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Very Intentional Parenting: Awakening the Empowered Parent Within
A different kind of parenting book that helps parents improve themselves first, so they can then be better parents to their kids.
It's time for a fresh approach to parenting!
Isn't it time for a parenting book that is practical and relatable? Destini Ann Davis is a working mom and parenting coach who read dozens of parenting books and made all the typical parenting mistakes before realizing that in order to have a peaceful, positive relationship with her children, she first needed to have a peaceful, positive relationship with herself. Very Intentional Parenting features a fresh, down-to-earth approach to parenting from someone you can relate to. Through real-life examples from her experiences as a mom and parenting coach, she gives readers actionable strategies for tackling many of today’s most challenging parenting scenarios using positive discipline techniques, effective communication, and emotional intelligence. She'll encourage you, coach you, and help you become the parent you’ve always desired to be. If you're a parent looking for more connection and collaboration in your relationship with your child, you've come to the right place.
Here's what you'll find
A fresh, energetic take on parenting in today's world Practical tips for creating open and constructive dialogue with your kidsParent-focused insights to empower you to heal, so you can then avoid fear- and trauma-based parenting strategiesActionable steps to increase respect in your home, while still preserving the parent-child relationship
It's time for a fresh approach to parenting!
Isn't it time for a parenting book that is practical and relatable? Destini Ann Davis is a working mom and parenting coach who read dozens of parenting books and made all the typical parenting mistakes before realizing that in order to have a peaceful, positive relationship with her children, she first needed to have a peaceful, positive relationship with herself. Very Intentional Parenting features a fresh, down-to-earth approach to parenting from someone you can relate to. Through real-life examples from her experiences as a mom and parenting coach, she gives readers actionable strategies for tackling many of today’s most challenging parenting scenarios using positive discipline techniques, effective communication, and emotional intelligence. She'll encourage you, coach you, and help you become the parent you’ve always desired to be. If you're a parent looking for more connection and collaboration in your relationship with your child, you've come to the right place.
Here's what you'll find
A fresh, energetic take on parenting in today's world Practical tips for creating open and constructive dialogue with your kidsParent-focused insights to empower you to heal, so you can then avoid fear- and trauma-based parenting strategiesActionable steps to increase respect in your home, while still preserving the parent-child relationship
282 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 30, 2022
139 people are currently reading
839 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
May 31, 2023
I’m a huge fan of this book. I listened to the audio book read by the author which made it even better. Where many parenting books I love put primary focus on neural development of the child and empathizing with the child to affect change in how you show up for your child, this book spends the majority of the focus on you as the parent and what you can control as the parent (your self, your boundaries, your family culture, etc). It felt so empowering to know this information is all immediately actionable things I can grow in myself to encourage my familial values and goals within my household. I loved how non-judgmental this book is and how very inclusive it is of all households including the single parent homes.
November 7, 2024
A book every parent should read ♥️
August 5, 2025
Learned so much from this book!
September 21, 2023
I found this book to be super insightful and helped even my inner child. Will definitely be re-reading!
September 19, 2022
I enjoyed reading this book. This is a new author for me which I look forward to reading more from in the future. This is a well written story that inspire any parent and give them inspiration. This is a great book that would help any parent to put themselves first. Not all books are written so that it is easy to understand and to clearly put yourself first. This book does just that. It provides great tips on parenting as well as how it is important that you put yourself first. i would recommend this book to other parents whether they are struggling or not as a parent. For me being a parent of a special needs child it shows me ways that I can improve on myself as a parent. There is alot of information in this book but the author did a great job of not getting the reader confused. This book would be helpful to any and all. I highly recommend this book. You don't want to miss the tips to be a better you.
December 23, 2022
If you are a parent or will be a parent, READ THIS BOOK. It's that simple.
Mirrors closely my own journey with CBT to control anxiety. Actionable, kind, with space to think and grow. Seriously. Read it.
Mirrors closely my own journey with CBT to control anxiety. Actionable, kind, with space to think and grow. Seriously. Read it.
December 18, 2022
Parenting has its challenges throughout all stages of child development. Author Destini Ann Davis has some practical advice and strategies for caretakers, whether parents or grandparents.
She appropriately begins by asking the reader to think about herself/ himself as far as: what parenting means to each, experiences with parenting now and as a child, values each holds dear, and ideas such as what each needs to thrive and survive emotionally and mentally.
By about the middle of the book, the author begins with strategies for working with one’s children. She talks about connection, which is the foundation for her parenting style. She gives examples from her own life of ways to better connect with your child. She talks of connection through play, compassion, and just special time with each child. She talks about approaching your child’s world with curiosity. Instead of immediately reacting to words which are said, ask questions to better understand. She discusses collaboration, defining roles and working together with children. She has a list of questions parents might use as they seek to establish what is important to each. Core values are established. The author is realistic in that all of this is approached a little differently depending on the age of the child. She emphasizes that a parent has the role of the Chief Safety Officer and that safety will not be compromised. The parent is also the Chief Guidance officer and gives examples of better ways to guide without being authoritarian.
The later part of the book talks about communication strategies such as active listening, and gives the parent some tools to use such as redirecting, creating routines & rituals, making repairs when you “ mess up”, learning to empathize, etc.
In general I felt this book had lots of good practical advice for parents with examples to aid in understanding. It was important to begin by focusing on the parent, but I felt this part could have been shortened. Just my feelings.
I thank Bookishfirst and Penguin Random for my copy of Ms. Davis’s very worthwhile book on parenting.
She appropriately begins by asking the reader to think about herself/ himself as far as: what parenting means to each, experiences with parenting now and as a child, values each holds dear, and ideas such as what each needs to thrive and survive emotionally and mentally.
By about the middle of the book, the author begins with strategies for working with one’s children. She talks about connection, which is the foundation for her parenting style. She gives examples from her own life of ways to better connect with your child. She talks of connection through play, compassion, and just special time with each child. She talks about approaching your child’s world with curiosity. Instead of immediately reacting to words which are said, ask questions to better understand. She discusses collaboration, defining roles and working together with children. She has a list of questions parents might use as they seek to establish what is important to each. Core values are established. The author is realistic in that all of this is approached a little differently depending on the age of the child. She emphasizes that a parent has the role of the Chief Safety Officer and that safety will not be compromised. The parent is also the Chief Guidance officer and gives examples of better ways to guide without being authoritarian.
The later part of the book talks about communication strategies such as active listening, and gives the parent some tools to use such as redirecting, creating routines & rituals, making repairs when you “ mess up”, learning to empathize, etc.
In general I felt this book had lots of good practical advice for parents with examples to aid in understanding. It was important to begin by focusing on the parent, but I felt this part could have been shortened. Just my feelings.
I thank Bookishfirst and Penguin Random for my copy of Ms. Davis’s very worthwhile book on parenting.
November 16, 2022
Very Intentional Parenting is just that...a book celebrating and encouraging and promoting intentional parenting. A bit much of what I am used to, but I always appreciate a new parenting book, not just for my own personal gain at knowledge but for help with others, so that I can pass this type of book along to someone I feel might benefit from it.
What I read was a book that supported and encouraged parents to be a bit stronger...confident...or that's how I see it. Author Destini Ann Davis has blogger experience. Bloggers are intentional in their words and thoughts. I can appreciate that. It was enlightening and supportive and interesting. Her words, her thoughts, her advice are not just centered on the parenting aspect but on making us parents better humans/ better people so that we can have better experiences in parenting but also, so our little ones see and not just hear. it's a useful encouragement on mindfulness and strength. I found it to be a light read. Easy flowing. I was able to grasp and comprehend her skills and advice. I don't know if it gave me more than that. I can see it being encouraging for a new parent or for a parent that needs a little more guidance in confidence so that their child can stand to model that same confidence within themselves.
A good read. Not overly complicated. You can't go wrong reading an inspiring book from someone that just wants to help.
What I read was a book that supported and encouraged parents to be a bit stronger...confident...or that's how I see it. Author Destini Ann Davis has blogger experience. Bloggers are intentional in their words and thoughts. I can appreciate that. It was enlightening and supportive and interesting. Her words, her thoughts, her advice are not just centered on the parenting aspect but on making us parents better humans/ better people so that we can have better experiences in parenting but also, so our little ones see and not just hear. it's a useful encouragement on mindfulness and strength. I found it to be a light read. Easy flowing. I was able to grasp and comprehend her skills and advice. I don't know if it gave me more than that. I can see it being encouraging for a new parent or for a parent that needs a little more guidance in confidence so that their child can stand to model that same confidence within themselves.
A good read. Not overly complicated. You can't go wrong reading an inspiring book from someone that just wants to help.
March 27, 2024
I've read many a parenting book. This is the one that I will keep and tell other parents to read and use over and over again. It is healing for me and ultimately I hope will change my behavior to have a better relationship with my kids. Mine are currently younger but I don't want to bring shaming, judgmental, or age inappropriate expectations to my parenting, so hoping as they get older I can have a less strenuous relationship with them compared to what I experienced growing up. Destini writes for any parent, and I do mean ANY parent that is currently in it; If you have several generations in your household, if you're a younger or older parent, if you are single or co-parenting, you can apply these methods.
The exercises at the beginning of the book were grounding and something I return to not just in parenting but in other parts of my life. I want the values I have for my family to also reflect in my work, in our school relationships, with our neighbors, etc. The other exercises like a mission statement I'm waiting until mine are older but also thought of course this is just a continuation of values! The piece on repair work...I have to buy this book and will ear mark and note up those pages for sure. I loved this guide. Can't say enough about how helpful it is to have some concrete plans going forward for the next 18 years and beyond.
The exercises at the beginning of the book were grounding and something I return to not just in parenting but in other parts of my life. I want the values I have for my family to also reflect in my work, in our school relationships, with our neighbors, etc. The other exercises like a mission statement I'm waiting until mine are older but also thought of course this is just a continuation of values! The piece on repair work...I have to buy this book and will ear mark and note up those pages for sure. I loved this guide. Can't say enough about how helpful it is to have some concrete plans going forward for the next 18 years and beyond.
December 20, 2022
Thank you BookishFirst and Penguin Random House Publishing for an ARC of "Very Intentional Parenting" by Destini Ann Davis.
As a parent, grandparent and school teacher, I found the synopsis provided by Bookishfirst to be well thought out. I looked forward to reading this book, and using the methods suggested by Ms. Destini Ann Davis in both my personal life and classroom.
I was intrigued that she has the reader focus on what their needs are as a parent. I loved the "ask yourself" questions, list of "values" , and "setting your intentions" (after determining your 15 core values). All valuable information given in the excerpt alone! I also liked the direction this book was taking, based on the "Contents" listed.
Update: Reading "Very Intentional Parenting" in its entirety did not disappoint! Ms. Davis does a phenomenal job of organizing the steps necessary to improve parenting skills. Some of the topics, just to name a few: setting your intentions, creating safety, setting boundaries, understanding your triggers, and having empowering conversations.
In my opinion, this is one of the best parenting books to come out in years.
If you have purchased this book, or intend to, I would strongly recommend following Ms. Davis on her TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram channels.
As a parent, grandparent and school teacher, I found the synopsis provided by Bookishfirst to be well thought out. I looked forward to reading this book, and using the methods suggested by Ms. Destini Ann Davis in both my personal life and classroom.
I was intrigued that she has the reader focus on what their needs are as a parent. I loved the "ask yourself" questions, list of "values" , and "setting your intentions" (after determining your 15 core values). All valuable information given in the excerpt alone! I also liked the direction this book was taking, based on the "Contents" listed.
Update: Reading "Very Intentional Parenting" in its entirety did not disappoint! Ms. Davis does a phenomenal job of organizing the steps necessary to improve parenting skills. Some of the topics, just to name a few: setting your intentions, creating safety, setting boundaries, understanding your triggers, and having empowering conversations.
In my opinion, this is one of the best parenting books to come out in years.
If you have purchased this book, or intend to, I would strongly recommend following Ms. Davis on her TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram channels.
abandoned
September 20, 2022Very Intentional Parenting: Awakening The Empowered Parent Within by Destini Ann Davis
6h 36m read by Destini Ann Davis, 272 pages Kindle
original working title B*tch You Doin' a Good Job!: A Positive Parenting Book
Genre: Nonfiction, Parenting
Rating as a movie: R for language
My rating: DNF @ 4% 14:51, 4 minutes into Chapter 1.
Why I quit: This book is baby food and I need steak to feel stimulated. I don't might reading beginner parenting books if they are written well but this author repeated herself multiple times within the first 15 minutes and it was anything substantial, "you're the type of parent that reads parenting books" so, you don't need to keep saying that. When you have an introduction it usually comes with an outline for the book, this did not and chapter one was just a repeat. It felt like I was having a conversation with a nervous friend. I lost interest.
Recommend to others?: Maybe. If you're starting from zero or have hit rock bottom this could be helpful, I'm not sure, there are better books out there on the topic.
6h 36m read by Destini Ann Davis, 272 pages Kindle
original working title B*tch You Doin' a Good Job!: A Positive Parenting Book
Genre: Nonfiction, Parenting
Rating as a movie: R for language
My rating: DNF @ 4% 14:51, 4 minutes into Chapter 1.
Why I quit: This book is baby food and I need steak to feel stimulated. I don't might reading beginner parenting books if they are written well but this author repeated herself multiple times within the first 15 minutes and it was anything substantial, "you're the type of parent that reads parenting books" so, you don't need to keep saying that. When you have an introduction it usually comes with an outline for the book, this did not and chapter one was just a repeat. It felt like I was having a conversation with a nervous friend. I lost interest.
Recommend to others?: Maybe. If you're starting from zero or have hit rock bottom this could be helpful, I'm not sure, there are better books out there on the topic.
December 15, 2022
What a wonderful resource to have on hand while navigating this journey called Parenthood. I loved the honestly at the beginning of the book about being judged and just trying your hardest to be the best parent for your children. The book spoke such a volume on voice, I felt like the author was just having a conversation with me. Ms. Davis had clear and thought out chapters that were so helpful and constructive. She gave wonderful examples within the chapters and lots of reflecting questions to ponder. I loved that before she addressed on how to parent your child, she addresses how to reflect on your own baggage, expectations, and goals. Emphasizing how important it is to start with ourselves and making healthy choices for ourselves before trying to guide our children. I loved the section on sitting down and coming up with a mission and vision statement for your family. Starting clear goals for everyone to try and drive towards while also building trust and community within your own family. Such a great resource that I will be going back to again and again.
December 20, 2022
I'm always wary of books written by social media stars, no matter the subject. And for something as personal (and polarizing! Mummy-Internet is brutal!) as parenting, well, let's just say I will take any advice with a grain of salt.
So it was when I received a copy of Destini Ann Davis's Very Intentional Parenting.
But I found myself flying through her narrative. It's so down-to-earth and personable--it's as though you're talking to a close friend rather than a stranger. Davis's approach, which is to come at parenting from a place of compassion and understanding is evident throughout. Parenting is the toughest job there is (to have another's life in your hands is anxiety inducing!), and we're so hard on ourselves. Davis's text reminds us that there is plenty of room to forgive our mistakes and gives actionable advice to helping our children grow with firmness, but plenty of compassion.
Special thanks to BookishFirst and DK publishing for the free copy of this book in exchange for a review.
So it was when I received a copy of Destini Ann Davis's Very Intentional Parenting.
But I found myself flying through her narrative. It's so down-to-earth and personable--it's as though you're talking to a close friend rather than a stranger. Davis's approach, which is to come at parenting from a place of compassion and understanding is evident throughout. Parenting is the toughest job there is (to have another's life in your hands is anxiety inducing!), and we're so hard on ourselves. Davis's text reminds us that there is plenty of room to forgive our mistakes and gives actionable advice to helping our children grow with firmness, but plenty of compassion.
Special thanks to BookishFirst and DK publishing for the free copy of this book in exchange for a review.
January 21, 2023
5/5 Stars
I think this is a very good book to read as a new (or not so new!) parent. There is a lot of reflection to do to make sure you can have the best relationship with your child. And what made this connect with me was how the author showed us that even she isn't a perfect parent.
There are many layers to this novel and how it can help you raise your child. And this is a resource that can be used for a multitude of years as your parent grows and as you grow as a parent.
Throughout this book, there are many exercises that connected with me and helped me reflect on how my past has influenced my own parenting journey. I also enjoyed that the author mentioned other resources that she also used that could help her readers. Each section is short but informative.
Ultimately, this is a book that will stay on my shelf and be brought down when I need a reminder of how I want to parent.
Disclaimer: I received a review copy through BookishFirst.
I think this is a very good book to read as a new (or not so new!) parent. There is a lot of reflection to do to make sure you can have the best relationship with your child. And what made this connect with me was how the author showed us that even she isn't a perfect parent.
There are many layers to this novel and how it can help you raise your child. And this is a resource that can be used for a multitude of years as your parent grows and as you grow as a parent.
Throughout this book, there are many exercises that connected with me and helped me reflect on how my past has influenced my own parenting journey. I also enjoyed that the author mentioned other resources that she also used that could help her readers. Each section is short but informative.
Ultimately, this is a book that will stay on my shelf and be brought down when I need a reminder of how I want to parent.
Disclaimer: I received a review copy through BookishFirst.
January 17, 2023
Parenting is the hardest job for I've ever had! Everyday I’m faced with new challenges. I don’t typically read a lot of parenting books, but this one peaked my interest as soon as I read the cover. The author breaks the book down into very relatable and easy to understand chapters.
The chapter about triggers is especially informative. I learned about some different trigger warnings and how to deal with them. Whining can be very difficult for me sometimes. It also touches on feelings of guilt too.
Also the chapter covering the four Cs was very informative too. Connection, curiosity, collaboration, and communication. All four of these things are so important and Destini goes into great detail about each one.
Overall, I think this book is full of great information and anyone who takes care of children should read it. I plan to recommend it to all my mom friends.
The chapter about triggers is especially informative. I learned about some different trigger warnings and how to deal with them. Whining can be very difficult for me sometimes. It also touches on feelings of guilt too.
Also the chapter covering the four Cs was very informative too. Connection, curiosity, collaboration, and communication. All four of these things are so important and Destini goes into great detail about each one.
Overall, I think this book is full of great information and anyone who takes care of children should read it. I plan to recommend it to all my mom friends.
January 7, 2023
This reassuring work by TikTok star and parenting coach Destini Ann Davis lets parents know that there is no need to be perfect to be a great parent. She emphasizes that the importance of good parenting lies in simply being present in children’s lives, not perfect. Throughout this book the author will help parents find the magical inner parent that lies inside every parent. She begins by exploring the reader’s personal childhood experiences and how those have shaped the present-day reality of struggling to be the best parent possible. She provides practical guidance to empower parents as well as four core principles of intentional parenting, along with six intentional parenting tools to resolve conflict, and provide children with coping skill sets of their own.
November 27, 2023
Author Destine Ann Davis does a great job in this book to help you become the best parent possible during these challenging days. It’s important to take note that what makes a great parent is subjective due to a variety of circumstances. The value I found in this book comes from Destini sharing her own journey in parenting while also helping you uncover what being a great parent means for you. The book provides great research on each topic broken down into easy-to-read chapters. Each chapter concludes with a ton of reflective questions for you to answer solo, with a spouse, or an accountability partner to go deeper on each topic.
April 27, 2024
Love this perspective on parenting- really focusing on the adult taking care of themselves so we can show up as our best selves for our kids. The focus is a lot of self-work so that we can intentionally parent (instead of large focus on the kids and what they are doing.) That being said, it gives very specific examples of what things look like/sound like between parent and child (for example, specific examples of boundary setting statements, repair statements, etc.) Sometimes I feel like books say what not to do, but don’t have the specifics of what to do. This book has the examples of what to do! (Because as she says in the book, you can’t do a don’t!)
February 14, 2023
Loved and resonated with so many of the concepts Destini Ann discusses in her book Very Intentional Parenting. I don't enjoy when self-help/ parenting books seem to talk at you, and where they leave very little room for error. I feel disempowered as the reader. This book does the opposite, Destini Ann is honest about her trial and errors, which makes it easier for you to accept that you have some growing to do too.
This is also a refreshing read for anyone needing to be reminded of how important it is to be intentional with your parenting.
This is also a refreshing read for anyone needing to be reminded of how important it is to be intentional with your parenting.
April 3, 2024
Really great parenting book. This was mentioned in a review already, but the reason it sticks out to me in particular is because it is a book what YOU can do as a parent, setting your own boundaries, working on triggers, and showing up to be the best parent you know you are capable of being. It's both empowering and daunting, realizing that so much of parenting is done from within, and working through the things that tend to trigger you. This is a good one, and gives poignant advice on how to be intentional, just as the title states.
February 25, 2023
Her whole thing is intention which I love. She talks about connection, curiosity, communication, and collaboration. There are tons of journal prompts to help process and implement the ideas in the book. There is a big emphasis on regulating ourselves as parents. And the last chapter is all about repair and recognizing we aren’t going to get it “right” all the time. There is a little language. Overall great ideas coming from a place of empowerment and compassion.
July 9, 2025
I thoroughly enjoyed Very Intentional Parenting. The book offers practical, thoughtful tools that are easy to understand and apply in real-life parenting situations. I especially appreciated how it encourages a proactive and mindful approach, helping me feel more confident and connected in my parenting. I plan to implement many of the strategies and found the overall tone encouraging and empowering. Highly recommended for any parent looking to grow intentionally alongside their child.
March 10, 2025
My favorite parenting book
This book meets parents where they are at in a deep way. It is not a book that expects any level of income, support, or stability. It's a book that is kind to both parent and child.
This book meets parents where they are at in a deep way. It is not a book that expects any level of income, support, or stability. It's a book that is kind to both parent and child.
November 19, 2025
I follow Destiny on social media and really enjoy her parenting posts.The book, however, contained far more information than I expected it to, focusing on parenting myself first. I highly recommend this. Its contents are invaluable!
July 10, 2023
This book makes a parent accountable for their actions. It's also has awesome questions to make you think about your values and how to set realistic goals.
December 1, 2023
A wonderful walkthrough on parenting intentionally. Tons of example scenarios and lots of thought exercises.
Definitely recommend to any parent or anyone wanting to become a parent.
Definitely recommend to any parent or anyone wanting to become a parent.
September 10, 2025
Best parenting book I’ve read in a long time. The author is so genuine and authentic. She is realistic and doesn’t make you feel bad. Loved this!
February 8, 2023
Davis is one of the reasons I still have a TikTok account. Her short videos of intentional parenting wisdom are helping me use positive discipline with my daughter with clear boundaries and open communication. She empowers parents to identify their family values and use them to parent more effectively. She asks us to learn to recognize our parenting triggers and trauma responses and give grace to ourselves and our children.
August 30, 2022
This was not my usual read. This is a parenting book, and I’ve never read one of those because I don’t have kids. However this is a different parenting book than what you’d think of. This focuses on helping parents to first improve themselves, almost like a self help book. I really liked the idea of looking at it this way and think this will defiantly make better parents. The author is a working mom who also blogs! I’d seen her on tiktok which is what really made me want to give it a go. The book is broken up into three parts radical responsibility, the four c’s of intentional parenting, and the intentional parenting toolkit! My favorite was learning about the four C’s, connection, curiosity, collaboration, and communication. This book really taught me so much about parenting that I never even thought of before. I’m really glad that I read it.
August 17, 2022
This is they first time I have read a book written by a blogger! The author has been posting on Tik Tok, Youtube, and Instagram channels for 10 years! I don't like social media so I only go on Youtube to learn how to fix things, like my car or the computer. However, I realize I am an anomaly. Her best recommendation is to learn to love yourself first, before you can appropriately model the behaviour you want your children to copy. It's a great point and one that is taught in all the Early Childhood Programs in North America. She says that it is easy to doubt yourself, and "Kids learn how to cope with emotions through their experiences with their parents." This seems obvious, but since parenting doesn't come with a "how-to" book, you might want to read this one! In essence she is promoting "emotion regulation," in order to cope with life and become a well-adjusted adult.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews