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Feeling This Way
In the spirit of his debut, Intoxicated Heart, Ben Esqueda returns with a fresh, moving collection of poems. From the crushing pain of loss to the elation of new love to the struggle of forging your own path, the messages in this book are ubiquitous, but also distinctly personal to the reader.
Feeling This Way is a tender portrayal of growth and self actualization.
Feeling This Way is a tender portrayal of growth and self actualization.
163 pages, Paperback
Published June 3, 2022
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7449 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 54 reviews
March 24, 2023
Now, whilst I do feel this poet holds a substantial amount of potential with some of these poems holding a profound message, I do feel this poetry book left me with something to be desired. A lot of the poems felt repetitive and lacking any real meaning. This work didn’t feel cohesive, I found myself really resonating with a singular line, only for the rest of the poem to consist of what seemed like random words thrown together. As I mentioned previously, this was more frustrating than anything as I feel this poet has real considerable prospectives. With this being said, I really enjoyed 𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺. I found a lot of comfort in this particular collection of poems. If you’re going through heartbreak you will probably love this book, however as I am not maybe my perspective is harsh.
10/10 recommend for souls in pain, this prose will hurt so bad but feel so good.
10/10 recommend for souls in pain, this prose will hurt so bad but feel so good.
May 11, 2023
finished this while i was waiting for a task to complete. gay and sad.
Read
March 23, 2023love yourself
July 6, 2023
i'm gonna start by saying i think this book has some really great one-liners and a really strong, needed message. i have no doubt that the author is talented and his message is important. this being said, i simply didn't find myself resonating with the poetry. in a way, it felt very elementary with similes that fell short and untitled poems––i craved a depth and complexity that these poems never quite delivered. moreover, it kind of felt like i was reading someone's journal or their first draft of poems. of course, some people love this style, personally, i just don't vibe with it.
October 9, 2024
A lot of the poetry in this book felt very repetitive. This could be intentional as a way of describing the messy nature of breakups and moving on. However, the overall narrative did feel tired at times.
Regardless of the content, it’s always nice to read about another person’s lived queer experiences. Whether it’s a first kiss or heartbreak, there is always something I can relate to.
Regardless of the content, it’s always nice to read about another person’s lived queer experiences. Whether it’s a first kiss or heartbreak, there is always something I can relate to.
December 8, 2023
3.5
Saw this at the thrift and read it in the store because of the nice cover and short poem format. It’s about love and it made me almost cry, even if you’re not a fan of poems check it out
Saw this at the thrift and read it in the store because of the nice cover and short poem format. It’s about love and it made me almost cry, even if you’re not a fan of poems check it out
January 18, 2024
“someone that is meant to be a part of your life will fall in the palms of your hands. All of your questions will be answered. All of your desires will be gratified. And life will finally feel simple in the most extraordinary way.”
June 3, 2023
This was truly beautiful 😭😭. I resonated a lot with this and I teared up with a certain poem. I really admire the self-work and deep-work you did to get to this point. It’s really heartbreaking, but you made art. What you did is what I would like to do. Thank you for sharing your heart and malfunction of it with the world! 🥹🫂💕✨
January 18, 2023
Very beautifully written, my favorite part was coming of age tranquility. I would have really enjoyed it if that part was longer. 3.5 stars
November 11, 2024
This ripped my heart out and stomped on it and it was beautiful and authentic and raw and captured love and the ever evolving wheel of reimagining your life and desires so well. Lots of crying. 10/10!
January 12, 2023
i normally dont fw poetry but i enjoyed this!! i found certain poems a bit repetitive? but honestly i did love it
March 17, 2023
I'll be honest I'm relatively new to poetry (unless you count LDR's poetry book lol). I bought this on whim after seeing a tiktok and immediately got to reading. Only about 15ish poems really stood out to me, the rest felt...repetitive. We get it: you're gay, fell in love, and then you guys broke up. I didn't need 50 "poems" telling me the same thing over and over again. Most didn't really feel like poems, they felt like scribbled thoughts. They were quite straightfoward and felt rushed. I finished the entire collection in a day... Only a very few felt very deep or heartfelt to me.
October 30, 2024
I picked up this book after discovering it was authored by a gay and openly devout Christian man—a perspective that obviously piqued my interest. With a bit of reflection, I realized that if I were a conventionally attractive white gay man, I, too, would most definitely find Christianity an appealing fit. Western Christianity is inherently designed to prioritize the comfort of white men, and selectively embracing elements to feel at ease makes sense in that context. My main takeaway from this book? Writing and publishing a book clearly can’t be that difficult.
Unlike the author’s relatively seamless portrayal, my own journey with sexuality, religion, trauma, and healing has been anything but straightforward. While a few lines struck a genuine chord, much of the content in this book feels superficial, reminding me why we don’t need yet another narrative and platform from another cisgendered white gay man. Honestly, I’m tired of stories by gay men with “pretty privilege” that come across as veiled self-promotion, presented as though they offer essential insight and peaceful healing.
Unlike the author’s relatively seamless portrayal, my own journey with sexuality, religion, trauma, and healing has been anything but straightforward. While a few lines struck a genuine chord, much of the content in this book feels superficial, reminding me why we don’t need yet another narrative and platform from another cisgendered white gay man. Honestly, I’m tired of stories by gay men with “pretty privilege” that come across as veiled self-promotion, presented as though they offer essential insight and peaceful healing.
July 18, 2023
damn das war eines der schönsten poetrybücher die ich je gelesen hab
June 2, 2023
Quite mid tbh, put me in such a reading slump because I was quite bored reading it. A few good quotes. May just not be my kind of book
December 25, 2025
elementary level writing. there are plenty of worthwhile ideas in here, and I think the speaker’s struggle is quite powerful; but the overly didactic, simplistic writing style just took me completely out of it.
this collection feels like it was written to be distributed on TikTok to some slow reverb remix; the literature itself simply doesn’t provoke on it’s own, it refuses to explore complexities, it lacks a real sense of depth, and it lacks a respect for the medium as well.
there’s no understanding of rhythm or meter in the poems, the line breaks are at times jarring and disengaging—it’s just bad poetry.
I feel like this collection would have been a lot stronger if it was actually in conversation with the feelings at its core; instead it’s in conversation with the audience, hoping to tell us a story we might believe instead of giving us a story to actually hold on to.
but that would actually be difficult work; work that requires honesty and work that would take time…two things which are unfortunately incongruent with today’s artistic world.
feels like wasted potential.
this collection feels like it was written to be distributed on TikTok to some slow reverb remix; the literature itself simply doesn’t provoke on it’s own, it refuses to explore complexities, it lacks a real sense of depth, and it lacks a respect for the medium as well.
there’s no understanding of rhythm or meter in the poems, the line breaks are at times jarring and disengaging—it’s just bad poetry.
I feel like this collection would have been a lot stronger if it was actually in conversation with the feelings at its core; instead it’s in conversation with the audience, hoping to tell us a story we might believe instead of giving us a story to actually hold on to.
but that would actually be difficult work; work that requires honesty and work that would take time…two things which are unfortunately incongruent with today’s artistic world.
feels like wasted potential.
October 29, 2024
2/5
Even for 'sad boi' poetry, Feeling This Way felt incohesive, repetitive, and lackluster. While there were a few impactful moments that captured my attention, most of the poems fell somewhere between mediocre and outright cringy. To the author’s credit, I do believe that Ben Esqueda has a genuine grasp on the pain of heartbreak, but again, these moments were overshadowed by a style that often felt stilted and underdeveloped. If you’re seeking a quick read to serve as a reminder that someone else out there understands love-lost, this collection might be worth a look. Just don’t go in expecting an abundance of originality or depth.
Even for 'sad boi' poetry, Feeling This Way felt incohesive, repetitive, and lackluster. While there were a few impactful moments that captured my attention, most of the poems fell somewhere between mediocre and outright cringy. To the author’s credit, I do believe that Ben Esqueda has a genuine grasp on the pain of heartbreak, but again, these moments were overshadowed by a style that often felt stilted and underdeveloped. If you’re seeking a quick read to serve as a reminder that someone else out there understands love-lost, this collection might be worth a look. Just don’t go in expecting an abundance of originality or depth.
November 15, 2023
This book was an amazing read, to be able to feel the emotions and to even get to understand why the character felt certain ways. It was beautiful poem book, that deserves to be read, it goes over heartbreak and growing to love yourself which really just stood out to me and at times the small poems of being confused within who we are without the person we love resonated to me.
--definitively should give the book a chance.
--definitively should give the book a chance.
April 10, 2023
5 star perfect bed time wind down read- it’s poems about his relationships and so you can choose how much you want to read into it and whether w you want to interpret a plot- pick up and down anytime as meditative experience before bed- allows you to remember to stick up for yourself in relationships whiling deciding when sacrificing is is important or not
January 16, 2023
If you’ve read on earth we were briefly gorgeous your expectations may be too high for this. Some of the poems are beautiful and others aren’t. Great post break up read though, wish I had this in 2018!
March 30, 2023
Lovely poems about the way queer people feel while trying to find love. Didn’t really resonate with a lot of them at the time of reading but when I’m feeling those ways, this book will be great to go back to!
August 10, 2023
Love! The variety of form in these poems makes it really lovely to read and makes the emotions truly jump off the page. My favorite section was by far the last. Such a beautiful self love note to cap off the sad poems in the sections prior. Will be revisiting!
October 6, 2024
‘I once was a trophy
Now just change on the floor
Waiting for someone to want me.’ —page 73
Even if I didn’t LOVE this, it was amazing. Will definitely be re reading some of this.
7.7/10, finally. Some good fucking poetry.
Now just change on the floor
Waiting for someone to want me.’ —page 73
Even if I didn’t LOVE this, it was amazing. Will definitely be re reading some of this.
7.7/10, finally. Some good fucking poetry.
December 29, 2024
This may have healed from all of the situationships and heartbreaks i had this year. It is truly wonderful and special to me. I'm so glad I read it. It is one of the most reliable poetry I've ever encountered.
September 24, 2025
The last chapter was my personal favorite. Coming of age tranquility. I love watching people heal through words and Ben has done it beautifully. A few very good poems in there that I might always go back to. Getting this glimpse into another person’s thoughts about love felt amazing.
December 31, 2022
4.5 ⭐️
April 4, 2023
Very quick and Easy read. felt like it was overall pretty repetitive but I did resonate with a few poems. I did cry on those that Glued to me.
April 13, 2023
it was a beautiful story, i think if i related more i would have absolutely loved it but maybe it’s just not the right time for now.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 54 reviews