fact that that conversation happens suggests that Riefenstahl had technical skill worth studying.
THIS is not worth studying. There is no technical proficiency worth admiring. There is no creativity to marvel at. This is nonsense. This is an attempt at child-directed propaganda that valorizes Donald Trump, Devin Nunes, and Kash Patel. It will not be studied in a century by historians seeking to analyze its technical prowess.
If this book still exists in a century it will be seen as a pathetic waste of paper.
So first of all, you have to know who Kash Patel is.
Patel is a Donald Trump loyalist. After earning a JD, he worked for eight years as a federal public defender. He joined the US Department of Justice as a trial attorney in 2014.
In 2017, Patel was appointed senior counsel on counterterrorism at the House Select Committee on Intelligence. At the time, Rep. Devin Nunes (R-CA) was the chair of the committee.
From this vantage point, Patel played a prominent role in promoting the Republican discrediting of the investigations in Donald Trump and Russian interference in the 2016 election. He was the main author of a memo which charged that the FBI was biased against Trump, made public in January 2018. He had a murky role in the Trump-Ukraine scandal.
After the dismissal of Secretary of Defense Mark Esper, he was made chief of staff to Acting Secretary of Defense Christopher Miller.
It was reported after the end of the Trump administration that Trump had seriously contemplated naming him the Deputy Director of the CIA immediately before dismissing then-CIA director Gina Haspel, which would have meant Patel could lead the agency as Acting Director.
All told, Patel can't be said to be a major player in the Trump administration, but he was an unapologetic Trump loyalist. It seems likely Trump considered him useful, but again, he wasn't central.
I almost feel some pity here.
The story is practically incoherent, but the illustration is the result of someone who has a decent amount of talent. And I almost feel pity that she wasted her skills on such a piece of crap. (I know this seems to contradict what I said above, but I mean it! It's very colorful.)
Alright so the book itself.
I will be quoting liberally from the text.
Kash the Distinguished Discoverer
Kash Patel is the main character of the story. His avatar is Kash the Distinguished Discoverer. "Kash was known far and wife as the one person who could discover anything about anything. He found the Holy Grape, deep in the Enchanted Forest, and he discovered who had stolen the sleeping princess."
What is the Holy Grape? If there's some sort of real-world application there, I'll leave it to smarter people than I to figure it out.
The Russionians
The Russionians cheat at jousting tournaments, FYI. Apparently Kash is beloved by the heralds of the kingdom for exposing that!
Humble one, that Kash Patel is.
Oh and we're in the Land of the Free.
Because creativity and subtlety are clearly our strong suits.
Hillary Queenton
"The heralds had been announcing that Hillary Queenton would be queen. She says queenly things like thee and thou and forsooth, and he last name is Queenton, after all."
Queenton. Pardon me for quoting a cliché, but stick a fork in me I'm done.
...but the merchant Donald!
"But when the royal counter-uppers counted up the final votes, they realized the people had dared to choose the merchant Donald! The heralds and Hillary were horrified. Donald didn't care what the heralds said about him, and he was determined to Make the Kingdom Great Again."
Yep. Not MAGA, MKGA. And yes, there is plenty of MKGA paraphernalia.
Oh, and the heralds have signs that say "CNN" and "NYT" and "The Post."
Again, subtlety is not exactly a strength.
Oh, and it's cute that Donald is a "merchant."
A shifty-looking knight and a steel box!
"Then a shifty-looking knight jumped onto the stand. 'Donald isn't the rightful king. Inside this steel box, I have found a paper that says Donald cheated his way to the throne!'"
The avatars here aren't subtle, either. The shifty knight looks like Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA). Donald looks like a young, youthful Trump. Hillary Queenton is on this page, looking like Mr. Burns from The Simpsons. Oh, and the steel box is the Steele dossier.
"'Apparently,' sad the shifty knight, 'Donald made friends with the Russionians while drinking cherry ginger ale in the Swirly Tower Tavern in Russionia, and they helped him cheat!'"
Duke Devin!
Duke Devin is "loyal to the core" (gag). It's not wrong, Devin Nunes was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom for unwavering loyalty to Donald Trump in 2021, alongside fellow Trump sycophant Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH). It is quite possible that their receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom permanently damaged that prize's reputation.
Oh, and those heralds from before? Donald calls them "fake heralds." (Where's our "alternative heralds"?)
Duke Devin and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer set out on The Quest for the Truth about the Plot Against the King. Yes, that is how it is described. And yes, the italics are in the text itself.
Much like Donald Trump's Twitter account, it seems Kash Patel missed the elementary school lessons on what is appropriate usage of capital letters.
I feel like I'm writing a parody. But this is real.
They find slug juice.
Keeper Komey is the keeper of the slugs Duke Devin and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer find a letter from Hillary Queenton, written to Keeper Komey, thanking him for the papers in the steel box.
Scandalous!
Then they go to Russionia to find the Swirly Tower Tavern.
But there IS no such place! And the steel box paper is looking very suspicious! And "Everyone knows King Donald doesn't even drink cherry ginger ale."
Apparently cherry ginger ale is the avatar for the infamous pee tape.
Ew.
So the steel box is a lie and the shifty knight admits he just doesn't like Donald.
Kash goes to tell this info to Donald. Hillary Queenton and Keeper Komey chase him and then fall off the stairs to the tower. (Not going to lie, I fully was convinced that they just killed off those two characters. That seems entirely fitting with this storyline. but no, they aren't killed.)
Kash stood up and addressed everybody. "Everybody! I am Kash, the Great Wizard and the Distinguished Discoverer. I have discovered that the king, King Donald, is innocent! HE did not work with the Russionians, and he did not cheat. You chose him, so he became king, fair and square. Hillary wrote that paper and had her sneaky slugs slide it into the steel box for the shifty knight to find. Now that you know more of the facts, it's time for you to think carefully and decide what you think of the king. Don't just trust the person with the loudest trumpet."
And the people all cheer and they have a party for Donald and Komey and Hillary get banished from the kingdom.
"And so, Duke Devin, King Donald, and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer whent back into the castle to share a nice meal with no cherry ginger ale. With that, the Kingdom was Made Great Again, and from that day on, they lived happily ever after."
That's how our story ends.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
There's a "true story" section, which seems to wildly exaggerate Kash Patel's significance in the story.
Oh, and don't forget to follow Kash Patel on Truth Social @Kash.
OKAY BUT THEN WE GET TO THE VERY END AND IT'S AN ADVERTISEMENT FOR BRAVEBOOKS.COM
Okay, you really gotta go look at BraveBooks.com.
This is a book publishing company that publishes literature that emphasizes culture war politics.
Among the other titles are:
The Fight for Freedom Island by Trent Talbot, a book that teaches about freedom, apparently
Elephants Are Not Birds by Ashley St. Clair, an anti-transgender/nonbinary/gender-nonconforming/agender book
Fame, Blame, and the Raft of Shame by Dan Crenshaw (?! is this the congressman ?!), a book about the evils of cancel culture.
More Than Spots & Stripes by the Hodgetwins, a book about how evil critical race theory is evil
Paws off My Cannon by Dana Loesch (of the NRA!), about the second amendment
No, seriously, go look at this website. Go look at it and gape in horror.
This is what the website says about the company's founding:
"We founded Brave Books because while we were trying to raise our children to love their God and country, we became more and more aware that there is a real war being waged for the hearts and minds of the next generation. There is an agenda to confuse and demoralize our children and make them hate their country and the values that it was founded upon.
To us, it felt like a one-sided battle. That’s why BRAVE Books created an alternative to the current progressive agenda dominating children’s literature. Each book teaches a new traditional value that makes America so special. With the universe and cast of characters we have created as well as the BRAVE Challenges, we are creating a one-of-a-kind learning experience woven into an epic adventure that will live forever in your children's hearts and minds.
With a multi-saga plot, we hope these books will stay with your kids throughout their childhood and will equip them with a BRAVE spirit to combat the very real battle we face as a nation today."
The "progressive agenda" in children's literature?
I guess it shouldn't surprise me that attempting to affirm diversity in children's literature is such a controversial thing. Then again, I did just see that Florida is now banning issues of "social justice" in classrooms in its new experiments in educational fascism. So I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
And there is MERCH! MERCH FOR THIS BOOK!
One more thing, the copy of this book that I received was printed on 19 May 2022, the day after I ordered it. So it's a made-to-order piece of crap.
Alright, that's it.
Thank goodness, am I right?
When I first read this, my first reaction was, "I wonder if Hillary has seen it?"
At this point in Hillary Clinton's career, she's been subject to so many absurd attacks, I actually thought she might get a little bit of a kick out of something so dumb.
But now, sitting with it for a little bit, I am actively angry at this book.
I am an unapologetic picture book stan.
Picture books are both an art and a science. I firmly believe them to be integral in developing life-long habits of reading and of learning more broadly. There are few forms of media that can serve as genuine cultural touchstones that transcend generation in the way that well-crafted picture books can. Well-crafted picture books can open young minds to imagination, to the world around them, to the future that they create.
I often get frustrated when reading picture books written by authors that don't seem to understand this. To too many, it seems that picture books are assumed to be easier, to be throwaway literature.
Politicians who write children's books are especially prone to this. I always come back in my head to Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's picture book, Bold & Brave: Ten Heroes Who Won Women the Right to Vote . It's a decent enough book, well-intentioned, but very obviously written by someone who didn't really know how to write a children's book. Gillibrand's word choices are unnecessarily complicated, her descriptions dry. It's not a book written for a picture book audience in mind.
But this?
This is worse. Exponentially worse.
This book is creatively devoid. It is a poorly-done piece of political propaganda.
The Brave Books imprint is a right-wing propaganda machine, directed at young children. It is full of white grievance, anti-LGBTIQIAP+ prejudice, and what I imagine will be abuse of religious values, all cloaked in "patriotism."
I feel gross having spent money on this. I will be returning it as soon as I possibly can.
one last update:
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
2 December 2024
WELL IT HAPPENED HERE WE ARE FRIENDS HE'S GONNA DIRECT THE FBI.
God help us all.
Also, holy crap, The Rachel Maddow Show showed that there ARE TWO SEQUELS TO THIS BOOK. HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?
Again, God help us all.
14 November 2024
OHMYGOD IS THIS MAN ACTUALLY GOING TO BE A POWERFUL FIGURE IN THIS NEW TRUMP ADMINISTRATION?!
Sweet baby Jesus and the grown one, too.
Will this review make me a target? LMAO (but also not really).
28 August 2024
I saw two typos in this, now more than two years later. A bit embarrassed, I must admit.
2 June 2022
Amazon wouldn't let me post the bulk of this review because it was "inappropriate." LMAO.
17 May 2022
I have a hard time believing this is real.
25 May 2022
Okay, I bought and read this book so you don't have to.
No, seriously, don't buy this.
Last week, Mehdi Hasan, on his MSNBC on Peacock show, briefly addressed the fact that Kash Patel had written a children's book, The Plot Against the King. I was intrigued.
I first attempted to get the book from my local library system. I use three systems regularly (go Ohio libraries!) and none of the three had a copy of the book. On principle, I was pleased, but as a matter of getting the book in my hands, I was a little frustrated.
So, I bought it from Amazon. I intend to return it as soon as I can, as a matter of principle. (I don't give my money to trolls like Patel; I also don't buy books from Amazon.)
Now, I need it understood that I believe reasonable people can disagree when it comes to politics. I have a bit of a hard time reading biographies of politicians that, to my mind, valorize them beyond the realm of reasonable justification. Politicians are human beings, and even the finest of them have dark moments and mistakes in their past, and that level of nuance can be hard to convey in picture book form. (I have a rant about this related to Shirley Chisholm, who has been the subject of at least four very triumphal, very cursory picture book biographies in the last few years. I haven't really worked out all the details in that rant, and I will choose to spare you all in relating it. But I have a rant rolling around in my brain.)
But this isn't something that "reasonable people" can disagree over. This is political propaganda dressed up as a children's book.
Leni Riefenstahl
This is a stretch, but hear me out.
Documentary filmmaker Leni Riefenstahl is regarded as one of the finest filmmakers of her generation. Her films were Nazi Party propaganda, yet they demonstrated a level of technical expertise such that many film critics and historians are able to separate her films' significance from the fact that they are Nazi propaganda.
Now I don't know that that is the way Riefenstahl's films should be handled. I have never watched them. (I don't really watch movies, period, let alone propaganda from the 1930s.)
But the fact that that conversation happens suggests that Riefenstahl had technical skill worth studying.
THIS is not worth studying. There is no technical proficiency worth admiring. There is no creativity to marvel at. This is nonsense. This is an attempt at child-directed propaganda that valorizes Donald Trump, Devin Nunes, and Kash Patel. It will not be studied in a century by historians seeking to analyze its technical prowess.
If this book still exists in a century it will be seen as a pathetic waste of paper.
So first of all, you have to know who Kash Patel is.
Patel is a Donald Trump loyalist. After earning a JD, he worked for eight years as a federal public defender. He joined the US Department of Justice as a trial attorney in 2014.
In 2017, Patel was appointed senior counsel on counterterrorism at the House Select Committee on Intelligence. At the time, Rep. Devin Nunes (R-CA) was the chair of the committee.
From this vantage point, Patel played a prominent role in promoting the Republican discrediting of the investigations in Donald Trump and Russian interference in the 2016 election. He was the main author of a memo which charged that the FBI was biased against Trump, made public in January 2018. He had a murky role in the Trump-Ukraine scandal.
After the dismissal of Secretary of Defense Mark Esper, he was made chief of staff to Acting Secretary of Defense Christopher Miller.
It was reported after the end of the Trump administration that Trump had seriously contemplated naming him the Deputy Director of the CIA immediately before dismissing then-CIA director Gina Haspel, which would have meant Patel could lead the agency as Acting Director.
All told, Patel can't be said to be a major player in the Trump administration, but he was an unapologetic Trump loyalist. It seems likely Trump considered him useful, but again, he wasn't central.
I almost feel some pity here.
The story is practically incoherent, but the illustration is the result of someone who has a decent amount of talent. And I almost feel pity that she wasted her skills on such a piece of crap. (I know this seems to contradict what I said above, but I mean it! It's very colorful.)
Alright so the book itself.
I will be quoting liberally from the text.
Kash the Distinguished Discoverer
Kash Patel is the main character of the story. His avatar is Kash the Distinguished Discoverer. "Kash was known far and wife as the one person who could discover anything about anything. He found the Holy Grape, deep in the Enchanted Forest, and he discovered who had stolen the sleeping princess."
What is the Holy Grape? If there's some sort of real-world application there, I'll leave it to smarter people than I to figure it out.
The Russionians
The Russionians cheat at jousting tournaments, FYI. Apparently Kash is beloved by the heralds of the kingdom for exposing that!
Humble one, that Kash Patel is.
Oh and we're in the Land of the Free.
Because creativity and subtlety are clearly our strong suits.
Hillary Queenton
"The heralds had been announcing that Hillary Queenton would be queen. She says queenly things like thee and thou and forsooth, and he last name is Queenton, after all."
Queenton. Pardon me for quoting a cliché, but stick a fork in me I'm done.
...but the merchant Donald!
"But when the royal counter-uppers counted up the final votes, they realized the people had dared to choose the merchant Donald! The heralds and Hillary were horrified. Donald didn't care what the heralds said about him, and he was determined to Make the Kingdom Great Again."
Yep. Not MAGA, MKGA. And yes, there is plenty of MKGA paraphernalia.
Oh, and the heralds have signs that say "CNN" and "NYT" and "The Post."
Again, subtlety is not exactly a strength.
Oh, and it's cute that Donald is a "merchant."
A shifty-looking knight and a steel box!
"Then a shifty-looking knight jumped onto the stand. 'Donald isn't the rightful king. Inside this steel box, I have found a paper that says Donald cheated his way to the throne!'"
The avatars here aren't subtle, either. The shifty knight looks like Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA). Donald looks like a young, youthful Trump. Hillary Queenton is on this page, looking like Mr. Burns from The Simpsons. Oh, and the steel box is the Steele dossier.
"'Apparently,' sad the shifty knight, 'Donald made friends with the Russionians while drinking cherry ginger ale in the Swirly Tower Tavern in Russionia, and they helped him cheat!'"
Duke Devin!
Duke Devin is "loyal to the core" (gag). It's not wrong, Devin Nunes was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom for unwavering loyalty to Donald Trump in 2021, alongside fellow Trump sycophant Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH). It is quite possible that their receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom permanently damaged that prize's reputation.
Oh, and those heralds from before? Donald calls them "fake heralds." (Where's our "alternative heralds"?)
Duke Devin and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer set out on The Quest for the Truth about the Plot Against the King. Yes, that is how it is described. And yes, the italics are in the text itself.
Much like Donald Trump's Twitter account, it seems Kash Patel missed the elementary school lessons on what is appropriate usage of capital letters.
I feel like I'm writing a parody. But this is real.
They find slug juice.
Keeper Komey is the keeper of the slugs Duke Devin and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer find a letter from Hillary Queenton, written to Keeper Komey, thanking him for the papers in the steel box.
Scandalous!
Then they go to Russionia to find the Swirly Tower Tavern.
But there IS no such place! And the steel box paper is looking very suspicious! And "Everyone knows King Donald doesn't even drink cherry ginger ale."
Apparently cherry ginger ale is the avatar for the infamous pee tape.
Ew.
So the steel box is a lie and the shifty knight admits he just doesn't like Donald.
Kash goes to tell this info to Donald. Hillary Queenton and Keeper Komey chase him and then fall off the stairs to the tower. (Not going to lie, I fully was convinced that they just killed off those two characters. That seems entirely fitting with this storyline. but no, they aren't killed.)
Kash stood up and addressed everybody. "Everybody! I am Kash, the Great Wizard and the Distinguished Discoverer. I have discovered that the king, King Donald, is innocent! HE did not work with the Russionians, and he did not cheat. You chose him, so he became king, fair and square. Hillary wrote that paper and had her sneaky slugs slide it into the steel box for the shifty knight to find. Now that you know more of the facts, it's time for you to think carefully and decide what you think of the king. Don't just trust the person with the loudest trumpet."
And the people all cheer and they have a party for Donald and Komey and Hillary get banished from the kingdom.
"And so, Duke Devin, King Donald, and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer whent back into the castle to share a nice meal with no cherry ginger ale. With that, the Kingdom was Made Great Again, and from that day on, they lived happily ever after."
That's how our story ends.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
There's a "true story" section, which seems to wildly exaggerate Kash Patel's significance in the story.
Oh, and don't forget to follow Kash Patel on Truth Social @Kash.
OKAY BUT THEN WE GET TO THE VERY END AND IT'S AN ADVERTISEMENT FOR BRAVEBOOKS.COM
Okay, you really gotta go look at BraveBooks.com.
This is a book publishing company that publishes literature that emphasizes culture war politics.
Among the other titles are:
The Fight for Freedom Island by Trent Talbot, a book that teaches about freedom, apparently
Elephants Are Not Birds by Ashley St. Clair, an anti-transgender/nonbinary/gender-nonconforming/agender book
Fame, Blame, and the Raft of Shame by Dan Crenshaw (?! is this the congressman ?!), a book about the evils of cancel culture.
More Than Spots & Stripes by the Hodgetwins, a book about how evil critical race theory is evil
Paws off My Cannon by Dana Loesch (of the NRA!), about the second amendment
No, seriously, go look at this website. Go look at it and gape in horror.
This is what the website says about the company's founding:
"We founded Brave Books because while we were trying to raise our children to love their God and country, we became more and more aware that there is a real war being waged for the hearts and minds of the next generation. There is an agenda to confuse and demoralize our children and make them hate their country and the values that it was founded upon.
To us, it felt like a one-sided battle. That’s why BRAVE Books created an alternative to the current progressive agenda dominating children’s literature. Each book teaches a new traditional value that makes America so special. With the universe and cast of characters we have created as well as the BRAVE Challenges, we are creating a one-of-a-kind learning experience woven into an epic adventure that will live forever in your children's hearts and minds.
With a multi-saga plot, we hope these books will stay with your kids throughout their childhood and will equip them with a BRAVE spirit to combat the very real battle we face as a nation today."
The "progressive agenda" in children's literature?
I guess it shouldn't surprise me that attempting to affirm diversity in children's literature is such a controversial thing. Then again, I did just see that Florida is now banning issues of "social justice" in classrooms in its new experiments in educational fascism. So I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
And there is MERCH! MERCH FOR THIS BOOK!
One more thing, the copy of this book that I received was printed on 19 May 2022, the day after I ordered it. So it's a made-to-order piece of crap.
Alright, that's it.
Thank goodness, am I right?
When I first read this, my first reaction was, "I wonder if Hillary has seen it?"
At this point in Hillary Clinton's career, she's been subject to so many absurd attacks, I actually thought she might get a little bit of a kick out of something so dumb.
But now, sitting with it for a little bit, I am actively angry at this book.
I am an unapologetic picture book stan.
Picture books are both an art and a science. I firmly believe them to be integral in developing life-long habits of reading and of learning more broadly. There are few forms of media that can serve as genuine cultural touchstones that transcend generation in the way that well-crafted picture books can. Well-crafted picture books can open young minds to imagination, to the world around them, to the future that they create.
I often get frustrated when reading picture books written by authors that don't seem to understand this. To too many, it seems that picture books are assumed to be easier, to be throwaway literature.
Politicians who write children's books are especially prone to this. I always come back in my head to Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's picture book, Bold & Brave: Ten Heroes Who Won Women the Right to Vote . It's a decent enough book, well-intentioned, but very obviously written by someone who didn't really know how to write a children's book. Gillibrand's word choices are unnecessarily complicated, her descriptions dry. It's not a book written for a picture book audience in mind.
But this?
This is worse. Exponentially worse.
This book is creatively devoid. It is a poorly-done piece of political propaganda.
The Brave Books imprint is a right-wing propaganda machine, directed at young children. It is full of white grievance, anti-LGBTIQIAP+ prejudice, and what I imagine will be abuse of religious values, all cloaked in "patriotism."
I feel gross having spent money on this. I will be returning it as soon as I possibly can.
June 6, 2022
This can’t be serious. I just don’t understand how an American can lose all that makes them American and worship a con-artist enough to believe a lie and even try to indoctrinate children with the lie. Maybe it’s written for Trump worshipping adults. It would be the correct reading level. Just terrible beyond belief
June 15, 2022
I did have a look at this book. My neighbor bought it for sh*ts & giggles. I am sorry, this fantastical tale should never be introduced to children. I agree with Jennifer G 100%.
But wait! The book was published on April 1, and so - is "...a terrible true story" true or not?
May 28, 2022
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL There's fantasy, and then there's delusion. Save your time, money, and grip on sanity. No. Just no.
August 8, 2022
The reviews calling this book propaganda are missing the point. This is world-historical ultra-MAGA counter-propaganda.
Call me old-fashioned (or whatever) but I like kings. I want law, judgment, mercy, and faith. And I love happy endings.
Five stars for mystery and wit and for hitting back hard.
P. S. Dear Distinguished Discoverer, if you see this, please write a sequel about who stole the sleeping princess. We want to know. We've wanted to know for a very long time. We hope that story will have a happy ending too. Thank you for using your powers for good!
Call me old-fashioned (or whatever) but I like kings. I want law, judgment, mercy, and faith. And I love happy endings.
Five stars for mystery and wit and for hitting back hard.
P. S. Dear Distinguished Discoverer, if you see this, please write a sequel about who stole the sleeping princess. We want to know. We've wanted to know for a very long time. We hope that story will have a happy ending too. Thank you for using your powers for good!
June 8, 2022
I don't usually review books I haven't read, but even from the synopsis published by the author himself I have enough to go on because just from that I can tell this book is based on nothing but Donald Trump's gargantuan ego and narc rage that he ended up as the first one-term president in almost 30 years. Teaching children "history" is teaching them objective truths; this will end up in 'secondary sources' material when they learn about the role of propaganda in influencing the public.
February 21, 2025
NOTE: Read* this a while ago, but wanted to wait to see how it all played out before posting. But of course, there was never any doubt because, well, this is where we are now, people.
REVIEW: This is a deeply, deeply stupid book, that probably took all of an hour to write, and not much longer to illustrate. I refuse to list it on any "children's" bookshelves, because it was obviously not written for them — no child would understand what Patel is saying here, or who the hell his various characters are: Hillary Queenton, Duke Devin, Kash the Distinguished Discoverer, Keeper Komey, etc., (others appear in Patel's two "sequels," including Sleepy Joe and Comma-la-la-la). It wasn't even really written for those gullible MAGA saps who buy online baseball cards of Trump dressed as a cowboy or rock star, (although as with all Trump's geegaws, they obviously bought it by the truckload). No, this was blatantly written for a deeply disturbed and insecure audience of one...and man, did it pay off — because as of yesterday, this unqualified and vindictive buffoon is now the highest law enforcement official in the country.
Anyway, if you have the time and stomach for it, take about ten minutes and read some of both the 1- and 5-star reviews here (since there’s almost nothing in between)…and then let me know (or at least consider) if you see ANY way of bringing this country back together again.
SPOILER: (Although not really a spoiler; just a NSFW rant that I just couldn't NOT add)
No idea where we go now as a country (or kingdom?) from here…but I think I’m starting to root for the asteroid!
___________________________________
* And no, I didn't actually "read" this, as thankfully none of the libraries or bookstores around here stock this turd — but I did watch one of several available YouTube videos where some poor sap (in my case, "Grandma Cookie" at BabyBeanStoryTime) read the whole thing and showed all the pictures, and it was just EXCRUCIATING.
REVIEW: This is a deeply, deeply stupid book, that probably took all of an hour to write, and not much longer to illustrate. I refuse to list it on any "children's" bookshelves, because it was obviously not written for them — no child would understand what Patel is saying here, or who the hell his various characters are: Hillary Queenton, Duke Devin, Kash the Distinguished Discoverer, Keeper Komey, etc., (others appear in Patel's two "sequels," including Sleepy Joe and Comma-la-la-la). It wasn't even really written for those gullible MAGA saps who buy online baseball cards of Trump dressed as a cowboy or rock star, (although as with all Trump's geegaws, they obviously bought it by the truckload). No, this was blatantly written for a deeply disturbed and insecure audience of one...and man, did it pay off — because as of yesterday, this unqualified and vindictive buffoon is now the highest law enforcement official in the country.
Anyway, if you have the time and stomach for it, take about ten minutes and read some of both the 1- and 5-star reviews here (since there’s almost nothing in between)…and then let me know (or at least consider) if you see ANY way of bringing this country back together again.
SPOILER: (Although not really a spoiler; just a NSFW rant that I just couldn't NOT add)
No idea where we go now as a country (or kingdom?) from here…but I think I’m starting to root for the asteroid!
___________________________________
* And no, I didn't actually "read" this, as thankfully none of the libraries or bookstores around here stock this turd — but I did watch one of several available YouTube videos where some poor sap (in my case, "Grandma Cookie" at BabyBeanStoryTime) read the whole thing and showed all the pictures, and it was just EXCRUCIATING.
June 1, 2022
What a terrible book filled with lies and propaganda. Save your time and money.
September 29, 2025
“𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘰 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯. 𝘐 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦.”
If this were truly the case, and truly written by the director of the FBI, all names found in the Epstein files would be behind bars. And honestly, all their wealth should be dispersed to folks that don’t have to pay away their student loans to eternity
*hi it’s me i am the folk paying away student loans to eternity
The perfect reflection of how America is abysmal and will destroy itself inside out.
Feed lies to children.
Worship the wrong.
Perpetuate it in reality.
And let’s not forget, this is supposedly a children’s book.
p/s: read via Tiktok read-along because who tf would devote their time, money, or library loans to this
pp/s: if ever found in any library destroy at all costs
If this were truly the case, and truly written by the director of the FBI, all names found in the Epstein files would be behind bars. And honestly, all their wealth should be dispersed to folks that don’t have to pay away their student loans to eternity
*hi it’s me i am the folk paying away student loans to eternity
The perfect reflection of how America is abysmal and will destroy itself inside out.
Feed lies to children.
Worship the wrong.
Perpetuate it in reality.
And let’s not forget, this is supposedly a children’s book.
p/s: read via Tiktok read-along because who tf would devote their time, money, or library loans to this
pp/s: if ever found in any library destroy at all costs
June 6, 2022
Not quite Animal Farm but a close second. It’s surely to trigger Hillary’a minions. Just read some of the other reviews here to get a glimpse of what indoctrination has done to their mind.
June 21, 2022
Perfect! Very clever. Loved it! Great job as always, Kash Patel.
“All of the people nodded. “The heralds must be right. After all, they have loud trumpets and important pieces of paper. And so, even though they hadn’t looked at all the facts, everyone agreed.”
“We tried our best to find evidence. Keeper Komey even sent his slugs into the castle to spy on the king. But I don’t care that we couldn’t find anything.” The shifty knight shifted. “I just really don’t like Donald.” Then the shifty knight ran straight to the heralds. “Heralds!” he said. “Go forth throughout the kingdom! I have a very good reason to believe king Donald is a cheater.” “What is it?” “I can’t tell you; it’s a secret,” the shifty knight smiled. “Oooh,” said the heralds. They all loved secrets. “We’ll tell everyone right away.” And so they did.’
All of the people nodded when they heard. “They must be right. After all, they have loud trumpets and an important secret.”
“Hillary wrote that paper and had her sneaky slugs slide it into the steel box for the shifty knight to find.”
The hypocrisy of Joe Biden & his villainous, treacherous party is only matched by their rampant corruption and constant lying. They will tell any lie—no matter how outrageous, they fund election theft & they engage in whatever evil necessary to cover their crimes and paint themselves as the party who cares.
Keep digging for truth #kashpatel #dinesh #devinnunes
https://uncoverdc.com/2022/05/09/2000...
https://rumble.com/v14bxrt-2000-mules...
“All of the people nodded. “The heralds must be right. After all, they have loud trumpets and important pieces of paper. And so, even though they hadn’t looked at all the facts, everyone agreed.”
“We tried our best to find evidence. Keeper Komey even sent his slugs into the castle to spy on the king. But I don’t care that we couldn’t find anything.” The shifty knight shifted. “I just really don’t like Donald.” Then the shifty knight ran straight to the heralds. “Heralds!” he said. “Go forth throughout the kingdom! I have a very good reason to believe king Donald is a cheater.” “What is it?” “I can’t tell you; it’s a secret,” the shifty knight smiled. “Oooh,” said the heralds. They all loved secrets. “We’ll tell everyone right away.” And so they did.’
All of the people nodded when they heard. “They must be right. After all, they have loud trumpets and an important secret.”
“Hillary wrote that paper and had her sneaky slugs slide it into the steel box for the shifty knight to find.”
The hypocrisy of Joe Biden & his villainous, treacherous party is only matched by their rampant corruption and constant lying. They will tell any lie—no matter how outrageous, they fund election theft & they engage in whatever evil necessary to cover their crimes and paint themselves as the party who cares.
Keep digging for truth #kashpatel #dinesh #devinnunes
https://uncoverdc.com/2022/05/09/2000...
https://rumble.com/v14bxrt-2000-mules...
June 13, 2022
A great story told by a very clever writer - the artwork is exceptional as well. I can't wait to hold on to the book until I have grandkids to read it to!
December 1, 2024
Children should be taught to plot against kings. They should be taught HOW to plot against kings. Throw tea in the harbor if you have to. Do what you gotta do!
December 26, 2022
This book is a grotesque abuse of the trust that children give adults. If adults want to read this trash book to themselves, that’s their business, but it’s disgusting to think about the lies in this book being read to innocent kids.
And frankly, it’s also an obvious grift to make money off of delusional adults.
All around terrible. Zero stars.
And frankly, it’s also an obvious grift to make money off of delusional adults.
All around terrible. Zero stars.
July 3, 2022
Each & every person that has given this book a negative review is a either a certifiably deranged, unhinged stooge or just a simple, easily brainwashed little sheep that also believes in unicorns, leprechauns & that there are more than TWO genders.
October 23, 2024
This is blatant propaganda written for children (or really ignorant adults). It's gross--and rather menacing--that people in our country have sunk so far as to start brainwashing children just like they did to the Nazi Youth in WW2 Germany.
Indoctrination of our youth in any form is obscene. (For example: all the military recruiters who pose as creepy "pals" to our middle schoolers. I don't like your profession either. Stick with the high school level at least.)
Let's save the pedagogical dogma for adults who have the ability if not the will to seek the truth for themselves and weed through all the biases. Truth Social is NOT the place for that, btw, which is where this book originates. It is a propaganda machine created and owned by the Donald Trump Organization which uses fear-mongering as a tool and blatant untruths as a deadly weapon, not to mention being another money-grabbing opportunity for DT to steal from his supporters.
Yes, I realize my Goodreads tags are sporadic and counter eachother. They illustrate my mental state trying to process this load of horseshit.
Indoctrination of our youth in any form is obscene. (For example: all the military recruiters who pose as creepy "pals" to our middle schoolers. I don't like your profession either. Stick with the high school level at least.)
Let's save the pedagogical dogma for adults who have the ability if not the will to seek the truth for themselves and weed through all the biases. Truth Social is NOT the place for that, btw, which is where this book originates. It is a propaganda machine created and owned by the Donald Trump Organization which uses fear-mongering as a tool and blatant untruths as a deadly weapon, not to mention being another money-grabbing opportunity for DT to steal from his supporters.
Yes, I realize my Goodreads tags are sporadic and counter eachother. They illustrate my mental state trying to process this load of horseshit.
October 1, 2022
Well written and in a way that you can use it to teach ethics to children. Many do not know that most of the early nursery ryhmes were actually real testaments to what was happening at the time. Yes there are those who are your hard core MSM, CNN etc listeners who are so brainwashed they will never accept this book. However, keep in mind those stations are owned by the same people that are corrupting our nation. The book written by Kash who is highly regarded in the high end security field did an excellent job of keeping the message simple. For a more in depth analysis you will need to check out the Epoch Times.
December 9, 2024
Wow! Definitely a five out of five. I think it's wonderful that they let a child write a fantasy book about modern elections.
The way our author, five year old Kash describes the characters is whimsical and fun. The sort of thing you want to see from a child!
Kash Patel's ability to slyly suggest he understands how politics work all while writing an engaging story full of obvious pun names is exactly what I'd expect from a five year old whose parents only let them watch OAN. He really delivers!
The way our author, five year old Kash describes the characters is whimsical and fun. The sort of thing you want to see from a child!
Kash Patel's ability to slyly suggest he understands how politics work all while writing an engaging story full of obvious pun names is exactly what I'd expect from a five year old whose parents only let them watch OAN. He really delivers!
Read
June 2, 2022The book is clever. There are several topics i plant to purchase many. So what if its related to politics. Weve been indoctrinated all our lives with lies. Were we taught law in school? No but whats the first thing we experience when we learn to drive? The LAW!! WAKE UP AMERICA. WAKE UP PEOPLE.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 20, 2022
More propaganda, more lies from the most corrupt monster of a president ever!
December 3, 2024
This so-called "children's" book, and I use that term generously, is penned (perhaps "scrawled" is more appropriate) by what can only be described as a brain-damaged extremist. If you’re in the mood for a good laugh at someone else’s expense, this is the gold mine you’ve been looking for. Pro tip: snag it from Z-Library—you don’t want to spend a cent on this literary catastrophe.
The book reeks of pure propaganda and should come with a warning: Keep away from kids unless you want to undo years of critical thinking development. It’s unfettered sycophantic butt-kissing at its most cringe-inducing, so much so that it almost becomes a work of unintentional comedy.
Honestly, it’s so bad it’s good. Grab a doobie, settle in, and prepare for the laugh riot of a lifetime. You’ll be doubled over in disbelief at just how awful it is. Enjoy!
The book reeks of pure propaganda and should come with a warning: Keep away from kids unless you want to undo years of critical thinking development. It’s unfettered sycophantic butt-kissing at its most cringe-inducing, so much so that it almost becomes a work of unintentional comedy.
Honestly, it’s so bad it’s good. Grab a doobie, settle in, and prepare for the laugh riot of a lifetime. You’ll be doubled over in disbelief at just how awful it is. Enjoy!
May 29, 2022
If you want an unbiased review, you won’t find one here.
August 2, 2022
Horrible
Read
September 7, 2022Zero stars. Garbage book.
December 2, 2024
Disturbing
December 4, 2024
Garbage. Pure maga propaganda.
October 11, 2025
holy propaganda (also just terribly written. like, children’s literature is important and to be taken seriously — at least put some effort into your indoctrination)
September 19, 2025
Kash Patel should've just left this in the drafts.
I find it kind of strange that the FBI Director of the United States of America spent a lot of time writing self-insert fanfiction of Donald Trump that glorifies his political feud with Hilary Clinton for children. I thought that this was satire until I learned that Kash Patel was serious. I didn't even know that this was a trilogy until I started writing this review...
Anyway, the artwork is decent. The writing is whatever, but the contents of the book are literally just a huge middle finger to democrats and other Trump critics.
We get it, Trump got voted in to office. But what was the point of the book? In the story, Patel embarrasses himself as he appears as a drooling fanboy dressed as a wizard praising a man who isn't and never will be a king. The book is as unamerican as I thought it would be.
I find it kind of strange that the FBI Director of the United States of America spent a lot of time writing self-insert fanfiction of Donald Trump that glorifies his political feud with Hilary Clinton for children. I thought that this was satire until I learned that Kash Patel was serious. I didn't even know that this was a trilogy until I started writing this review...
Anyway, the artwork is decent. The writing is whatever, but the contents of the book are literally just a huge middle finger to democrats and other Trump critics.
We get it, Trump got voted in to office. But what was the point of the book? In the story, Patel embarrasses himself as he appears as a drooling fanboy dressed as a wizard praising a man who isn't and never will be a king. The book is as unamerican as I thought it would be.
September 20, 2025
About as dog shit as you'd expect.
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