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The Existence of Amy
Amy has a normal life. That is, if you were to go by a definition of 'no obvious indicators of peculiarity', and you didn't know her very well. She has good friends, a good job, a nice enough home. This normality, however, is precariously plastered on top of a different life. A life that is Amy's real life. The only one her brain will let her lead.
What is it really like to live with mental illness?
An insight into the reality of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), anxiety and depression.
What is it really like to live with mental illness?
An insight into the reality of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), anxiety and depression.
279 pages, Paperback
First published August 2, 2019
361 people are currently reading
9354 people want to read
About the author
Lana Grace Riva
2 books84 followersLinks for further detail, social media, and contact:
https://linktr.ee/lanagraceriva
https://linktr.ee/lanagraceriva
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 676 reviews
August 12, 2020
Lana Grace Riva joined us for a Q & A in the Behind the Pages group and gave us some great insight into The Existence Of Amy. You can find the Q & A here.
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
My review
Amy seems like she functions on the outside, but she is good at hiding the daily struggles going on in her head. I instantly connected with our main character Amy and was completely drawn into her life. In some ways, many of us can relate to some of Amy's life and thoughts; however, Amy battles with most of the things she does every day and her brain prevents her from doing the things she needs and wants to do.
Lana Grace Riva keeps the plot simple here and it's all about Amy's daily struggles with her brain that disrupts her daily life. She does a fantastic job of putting us in Amy's shoes allowing us to experience Amy's thoughts with her. Some of her thoughts are louder and more intrusive than others and we can see which thoughts she can manage and others that she can't. I could relate to some of Amy's quieter thoughts and sadden by the thoughts that disrupt her life.
As heartbreaking as Amy's journey is at times, it is also heartwarming and hopeful. It's an important story that shows us we are not alone and Lana Grace Riva quietly shows us through the actions of the characters just how important is for people to seen and not suffer alone. The story wraps up hopeful with the actions of the characters and a message shines through that left me with peaceful thoughts. I highly recommend this book to everyone!!
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
My review
Amy seems like she functions on the outside, but she is good at hiding the daily struggles going on in her head. I instantly connected with our main character Amy and was completely drawn into her life. In some ways, many of us can relate to some of Amy's life and thoughts; however, Amy battles with most of the things she does every day and her brain prevents her from doing the things she needs and wants to do.
Lana Grace Riva keeps the plot simple here and it's all about Amy's daily struggles with her brain that disrupts her daily life. She does a fantastic job of putting us in Amy's shoes allowing us to experience Amy's thoughts with her. Some of her thoughts are louder and more intrusive than others and we can see which thoughts she can manage and others that she can't. I could relate to some of Amy's quieter thoughts and sadden by the thoughts that disrupt her life.
As heartbreaking as Amy's journey is at times, it is also heartwarming and hopeful. It's an important story that shows us we are not alone and Lana Grace Riva quietly shows us through the actions of the characters just how important is for people to seen and not suffer alone. The story wraps up hopeful with the actions of the characters and a message shines through that left me with peaceful thoughts. I highly recommend this book to everyone!!
October 15, 2021
Rounded down from around 4.5 stars ⭐️ I have honestly never read a book so fast in my life. I found myself devouring it!
The Existence of Amy is a fictional tale of a young woman struggling with OCD and depression. We follow her through the bad days and the ‘better’ days. However, all of them are tinged by her mental health issues in some way.
I felt a very personal connection with this book. I myself have struggled a lot with my mental health over the years. There were parts, especially at the end that I really connected to. What I love about this book is that it isn’t a self-help book. It’s telling the brutal and honest truth of what it is like to live with these mental health conditions. OCD in particular seems to have become a label that is flippantly thrown around- e.g. ‘ohh I need all my pens in a line, I’m so OCD’. I always find these sentences tough to hear although I know that they are never meant with malice. This book shows how truly life destroying OCD can become. It does not hold back, and I have so much praise for that.
There’s hope and despair weaved through these pages. The hope is never too much, just like it never really can be all encompassing for those with mental health issues. The chapters were wonderfully short which definitely helped me feel like I was speeding through the book! I absolutely loved some of Amy’s friends in the books. The people in your life really are the most important during the hard times and that was so wonderfully portrayed in her relationships. I’ve never before read a book where the main character has OCD, I am really hoping I’ll be able to find more like this one!
I would recommend this to anyone that wants to know more about what living with OCD can be like. It is a quick, informative and fast paced read! I want to thank Lana Grace Riva for allowing me to read a copy of this book so I could give my personal thoughts.
The Existence of Amy is a fictional tale of a young woman struggling with OCD and depression. We follow her through the bad days and the ‘better’ days. However, all of them are tinged by her mental health issues in some way.
I felt a very personal connection with this book. I myself have struggled a lot with my mental health over the years. There were parts, especially at the end that I really connected to. What I love about this book is that it isn’t a self-help book. It’s telling the brutal and honest truth of what it is like to live with these mental health conditions. OCD in particular seems to have become a label that is flippantly thrown around- e.g. ‘ohh I need all my pens in a line, I’m so OCD’. I always find these sentences tough to hear although I know that they are never meant with malice. This book shows how truly life destroying OCD can become. It does not hold back, and I have so much praise for that.
There’s hope and despair weaved through these pages. The hope is never too much, just like it never really can be all encompassing for those with mental health issues. The chapters were wonderfully short which definitely helped me feel like I was speeding through the book! I absolutely loved some of Amy’s friends in the books. The people in your life really are the most important during the hard times and that was so wonderfully portrayed in her relationships. I’ve never before read a book where the main character has OCD, I am really hoping I’ll be able to find more like this one!
I would recommend this to anyone that wants to know more about what living with OCD can be like. It is a quick, informative and fast paced read! I want to thank Lana Grace Riva for allowing me to read a copy of this book so I could give my personal thoughts.
July 15, 2020
4 stars!
Insightful. Heartbreaking. Informative. Eye-opening. Hopeful.
This novel offers an intimate look into OCD, social anxiety and depression. Amy, the main character who narrates this unforgettable novel, suffers with all of these. Amy holds down a full time job, has a home and maintains friendships. However, those around her don’t know the dark depths of her personal issues. They don’t understand the constant, mentally exhausting thoughts and concerns she struggles with every minute of every day.
This novel is extremely insightful but not heavy. It is written in a very relatable manner making Amy’s struggles vivid for the reader to grasp and understand. Fortunately, I do not have personal experience with these disorders, but I certainly felt the constant tension and stress for Amy while reading this book. I truly felt for Amy. The author does a phenomenal job pulling the reader into Amy’s mind and thought processes. Her constant worry and stress was extremely heartbreaking. Amy was a lovable character. I was deeply invested in her life and hoped she would get the help she needed to learn proper coping skills.
What I found most surprising was that Amy was fully aware of her inner struggles, yet couldn’t overcome them. She battled her own thoughts everyday in her mind. She knew what she was thinking wasn’t right, but didn’t have the coping skills to work past and overcome those thoughts.
Amy’s journey is one I won’t forget. Her story made me realize how extremely important and impactful a good support system is for those who have similar issues.
As sad as this novel is, it left me with a strong sense of hope for Amy and all who suffer like she does. I am thankful to have read and learned from this wonderful book! Thank you to the author for sending me a physical copy to read and review.
Insightful. Heartbreaking. Informative. Eye-opening. Hopeful.
This novel offers an intimate look into OCD, social anxiety and depression. Amy, the main character who narrates this unforgettable novel, suffers with all of these. Amy holds down a full time job, has a home and maintains friendships. However, those around her don’t know the dark depths of her personal issues. They don’t understand the constant, mentally exhausting thoughts and concerns she struggles with every minute of every day.
This novel is extremely insightful but not heavy. It is written in a very relatable manner making Amy’s struggles vivid for the reader to grasp and understand. Fortunately, I do not have personal experience with these disorders, but I certainly felt the constant tension and stress for Amy while reading this book. I truly felt for Amy. The author does a phenomenal job pulling the reader into Amy’s mind and thought processes. Her constant worry and stress was extremely heartbreaking. Amy was a lovable character. I was deeply invested in her life and hoped she would get the help she needed to learn proper coping skills.
What I found most surprising was that Amy was fully aware of her inner struggles, yet couldn’t overcome them. She battled her own thoughts everyday in her mind. She knew what she was thinking wasn’t right, but didn’t have the coping skills to work past and overcome those thoughts.
Amy’s journey is one I won’t forget. Her story made me realize how extremely important and impactful a good support system is for those who have similar issues.
As sad as this novel is, it left me with a strong sense of hope for Amy and all who suffer like she does. I am thankful to have read and learned from this wonderful book! Thank you to the author for sending me a physical copy to read and review.
August 31, 2021
I won this one in a Goodreads Giveaway. I took some time before reading it but am glad I finally picked it up. This is a relatively short (247 Kindle pages) novel about a young woman with OCD and depression. The protagonist is Amy, who is really struggling to keep her life going. She used to be happy and had a rich social life. During the previous few years however, her problems have intensified to the point where her social life has totally disappeared. Not only that, but it has become difficult for her to continue going to work everyday despite the facts that she loves her job and really enjoys her work colleagues. She can’t stand to be touched or to handle anything that doesn’t belong to her.
I’m not going to go into any more details for fear of approaching spoiler territory. I just have to say that I was not totally cognizant of how difficult it must be to live with OCD. To have that voice in your head that relentlessly controls your every move no matter what the rational part of your brain is trying to tell you. How frustrating to WANT to do things, to enjoy a normal life yet feel there is no way out of the prison constructed by that incessant chatter telling you what you must do. Add crippling depression on top of that and you have someone in big trouble.
This story is simply told. There is no huge plotline—it’s basically a character-driven story of Amy and her brain. The power of friendship is highlighted in this book. So is the mustering of power to keep going when all looks futile. Despite what one might think, the book is not entirely a downer. It is imbued with warmth, heart, and hope. It ends realistically and perfectly.
If you are looking for a quiet yet powerful little book that makes you think and you can read in 1-2 days, this may be one for you.
Thank you, Goodreads, for my copy of The Existence of Amy, which I won in a Goodreads Giveaway. Opinions are mine alone and are not biased in any way.
I’m not going to go into any more details for fear of approaching spoiler territory. I just have to say that I was not totally cognizant of how difficult it must be to live with OCD. To have that voice in your head that relentlessly controls your every move no matter what the rational part of your brain is trying to tell you. How frustrating to WANT to do things, to enjoy a normal life yet feel there is no way out of the prison constructed by that incessant chatter telling you what you must do. Add crippling depression on top of that and you have someone in big trouble.
This story is simply told. There is no huge plotline—it’s basically a character-driven story of Amy and her brain. The power of friendship is highlighted in this book. So is the mustering of power to keep going when all looks futile. Despite what one might think, the book is not entirely a downer. It is imbued with warmth, heart, and hope. It ends realistically and perfectly.
If you are looking for a quiet yet powerful little book that makes you think and you can read in 1-2 days, this may be one for you.
Thank you, Goodreads, for my copy of The Existence of Amy, which I won in a Goodreads Giveaway. Opinions are mine alone and are not biased in any way.
September 22, 2022
When I picked up Lana Grace Riva's debut novel, The Existence of Amy, I had no idea the profound and refreshing experience I was in for. This is a book that takes an unvarnished look at mental illness and its effects on both the individual and their loved ones. It is written in a brutally honest first-person voice that is at times difficult to read, but always deeply affecting.
What makes this book so special is the way it refuses to shy away from the ugly truths of mental illness. It is a story that dares to be audacious and raw, and in doing so it provides a powerful and much-needed voice to those who are often voiceless.
This is a book that needs to be read by everyone. It provides a unique and unflinching glimpse into the inner world of someone living with OCD, depression, and anxiety. It is a story of survival and hope, and it left me inspired and deeply moved. If you are looking for a book that will challenge your preconceptions and open your eyes to new perspectives, then I highly recommend you pick up The Existence of Amy.
What makes this book so special is the way it refuses to shy away from the ugly truths of mental illness. It is a story that dares to be audacious and raw, and in doing so it provides a powerful and much-needed voice to those who are often voiceless.
This is a book that needs to be read by everyone. It provides a unique and unflinching glimpse into the inner world of someone living with OCD, depression, and anxiety. It is a story of survival and hope, and it left me inspired and deeply moved. If you are looking for a book that will challenge your preconceptions and open your eyes to new perspectives, then I highly recommend you pick up The Existence of Amy.
September 21, 2019
What I particularly liked about this book is how author Lana Grace Riva has explored the topic about OCD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Many people suffer from OCD in different ways, that takes over the suffering persons life.
The challenge for Amy is every day tasks like traveling to work by bus, like she can't even press the bell to stop the bus or hold onto the pole to steady herself from the bus jolts. It's clear to Amy Do NOT TOUCH ANYTHING ON THIS BUS.
Amy has a job, which made me wonder with her OCD , how she was going to cope? Yes to us we would find her obsession with her desk and handbag a little odd.
But as I said some people have OCD in different forms. My partner thinks I have OCD when it comes to ironing. I have to iron my knickers, and every crease to any of my clothes has to be ironed to the point of perfect. I have to take a travel iron on holiday as I can not put any t-shirt or shorts on that have the slightest crease. I won't hire an iron as I love my own to use anytime I need it.
I was glued to this story as I wanted to find out what will become of Amy living with OCD as to Amy she has a normal life.
That's if you were to go by a definition of no immediate obvious indicators of peculiar, and you didn't know her very well. She has good friends, a good job, nice enough home. This normality, however, is precariously plastered on top of a different life. A life that is Amy's real life. The only one her brain will let her lead.
The challenge for Amy is every day tasks like traveling to work by bus, like she can't even press the bell to stop the bus or hold onto the pole to steady herself from the bus jolts. It's clear to Amy Do NOT TOUCH ANYTHING ON THIS BUS.
Amy has a job, which made me wonder with her OCD , how she was going to cope? Yes to us we would find her obsession with her desk and handbag a little odd.
But as I said some people have OCD in different forms. My partner thinks I have OCD when it comes to ironing. I have to iron my knickers, and every crease to any of my clothes has to be ironed to the point of perfect. I have to take a travel iron on holiday as I can not put any t-shirt or shorts on that have the slightest crease. I won't hire an iron as I love my own to use anytime I need it.
I was glued to this story as I wanted to find out what will become of Amy living with OCD as to Amy she has a normal life.
That's if you were to go by a definition of no immediate obvious indicators of peculiar, and you didn't know her very well. She has good friends, a good job, nice enough home. This normality, however, is precariously plastered on top of a different life. A life that is Amy's real life. The only one her brain will let her lead.
May 21, 2023
'...I'm still here. Still a live human being fumbling to cope with existence.'
Life for Amy is purely about existing. Existing for today, in the hope that tomorrow will be better. Maybe tomorrow she'll feel 'normal'. Amy persists because she knows what life was like before her mental health issues appeared and weighed her down, robbing her of time, fun, and friendships. 'I am simply scared. So. Very. Scared. All. The. Time.'
'The Existence of Amy' gives a real insight into the mind of a person who suffers from OCD and Depression. The short chapters and paragraphs seem to reflect Amy's chaotic and random thoughts as she pleads with her inner, irrational, voice to allow her to act 'normal'. As Amy navigates through everyday life, we are able to witness the impact her mental health has on her co-workers and friends as she tries to hide her struggles, for fear of rejection. Ironically, by masking her truth, Amy often creates more negativity to feed her depression. Amy needs to get the help she really needs in order to finally live.
I found this book illuminating. It reminded me that we don't often realise what people are going through 'behind the scenes'. We must therefore always strive to be kind, considerate, have patience and truly be a friend - not simply an acquaintance. The book also highlighted the way in which many of us inadvertently trivialise terms such as 'OCD' as a funny quirk instead of a true illness. I believe anyone who chose to read this book would get something back from it. Although it is fiction, it clearly reflects a personal journey.
Life for Amy is purely about existing. Existing for today, in the hope that tomorrow will be better. Maybe tomorrow she'll feel 'normal'. Amy persists because she knows what life was like before her mental health issues appeared and weighed her down, robbing her of time, fun, and friendships. 'I am simply scared. So. Very. Scared. All. The. Time.'
'The Existence of Amy' gives a real insight into the mind of a person who suffers from OCD and Depression. The short chapters and paragraphs seem to reflect Amy's chaotic and random thoughts as she pleads with her inner, irrational, voice to allow her to act 'normal'. As Amy navigates through everyday life, we are able to witness the impact her mental health has on her co-workers and friends as she tries to hide her struggles, for fear of rejection. Ironically, by masking her truth, Amy often creates more negativity to feed her depression. Amy needs to get the help she really needs in order to finally live.
I found this book illuminating. It reminded me that we don't often realise what people are going through 'behind the scenes'. We must therefore always strive to be kind, considerate, have patience and truly be a friend - not simply an acquaintance. The book also highlighted the way in which many of us inadvertently trivialise terms such as 'OCD' as a funny quirk instead of a true illness. I believe anyone who chose to read this book would get something back from it. Although it is fiction, it clearly reflects a personal journey.
dnf
May 31, 2024DNF at 41% :( I really wanted to love this book—a realistic look into someone's life with mental illness. The author was so kind to gift me a copy to read. While I was intrigued by Amy's day-to-day activities and work, unfortunately I didn't resonate with the narration style. There was more telling rather than showing, so I wasn't personally able to connect with Amy.
Again, thank you so much to Lana Grace Riva for sending me a copy of The Existence of Amy. As always, my reviews are one hundred percent voluntary and all opinions are my own :)
Again, thank you so much to Lana Grace Riva for sending me a copy of The Existence of Amy. As always, my reviews are one hundred percent voluntary and all opinions are my own :)
August 12, 2021
What an informative and innovative journey into the life of someone afflicted with OCD and depression. The book took a little time to adjust to. I went into this book without too much knowledge other than it dealt with Amy, who struggles with mental illness. The book is written from Amy's voice. The book opens with her challenge just to get up and get to work in the mornings. I felt like I was waiting for something big to happen before I realized that the book is exactly as the title describes. It is how Amy daily deals with and yearns to overcome her crippling OCD and depression while trying to put on a front of being "fine."
Once a co-worker realized she is in fact not fine, he (Ed) becomes an ally and someone who is able to read when she needs space at work. Her life revolves around her job. It is a job she loves and is good at, yet it is a struggle to get there and a challenge to constantly dodge attempts by co-workers to hang out after work. Her life is basically work, home, work, home. Anything outside of that routine makes her feel out of control and is too uncomfortable. The story follows her struggle to hide her mental illness and trying to avoid having to tell anyone about it..
She is surrounded by concerned co-workers and friends, but it is difficult for her to see past herself and her anxieties most of the time. I loved the sensitivity of so many of them, and felt cringy when some of them tried to "push" Amy. This was just such an honest, gritty portrayal of mental illness. The internal dialog she had with "her sickness" was amazing and so insightful. It helped me understand her illness on another level.
"I spend my life feeling as though I am precariously placed on an almost invisible line of safety, surrounded by harm in all directions. Maintaining this balance on this line is so far beyond the meaning of exhausting, no word exits for it. The temptation to let myself just fall swarms around me on a regular basis."
Amy hits a breaking point when Ed and his wife move to Singapore. When Amy is finally talked into going to a therapist by another one of her co-workers, her life slowly begins to transform. That was my favorite part of the story. The fact that mental illness is just that - an illness. One that most likely needs a trained doctor to treat. I loved the portrayal of the powerful effect professional therapy can have in helping to understand, and in turn change the way our minds process situations and information. There is hope, and there is relief.
This slow burn of a novel was full of emotion and I felt honored to have been given such an inside look into Amy's illness. Books like this further the mental illness conversation and lead to understanding struggles that not everyone faces. A read I recommend!
Once a co-worker realized she is in fact not fine, he (Ed) becomes an ally and someone who is able to read when she needs space at work. Her life revolves around her job. It is a job she loves and is good at, yet it is a struggle to get there and a challenge to constantly dodge attempts by co-workers to hang out after work. Her life is basically work, home, work, home. Anything outside of that routine makes her feel out of control and is too uncomfortable. The story follows her struggle to hide her mental illness and trying to avoid having to tell anyone about it..
She is surrounded by concerned co-workers and friends, but it is difficult for her to see past herself and her anxieties most of the time. I loved the sensitivity of so many of them, and felt cringy when some of them tried to "push" Amy. This was just such an honest, gritty portrayal of mental illness. The internal dialog she had with "her sickness" was amazing and so insightful. It helped me understand her illness on another level.
"I spend my life feeling as though I am precariously placed on an almost invisible line of safety, surrounded by harm in all directions. Maintaining this balance on this line is so far beyond the meaning of exhausting, no word exits for it. The temptation to let myself just fall swarms around me on a regular basis."
Amy hits a breaking point when Ed and his wife move to Singapore. When Amy is finally talked into going to a therapist by another one of her co-workers, her life slowly begins to transform. That was my favorite part of the story. The fact that mental illness is just that - an illness. One that most likely needs a trained doctor to treat. I loved the portrayal of the powerful effect professional therapy can have in helping to understand, and in turn change the way our minds process situations and information. There is hope, and there is relief.
This slow burn of a novel was full of emotion and I felt honored to have been given such an inside look into Amy's illness. Books like this further the mental illness conversation and lead to understanding struggles that not everyone faces. A read I recommend!
Read
August 3, 2022I just finished this and need to sit on my star rating for a bit. 💕
"I feel some level of sadness accompany me through all of my days, but it is sort of functioning sadness if that makes sense. I still manage to leave the house and go to work. Then there are periods though where it takes over."
"Anxiety seeps into every pore of my body and I stay still, completely rigid, any modicum of comfort that may have existed now harshly eradicated. Maniacally searching for some form of control over my environment."
In "The Existence of Amy" Riva takes the reader on a journey into the mind and life of a woman living with OCD, anxiety, and depression. It's an intimate portrayal of what it's like to live with mental illness. We follow Amy along throughout her days, as she navigates work, friendships and relationships, as well as difficult situations (sitting in chairs, using public toilets, being on an airplane). We then go along as she begins treatment and starts to get well! 🙏
This book is unlike anything I've read, and I think it's an important book about a very important, and underrepresented topic in literature.
At times the writing felt melancholic and monotonous, but as I reflect on that, it's from the POV of a person with severe depression. 🧐 Perhaps it's intended to be that way.
I recommend this book for people looking to learn more about mental illness from the perspective of someone going through it. Though the book is fiction, I suspect it is a quite authentic portrayal.
Thank you to the author for my gifted copy in exchange for my honest review. 💕
"I feel some level of sadness accompany me through all of my days, but it is sort of functioning sadness if that makes sense. I still manage to leave the house and go to work. Then there are periods though where it takes over."
"Anxiety seeps into every pore of my body and I stay still, completely rigid, any modicum of comfort that may have existed now harshly eradicated. Maniacally searching for some form of control over my environment."
In "The Existence of Amy" Riva takes the reader on a journey into the mind and life of a woman living with OCD, anxiety, and depression. It's an intimate portrayal of what it's like to live with mental illness. We follow Amy along throughout her days, as she navigates work, friendships and relationships, as well as difficult situations (sitting in chairs, using public toilets, being on an airplane). We then go along as she begins treatment and starts to get well! 🙏
This book is unlike anything I've read, and I think it's an important book about a very important, and underrepresented topic in literature.
At times the writing felt melancholic and monotonous, but as I reflect on that, it's from the POV of a person with severe depression. 🧐 Perhaps it's intended to be that way.
I recommend this book for people looking to learn more about mental illness from the perspective of someone going through it. Though the book is fiction, I suspect it is a quite authentic portrayal.
Thank you to the author for my gifted copy in exchange for my honest review. 💕
December 10, 2022
I received a gifted copy of this book to read in exchange for an honest review via the author.
The Existence of Amy is beautifully written story about Amy who suffers with OCD and depression. I was very drawn to this book when I saw it and when the author, Lana Grace Riva offered to send me a Reviewer copy I jumped at the chance. And I'm so glad I got the chance to read it. I could relate to Amy in so many ways being a sufferer of depression and anxiety myself. We see the good and bad days Amy goes through giving the reader an insight into mental health and the challengers sufferers of depression, anxiety and OCD go through daily. After a terrible year myself I smiled, found myself nodding away and even she'd a tear once or twice through such a strong connection to Amy's sufferings. I loved how Amy had some wonderful support around her as this is something that is extremely important to depression sufferers and is something I wish I had more of around myself. I highly recommend this book to everyone whether it be a sufferer of a mental health condition themselves or non-sufferers wanting more insight or information to understand it themselves. Well done Lana you did an amazing job!
The Existence of Amy is beautifully written story about Amy who suffers with OCD and depression. I was very drawn to this book when I saw it and when the author, Lana Grace Riva offered to send me a Reviewer copy I jumped at the chance. And I'm so glad I got the chance to read it. I could relate to Amy in so many ways being a sufferer of depression and anxiety myself. We see the good and bad days Amy goes through giving the reader an insight into mental health and the challengers sufferers of depression, anxiety and OCD go through daily. After a terrible year myself I smiled, found myself nodding away and even she'd a tear once or twice through such a strong connection to Amy's sufferings. I loved how Amy had some wonderful support around her as this is something that is extremely important to depression sufferers and is something I wish I had more of around myself. I highly recommend this book to everyone whether it be a sufferer of a mental health condition themselves or non-sufferers wanting more insight or information to understand it themselves. Well done Lana you did an amazing job!
May 24, 2021
For my full review, visit me at https://mrsbrownsbooks.wordpress.com/...
Don’t allow the minimal cover to put you off reading this powerful, moving account of a woman suffering. This is an emotional read and I found myself near tears at some points in the narrative, demonstrating just how provocative Amy’s story actually is.
Don’t allow the minimal cover to put you off reading this powerful, moving account of a woman suffering. This is an emotional read and I found myself near tears at some points in the narrative, demonstrating just how provocative Amy’s story actually is.
July 5, 2023
From the outside looking in, Amy has a perfectly good life: she has a job she enjoys, colleagues she gets along with and are actually her friends outside of work, and her own apartment - things are pretty good.
However, she often misses nights out with friends, and experiences long stretches where she'd rather isolate herself at home. Amy has OCD and depression, but she doesn't admit it to anyone for a while. She feels guilty for all her excuses, but the little voice in her head is telling her that it's protecting her by making her miss out.
Amy had the best support system in her friends, ever. Even though she didn't openly admit what she was going through for a long time, there was always someone in the group who had empathy and tried to understand that she was probably coming from a much deeper place than simply not wanting to go out.
I understood where Amy was coming from with her OCD, as I've experienced similar thoughts when I was younger: "if I do X thing, then something bad will happen, so I need to avoid it for my safety." and it could be something as simple as touching the faucet in a public bathroom, like Amy experienced. It's kind of hard to grasp if you haven't been through it, so I could also see where her friend, Sally, was coming from when she just thought Amy was being rude by declining invitations.
I think it's important for a reader to see all sides, because unfortunately not everyone will be understanding, especially when they don't exactly know or get what's going on in another person's head.
This book had a lot of wonderful characters that I will miss! I didn't expect to resonate so much with Amy; I'm so thankful to the author for my copy of this book to review!!
However, she often misses nights out with friends, and experiences long stretches where she'd rather isolate herself at home. Amy has OCD and depression, but she doesn't admit it to anyone for a while. She feels guilty for all her excuses, but the little voice in her head is telling her that it's protecting her by making her miss out.
Amy had the best support system in her friends, ever. Even though she didn't openly admit what she was going through for a long time, there was always someone in the group who had empathy and tried to understand that she was probably coming from a much deeper place than simply not wanting to go out.
I understood where Amy was coming from with her OCD, as I've experienced similar thoughts when I was younger: "if I do X thing, then something bad will happen, so I need to avoid it for my safety." and it could be something as simple as touching the faucet in a public bathroom, like Amy experienced. It's kind of hard to grasp if you haven't been through it, so I could also see where her friend, Sally, was coming from when she just thought Amy was being rude by declining invitations.
I think it's important for a reader to see all sides, because unfortunately not everyone will be understanding, especially when they don't exactly know or get what's going on in another person's head.
This book had a lot of wonderful characters that I will miss! I didn't expect to resonate so much with Amy; I'm so thankful to the author for my copy of this book to review!!
January 25, 2025
“why ruin today about a future that might never happen?”
a short, simple, but thought-provoking read. in this story, we get to know what goes inside an anxious mind. the contrast between Amy’s normal life and the one she lives within her mind serves as a representation of how this book deftly addresses serious mental health issues.
the first few pages set good expectations for me. although it merely follows Amy’s everyday routine (which can be pretty flat and boring), i still had the eagerness to explore her character more. the first chapters balanced her character so well, showing both good and unlikeable traits, and i was so willing to understand her like how i would patiently understand someone coping with mental health issues.
however, i feel like everything went downhill when she was caught up in an “almost” love affair with her co-worker. i really really really tried to be patient with her but she was just so .. unlikeable. i feel like the transition from being someone trying to silence the voices in their head to someone doing random, irrelevant ways not to ruin a man’s *happy* marriage was not properly organized. like it was a mere effect to some spice.
i appreciate the author gifting me this book in exchange for a review. i hope this book speaks to those who can actually relate to its intention.
a short, simple, but thought-provoking read. in this story, we get to know what goes inside an anxious mind. the contrast between Amy’s normal life and the one she lives within her mind serves as a representation of how this book deftly addresses serious mental health issues.
the first few pages set good expectations for me. although it merely follows Amy’s everyday routine (which can be pretty flat and boring), i still had the eagerness to explore her character more. the first chapters balanced her character so well, showing both good and unlikeable traits, and i was so willing to understand her like how i would patiently understand someone coping with mental health issues.
however, i feel like everything went downhill when she was caught up in an “almost” love affair with her co-worker. i really really really tried to be patient with her but she was just so .. unlikeable. i feel like the transition from being someone trying to silence the voices in their head to someone doing random, irrelevant ways not to ruin a man’s *happy* marriage was not properly organized. like it was a mere effect to some spice.
i appreciate the author gifting me this book in exchange for a review. i hope this book speaks to those who can actually relate to its intention.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 18, 2019
I was thrilled when this author contacted me to see if I would be interested in a copy of her book to review. Of course, I accepted and then the fear set in. What if I didn't like the book and I had to leave a review that was a bit sugar coated. I've always prided myself in being totally honest when providing my feedback. Thankfully, I can honestly say I truly enjoyed this book.
It was written in the first person, which is not a style I have read a lot of, but for this story it worked perfectly and drew me into Amy's world. This felt very much like reading a very personal diary which although you feel you shouldn't be reading has a naughtiness that keeps you hooked.
Amy suffers from OCD and Depression and her symptoms are so bad at times that she is restricted from living her life. She feels that she is simply watching life pass her by without being involved. She has some big obstacles to face when her job sends her to the other side of the world. A long haul flight is not something that her fears allow her to face easily, In fact, her fears seriously restrict even the most basic of daily routines.
Amy sinks to her lowest point when her friend announces that him and his wife are moving to Singapore. Amy feels alone and encases herself in her flat blocking out the world for weeks on end but what Amy is unaware of is that she doesn't have just one friend, She has a whole army of people there to support and help her.
I am thankful that I have never suffered with any kind of mental health issues but this book allowed me to see inside the mind of someone who does and I certainly feel it has given me a better understanding of how people that suffer with these illnesses must feel.
I would highly recommend this book. My only problem with it was that it had to end. I would love to know how Amy's story continues.
It was written in the first person, which is not a style I have read a lot of, but for this story it worked perfectly and drew me into Amy's world. This felt very much like reading a very personal diary which although you feel you shouldn't be reading has a naughtiness that keeps you hooked.
Amy suffers from OCD and Depression and her symptoms are so bad at times that she is restricted from living her life. She feels that she is simply watching life pass her by without being involved. She has some big obstacles to face when her job sends her to the other side of the world. A long haul flight is not something that her fears allow her to face easily, In fact, her fears seriously restrict even the most basic of daily routines.
Amy sinks to her lowest point when her friend announces that him and his wife are moving to Singapore. Amy feels alone and encases herself in her flat blocking out the world for weeks on end but what Amy is unaware of is that she doesn't have just one friend, She has a whole army of people there to support and help her.
I am thankful that I have never suffered with any kind of mental health issues but this book allowed me to see inside the mind of someone who does and I certainly feel it has given me a better understanding of how people that suffer with these illnesses must feel.
I would highly recommend this book. My only problem with it was that it had to end. I would love to know how Amy's story continues.
August 3, 2021
As an English teacher I could NOT get past the writing quality in this book. The grammar was rough (so many missing question marks and commas!), the way things were phrased often just didn’t make sense, dialogue was stilted, the vocabulary was limited and repetitive, adverbs were often shoehorned in, idioms were misused - e.g. “changed tact” instead of “changed tack”, and most problematically there was absolutely no showing, only telling. Essentially, all the things I ask my students to edit and improve when they do creative writing were present in this book, and I couldn’t get past it. I was itching to whip out my red pen and start marking it.
There’s a reason we tell kids to ‘show not tell’: we can’t empathise with and fully imagine a character if we’re not being shown how they’re feeling. I just didn’t care about Amy at all. I didn’t care about her ‘friends’. I didn’t care about their random trip to Australia. I didn’t care about their job. I didn’t care about her weird love life. The whole thing was just entirely two-dimensional and read more like a journal than a novel.
And that’s not because I’m not interested in books about mental health. I’ve read and very much enjoyed plenty of books about mental health. I very much appreciate what Riva has tried to do with this book, but it was just too ‘first draft’ for me, probably as a result of it being self-published. Still, if it speaks to others suffering with OCD, then that’s wonderful!
There’s a reason we tell kids to ‘show not tell’: we can’t empathise with and fully imagine a character if we’re not being shown how they’re feeling. I just didn’t care about Amy at all. I didn’t care about her ‘friends’. I didn’t care about their random trip to Australia. I didn’t care about their job. I didn’t care about her weird love life. The whole thing was just entirely two-dimensional and read more like a journal than a novel.
And that’s not because I’m not interested in books about mental health. I’ve read and very much enjoyed plenty of books about mental health. I very much appreciate what Riva has tried to do with this book, but it was just too ‘first draft’ for me, probably as a result of it being self-published. Still, if it speaks to others suffering with OCD, then that’s wonderful!
May 18, 2023
To all appearances, Amy should have a good life. She is competent at her job, has friends, her own apartment. However, appearances can be deceiving and underneath she is often paralyzed by OCD, anxiety, and depression.
This was an excellent read…quick ( I read it in two sittings) and engrossing with good insight into what it is like living behind the curtain of mental imbalance. Many readers will relate to some part of Amy’s story…so many of us have what we like to think of as “quirks” that really are anxieties of some kind. Imagine if those thoughts were to multiply, intensify, take over our lives. Amy, though, is incredibly fortunate to have some very supportive friends. Not everyone is that lucky; often they are met with impatience and rejection.
Don’t let the subject of mental health turn you off to this book. It is a compelling read and just may help others understand the struggles that some people face and how perhaps we can try to be there for them and assist them in finding help and hope. And, yes, there is hope.
This was an excellent read…quick ( I read it in two sittings) and engrossing with good insight into what it is like living behind the curtain of mental imbalance. Many readers will relate to some part of Amy’s story…so many of us have what we like to think of as “quirks” that really are anxieties of some kind. Imagine if those thoughts were to multiply, intensify, take over our lives. Amy, though, is incredibly fortunate to have some very supportive friends. Not everyone is that lucky; often they are met with impatience and rejection.
Don’t let the subject of mental health turn you off to this book. It is a compelling read and just may help others understand the struggles that some people face and how perhaps we can try to be there for them and assist them in finding help and hope. And, yes, there is hope.
September 29, 2019
This was a really good mental health book, which follows Amy and her experiences with OCD and depression.
I didn't know much going into this one as it was kindly sent over by the author, free, for review.
I have to admit that adult contemporary books aren't usually my thing but I quite enjoyed this one probably because there was a large focus on mental health.
I really saw myself in Amy. As someone who has lived with OCD and depression, I really felt for Amy and I definitely got a bit choked up at a couple of occasions.
The only problem I had with this book is that I wish there was more character development. Some of the characters felt a bit flat to me.
I also wish that it was a bit longer and we got to spend more time with Amy.
Overall though I really enjoyed this book. I think the representation is really good and I recommend it if you are looking for a mental health adult contemporary.
TW: depression, mentions of suicide and OCD
I didn't know much going into this one as it was kindly sent over by the author, free, for review.
I have to admit that adult contemporary books aren't usually my thing but I quite enjoyed this one probably because there was a large focus on mental health.
I really saw myself in Amy. As someone who has lived with OCD and depression, I really felt for Amy and I definitely got a bit choked up at a couple of occasions.
The only problem I had with this book is that I wish there was more character development. Some of the characters felt a bit flat to me.
I also wish that it was a bit longer and we got to spend more time with Amy.
Overall though I really enjoyed this book. I think the representation is really good and I recommend it if you are looking for a mental health adult contemporary.
TW: depression, mentions of suicide and OCD
January 28, 2022
The Existence of Amy is a powerful look into mental health and the challenges of balancing work, relationships, and everything in between.
Amy is trying to live a “normal” life, coping with OCD and depression; making excuses, feeling embarrassed, and suffering in silence. Luckily, she has more friends than she realizes and, though she may feel lonely, she’s not alone.
A precious reminder that everyone has their struggles, but also, that love is all around and help never too far away.
Thank you to the author for the gifted copy.
Amy is trying to live a “normal” life, coping with OCD and depression; making excuses, feeling embarrassed, and suffering in silence. Luckily, she has more friends than she realizes and, though she may feel lonely, she’s not alone.
A precious reminder that everyone has their struggles, but also, that love is all around and help never too far away.
Thank you to the author for the gifted copy.
January 16, 2021
This book was so deeply insightful and hopeful. The story is told by Amy, a seemingly normal girl who suffers desperately with OCD and depression, though disguises it well… until she doesn’t, because she can’t anymore. This was an easy read that felt real and intimate. It tackled the stigma against mental health wonderfully, I felt so sorry for Amy and her struggles. It really highlighted the importance of support and friendship, even when isolating yourself seems like the easiest option. I would highly recommend this book to everyone. It reminded me of Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine which I also thoroughly enjoyed. So if you liked that one, I’d recommend you read this!
A huge thank you to the amazing author who kindly sent me this book in exchange for an honest review 💙
A huge thank you to the amazing author who kindly sent me this book in exchange for an honest review 💙
March 4, 2022
I really loved getting to know Amy in this book, I’ve read numerous books that involve people living with mental health conditions and although these books are great and do shine a light on the different challenges people face, they don’t always come across as authentic to me, but this book really does nail what living with a mental health disorder can be like inside our heads. It’s a very honest, very authentic read that I would make anyone read. It doesn’t matter what situation you’re in, or how low or helpless you may feel, there is always help available to you and there will always be someone that wants to help you.
Thank you so much to the author for sending me a copy of this wonderful book in exchange for an honest review. If I could give it a million stars I would.
Thank you so much to the author for sending me a copy of this wonderful book in exchange for an honest review. If I could give it a million stars I would.
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July 8, 2022
Told from Amy’s point of view, The Existence of Amy showcases the many ways someone can struggle with their mental health. Amy has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and it affects every aspect of her life, personal and professional.
Not only do I have OCD but so does my younger daughter. Our triggers are completely different and my ability to cope is far more advanced given my age& life experiences. I only mention this because I think it gives me a unique perspective on a book that I found very relatable.
The writing was easy to read and I finished it in a day. Did the HEA ending make sense for the character? I thought so. Amy was fortunate to be surrounded by people who may not have known exactly what her difference was, but that she needed leeway’s. How nice would our world be if we all had friends like that?
Overall I enjoyed this book. Will every single person who suffers from OCD see themselves in Amy? No. OCD manifests in so many different ways and I think that awareness alone is important to highlight.
Not only do I have OCD but so does my younger daughter. Our triggers are completely different and my ability to cope is far more advanced given my age& life experiences. I only mention this because I think it gives me a unique perspective on a book that I found very relatable.
The writing was easy to read and I finished it in a day. Did the HEA ending make sense for the character? I thought so. Amy was fortunate to be surrounded by people who may not have known exactly what her difference was, but that she needed leeway’s. How nice would our world be if we all had friends like that?
Overall I enjoyed this book. Will every single person who suffers from OCD see themselves in Amy? No. OCD manifests in so many different ways and I think that awareness alone is important to highlight.
March 8, 2020
The Existence of Amy by Lana Grace Riva is a book that gives a fabulous insight to what living with OCD and depression is like.
Told from Amy's point of view, we really get inside her head and understand how her own brain is ruining her life.
Amy struggles to leave the house, use public transport and attend social events with work friends, even just going to the pub after work is a huge battle. It's not that she doesn't want to do these things. It's that her brain tells her it's not safe.
I have never suffered with OCD or depression myself so I cannot say if the book accurately describes what it is like. However I do believe this to be a good insight into what people with those conditions can experience (I'm assuming everyone's personal experience is different). The intrusive thoughts telling her she's not safe, not being able to shake hands with people, the inability some days to even get out of bed, not having the strength to leave the house.
Having OCD sounds exhausting. There are so many thoughts constantly running through Amy's head. The first few pages describe her morning routine and honestly I don't even know how she would do a full day's work after all that because I felt exhausted just reading about it.
The Existence of Amy is written in quite a blunt, to the point style. It's a short book at 273 pages and it's very much focused on Amy and her work friends, Sally, Ed and Nathan. At first Ed seems like the most supportive friend but towards the end Nathan really comes into his own and supports Amy.
I really enjoyed reading this book. I connected with Amy straight away, I enjoyed the way it was written, to the point and no flowery descriptions. I couldn't even tell you what the character looked like, I don't think there were any physical descriptions of them.
For a short book it certainly packs a punch and will have a lasting effect on me. The ending had me shedding more than a few tears and I felt sad the book was over and I would no longer be reading about Amy.
As I said earlier, I have no personal experience of conditions such as these but I do think it's important to learn about them, be it through fact or fiction. This book has definitely helped me to understand OCD better which is definitely a good thing.
I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn a little bit more about mental health issues or if they struggle themselves. I think a lot of people will get something from this book.
Told from Amy's point of view, we really get inside her head and understand how her own brain is ruining her life.
Amy struggles to leave the house, use public transport and attend social events with work friends, even just going to the pub after work is a huge battle. It's not that she doesn't want to do these things. It's that her brain tells her it's not safe.
I have never suffered with OCD or depression myself so I cannot say if the book accurately describes what it is like. However I do believe this to be a good insight into what people with those conditions can experience (I'm assuming everyone's personal experience is different). The intrusive thoughts telling her she's not safe, not being able to shake hands with people, the inability some days to even get out of bed, not having the strength to leave the house.
Having OCD sounds exhausting. There are so many thoughts constantly running through Amy's head. The first few pages describe her morning routine and honestly I don't even know how she would do a full day's work after all that because I felt exhausted just reading about it.
The Existence of Amy is written in quite a blunt, to the point style. It's a short book at 273 pages and it's very much focused on Amy and her work friends, Sally, Ed and Nathan. At first Ed seems like the most supportive friend but towards the end Nathan really comes into his own and supports Amy.
I really enjoyed reading this book. I connected with Amy straight away, I enjoyed the way it was written, to the point and no flowery descriptions. I couldn't even tell you what the character looked like, I don't think there were any physical descriptions of them.
For a short book it certainly packs a punch and will have a lasting effect on me. The ending had me shedding more than a few tears and I felt sad the book was over and I would no longer be reading about Amy.
As I said earlier, I have no personal experience of conditions such as these but I do think it's important to learn about them, be it through fact or fiction. This book has definitely helped me to understand OCD better which is definitely a good thing.
I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn a little bit more about mental health issues or if they struggle themselves. I think a lot of people will get something from this book.
February 26, 2022
[AD - Gifted]
‘The Existence of Amy’ is a raw and honest account of what it is like to live with OCD and depression.
The book follows Amy as she struggles with mundane yet challenging tasks; her interactions with the world and the people around her proving an insightful look into her struggling mind.
The reading experience was very uncomfortable at times, which, given the subject matter, is to be expected. The writing style makes the reader frel claustrophobic, reflecting how Amy feels on a day-to-day basis.
Although the topics dealt with were dark, there were some light and heartfelt moments, especially concerning Amy’s friends, who I just absolutely adored.
The only reason I couldn’t give this book five stars is that I didn’t always mesh with the writing style, but this is only a minor flaw and didn’t take away from the reading experience at all.
I would advise anyone who is thinking of picking this book up to do so with caution. Make sure that you are in the right mental space to cope with the topics being talked about.
⚠️ TRIGGER WARNINGS ⚠️
Depression, OCD, suicidal thoughts
— A huge thank you to the author for sending me a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review!
‘The Existence of Amy’ is a raw and honest account of what it is like to live with OCD and depression.
The book follows Amy as she struggles with mundane yet challenging tasks; her interactions with the world and the people around her proving an insightful look into her struggling mind.
The reading experience was very uncomfortable at times, which, given the subject matter, is to be expected. The writing style makes the reader frel claustrophobic, reflecting how Amy feels on a day-to-day basis.
Although the topics dealt with were dark, there were some light and heartfelt moments, especially concerning Amy’s friends, who I just absolutely adored.
The only reason I couldn’t give this book five stars is that I didn’t always mesh with the writing style, but this is only a minor flaw and didn’t take away from the reading experience at all.
I would advise anyone who is thinking of picking this book up to do so with caution. Make sure that you are in the right mental space to cope with the topics being talked about.
⚠️ TRIGGER WARNINGS ⚠️
Depression, OCD, suicidal thoughts
— A huge thank you to the author for sending me a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review!
July 26, 2021
Amy is your standard girl; holding down a job, having a good group of friends at work and occasionally going out to events and after work drinks. But inside Amy’s head reigns chaos. Her mind is a maelstrom of jumbling thoughts and terrifying anxieties and insecurities. Just the simplest task can involve a strenuous battle of wills to carry it out. This book is a glimpse inside her life and a snapshot of a woman carrying the weight of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
I enjoyed this book. It was incredibly easy to read, I read it in 24 hours such was the ease of being able to dip in and out of it. It’s a raw and unpolished book with a lot of dialogue and I do think more could be added it to it to enhance it, but I still really liked it. In fact the lack of polish made it seem more realistic, almost like a memoir.
It’s a fascinating glimpse into the real world of OCD. Very insightful and interesting.
Thanks to the author for providing me with a gifted copy. All views my own.
I enjoyed this book. It was incredibly easy to read, I read it in 24 hours such was the ease of being able to dip in and out of it. It’s a raw and unpolished book with a lot of dialogue and I do think more could be added it to it to enhance it, but I still really liked it. In fact the lack of polish made it seem more realistic, almost like a memoir.
It’s a fascinating glimpse into the real world of OCD. Very insightful and interesting.
Thanks to the author for providing me with a gifted copy. All views my own.
May 17, 2021
Relatable, Realistic, Engaging.
Throughout this book, I grew to love the character of Amy. I felt her situation was so completely relatable. Watching her character evolve throughout the story was very moving. Every part of this story felt completely realistic to me, it portrays a very real struggle (OCD/Depression) faced by people everyday. This story engaged me from beginning to end. I was completely satisfied with the ending of the story which for me is always the most important part. Getting to know the characters and see them developing relationships definitely grew both the storylines and characters for me. Reading about Amy's struggle really makes you realize that it's important to ask for help and that friends and family are two of the most important things in the world.
It was definitely a 5 ⭐ read for me.
Thank you to Lana Grace Riva for contacting me about the book. 🥰
Throughout this book, I grew to love the character of Amy. I felt her situation was so completely relatable. Watching her character evolve throughout the story was very moving. Every part of this story felt completely realistic to me, it portrays a very real struggle (OCD/Depression) faced by people everyday. This story engaged me from beginning to end. I was completely satisfied with the ending of the story which for me is always the most important part. Getting to know the characters and see them developing relationships definitely grew both the storylines and characters for me. Reading about Amy's struggle really makes you realize that it's important to ask for help and that friends and family are two of the most important things in the world.
It was definitely a 5 ⭐ read for me.
Thank you to Lana Grace Riva for contacting me about the book. 🥰
March 6, 2022
I was kindly given a copy of this book by the author because I work in mental health and have a passion for psychology.
Unfortunately, this book missed the mark for me. The writing style is simplistic and bland which made it difficult to feel hooked by the story. Ideally, Amy’s mental health difficulties would be portrayed in a more subtle, nuanced way instead of relying on stereotypes and ‘telling not showing’. Some paragraphs were overly descriptive (but lacked complex emotion) and had a repetitive nature.
I also found it hard to like Amy - although negative thinking styles are a characteristic of poor mental health, it would have been great if these were balanced out by some positive traits of Amy’s. I wanted to empathise and root for her! Overall, the book left me feeling heavy and frustrated but it’s a fast read.
Unfortunately, this book missed the mark for me. The writing style is simplistic and bland which made it difficult to feel hooked by the story. Ideally, Amy’s mental health difficulties would be portrayed in a more subtle, nuanced way instead of relying on stereotypes and ‘telling not showing’. Some paragraphs were overly descriptive (but lacked complex emotion) and had a repetitive nature.
I also found it hard to like Amy - although negative thinking styles are a characteristic of poor mental health, it would have been great if these were balanced out by some positive traits of Amy’s. I wanted to empathise and root for her! Overall, the book left me feeling heavy and frustrated but it’s a fast read.
February 9, 2023
What a lovely book. Thank you so much @lanagraceriva
For gifting me this book.
Sometimes people misconstrue others as being weird, or odd not knowing they have mental health issues like OCD, or maybe PTSD.
This book shows a side of someone who suffers from mental health issues.
Very eye opening.
⭐⭐⭐⭐
For gifting me this book.
Sometimes people misconstrue others as being weird, or odd not knowing they have mental health issues like OCD, or maybe PTSD.
This book shows a side of someone who suffers from mental health issues.
Very eye opening.
⭐⭐⭐⭐
February 12, 2020
Amy seems like a normal woman. She has a good job, loyal friends and a nice home. As you probably think, it’s everything that wants to achieve in life. However, the real life of Amy looks completely different. She lives how her brain allows her to and it’s making everything harder. She can’t fight it, even if she wants. It controls her life, relationships and moods. It’s hard for her to leave her apartments because it’s her safe place and outside waits for her a lot of hazards.
She’s good in hiding it from the world. Everyone thinks she’s kind of weird, but no one knows that there is something more than that. Her depression and OCD grow stronger. Thankfully, when it comes to the work trip to Australia, she’s able to fight it.
The doesn’t include any adventures or romances but it’s much more than that. It’s about the fight for life and happiness. It’s about a strong and unique friendship in the time it’s needed the most. It’s the story you’ve never heard before.
My thoughts
Reading this book was at some point very hard. The book was written in first person, so we have a complete view of her all thoughts. It’s so hard to imagine how people get through life with the mental illness. The easiest things we do on the daily basis are a real struggle for the people like this.
Amy is very weak, and she doesn’t even try to ask for help. She thinks that that’s how her life is, and it can’t be changed. She tries, because she wants it to be different, but her mental illness is so strong that it’s hard to push it away.
In the book is a lot of great characters that I would like to talk about. My favorite one is Natan, who develops a lot throughout the book. He doesn’t play a big part at the beginning but he’s one that at the end that stays with her and makes her life easier. Another one is Ed who’s her best friend. His character has two sides. He’s very caring but sometimes a little bit selfish and annoying. He wants the best for Amy but it’s hard for him to understand some aspects of her life.
The story is very original and deep. It’s one of the hardest books I read but surprisingly I read it in one day, because if you start you can’t put the book down. It’s worth reading just to understand the meaning of the effects obsessive-compulsive disorder and depression have.
I received the book from the author to honestly review the book. I had a few attempts to read this book but finally few days ago I sat down and read it at once. I am so glad that Lana Grace Riva contacted me and provided me one of the copies. It’s an amazing book that everyone should know about.
She’s good in hiding it from the world. Everyone thinks she’s kind of weird, but no one knows that there is something more than that. Her depression and OCD grow stronger. Thankfully, when it comes to the work trip to Australia, she’s able to fight it.
The doesn’t include any adventures or romances but it’s much more than that. It’s about the fight for life and happiness. It’s about a strong and unique friendship in the time it’s needed the most. It’s the story you’ve never heard before.
My thoughts
Reading this book was at some point very hard. The book was written in first person, so we have a complete view of her all thoughts. It’s so hard to imagine how people get through life with the mental illness. The easiest things we do on the daily basis are a real struggle for the people like this.
Amy is very weak, and she doesn’t even try to ask for help. She thinks that that’s how her life is, and it can’t be changed. She tries, because she wants it to be different, but her mental illness is so strong that it’s hard to push it away.
In the book is a lot of great characters that I would like to talk about. My favorite one is Natan, who develops a lot throughout the book. He doesn’t play a big part at the beginning but he’s one that at the end that stays with her and makes her life easier. Another one is Ed who’s her best friend. His character has two sides. He’s very caring but sometimes a little bit selfish and annoying. He wants the best for Amy but it’s hard for him to understand some aspects of her life.
The story is very original and deep. It’s one of the hardest books I read but surprisingly I read it in one day, because if you start you can’t put the book down. It’s worth reading just to understand the meaning of the effects obsessive-compulsive disorder and depression have.
I received the book from the author to honestly review the book. I had a few attempts to read this book but finally few days ago I sat down and read it at once. I am so glad that Lana Grace Riva contacted me and provided me one of the copies. It’s an amazing book that everyone should know about.
January 12, 2021
So, I wanted to firstly thank the author for gifting me a physical copy of this book earlier in 2020. I’m a little embarrassed that I’ve only got around to reading this at the end of 2020, but I felt that I had to prepare myself to read it and I definitely wasn’t wrong in that respect. While I wouldn’t necessarily say this book is “heavy”, it deals with mental health issues that, if you have experienced them yourself, could potentially be triggering.
CW/TW: Severe OCD, Anxiety, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts
When I finished reading this my feelings took time to settle because it ended up being quite an emotional read (I cried a million times, I’m an emotional reader what can I say?!). Riva paints a very raw portrayal of someone who lives with debilitating mental health issues and clearly illustrates how it affects every aspect of their life to the point that it doesn’t even feel like living anymore. To everyone, Amy leads a normal life with a good job she’s successful at and great friends. Maybe she comes across as weird or rude at times, but they don’t see anything ‘different’ about how she lives her life. Yet underneath the surface, Amy’s existence wouldn’t even be on the same stratosphere as what she projects to the public—nothing is even remotely ‘okay’.
This is a character driven story and there’s not much of a plot. It’s written in first person perspective so we get a very intimate look at Amy’s life with OCD, severe social anxiety and depression. Riva drew Amy in a very realistic and empathetic light. Even if you don’t know what it’s like to deal with these issues, you can clearly see and feel how hard she battles for control with her brain every single day. There are days when Amy feels hopeful and can get through the motions through sheer will and various coping mechanisms; but there are other days when everything becomes so debilitating that she’s unable to get out of bed or even form sentences. You watch as she feels these episodes creep up and as she desperately fights against being overwhelmed with little or no difference, and you see how her mental illness literally paralyzes her life.
Read my full review on my blog!
CW/TW: Severe OCD, Anxiety, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts
When I finished reading this my feelings took time to settle because it ended up being quite an emotional read (I cried a million times, I’m an emotional reader what can I say?!). Riva paints a very raw portrayal of someone who lives with debilitating mental health issues and clearly illustrates how it affects every aspect of their life to the point that it doesn’t even feel like living anymore. To everyone, Amy leads a normal life with a good job she’s successful at and great friends. Maybe she comes across as weird or rude at times, but they don’t see anything ‘different’ about how she lives her life. Yet underneath the surface, Amy’s existence wouldn’t even be on the same stratosphere as what she projects to the public—nothing is even remotely ‘okay’.
This is a character driven story and there’s not much of a plot. It’s written in first person perspective so we get a very intimate look at Amy’s life with OCD, severe social anxiety and depression. Riva drew Amy in a very realistic and empathetic light. Even if you don’t know what it’s like to deal with these issues, you can clearly see and feel how hard she battles for control with her brain every single day. There are days when Amy feels hopeful and can get through the motions through sheer will and various coping mechanisms; but there are other days when everything becomes so debilitating that she’s unable to get out of bed or even form sentences. You watch as she feels these episodes creep up and as she desperately fights against being overwhelmed with little or no difference, and you see how her mental illness literally paralyzes her life.
Read my full review on my blog!
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