This was the first R-rated movie I saw as an under-age teenager escorting my brother. While it may have made an impression at that time, I certainly did not have any conversations with anyone to either explain or debrief about my experience. Now almost four decades later I read the book and come across the philosophy within it.
In some ways it scares me and in others I appreciate the liberation it offers. Ultimately I have to ask under whose guidance can such a philosophy be a liberation rather than a transfer of power from one oppression to another?
When I look back on my life’s experiences, and become evermore aware of the limitations I experienced at younger ages, I have to acknowledge that I did not receive guidance for most of it when I needed it. I was opened to false expectations by those who were equally irresponsible within their own lives as they were for what they introduced me to.
I say this, not out of condemnation but merely from the facts of the times: I was under-age when they were not. I was not expected to be able to process what others new to such experiences “as adults” were testing out for themselves. Some kind of appropriate guidance should have been given, some context against which I could have gained traction and understanding of my own.
I realise now that many of my own later failures came back to such irresponsibility of elders around me at such times. (surely this is what all the controversy around paedophilia is about?!)
Yet I have tried to guide others through new experiences with a more responsible attitude. Whether it be my own children or friends who I recognise as having gaps in their own experiences that need a gentler approach than their adult years may otherwise expect of them. Perhaps it is just such a realisation of the inadequacy of how I was respected by elders that makes me so sensitive to the needs of others. It certainly undermines our relationships in so many ways when morality can be so confronting and challenging, and yet we have at some stage in our lives to grapple with it and place the morality of others in some perspective to our own choices and standards.
So I read Emmanuelle now “as if it is a Manual” rather than just absorbing what impressions I could from the big screen in a small theatre. I consider the tales of a teenage friend seeing The Godfather as her first R-rated experience, and my comparative experience with a fellow female teenager seeing the double-bill of Easyrider and Stone, also R-rated at the university while we were still in high school.
I realise that I simply blocked out this earliest experience. Consciously at least.
I must have had conversations with others about it at times, when I look back on other experiences I shared with later boyfriends, but despite that there seem to have been influences at play upon me for some reactions I gave in particular situations I was otherwise unaware of in a consequential way.
I have to then conclude that part of my upbringing was in fact a male-dominated training ground to prepare me as being available to other males who may later ask certain behaviours of me.
My training as a child was largely based upon the “seen and not heard” dictum of Victorian times, yet it was also given doses of liberalisation by subsequent eras of laxity and challenge. The seesawing of these eras was not something I could openly identify. It was merely the expectation of my parents to not speak about certain things in mixed (meaning outside the family) company. But in a family that was very open to outsiders “as if they were family” such things as being in our house come mealtime, it was rather vague at times to understand how to draw such lines consistently.
Then there were such comments as that from my father: “three forbidden topics: sex, politics and religion, are the three topics we tended to talk about all the time among our friends when we were growing up”. Was it a challenge to us to contradict him or to any sense of authority in a world half collapsed by the early death of his own father when he was only 9?
Thus the dilemma of appropriate guidance.
(I could add a very private situation here about my husband, but being an ex-husband I cannot contact him for permission over such a disclosure – suffice to say it also relates to paedophilia, and the current Catholic crisis we keep hearing about in the media, though not within the walls of the institutions themselves – and it very much had consequences far beyond “the perpetrator/s”, yet not seeming to feed back to them in any direct way. But all of this experience is many years after the recounting I am doing here.)
so I say again: Thus the dilemma of appropriate guidance.
Who is the appropriate guide for any particular person at any particular age, if not the person who does introduce them or initiate them to a new understanding of the world?
I can’t say that school offered any better way of treating such topics than the vagaries of the people generally around at home, in “bedroom conversations” (given that the only space a child can consider its own is the bed on which it sleeps), or community groups such as Sunday school or activity clubs that were available at that time.
We all learn “together”. We bump into each other’s knowledge, prejudices and questions. We project our limitations more than our strengths, and this seems to be a growing fashion rather than a receding one.
There is no appropriate, only appropriation.
If you look too innocent someone will determine that you need to be taught “a lesson”. Whether you want it or not never seems to be the point.
And so we come to the book Emmanuelle.
In just such manner does Emmanuelle herself begin by opening herself up to new experience, and periodically questioning herself about how she is to find out what others intend if she does not allow them to present themselves to her fully.
She shifts gradually from not knowing what she doesn’t know, but at least appreciating that she will not know unless she allows herself to. Then she begins to limit the impositions others make upon her in their presumptions that she will repeat “lessons” that she merely considers behaviours once she has experienced them.
She also gradually shifts between her awareness of those who she feels might be able to teach her more and those who she doubts capable but somehow prove themselves to her in ways that she tests against her own boundaries of knowledge rather than just comfort.
In this way the book is presented as if it is all about learning and growing consciousness. But there is a failure to delineate between one’s own choices and the imposition of choices already made by others, though assumed to be a mutual opening in them as Emmanuelle helps them experience what they had not previously known. In this way it enters the territory of the unguided, the experimenter – as if such a space holds no dangers, should brook no fear (or caution, which may be a better consideration here).
It is just such territory that has proven to be inappropriate in so many educational and clerical situations between adults and children that now produces such outcries of abuse across society. Who is the appropriate guide when systems want to step in where people used to reside? What is the appropriate setting to find out what options are really being offered before you partake of them?
There can be no presumption that one approach fits all in such matters.
Throughout the book Emmanuelle is constantly fed by others as being somehow made for the role they expect her to fulfil for them, as much as on her own behalf or for her own edification or enjoyment. But how can a female, who is denied by her gender from membership, know that a comment such as “there is a freemasonry of beauty” has an answer such as the one she gives? She quotes an alternative source, thus showing her own prior education and applying it to this situation in such a way that surprises her erstwhile teacher.
Thus we can see that we are each prepared by our own experiences to walk the pathways that are our own, but we help forge them with each subsequent fellow-traveller. To reach the conclusion that all experience is open for all seems logical. It does not however, help us ward off experiences we would rather not have, encounters we would rather not be challenged by where others are determined to take undue advantage of our lesser knowledge or willingness to interpret the world in the ways they see fit.
It is not to say that anyone should necessarily be limited by the least in their limitations, but neither is it to say that “anything goes” for everyone.
Individual choice requires some guidance about how to say the rate of change that you are subjected to as much as which behaviours or experiences you would prefer to keep within specific circles, or not have for yourself at all.
As I said, one approach does not fit all. And indeed, the presumption of this book that one’s “beauty” as interpreted by others should require that certain people undertake particular ways of living that is denied or limited to others of less physical appeal, only underlines the projectionism of this methodology.
For people who are not constantly looking into mirrors, or indeed have no inclination to consider them as a means of considering their own perceptions of the world, to be bombarded by the designs of others to participate as if they were so driven is shere madness. There is no single rulebook, despite the sense of dictatorship that so many people seem to carry around within themselves.
To dictate permissiveness is as bad as dictating total abstention. The choices remain with the participants, but the testing out of situations is as much part of these choices, as the follow-through to any preconceived or yet to be conceived conclusions.
In particular I note the lack of personality of the “native” seconded in the final scene of the book. There is a sense in which this scene is a metaphor for the usurping of personal choice in colonialism which far surpasses the so-called freedoms of the other participants throughout this volume. We neither hear the negotiations nor the name of the native participant. Permission to participate is presumed to be upon an equally free footing. Preparation through his cultural upbringing surely raises questions around this just as I have raised my own issues of “initiation” in viewing such a movie with no possibility of knowing what I was opening myself up to.
The difference could be said that such a native does indeed know what to expect. But whether to conceive of such an expectation as abuse or respect surely remains another matter that cannot adequately be judged from such a work as this – unknown as it is to be autobiography or novel.
How can we even begin to understand the differentiation between metaphor and actual behaviours when intellectualism is testing out our imaginations in such a way?
In the Bible Jesus says: “to think is to do”. And so he defines sin as inappropriate thinking as much as inappropriate action. Buddhism likewise speaks of Right Thinking and Right Action as two parts of its eight-fold path.
While Emmanuelle is taught about dividing herself in apportioning her experiences to others, this is not given a context of then being a fuller person by knowing her own parts more intimately. It is left to a potentially inadequate audience to interpret such dividing and rearranging of one’s experiences as a precision of self-awareness rather than merely self-indulgence in partiality.
It is not the teaching alone that is a problem with regard this book, but the continual sense that so many limited people are likely to hold on to their own limitations as impositions on the ability of others to adequately interpret it for themselves.
Mastery is not the problem – rather belief in mastery by those who are a long way off it for themselves or appreciating it in others.
The dangers we currently face in society are based upon such clashes of righteousness. It seems less possible to know who one can trust for appropriate guidance than at previous times in our history. The ever-shifting ground between privacy and perverse privation tests many of us beyond legitimate capability for developing maturity in such matters. The context of this book, and therefore its quotes and references, is not so easily recognisable as it may have been within the society it was written for. And yet we might expect that the openness of the internet helps us overcome that remarkably easily.
The nature of the internet is such that to seek any particle of information is to open oneself to a swag of word-related trash on an astronomically geometric basis. What filters can we truly place to adjust our digestive systems for such potential bombardment? It is not an invitation I would want to put out into the ether without adequate consideration. There are too many deprived and depraved people that I would rather not have responsibility for teaching about the most intimate experiences I would like to be able to share with a single, or even a few, closely selected individuals of adequate self-development. The more I have been around such circles as consider themselves involved in self-development the more I have to consider the limitations of these spheres.
So I return again to the question: who is an appropriate guide? What is an appropriate setting? And I rest before making a conclusion that limits me to disappointment and dissatisfaction forever, which is another aspect of this work that I am wary of – to actually bear dissatisfaction as the motivating force to continue exploration.
I retain the right to feel adequate and appreciative from time to time. And currently am experiencing the longest period of just such satisfaction in my life.