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Pounded In The Butt By My Handsome Sentient Library Card Who Seems Otherworldly But In Reality Is Just A Natural Part Of The Priceless Resources Our Library System Provides
Mark is have a rough time in his new apartment. The place is small and it’s impossible to focus when his neighbor won’t stop making, and subsequently popping, balloon animals. Things are looking bleak, but when it appears there might be a solution to Mark’s problems in the form of a magical artifact, he jumps at the chance to find it.
Now Mark is on the hunt for a magical object known as the Lie Brarikard, the man’s hunt leading him to a nearby public library. It’s only here that Mark realizes his quest isn’t quite as magical as he initially thought… or is it?
With the help of a handsome sentient library card named Yorko, Mark is about to discover the true power of the library… with a hardcore gay pounding!
This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on gay sentient library card action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and archived knowledge love.
Now Mark is on the hunt for a magical object known as the Lie Brarikard, the man’s hunt leading him to a nearby public library. It’s only here that Mark realizes his quest isn’t quite as magical as he initially thought… or is it?
With the help of a handsome sentient library card named Yorko, Mark is about to discover the true power of the library… with a hardcore gay pounding!
This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on gay sentient library card action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and archived knowledge love.
48 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 6, 2022
About the author
Chuck Tingle
521 books5,515 followersChuck Tingle is a mysterious force of energy behind sunglasses and a pink mask. He is also an anonymous author of romance, horror, and fantasy. Chuck was born in Home of Truth, Utah, and now splits time between Billings, Montana and Los Angeles, California. Chuck writes to prove love is real, because love is the most important tool we have when resisting the endless cosmic void. Not everything people say about Chuck is true, but the important parts are.
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
August 29, 2023
The things I do for Booktok.
But also, forgot to take my antidepressant last night & this just gave me the biggest serotonin boost. I am laughing my damn ass off.
But also, forgot to take my antidepressant last night & this just gave me the biggest serotonin boost. I am laughing my damn ass off.
January 5, 2023
Was this a book? Yes
Was it relatively entertaining? I suppose
Will I pray that no one ever finds this on my Goodreads account? Yes
Was it relatively entertaining? I suppose
Will I pray that no one ever finds this on my Goodreads account? Yes
Read
April 26, 2026the things I do for Erica.
August 9, 2023
A literary work of genius. My favorite part was the library card’s abs.
June 14, 2026
""Library cards are pretty great," my lover replies with a confident, playful wink."
Read
May 11, 2024Listen, sometimes you tell your friends you’ve always wanted to read a Chuck Tingle book, and then one of them begs you to read this specific one. And that’s the story of how you read a book about a library card pounding a guy.
As this book does acknowledge, libraries rule.
Also, if you needed to know, there’s a line in here that says, “We’re unwilling cogs in a brutal capitalist machine that’s slowly grinding everyone into dust.” Chuck is a hero, folks.
Also also, the library card has abs.
That is (almost) all.
If you know me in real life, yes you do, and I am just this unhinged to read this. You’re welcome.
As this book does acknowledge, libraries rule.
Also, if you needed to know, there’s a line in here that says, “We’re unwilling cogs in a brutal capitalist machine that’s slowly grinding everyone into dust.” Chuck is a hero, folks.
Also also, the library card has abs.
That is (almost) all.
If you know me in real life, yes you do, and I am just this unhinged to read this. You’re welcome.
Read
August 29, 2023Well…… I’m not sure when the library got so absolutely filthy. I need a library card, stat.
April 6, 2023
What on EARTH do you rate this? How do you review it??? It’s just an EXPERIENCE.
Just here to say this has some cackle worthy quotes. I love anyone making use of ALL library resources 😉
For real though the main story made me think Chuck Tingle doesn’t know how to write (reminiscent of extremely amateur fanfic writing), but then the second story proved Tingle knows how to string together enjoyable or at least decent sentences. I saw some hope before it devolved into raw chaos again 😂
Just here to say this has some cackle worthy quotes. I love anyone making use of ALL library resources 😉
For real though the main story made me think Chuck Tingle doesn’t know how to write (reminiscent of extremely amateur fanfic writing), but then the second story proved Tingle knows how to string together enjoyable or at least decent sentences. I saw some hope before it devolved into raw chaos again 😂
January 14, 2023
This was certainly creative... that’s all I have to say
February 14, 2025
The story is a 3/5, but that goddamn goofy blue face on the fucking library card makes it a 4/5
Read
January 24, 2025These library services go above and beyond
January 26, 2025
Library cards truly are such an important part of our society😔 libraries are such a brilliant way for us to all come together❤️
November 23, 2022
Nothing sexier than a robust social institution
A romance that sounds too good to be true, but actually is just somewhere around you; just like the system of libraries. Let's hope for a future where every public service and infrastructure gets socialized and becomes as sexy as this sentient library card (maybe in future we get a Pounded In The Butt By the Phsical Manifestation of Universal Healthcare- I know its not the best title I am not Mr Tingle okay!!)
The gift at the end of the story was great, I love the extention of Tinglecorp Multiverse, and the meta commentary on the original tale this surprise story takes inspiration from. Not naming it to not spoil the surprise.
A romance that sounds too good to be true, but actually is just somewhere around you; just like the system of libraries. Let's hope for a future where every public service and infrastructure gets socialized and becomes as sexy as this sentient library card (maybe in future we get a Pounded In The Butt By the Phsical Manifestation of Universal Healthcare- I know its not the best title I am not Mr Tingle okay!!)
The gift at the end of the story was great, I love the extention of Tinglecorp Multiverse, and the meta commentary on the original tale this surprise story takes inspiration from. Not naming it to not spoil the surprise.
Read
April 2, 2023Yeah I spent money on this. What of it???
Read
December 4, 2022I really don’t know what to say about this one, either.
Certainly entertaining for what it is.
Certainly entertaining for what it is.
July 23, 2024
I don't really have words tbh.
April 16, 2026
library cards are so important!! support your local library :)
June 20, 2023
1.5 stars. This was kind of a joke book club pick, but I'll admit to being disappointed (I think I thought it was less of a joke than it ended up being??). There were typos/errors that editing should have caught, and I can tell the author subscribes to (or pretends to) the school of thought that writers cannot use the word "said" -- I vehemently disagree. This book included a second bonus/gift story that really let me see how much of this appears to be copy/pasted from the author's other works, which I was pretty disappointed in as well. All in all, it was even more of a joke than I had anticipated, and I didn't think it was very funny or very good. It was at least short.
March 3, 2025
I love the library
December 28, 2022
Well. That was definitely...unique. I did love how the beginning was telling how awesome libraries and library cards are. The rest was very.whst it was. And smutty.
Read
February 17, 2024Hey man I like my library card too but not that much.
March 27, 2026
This is rated on a fairness scale 😂 My first sentient object smut. This one really addressed some serious issues.
June 19, 2026
A beautiful story of finding love and finding community under the oppressive boots of capitalism.
July 30, 2025
I… cannot believe I read this.
best $3 ever
best $3 ever
August 4, 2023
"Belligerent lust" and "belligerent gaze" are definitely words only a man would use to describe arousal.
Also, the praise of library resources gives me strong public library vibes.
Also, the praise of library resources gives me strong public library vibes.
November 9, 2023
The woman scoots a page across the desk between us. “Just fill this out.”
I stare down at her paper, immediately confused. The questionnaire is simple enough, but the title gives me pause. “This is for a library card,” I counter. “I’m looking for a Lie Brarikard.” The words catch in my throat right as I reach the end of my sentence, a stark realization erupting through my veins with an icy chill. “Oh no,” I stammer.
“You don’t want a library card?” the woman questions.
I consider this a moment, struggling to pull myself together. “No… I mean… sure,” I stammer, shaking my head. “I’m sorry. A friend told me this could solve a few problems of mine, like it was some kind of magical key. I guess he was just messing with me."
“Well, a library card certainly won’t solve all your problems, but it can solve a few,” the woman behind the counter offers. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t have any peace and quiet at home,” I retort.
“It’s quiet here,” she assures me.
“I’m running out of room for my books,” I continue.
“You bring your library books back when you’re done,” she explains. “No clutter.”
“Well, what about the internet?” I scoff.
The librarian smiles. “We have that, too.”
I’m still skeptical that something as easy, and free, as a library card could actually help me with all these things, but at this point I’ve got nothing left to lose. I’ve trekked all the way here, so I might as well fill out this form.
[...]
“Maybe there’s a little more to see,” I finally coo, shocking even myself. Yorko’s expression flickers slightly, but he doesn’t respond. “I mean, if you’re allowed to show me something else, I’d love to see it,” I continue. “I’m curious what else comes with my library card.”
“On the clock? that’s everything,” Yorko finally replies. “But… what I do after hours is my business.”
“When you do get off?” I question.
The sentient card smirks. “Right now.”
With that, the plastic rectangle turns and begins leading me deeper into the stacks. We’re already in a distinctly unpopulated part of the library, but soon enough we push through a door to reveal an area that appears as though it’s been empty for years. I gasp as I witness the glorious chamber before me, torches hanging on the wall and casting their flickering golden light across the ceiling above. This room is made entire of ancient sandstone, some long forgotten temple of magic and mystery.
“Wait, what,” I blurt. “I thought there was no mystical labyrinth hidden within the library.”
“I never said that,” Yorko retorts.
[...]
Not one to rush out the late fees and fines, Yorko takes a similar approach with my asshole.
[...]
“I’ve got a lot on my plate, and I know a library card isn’t going to solve the crushing weight of a greed-fueled system based on soul-shredding capitalism run wild,” I finally offer. “I mean… not even close.” Yorko nods. “But a library card is going to give me a few very important things, and that’s a start,” I continue. “Life’s not easy, and humanity has made some pretty dumb decisions over the years, but I’m happy to be here in the presence of one thing that we actually kinda got right.”
I stare down at her paper, immediately confused. The questionnaire is simple enough, but the title gives me pause. “This is for a library card,” I counter. “I’m looking for a Lie Brarikard.” The words catch in my throat right as I reach the end of my sentence, a stark realization erupting through my veins with an icy chill. “Oh no,” I stammer.
“You don’t want a library card?” the woman questions.
I consider this a moment, struggling to pull myself together. “No… I mean… sure,” I stammer, shaking my head. “I’m sorry. A friend told me this could solve a few problems of mine, like it was some kind of magical key. I guess he was just messing with me."
“Well, a library card certainly won’t solve all your problems, but it can solve a few,” the woman behind the counter offers. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t have any peace and quiet at home,” I retort.
“It’s quiet here,” she assures me.
“I’m running out of room for my books,” I continue.
“You bring your library books back when you’re done,” she explains. “No clutter.”
“Well, what about the internet?” I scoff.
The librarian smiles. “We have that, too.”
I’m still skeptical that something as easy, and free, as a library card could actually help me with all these things, but at this point I’ve got nothing left to lose. I’ve trekked all the way here, so I might as well fill out this form.
[...]
“Maybe there’s a little more to see,” I finally coo, shocking even myself. Yorko’s expression flickers slightly, but he doesn’t respond. “I mean, if you’re allowed to show me something else, I’d love to see it,” I continue. “I’m curious what else comes with my library card.”
“On the clock? that’s everything,” Yorko finally replies. “But… what I do after hours is my business.”
“When you do get off?” I question.
The sentient card smirks. “Right now.”
With that, the plastic rectangle turns and begins leading me deeper into the stacks. We’re already in a distinctly unpopulated part of the library, but soon enough we push through a door to reveal an area that appears as though it’s been empty for years. I gasp as I witness the glorious chamber before me, torches hanging on the wall and casting their flickering golden light across the ceiling above. This room is made entire of ancient sandstone, some long forgotten temple of magic and mystery.
“Wait, what,” I blurt. “I thought there was no mystical labyrinth hidden within the library.”
“I never said that,” Yorko retorts.
[...]
Not one to rush out the late fees and fines, Yorko takes a similar approach with my asshole.
[...]
“I’ve got a lot on my plate, and I know a library card isn’t going to solve the crushing weight of a greed-fueled system based on soul-shredding capitalism run wild,” I finally offer. “I mean… not even close.” Yorko nods. “But a library card is going to give me a few very important things, and that’s a start,” I continue. “Life’s not easy, and humanity has made some pretty dumb decisions over the years, but I’m happy to be here in the presence of one thing that we actually kinda got right.”
May 28, 2026
Only Chuck Tingle could write a bizarrely explicit erotic novella about a sentient library card and somehow turn it into a genuine love letter to public libraries and the services they provide.
Yes, the premise is absolutely ridiculous. The “Lie Brarikard” quest is eye-roll inducing, and the moment Mark arrives at the public library the story fully embraces its absurdity. Yet beneath all the chaos, Tingle manages to sneak in something sincere: a reminder that libraries really do offer life-changing resources to people who know how to use them. Mark’s practical problems could be solved through library services, even if his more… intimate needs are handled by Yorko, the sentient library card with perhaps a name as gloriously unhinged as the plot of this book.
One detail that especially amused me was the mention of sending Mark’s senses into “overdrive,” which I immediately chose to interpret as a knowing wink toward the library ebook platform. Whether intentional or not, it felt like the kind of inside joke that library workers and even some patrons would appreciate.
As always with Tingle, the humor comes from his commitment to the absurd premise. The novella understands exactly how ridiculous it is while simultaneously being earnest about the importance of public libraries as community resources.
Objectively, this is probably more of a three-star read, but Chuck Tingle’s unrestrained imagination, combined with the novella’s strange affection for libraries, won me over enough to bump it up another star. A silly and unexpectedly affectionate ode to public libraries.
Yes, the premise is absolutely ridiculous. The “Lie Brarikard” quest is eye-roll inducing, and the moment Mark arrives at the public library the story fully embraces its absurdity. Yet beneath all the chaos, Tingle manages to sneak in something sincere: a reminder that libraries really do offer life-changing resources to people who know how to use them. Mark’s practical problems could be solved through library services, even if his more… intimate needs are handled by Yorko, the sentient library card with perhaps a name as gloriously unhinged as the plot of this book.
One detail that especially amused me was the mention of sending Mark’s senses into “overdrive,” which I immediately chose to interpret as a knowing wink toward the library ebook platform. Whether intentional or not, it felt like the kind of inside joke that library workers and even some patrons would appreciate.
As always with Tingle, the humor comes from his commitment to the absurd premise. The novella understands exactly how ridiculous it is while simultaneously being earnest about the importance of public libraries as community resources.
Objectively, this is probably more of a three-star read, but Chuck Tingle’s unrestrained imagination, combined with the novella’s strange affection for libraries, won me over enough to bump it up another star. A silly and unexpectedly affectionate ode to public libraries.
December 12, 2024
Wasn't this book... eye opening.
I'm currently doing a sort of series on reading a bunch of sentient being books, as they're... intruiging to say the least and always provide me with a good laugh (which is desperately needed at the end of a long working day).
This one, certainly provided some laughs. It was... utterly bizarre, which to be fair was entirely expected from the title.
It is what it says on the tin, it's about a man who meets a sentient library card... and has some intimate relations with said library card.
It's a very short book, which absolutely is taken into consideration but there were parts where I was left really quite confused. For example Yorko was floating, then suddenly had legs... and it just baffled me.
Chuck Tingle also included a 'bonus book' at the end which was fantastic in the sense of you get two books for the price of one... but that one left me even more confused than I was already.
Honestly... I'm still not quite sure what I just read and although it was hilarious and did the job of amusing me, the last 'sentient being' book I read was written so surprisingly, incredibly well (despite also being very short too), sadly this one fell a little short.
If you're looking for a short, easy... bizarre read about a man who REALLY loves library cards... go for it. If you're not looking to be so confused, stay away.
I'm currently doing a sort of series on reading a bunch of sentient being books, as they're... intruiging to say the least and always provide me with a good laugh (which is desperately needed at the end of a long working day).
This one, certainly provided some laughs. It was... utterly bizarre, which to be fair was entirely expected from the title.
It is what it says on the tin, it's about a man who meets a sentient library card... and has some intimate relations with said library card.
It's a very short book, which absolutely is taken into consideration but there were parts where I was left really quite confused. For example Yorko was floating, then suddenly had legs... and it just baffled me.
Chuck Tingle also included a 'bonus book' at the end which was fantastic in the sense of you get two books for the price of one... but that one left me even more confused than I was already.
Honestly... I'm still not quite sure what I just read and although it was hilarious and did the job of amusing me, the last 'sentient being' book I read was written so surprisingly, incredibly well (despite also being very short too), sadly this one fell a little short.
If you're looking for a short, easy... bizarre read about a man who REALLY loves library cards... go for it. If you're not looking to be so confused, stay away.
January 5, 2023
Listen...I took one for the library team and read this as a bit of a dare. I appreciate that the beginning of the story is how important libraries are and what benefits they offer.
After that is exactly what you would expect from Chuck Tingle (even though this was my first ((and only)) Chuck Tingle book). He certainly is inventive!
After that is exactly what you would expect from Chuck Tingle (even though this was my first ((and only)) Chuck Tingle book). He certainly is inventive!
August 10, 2022
So far, this one is my favorite one. Guy moves to a new town, his friend recommends a magical place called a library, guy meets and bangs a sentient library card.
Literally laughed out loud at parts, and, as per usual, the porn is top tier.
Ten out of ten.
Literally laughed out loud at parts, and, as per usual, the porn is top tier.
Ten out of ten.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews