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Bang Bang Crash
An insightful memoir-in-essays about a rock-and-roll drummer who risks his successful career to pursue his true dream and discovers a greater understanding of artistic fulfillment
In the mid-1990s, fresh out of high school, Nic Brown was living his childhood dream as a rock-and-roll drummer. Signing record deals, playing big shows, hitting the charts, giving interviews in Rolling Stone, appearing on The Tonight Show--what could be better for a young artist? Yet contrary to expectations, getting a shot at his artistic dream early in life was a destabilizing shock. The more he achieved, the more accolades that came his way, the less sure Brown became about his convictions. Only a few years into a promising musical career, he discovered the crux of his discontent: he was never meant to remain behind the drums. In fact, his true artistic path lay in a radically different direction entirely. Switching course, he decides to become a writer, embarking on a journey that leads him to attend the Iowa Writers' Workshop, publish novels and short stories, and teach literature to college students across the country.
Bang Bang Crash tells of Nic Brown's unusual journey about how he gains new strength, presence of mind, and sense of perspective, enabling him to discover an even greater life of artistic fulfillment.
In the mid-1990s, fresh out of high school, Nic Brown was living his childhood dream as a rock-and-roll drummer. Signing record deals, playing big shows, hitting the charts, giving interviews in Rolling Stone, appearing on The Tonight Show--what could be better for a young artist? Yet contrary to expectations, getting a shot at his artistic dream early in life was a destabilizing shock. The more he achieved, the more accolades that came his way, the less sure Brown became about his convictions. Only a few years into a promising musical career, he discovered the crux of his discontent: he was never meant to remain behind the drums. In fact, his true artistic path lay in a radically different direction entirely. Switching course, he decides to become a writer, embarking on a journey that leads him to attend the Iowa Writers' Workshop, publish novels and short stories, and teach literature to college students across the country.
Bang Bang Crash tells of Nic Brown's unusual journey about how he gains new strength, presence of mind, and sense of perspective, enabling him to discover an even greater life of artistic fulfillment.
224 pages, Paperback
Published February 21, 2023
4 people are currently reading
2173 people want to read
About the author
Nic Brown
5 books38 followersNic Brown is the author of the memoir Bang Bang Crash, as well as the novels In Every Way, Doubles, and Floodmarkers, which was selected as an Editors' Choice by The New York Times Book Review. His writing has appeared in The New York Times, Oxford American, and the Harvard Review, among many other publications. A graduate of Columbia University and the Iowa Writers' Workshop, he has served as the Grisham Writer-in-Residence at the University of Mississippi and is now a professor of creative writing at Clemson University.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
March 2, 2023
I’ve been in a reading funk recently and this memoir turned out to be just what I needed. Nic's rising youthful enthusiasm for music, achievement of his dreams, and the resultant ambivalence about his career and ultimate switch from drumming to writing, I found it all unsurspringly readable and enjoyable -- “unsurprising” because I read his related essay along these lines in Bring the Noise: The Best Pop Culture Essays from Barrelhouse Magazine ten years ago and definitely thought it should be extended to book length. Nic's writing in a way emerges from his experience in music, his musical and literary taste seem on the same side of the aesthetic continuum -- that is, the way he describes the music he played (“execution, control, tight pop craftsmanship”) syncs with the kind of writing he prefers (“sharp detail, evocation of place, three-dimensional characters, conflict, and scene building”), all of which makes for an enjoyable, insightful, well-observed memoir driven by the author's 3D-character development as he resolves his inner conflict about his career in music.
Loved its clear, moving, flowing evocations of youthful emergence into music, that fizzing initial inspired spirit, driving around listening to first demos as the world otherwise disappeared (I had a similar experience at sixteen or so after recording original songs on a four-track with a multi-instrumentalist virtuoso friend). Loved it also for how he handles the bits about his old Black jazz teacher coming to his big white house on Country Club Drive in Greensboro, NC, how the teacher thought there was something significant about being welcome there and respected as a teacher, and how the jazz drum teacher reminded me of Jim McPherson, the gnomic genius of a professor at the Workshop who both Nic and I had in different semesters but worked the same sort of magic on us, like a sort of judo master, just barely deflecting the energy and interest we brought to him in a way that let us lead ourselves to the necessary discovery.
I was never in a workshop with Nic and didn’t really get to know him until our second year but I knew Nic was a reluctant former drummer because during our second year in Iowa City I invited him once or twice to jam with me and a poet friend with whom I’d relieve the bends of immersion in fiction writing and recalibrate our aesthetic compasses until controls were dead-set for the heart of the sun. Something like that. Highly rhythmic Sonic Youth/VU/Viola Lee Blues-style jamming that would've gone to the next level if Nic agreed to bring his drums down one day. If he’d played with us, there would've been another chapter in this wherein he experienced the numen in sound and created music that had no ambition other than to appear in the moment, not even recorded on a phone (phones didn't do that at the time, 2005-6), not a project, not something for publication, something more like devotional music or innerspace exploration, the achievement of totally sober, tonally altered states. Alas, Nic's drums stayed in his basement. Little did I know at the time that he had been a touring musician whose band Athenaeum once had a hit song on the radio and who had essentially burned out after that experience and a few years in NYC as a session sideman, mostly playing for major label pop-rock acts.
Loved also the parts after leaving Iowa City, the eerie blessed synchronicity of receiving word from his agent that they had an offer for his first book while his wife was giving birth to their daughter, followed exactly ten years later by a total eclipse, or the chapter about ecstatically winning a point off a former professional tennis player friend, or accompanying his young daughter’s shambling jazz band, or the bit about the fake ID given away when he turned 21 returning after his band’s 20th anniversary show. Loved also the peculiarities regarding tooth-grinding as a sort of drum set he plays inside his mouth and not being able to really hear lyrics (which seemed completely foreign to me).
Really just an enjoyable reading experience, highly recommended to all (no need to be a writer or a musician). I’ll resist the impulse to compare the book with a pop song but the comparison fits – there’s nothing indulgent about this book, nothing really conceivably unnecessary or digressive or “artsy” or divergent. The author was a supportive sideman, after all, not a soloist (not a single mention of Bonham’s “Moby Dick” or Peart’s “YYZ,” eg). The reader, really, is the one he’s backing with this book – even if he’s the one telling the story and all details arise from his life, it’s the reader’s comfort and enjoyment he seems most concerned about, the language always serving the story and moving it ahead one steady beat at a time. (Couldn’t resist that last phrase, sorry!)
Loved its clear, moving, flowing evocations of youthful emergence into music, that fizzing initial inspired spirit, driving around listening to first demos as the world otherwise disappeared (I had a similar experience at sixteen or so after recording original songs on a four-track with a multi-instrumentalist virtuoso friend). Loved it also for how he handles the bits about his old Black jazz teacher coming to his big white house on Country Club Drive in Greensboro, NC, how the teacher thought there was something significant about being welcome there and respected as a teacher, and how the jazz drum teacher reminded me of Jim McPherson, the gnomic genius of a professor at the Workshop who both Nic and I had in different semesters but worked the same sort of magic on us, like a sort of judo master, just barely deflecting the energy and interest we brought to him in a way that let us lead ourselves to the necessary discovery.
I was never in a workshop with Nic and didn’t really get to know him until our second year but I knew Nic was a reluctant former drummer because during our second year in Iowa City I invited him once or twice to jam with me and a poet friend with whom I’d relieve the bends of immersion in fiction writing and recalibrate our aesthetic compasses until controls were dead-set for the heart of the sun. Something like that. Highly rhythmic Sonic Youth/VU/Viola Lee Blues-style jamming that would've gone to the next level if Nic agreed to bring his drums down one day. If he’d played with us, there would've been another chapter in this wherein he experienced the numen in sound and created music that had no ambition other than to appear in the moment, not even recorded on a phone (phones didn't do that at the time, 2005-6), not a project, not something for publication, something more like devotional music or innerspace exploration, the achievement of totally sober, tonally altered states. Alas, Nic's drums stayed in his basement. Little did I know at the time that he had been a touring musician whose band Athenaeum once had a hit song on the radio and who had essentially burned out after that experience and a few years in NYC as a session sideman, mostly playing for major label pop-rock acts.
Loved also the parts after leaving Iowa City, the eerie blessed synchronicity of receiving word from his agent that they had an offer for his first book while his wife was giving birth to their daughter, followed exactly ten years later by a total eclipse, or the chapter about ecstatically winning a point off a former professional tennis player friend, or accompanying his young daughter’s shambling jazz band, or the bit about the fake ID given away when he turned 21 returning after his band’s 20th anniversary show. Loved also the peculiarities regarding tooth-grinding as a sort of drum set he plays inside his mouth and not being able to really hear lyrics (which seemed completely foreign to me).
Really just an enjoyable reading experience, highly recommended to all (no need to be a writer or a musician). I’ll resist the impulse to compare the book with a pop song but the comparison fits – there’s nothing indulgent about this book, nothing really conceivably unnecessary or digressive or “artsy” or divergent. The author was a supportive sideman, after all, not a soloist (not a single mention of Bonham’s “Moby Dick” or Peart’s “YYZ,” eg). The reader, really, is the one he’s backing with this book – even if he’s the one telling the story and all details arise from his life, it’s the reader’s comfort and enjoyment he seems most concerned about, the language always serving the story and moving it ahead one steady beat at a time. (Couldn’t resist that last phrase, sorry!)
November 28, 2022
Although Brown is best known as a writer/editor and teaches creative writing at Clemson, this is a short memoir about his musical education, including the decade he was a drummer for a regionally popular alt rock band, and his struggle to figure out why he gave it all up. His band Athenaeum's biggest hit, "What I Didn't Know," reminded me of "Gin Blossoms." I didn't know the band, and I went looking for more about them: like the song, the book was hard to get out of my head.
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February 24, 2023I generally pick up a memoir for one of two reasons: I want the dirt that xyz super famous celebrity is dishing or there’s something about the person’s story I feel like I could learn from. I was drawn to BANG BANG CRASH by Nic Brown for the latter of these two reasons and ended up connecting with it even more than I expected.
Brown’s memoir is about his journey to become a successful drummer, then away from music to become a writer. Pretty early in the book, I looked up the most “famous” of the bands he played with, wondering if I knew any of their music. Right away I found myself singing along to a song I haven’t heard in a few decades, somehow still knowing the lyrics when I couldn’t tell you what I ate for lunch two days ago. Music is funny and beautiful that way, how it can dig down deep and stick with you for so long.
I wasn’t expecting all the memories of my own high school experience that surfaced while reading. Going in I didn’t realize that Brown grew up in Greensboro, NC. His stories recalled my own youth across the state in Wilmington, following the bands of high school friends through the late ‘90s and early ‘00s. Brown’s writing holds a great nostalgia with the hazy uncertainty that decades gone by give to the specific details of our past. But it also has the clarity of hindsight, the wisdom that comes with age.
I’m always fascinated with the idea that we are supposed to know what we want to do with our lives from a fairly young age and we aren’t supposed to deviate from that. I’m knocking on the door of 40 and I still don’t know what I want to do. Or it’s not just one thing, at least. What Brown does so well here is reflect how our dreams can sometimes feel hollow when they actually end up coming true. And sometimes I guess that’s what it takes to try out a different path. My life, at least, has been a lot of trial and error.
All the rambling and personal reflection aside, if you love music or writing or just the idea that, if we are lucky, we live multiple lives during this time we have on earth, then go pick this one up. You won’t regret it!
Many thanks to the publisher for gifting me a copy of this wonderful read. All thoughts and opinions expressed here are entirely my own.
Brown’s memoir is about his journey to become a successful drummer, then away from music to become a writer. Pretty early in the book, I looked up the most “famous” of the bands he played with, wondering if I knew any of their music. Right away I found myself singing along to a song I haven’t heard in a few decades, somehow still knowing the lyrics when I couldn’t tell you what I ate for lunch two days ago. Music is funny and beautiful that way, how it can dig down deep and stick with you for so long.
I wasn’t expecting all the memories of my own high school experience that surfaced while reading. Going in I didn’t realize that Brown grew up in Greensboro, NC. His stories recalled my own youth across the state in Wilmington, following the bands of high school friends through the late ‘90s and early ‘00s. Brown’s writing holds a great nostalgia with the hazy uncertainty that decades gone by give to the specific details of our past. But it also has the clarity of hindsight, the wisdom that comes with age.
I’m always fascinated with the idea that we are supposed to know what we want to do with our lives from a fairly young age and we aren’t supposed to deviate from that. I’m knocking on the door of 40 and I still don’t know what I want to do. Or it’s not just one thing, at least. What Brown does so well here is reflect how our dreams can sometimes feel hollow when they actually end up coming true. And sometimes I guess that’s what it takes to try out a different path. My life, at least, has been a lot of trial and error.
All the rambling and personal reflection aside, if you love music or writing or just the idea that, if we are lucky, we live multiple lives during this time we have on earth, then go pick this one up. You won’t regret it!
Many thanks to the publisher for gifting me a copy of this wonderful read. All thoughts and opinions expressed here are entirely my own.
January 5, 2023
Novelist Brown (In Every Way) used to be a drummer, which he often doesn’t want people to know. He deftly brings readers along on a journey of self-discovery and acceptance in his raw and melodic memoir that introduces readers to a young boy passionate for drumming and the man who loses that passion. In the mid-1990s, fresh out of high school, Brown played drums in a rock ’n’ roll band that was signed to a major label. He toured the country, appeared on television, and had a hit song. But he was not sure it was the path he wanted to be on. Realizing he wanted to become a writer, he quit music, went to college, attended the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, and now has a successful career as a writer and creative-writing professor. Told with brilliant writing, this story is filled with introspection and both laugh-out-loud and cringeworthy moments.
VERDICT This poignant memoir will not only be loved by music fans but will also likely appeal to readers who want to go on a journey of love, ambivalence, and acceptance.
(https://www.libraryjournal.com/review...)
VERDICT This poignant memoir will not only be loved by music fans but will also likely appeal to readers who want to go on a journey of love, ambivalence, and acceptance.
(https://www.libraryjournal.com/review...)
July 17, 2024
Favorite chapters- Sleep and Other Musicians.
I noticed other reviewers said they really liked the early childhood part. I liked the part once he graduated high school. Maybe it’s because I knew the 5th grader with the long bangs and Helter Skelter playing in his Walkman. He even made me a Beatles fan. So maybe I like the touring part because that is The part that began when my memories ended.
The chapter called Sleep portrayed the whirlwindy dissonance of the whole experience. At least that’s what it felt like to me as I read it. That chapter evoked the same feelings I got from watching the movie Lost In Translation. And I’m not the writer Nic is so I can’t put it into words very well.:) but it’s a feeling that i can connect with , even though I’ve never experienced living abroad in Japan or being a drummer on the road .
I was surprised to find myself laughing out loud throughout the book. The story of Jared Falcon and the Other Musicians chapters especially!! However with the chapter on Falcon! band’s “origin story”, how do we know Nic didn’t do it again when he described each person?! Either way the creativity to fabricate that detail, or the creativity to pull out the truthful quirky memories/ qualities about each individual that says so much within one to five sentences per person was brilliant. And loved the photos. Especially the puppet one!! And classic Joey picture with the tie off kilter. Kudos to the photographer – did not see photo credits, I’m assuming it was the author.
Nic- if you read this- You are creative as hell as always! Thank you for doing it again.
I noticed other reviewers said they really liked the early childhood part. I liked the part once he graduated high school. Maybe it’s because I knew the 5th grader with the long bangs and Helter Skelter playing in his Walkman. He even made me a Beatles fan. So maybe I like the touring part because that is The part that began when my memories ended.
The chapter called Sleep portrayed the whirlwindy dissonance of the whole experience. At least that’s what it felt like to me as I read it. That chapter evoked the same feelings I got from watching the movie Lost In Translation. And I’m not the writer Nic is so I can’t put it into words very well.:) but it’s a feeling that i can connect with , even though I’ve never experienced living abroad in Japan or being a drummer on the road .
I was surprised to find myself laughing out loud throughout the book. The story of Jared Falcon and the Other Musicians chapters especially!! However with the chapter on Falcon! band’s “origin story”, how do we know Nic didn’t do it again when he described each person?! Either way the creativity to fabricate that detail, or the creativity to pull out the truthful quirky memories/ qualities about each individual that says so much within one to five sentences per person was brilliant. And loved the photos. Especially the puppet one!! And classic Joey picture with the tie off kilter. Kudos to the photographer – did not see photo credits, I’m assuming it was the author.
Nic- if you read this- You are creative as hell as always! Thank you for doing it again.
August 13, 2023
Interesting read about Nic's career. I didn't know anything about him before reading. Enjoyed the first part of the book that centered around growing up and learning to love playing the drums.
March 3, 2023
I might be a little biased knowing the author as the drummer of one of my favorite bands. But this book is an excellent read for anyone who has been embarrassed about changing their path and dreams.
May 17, 2023
Athenaeum is one of my all-time favorite bands. I've seen them live probably dozens of time in the late 90's and early 00's. One of my first official dates with my now-husband was to see Athenaeum at Tremont Music Hall (which is now high-end condos). So, when I saw this book and realized it was a memoir of the original drummer with Athenaeum I couldn't wait to read it. Brown is a great writer and I absolutely loved the first 1/3 of the book where he talks about his childhood, how he got into playing the drums, and starting Athenaeum with Mark Kano. That section really took me back and it was fun to read about the band from the insider perspective. Brown graduated from high school right when the band really took off and a record deal was imminent. He was accepted to Duke, Columbia University, and Princeton and turned them all down to be a rock star. But, shortly after Athenaeum signs a record deal with Atlantic Records Brown starts being embarrassed by their music. I could never really figure that out. He talked so highly of Mark Kano and the connection they had in making music, but didn't seem to enjoy music at all once they were "successful." He tried playing with some other bands when he quit Athenaeum and went to Columbia University. Eventually he starts writing and is now a published author and professor at Clemson University. He is still reluctant to talk about his time in the band and seems embarrassed by it. But, it was his idea to do the reunion show for the 20th anniversary of the Radiance album (which I had tickets to and then my husband got the flu and I couldn't find anyone to go with me at the last minute so I missed it). By the end I found this whole book odd. Once he started being embarrassed of Athenaeum's music I started not liking him as much. I really don't understand why he seems so embarrassed and almost ashamed of his time in the band and as a musician. I don't know why Athenaeum never made it bigger after their record deal, but in this book I was hoping for more time with the band and less in Brown's head.
I was also super disappointed with his drum teacher Pete. Once Brown started playing with Mark Kano and Athenaeum was forming he played some of their music for Pete. Pete was VERY into jazz and showed his disappointment that Brown was playing rock 'n roll instead of jazz. I think that opened the door to Brown being embarrassed of Athenaeum because he looked up so much to Pete. I don't know why Pete couldn't have been happy for Brown's success at the time even if it wasn't his personal taste.
Some quotes I liked:
"You spend hours in the attic with Mark, who can already drive, so sometimes when you get home from school his red Nissan pickup truck is already parked at the curb. Inside, his baby sister will be sitting on the chopping block with your mother, who will say hi, and then you will rush upstairs to find Mark working on a song called "Summertime." Or you will find him working on a song called "Haircut." Or you will find him working on a song called "On My Mind," a song that after you play it with him for the first time fills you with such amazement that later you lay on your bed imagining just what it means about your life to have been involved in its creation." (p. 3-4)
"And how great is it that you get to make that music with Mark? Because Mark is, why not admit it, so much more talented than you are. He has a gift so great as to be almost a burden to him. He hears things you cannot - that the harmony is off, oh, the compression is too much, I need to adjust my new chorus pedal et cetera, et cetera - and these things that he hears complicates his life much more than your life is complicated...And Mark has also become your closest friend, something you can now look back on and see clearly, but at the time you would never acknowledge, because already you and Mark treat each other like something beyond merely friends. Friends hang out and have fun. You two, though - it's a type of human alchemy. You create magic from nothing, just pulling sound from the air." (p. 5)
"The main complication for me was that, as a drummer, I'd been yoked to the projects of others for so many years that now, as a writer, I had suddenly become so intoxicated by the opportunity to have an artistic project be all my own that any hour potentially spent working on someone else's art seemed like a waste of my time." (p. 106)
I was also super disappointed with his drum teacher Pete. Once Brown started playing with Mark Kano and Athenaeum was forming he played some of their music for Pete. Pete was VERY into jazz and showed his disappointment that Brown was playing rock 'n roll instead of jazz. I think that opened the door to Brown being embarrassed of Athenaeum because he looked up so much to Pete. I don't know why Pete couldn't have been happy for Brown's success at the time even if it wasn't his personal taste.
Some quotes I liked:
"You spend hours in the attic with Mark, who can already drive, so sometimes when you get home from school his red Nissan pickup truck is already parked at the curb. Inside, his baby sister will be sitting on the chopping block with your mother, who will say hi, and then you will rush upstairs to find Mark working on a song called "Summertime." Or you will find him working on a song called "Haircut." Or you will find him working on a song called "On My Mind," a song that after you play it with him for the first time fills you with such amazement that later you lay on your bed imagining just what it means about your life to have been involved in its creation." (p. 3-4)
"And how great is it that you get to make that music with Mark? Because Mark is, why not admit it, so much more talented than you are. He has a gift so great as to be almost a burden to him. He hears things you cannot - that the harmony is off, oh, the compression is too much, I need to adjust my new chorus pedal et cetera, et cetera - and these things that he hears complicates his life much more than your life is complicated...And Mark has also become your closest friend, something you can now look back on and see clearly, but at the time you would never acknowledge, because already you and Mark treat each other like something beyond merely friends. Friends hang out and have fun. You two, though - it's a type of human alchemy. You create magic from nothing, just pulling sound from the air." (p. 5)
"The main complication for me was that, as a drummer, I'd been yoked to the projects of others for so many years that now, as a writer, I had suddenly become so intoxicated by the opportunity to have an artistic project be all my own that any hour potentially spent working on someone else's art seemed like a waste of my time." (p. 106)
September 3, 2023
I’m not sure why this book moved me so much. Partly, it’s because this guy can write. Partly, I think, because I am so tuned into that sense of nostalgia as one looks back at one’s youth. As a bonus, I am fascinated by bands’ origin stories. Whatever the combination of factors is, it compels me to give this book 5 stars, something I seldom do.
April 4, 2023
I had the same takeaway that I read Patrick Swayze’s memoir: You need to be able to survive the death of your dreams.
[Seeing Athenaeum in Charlotte was my first concert I ever chose in the 6th grade. Their album has remained in rotation ever since.]
[Seeing Athenaeum in Charlotte was my first concert I ever chose in the 6th grade. Their album has remained in rotation ever since.]
March 1, 2023
I just spent a week in Nic's head and I'm a better man for it. He's a little embarrassed though. Loved it.
February 24, 2023
I know Nic Brown personally; he was one of my creative-writing professors at Clemson and also on my thesis committee. I consider him a friend, so when I saw this book was coming out, I had to get it, because he also happens to be a damn good writer as well. So this isn't going to be anywhere near an objective review; I'm all in on this book and would be even if it were dull and unreadable. It's neither of those, of course. It's a damn fine memoir.
"Bang Bang Crash" documents Brown's life as the drummer for a band that had a radio hit back in the late Nineties (Athenaeum, "What I Didn't Know"), which I finally looked up on YouTube last night and realized I'd probably heard sometime during the same period, unaware of how our lives would intersect years later when I was obviously the worst student in his creative writing class (or best? Not for me to judge :-p ). The rock and roll dream came true for him, but at a time when he began to chafe against the very thing he thought he wanted, and he got out to pursue a college education and eventually a writing and teaching career, with a few looks back over his shoulder to the drummer he'd once been and the question of whether he could ever do it again.
Nic is a great author, as I've already said, and I think his books show it ("Floodmarkers," "Doubles," and "In Every Way"). But don't take my word for it, read the book. It's the story of someone realizing that what they thought they wanted isn't it after all, and navigating their way to finding something more fulfilling. I think we can all relate to that. Plus, despite all the serious words I've used so far in this review, it's really funny in parts (no more so than the epic story of his fake ID). Like I said earlier, there is no way that I can be objective in my review, but I honestly think anyone picking up this book would enjoy it thoroughly. And I can't wait to read what Nic Brown is working on next.
"Bang Bang Crash" documents Brown's life as the drummer for a band that had a radio hit back in the late Nineties (Athenaeum, "What I Didn't Know"), which I finally looked up on YouTube last night and realized I'd probably heard sometime during the same period, unaware of how our lives would intersect years later when I was obviously the worst student in his creative writing class (or best? Not for me to judge :-p ). The rock and roll dream came true for him, but at a time when he began to chafe against the very thing he thought he wanted, and he got out to pursue a college education and eventually a writing and teaching career, with a few looks back over his shoulder to the drummer he'd once been and the question of whether he could ever do it again.
Nic is a great author, as I've already said, and I think his books show it ("Floodmarkers," "Doubles," and "In Every Way"). But don't take my word for it, read the book. It's the story of someone realizing that what they thought they wanted isn't it after all, and navigating their way to finding something more fulfilling. I think we can all relate to that. Plus, despite all the serious words I've used so far in this review, it's really funny in parts (no more so than the epic story of his fake ID). Like I said earlier, there is no way that I can be objective in my review, but I honestly think anyone picking up this book would enjoy it thoroughly. And I can't wait to read what Nic Brown is working on next.
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February 11, 2024I think with this book I’m done assigning star ratings to books. It feels more oaky for me with movies, where it’s such a communal effort, but books like this, actual accounts of someone’s life, how do I give it 4 or 5 stars? How do you say someone should have written about their life better, or that their life story should have resonated with you more? But anyway ~
This book was a gift from a friend here in NC, a memoir from his writing instructor at Clemson describing the rise and fall of his dream of drumming. Glenn saw the common threads of us having both drummed in our pasts and thought I might resonate. Through the sections of the book grappling with how the dream started to slip away after his band gets a record deal I recalled time in the marching band. So much effort put into music and parts that weren’t truly my own - the band lived before me and lives on after me. I was left feeling wistful for what could have been, if I had been brave enough to dream my own dreams. I would never have dreamed those dreams until my time in the marching band though, so what can you do.
The writer’s anxieties really spiked my own, but I enjoyed the book and the stories from his life.
April 14, 2023
n the mid-1990s, fresh out of high school, Nic Brown was living his childhood dream as a rock and roll drummer. Signing a major label record deal, playing big shows, hitting the charts, giving interviews in Rolling Stone, appearing on The Tonight Show—what could be better for a young artist? But contrary to expectations, getting a shot at his artistic dream early in life was a destabilizing shock. The more he achieved, the more accolades that came his way, the less sure Brown became about his path. Only a few years into a promising musical career, he discovered the crux of his discontent: he was never meant to remain behind the drums. In fact, his true artistic path lay in a radically different direction entirely: he decided to become a writer, embarking on a journey leading him to attend the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, publish novels and short stories, and teach literature to college students across the country. [amazon synopsis]
Who cares? So boring. Know I am in the minority, but wish I had not wasted my time.
Who cares? So boring. Know I am in the minority, but wish I had not wasted my time.
January 9, 2025
This was an awesome little essay memoir for several reasons: first, it's easy listening narrated by Brown himself with soothing revelry in his past. Second, it's not overindulgent or overwritten as Brown recounts his life mostly as a drummer but wrapped around a larger life lived as a routine course of action with a touch of pizzazz. Third, he makes the mundane spectacular-- it's a balance of reflectiveness and forward thinking. And the format makes it special.
Brown's life could have gone one way-- the Ivies-- but he chose to drum. He waxes poetic about his Black drum teacher who he remembers fondly. He was in bands. He had gigs. He couch surfed and stayed up all night. He drummed. But life is life. It's what he did and in that it was special to him. And thus special to the reader to know about who he is.
Memoirs don't have to be about tragic incidents or peculiar ones, they can be about life and this is the perfect example of introspection meeting good writing.
Brown's life could have gone one way-- the Ivies-- but he chose to drum. He waxes poetic about his Black drum teacher who he remembers fondly. He was in bands. He had gigs. He couch surfed and stayed up all night. He drummed. But life is life. It's what he did and in that it was special to him. And thus special to the reader to know about who he is.
Memoirs don't have to be about tragic incidents or peculiar ones, they can be about life and this is the perfect example of introspection meeting good writing.
May 25, 2025
Full disclosure: I am also a drummer and a writer and a survivor of time on Atlantic Records in the 90s, so I am as Target Audience as a reader can get. That could have backfired, too--like, I can be super hard on books about music, and have been known to scoff at movies and books that get the details (at least as I remember them) wrong.
Brown not only manages to get across an impressive amount in less than 200 pages, though, he gets it across vividly and (at least as I remember it) correctly. The descriptions of Road Sleep Experiences are so intense I may have had a flash or two of PTSD, and the allure of Hitting Hard is described vividly. Like the rest of the book, those sections work so well because they're About Music, but also NOT About Music. What artist hasn't suffered from trying too damn hard, especially when young?
Which means that I can recommend this to anyone, even if you are not in the small group of Writers Who Drum and Survived Atlantic Records.
Brown not only manages to get across an impressive amount in less than 200 pages, though, he gets it across vividly and (at least as I remember it) correctly. The descriptions of Road Sleep Experiences are so intense I may have had a flash or two of PTSD, and the allure of Hitting Hard is described vividly. Like the rest of the book, those sections work so well because they're About Music, but also NOT About Music. What artist hasn't suffered from trying too damn hard, especially when young?
Which means that I can recommend this to anyone, even if you are not in the small group of Writers Who Drum and Survived Atlantic Records.
September 21, 2023
Occasionally sharp and witty, also occasionally self-indulgent and safe. The author excels at writing about his shame. My favorite chapter was the Pete chapter, which was extraordinary as it describes the author's singular relationship with his first drum teacher and the shame it causes him as he veered from playing jazz to rock. We've all had relationships with adults like this. The only chapter that came close to matching the level of the Pete chapter was the reunion chapter, but it's a little too precious to measure up to Pete's chapter. Also what happened to Pete? Did Nic ever meet him as an adult?
March 2, 2023
As a current student in one of Nic's workshops, my review may be a little bit biased. This is the first memoir that I have read from beginning to end, and I was captivated the whole time. Knowing the author personally and my own history with drumming probably contributed to my investment, but neither of those things are necessary to find meaning within these chapters.
I actually felt inspired to write my own mini-memoir based on an aspect of my life that I currently feel strongly about. When a book provides instant inspiration like that, it deserves 5 stars!
I actually felt inspired to write my own mini-memoir based on an aspect of my life that I currently feel strongly about. When a book provides instant inspiration like that, it deserves 5 stars!
October 2, 2023
I really enjoyed this short memoir about the author's time in an "almost famous" rock band. He's a little younger than I am but I still found it very relatable being a musician myself (and a one time member of a "not nearly famous" rock band.)
March 26, 2025
Quite enjoyed, funny and emotional. Really enjoyed the emotional arc, did think it could use some action. Great use of imagery, really painted the situations with your words. You very much write like you talk, can’t wait to read more of your stories in class!
- Jackson
- Jackson
April 22, 2023
Nic's ambivalence to his growing career really resonates. He decides to change course amid success and spends 20 years realizing a new course and finally allowing both sides of himself to coexist.
February 18, 2024
started this sometime last year and it was great but im only really getting into reading rn but this was fantastic and really cool
i think one of my professors will enjoy chapter 13
i think one of my professors will enjoy chapter 13
October 24, 2023
What happens when you achieve your dream of being a rock star and realize it’s not what you want? The band you started in the eighth grade has signed a record deal with a major label before your 21st birthday, you’ve recorded an album and are touring all over the country, and you find that you don’t even like the music that much anymore.
Nic Brown chronicles his transformation from a drummer into a writer, a husband, a father, a teacher, and eventually, a drummer again. Bang Bang Crash is thoughtful, funny, and suffused with both melancholy and joy.
Nic Brown chronicles his transformation from a drummer into a writer, a husband, a father, a teacher, and eventually, a drummer again. Bang Bang Crash is thoughtful, funny, and suffused with both melancholy and joy.
August 19, 2025
Excellent memoir. Well written. I love this authors style. Check out his novels.
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