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Forty-Seven Duology #1
Un Nouveau Départ à Quarante-Sept Ans (La Quarante-Sept Ans Dilogie t. 1)
I’m done hiding who I am.
Pretending to be straight, to be the loving, devoted husband and successful ER doctor everyone wanted me to be has been exhausting.
I numbed the pain any way I could, and in the end, it cost me everything. My job, my marriage, the relationship with my grown kids.
But now I’m clean, and for the first time, I’m living my true life as an out gay man.
I need to get my act together, to get healthy again. Benoni is my new personal trainer…twenty years my junior. He makes my mouth water and certain other body parts react. Oh, and he’s also my son’s best friend.
I’m forty-seven years old. It’s time for a clean start. But where does Benoni fit in?
Clean Start at Forty-Seven is part one of a duology, an emotional and yummy romance with an age gap, first time gay, loads of hurt/comfort, and the beginnings of a beautiful Daddy/boy relationship. It contains themes of addiction and religious homophobia.
Pretending to be straight, to be the loving, devoted husband and successful ER doctor everyone wanted me to be has been exhausting.
I numbed the pain any way I could, and in the end, it cost me everything. My job, my marriage, the relationship with my grown kids.
But now I’m clean, and for the first time, I’m living my true life as an out gay man.
I need to get my act together, to get healthy again. Benoni is my new personal trainer…twenty years my junior. He makes my mouth water and certain other body parts react. Oh, and he’s also my son’s best friend.
I’m forty-seven years old. It’s time for a clean start. But where does Benoni fit in?
Clean Start at Forty-Seven is part one of a duology, an emotional and yummy romance with an age gap, first time gay, loads of hurt/comfort, and the beginnings of a beautiful Daddy/boy relationship. It contains themes of addiction and religious homophobia.
310 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 12, 2022
203 people are currently reading
866 people want to read
About the author
Nora Phoenix
116 books2,157 followersWould you like the long or the short version of my bio?
The short? You got it.
I write steamy gay romance books and I love it. I also love reading books. Books are everything.
How was that?
A little more detail? Gotcha.
I started writing my first stories when I was a teen…on a freaking typewriter. I still have these, and they’re adorably romantic. And bad, haha. Fear of failing kept me from following my dream to become a romance author, so you can imagine how proud and ecstatic I am that I finally overcame my fears and self doubt and did it. I adore my genre because I love writing and reading about flawed, strong men who are just a tad broken..but find their happy ever after anyway.
My favorite books to read are pretty much all MM/gay romances as long as it has a happy end. Kink is a plus… Aside from that, I also read a lot of nonfiction and not just books on writing. Popular psychology is a favorite topic of mine and so are self help and sociology.
Hobbies? Ain’t nobody got time for that. Just kidding. I love traveling, spending time near the ocean, and hiking. But I love books more.
Come hang out with me in my Facebook Group Nora’s Nook where I share previews, sneak peeks, freebies, fun stuff, and much more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/noras...
Wanna get first dibs on freebies, updates, sales, and more? Sign up for my newsletter (no spamming your inbox full…promise!) here: http://www.noraphoenix.com/newsletter/
You can also stalk me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/NoraFromBHR
On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nora.phoenix/
On Bookbub: https://www.bookbub.com/profile/nora-...
The short? You got it.
I write steamy gay romance books and I love it. I also love reading books. Books are everything.
How was that?
A little more detail? Gotcha.
I started writing my first stories when I was a teen…on a freaking typewriter. I still have these, and they’re adorably romantic. And bad, haha. Fear of failing kept me from following my dream to become a romance author, so you can imagine how proud and ecstatic I am that I finally overcame my fears and self doubt and did it. I adore my genre because I love writing and reading about flawed, strong men who are just a tad broken..but find their happy ever after anyway.
My favorite books to read are pretty much all MM/gay romances as long as it has a happy end. Kink is a plus… Aside from that, I also read a lot of nonfiction and not just books on writing. Popular psychology is a favorite topic of mine and so are self help and sociology.
Hobbies? Ain’t nobody got time for that. Just kidding. I love traveling, spending time near the ocean, and hiking. But I love books more.
Come hang out with me in my Facebook Group Nora’s Nook where I share previews, sneak peeks, freebies, fun stuff, and much more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/noras...
Wanna get first dibs on freebies, updates, sales, and more? Sign up for my newsletter (no spamming your inbox full…promise!) here: http://www.noraphoenix.com/newsletter/
You can also stalk me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/NoraFromBHR
On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nora.phoenix/
On Bookbub: https://www.bookbub.com/profile/nora-...
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 262 reviews
January 14, 2022
Damn, this book was pretty good, but it had a few annoying aspects that ruined the reading pleasure for me.
I love age gap stories and a daddy/son theme is always a win for me, especially if the age roles are reversed.
Kinsey is actually an amazing character. He's a former ER doctor who is a recovering opioid addict and lost his job and his family over it, not to mention that he came out at age 47 after living a repressed life.
I feel quite sorry for him, because the author really gave him a lot to chew on. Ultraconservative Christian parents who do not accept his homosexuality, a wife who hates him, children who do not speak to him (whether due to his new-found sexuality or his addiction). He also lost the job he loved and the only thing that gave him purpose in life.
And now on top of everything else, he has this internalized religious homophobia inside his head that gives him feelings of guilt whenever he wants to act on his new freedom.
First of all, I want to applaud him.
He starts out in this book as a broken guy who just came out of rehab. Skinny, insecure and alone. His only contacts are his therapist and his rehab sponsor.
With the kind of baggage he dealt with, I am deeply impressed that he did not commit suicide. A guy like him who let his life be controlled by the expectations of his social environment for decades and who already failed them by resorting to drugs... Him coming out on the other end as a person who wants to be himself (a gay man) even though it will mean his social standing will be torn to shreds... As a guy who does not even have the support of his own children when he is the weakest in his life...
That seriously takes guts.
I guess some men would have taken the easy way out.
But Kinsey wants to get better and wants to find a new life where he can be himself. But his insecurities and his fears make it hard for him to find allies/friends.
The book starts out with Kinsey joining a small local gym where he discovers that his assigned personal trainer is a friend of his son's. And not only is young Benoni a strapping, muscled, 25 year old openly gay hunk. He's also the only one who has known for years that Kinsey was secretly gay.
Realizing Kinsey's shame and insecurities, Benoni makes it his mission to help Kinsey on his rocky road to happiness.
All in all, this plot sounds absolutely spectacular. I would usually be all over it.
But what didn't work for me here was Benoni. Mind you, his thoughts were great, he's a genuinely good character, but when he opens his mouth...
He seriously grated on my nerves the way he talked to Kinsey as if he were his therapist. Any dialogue with him felt so stilted and far fetched that I was waiting for Kinsey to ask him "Are you f***ing with me?" whenever Ben said something like "Thank you for bringing this to my attention." or "I'm sorry, I did not word this right. Let me rephrase that." Or even worse: "What kind of literature can you recommend to educate myself on the topic."
Also, and I just need to say it: I did not like Ben's roommate Leif.
I admit, the idea to have a character who does porn at home for onlyfans is interesting. I'd love to read a romance with such a theme.
But Leif? Come on, that guy is deeply insecure, craving strong guidance and needs his roommate to discipline him just so he can adhere to a daily routine?
And he - of all people - does porn for a living, inviting strangers into his and Ben's home to film himself having sex with them for money?
And Ben just... I don't know...washes the dishes while the red light is on above Leif's room when he's filming a scene, hoping that the stranger doesn't unhinge Leif's fragile sensibilities?
Maybe I'm being prude, but that's so crazy to me.
And Ben just accepts everything and empowers everyone around him, no matter the crazy shit they do, because that's his self-chosen role as the world's therapist.
It's really a pity, because I found Ben very interesting. If only he acted a bit more like a regular guy and less like a medical professional treating a patient.
And finally: Nonstraight. I never heard that word before, but after this book, it is fried into my brain. It was used a dozen times by all characters.
Also, there was so much info dumping in this book... Kinsey talking to his son (who is an ER nurse) sounded like reciting a medical textbook...
Definitely a wonderful set up, but it did not live up to my expectations.
3 stars!
I love age gap stories and a daddy/son theme is always a win for me, especially if the age roles are reversed.
Kinsey is actually an amazing character. He's a former ER doctor who is a recovering opioid addict and lost his job and his family over it, not to mention that he came out at age 47 after living a repressed life.
I feel quite sorry for him, because the author really gave him a lot to chew on. Ultraconservative Christian parents who do not accept his homosexuality, a wife who hates him, children who do not speak to him (whether due to his new-found sexuality or his addiction). He also lost the job he loved and the only thing that gave him purpose in life.
And now on top of everything else, he has this internalized religious homophobia inside his head that gives him feelings of guilt whenever he wants to act on his new freedom.
First of all, I want to applaud him.
He starts out in this book as a broken guy who just came out of rehab. Skinny, insecure and alone. His only contacts are his therapist and his rehab sponsor.
With the kind of baggage he dealt with, I am deeply impressed that he did not commit suicide. A guy like him who let his life be controlled by the expectations of his social environment for decades and who already failed them by resorting to drugs... Him coming out on the other end as a person who wants to be himself (a gay man) even though it will mean his social standing will be torn to shreds... As a guy who does not even have the support of his own children when he is the weakest in his life...
That seriously takes guts.
I guess some men would have taken the easy way out.
But Kinsey wants to get better and wants to find a new life where he can be himself. But his insecurities and his fears make it hard for him to find allies/friends.
The book starts out with Kinsey joining a small local gym where he discovers that his assigned personal trainer is a friend of his son's. And not only is young Benoni a strapping, muscled, 25 year old openly gay hunk. He's also the only one who has known for years that Kinsey was secretly gay.
Realizing Kinsey's shame and insecurities, Benoni makes it his mission to help Kinsey on his rocky road to happiness.
All in all, this plot sounds absolutely spectacular. I would usually be all over it.
But what didn't work for me here was Benoni. Mind you, his thoughts were great, he's a genuinely good character, but when he opens his mouth...
He seriously grated on my nerves the way he talked to Kinsey as if he were his therapist. Any dialogue with him felt so stilted and far fetched that I was waiting for Kinsey to ask him "Are you f***ing with me?" whenever Ben said something like "Thank you for bringing this to my attention." or "I'm sorry, I did not word this right. Let me rephrase that." Or even worse: "What kind of literature can you recommend to educate myself on the topic."
Also, and I just need to say it: I did not like Ben's roommate Leif.
I admit, the idea to have a character who does porn at home for onlyfans is interesting. I'd love to read a romance with such a theme.
But Leif? Come on, that guy is deeply insecure, craving strong guidance and needs his roommate to discipline him just so he can adhere to a daily routine?
And he - of all people - does porn for a living, inviting strangers into his and Ben's home to film himself having sex with them for money?
And Ben just... I don't know...washes the dishes while the red light is on above Leif's room when he's filming a scene, hoping that the stranger doesn't unhinge Leif's fragile sensibilities?
Maybe I'm being prude, but that's so crazy to me.
And Ben just accepts everything and empowers everyone around him, no matter the crazy shit they do, because that's his self-chosen role as the world's therapist.
It's really a pity, because I found Ben very interesting. If only he acted a bit more like a regular guy and less like a medical professional treating a patient.
And finally: Nonstraight. I never heard that word before, but after this book, it is fried into my brain. It was used a dozen times by all characters.
Also, there was so much info dumping in this book... Kinsey talking to his son (who is an ER nurse) sounded like reciting a medical textbook...
Definitely a wonderful set up, but it did not live up to my expectations.
3 stars!
June 9, 2022
I’m not gonna lie and say this was the easiest book for me but I think that was kinda the point.
Like my bestie Jessi told me, this is one of the slowest slow burns and hell, she wasn’t kidding. Good Lord, it was almost as dull as watching paint dry at some points. Sorry, not sorry.
Yet even though I wasn’t the biggest fan of all the religious undertone, it’s a subject manner that needs to be tackled.
I felt so bad for Kinsey, I can’t imagine being stifled, ashamed and unhappy for that long. I am in awe of his bravery to finally be his true self, no matter how much hate he would get in return.
But Ben? He’s my guy, I love him to pieces. He’s such a lovely soul. His relationship with Leif is interesting and sweet. What he went through with his mom brought me to tears.
Even though my patience was worn super thin, I do believe it was worth the wait. That first kiss and what followed was everything.
I just hope the second half of this duology is an easier read. And by the little bit of steam I got here, I’m hoping I get way more of that.
Like my bestie Jessi told me, this is one of the slowest slow burns and hell, she wasn’t kidding. Good Lord, it was almost as dull as watching paint dry at some points. Sorry, not sorry.
Yet even though I wasn’t the biggest fan of all the religious undertone, it’s a subject manner that needs to be tackled.
I felt so bad for Kinsey, I can’t imagine being stifled, ashamed and unhappy for that long. I am in awe of his bravery to finally be his true self, no matter how much hate he would get in return.
But Ben? He’s my guy, I love him to pieces. He’s such a lovely soul. His relationship with Leif is interesting and sweet. What he went through with his mom brought me to tears.
Even though my patience was worn super thin, I do believe it was worth the wait. That first kiss and what followed was everything.
I just hope the second half of this duology is an easier read. And by the little bit of steam I got here, I’m hoping I get way more of that.
February 19, 2022
……….😐
so I went into this blindly. Not sure that was a good idea.
I wanted smexy smutty goodness. I mean
Older sub x younger dom
grumpy silver fox
Slow-fucking-burn
Kind of gay awakening but not really
Son’s best friend
Potential daddy / boy kink
I just wanted some sex guys, but this was so sweet and tender. Ugh.
You’re safe.
You’re valid.
You’re loved.
And it wasn’t even the ”aw, okay; moving on” sort of sweet sometime. It, at some moments, got so boring. And flat. And dull.
But I’m not a quitter. I’m going into the next one. Luck me wish
so I went into this blindly. Not sure that was a good idea.
I wanted smexy smutty goodness. I mean
Older sub x younger dom
grumpy silver fox
Slow-fucking-burn
Kind of gay awakening but not really
Son’s best friend
Potential daddy / boy kink
I just wanted some sex guys, but this was so sweet and tender. Ugh.
You’re safe.
You’re valid.
You’re loved.
And it wasn’t even the ”aw, okay; moving on” sort of sweet sometime. It, at some moments, got so boring. And flat. And dull.
But I’m not a quitter. I’m going into the next one. Luck me wish
February 10, 2022
Edited to add… the fact that people are rating this low because of the religious themes clearly didn’t read the several pages at the beginning of this book stating what was ahead. Those low ratings are not an accurate reflection of a really beautiful book. If religion isn’t your thing, DON’T READ IT.
I’ll leave a full review after I’m done with the 2nd but…
This book is REALLY special. I understand that a lot of this is based off of Nora’s own experiences, and that this book is as a bit of a purge for her. I worried that it wouldn’t translate well… but she really took the time to take this religiously traumatized gay man and worked through the long process of acceptance. Which still isn’t fully there by the end of this book. But it got so far. Ya’ll know how I want steam in my books but the lack of it makes the wait for it even better. I’m just so happy she didn’t do what a lot of authors do, and made a magical dick make his problems disappear. It’s so rare for an author to really take the time to work through trauma while also developing a really sweet and intense friendship and relationship. I’m just so thankful for her attention to developing people and a story properly. I have a feeling by the time I’m done with the second these men will be embedded in my heart.
PLEASE HEED THE TRIGGER WARNINGS: heavy heavy HEAVY extreme religious indoctrination and trauma, hardcore homophobia, internalized homophobia, terminal illness and death, and addiction (actual active addiction is off page though).
I’ll leave a full review after I’m done with the 2nd but…
This book is REALLY special. I understand that a lot of this is based off of Nora’s own experiences, and that this book is as a bit of a purge for her. I worried that it wouldn’t translate well… but she really took the time to take this religiously traumatized gay man and worked through the long process of acceptance. Which still isn’t fully there by the end of this book. But it got so far. Ya’ll know how I want steam in my books but the lack of it makes the wait for it even better. I’m just so happy she didn’t do what a lot of authors do, and made a magical dick make his problems disappear. It’s so rare for an author to really take the time to work through trauma while also developing a really sweet and intense friendship and relationship. I’m just so thankful for her attention to developing people and a story properly. I have a feeling by the time I’m done with the second these men will be embedded in my heart.
PLEASE HEED THE TRIGGER WARNINGS: heavy heavy HEAVY extreme religious indoctrination and trauma, hardcore homophobia, internalized homophobia, terminal illness and death, and addiction (actual active addiction is off page though).
March 27, 2024
You get a DNF and YOU get a DNF. EVERYBODY GETS A DNFFFFFF!
DNF @ 14%
Yeah, the way this book is going is just making me uncomfortable with the amount of 2nd hand embarrassment, so I'm not going to force it.
DNF @ 14%
Yeah, the way this book is going is just making me uncomfortable with the amount of 2nd hand embarrassment, so I'm not going to force it.
January 12, 2022
A Joyfully Jay review.
4.5 stars
This book is the first in a duology and only the start of Kinsey and Benoni’s story. This story focuses heavily on Kinsey’s journey. He’s out of rehab and has a sponsor he trusts, and he’s working on his health, both physical and mental. Phoenix does a really good job handling the weight of the topics in this book. And there’s a lot going on here, especially in regards to internalized homophobia and religious trauma. Kinsey was raised in an evangelical Christian home and the scars of that upbringing run deep. A knee injury resulted in pain pills, and the pain he was dealing with mentally as well as physically made it all too easy to come to rely on the opioids. Kinsey’s story is one of heartbreak, but he’s resilient in a way that’s uplifting. And even though he’s doing the work to become well, it doesn’t lessen the fact that he’s got a long way to go.
Read Kris’ review in its entirety here.
4.5 stars
This book is the first in a duology and only the start of Kinsey and Benoni’s story. This story focuses heavily on Kinsey’s journey. He’s out of rehab and has a sponsor he trusts, and he’s working on his health, both physical and mental. Phoenix does a really good job handling the weight of the topics in this book. And there’s a lot going on here, especially in regards to internalized homophobia and religious trauma. Kinsey was raised in an evangelical Christian home and the scars of that upbringing run deep. A knee injury resulted in pain pills, and the pain he was dealing with mentally as well as physically made it all too easy to come to rely on the opioids. Kinsey’s story is one of heartbreak, but he’s resilient in a way that’s uplifting. And even though he’s doing the work to become well, it doesn’t lessen the fact that he’s got a long way to go.
Read Kris’ review in its entirety here.
January 31, 2022
The writing is a little stiff and it took me a while to get into this, but then once I did, I really liked it.
Super slow burn
Age gap
Son’s best friend
BDSM light (nothing happens here, but it has young daddy, older boy vibes)
Recovering addict
Religious trauma
It’s a lot, but it was really sweet and enjoyable.
Loved:
- flashbacks from the 90s. They really helped me understand Kinsey and they broke my heart. I can’t imagine growing up like that, and it breaks my heart knowing it still happens
- the secondary characters, especially Jonathan
- the interactions between Ben and his friends, including Leif
Didn’t love:
- the interactions between the two MCs often felt awkward and fake. Nobody talks like that. 🤷♀️
Will definitely read the second book, I need to see the sexual BDSM fun after all this UST!
Super slow burn
Age gap
Son’s best friend
BDSM light (nothing happens here, but it has young daddy, older boy vibes)
Recovering addict
Religious trauma
It’s a lot, but it was really sweet and enjoyable.
Loved:
- flashbacks from the 90s. They really helped me understand Kinsey and they broke my heart. I can’t imagine growing up like that, and it breaks my heart knowing it still happens
- the secondary characters, especially Jonathan
- the interactions between Ben and his friends, including Leif
Didn’t love:
- the interactions between the two MCs often felt awkward and fake. Nobody talks like that. 🤷♀️
Will definitely read the second book, I need to see the sexual BDSM fun after all this UST!
January 13, 2022
Good story with well-written characters. I liked the heroes and I'm enjoying Kinsey's journey of self discovery, healing and being true to himself. Ben is definitely the right man for him and I like the story they have to tell. I HATE ending on a cliffhanger and I really hate having to wait until February to see the conclusion.
4.25 stars
PS...I hope Leif gets his own story too.
4.25 stars
PS...I hope Leif gets his own story too.
June 21, 2024
dnf at 9%
Not only am I a tad bit weirded out by the fact that the older guy, Kinsey was semi-attracted to Ben, his son's best friend, when he was 18, I also hate how everything that comes out of Ben's mouth is essentially therapist speak😭😭 like I'm not about that, please and thank you!
Not only am I a tad bit weirded out by the fact that the older guy, Kinsey was semi-attracted to Ben, his son's best friend, when he was 18, I also hate how everything that comes out of Ben's mouth is essentially therapist speak😭😭 like I'm not about that, please and thank you!
May 11, 2022
I like the plot and the characters. There are so many issues that are raised and Kinsey really has a lot to overcome. The problem for me was the dialogue. It often felt like I was being educated under the guise of these two having a conversation. I could understand it some of the time as Kinsey is new to a lot of things and was sheltered and closeted for so long, but there were just too many of them and it just felt inauthentic after a while.
I am moving on to the next book as I do like the plot and would like to see how Kinsey and his family deal with what is happening, and how the relationship blooms. I'm just hoping they start talking to each other as actual human beings and not informational pamphlets.
I am moving on to the next book as I do like the plot and would like to see how Kinsey and his family deal with what is happening, and how the relationship blooms. I'm just hoping they start talking to each other as actual human beings and not informational pamphlets.
April 8, 2022
This was... way too overly explained. Like.. painfully over explained.
3 stars
1 on the spice scale
3 stars
1 on the spice scale
November 6, 2023
I'm really, really glad I read the two books out of order. If I hadn't, I'm not sure I could have brought myself to have ever read the second book. I hated the stress and angst in this one...and would have been on edge the entire time wondering if all this turmoil would ever be resolved before the book ended. I loved Kinsey and Benoni, especially Benoni. Kinsey is 22 years older than Benoni and Benoni is Kinsey's son's best friend. Fate and good common sense say they should never be a good fit, and yet...they are. Nora Phoenix never lets her readers down. We have Kinsey who is an addict from drugs taken from an injury. He's a former ER doctor, only recently out as gay and divorced. He struggles a lot with his extremist religious up bringing, which was way over the top infuriating, judgmental and unforgiving on his parents and his grandfather's part. The poor man was beyond helpless trying to straighten out a life that never needed straightening out to begin with. He was a sad, awkward, self-deprecating, virgin that just needed someone to tell him that his God loved him no matter what the hypocrites pushed down his young throat. From the start I was 100% committed to Kinsey and to their future happiness. Kinsey and Benoni's romance and friendship will touch your heart!
February 10, 2022
Finding your true self is hard when you are young but after you have lived almost half of your life trying to be someone else it is hard to break those binds that once tied you. Kinsey seemingly had the perfect house with the perfect wife, kids and job but he was never happy. He always had these urges that he was taught was wrong, but it isn't until he goes down a terrible path that he realizes it is time for him to be exactly who he always was. It won't be easy; it will take time for Kinsey to see that he is worthy of his true self even if those people he loves dearly can't see it.
Benoni never expected to be training his friends dad but with that comes so much more. It comes with friendship and feelings that Ben didn't know he could have for another person. Navigating this friendship is going to be difficult, Kinsey is still fragile from the trauma he has endured his whole life and one wrong move could have him running before things even begin.
This book was difficult. It had the beautiful hurt/comfort moments I love to read about but reading about Kinsey's past and the things he was taught to believe broke my heart. Several members of my family feel a certain way about the queer community and seeing those feelings in words made me angry. Love is love and it is not our job to make people feel like living their life their way is wrong. It is our job to love them, help them feel secure in themselves and encourage them to be everything they want to be. This was a slow burn, seriously slow but it worked. If it would have been any faster, it would have seemed forced, and Benoni & Kinsey deserved more.
After the emotions I felt with this book I am hoping that with book two we get to see a lighter side to Kinsey and him living the life he has always deserved.
Benoni never expected to be training his friends dad but with that comes so much more. It comes with friendship and feelings that Ben didn't know he could have for another person. Navigating this friendship is going to be difficult, Kinsey is still fragile from the trauma he has endured his whole life and one wrong move could have him running before things even begin.
This book was difficult. It had the beautiful hurt/comfort moments I love to read about but reading about Kinsey's past and the things he was taught to believe broke my heart. Several members of my family feel a certain way about the queer community and seeing those feelings in words made me angry. Love is love and it is not our job to make people feel like living their life their way is wrong. It is our job to love them, help them feel secure in themselves and encourage them to be everything they want to be. This was a slow burn, seriously slow but it worked. If it would have been any faster, it would have seemed forced, and Benoni & Kinsey deserved more.
After the emotions I felt with this book I am hoping that with book two we get to see a lighter side to Kinsey and him living the life he has always deserved.
February 23, 2022
Ultimate DILF
Kinsey and Benoni’s story.
Oh this broke my heart. Kinsey’s really had a number done on him by religion and those in his life who love their religion more than they love him. For all his adult life he’s denied himself and his sexuality and lived a life full of shame and confusion believing there was something wrong and sinful with him for having homosexual thoughts and tendencies. When Kinsey finally takes ownership for his life’s choices he loses his family. So sad.
This is an age gap which I love with daddy kink or rather a mention of domestic discipline than actual kink. This is a sweet slow burn which it needed to be to suit their story. Hopefully Kinsey can be freed from the sense of guilt and sin he feels and be able to experience all his life can offer him without shame. This is book one of a two book series.
Kinsey and Benoni’s story.
Oh this broke my heart. Kinsey’s really had a number done on him by religion and those in his life who love their religion more than they love him. For all his adult life he’s denied himself and his sexuality and lived a life full of shame and confusion believing there was something wrong and sinful with him for having homosexual thoughts and tendencies. When Kinsey finally takes ownership for his life’s choices he loses his family. So sad.
This is an age gap which I love with daddy kink or rather a mention of domestic discipline than actual kink. This is a sweet slow burn which it needed to be to suit their story. Hopefully Kinsey can be freed from the sense of guilt and sin he feels and be able to experience all his life can offer him without shame. This is book one of a two book series.
January 13, 2022
Mixed Bag
Kind of struggling with rating this. Loved the characters, loved the care and story but the "preaching" (for lack of a better word) got to be way too much. It almost feels unfair to say that because in many ways it was important to the story, but it was just too often and too much. That said, I still intend to read the second book because I do like the characters...just not eager for the book like I might usually be.
Kind of struggling with rating this. Loved the characters, loved the care and story but the "preaching" (for lack of a better word) got to be way too much. It almost feels unfair to say that because in many ways it was important to the story, but it was just too often and too much. That said, I still intend to read the second book because I do like the characters...just not eager for the book like I might usually be.
January 16, 2022
Not ready to review yet.. will 🔜
January 20, 2022
Hits close to home
Kinsey's story hits really close to home for me. I can really identify with some of his feelings. I can't wait for the next book.
Kinsey's story hits really close to home for me. I can really identify with some of his feelings. I can't wait for the next book.
July 16, 2024
This one was another rough one for me. There was so much inner dialogue in this one I wanted to scream. And then we have the back and forth between the past and present made me want to throw my iPad across the room.
While I can appreciate how much Kinsey needed a Ben in his life, he was just so needy. Like over the top needy. I get he has an addiction, and trust me I get religious trama, but damn this book just couldn't move past it. And that right there is probably my issue.
Hopefully the next book moves forward more and doesn't focus so much on that. We've already had 250 pages of it.
While I can appreciate how much Kinsey needed a Ben in his life, he was just so needy. Like over the top needy. I get he has an addiction, and trust me I get religious trama, but damn this book just couldn't move past it. And that right there is probably my issue.
Hopefully the next book moves forward more and doesn't focus so much on that. We've already had 250 pages of it.
February 10, 2023
Whaouuuh, ce n'est pas du tout ce à quoi je m'attendais, je pensais que ça allait être léger mais pas du tout !
Kinsey a 47 ans et ça fait un an qu'il vit comme l'homme gay libéré qu'il aurait dû être depuis des années. Il sort de cure de désintoxication et d'un mariage de +25 ans avec une femme, il doit se remettre en forme que ce soit physiquement ou mentalement. Et son nouvel entraîneur n'est pas un inconnu, c'est Benino, l'un des amis trop de son fils de 25 ans... Un peu trop sexy !
Ce premier tome de cette duologie est basé sur l'évolution de la relation entre Kinsey et Benino, la découverte du personnage complexe qu'est Kinsey et pourquoi il est resté si longtemps dans le placard. Il parle d'homophobie religieuse et comme il est possible de briser un homme jusqu'à l'encrer dans son cerveau. Nora Phoenix a fait fort avec cette série, c'est si juste, si poignant et si dur que j'ai eu plusieurs fois les larmes aux yeux...
Et Benino, c'est vraiment la personne parfaite pour soutenir Kinsey et lui apporter des réponses à toutes ses questions mais il va lui permettre de ne plus prendre toutes les responsabilités sur le dos pour et avoir quelqu'un qui prendra soit de lui.
C'est alors une relation dominant/soumis particulière qui va voir le jour. Tout est si logique, tout est clair et tout est si limpide que la différence d'âge ne me paraissait plus si grande.
Bref, j'ai beaucoup aimé ce premier tome, mais est-ce surprenant pour un livre de Nora Phoenix !
Kinsey a 47 ans et ça fait un an qu'il vit comme l'homme gay libéré qu'il aurait dû être depuis des années. Il sort de cure de désintoxication et d'un mariage de +25 ans avec une femme, il doit se remettre en forme que ce soit physiquement ou mentalement. Et son nouvel entraîneur n'est pas un inconnu, c'est Benino, l'un des amis trop de son fils de 25 ans... Un peu trop sexy !
Ce premier tome de cette duologie est basé sur l'évolution de la relation entre Kinsey et Benino, la découverte du personnage complexe qu'est Kinsey et pourquoi il est resté si longtemps dans le placard. Il parle d'homophobie religieuse et comme il est possible de briser un homme jusqu'à l'encrer dans son cerveau. Nora Phoenix a fait fort avec cette série, c'est si juste, si poignant et si dur que j'ai eu plusieurs fois les larmes aux yeux...
Et Benino, c'est vraiment la personne parfaite pour soutenir Kinsey et lui apporter des réponses à toutes ses questions mais il va lui permettre de ne plus prendre toutes les responsabilités sur le dos pour et avoir quelqu'un qui prendra soit de lui.
C'est alors une relation dominant/soumis particulière qui va voir le jour. Tout est si logique, tout est clair et tout est si limpide que la différence d'âge ne me paraissait plus si grande.
Bref, j'ai beaucoup aimé ce premier tome, mais est-ce surprenant pour un livre de Nora Phoenix !
February 11, 2024
Nora Phoenix is the kind of author who will break your heart while holding your hand, telling you things will be okay. So far I haven’t read any other author who writes hurt / comfort as well as she does.
This book had me reading until 3 am and I couldn’t stop crying after finishing it, it’s such a raw, powerful and beautiful story about self discovering, recovering and healing.
The glimpses into Kinseys past are heartbreaking, but I feel like the author handles the triggering subjects really well. The past is a big part of Kinsley’s struggles and the glimpses offer a deep insight into his traumatic past and everything he’s had to overcome so far.
The chemistry between Ben and Kinsley is palpable, and I adore them together. Ben is so wise and mature for his age and I love how natural his dominance is. It’s a slow burn as they build up their friendship, but the pace felt perfect for them, and they share so many sweet and tender moments.
The ending left me longing and I can’t wait to read more of Ben and Kinsley’ story in the next book!
This book had me reading until 3 am and I couldn’t stop crying after finishing it, it’s such a raw, powerful and beautiful story about self discovering, recovering and healing.
The glimpses into Kinseys past are heartbreaking, but I feel like the author handles the triggering subjects really well. The past is a big part of Kinsley’s struggles and the glimpses offer a deep insight into his traumatic past and everything he’s had to overcome so far.
The chemistry between Ben and Kinsley is palpable, and I adore them together. Ben is so wise and mature for his age and I love how natural his dominance is. It’s a slow burn as they build up their friendship, but the pace felt perfect for them, and they share so many sweet and tender moments.
The ending left me longing and I can’t wait to read more of Ben and Kinsley’ story in the next book!
January 12, 2022
Nora Phoenix is a tease... I know I've said this about her White House Men series that had a suspense sub-plot, but she took the gloves off with Clean Start at Forty-Seven...
Read my full review:
http://www.mmromancereviewed.com/2022...
Read my full review:
http://www.mmromancereviewed.com/2022...
May 11, 2022
Florida. He's in recovery and getting healthy. At the gym, his trainer is his son's best friend, and we get occasional flashbacks to show us their pasts.
This is deep, and thought-filled, with acceptance and understanding, except for the religious family.
Kinsey, 47, in pill addiction recovery, and he's lost everything, job, marriage and his grown children's attention. He was a doctor, and is a silver fox, but now he's beginning again, is out, and struggling to find his way, away from the religious teachings that gave him so much grief.
Benoni, 27, is a personal trainer, fit and tattooed, Kinsey's son's best friend since middle school, plus he's a dominant/Dom/Daddy and living boldly in life.
Along with the healing for Kinsey, we feel his guilt and pain that goes with the regrets. He needs to regain his kid's acceptance. He is getting his body fit again, and is 6 months free of the addicting pills. His torn ACL had put him on the road to more and more pain meds, and he now has a sponsor, and Benoni's coaching.
Kinsey and Benoni are friends that can speak freely, and with help Kinsey must figure out that way he can forgive himself and live his true life. Of course it's complicated and we will need to read book #2 for our conclusion. We will, because we want to see what happens next.
We like our characters and the situation is moving forward, plus we readers are full of hope.
Kinsey is out as gay, dealing with that newness, and discovers he's a submissive/boy. He's tired of the religious crap he was fed for so long, and it takes a lot of soul searching and conversations to begin to see the real world and relieve himself of the guilt.
He needs to escape that feeling and live free, to finally be himself. He deserves it. Benoni is a marvelous friend and so caring and smart. He has been loving Kinsey for awhile, and Kinsey is struggling to see what Benoni sees in him.
A well written story with heart and tenderness, and depth. LOTS of information and explanations. I'm moving on to the next one.
ENJOY !
Triggers: warning at the beginning, addiction, religious homophobia.
======
This is deep, and thought-filled, with acceptance and understanding, except for the religious family.
Kinsey, 47, in pill addiction recovery, and he's lost everything, job, marriage and his grown children's attention. He was a doctor, and is a silver fox, but now he's beginning again, is out, and struggling to find his way, away from the religious teachings that gave him so much grief.
Benoni, 27, is a personal trainer, fit and tattooed, Kinsey's son's best friend since middle school, plus he's a dominant/Dom/Daddy and living boldly in life.
Along with the healing for Kinsey, we feel his guilt and pain that goes with the regrets. He needs to regain his kid's acceptance. He is getting his body fit again, and is 6 months free of the addicting pills. His torn ACL had put him on the road to more and more pain meds, and he now has a sponsor, and Benoni's coaching.
Kinsey and Benoni are friends that can speak freely, and with help Kinsey must figure out that way he can forgive himself and live his true life. Of course it's complicated and we will need to read book #2 for our conclusion. We will, because we want to see what happens next.
We like our characters and the situation is moving forward, plus we readers are full of hope.
Kinsey is out as gay, dealing with that newness, and discovers he's a submissive/boy. He's tired of the religious crap he was fed for so long, and it takes a lot of soul searching and conversations to begin to see the real world and relieve himself of the guilt.
He needs to escape that feeling and live free, to finally be himself. He deserves it. Benoni is a marvelous friend and so caring and smart. He has been loving Kinsey for awhile, and Kinsey is struggling to see what Benoni sees in him.
A well written story with heart and tenderness, and depth. LOTS of information and explanations. I'm moving on to the next one.
ENJOY !
Triggers: warning at the beginning, addiction, religious homophobia.
======
June 15, 2022
The premise of this book sounded very promising to me, but it ended up only being an okay read. I felt that the book did a good job dealing with heavy topics without feeling too depressing to read, and I liked that the characters communicated well around those topics. Unfortunately some aspects of the writing didn't really work for me. Since the book switches between current time and flashbacks, the present tense felt a bit jarring. The narration/internal monologues got repetitive at times, and the dialogue sometimes felt stilted and unnatural. It's a book that has a lot of tropes I like, and that I felt were done well, like age gap, a character exploring their queer identity later in life, kink discovery, etc., so it was disappointing that I didn't like the writing enough to want to read the second part of the duology.
November 3, 2022
Fühlt sich an, als ob man nur die Hälfte eines Buches gelesen hätte. Weiß nicht, warum man eine Duologie macht, wenn es ein Story-Arc ist. Es hört einfach an einer Stelle auf und beginnt genau dort im nächsten "Teil". Versteh ich einfach nicht.
March 7, 2022
This was fine. The author starts this book by discussing how the issues discussed in this book -- religious abuse, homophobia, addiction -- are somewhat personal to her. I think these are issues that can be really interesting when used in a romance novel. However, in this book the dialogue seemed so stilted that it felt like reading a PSA rather than a story.
One of the things that made this book less enjoyable to me was the monologues that characters would go on exploring some of the difficult issues in the book. They felt very little like conversations and felt a lot like just repetition of discussions the author had seen elsewhere. There are ways that people actually talk about issues like religious homophobia and drug abuse and these characters don't sound like that. Stuff like a character saying "I hate the term homophobia, it's not a fear, it a hatred" made me feel like I had been transported back in time to 2012. It just felt very unnatural all the way through.
The characters were mostly fine. I liked Benoni and Kinsey well enough, Kinsey more than Benoni though. It did seem like their relationship did develop naturally, though this is only the first half of the story. I also liked some of the side characters. Kinsey's relationship with his family is very interesting. We only really hear from his son Johnathan in this book and I would have liked to have heard from his wife and daughter as well but it is an interesting plot thread.
There were also side characters I didn't like, such as Leif. Leif is kind of crucial to the plot because he receives domestic discipline from Benoni even though they're just roommates and that's how Kinsey figures out he might like that. He also shoots porn for OnlyFans, which could be interesting but isn't discussed that much. I found Leif to be very frustrating. His submission to Benoni felt less like something that would help him grow out of bad habit, which is how it's described in the book, and more like learned helplessness. For instance, Leif often doesn't eat and when he does that, Benoni will spank him. Benoni tells him he doesn't have to be bad to get spanked and Leif says he has to be bad or it won't be the same sense of release. If that's true, the spanking is enforcing the bad behavior, not helping Leif grow. If this really was about growth, this plot needed to be reworked.
There were a couple of other stray things that bothered me. Kinsey is having to learn a lot about gay culture because he's just now embracing that side of him and some things that were brought up as a result of that were just weird to me. For instance, when getting coffee with another gay man, Frank, Frank starts discussing the porn Leif shoots and Kinsey thinks this...
and yeah no. I worked at a theatre specifically centered around LGBT+ people are about a yeah and a half and there were plenty of gay men there. They weren't just talking about the porn they were watching all the time because that would be weird, just like it would be weird if any other group did that. It's weird to imply that discussing porn habits are something common among gay men in particular. There's just some stuff like this that makes it feel like the author doesn't 100% know what's up with gay culture. Also during the same conversation, Frank says he is HIV+ but he talks medicine that keeps his viral load undetectable. Kinsey goes ahead and tells him that means he can't transmit the virus, which like, I'm pretty sure Frank would know that, Honestly, that whole section was weird.
As I said I did like some of the characters and the writing isn't bad. It is also clear that the author did research on the opioid crisis and as far as I can tell, she doesn't get anything wrong there. However, this story just did not work for me. Everything felt so unnatural and like the author was using the dialogue solely to get her point across instead of using it to further the relationships between the characters. This book leaves off basically in the middle of the story but honestly, I'm not super compelled to pick up the sequel. Clearly, a lot of people love this book, and that's great! It just didn't quite hit the right notes for me.
One of the things that made this book less enjoyable to me was the monologues that characters would go on exploring some of the difficult issues in the book. They felt very little like conversations and felt a lot like just repetition of discussions the author had seen elsewhere. There are ways that people actually talk about issues like religious homophobia and drug abuse and these characters don't sound like that. Stuff like a character saying "I hate the term homophobia, it's not a fear, it a hatred" made me feel like I had been transported back in time to 2012. It just felt very unnatural all the way through.
The characters were mostly fine. I liked Benoni and Kinsey well enough, Kinsey more than Benoni though. It did seem like their relationship did develop naturally, though this is only the first half of the story. I also liked some of the side characters. Kinsey's relationship with his family is very interesting. We only really hear from his son Johnathan in this book and I would have liked to have heard from his wife and daughter as well but it is an interesting plot thread.
There were also side characters I didn't like, such as Leif. Leif is kind of crucial to the plot because he receives domestic discipline from Benoni even though they're just roommates and that's how Kinsey figures out he might like that. He also shoots porn for OnlyFans, which could be interesting but isn't discussed that much. I found Leif to be very frustrating. His submission to Benoni felt less like something that would help him grow out of bad habit, which is how it's described in the book, and more like learned helplessness. For instance, Leif often doesn't eat and when he does that, Benoni will spank him. Benoni tells him he doesn't have to be bad to get spanked and Leif says he has to be bad or it won't be the same sense of release. If that's true, the spanking is enforcing the bad behavior, not helping Leif grow. If this really was about growth, this plot needed to be reworked.
There were a couple of other stray things that bothered me. Kinsey is having to learn a lot about gay culture because he's just now embracing that side of him and some things that were brought up as a result of that were just weird to me. For instance, when getting coffee with another gay man, Frank, Frank starts discussing the porn Leif shoots and Kinsey thinks this...
Ah, right. I’m not used to being so open about watching porn, but I guess that, too, is normal among gay men.
and yeah no. I worked at a theatre specifically centered around LGBT+ people are about a yeah and a half and there were plenty of gay men there. They weren't just talking about the porn they were watching all the time because that would be weird, just like it would be weird if any other group did that. It's weird to imply that discussing porn habits are something common among gay men in particular. There's just some stuff like this that makes it feel like the author doesn't 100% know what's up with gay culture. Also during the same conversation, Frank says he is HIV+ but he talks medicine that keeps his viral load undetectable. Kinsey goes ahead and tells him that means he can't transmit the virus, which like, I'm pretty sure Frank would know that, Honestly, that whole section was weird.
As I said I did like some of the characters and the writing isn't bad. It is also clear that the author did research on the opioid crisis and as far as I can tell, she doesn't get anything wrong there. However, this story just did not work for me. Everything felt so unnatural and like the author was using the dialogue solely to get her point across instead of using it to further the relationships between the characters. This book leaves off basically in the middle of the story but honestly, I'm not super compelled to pick up the sequel. Clearly, a lot of people love this book, and that's great! It just didn't quite hit the right notes for me.
January 12, 2022
Fantastic!
Oh wow I absolutely loved this book! It made me feel so much. Kinsey and Benoni were just amazing together. On paper, nothing about them should work. There is a 20 year age gap, Kinsey has just come out at 47, has never been with a man before and is struggling to put his life back together, and Benoni is his estranged son's best friend. A recipe for disaster and yet their connection is palpable and strong from the start. I completely fell in love with both of these men. Benoni was such a strong, confident, genuine, and compassionate person. Kinsey was trying to put his life back together after losing so much and his commitment, dedication, and honesty was so strong. I simply loved their connection, I felt it in my soul, I was rooting for them the entire way. Not only was the UST strong, but I was pulled in so much by the deep level of affection and care they had for one another.
There are trigger warnings in this book, read them, they are present throughout. Although some of them might be tough to read, like religious homophobia and the lasting effects of addiction, they were handled so beautifully by the author as they set the foundation for Kinsey's struggles and the challenges he had to overcome. They were real, they were raw, and they shaped the man he has become.
Lastly, this is a duology, the book ends in a good place but definitely left me excited for the next one. While I am not usually a fan of having to wait for the next book to get the end of the story, it felt right here. The book ended in a way that made me happy. I was so effected by these two men that I will be thinking about them for the next few weeks until the rest of their story is told. This book really worked for me. Kinsey and Benoni's romance and friendship just touched heart!
Oh wow I absolutely loved this book! It made me feel so much. Kinsey and Benoni were just amazing together. On paper, nothing about them should work. There is a 20 year age gap, Kinsey has just come out at 47, has never been with a man before and is struggling to put his life back together, and Benoni is his estranged son's best friend. A recipe for disaster and yet their connection is palpable and strong from the start. I completely fell in love with both of these men. Benoni was such a strong, confident, genuine, and compassionate person. Kinsey was trying to put his life back together after losing so much and his commitment, dedication, and honesty was so strong. I simply loved their connection, I felt it in my soul, I was rooting for them the entire way. Not only was the UST strong, but I was pulled in so much by the deep level of affection and care they had for one another.
There are trigger warnings in this book, read them, they are present throughout. Although some of them might be tough to read, like religious homophobia and the lasting effects of addiction, they were handled so beautifully by the author as they set the foundation for Kinsey's struggles and the challenges he had to overcome. They were real, they were raw, and they shaped the man he has become.
Lastly, this is a duology, the book ends in a good place but definitely left me excited for the next one. While I am not usually a fan of having to wait for the next book to get the end of the story, it felt right here. The book ended in a way that made me happy. I was so effected by these two men that I will be thinking about them for the next few weeks until the rest of their story is told. This book really worked for me. Kinsey and Benoni's romance and friendship just touched heart!
March 7, 2022
Minority opinion here. On the surface this story had all the components I assumed I'd love. But it just didn't gel. Was it because there was too much narrative and too much inner dialogue? Maybe. How much is too much? When it starts to feel like an info dump.
There were also time dumps: chapters to show Kinsey marriage, his job, his interactions with others, including his son's bestie, Benoni, whom Kinsey witnessed getting a BJ from a friend while at Kinsey's house. There are a lot of interwoven interactions here and Kinsey meeting Benoni (never Ben) at his gym and working with him created some interesting reactions.
I wanted to like both characters and there were things I liked about both. But as the story progressed and Benoni took on a "Daddy" vibe and Kinsey got needy, my attention started to stray. The intent was good but the execution fell short, IMO. When I realized I was spending more time playing card games and word puzzles on my iPad than I was reading the story, I temporarily DNF'd it. I picked it up again two days ago and sped through to the end. I say all this because it may have just been my mood at the time, the busyness of my life, whatever. I did like the end and i am going to read the next story. But overall, if I rated this higher than two stars, I wouldn't be true to how I felt about it.
There were also time dumps: chapters to show Kinsey marriage, his job, his interactions with others, including his son's bestie, Benoni, whom Kinsey witnessed getting a BJ from a friend while at Kinsey's house. There are a lot of interwoven interactions here and Kinsey meeting Benoni (never Ben) at his gym and working with him created some interesting reactions.
I wanted to like both characters and there were things I liked about both. But as the story progressed and Benoni took on a "Daddy" vibe and Kinsey got needy, my attention started to stray. The intent was good but the execution fell short, IMO. When I realized I was spending more time playing card games and word puzzles on my iPad than I was reading the story, I temporarily DNF'd it. I picked it up again two days ago and sped through to the end. I say all this because it may have just been my mood at the time, the busyness of my life, whatever. I did like the end and i am going to read the next story. But overall, if I rated this higher than two stars, I wouldn't be true to how I felt about it.
September 17, 2025
Whoa. Like, whoa. If you're looking for feels, you've found them. All of them.
I literally could not put this book down and it took my Kindle battery dying to be able to stop reading to go to sleep. Each page made me hungrier for the next.
It's not only the slow burn. It's not only the longing and the hurt/comfort. It's also the brilliantly crafted men whose chemistry and need for each other leap off the page and straight into the reader's heart.
This book doesn't end on a cliffhanger, but it's not finished either. There's a certain satisfaction to the end of the book but I'm definitely eager for book 2 now!
I'm not triggered by religious bigotry, internalised homophobia or addictions - but if you are be aware of the risks for you in this story. It's emotional and deep which makes it so fulfilling.
I literally could not put this book down and it took my Kindle battery dying to be able to stop reading to go to sleep. Each page made me hungrier for the next.
It's not only the slow burn. It's not only the longing and the hurt/comfort. It's also the brilliantly crafted men whose chemistry and need for each other leap off the page and straight into the reader's heart.
This book doesn't end on a cliffhanger, but it's not finished either. There's a certain satisfaction to the end of the book but I'm definitely eager for book 2 now!
I'm not triggered by religious bigotry, internalised homophobia or addictions - but if you are be aware of the risks for you in this story. It's emotional and deep which makes it so fulfilling.
January 12, 2022
Absolutely beautiful, full of complex emotions.
Kinsey's story is absolutely heartbreaking.
Coming from a religious background myself I can absolutely identity with him and how difficult his life has been.
The author did a splendid job of conveying those emotions and feelings of guilt and inadequacy.
Having to hide yourself for a lifetime can be soul crushing.
Bennoni is absolutely the perfect partner for Kinsey.
He truly sees him as he is and not only accepts him but encourages him to be himself and loves seeing him blossom.
Their relationship will be one of equality because they both need what the other gives, submission and caretaking.
I'm desperately waiting for the conclusion and HEA between these two beautiful men.
Kinsey's story is absolutely heartbreaking.
Coming from a religious background myself I can absolutely identity with him and how difficult his life has been.
The author did a splendid job of conveying those emotions and feelings of guilt and inadequacy.
Having to hide yourself for a lifetime can be soul crushing.
Bennoni is absolutely the perfect partner for Kinsey.
He truly sees him as he is and not only accepts him but encourages him to be himself and loves seeing him blossom.
Their relationship will be one of equality because they both need what the other gives, submission and caretaking.
I'm desperately waiting for the conclusion and HEA between these two beautiful men.
February 10, 2022
I couldn't do it. Tried and failed to finish. Got to 51% and threw in the towel. I find the religious aspect heinous in its beliefs. My heart totally bleeds for Kinsey and all those who have been through something so hideous. But I couldnt get past the dialogue. It went somewhat wrong along the way. Benoni - it was like he put on a cape and called himself superman. The dialogue felt off / awkward / stilted.... just didnt work. I'm not a particular fan of age gap, but his one had all the ingrediants to be really great, and yet the recipe failed. I'm not interested in Book 2
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