Let’s start this off with my usual upfront James Patterson disclosure. I read most of his books and have for several years. Some might ask why and that’s another whole discussion best saved for another day. I have really enjoyed some, liked some, and didn’t really care for others.
In this outing Patterson has teamed up for a second time with Mike Lupica, a veteran sports writer, novelist, and current caretaker of Robert B. Parker’s classic series Jesse Stone, Spenser (taking over from Ace Atkins), and Sunny Randall (handing off to Alison Gaylin).
“The House of Wolves” is the story of the dangerously disjointed, rich, and powerful Wolf family. The father Joe was the patriarchal owner of the San Francisco Wolves NFL franchise and the San Francisco Tribune newspaper. That is until he was found drowned in the bay, somehow falling overboard off his boat. Or did he? It is very apparent from page 5 that he was murdered.
The result hits his fighting selfish children, 3 sons – Danny, Joe, and Thomas; and 1 daughter – Jenny, with a shocking surprise. Jenny, who is the family outcast, has been put in charge of both the football team and the newspaper with her brothers reporting to her.
As with any Patterson novel, the family conflict and drama are unbelievably high as Jenny tries to save her team from a forced takeover, fight off her brothers attempts to undermine her and find her father’s killer. Oh, and did I mention that she is also coaching a high school football team? Nothing is beyond her abilities in this one.
I hope you notice my subtle attempts at sarcasm because there is more to come. This novel is being promoted as “The most suspenseful family saga since Succession or Yellowstone” but it is more like Dynasty in that is unashamedly over the top and any other cliché you want to use. Cliched. Ridiculously silly and excessive. Overblown and lavishly overdone. Too much. You fill in the blank…
The bad news is that there are so many plotlines running over the top of each other, so many cliched characters that are paper thin on any level of authenticity, and so many ridiculous twists and turns that come across as so melodramatic that you feel like you’re reading a science fiction or fantasy novel rather than a thriller. Every character is so unlikeable (except for Jenny and Cantor) and just downright evil in all of their behaviors. There is just no sense of any realism in any way. It’s like pretending the television show “The Office” is based on actual real-life events or that the movie “Blazing Saddles” is a realistic western that actually took place.
This is by far, the most extremely over-the-top novel by Patterson that I have ever read. It was like watching a Saturday Night Live skit on the behavior of sexist, old school NFL owners or watching the famous Dynasty Moldavian wedding murder massacre all over again. Talking about jumping the shark… That alone would make me give this one a two-star rating, mostly out of kindness.
But this review is going to get even more twisted. I cannot believe that I am going to say this, but at the same time, this novel was also the best definition of a “guilty please read” (yes really!). It was saturated with so many characters, twists and turns, and interesting behind the scenes of NFL ownership politics, that I couldn’t put the book down. It was like driving by a really bad car wreck. You find yourself slowing down and taking a look out of curiosity, but then you can’t turn away. You find yourself mesmerized by something you know that you don’t really want to be looking at, but it pulls you in and keeps your attention, no matter how absurdly stupid it is to be wasting time on it.
Somehow Patterson and Lupica did just that. The premise if the book and storylines had potential for an interesting reading experience, but they chose to take the “Friday the 13th / Freddy Kreuger“ absurdity over reality approach to storytelling. And the worst part is that, as bad as I make this sound, I still enjoyed reading it on a level that I cannot explain. It’s almost embarrassing to admit it, but the truth is that a part of me enjoyed this trashy, trashy read. Even though I expected more, it wasn’t a waste of my time.
I apologize for this schizophrenic review. I am sure at this point you are thinking, come on dude, make up your mind. Did you like this book or not? Great question. The truth is that it comes down to this. Was it realistic? No way. But do we read Patterson for that reason? No way. We read him for high level thrillers that help us escape our daily grind and enjoy an exciting thriller that makes us forget about all else. Even if the book is completely unrealistic and full of superficial characters that drive you crazy, he finds a way to keep you reading. This time Patterson, along with Lupica delivered the biggest guilty pleasure that I have read, knowing it was as bad as watching the Fonz jump the shark on “Happy Days” when I was a teenager. Literally.
It deserves 2.5 stars, but since Goodreads doesn’t let us round off our reviews, I will round it up to 3-stars because I am in a giving mood. If you ask me tomorrow, I may round it down instead…