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Freundin bleibst du immer
Drei Frauen. Drei Jahrzehnte. Die Freundschaft ihres Lebens.
Als Funmis Tochter in Lagos heiratet, kommen die drei unzertrennlichen Freundinnen Funmi, Enitan und Zainab wieder zusammen. Nach der Universität führten ihre Wege in unterschiedliche Richtungen: Enitan, die sich immer Sicherheit wünschte, ist nun getrennt und alleinerziehend, die künstlerisch begabte Zainab pflegt ihren Mann, der nach einem Schlaganfall gelähmt ist. Funmi lebt als Frau eines zwielichtigen Geschäftsmannes ein Luxusleben im goldenen Käfig. Gemeinsam denken Zainab, Funmi und Enitan darüber nach, was sie geliebt und verloren haben. Aber auch die Gegenwart birgt Überraschungen, denn ihre Töchter sind genauso rebellisch und offenherzig, wie sie es einst waren.
Tomi Obaro erzählt die Geschichte dreier Frauen, von ihrem Verrat und ihren Triumphen und vor allem von ihrer unvergesslichen, unverrückbaren Freundschaft.
Als Funmis Tochter in Lagos heiratet, kommen die drei unzertrennlichen Freundinnen Funmi, Enitan und Zainab wieder zusammen. Nach der Universität führten ihre Wege in unterschiedliche Richtungen: Enitan, die sich immer Sicherheit wünschte, ist nun getrennt und alleinerziehend, die künstlerisch begabte Zainab pflegt ihren Mann, der nach einem Schlaganfall gelähmt ist. Funmi lebt als Frau eines zwielichtigen Geschäftsmannes ein Luxusleben im goldenen Käfig. Gemeinsam denken Zainab, Funmi und Enitan darüber nach, was sie geliebt und verloren haben. Aber auch die Gegenwart birgt Überraschungen, denn ihre Töchter sind genauso rebellisch und offenherzig, wie sie es einst waren.
Tomi Obaro erzählt die Geschichte dreier Frauen, von ihrem Verrat und ihren Triumphen und vor allem von ihrer unvergesslichen, unverrückbaren Freundschaft.
320 pages, Hardcover
First published June 28, 2022
179 people are currently reading
15150 people want to read
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August 1, 2022Following the stories of three friends, reuniting after years apart, in Lagos for one of their daughter’s weddings, Funmi, Zainab, and Enitan have a complicated history. But their friendship has endured heartaches and decades. Exploring the complexity of female friendships and mother-daughter relationships, this is a story rendered with so much heart.
May 6, 2022
I always love stumbling across a wonderful debut and that is exactly what this book is!
Dele Weds Destiny follows three friends, brought back together by the wedding of one of their daughters. The book explores the highs and lows of their friendship, from university until they have grown children of their own.
I always talk about how much I love strong female characters in books. Not only did I get 3 main strong female characters, but some of the supporting characters were shining examples too. I particularly fell in love with Remi, she has a strength and innocence that I just adored. She’s not afraid to stand up for what she believes in and learn new things. The book is written from the different perspectives of the three main characters and each chapter was clearly marked which I loved! It added so much depth to their stories to see their own thoughts and the reasons for their actions. This is a slow burn novel, with the focus on the characters and their stories. At times I couldn’t believe they were all still friends, but the resilience and commitment to the friendship shines through by the end.
The timeline jumps from the present, to the past and then back to the present. I initially enjoyed this but after a while I found myself loosing focus in the timeline from the past. There were parts that were gold and other parts I struggled with. There’s also a big gap between the university and the present, I long to know more about the women in these years! I absolutely loved how vivid Nigeria was on these pages! I felt like I was surrounded by the lifestyle, the food and the clothes! I feel a new desperation to attend a Nigerian wedding now! I love books that can give insights into different cultures and this did exactly that. The ending was both complete, whilst leaving me wanting more. I feel like I’m not ready to say goodbye to these characters yet!
I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys slow-burning contemporary fiction with a focus on friendship. I want to thank Tandem Collective, Hodder books and Tomi Obaro for allowing me to read this book and give my personal thoughts.
Dele Weds Destiny follows three friends, brought back together by the wedding of one of their daughters. The book explores the highs and lows of their friendship, from university until they have grown children of their own.
I always talk about how much I love strong female characters in books. Not only did I get 3 main strong female characters, but some of the supporting characters were shining examples too. I particularly fell in love with Remi, she has a strength and innocence that I just adored. She’s not afraid to stand up for what she believes in and learn new things. The book is written from the different perspectives of the three main characters and each chapter was clearly marked which I loved! It added so much depth to their stories to see their own thoughts and the reasons for their actions. This is a slow burn novel, with the focus on the characters and their stories. At times I couldn’t believe they were all still friends, but the resilience and commitment to the friendship shines through by the end.
The timeline jumps from the present, to the past and then back to the present. I initially enjoyed this but after a while I found myself loosing focus in the timeline from the past. There were parts that were gold and other parts I struggled with. There’s also a big gap between the university and the present, I long to know more about the women in these years! I absolutely loved how vivid Nigeria was on these pages! I felt like I was surrounded by the lifestyle, the food and the clothes! I feel a new desperation to attend a Nigerian wedding now! I love books that can give insights into different cultures and this did exactly that. The ending was both complete, whilst leaving me wanting more. I feel like I’m not ready to say goodbye to these characters yet!
I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys slow-burning contemporary fiction with a focus on friendship. I want to thank Tandem Collective, Hodder books and Tomi Obaro for allowing me to read this book and give my personal thoughts.
September 25, 2022
This book felt like it should have engulfed my attention, but I couldn’t help but be generally uninterested. Did some parts of the book grab my interest? Yeah, it did! These parts were just unexpected. We were introduced to the three women and at first, it was just hard for me to care. However, we get to their past and we certainly start to understand them way more. A message this one sent to me was that we might have a really dramatic past, but our future can end up being drastically different. Their friendship was quite peculiar because they were all different from each other. Honestly, I did expect to have these feelings for the book after reading the description. It was screaming a lot of unnecessary drama that I personally might not be able to see a lot of purpose in.
I will give this a thumbs up for how it ended though. It didn’t follow the “normal” way a book usually ended. I always love seeing something different.
I will give this a thumbs up for how it ended though. It didn’t follow the “normal” way a book usually ended. I always love seeing something different.
January 22, 2023
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This is one of those cases where the blurb for novel spoils said novel. Rather than giving us a broad-stroke summary of the story, the blurb reveals almost every plotline in the story, so while I was actually reading the novel myself, and I kept expecting something ‘new’ to happen, well, I ended up feeling rather underwhelmed. That is not to say that Dele Weds Destiny is not a good debut, I mean, I didn't love it, but I recognise that the writing is competent, the dialogues are (for the most part) charged, and the setting is strongly rendered. Alas, the storyline just doesn’t offer much besides what is mentioned in the blurb. I can see this appealing to fans of Liane Moriarty or books like Nikki May's Wahala, where a group of friends reunite as adults, with some of them being married, others having children or wanting children, and others still are career-focused…I was hoping for Tomi Obaro to add something new to this rather tired premise but the dynamic Funmi, Enitan, and Zainab, the three Nigerian women whose friendship is meant to be the core of the novel, is sadly fairly one-note. The narrative very much reminded me of my least favourite novel by Elif Shafak's Three Daughters of Eve, which also presents us with an older woman looking back to her time at university where she (supposedly) became friends with two very different girls (one is more conservative, the other seems to embrace a more liberal lifestyle). In both books the girls don't really strike me as real friends...
The first 40% of the narrative introduces us to former college friends Funmi, Enitan, and Zainab, who are now in their middle-age, as they reunite in Lagos to celebrate Funmi’s daughter’s wedding. As we follow Enitan and Zainab making their way to Funmi’s house, we are given an understanding of their current circumstances: Enitan, who is based in New York, and her husband Chalres, a white American, are getting divorced and their teenage daughter, Remi, now resents her, but not their father; Zainab’s has become a carer to her older husband Ahmed, after he suffered two strokes. Funmi seems to enjoy a lavish lifestyle and is not interested in asking her husband about his ‘shady’ business. Her daughter, Destiny, is by all appearances a devoted daughter, who is respectful of her elders and fulfilling the life her parents want her to. But Funmi wishes that she could have a more meaningful relationship with her, as Destiny seems to hold her at a distance.
The story in this first part is very slow going, and a bit too heavy on exposition.
The middle section of the novel takes us back to their crucial college days, where we are given an impression of 1980s Nigeria's climate of social and political unease as well as a more detailed impression of the friends’ respective upbringing and social statuses. Now, I wanted to see the friendship evolve slowly, as they find themselves putting aside assumptions they may have made upon first meeting one another, or bond over shared commonalities…but the narrative kind of skips over that. Their friendship struck me as one of convenience, and to be honest, even putting that aside, their bond… was not that much of a friendship even. Funmi and Zainab are obviously at odds, and they seemed far more involved with their respective men than anything or anyone else. Enitan was the classic inoffensive go-between whose characterisation also ends up getting sidelined in favor of introducing us to Charles. The men themselves were forgettable, and I didn’t really care for them or their supposed feelings for our protagonists.
Anyway, I kept thinking that this ‘then’ section would unearth something more than what the summary had detailed but no, not really. So I was kind of frustrated by it having to occupy such a big chunk of the narrative, as it doesn’t reveal anything new or flesh out the characters either.
The final section takes us back to the present where the narrative obviously parallels the experiences of their children with their ones at college. I wouldn’t have minded the focus on mother/daughter dynamics if said daughters had been credible. Destiny is the dutiful daughter, who is prepared to give up her dreams to live the kind of life her parents want her to (marrying the ‘right’ man, getting the ‘right’ degree). Remi is the kind of simplistic teenage girl that I have sadly come across one too many times in adult/literary fiction. This teenage girl often blames her mother for her marriage troubles (in some cases even if the dad cheated on her or worse). She has this supposedly liberal mindset and cares about social issues but when she goes to a different country or enters a different community or comes across people more disadvantaged than she is she will reveal how ignorant she is when it comes to politics, history, etc. If she’s rich or spending time with rich people she will act all outraged by their having cleaners or whatnot but then she isn't even capable of washing her own clothes or cleaning her room. If she blocks a toilet she will not think to unblock it herself but ask her mum for help…this girl inevitably has an eating disorder, or sometimes she self-harms because that’s what teenage girls do nowadays. I am just tired of reading about this kind of caricature of a teenage girl…Remi was embarrassingly childish and petty, the way she behaved towards her mother is so f*cking frustrating and I don’t understand why adult women portray teenage girls as so superficial and unlikable, whereas they will give other characters both flaws & virtues. Argh.
Also, I kept thinking that Dele and Destiny would play more of a role given that they are the ones mentioned in the title but they do not.
Anyway, Remi aside, the characters were okay. They weren't particularly nuanced but then again given the Liane Moriarty-esque premise I was expecting in-depth character studies. But this book lacks the in-group tension and the gossipy atmosphere that make Moriarty's books into such easily entertaining, sometimes even gripping, escapades. It's, by all means, an okay debut novel. I just wanted more drama, more friendship, just more. I didn't care for how the narrative incorporates plotlines including an abortion and a miscarriage, and treats these in a rushed and unsatisfying way...
Now for some positives: as I said, Obaro's dialogues and setting were for the most part evocative, and I particularly enjoyed her insights into past & present Nigerian culture. I also appreciated that she doesn't moralise or judge her main characters. They are not perfect, and sometimes they act or say things that are downright yikes, but, she never judges them for their choices & attitudes (to have casual sex, to wait to have sex until you are married, to find contentment in being a housewife, to be silly and romantic, to be studious and serious). She may poke fun at them, especially when they are being a bit hypocritical or whatever, but she's playful, never cruel.
If you are interested in this I encourage you to read more positive reviews as this may as well be your next great read.
Also, whoever is responsible for that summary...maybe next time don't give all of the book away.
This is one of those cases where the blurb for novel spoils said novel. Rather than giving us a broad-stroke summary of the story, the blurb reveals almost every plotline in the story, so while I was actually reading the novel myself, and I kept expecting something ‘new’ to happen, well, I ended up feeling rather underwhelmed. That is not to say that Dele Weds Destiny is not a good debut, I mean, I didn't love it, but I recognise that the writing is competent, the dialogues are (for the most part) charged, and the setting is strongly rendered. Alas, the storyline just doesn’t offer much besides what is mentioned in the blurb. I can see this appealing to fans of Liane Moriarty or books like Nikki May's Wahala, where a group of friends reunite as adults, with some of them being married, others having children or wanting children, and others still are career-focused…I was hoping for Tomi Obaro to add something new to this rather tired premise but the dynamic Funmi, Enitan, and Zainab, the three Nigerian women whose friendship is meant to be the core of the novel, is sadly fairly one-note. The narrative very much reminded me of my least favourite novel by Elif Shafak's Three Daughters of Eve, which also presents us with an older woman looking back to her time at university where she (supposedly) became friends with two very different girls (one is more conservative, the other seems to embrace a more liberal lifestyle). In both books the girls don't really strike me as real friends...
The first 40% of the narrative introduces us to former college friends Funmi, Enitan, and Zainab, who are now in their middle-age, as they reunite in Lagos to celebrate Funmi’s daughter’s wedding. As we follow Enitan and Zainab making their way to Funmi’s house, we are given an understanding of their current circumstances: Enitan, who is based in New York, and her husband Chalres, a white American, are getting divorced and their teenage daughter, Remi, now resents her, but not their father; Zainab’s has become a carer to her older husband Ahmed, after he suffered two strokes. Funmi seems to enjoy a lavish lifestyle and is not interested in asking her husband about his ‘shady’ business. Her daughter, Destiny, is by all appearances a devoted daughter, who is respectful of her elders and fulfilling the life her parents want her to. But Funmi wishes that she could have a more meaningful relationship with her, as Destiny seems to hold her at a distance.
The story in this first part is very slow going, and a bit too heavy on exposition.
The middle section of the novel takes us back to their crucial college days, where we are given an impression of 1980s Nigeria's climate of social and political unease as well as a more detailed impression of the friends’ respective upbringing and social statuses. Now, I wanted to see the friendship evolve slowly, as they find themselves putting aside assumptions they may have made upon first meeting one another, or bond over shared commonalities…but the narrative kind of skips over that. Their friendship struck me as one of convenience, and to be honest, even putting that aside, their bond… was not that much of a friendship even. Funmi and Zainab are obviously at odds, and they seemed far more involved with their respective men than anything or anyone else. Enitan was the classic inoffensive go-between whose characterisation also ends up getting sidelined in favor of introducing us to Charles. The men themselves were forgettable, and I didn’t really care for them or their supposed feelings for our protagonists.
Anyway, I kept thinking that this ‘then’ section would unearth something more than what the summary had detailed but no, not really. So I was kind of frustrated by it having to occupy such a big chunk of the narrative, as it doesn’t reveal anything new or flesh out the characters either.
The final section takes us back to the present where the narrative obviously parallels the experiences of their children with their ones at college. I wouldn’t have minded the focus on mother/daughter dynamics if said daughters had been credible. Destiny is the dutiful daughter, who is prepared to give up her dreams to live the kind of life her parents want her to (marrying the ‘right’ man, getting the ‘right’ degree). Remi is the kind of simplistic teenage girl that I have sadly come across one too many times in adult/literary fiction. This teenage girl often blames her mother for her marriage troubles (in some cases even if the dad cheated on her or worse). She has this supposedly liberal mindset and cares about social issues but when she goes to a different country or enters a different community or comes across people more disadvantaged than she is she will reveal how ignorant she is when it comes to politics, history, etc. If she’s rich or spending time with rich people she will act all outraged by their having cleaners or whatnot but then she isn't even capable of washing her own clothes or cleaning her room. If she blocks a toilet she will not think to unblock it herself but ask her mum for help…this girl inevitably has an eating disorder, or sometimes she self-harms because that’s what teenage girls do nowadays. I am just tired of reading about this kind of caricature of a teenage girl…Remi was embarrassingly childish and petty, the way she behaved towards her mother is so f*cking frustrating and I don’t understand why adult women portray teenage girls as so superficial and unlikable, whereas they will give other characters both flaws & virtues. Argh.
Also, I kept thinking that Dele and Destiny would play more of a role given that they are the ones mentioned in the title but they do not.
Anyway, Remi aside, the characters were okay. They weren't particularly nuanced but then again given the Liane Moriarty-esque premise I was expecting in-depth character studies. But this book lacks the in-group tension and the gossipy atmosphere that make Moriarty's books into such easily entertaining, sometimes even gripping, escapades. It's, by all means, an okay debut novel. I just wanted more drama, more friendship, just more. I didn't care for how the narrative incorporates plotlines including an abortion and a miscarriage, and treats these in a rushed and unsatisfying way...
Now for some positives: as I said, Obaro's dialogues and setting were for the most part evocative, and I particularly enjoyed her insights into past & present Nigerian culture. I also appreciated that she doesn't moralise or judge her main characters. They are not perfect, and sometimes they act or say things that are downright yikes, but, she never judges them for their choices & attitudes (to have casual sex, to wait to have sex until you are married, to find contentment in being a housewife, to be silly and romantic, to be studious and serious). She may poke fun at them, especially when they are being a bit hypocritical or whatever, but she's playful, never cruel.
If you are interested in this I encourage you to read more positive reviews as this may as well be your next great read.
Also, whoever is responsible for that summary...maybe next time don't give all of the book away.
July 24, 2022
Funmi, Enitan und Zainab, drei unzertrennliche Freundinnen, kommen nach dreißig Jahren in Lagos zusammen. Anlass ist die Hochzeit der Tochter von Funmi.
Als Leser tauchen wir in die afrikanische Kultur ein und erleben eine Geschichte von Verrat, Triumphen und einer unvergesslichen Freundschaft. Die Kapitel werden jeweils aus der Sicht einer der drei Frauen erzählt, was mir persönlich gut gefallen hat. Das Spiel zwischen Gegenwart und Vergangenheit, die Generationsunterschiede in Zusammenhang der traditionellen und modernen Kultur fand ich interessant zu lesen. Stellenweise hätte ich mir jedoch mehr Tiefe gewünscht.
Die Übersetzung aus dem Englischen von Stefanie Ochel liest sich flüssig und angenehm. Der Spannungsbogen und das Aufeinanderprallen der unterschiedlichen Ansichten ist gut dargestellt worden.
313 Seiten, die mir als Debüt gut gefallen haben und ich mich daher auf weitere Bücher der Autorin freue.
Als Leser tauchen wir in die afrikanische Kultur ein und erleben eine Geschichte von Verrat, Triumphen und einer unvergesslichen Freundschaft. Die Kapitel werden jeweils aus der Sicht einer der drei Frauen erzählt, was mir persönlich gut gefallen hat. Das Spiel zwischen Gegenwart und Vergangenheit, die Generationsunterschiede in Zusammenhang der traditionellen und modernen Kultur fand ich interessant zu lesen. Stellenweise hätte ich mir jedoch mehr Tiefe gewünscht.
Die Übersetzung aus dem Englischen von Stefanie Ochel liest sich flüssig und angenehm. Der Spannungsbogen und das Aufeinanderprallen der unterschiedlichen Ansichten ist gut dargestellt worden.
313 Seiten, die mir als Debüt gut gefallen haben und ich mich daher auf weitere Bücher der Autorin freue.
June 18, 2022
An absolutely ‘right down my street and up my alley’ kind of read for me.
I listened to this on audiobook and found it very entertaining and compulsive listening.
Dele Weds Destiny. Three women brought together again after many years at the celebration of this wedding.
We have the past, a middle and up to date the present here and now.
I loved the gossip, I loved finding out about each character.
The strength of these women shone through this book and I just loved it!
The women took whatever life threw at them, knuckled down, heads to the storm and walked right through out the other end…..this shows how strong us women can be.
Female friendships.
There are no friendships that are perfect is there?
We all have flaws, secrets and anxieties this is portrayed within these three main characters.
They are now in they’re 40’s with daughters of their own. I’m glad that wasn’t delved into as I enjoyed getting to know them both in their teenage years as well as in their 40’s
If you like reading about strong women, friendships realistically I’d highly recommend this.
I listened to this on audiobook and found it very entertaining and compulsive listening.
Dele Weds Destiny. Three women brought together again after many years at the celebration of this wedding.
We have the past, a middle and up to date the present here and now.
I loved the gossip, I loved finding out about each character.
The strength of these women shone through this book and I just loved it!
The women took whatever life threw at them, knuckled down, heads to the storm and walked right through out the other end…..this shows how strong us women can be.
Female friendships.
There are no friendships that are perfect is there?
We all have flaws, secrets and anxieties this is portrayed within these three main characters.
They are now in they’re 40’s with daughters of their own. I’m glad that wasn’t delved into as I enjoyed getting to know them both in their teenage years as well as in their 40’s
If you like reading about strong women, friendships realistically I’d highly recommend this.
September 21, 2022
I liked the setup of this book: three Nigerian women reunite after several years apart and come to terms with how their lives have evolved since they first met in college. I think Tomi Obaro includes interesting themes related to mother/daughter relationships, privilege or lack of privilege, and the gendered binds women encounter across different national contexts. Unfortunately, I felt like too much of the writing came across as passive voice-ish to me which made it difficult for me to invest in the narrative. Furthermore, I’m not sure the present day setup, followed by a flashback, followed by a very quick flash back to the present day was the most effective character development-wise. Onto the next!
July 7, 2022
I kept waiting for something big or huge to happen, and I was left with 3 % of the book when I realized, ohhh, this is really it. Not to say I didn't enjoy it, but I was mainly underwhelmed.
It's a beautiful book, very well narrated, fast paced even and the imagery was awesome I could really picture the traditional wedding.
The characters were likeable for the most part although not fully fleshed and I felt like I wanted more.
It's a beautiful book, very well narrated, fast paced even and the imagery was awesome I could really picture the traditional wedding.
The characters were likeable for the most part although not fully fleshed and I felt like I wanted more.
Read
April 24, 2025A book about female friendships, mothers and daughters, and the difficulty of fitting into society (whether it's the experience of being an immigrant, a non-rich person in Lagos, or just a girl in school). The emotions are terrifically done and the setting vivid. I wanted more plot, though: we have this whole situation laid out where one woman is divorcing, one struggling with her husband's incapacitation, and one married to a dodgy geezer, and...it doesn't go anywhere. I think if I'd approached it as 'slice of life' rather than expecting more in the way of event and resolution, I'd have got on better.
March 3, 2022
Sometimes I am wary of books that "celebrate friendship" but I had no problems here. This is a book that understands the ways friendships ebb and flow, the things you share and the things you hold back. Our three protagonists are not the kind of friends you see in a movie, they start out very different and they become even more different over the decades.
I am also wary of books about mothers and daughters, and that element isn't quite as strong here. The mother/daughter elements are not explored in nearly as much depth, they're more of the plot dressing, really.
But there is so much to enjoy here, I loved spending time with all three women in their 40s and then getting to see them back in their teens after already getting to know them. (By the time we jumped back in time I was so far into the book that I wasn't anticipating it at all, which was great, actually! Just as you're getting into the part where you know how it's all going to end, you get a big boost of history with lots and lots of plot and backstory.)
I am also wary of books about mothers and daughters, and that element isn't quite as strong here. The mother/daughter elements are not explored in nearly as much depth, they're more of the plot dressing, really.
But there is so much to enjoy here, I loved spending time with all three women in their 40s and then getting to see them back in their teens after already getting to know them. (By the time we jumped back in time I was so far into the book that I wasn't anticipating it at all, which was great, actually! Just as you're getting into the part where you know how it's all going to end, you get a big boost of history with lots and lots of plot and backstory.)
February 17, 2024
Friendship, love, history and finding one’s path is all played out in a beautiful way in this book.
The book is told from the point of view of three friends who met in college in Nigeria who are reuniting for the first time in over 30 years as one of their daughters prepares to be married. We hear from:
Funmi lives in Lagos in the lap of luxury. She married rich, but her husband is constantly busy and doesn’t really take her on. With her daughter’s Destiny’s wedding coming up, she is excited to throw the wedding of the century.
Enitan met a man who was on a mission trip and decided to elope and go with him to America. Years later they are getting divorced, she is raising their daughter Remi, and they have a contentious relationship but it is clear they love each other. Enitan is happy to be returning home to Nigeria after years of being away.
Zainab is reserved and the most understanding of the group. She got married very early to her teacher against her father’s wishes. Her husband met in an accident and now she spends all her time taking care of him. He is secretly resentful and she doesn’t know how to move forward.
All three women after catching up after years of trying to figure out life apart. Funmi, Enitan and Zainab all are struggling with how to show up as their true self with the hand they were dealt during life. Destiny’s wedding brings for them a reckoning moment.
I enjoyed this book. The title is a bit misleading because, we hardly heard from Destiny but I guess her wedding was a pivotal moment. The book does an exceptional job of explore friendships, mother-daughter relationships, love, regret and loss. I especially enjoyed when we got more of the women back in the university days and we saw how their decisions then shaped who they are today.
A solid debut novel!
The book is told from the point of view of three friends who met in college in Nigeria who are reuniting for the first time in over 30 years as one of their daughters prepares to be married. We hear from:
Funmi lives in Lagos in the lap of luxury. She married rich, but her husband is constantly busy and doesn’t really take her on. With her daughter’s Destiny’s wedding coming up, she is excited to throw the wedding of the century.
Enitan met a man who was on a mission trip and decided to elope and go with him to America. Years later they are getting divorced, she is raising their daughter Remi, and they have a contentious relationship but it is clear they love each other. Enitan is happy to be returning home to Nigeria after years of being away.
Zainab is reserved and the most understanding of the group. She got married very early to her teacher against her father’s wishes. Her husband met in an accident and now she spends all her time taking care of him. He is secretly resentful and she doesn’t know how to move forward.
All three women after catching up after years of trying to figure out life apart. Funmi, Enitan and Zainab all are struggling with how to show up as their true self with the hand they were dealt during life. Destiny’s wedding brings for them a reckoning moment.
I enjoyed this book. The title is a bit misleading because, we hardly heard from Destiny but I guess her wedding was a pivotal moment. The book does an exceptional job of explore friendships, mother-daughter relationships, love, regret and loss. I especially enjoyed when we got more of the women back in the university days and we saw how their decisions then shaped who they are today.
A solid debut novel!
January 25, 2022
Really good potential that totally lost steam.
DELE WEDS DESTINY seemed like my kind of book: generational differences, female friendship, nuanced depictions of a specific culture. This is very much a character driven novel, which I typically enjoy, but the structure felt very strange. I wished the first and second parts had been reversed, and the ending is so jarringly abrupt it took this from a 4-star to a 3-star read.
I also hope the publisher rewrites the book jacket copy, as it reveals way too much of the plot.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for providing an eARC in exchange for this review.
DELE WEDS DESTINY seemed like my kind of book: generational differences, female friendship, nuanced depictions of a specific culture. This is very much a character driven novel, which I typically enjoy, but the structure felt very strange. I wished the first and second parts had been reversed, and the ending is so jarringly abrupt it took this from a 4-star to a 3-star read.
I also hope the publisher rewrites the book jacket copy, as it reveals way too much of the plot.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for providing an eARC in exchange for this review.
July 8, 2024
you ever read books and it seems the author doesn't want write the story they pitched so they just write around it. That's this. Although the idea is good it never is actualized. The main wedding concept is after thought. Characters are picked up and put down. Any moment of tension is quickly glossed over.
August 7, 2022
Nach vielen Jahren ohne sich zu sehen, kommen Funmi, Enitan und Zainab wieder in Lagos zusammen. Die drei Freundinnen kennen sich seit ihrer Collegezeit und haben die wichtigsten und einschneidendsten Momente ihres Lebens miteinander geteilt. Durch die anstehende Hochzeit von Funmis Tochter haben die drei die Möglichkeit, die letzten Jahre Gesprächsstoff aufzuholen und ihre Freundschaft zu feiern.
Tomi Obaro hat mit ihrem Roman „Freundin bleibst du immer“, übersetzt von Stefanie Ochel, eine Ode an die Freundschaft geschrieben. Die drei Protagonistinnen könnten unterschiedlicher nicht sein. Der Autorin gelingt es, ihre verschiedenen Lebenssituationen authentisch zu beschreiben und lockte mit aufgrund der Wortwahl jede Menge Empathie für sie hervor. Auch die Perspektiven der Töchter empfand ich erfrischend und einen schönen Kontrast gegenüber der nun schon älteren drei Frauen. Tomi Obaro erzählt von Funmi, Enitan und Zainab sowohl in der Vergangenheit, als auch im Jahr des Geschehens und lässt somit auch viele gesellschaftliche Themen und Konflikte mit einfließen. Mir hat das Buch sehr gefallen, es liest sich schnell und ist gleichzeitig tiefgründig und humorvoll. Für mich war es die perfekte See-Lektüre!
Tomi Obaro hat mit ihrem Roman „Freundin bleibst du immer“, übersetzt von Stefanie Ochel, eine Ode an die Freundschaft geschrieben. Die drei Protagonistinnen könnten unterschiedlicher nicht sein. Der Autorin gelingt es, ihre verschiedenen Lebenssituationen authentisch zu beschreiben und lockte mit aufgrund der Wortwahl jede Menge Empathie für sie hervor. Auch die Perspektiven der Töchter empfand ich erfrischend und einen schönen Kontrast gegenüber der nun schon älteren drei Frauen. Tomi Obaro erzählt von Funmi, Enitan und Zainab sowohl in der Vergangenheit, als auch im Jahr des Geschehens und lässt somit auch viele gesellschaftliche Themen und Konflikte mit einfließen. Mir hat das Buch sehr gefallen, es liest sich schnell und ist gleichzeitig tiefgründig und humorvoll. Für mich war es die perfekte See-Lektüre!
June 18, 2025
Ein schönes und unterhaltsames Buch über drei Freundinnen und Nigeria. Habe ich sehr gerne gelesen, nur das Ende kam etwas abrupt 🌞
August 11, 2022
I might change my rating because I really enjoyed the unlikely friendships in this book, and how the author shares what the same location/event/interaction means to each different character.
But, the conclusion at the end is unbelievably rushed. I was already unconvinced about the switch to their college days in the middle of the story, and then the author decides to end the book at its most exciting point?!? I literally thought my copy was missing another 100 pages or so because of how randomly this drops off. Don’t read unless you want to be pissed off and let down!!!!
But, the conclusion at the end is unbelievably rushed. I was already unconvinced about the switch to their college days in the middle of the story, and then the author decides to end the book at its most exciting point?!? I literally thought my copy was missing another 100 pages or so because of how randomly this drops off. Don’t read unless you want to be pissed off and let down!!!!
July 18, 2022
STUNNING cover! 10/10 am obsessed but sadly the story wasn't quite as compelling for me. I loved the idea of following three college friends as their lives and loves evolve over thirty years. However I found the way the story went back and forth in time and switched POVs between each of the three women to be a bit hard to follow. I loved learning more about Nigerian culture and traditions and really enjoyed seeing how the women's friendship altered over the years. Some heavy issues were handled, including gun violence and abortion. Recommended for fans of These impossible things by Salma El-Wardany. Much thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy in exchange for my honest review!
July 13, 2022
This book started out good then definitely lost its flow. The ending was very abrupt. I feel like I wasted my time as I was waiting for more. And the title has absolutely Nothing to do with the characters. Wasted potential 👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽
September 1, 2022
This felt like being taken on a journey especially because we were given three friends narratives, though they met in university, you can tell - from how they spoke about each other- that they were/are fond of each other. Regardless of the years and the ups & downs that come with life.
The book being broken down into three parts, gave us context galore. Especially the part two which covers their past, it somewhat gives an explanation as to why or rather what shaped them into who they are now as wives and mothers while highlighting pivotal moments.
It's beautiful reading about sisterhood that has really gone through a lot but years later, trials and tribulations, they are still sticking it out. And being there for each other. Also redemption, we see how they have improved and grown in that friendship.
This was heartwarming to read.
The book being broken down into three parts, gave us context galore. Especially the part two which covers their past, it somewhat gives an explanation as to why or rather what shaped them into who they are now as wives and mothers while highlighting pivotal moments.
It's beautiful reading about sisterhood that has really gone through a lot but years later, trials and tribulations, they are still sticking it out. And being there for each other. Also redemption, we see how they have improved and grown in that friendship.
This was heartwarming to read.
April 23, 2023
I’m only giving this 4 stars because I loved the 3 friends and loved how Obaro led us on all their individual journeys. Other than that, this is a solid 3/3.5 stars book. The book’s title is deceiving. The story is about women friendships, love, mother-daughter relationships, motherhood, coming-of-age. The Dele character barely said 5 words in the novel for his name to be the 1st word in the title. And the ending is pretty poor; its unrealistic and just poorly tied the storyline together.
Fave character is Funmi. She’s a savage, but miss bitch is as real as they come! I need a friend like her- I could handle her savagery while simultaneously being inspired and awed by her bravery, crudeness and realness.
Fave character is Funmi. She’s a savage, but miss bitch is as real as they come! I need a friend like her- I could handle her savagery while simultaneously being inspired and awed by her bravery, crudeness and realness.
May 11, 2022
A wonderful debut novel. Slow burn character driven with a group dynamic of brilliantly unforgettable women. Loved it. Full review to follow
July 19, 2022
DELE WEDS DESTINY follows best friends Funmi, Enitan and Zainab as they reunite in Lagos, Nigeria after many years apart to celebrate the wedding of Funmi’s daughter, Destiny. If you love multigenerational novels that explore a culture through the highs and lows of friendship, motherhood and marriage then this is a book for you.
Told from each of the friends POV with timelines in both the present and past, I really enjoyed that we get to read all sides of their friendship. I was drawn into their lives through the secrets, disputes and envy to how they communicated and their bonds of trust. Each character brought a unique dimension to the story. I was particularly drawn to Funmi who was complex yet flawed, she suffered in different ways but had a strength that reflected in various ways throughout her life and shaped the way she mothered. Both Destiny and Remi (Enitan’s daughter) and the men that were in the MC’s lives introduced us to the generational impacts and cultural obligations of womanhood.
The depiction of Nigeria through it's political tension, relationship structures, tradition and culture was really nicely balanced and appreciated. There are also some serious themes that were handled with grace, from death, grief, political violence and pregnancy choices.
I would have liked the ending more if we were given an epilogue, as it is, the conclusion of the story left a bit to the imagination and a bit of closure and/or drama would have been nice (I say more drama...always 😂).
IG: @musingsonliving
Told from each of the friends POV with timelines in both the present and past, I really enjoyed that we get to read all sides of their friendship. I was drawn into their lives through the secrets, disputes and envy to how they communicated and their bonds of trust. Each character brought a unique dimension to the story. I was particularly drawn to Funmi who was complex yet flawed, she suffered in different ways but had a strength that reflected in various ways throughout her life and shaped the way she mothered. Both Destiny and Remi (Enitan’s daughter) and the men that were in the MC’s lives introduced us to the generational impacts and cultural obligations of womanhood.
The depiction of Nigeria through it's political tension, relationship structures, tradition and culture was really nicely balanced and appreciated. There are also some serious themes that were handled with grace, from death, grief, political violence and pregnancy choices.
I would have liked the ending more if we were given an epilogue, as it is, the conclusion of the story left a bit to the imagination and a bit of closure and/or drama would have been nice (I say more drama...always 😂).
IG: @musingsonliving
July 25, 2022
Mehr als zwanzig Jahre ist es her, dass sich ihre Wege trennten; dass sie unbeschwert und voller Freude auf das Leben, das ihnen nach dem Studium bevorstand, zusammensaßen und sich und ihren Abschluss an der Universität Zaria feierten. Während es Enitan nach New York verschlug, wo sie nun geschieden und alleinerziehend mit ihrer Tochter Remi wohnt, pflegt Zainab ihren nach mehreren Schlaganfällen gelähmten Mann. Funmi hingegen lebt in Hülle und Fülle, sie ist reich: Shoppen-bei-Harrods-reich, Fahrer-und-Diener-und-was-ihr-Mann-macht-ist-unklar-aber-definitiv-korrupt-wobei-sie-lieber-nicht-darüber-nachdenkt-reich. Doch auch wenn tausende Kilometer, mehrstellige Dollarbeträge und abrupte Fluchten sie trennen, das Leben es nicht immer gut mit ihnen meinte, niemals brach der Kontakt zwischen den drei Freundinnen ab. Und umso größer ist die Wiedersehensfreude, als sie nun bei der Hochzeit von Funmis Tochter Destiny in Lagos wieder vereint sind. Das Wiedersehen bringt Erinnerungen ans Licht: an ihre gemeinsame Zeit, ihr Kennenlernen, an das, was sie liebten und verloren. Aber während sie in Vergangenem schwelgen, müssen sie erkennen, dass ihre Töchter ihnen in ihrem rebellischen Wesen in nichts nachstehen.
Es ist diese wärmende, behagliche Atmosphäre, die Tomi Obaros Debütroman „Freundin bleibst du immer“ (OT: Dele Weds Destiny: A Novel, aus dem Englischen von Stefanie Ochel) zu einem absoluten Wohlfühlbuch macht – trotz dessen das Leben der drei Freundinnen Enitan, Funmi und Zainab nicht immer einfach war. Aus ihren jeweiligen Perspektiven beschreibt die Autorin ihr Zusammentreffen, ihre familiären Hintergründe und persönlichen Schicksale. Sie alle hatten einst Träume, wollten Geschichten schreiben, Krankenschwester werden, ein sicheres, gutes Leben führen und Teil einer liebevollen Familie sein. Ihrem ersten Zusammentreffen Anfang der 1980er Jahre an der Universität Zaria gingen Neid und Abschätzigkeit voraus, Überheblichkeit prallte auf Schüchternheit und Bewunderung, doch allmählich rauften sie sich zusammen, waren aufeinander angewiesen und stärkten sich stets gegenseitig den Rücken: in Gesundheit, in Krankheit, in anderen Umständen. Als es 1987 bei studentischen Aufständen zu einem tödlichen Unglück kommt, verändert sich alles und ihre Wege trennen sich.
Mit ausdrucksstarker, schwereloser Sprache und spielerischer Leichtigkeit entwirft Obaro drei grundverschiedene Protagonistinnen, die man sofort ins Herz schließt. Ihre Entwicklung von der Studienzeit bis hin ins Erwachsenenalter, von jungen, zuversichtlichen Mädchen zu vom Leben gezeichneten Müttern, die sich nun in ihren Töchtern gespielt sehen, hat mich mitgerissen, mein Herz mit jedem Auf und Ab tanzen lassen. Sie gibt einen wertvollen, lebendigen Einblick in das Leben in Nigeria, die Klassenunterschiede und gesellschaftlichen wie kulturellen Besonderheiten gegenüber der westlichen Kultur, insbesondere der Hochzeitszeremonie. Darüber hinaus thematisiert sie Rassismus aufgrund von Hautfarbe und Aussehen, Gewalt und sexuellen Missbrauch sowie Abtreibung und psychische Erkrankungen, lässt immer wieder auch den Konflikt der Generationen zwischen Tradition und Moderne durchscheinen. Teilweise werden einzelne Aspekte nur oberflächlich behandelt, wie eine Randerscheinung, doch das tut der Atmosphäre der Erzählung keinen Abbruch, lässt sie eher ausgewogen erscheinen. Lediglich das flüchtige Betrachten der psychischen Probleme ließ mich ein wenig grummeln; hier hätte ich mir mehr Tiefe und Dialog gewünscht.
Müsste ich mich festlegen, ich denke, ich wäre Team Enitan; mit ihrer bodenständigen, ehrlichen Art und ihrer „Begeisterung“ für WhatsApp-Gifs sowie dem Risiko, das sie für die Liebe eingegangen ist, ist sie mir sofort ans Herz gewachsen und ihr Mut imponiert mir. Und doch sind sie alle unglaublich liebenswert und ich habe die gemeinsame Zeit mit den drei Frauen und ihren Töchtern sehr genossen. Eine sommerliche Leseempfehlung!
Es ist diese wärmende, behagliche Atmosphäre, die Tomi Obaros Debütroman „Freundin bleibst du immer“ (OT: Dele Weds Destiny: A Novel, aus dem Englischen von Stefanie Ochel) zu einem absoluten Wohlfühlbuch macht – trotz dessen das Leben der drei Freundinnen Enitan, Funmi und Zainab nicht immer einfach war. Aus ihren jeweiligen Perspektiven beschreibt die Autorin ihr Zusammentreffen, ihre familiären Hintergründe und persönlichen Schicksale. Sie alle hatten einst Träume, wollten Geschichten schreiben, Krankenschwester werden, ein sicheres, gutes Leben führen und Teil einer liebevollen Familie sein. Ihrem ersten Zusammentreffen Anfang der 1980er Jahre an der Universität Zaria gingen Neid und Abschätzigkeit voraus, Überheblichkeit prallte auf Schüchternheit und Bewunderung, doch allmählich rauften sie sich zusammen, waren aufeinander angewiesen und stärkten sich stets gegenseitig den Rücken: in Gesundheit, in Krankheit, in anderen Umständen. Als es 1987 bei studentischen Aufständen zu einem tödlichen Unglück kommt, verändert sich alles und ihre Wege trennen sich.
Mit ausdrucksstarker, schwereloser Sprache und spielerischer Leichtigkeit entwirft Obaro drei grundverschiedene Protagonistinnen, die man sofort ins Herz schließt. Ihre Entwicklung von der Studienzeit bis hin ins Erwachsenenalter, von jungen, zuversichtlichen Mädchen zu vom Leben gezeichneten Müttern, die sich nun in ihren Töchtern gespielt sehen, hat mich mitgerissen, mein Herz mit jedem Auf und Ab tanzen lassen. Sie gibt einen wertvollen, lebendigen Einblick in das Leben in Nigeria, die Klassenunterschiede und gesellschaftlichen wie kulturellen Besonderheiten gegenüber der westlichen Kultur, insbesondere der Hochzeitszeremonie. Darüber hinaus thematisiert sie Rassismus aufgrund von Hautfarbe und Aussehen, Gewalt und sexuellen Missbrauch sowie Abtreibung und psychische Erkrankungen, lässt immer wieder auch den Konflikt der Generationen zwischen Tradition und Moderne durchscheinen. Teilweise werden einzelne Aspekte nur oberflächlich behandelt, wie eine Randerscheinung, doch das tut der Atmosphäre der Erzählung keinen Abbruch, lässt sie eher ausgewogen erscheinen. Lediglich das flüchtige Betrachten der psychischen Probleme ließ mich ein wenig grummeln; hier hätte ich mir mehr Tiefe und Dialog gewünscht.
Müsste ich mich festlegen, ich denke, ich wäre Team Enitan; mit ihrer bodenständigen, ehrlichen Art und ihrer „Begeisterung“ für WhatsApp-Gifs sowie dem Risiko, das sie für die Liebe eingegangen ist, ist sie mir sofort ans Herz gewachsen und ihr Mut imponiert mir. Und doch sind sie alle unglaublich liebenswert und ich habe die gemeinsame Zeit mit den drei Frauen und ihren Töchtern sehr genossen. Eine sommerliche Leseempfehlung!
July 6, 2022
Review for German edition not allowed until the end of July
July 1, 2022
QOTD: Do you have that group of friends that you used to be close to but no longer are?
This book is a lesson on female friendship, relationships, motherhood, care-giving, love, obedience, growth and acceptance seen through the lens of understanding and cultural appreciation.
On the surface level this book follows three friends, Funmi, Enitan and Zainab who met when they attended a University in Zaria, Kaduna (a state in the Northern part of Nigeria for those who are not Nigerians - also from this point on in the review, I will not further explain any in-depth culture rich references; if you want to know more, please do search it up - I am tired of African writers over explaining things that their readership can understand; begs the question, who are you writing for? - I am glad that I did not have to worry about that in this book - Tomi explained enough to maintain relevance which I absolutely love and appreciated - Anyways back to the review).
Over the years, life have taken them down different paths until they finally reunite for the first time in 30 years for Funmi's daughter 's wedding. Enitan arrives back in Nigeria with her daughter Remi who is still upset with her for getting a divorce. Zainab refusing to accept Funmi's help to cover airfare is robbed at gunpoint on her way from Kaduna for the wedding. With this brief introduction to the characters we get to know about them and their current view on life, with Funmi shifting her dissatisfaction with her own marriage to planning an elaborate wedding for her daughter who does not seem enthusiastic enough about the whole ceremony; we see Enitan struggling to understand her biracial daughter who is struggling to find a place in the world (the world of protests, gun violence, equality and environmental consciousness); and Zainab who is her husband's care-giver after he suffered a stroke that left her to look after their four children.
.
Then Tomi takes us back to when the three of them were young and in love, when growth was not a thing to fear but something to seek and embrace. I don't want to spoil it; so just read it. I would have loved if we alternated between past and present a bit more rather than just have a block of the content; It would have heightened my anticipation, especially when it came to Zainab relationship with her father's friend and Funmi's & Zainab's relationship with Damola.
.
It did end a bit abruptly in my opinion because I would have thoroughly enjoyed the commotion that would have been a result of Destiny's decision but that is just me and my thirst for drama.
.
It is a beautiful story.
Trigger warning
Political strife
Abortion
Death
Self-harm
*Thanks to Hodder Studio for making an ARC of this book available to me.
This book is a lesson on female friendship, relationships, motherhood, care-giving, love, obedience, growth and acceptance seen through the lens of understanding and cultural appreciation.
On the surface level this book follows three friends, Funmi, Enitan and Zainab who met when they attended a University in Zaria, Kaduna (a state in the Northern part of Nigeria for those who are not Nigerians - also from this point on in the review, I will not further explain any in-depth culture rich references; if you want to know more, please do search it up - I am tired of African writers over explaining things that their readership can understand; begs the question, who are you writing for? - I am glad that I did not have to worry about that in this book - Tomi explained enough to maintain relevance which I absolutely love and appreciated - Anyways back to the review).
Over the years, life have taken them down different paths until they finally reunite for the first time in 30 years for Funmi's daughter 's wedding. Enitan arrives back in Nigeria with her daughter Remi who is still upset with her for getting a divorce. Zainab refusing to accept Funmi's help to cover airfare is robbed at gunpoint on her way from Kaduna for the wedding. With this brief introduction to the characters we get to know about them and their current view on life, with Funmi shifting her dissatisfaction with her own marriage to planning an elaborate wedding for her daughter who does not seem enthusiastic enough about the whole ceremony; we see Enitan struggling to understand her biracial daughter who is struggling to find a place in the world (the world of protests, gun violence, equality and environmental consciousness); and Zainab who is her husband's care-giver after he suffered a stroke that left her to look after their four children.
.
Then Tomi takes us back to when the three of them were young and in love, when growth was not a thing to fear but something to seek and embrace. I don't want to spoil it; so just read it. I would have loved if we alternated between past and present a bit more rather than just have a block of the content; It would have heightened my anticipation, especially when it came to Zainab relationship with her father's friend and Funmi's & Zainab's relationship with Damola.
.
It did end a bit abruptly in my opinion because I would have thoroughly enjoyed the commotion that would have been a result of Destiny's decision but that is just me and my thirst for drama.
.
It is a beautiful story.
Trigger warning
Political strife
Abortion
Death
Self-harm
*Thanks to Hodder Studio for making an ARC of this book available to me.
July 15, 2022
"Freundin bleibst du immer" hat mich neugierig gemacht. Da es vor allem auf Instagram häufig gezeigt wurde.
Tomi Obaro schreibt über die Geschichte dreier Frauen, die sich während der Unizeit kennen lernen und zu Freundinnen werden. Sie haben sich mehr oder weniger nach der gemeinsamen Unizeit aus den Augen verloren, bis Funmis Tochter Destiny im Dezember 2015 heiratet.
Das erste Drittel war für mich recht gut. Der Schreibstil ließ sich flüssig lesen, allerdings wusste man nicht so richtig, wohin die Geschichte verlaufen wird. Das zweite Drittel hat mich dagegen total verloren. Der Schreibstil und die kurzen Kapitel waren weiterhin gut, aber die Geschichte um die drei Freundinnen hat mich leider nicht mehr fesseln und begeistern können. An dieser Situation konnte leider auch das letzte Drittel nichts mehr ändern. Als Leser kehrt mensch zwar wieder ins Jahr 2015 und somit zur Hochzeit zurück, aber auch das war für mich alles sehr vorhersehbar nach dem ersten Verhalten von Destiny.
Leider habe ich mir von dem Buch deutlich mehr erwartet. Mehr Freundschaft, mehr Tiefe. Diese hat mir leider komplett gefehlt.
Tomi Obaro schreibt über die Geschichte dreier Frauen, die sich während der Unizeit kennen lernen und zu Freundinnen werden. Sie haben sich mehr oder weniger nach der gemeinsamen Unizeit aus den Augen verloren, bis Funmis Tochter Destiny im Dezember 2015 heiratet.
Das erste Drittel war für mich recht gut. Der Schreibstil ließ sich flüssig lesen, allerdings wusste man nicht so richtig, wohin die Geschichte verlaufen wird. Das zweite Drittel hat mich dagegen total verloren. Der Schreibstil und die kurzen Kapitel waren weiterhin gut, aber die Geschichte um die drei Freundinnen hat mich leider nicht mehr fesseln und begeistern können. An dieser Situation konnte leider auch das letzte Drittel nichts mehr ändern. Als Leser kehrt mensch zwar wieder ins Jahr 2015 und somit zur Hochzeit zurück, aber auch das war für mich alles sehr vorhersehbar nach dem ersten Verhalten von Destiny.
Leider habe ich mir von dem Buch deutlich mehr erwartet. Mehr Freundschaft, mehr Tiefe. Diese hat mir leider komplett gefehlt.
February 3, 2022
A romp! A delight!
August 27, 2024
Was eine spannende Geschichte und genau mein Ding hätte werden können hatte leider ein hartes Stil Problem. Ich bin durch den sachlich-informativen Stil überhaupt nicht an die Charaktere rangekommen und der eigentlich interessanteste Mittelteil fühlte sich wie ein Infodump an. Missed potential.
September 21, 2025
langweilig. lest Dream count.
September 3, 2022
✨🆂🅴🆅🅴🅽 🅻🅸🆃 🆃🅷🅸🅽🅶🆂 ✨
|| 𝐃𝐞𝐥𝐞 𝐖𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐲 by Tomi Obara ||
𝗜𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲?
* Yes, I think the author can tell a good story, but there was some lost potential here. Good writing style, but something was missing.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗮𝘃𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿: (spoiler here)
* In this novel, my favorite character is Funmi because in the end, she picked her daughter Destiny over the shame, perception, and traditions tied to Nigerian culture. Funmi’s strong and determined personality is a great character trait that she must learn to pass down to her daughter Destiny in a tangible way so she can even stand up to her mother effectively.
𝗠𝗮𝗷𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆:
* One major takeaway for me that is Obara does not shame, judge, or penalize the women in this novel for the decisions they make for their lives even when Nigerian culture and society would definitely do so. Their sister friends provide support and a balm for them, which is quite comforting in times of distress or pain.
𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲𝘀/𝘀𝘂𝗯𝗷𝗲𝗰𝘁𝘀:
* Female Bonds/Friendships
* Mother-daughter relationships
* Political Unrest
𝗗𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆?
* Nope, not at all. Has nothing to do with the characters or plot.
𝗗𝗶𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘁/𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂?
* The plot was somewhat entertaining b/c it was mostly character driven. It went from present to past tense narration between Funmi, Enitan, & Zainab and the daughters Remi and Destiny about class, sex, love, and politics. There should have been more drama and more development in some parts.
𝗜𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝗱?
* I really disliked the abrupt ending the most. The novel had reached an exciting moment with Destiny & Funmi, and then BOOM it ends, and the reader is left to just ponder what happens. One thing is obvious, but an EPILOGUE, please and thank you.
|| 𝐃𝐞𝐥𝐞 𝐖𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐲 by Tomi Obara ||
𝗜𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲?
* Yes, I think the author can tell a good story, but there was some lost potential here. Good writing style, but something was missing.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗮𝘃𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿: (spoiler here)
* In this novel, my favorite character is Funmi because in the end, she picked her daughter Destiny over the shame, perception, and traditions tied to Nigerian culture. Funmi’s strong and determined personality is a great character trait that she must learn to pass down to her daughter Destiny in a tangible way so she can even stand up to her mother effectively.
𝗠𝗮𝗷𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆:
* One major takeaway for me that is Obara does not shame, judge, or penalize the women in this novel for the decisions they make for their lives even when Nigerian culture and society would definitely do so. Their sister friends provide support and a balm for them, which is quite comforting in times of distress or pain.
𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲𝘀/𝘀𝘂𝗯𝗷𝗲𝗰𝘁𝘀:
* Female Bonds/Friendships
* Mother-daughter relationships
* Political Unrest
𝗗𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆?
* Nope, not at all. Has nothing to do with the characters or plot.
𝗗𝗶𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘁/𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂?
* The plot was somewhat entertaining b/c it was mostly character driven. It went from present to past tense narration between Funmi, Enitan, & Zainab and the daughters Remi and Destiny about class, sex, love, and politics. There should have been more drama and more development in some parts.
𝗜𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝗱?
* I really disliked the abrupt ending the most. The novel had reached an exciting moment with Destiny & Funmi, and then BOOM it ends, and the reader is left to just ponder what happens. One thing is obvious, but an EPILOGUE, please and thank you.
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