Shattered: A Son Picks Up the Pieces of His Father's Rage

by Arthur Boers, Andre Dubus III (Foreword)

A sensitive and penetrating reflection on coming of age in a Dutch immigrant family scarred by violence  
 
Arthur Boers’s earliest memory was of shattered glass. His father threw a potted plant at his mother, and she ducked as the plant crashed through a window of the family home. His mother cleaned up the shards that day; later in life, he would find himself called upon to pick up the pieces as well.  
 
In  Shattered , Boers reflects on coming of age in a family scarred by violence. The son of Dutch immigrants, Boers illuminates the generational trauma of the Nazi occupation of Holland, refracted in vignettes of his boyhood in postwar Canada. His hard-working, Calvinist family is endearing but ultimately unable to address the insidious cycle of abuse that passed father to son. Breaking with this silence and complicity, Boers reflects candidly and empathetically on his tumultuous relationship with his father. Intertwined with this narrative is his emerging vocation to ministry, more mystical and expressive than the Reformed tradition in which he was raised. 
 
Forthright and authentic, Boers extends a hand in solidarity to readers who have been wounded by those who were meant to protect them the most. With  Shattered , he charts a path toward healing through faith.

Genres: Memoir

216 pages, Hardcover

First published May 9, 2023

About the author

Arthur Paul Boers holds the R. J. Bernardo Family Chair of Leadership at Tyndale Seminary (Toronto, Canada). He is an ordained Mennonite minister and Benedictine oblate. He served for over sixteen years as a pastor in rural, urban, and church-planting settings in the USA and Canada.

Boers is an author. His newest book is Living into Focus: Choosing What Matters in an Age of Distractions. (Brazos, 2012). His other books are The Way is Made by Walking: A Pilgrimage Along the Camino de Santiago (InterVarsity, 2007) The Rhythm of Gods Grace (Paraclete, 2003); Never Call Them Jerks: Healthy Responses to Difficult Behavior (Alban, 1999); Lord, Teach Us to Pray: A New Look at the Lord's Prayer (Herald, 1992); Justice that Heals: A Biblical Vision for Victims and Offenders (Faith and Life, 1992); On Earth as in Heaven: Justice Rooted in Spirituality (Herald, 1991); He is co-editor of Take Our Moments and Our Days: An Anabaptist Prayer Book (Herald, 2007).

Boers earned the following degrees: D. Min. with distinction in worship and spirituality (Northern Baptist Theological Seminary), M. Th. in Pastoral Counseling (Waterloo Lutheran Seminary), M. Div. (McCormick Theological Seminary), M.A. in Peace Studies (Associated Mennonite Biblical Seminary), B.A. (University of Western Ontario). He is Book Review Editor for Conrad Grebel Review. For many years he served as columnist and editorial advisor for Christian Ministry, The Builder and as contributing editor to The Other Side. His articles and reviews have been published in Biblical Preaching Journal, Catholic New Times, Christian Century, Christianity Today, Congregations, Leadership, St. Anthony Messenger, and Sojourners.

Hobbies include hiking, canoeing, kayaking, and windsurfing. In 2005, he walked the 500 mile pilgrimage route, the Camino de Santiago in Spain, the experience which formed the basis for his newest book. He is also an Indiana Master Naturalist. Boers is a Canadian, the oldest son of Dutch immigrants. He is married to Lorna McDougall, a nurse practioner. They are the parents of two young adult children."

Reviews

[Jeff Bjorgan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Arthur Boers latest book, a memoir, walks the reader through his life as a boy growing up in a Dutch immigrant family in Canada. Although the story puts a light on the unique history of the Dutch in Canada, especially in Southern Ontario, the fulcrum of the book is the complicated relationship the author had with his father.

Entitled "Shattered", Boers weaves the theme of glass throughout his life story, both literally and figuratively. His father installed glass on greenhouses, and also had a propensity to shatter glass, particular during fits of anger. Shattered glass is quite a metaphor for shattered relationships, and throughout the memoir, Boers reflects on the character of glass and how it relates to his own journey and his own character.

Boers is a very good writer, writing simple and pure sentences that often combine into a poetic cadence. (Near the end of the book, his eye for detail and sense of boyhood wonder echoed Annie Dillard in her "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek"). Although reading about an entwined story of both abuse and dutch history wasn't something I would call a joyful experience, it felt like I was reading something good and right. There is a tone of wistfulness, perhaps even loneliness through the book. Perhaps the wistfulness was early on when it came to unmet expectations with his father and the loneliness came with age, with a sense of what could have been.

On the otherside of the emotional coin, the book is wonderfully rooted. I loved that it was a Canadian story. The geography was earthy; Boers paints pictures of place very well. The descriptions of Canadiana reminded me of reading Farley Mowat. I spent time looking up the places in Ontario that Boers described and tried to imagine what they would have looked back a few decades ago. Canada is large, but connected, with much shared history, and is many ways still a very young country. The Dutch migration didn't take place that long ago.

I also really appreciated reading the author's ecumenical journey and the list of people who had joined him on his spiritual journey. We really are formed by the lives of others, and the ability to connect with our heroes in positive ways may be easier than we realize.

My primary critique of the book would be the title. Although the theme of abuse and an estranged relationship between a father and son shaped the book, it felt far more like an experienced history of Dutch culture in Canada. Although I would definitely recommend it to someone who is looking for perspective and healing when it comes to parental abuse, I would be concerned that those looking for an engaging piece of Canadian history, may be hesitant due to the tagline of the book. Titles are difficult things, but changing the title up to something like, "Through Shards of Glass: Picking through the pieces of growing up Dutch" may have been helpful.

But this is a small critique. Above all, if you are looking for a good Canadian writer, look no further than what Boers offers. You will be glad you did.

[Douglas Brouwer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh my, I just now finished reading Arthur Boers' beautifully written new memoir, Shattered. What an honest, wrenching, painful, but ultimately grace-filled story. Arthur and I share a Christian Reformed background - with all that that entails - but our lives are different too, starting with his Canadian childhood and my American one. Our paths have even crossed a couple of times over the years for professional reasons. We have enough in common, however, that the details of his life were often vivid reminders of my own story. Arthur's story unexpectedly pulled me in; I experienced his pain and questions and more, as though I had lived through his childhood with him. That's a tribute to his compelling prose, but also, as I mentioned, to his honesty. To me - spoiler alert - the moment in Arthur's story that felt most redemptive was (near the end) the hug he received from the Dutch writer and theologian Henri Nouwen. Arthur received something from Nouwen that he had longed all his life to receive from his father. Very moving and tear producing.

[Peggy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading this book, because I always find it interesting to learn about other peoples' lives. This is a memoir, but covers so much more than family abuse. There are also themes of immigrant life and even glass (his father constructs greenhouses and also throws and breaks glass when angry). It is poignant how hard the young boy tried to win his father's love and approval, in spite of his behaviour. The author was able to reverse the pattern of abusive fathers in his own family and became a minister. I found it fascinating how he developed a relationship with God. He felt God was speaking to him. It was also interesting to me how he changed denominations several times over his career (although always Protestant). When you think that historically, different sects or denominations have warred against each other, it puts it into perspective.

[Marilyn McEntyre · Rating 4 out of 5]

The words that come to mind as I think back over the story Arthur Boers tells in this book about abuse in a strict Dutch Calvinist family are "sanity" and "grace." He deals with scenes and themes that might easily be (and often have been) oversimplified or caricatured or sensationalized with a healthy detachment that speaks eloquently of his own maturity, capacity for forgiveness, compassion for those who suffer as children and for those who stay in the church but have to navigate the particular kinds of mistreatment churches can inflict, sometimes inadvertently. It's a rather old-fashioned word, but I was edified. Also moved. But I like the word edified--the book taught me and reminded me of a quality of mercy it's good to reimagine.

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

In spite of the pain, there is hope here is as well. Arthur details the abuse he received as a child, and then recounts how he tried to carry on in the rest of his life. He did. While he has an ambivalent relationship with his memories, he has himself turned the corner, and chosen a different path. With reflections on the role spirituality has played in his life. Well worth a read. I couldn't put it down.

[Vivian Bender · Rating 4 out of 5]

With a mix of Dutch Calvinist, Mennonite and Anglican Christian experience, I especially (with similar family church history) found several aspects relatable. Though the book is described as focussing closely on his relationship with his rageful father, this memoir is more broad sweeping than that.

[J. Bill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Arthur Boers has long been one of my favorite authors. This sensitive, moving book confirms that standing. I'm just sorry I took so long in getting read. I highly recommend it!