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I'll See You Tomorrow: Building Relational Resilience When You Want to Quit
In a culture where people easily and hastily cancel relationships rather than cultivate them, discover what the Bible has to say about how we need to keep showing up for one another—even when we feel like walking away.
We are surrounded by choices. If we want to watch a movie, we have multiple platforms we can choose from. If we grow tired of a friend or conversation, we leave them on read. It's never been easier to tune out and make a switch when something doesn't go perfectly or when we are offended. It's easy to cancel something from our lives when it comes to technology, television shows, or choices of food and drinks. But what about canceling friends or family members when we are disappointed or offended by them?
In I'll See You Tomorrow, communication professor Dr. Heather Thompson Day and Seth Day tackle difficulties that people face in relationships and help them navigate through relational disappointment, conflict, and fear. The dangers of a relational cancel culture are a timely one. This book will help
learn to extend grace to yourself and your loved ones in order to forgive and keep showing up,discover how childhood trauma continues to affect your relationships,stop waiting for an ideal and refuse to let it prevent you from what's possible,recognize the value of a healthy (and small) circle rather than a large one, and refuse to let fear of what may or may not happen cause you to miss the beauty of what is.Blending personal stories with data and research in a way that inspires truth and helps people change their everyday mindsets, Heather and Seth encourage you to embrace this valuable relationships don't have to be perfect to be fulfilling.
We are surrounded by choices. If we want to watch a movie, we have multiple platforms we can choose from. If we grow tired of a friend or conversation, we leave them on read. It's never been easier to tune out and make a switch when something doesn't go perfectly or when we are offended. It's easy to cancel something from our lives when it comes to technology, television shows, or choices of food and drinks. But what about canceling friends or family members when we are disappointed or offended by them?
In I'll See You Tomorrow, communication professor Dr. Heather Thompson Day and Seth Day tackle difficulties that people face in relationships and help them navigate through relational disappointment, conflict, and fear. The dangers of a relational cancel culture are a timely one. This book will help
learn to extend grace to yourself and your loved ones in order to forgive and keep showing up,discover how childhood trauma continues to affect your relationships,stop waiting for an ideal and refuse to let it prevent you from what's possible,recognize the value of a healthy (and small) circle rather than a large one, and refuse to let fear of what may or may not happen cause you to miss the beauty of what is.Blending personal stories with data and research in a way that inspires truth and helps people change their everyday mindsets, Heather and Seth encourage you to embrace this valuable relationships don't have to be perfect to be fulfilling.
240 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 4, 2022
50 people are currently reading
3767 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews
January 1, 2023
This was good but a lot more surface-level than I wanted. I was happy that they quoted so much scripture but otherwise the points they were making were pretty basic.
And there were soooooo many illustrative stories per chapter. I’m sure that works better for some readers but I would read the illustrative story, and then they’d have a sentence or two relating that story to relationships or whatever they were talking about, and then move on. There was very little breakdown of practical steps you could take to make your relationships stronger.
Some of the book was great—I especially appreciated the analysis of how the COVID-19 pandemic has affected our mental health and relationships, and the discussion of the difference between maintaining healthy boundaries and not giving up on people after one bad experience.
Overall not the book I wanted but it earned a “good” rating.
And there were soooooo many illustrative stories per chapter. I’m sure that works better for some readers but I would read the illustrative story, and then they’d have a sentence or two relating that story to relationships or whatever they were talking about, and then move on. There was very little breakdown of practical steps you could take to make your relationships stronger.
Some of the book was great—I especially appreciated the analysis of how the COVID-19 pandemic has affected our mental health and relationships, and the discussion of the difference between maintaining healthy boundaries and not giving up on people after one bad experience.
Overall not the book I wanted but it earned a “good” rating.
Read
October 9, 2022We all need each other, and this book outlines why. I like the message as a whole, but it's the zingy and concise one-to-two-liners that are going to stick with me.
January 16, 2023
There is a staggering number of books these days about setting boundaries, cutting off toxic people, and ending relationships of every kind. However, if someone wants guidance about persevering through typical friendship challenges and coming out securely on the other side, there are very few resources available for them. Thus, ever since high school, I have gotten most of my friendship advice from marriage books.
I felt excited and hopeful for this book, but even though it has a lot of great elements, I found it disappointing. Too much of the book revolves around the authors' personal experiences, and they don't share much practical advice for implementing the generalized, positive ideas they encourage people towards. However, I want to focus on the positives first.
Heather Thompson Day and her husband, Seth, wrote this book to help people who are tempted to give up on existing relationships or don't have many friendships to begin with. They share vulnerable stories about their own experiences, offer encouragement, and draw on Christian teachings and social science data to support why relationships matter so much and why we should keep pursuing them.
Fairly early on in the book, Heather and Seth write about boundary-setting and appropriate reasons to end or distance yourself from a relationship. They both talk about their own backgrounds with abusive people, and about ways that people can protect themselves. They clarify that their call to commitment is for safe relationships, and that there are appropriate times to walk away. The authors repeatedly differentiate between harmful patterns and unpleasant incidents, showing that you can set boundaries against unsafe people without dumping a good friend over a hurtful comment or perceived social infraction.
The authors unpack how past trauma and emotionally unhealthy coping patterns can influence our responses to issues in friendships, and they share general advice for how people can overcome negative patterns to pursue healthy, well-grounded relationships. They also address specific contemporary issues related to how the pandemic disrupted relationships and created additional stresses that are wreaking havoc on many people's lives. I particularly appreciated the chapter about how important "weak ties" are, since people rarely acknowledged before the pandemic how powerfully our acquaintances influence and benefit us.
However, even though this book has a lot of great elements, I don't think that it fulfilled the promise of the title and premise. Too much of this book is about Heather and Seth, and even though their fans and social media followers may love this deeper glimpse into their personal lives, I am only vaguely familiar with their ministries and was reading this for practical advice, not for their personal disclosures. It disappointed me how often they would tell a long-winded personal story and then highlight a couple life lessons without sharing practical advice for someone in a different situation.
This book is full of wise ideas and positive encouragements, but they rarely show the reader how to put these things into practice in the real world. For example, if you are struggling to stay friends with someone across the political aisle, Heather and Seth will encourage you to resist polarization and stay friends with them, but they don't show you how to make this a long-term reality. They don't share any practical advice for dealing with politically charged conflicts, and don't even talk you through how to deal with your feelings about them.
If someone hasn't thought much about friendship before or places a low priority on their relationships, then this book could offer some helpful paradigm shifts and encouragement for them to change. However, if someone is looking for practical advice to go beyond their good beliefs and head knowledge, this book will rarely deliver. It affirms a lot of great values, but it doesn't share the kind of targeted, practical advice that most people pursuing a book like this need.
I wish that I had something better to recommend, but I don't really. I know of some great books about friendship, such as Kelly Needham's Friendish, but her main theme is about avoiding codependency and idolatry, rather than overcoming burnout, conflict, and resentment. I am still waiting for the right book about persevering through conflict and polarization in friendships, and even though this book was good, I'm disappointed that it didn't live up to the promise of its title. I wanted a book about "building relational resilience when you want to quit," but this is too general and doesn't offer enough concrete, practical insight.
I received a temporary digital copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
I felt excited and hopeful for this book, but even though it has a lot of great elements, I found it disappointing. Too much of the book revolves around the authors' personal experiences, and they don't share much practical advice for implementing the generalized, positive ideas they encourage people towards. However, I want to focus on the positives first.
Heather Thompson Day and her husband, Seth, wrote this book to help people who are tempted to give up on existing relationships or don't have many friendships to begin with. They share vulnerable stories about their own experiences, offer encouragement, and draw on Christian teachings and social science data to support why relationships matter so much and why we should keep pursuing them.
Fairly early on in the book, Heather and Seth write about boundary-setting and appropriate reasons to end or distance yourself from a relationship. They both talk about their own backgrounds with abusive people, and about ways that people can protect themselves. They clarify that their call to commitment is for safe relationships, and that there are appropriate times to walk away. The authors repeatedly differentiate between harmful patterns and unpleasant incidents, showing that you can set boundaries against unsafe people without dumping a good friend over a hurtful comment or perceived social infraction.
The authors unpack how past trauma and emotionally unhealthy coping patterns can influence our responses to issues in friendships, and they share general advice for how people can overcome negative patterns to pursue healthy, well-grounded relationships. They also address specific contemporary issues related to how the pandemic disrupted relationships and created additional stresses that are wreaking havoc on many people's lives. I particularly appreciated the chapter about how important "weak ties" are, since people rarely acknowledged before the pandemic how powerfully our acquaintances influence and benefit us.
However, even though this book has a lot of great elements, I don't think that it fulfilled the promise of the title and premise. Too much of this book is about Heather and Seth, and even though their fans and social media followers may love this deeper glimpse into their personal lives, I am only vaguely familiar with their ministries and was reading this for practical advice, not for their personal disclosures. It disappointed me how often they would tell a long-winded personal story and then highlight a couple life lessons without sharing practical advice for someone in a different situation.
This book is full of wise ideas and positive encouragements, but they rarely show the reader how to put these things into practice in the real world. For example, if you are struggling to stay friends with someone across the political aisle, Heather and Seth will encourage you to resist polarization and stay friends with them, but they don't show you how to make this a long-term reality. They don't share any practical advice for dealing with politically charged conflicts, and don't even talk you through how to deal with your feelings about them.
If someone hasn't thought much about friendship before or places a low priority on their relationships, then this book could offer some helpful paradigm shifts and encouragement for them to change. However, if someone is looking for practical advice to go beyond their good beliefs and head knowledge, this book will rarely deliver. It affirms a lot of great values, but it doesn't share the kind of targeted, practical advice that most people pursuing a book like this need.
I wish that I had something better to recommend, but I don't really. I know of some great books about friendship, such as Kelly Needham's Friendish, but her main theme is about avoiding codependency and idolatry, rather than overcoming burnout, conflict, and resentment. I am still waiting for the right book about persevering through conflict and polarization in friendships, and even though this book was good, I'm disappointed that it didn't live up to the promise of its title. I wanted a book about "building relational resilience when you want to quit," but this is too general and doesn't offer enough concrete, practical insight.
I received a temporary digital copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
February 28, 2023
I don’t know if it’s my age or the times we are in, but I am not quick to read an unfamiliar Christian author. If a title intrigues me I will read a short overview and then usually pass it by. I am so glad I gave this book a try (and in good part because Beth Moore wrote the forward). This is a book for everyone who has any broken relationships, anyone who is puzzled and possibly despairing about where Christianity in America finds itself today, anyone who has a friend, needs a friend or wants to be a better friend—in short, everyone.
Despite their young age, Seth and Heather have a true depth of lived experience, which never comes without pain. And because they write from a place of restored brokenness, they also write with authentic humility. These perspectives produce real, insightful and valuable wisdom. This is definitely not a “5 steps to…”. It is scripturally based and keeps calling the reader back to the foundational love in the Gospel even when offering some practical steps and ideas to consider. Above all it is a book to remind one of hope even in the midst of pain.
I’m not really satisfied with my review…Maybe I should have just said, “This is a book you should read.”
Despite their young age, Seth and Heather have a true depth of lived experience, which never comes without pain. And because they write from a place of restored brokenness, they also write with authentic humility. These perspectives produce real, insightful and valuable wisdom. This is definitely not a “5 steps to…”. It is scripturally based and keeps calling the reader back to the foundational love in the Gospel even when offering some practical steps and ideas to consider. Above all it is a book to remind one of hope even in the midst of pain.
I’m not really satisfied with my review…Maybe I should have just said, “This is a book you should read.”
October 24, 2022
Much of our society is disconnected and lonely. Podcaster (Viral Jesus) and author Heather Thompson Day and her husband Pastor Seth Day talk about the importance of meaningful friendships and relationships. Usually when Christian couples write books together, the result is a "how-to-do-marriage". The Day's book is refreshingly different covering friendships and all kinds of relationships. Based on the story of Michael Jordan losing a critical basketball game and having his trainer come up to him and ask, "When will I see you?" Jordan's reply was "I'll See You Tomorrow". Heather and Seth give good advice about how to be a good friend and also have boundaries with toxic people. This is definitely worth picking up!
November 18, 2022
In a culture that cancels and gravitates toward relational chaos, I’ve been blessed to hear the godly truth sung out by authors, Heather Thompson Day & Seth Day in their new book, “I’ll See You Tomorrow.” This book doesn’t deny that relationships can be one of the most painful aspects of life, but it comes with the message of hope: relationships are worth it. And why is that so hopeful? Because none of us is perfect and all of us are worth fighting for. Though they wisely acknowledge that not all relationships are safe to continue, most simply require hard work that is worth doing. So when we’re weary and stressed and it would seem to be the easiest thing to cut people off, Heather and Seth point to a better way, a way God demonstrates for us.
March 27, 2023
Heather and Seth Day are the friends we desperately need in our current age—they are humble, abounding in love, and slow to speak. Their words are bathed in nuance, encased in genuineness, and overflowing with grace. I'll See You Tomorrow is the read for you if you desire growth in and a healthier understanding of your human relationships, as well as a deeper insight into the promise of that which is “abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us” (Ephesians 3:20).
October 29, 2023
Heather and Seth weave together a cohesive story that's brimming with hope. They blend research, scripture, and personal experience with a seamlessness that only comes from genuine compassion and calling. With their personal, gentle, and honest approach, reading this book felt like sitting down with a close friend over a cup of tea. Like the refreshing feeling of breathing crisp, fresh autumn air. Seth and Heather give readers ample space to both heal from the past and gain joyful hope for the future.
December 18, 2022
I loved the book. I really like how they each took turns and wrote; It was cohesive and showed how each of them viewed situations. I feel like tge information in this book will not only be useful in my relationship with my partner but also all relationships in life. As I read through the book I laughed, I made notations, I thought deeply, and I boo-hooed!
Excellent job writing together! Definitely blessed!
Excellent job writing together! Definitely blessed!
March 18, 2023
Mmmm I wish I could’ve given this more stars!! Was super intrigued by the premise of building relational resilience as our culture is quick to cancel, cut off, and quit on people. There were some helpful frameworks, reflection questions, and studies that spoke to the necessity of community, but this book was filled to the brim with personal illustrations when I would’ve loved to see more practical help and a more clear-cut vision of what relational perseverance could look like.
March 5, 2024
The perfect anecdote to a culture obsessed with cancelling others and ending relationships in the name of drawing boundaries. While there are times for both of those, the authors lay out clear, scripture-driven principles for persevering through relationships in a healthy way. A book dripping with grace & focused on community. “If your life is already full, how do you make someone else’s fuller? If you aren’t lonely, I assure you, someone else is” (143).
December 31, 2022
A really thought provoking book
This book counters the idea that we should drop people when a relationship gets difficult, and tells us how to hold on through the inevitable challenges of friendships throughout life. It’s a strong guide on resilience in relationships, and very quotable.
This book counters the idea that we should drop people when a relationship gets difficult, and tells us how to hold on through the inevitable challenges of friendships throughout life. It’s a strong guide on resilience in relationships, and very quotable.
April 19, 2023
While I'm not a religious person, this book does add value. For me, it wasn't the scriptures quoted that made this book valuable but the focus on humans. We are all broken. We are all lost. We all need people to find our way. The balance of religion and good advice was balanced in my opinion.
May 26, 2023
The authors share so many scenarios from their past experiences, even from childhood, and studies to show how the negatives can be transformed, and must be transformed by allowing God to redeem them. They share how being in healthy community with others, however imperfect, and having at least one cheerleader, is important especially for the way we've become so polarized.
August 2, 2023
In clear, easy to understand language and examples, the Days show the value of relationships and community, the work it takes, and how to deal with the pain and hurt and fear it involves as you persevere. They share how they have lived this out along with biblical examples and modern day examples and research.
October 13, 2022
Amazing book on relationships. I loved the connection between past and future. Both matter. God is using us towards his purpose and if you are unsure of that in your life, you have got to read this book.
October 27, 2022
I'll See You Tomorrrow was an excellent unexpected read. The authors invite you into their lives and experiences and through those encourage healing and building relationships. They encourage you to show back up tomorrow.
December 2, 2022
If someone continues to disrespect your boundaries, the time may have come for you to respect their choice to no longer have a relationship... not all relationships are worth fighting for.
"Weak ties are still valuable."
"All of our ties have value."
"Weak ties are still valuable."
"All of our ties have value."
February 3, 2023
Another fantastic book from Heather Thompson Day, this one co-authored by her husband, Seth. Every chapter tells you why these two work so well together.
This is a healing book. I needed to read it and couldn’t help but think of many friends who would also appreciate it.
This is a healing book. I needed to read it and couldn’t help but think of many friends who would also appreciate it.
February 7, 2023
This book seemed promising but was a let down. Agree with other reviews of it feeling surface level. Too many illustrations and personal stories. Not enough strong practical application and challenging material. Scripture was quoted/referenced here and there, but was underwhelming.
March 11, 2023
I received this book in a giveaway and I couldn’t quite get into it. I didn’t read the whole book, because I didn’t feel my life was at a point for this book. It seemed promising for readers that would be able to relate more. I did give it to someone who I thought would find comfort from the read.
July 14, 2023
It was well-written and authentic, really enjoyed it. I enjoyed both authors perspectives and the contrast and wisdom from each. Lot of depth and beauty. important for the cancel culture conversation, but still felt like there was more that could have been expanded on.
August 2, 2023
Started this for a work book club but boy did this come at the right time. Heather has so much wisdom but to be given Seth’s perspective in this book was a gift. Learning to navigate relationships and how to show up for people while setting boundaries and acknowledging hard things is so important.
September 28, 2023
Anyone who quotes Michael Jordan is already a winner to me ..the bible references were mainly strong ones and connected well to each chapter's focus. I loved the three questions at the end of each chapter bc they made me engage and want to ask other people those questions.
January 2, 2024
I listened to the audiobook and honestly don't remember if I finished it. It wasn't bad, but felt like it jumped all over the place and I wasn't sure what their core message was supposed to be. Ended up letting my time run out on Hoopla.
December 2, 2024
8.5/10
-Story / Structure:+1
-Characters:+1
-Writing style:+.5
-Pacing:+.5
-Ending:+1
-Accuracy:+1
-Emotional impact:+1
-Overall enjoyment: +1
-Did The Author Impact My Viewpoint:+1
-Would I Recommend / Reread:+.5
-Story / Structure:+1
-Characters:+1
-Writing style:+.5
-Pacing:+.5
-Ending:+1
-Accuracy:+1
-Emotional impact:+1
-Overall enjoyment: +1
-Did The Author Impact My Viewpoint:+1
-Would I Recommend / Reread:+.5
October 30, 2022
So goooood. I felt like being under therapy while reading this. The whole time, I felt understood. 🥹🫶🏼
November 30, 2022
It feels like a way out from the toxic cancel culture. A call to “come and let us reason together.” (audio book)
January 1, 2023
Very slow start for me but got better as I got into it.
January 4, 2023
The perfect mix of life experience, research and scripture. Every adult would be helped by the deep dive into community and relationships. Def recommend the audiobook.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews