A Backslider's Guide to Getting Over God : Journey of an Evangelical Apostate

by Cassandra Brandt

I grew up in the Assembly of God, product of small town charismatic Pentecostal pastors, terrifying televangelists and a rod not spared. My flavor of fundamentalism demanded love of a detestable deity and condemned critical thought, inflicting it’s scars with both the message and its mediators. Evangelist apologist in youth, tormented by purity culture and grasping at a Rapture pass, I couldn’t compartmentalize my thinking anymore at age 22, and left the Evangelicals.

My journey from faith began with growing intrigue in the natural world, gnawing need to understand history, and disenchantment with the doctrine and dogma I was indoctrinated with, compounded by cognitive dissonance and the pull of my heart toward a secular morality.

No longer able to accept information without evidence and free to exercise critical thought, I embarked on a journey to answer the questions that burned in my soul upon snatching it back from the fold. Where did my universe and this species really come from? Where did that religion and that Bible really come from? How did it hold such power over people? I wanted to understand the psychology of belief of this nature. I wanted to explore alternative philosophies about morality and the meaning of life. Were there universal ethics and values and what were they? Was there a real path to joy and peace and how could I find it?


A Backslider’s Guide is the story of my youth in the church, fall from grace, eventual apostasy, and the culmination of my research that allowed me to finally get over God. Packed with research and littered with quotes from historians, academics, and biblical scholars, I trace my journey toward my heresy. To those outside fundamentalism, I present a researched insider’s point of view of evangelical indoctrination. To my fellow apostates I offer solidarity in sharing the psychological scars it caused, and challenging the evangelical doctrine that teaches hate, fear and shame and calls it love.

292 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 9, 2022

About the author

Scholar with a background in Sociology, Cassandra Brandt studies the intersection between religious faith, psychology, and human rights. She also writes on philosophy and mental health.

Cassandra works in advocacy for people with disabilities and is developing a peer mentoring service for individuals with trauma to be known as Iron Minds LLC.

Spinal cord injury survivor and former structural steelworker, Cassandra was born and raised in Globe Arizona and has one dear daughter and two precious grandbabies. Find her blogs on WordPress and books on Amazon.

Reviews

[Pamela Conley · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this book the author she tells her personal story of growing up in a evangelical community, leaving that faith tradition, and then does an over view of historical philosophies, a pretty deep dive into deontology, and structures and formations of ethical determinations. She does this while keeping it engaging and accessible, all with an enormous amount of quoted sources. The first 5 or so chapters is a personal memoire but the remainder is a very accessibly written discussion of philosophy, deontology, and ethics. This was a very compelling read. Thank you Cassandra Brandt for sharing this very personal yet deeply researched narrative on your journey through your experience of being human. I will be reading more books written by this author.