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Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal
The Breakfast Club meets Five Feet Apart in this big-hearted novel from debut author Gretchen Schreiber.
Ellie Haycock has always separated her life into sections: Ellie at home and Ellie at the hospital. At home, Ellie is a proud member of her high school’s speech and debate team alongside her best friend and her boyfriend. At the hospital, Ellie has a team of doctors and a mom who won’t stop posting about the details of her illness online. It’s not hard for Ellie to choose which of the two she prefers.
But this latest hospital stay is different. Ellie becomes close with a group of friends, including Ryan, a first-timer who’s still optimistic about the doctors that Ellie stopped trusting years ago. Despite their differences, she can’t seem to keep him out of her head. Ellie’s life has never been ordinary—but maybe this time it will be extraordinary.
Ellie Haycock has always separated her life into sections: Ellie at home and Ellie at the hospital. At home, Ellie is a proud member of her high school’s speech and debate team alongside her best friend and her boyfriend. At the hospital, Ellie has a team of doctors and a mom who won’t stop posting about the details of her illness online. It’s not hard for Ellie to choose which of the two she prefers.
But this latest hospital stay is different. Ellie becomes close with a group of friends, including Ryan, a first-timer who’s still optimistic about the doctors that Ellie stopped trusting years ago. Despite their differences, she can’t seem to keep him out of her head. Ellie’s life has never been ordinary—but maybe this time it will be extraordinary.
297 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 5, 2024
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 426 reviews
July 10, 2023
so first off thank you to netgalley for the digital e-arc of this book!
I have many thoughts on this book… a lot good, some bad.
I’ll start with what worked for me:
1. Her friends! Phenomenal friends, who showed up for her even when she didn’t want them to (minus Jack he makes me 🤢)
2. The general story. I grew up in a hospital, nearly five years on the endocrinology floor of a hospital. I could relate SO MUCH to a lot of this story. It felt like being sort of seen. I also like the ending where she isn’t like cured and done with her disabilities. That’s not how it works.
3. The characterization of doctors. Like for real, they aren’t always right and sometimes they treat lives as a science experiment. There was a bit too much doctor hate at one point. I don’t really respect people who say “all doctors are evil, stupid, and no good”… there are some AMAZING doctors out there, some who even saved my brother’s life. (That being said there were 1000% some crumby ones, I think this does a fair job of showing both sides).
What didn’t work for me:
1. Ellie as a character was too jaded and frankly annoying. I can understand her frustration, I really can, but she is too hateful and angry for me to want to cheer for her.
2. Ellies “non hospital people can’t understand unless they themselves are under the needle” mantra was also not acceptable, and frankly just not true. As someone who has been in this position, you CAN get a group of non medical people to understand. Granted, a lot of people don’t understand, but some real ones do.
3. The romance… I didn’t feel it 🤷🏻♀️
4. The mom/blog storyline. The mom just felt selfish and so did Ellie so I didn’t feel bad for either of them…
Overall, I liked the story! But there was too much hatred/anger/selfishness for me to want to read this and get excited for a happy ending, or at least an ending.
I have many thoughts on this book… a lot good, some bad.
I’ll start with what worked for me:
1. Her friends! Phenomenal friends, who showed up for her even when she didn’t want them to (minus Jack he makes me 🤢)
2. The general story. I grew up in a hospital, nearly five years on the endocrinology floor of a hospital. I could relate SO MUCH to a lot of this story. It felt like being sort of seen. I also like the ending where she isn’t like cured and done with her disabilities. That’s not how it works.
3. The characterization of doctors. Like for real, they aren’t always right and sometimes they treat lives as a science experiment. There was a bit too much doctor hate at one point. I don’t really respect people who say “all doctors are evil, stupid, and no good”… there are some AMAZING doctors out there, some who even saved my brother’s life. (That being said there were 1000% some crumby ones, I think this does a fair job of showing both sides).
What didn’t work for me:
1. Ellie as a character was too jaded and frankly annoying. I can understand her frustration, I really can, but she is too hateful and angry for me to want to cheer for her.
2. Ellies “non hospital people can’t understand unless they themselves are under the needle” mantra was also not acceptable, and frankly just not true. As someone who has been in this position, you CAN get a group of non medical people to understand. Granted, a lot of people don’t understand, but some real ones do.
3. The romance… I didn’t feel it 🤷🏻♀️
4. The mom/blog storyline. The mom just felt selfish and so did Ellie so I didn’t feel bad for either of them…
Overall, I liked the story! But there was too much hatred/anger/selfishness for me to want to read this and get excited for a happy ending, or at least an ending.
March 5, 2024
A REALLY great YA coming of age debut featuring a teen girl with a very unique condition (VATRS) that includes several serious disabilities and who also has a mommy blogger mother who has spent several years sharing her medical history with the world and just wants to be able to be a 'normal' highschooler.
This book discusses difficult topics from finding love with a physical disability, having autonomy over your own story and advocating for yourself with medical professionals. It’s also full of heart with a cute enemies to lovers romance.
Highly relatable and great on audio narrated by my absolute fav, Natalie Naudus!! Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for TWO beautiful finished copies and an audio copy in exchange for my honest review!!
This book discusses difficult topics from finding love with a physical disability, having autonomy over your own story and advocating for yourself with medical professionals. It’s also full of heart with a cute enemies to lovers romance.
Highly relatable and great on audio narrated by my absolute fav, Natalie Naudus!! Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for TWO beautiful finished copies and an audio copy in exchange for my honest review!!
March 14, 2024
Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal by Gretchen Schreiber
Thank you NetGalley, Macmillan Audio, and Wednesday Books for the free audiobook.
Blurb:
The Breakfast Club meets Five Feet Apart in this big-hearted novel from debut author Gretchen Schreiber.
✨My thoughts:
I really really enjoyed this story. I have never read or listened to a story like this because I don’t like to be sad on purpose but here we are. Natalie Naudus (narrator) had me completely lost in this story and had me feeling all of the things. With the talent of both the author and the narrator, it really set this book up for success. I loathe any parents that uses their children for blogs, YouTube etc. however, I ended up feeling for Ellie’s mom too. As a mother, she was also trying to cope and deal with the health of her daughter. Truthfully, my heart aches for Ellie. she has two separate lives, just trying to feel and be as “normal” as she possibly could in her shoes. I have not experienced a life like this but it felt all too real and my heart goes out to those who do. I think the narrator did a remarkable job telling this story and I hope the author is proud. Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal is out now!
Happy reading! 📖✨
Thank you NetGalley, Macmillan Audio, and Wednesday Books for the free audiobook.
Blurb:
The Breakfast Club meets Five Feet Apart in this big-hearted novel from debut author Gretchen Schreiber.
✨My thoughts:
I really really enjoyed this story. I have never read or listened to a story like this because I don’t like to be sad on purpose but here we are. Natalie Naudus (narrator) had me completely lost in this story and had me feeling all of the things. With the talent of both the author and the narrator, it really set this book up for success. I loathe any parents that uses their children for blogs, YouTube etc. however, I ended up feeling for Ellie’s mom too. As a mother, she was also trying to cope and deal with the health of her daughter. Truthfully, my heart aches for Ellie. she has two separate lives, just trying to feel and be as “normal” as she possibly could in her shoes. I have not experienced a life like this but it felt all too real and my heart goes out to those who do. I think the narrator did a remarkable job telling this story and I hope the author is proud. Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal is out now!
Happy reading! 📖✨
July 4, 2024
this was cute but she was kinda like pissing me off for a bit <3
still i really liked this and i do think it should be bigger coz its so funny and painfully real.
still i really liked this and i do think it should be bigger coz its so funny and painfully real.
January 17, 2025
Thank you to the publishers for my review copy of ELLIE HAYCOCK IS TOTALLY NORMAL.
I appreciate that the author told a story based on her own personal experience with disability, surgery, and ableism, but the finished product didn’t work for me. As I continue to ponder and digest the book, many aspects of the story and even the phrasing used makes me feel like the author hasn’t really reckoned with her own internalized ableism and is still trying to play by an ableist society’s rules rather than upending the status quo.
I’ve seen quite a few negative reviews calling Ellie selfish, stubborn, and unlikeable but that’s not the problem I had with this book. I get that she’s inconsistent and lashes out at times, but considering 1.) she’s dealing with a painful illness that no one can explain, 2.) her doctors aren’t taking her seriously, 3.) she’s had years and years of medical trauma, 4.) her parents aren’t respecting her wishes or allowing her to make decisions about her own medical care, and 5.) she’s treated like a zoo animal whenever she’s in public because of her physical disabilities, I think she had every right to be angry, prickly, and “unlikeable”. Heck, if I was in her situation I would be 200% more emotional and unhinged!
As I read more reviews, I’m starting to feel genuinely worried about people’s lack of empathy. My issue with the book was not with Ellie’s anger, hurt, or trauma, but the way the author seemed to try and paper over all of that in favor of a narrative that says the only person who can “fix” you is you… (This is a direct paraphrase from pg. 284 of the ebook edition.)
I don’t want to dismiss how important it is for you to accept and love yourself. For you to prioritize your healing and make good choices. But you also need things like medical care and community support! You deserve to be respected as a three dimensional human being! You can pull yourself up by the bootstraps all you like, but if you’re facing systemic discrimination/ableism, and no one takes you seriously, you will not be able to “fix” anything.
I felt like it was the other characters who needed more of a reckoning than Ellie… The character development felt uneven and inconsistent. At times, it seemed like they were just a mouthpiece for the author’s message. And to be honest I found that message leaning too close to toxic positivity for my taste. Yes, I do think Ellie needed to be honest with her friends and stop hiding her illness. I do think she needed to embrace her identity and take a larger role in her medical journey. But I felt like the book did us all a disservice by not acknowledging and holding more space for how hard it is to be chronically ill and how hard it is to navigate an ableist world. It’s hard to let people in when you’ve been hurt over and over again! I want to honor the hope in this story, but I think we also have to acknowledge grief and suffering at the same time.
I appreciated the book shining a light on the problems with “special needs mommy bloggers” but Ellie’s conflict with her mom felt like it was wrapped up too easily. The pacing was inconsistent and just as I felt like we were finally starting to get some real development and reckoning, the book ended with a neat little bow. I felt like Ellie’s trauma and mental health were ignored in favor of making a story that was palatable to a non-disabled audience.
I know that no one wants to read or write about COVID, but its absence in this story felt like a gaping black hole that couldn’t be ignored. Ellie’s disability is specifically related to her lungs and she spend the entire book with a mysterious cough. It’s finally decided that she must be extra sensitive to respiratory illness and poor air quality… But there’s no mention of masking. One of the side characters has cancer and is depicted as wearing a medical mask… But Ellie or her friends never mask for him. The story never delves into the actual reality of cancer patients.
I know that this book was based on the author’s experience as a teen which I’m guessing was at least 12 to 14 years ago but this book was published in 2024. Readers, especially chronically ill teens, deserve a book that truly depicts the issues of our time rather than sugar coating it all.
I’m still grappling with this book and the emotions it brought out in me. There are pieces that I connected with and parts that moved me, but overall it felt rang hollow for me and I can’t recommend it.
Instead, if you’re looking for a book about disabled teens falling in love in a hospital, I would recommend SICK KIDS IN LOVE by Hannah Moskowitz. If you’re looking for a book about a disabled teen trying to hide her disabilities, I would recommend CONDITIONS OF A HEART by Bethany Mangle.
I appreciate that the author told a story based on her own personal experience with disability, surgery, and ableism, but the finished product didn’t work for me. As I continue to ponder and digest the book, many aspects of the story and even the phrasing used makes me feel like the author hasn’t really reckoned with her own internalized ableism and is still trying to play by an ableist society’s rules rather than upending the status quo.
I’ve seen quite a few negative reviews calling Ellie selfish, stubborn, and unlikeable but that’s not the problem I had with this book. I get that she’s inconsistent and lashes out at times, but considering 1.) she’s dealing with a painful illness that no one can explain, 2.) her doctors aren’t taking her seriously, 3.) she’s had years and years of medical trauma, 4.) her parents aren’t respecting her wishes or allowing her to make decisions about her own medical care, and 5.) she’s treated like a zoo animal whenever she’s in public because of her physical disabilities, I think she had every right to be angry, prickly, and “unlikeable”. Heck, if I was in her situation I would be 200% more emotional and unhinged!
As I read more reviews, I’m starting to feel genuinely worried about people’s lack of empathy. My issue with the book was not with Ellie’s anger, hurt, or trauma, but the way the author seemed to try and paper over all of that in favor of a narrative that says the only person who can “fix” you is you… (This is a direct paraphrase from pg. 284 of the ebook edition.)
I don’t want to dismiss how important it is for you to accept and love yourself. For you to prioritize your healing and make good choices. But you also need things like medical care and community support! You deserve to be respected as a three dimensional human being! You can pull yourself up by the bootstraps all you like, but if you’re facing systemic discrimination/ableism, and no one takes you seriously, you will not be able to “fix” anything.
I felt like it was the other characters who needed more of a reckoning than Ellie… The character development felt uneven and inconsistent. At times, it seemed like they were just a mouthpiece for the author’s message. And to be honest I found that message leaning too close to toxic positivity for my taste. Yes, I do think Ellie needed to be honest with her friends and stop hiding her illness. I do think she needed to embrace her identity and take a larger role in her medical journey. But I felt like the book did us all a disservice by not acknowledging and holding more space for how hard it is to be chronically ill and how hard it is to navigate an ableist world. It’s hard to let people in when you’ve been hurt over and over again! I want to honor the hope in this story, but I think we also have to acknowledge grief and suffering at the same time.
I appreciated the book shining a light on the problems with “special needs mommy bloggers” but Ellie’s conflict with her mom felt like it was wrapped up too easily. The pacing was inconsistent and just as I felt like we were finally starting to get some real development and reckoning, the book ended with a neat little bow. I felt like Ellie’s trauma and mental health were ignored in favor of making a story that was palatable to a non-disabled audience.
I know that no one wants to read or write about COVID, but its absence in this story felt like a gaping black hole that couldn’t be ignored. Ellie’s disability is specifically related to her lungs and she spend the entire book with a mysterious cough. It’s finally decided that she must be extra sensitive to respiratory illness and poor air quality… But there’s no mention of masking. One of the side characters has cancer and is depicted as wearing a medical mask… But Ellie or her friends never mask for him. The story never delves into the actual reality of cancer patients.
I know that this book was based on the author’s experience as a teen which I’m guessing was at least 12 to 14 years ago but this book was published in 2024. Readers, especially chronically ill teens, deserve a book that truly depicts the issues of our time rather than sugar coating it all.
I’m still grappling with this book and the emotions it brought out in me. There are pieces that I connected with and parts that moved me, but overall it felt rang hollow for me and I can’t recommend it.
Instead, if you’re looking for a book about disabled teens falling in love in a hospital, I would recommend SICK KIDS IN LOVE by Hannah Moskowitz. If you’re looking for a book about a disabled teen trying to hide her disabilities, I would recommend CONDITIONS OF A HEART by Bethany Mangle.
April 29, 2023
This book has some good messaging around the importance of having ownership over your own story and autonomy, as well as the value of true friendship. However, I found Ellie to be so gosh darn stubborn and I found myself constantly frustrated with her lack of ability to try to see some of the good around her. She was her own worst enemy at times and it seemed like her character transformation was a bit rushed at the end.
All in all, I was left wishing there was a bit more depth to this novel. It certainly has the potential, just missed the mark for me.
I won an ARC of this book in a Goodreads giveaway.
All in all, I was left wishing there was a bit more depth to this novel. It certainly has the potential, just missed the mark for me.
I won an ARC of this book in a Goodreads giveaway.
February 24, 2024
Initial Thoughts
This was good! I had no idea what this book was about when I started listening. (Yes, I grabbed it for the cover alone.) It didn't take me very long before Ellie's story hooked me. The last thing that she wants is another surgery. She has worked so hard to keep her hospital life and her real life separate in an attempt to be what she believes is "normal". I really enjoyed seeing how much Ellie's group of friends at the hospital supported her. I listened to the audiobook and thought that the narrator did a great job with the story.
I received a digital review copy of this book from the publisher. Full review to be posted soon.
This was good! I had no idea what this book was about when I started listening. (Yes, I grabbed it for the cover alone.) It didn't take me very long before Ellie's story hooked me. The last thing that she wants is another surgery. She has worked so hard to keep her hospital life and her real life separate in an attempt to be what she believes is "normal". I really enjoyed seeing how much Ellie's group of friends at the hospital supported her. I listened to the audiobook and thought that the narrator did a great job with the story.
I received a digital review copy of this book from the publisher. Full review to be posted soon.
April 2, 2023
I received an uncorrected bound manuscript and uncorrected it was. I’m going to try not to hold all the punctuation and formatting errors against this because it is so early, but the first error was on page 16 and there were several commas/spaces missing. It just kept taking me out of the story
The actual story though is good. I connected a lot with it being that I also am chronically ill and have a phobia of needles like the main character. I also understood her not wanting to tell her school friends about everything going on. I liked the aspect of her mom running a blog, I feel like this is becoming a big problem nowadays on social media. Caitlin and Ryan were my fav characters. I didn’t really care about the whole Jack plotline because it sort of felt like a love triangle. I also like that this showed the reality of hospitals and how some doctors can be horrible but there are those with good intentions too.
Not sure when it’ll be revealed but I’m excited to see what the cover will look like!
The actual story though is good. I connected a lot with it being that I also am chronically ill and have a phobia of needles like the main character. I also understood her not wanting to tell her school friends about everything going on. I liked the aspect of her mom running a blog, I feel like this is becoming a big problem nowadays on social media. Caitlin and Ryan were my fav characters. I didn’t really care about the whole Jack plotline because it sort of felt like a love triangle. I also like that this showed the reality of hospitals and how some doctors can be horrible but there are those with good intentions too.
Not sure when it’ll be revealed but I’m excited to see what the cover will look like!
February 25, 2024
I love it when the writing is so good that the reader only has the responsibility of getting lost in the story. Gretchen Schreiber, thank you for writing a unique story like this! The world needs it - especially our teens.
Ellie Haycock has two groups of friends - her friends at her high school and her friends at the hospital, where she will often be for months at a time. She's in and out of treatments, surgeries, and procedures for a rare condition that she has had for a few years now. She doesn't want her school friends to know ANYTHING about what goes on at the hospital, especially her boyfriend, Jack. When she's finished at the hospital, she will go back to her "normal" life of speech competition and time with Brooke and Jack. Ellie doesn't trust doctors and her hospital friends Kaitlyn, Ryan, and Luis keep telling her she needs to trust them more because it looks like she will be here longer than expected. She keeps these two groups of friends at arms length, not letting them get too close. It's bad enough that her mom has a popular blog about every detail of her hospital life, telling the world how hard it is to have a daughter in and out of the hospital . She's watched her friend, Kaitlyn, go through several breakups since Kaitlyn is open and honest about her health with friends. Most people can't handle it. And when Ellie's boyfriend, Jack, shows up to the hospital to visit, she's faced with a decision of loyalty to her friends and herself.
As a High School teacher, I have had students that have lived Ellie's life. This struggle is absolutely real for them. I found this writing, the characters, the storyline, and settings to be heroic and real. I went through so many emotions reading this YA novel. I felt sadness in the ways Ellie had to build walls to protect herself from hurt. I felt completely angry at Ellie's all too realistic mom for blogging every detail of Ellie's life to the world. I found all of Ellie's hospital friends to be fun and incredibly loyal. I was even frustrated with Ellie at times for blaming her doctors and pushing her friends away. I was completely satisfied with the ending and so grateful I was given the chance to read this book.
The Audio edition is not yet available for review on Goodreads, so I selected this edition. In the audio recording, Natalie Nautis COMPLETELY captured every single character. Her voicing could not have been more perfect in drawing me in.
I am thankful to NetGalley, Gretchen Shreiber, and MacMillan Audio for the chance to read this AudioARC in exchange for my honest, original review.
Ellie Haycock has two groups of friends - her friends at her high school and her friends at the hospital, where she will often be for months at a time. She's in and out of treatments, surgeries, and procedures for a rare condition that she has had for a few years now. She doesn't want her school friends to know ANYTHING about what goes on at the hospital, especially her boyfriend, Jack. When she's finished at the hospital, she will go back to her "normal" life of speech competition and time with Brooke and Jack. Ellie doesn't trust doctors and her hospital friends Kaitlyn, Ryan, and Luis keep telling her she needs to trust them more because it looks like she will be here longer than expected. She keeps these two groups of friends at arms length, not letting them get too close. It's bad enough that her mom has a popular blog about every detail of her hospital life, telling the world how hard it is to have a daughter in and out of the hospital . She's watched her friend, Kaitlyn, go through several breakups since Kaitlyn is open and honest about her health with friends. Most people can't handle it. And when Ellie's boyfriend, Jack, shows up to the hospital to visit, she's faced with a decision of loyalty to her friends and herself.
As a High School teacher, I have had students that have lived Ellie's life. This struggle is absolutely real for them. I found this writing, the characters, the storyline, and settings to be heroic and real. I went through so many emotions reading this YA novel. I felt sadness in the ways Ellie had to build walls to protect herself from hurt. I felt completely angry at Ellie's all too realistic mom for blogging every detail of Ellie's life to the world. I found all of Ellie's hospital friends to be fun and incredibly loyal. I was even frustrated with Ellie at times for blaming her doctors and pushing her friends away. I was completely satisfied with the ending and so grateful I was given the chance to read this book.
The Audio edition is not yet available for review on Goodreads, so I selected this edition. In the audio recording, Natalie Nautis COMPLETELY captured every single character. Her voicing could not have been more perfect in drawing me in.
I am thankful to NetGalley, Gretchen Shreiber, and MacMillan Audio for the chance to read this AudioARC in exchange for my honest, original review.
August 2, 2024
Fantastic story with characters whom you will fall in love with and root for during Ellie’s search for friendship, autonomy, and love. The very last scene made me tear up. Will certainly be looking for more from Gretchen Schreiber…she is a new talent to watch!
March 11, 2024
This is hard to review because I really thought I was going to like this going into it. The premise sounded fascinating but the execution didn’t deliver-at least for me. The FMC was unlikelable and bitter and flat out rude, and I know that she was written that way as a result of being sick for so long but it just made it hard to root for her because she was just mean to everyone. It’s hard to cheer for someone who is mean, sick or not. She compartmentalizes her life-her hospital life and acquaintances and her school life and acquaintances and she doesn’t let the two cross because she feels like they wouldn’t understand each other. But who is she to decide that. Maybe that’s the YA viewpoint and I’m too old to get it. But that bugged me. And she would never try to explain her illness to anyone. Just “you wouldn’t get it” Again, I get that she’s been through a lot, but if you keep people out you can’t expect them to hang around. Idk. I just didn’t get the point of her being so jaded. Somewhat yes, but so blatantly was unnecessary. There was no chemistry in the romance either.
Maybe I’m just not the audience for this but it was a miss for me.
Thanks to St. Martins Press and NetGalley for this eArc in exchange for my review.
Maybe I’m just not the audience for this but it was a miss for me.
Thanks to St. Martins Press and NetGalley for this eArc in exchange for my review.
March 1, 2024
I have VACTERL, which the main character in this book has, and I I have never seen a VACTERL character in a novel and in this book there are TWO. There’s also romance, turbulent and brand new friendships, and Battlestar Galactica. The battle between keeping two separate identities - the disabled one and the “normal” one.
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I can’t review this book. It’s too personal to me. But what I can do is tell you what it means to me to see someone with my condition being on bookshelves… It’s freeing. It’s heartwarming. It would make me cry happy tears, if my tear ducts worked properly, because I grew up reading books with normative and able bodied characters. Characters I read about didn’t have missing limbs and organs and surgical scars. They have bleached white teeth and were normal.
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If you are a VACTERL adult, buy this book. If you are a mom of a VACTERL kid, especially a teen girl, buy this book. It doesn’t come out until March 5, but pre-order it now.
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I can’t review this book. It’s too personal to me. But what I can do is tell you what it means to me to see someone with my condition being on bookshelves… It’s freeing. It’s heartwarming. It would make me cry happy tears, if my tear ducts worked properly, because I grew up reading books with normative and able bodied characters. Characters I read about didn’t have missing limbs and organs and surgical scars. They have bleached white teeth and were normal.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you are a VACTERL adult, buy this book. If you are a mom of a VACTERL kid, especially a teen girl, buy this book. It doesn’t come out until March 5, but pre-order it now.
December 5, 2023
Rating: 4/5 Penguins
Quick Reasons: an intimate, emotional look into living with disabilities and the toll they take on a person's body and heart; hard-hitting, close to home as a person living with multiple disabilities; heart-wrenching; snarky, witty, entertaining; poignantly written
HUGE thanks to Gretchen Schreiber, Wednesday Books Publishing, and Netgalley for the ARC of this title! My review of this book is voluntarily written and in no way altered or impacted by this gesture.
"You're not your medical file, you know that, right?"
I shoot him a sideways glance. "Obviously, I'm cool."
"But like we could do this even if we weren't here."
"We wouldn't be doing this if we weren't here."
I switched it up, Penguins! I read something that ISN'T spicy and ISN'T about Death or Reapers and ISN'T supernatural or paranormal or fantasy! Are you proud of me?! Do I get to eat my tuna for dinner tonight?!?!?!
Okay, okay. I jest. Mostly. This story, while different from the hole I've fallen into lately with my reads, still hit home HARD. Because this is contemporary...and based on real-life experiences...and about disabilities. For those of you who haven't been following my page for a while, I live with multiple chronic illnesses/disabilities myself...and this book was HARD, because it made me face some things in myself that I haven't taken the time lately to truly think about. Namely...how I interact with the world, and with the people around me, while learning/growing/struggling with all the challenges I face from day to day. Gretchen Schreiber wrote what she knows, LITERALLY...and did so with a poignant grace and startling amount of humanity.
This is still, of course, your typical contemporary YA fiction/YA romance--there are still miscommunications, teenage angst scenes, SO MUCH drama, a 3rd act "break up", a fight to make up and make right...and, of course, a "happily for now" ending. But these characters are substantial. Their motivations, their fears, their struggles all play into and wrap themselves around you as you read, keeping you enthralled until the very end. I, admittedly, stayed up WAY too late last night finishing this because I just could not put it down with only 100 pages left....even though my eyes kept trying to force themselves closed.
I glare at Caitlin. "That why I keep--kept--it separate. Because people want an end. They want to say, You beat this, this is done, you are free --and that's not possible for some of us."
I definitely recommend this read to contemporary fiction aficionados, those who have or love someone with disabilities, and those looking for something close to reality....but not QUITE the real world. These characters are believable, their arcs are astounding, and this read is bound to leave you thinking (and feeling I suppose...but we don't talk about that). Take a walk on the human side, Penguins--maybe you'll find something there worth fighting for.
Quick Reasons: an intimate, emotional look into living with disabilities and the toll they take on a person's body and heart; hard-hitting, close to home as a person living with multiple disabilities; heart-wrenching; snarky, witty, entertaining; poignantly written
HUGE thanks to Gretchen Schreiber, Wednesday Books Publishing, and Netgalley for the ARC of this title! My review of this book is voluntarily written and in no way altered or impacted by this gesture.
"You're not your medical file, you know that, right?"
I shoot him a sideways glance. "Obviously, I'm cool."
"But like we could do this even if we weren't here."
"We wouldn't be doing this if we weren't here."
I switched it up, Penguins! I read something that ISN'T spicy and ISN'T about Death or Reapers and ISN'T supernatural or paranormal or fantasy! Are you proud of me?! Do I get to eat my tuna for dinner tonight?!?!?!
Okay, okay. I jest. Mostly. This story, while different from the hole I've fallen into lately with my reads, still hit home HARD. Because this is contemporary...and based on real-life experiences...and about disabilities. For those of you who haven't been following my page for a while, I live with multiple chronic illnesses/disabilities myself...and this book was HARD, because it made me face some things in myself that I haven't taken the time lately to truly think about. Namely...how I interact with the world, and with the people around me, while learning/growing/struggling with all the challenges I face from day to day. Gretchen Schreiber wrote what she knows, LITERALLY...and did so with a poignant grace and startling amount of humanity.
This is still, of course, your typical contemporary YA fiction/YA romance--there are still miscommunications, teenage angst scenes, SO MUCH drama, a 3rd act "break up", a fight to make up and make right...and, of course, a "happily for now" ending. But these characters are substantial. Their motivations, their fears, their struggles all play into and wrap themselves around you as you read, keeping you enthralled until the very end. I, admittedly, stayed up WAY too late last night finishing this because I just could not put it down with only 100 pages left....even though my eyes kept trying to force themselves closed.
I glare at Caitlin. "That why I keep--kept--it separate. Because people want an end. They want to say, You beat this, this is done, you are free --and that's not possible for some of us."
I definitely recommend this read to contemporary fiction aficionados, those who have or love someone with disabilities, and those looking for something close to reality....but not QUITE the real world. These characters are believable, their arcs are astounding, and this read is bound to leave you thinking (and feeling I suppose...but we don't talk about that). Take a walk on the human side, Penguins--maybe you'll find something there worth fighting for.
August 26, 2024
Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal by Gretchen Schreiber
Ellie Haylock is Totally Normal is a ya story of a teenage girl suffering from chronic medical problems that wants to just be normal. Elly is a typical teenager. She loves spending time with her friends and has a boyfriend. But when she gets sick again, you discover that parts of her life is anything but typical.
I loved the way the author portrayed the characters as regular kids, dealing with problems the way kids do. While their problems are much bigger than just who likes who, at the end of the day, they were just teenagers. Ellie tried to keep the two sides of her world come together, but this latest illness has made them collide. I enjoyed the characters. The author did a great job creating a wonderful group of characters that you love. This book definitely shines a light into parts of chronic illness that most people don’t know about. This book will make you go through a range of emotions.
I listened to the audiobook and really enjoyed the narrator Natalie Naudus.
Ellie Haylock is Totally Normal is a ya story of a teenage girl suffering from chronic medical problems that wants to just be normal. Elly is a typical teenager. She loves spending time with her friends and has a boyfriend. But when she gets sick again, you discover that parts of her life is anything but typical.
I loved the way the author portrayed the characters as regular kids, dealing with problems the way kids do. While their problems are much bigger than just who likes who, at the end of the day, they were just teenagers. Ellie tried to keep the two sides of her world come together, but this latest illness has made them collide. I enjoyed the characters. The author did a great job creating a wonderful group of characters that you love. This book definitely shines a light into parts of chronic illness that most people don’t know about. This book will make you go through a range of emotions.
I listened to the audiobook and really enjoyed the narrator Natalie Naudus.
March 8, 2024
Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal is an emotional and beautiful coming of age YA novel. All of the characters felt three dimensional and I had to remind myself several times that they weren’t real people
.
I loved how much time we spent with Ellie’s hospital friends. They were so supportive in the story and written extremely well. Since they were all seeking treatment for different things and came to the Home at different ages, their interactions provided a lot of wisdom and empathy as they interacted with each other.
The romance took a back seat to Ellie’s character growth, and I think that was the right choice for this story. This story is very much Ellie’s and I loved watching her discover that it’s ok to lean on others.
This book made me very thankful for the dependable friends in my own life, because genuine friendship through good days and really bad ones is such a blessing.
Thank you to Wednesday Books for the eARC. All thoughts are my own.
.
I loved how much time we spent with Ellie’s hospital friends. They were so supportive in the story and written extremely well. Since they were all seeking treatment for different things and came to the Home at different ages, their interactions provided a lot of wisdom and empathy as they interacted with each other.
The romance took a back seat to Ellie’s character growth, and I think that was the right choice for this story. This story is very much Ellie’s and I loved watching her discover that it’s ok to lean on others.
This book made me very thankful for the dependable friends in my own life, because genuine friendship through good days and really bad ones is such a blessing.
Thank you to Wednesday Books for the eARC. All thoughts are my own.
March 5, 2024
4.5 stars
I love the fact that we're starting to see more books on the market that contain main characters with a disability. Ellie is one such character. She's honest, perhaps too much so at times, and totally relatable and realistic! Her struggles with her chronic condition and educational and inspirational. Then when you throw in the usual teen dramas with friends, school, and parents, you have a must-read book! I love how Ellie doesn't sugarcoat anything. She doesn't try to convince everyone that everything is sunshine and roses ... and that's totally spot-on, especially when you live with a chronic illness. The supporting characters are also well crafted and, along with Ellie, have great development. Ellie has a great group of friends that help her, and each other, navigate the challenges of life, particularly when they involve hospital stays. I wasn't familiar with VATERs syndrome prior to this book, so I appreciated learning more about this rare disability, and the author's personal experience adds another layer of credibility to the story. This book will stick with me, and I look forward to reading more from Schreiber!
Disclaimer: I received a complimentary copy, but I wasn't required to leave a positive review.
I love the fact that we're starting to see more books on the market that contain main characters with a disability. Ellie is one such character. She's honest, perhaps too much so at times, and totally relatable and realistic! Her struggles with her chronic condition and educational and inspirational. Then when you throw in the usual teen dramas with friends, school, and parents, you have a must-read book! I love how Ellie doesn't sugarcoat anything. She doesn't try to convince everyone that everything is sunshine and roses ... and that's totally spot-on, especially when you live with a chronic illness. The supporting characters are also well crafted and, along with Ellie, have great development. Ellie has a great group of friends that help her, and each other, navigate the challenges of life, particularly when they involve hospital stays. I wasn't familiar with VATERs syndrome prior to this book, so I appreciated learning more about this rare disability, and the author's personal experience adds another layer of credibility to the story. This book will stick with me, and I look forward to reading more from Schreiber!
Disclaimer: I received a complimentary copy, but I wasn't required to leave a positive review.
January 29, 2024
Ellie Haycock has her “sick” friends and her “normal” friends and she is unwilling to let her two worlds collide. As someone who is medically fragile, she doesn’t want her friends from home to treat her differently if they knew about her life in and out of hospitals and the Home (read Ronald McDonald house). Her mother has already almost ruined it for her before with her online blog detailing her medical history. That oversharing is a whole other world annoyance in her life.
When a new cough racks her already weak lungs, she is forced to see the doctors again to figure out what is wrong. This stay is different. Besides her hospital bestie Caitlin (who also has VATER Syndrome), she meets two other patients with life threatening illnesses and a volunteer, and Team Tumor begins to make Ellie question everything she thought she understood. They work to convince her that her friends from her high school will still like her if she gives them more details about her diagnoses and surgical procedures, and that compartmentalizing isn’t helping her cope. More importantly, they help her to feel brave enough to confront her mom about her blog. As she has gotten older it is has become more invasive than her surgeries. All Ellie wants is a little autonomy over her own body when it comes to her parents and her doctor’s medical plan.
Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal is definitely geared toward a teen audience. As an adult, I found her whiny at times and ungrateful towards her friends and family, but she is a teen and she is learning to navigate the world with tougher circumstances than the average kiddo. I am sure there isn’t enough medical focused stories in the YA genre, so I applaud the author for contributing and giving us a character who is perhaps fragile in body, but certainly strong in mind.
Thank you to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and of course the author Gretchen Schreiber for the advanced copy of the book. Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal is out on March 5th. All opinions are my own.
Http://www.instagram.com/passionforprose
When a new cough racks her already weak lungs, she is forced to see the doctors again to figure out what is wrong. This stay is different. Besides her hospital bestie Caitlin (who also has VATER Syndrome), she meets two other patients with life threatening illnesses and a volunteer, and Team Tumor begins to make Ellie question everything she thought she understood. They work to convince her that her friends from her high school will still like her if she gives them more details about her diagnoses and surgical procedures, and that compartmentalizing isn’t helping her cope. More importantly, they help her to feel brave enough to confront her mom about her blog. As she has gotten older it is has become more invasive than her surgeries. All Ellie wants is a little autonomy over her own body when it comes to her parents and her doctor’s medical plan.
Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal is definitely geared toward a teen audience. As an adult, I found her whiny at times and ungrateful towards her friends and family, but she is a teen and she is learning to navigate the world with tougher circumstances than the average kiddo. I am sure there isn’t enough medical focused stories in the YA genre, so I applaud the author for contributing and giving us a character who is perhaps fragile in body, but certainly strong in mind.
Thank you to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and of course the author Gretchen Schreiber for the advanced copy of the book. Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal is out on March 5th. All opinions are my own.
Http://www.instagram.com/passionforprose
August 9, 2024
Finally, a book with chronically ill characters. That's realistic. And clean. (Except for some language, but for once, I'm willing to put that aside.)
I wish 16-year-old Anna could have read this book. But even now, the spoonie in me is satisfied. Because it finally made me feel seen.
I wish 16-year-old Anna could have read this book. But even now, the spoonie in me is satisfied. Because it finally made me feel seen.
July 7, 2025
4.5 ⭐
Czuje się autentyczność tych uczuć i emocji. Niezwykle ciekawa narracja i złożone, niejednoznaczne relacje.
Uwielbiam, gdy książka poszerza horyzonty czy uwrażliwia - ta zrobiła i jedno i drugie.
Czuje się autentyczność tych uczuć i emocji. Niezwykle ciekawa narracja i złożone, niejednoznaczne relacje.
Uwielbiam, gdy książka poszerza horyzonty czy uwrażliwia - ta zrobiła i jedno i drugie.
February 14, 2024
As an able bodied individual, I never had to think twice about trusting doctors— I’ve never even broken a bone before. Ellie is a smart young woman dealing with a difficult hand in life and who is learning how to trust, open up to and lean on others.
Things I loved: ❤️
The portrayal of strong friendships, especially strong female friendships. Everyone needs a Brooke and a Caitlin in their lives. Everyone needs their own Tumor Squad. Not everyone is that lucky.
Ellie’s romance with Ryan felt like more of a secondary storyline— the focus of the plot was definitely on Ellie’s personal growth and her relationships with her friends and family. I really loved this, especially for a YA book.
A look into the lives of families caring for high needs individuals. Lots of sacrifices are involved, but there is also so much love. I like how the author showed both the good and the bad and didn’t try to hide the reality of the toll everyday life takes on the caregivers.
The diverse representation of individuals living with visible and invisible illnesses and afflictions. They are people too, they deserve to take up space and they deserve to have their stories heard.
Things I didn’t love: 💔
It took a minute for me to get into the book. Ellie is somewhat of a prickly teen who thinks she knows it all (aka every teen to have ever existed). At times, this made it a little difficult to be in her head. However, the fact that Ellie is so unapologetic and unfiltered ultimately made her story that much more emotionally compelling. Although I didn’t love the pacing in the first 25% of the book, it’s worth pushing through. By the end, I was 1000% invested and rooting for Ellie and the Tumor Squad.
Jack’s character felt flat to me. I also would’ve liked to see a little bit more of Ellie’s life outside the hospital.
Thank you to Goodreads and St. Martin’s Press for an ARC of this book!
Things I loved: ❤️
The portrayal of strong friendships, especially strong female friendships. Everyone needs a Brooke and a Caitlin in their lives. Everyone needs their own Tumor Squad. Not everyone is that lucky.
Ellie’s romance with Ryan felt like more of a secondary storyline— the focus of the plot was definitely on Ellie’s personal growth and her relationships with her friends and family. I really loved this, especially for a YA book.
A look into the lives of families caring for high needs individuals. Lots of sacrifices are involved, but there is also so much love. I like how the author showed both the good and the bad and didn’t try to hide the reality of the toll everyday life takes on the caregivers.
The diverse representation of individuals living with visible and invisible illnesses and afflictions. They are people too, they deserve to take up space and they deserve to have their stories heard.
Things I didn’t love: 💔
It took a minute for me to get into the book. Ellie is somewhat of a prickly teen who thinks she knows it all (aka every teen to have ever existed). At times, this made it a little difficult to be in her head. However, the fact that Ellie is so unapologetic and unfiltered ultimately made her story that much more emotionally compelling. Although I didn’t love the pacing in the first 25% of the book, it’s worth pushing through. By the end, I was 1000% invested and rooting for Ellie and the Tumor Squad.
Jack’s character felt flat to me. I also would’ve liked to see a little bit more of Ellie’s life outside the hospital.
Thank you to Goodreads and St. Martin’s Press for an ARC of this book!
March 5, 2024
As someone who spent their high school and adult years in and out of hospitals, plus being the mom of a son with special needs who also is in and out of hospitals quite frequently, I honestly thought this book would be a shoe-in for me. Unfortunately, that was not the case.
A few of the issues that I personally had was that the situation with Ellie was not believable. Someone her age who has had over 40 surgeries, which would average over 3 a year since birth, would simply not be able to attend public school and be able to keep an illness such as hers a secret from anyone. Her attitude towards anyone who wasn't her was callous and she always assumed the worst in people without even giving them a chance to understand or support her. This in combination with her self-centered attitudes towards her mom and her hospital friends made her a not very likeable person.
Even though this novel was not for me, I do greatly appreciate more novels for young adults with disability visibility for others to learn and understand what life can be like for those of us who have to split our time between hospital life and not-hospital life. I actually identified the most with Ellie's mom, not because I blog about mine or my son's medical conditions, but because I understood her lonliness and the need for a support system. I have had friends who have decided my medical issues are too much for them and I have had friends who have stood by me every step of the way, but the only people who truly truly understand what you are going through are those who are going through it themselves and medical communities and support groups are essential for moms with kids with special needs.
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for an advanced reader's copy in exchange for an honest review.
A few of the issues that I personally had was that the situation with Ellie was not believable. Someone her age who has had over 40 surgeries, which would average over 3 a year since birth, would simply not be able to attend public school and be able to keep an illness such as hers a secret from anyone. Her attitude towards anyone who wasn't her was callous and she always assumed the worst in people without even giving them a chance to understand or support her. This in combination with her self-centered attitudes towards her mom and her hospital friends made her a not very likeable person.
Even though this novel was not for me, I do greatly appreciate more novels for young adults with disability visibility for others to learn and understand what life can be like for those of us who have to split our time between hospital life and not-hospital life. I actually identified the most with Ellie's mom, not because I blog about mine or my son's medical conditions, but because I understood her lonliness and the need for a support system. I have had friends who have decided my medical issues are too much for them and I have had friends who have stood by me every step of the way, but the only people who truly truly understand what you are going through are those who are going through it themselves and medical communities and support groups are essential for moms with kids with special needs.
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for an advanced reader's copy in exchange for an honest review.
December 4, 2024
I was attracted to Ellie Haycock is Totally Normal for three reasons. First, the cover. Second, the idea of having to live two separate lives. Third, Natalie Naudus narrates the audiobook. Result, a new favorite read of 2024 that felt very personal in some aspects, with the realities of being disabled, both good and bad, with a coming of age tale with friendship and romance all into one.
For her whole life, Eleanor Haycock has been splitting between her “normal” life and her hospital life, and it’s worse when her whole life and medical history with VACTERLs has been blogged by her mother, while having good intentions, has crossed some lines as of late, especially when she just wants to fit in. Most of the story takes place during another one of Ellie’s hospital stays, this time for lung issues. Though it’s not long before her two lives collide.
Especially to those that are disabled, this book is very relatable, mostly to Ellie’s challenges of trying to be as “normal” as possible, but knowing that she’ll stick out in the crowd, and the frustration that your life isn’t truly your own in more than one aspect. The coming of age aspects deal with trying to grow your own advocacy and autonomy, when many times, disabled people are denied this. I especially loved when Ellie aired out her frustrations about constant hospital stays and being treated like a project by the rest of the world. Other aspects of Ellie’s character that I liked was that she built up this stubbornness through years of hospital trips and she’s not immune to learning some valuable life lessons herself about life balance.
While there is a romance arc and rivals to lovers, there’s a just about equal focus on Ellie’s friends, both in and out of the hospital, and they were done well. Each of them had their own mini arc and I enjoyed learning about each of them and they weren’t just there for inspiration for the “normal” audience. I also like how Ellie’s parents are humanized as instead of these evil parents that don’t care for her. They are doing what they feel is best, but of course, they have to learn things too and mend the parent-child relationship, which can be so complex in these situations, so I appreciate that.
The prose was easy to follow along and Naudus nails the range of emotions, especially when Ellie is upset. I also enjoyed her narration during the blog posts, with a more mature voice. There is talk of medical terminology and procedures, but it’s nothing graphic.
If you’re up for the less pretty parts of living with disabilities, this is a must read for anyone.
*I received an ARC from Netgalley and Macmillan Audio. All opinions are my own.*
For her whole life, Eleanor Haycock has been splitting between her “normal” life and her hospital life, and it’s worse when her whole life and medical history with VACTERLs has been blogged by her mother, while having good intentions, has crossed some lines as of late, especially when she just wants to fit in. Most of the story takes place during another one of Ellie’s hospital stays, this time for lung issues. Though it’s not long before her two lives collide.
Especially to those that are disabled, this book is very relatable, mostly to Ellie’s challenges of trying to be as “normal” as possible, but knowing that she’ll stick out in the crowd, and the frustration that your life isn’t truly your own in more than one aspect. The coming of age aspects deal with trying to grow your own advocacy and autonomy, when many times, disabled people are denied this. I especially loved when Ellie aired out her frustrations about constant hospital stays and being treated like a project by the rest of the world. Other aspects of Ellie’s character that I liked was that she built up this stubbornness through years of hospital trips and she’s not immune to learning some valuable life lessons herself about life balance.
While there is a romance arc and rivals to lovers, there’s a just about equal focus on Ellie’s friends, both in and out of the hospital, and they were done well. Each of them had their own mini arc and I enjoyed learning about each of them and they weren’t just there for inspiration for the “normal” audience. I also like how Ellie’s parents are humanized as instead of these evil parents that don’t care for her. They are doing what they feel is best, but of course, they have to learn things too and mend the parent-child relationship, which can be so complex in these situations, so I appreciate that.
The prose was easy to follow along and Naudus nails the range of emotions, especially when Ellie is upset. I also enjoyed her narration during the blog posts, with a more mature voice. There is talk of medical terminology and procedures, but it’s nothing graphic.
If you’re up for the less pretty parts of living with disabilities, this is a must read for anyone.
*I received an ARC from Netgalley and Macmillan Audio. All opinions are my own.*
November 20, 2023
16 year old Ellie Haycock has done her best to keep her life compartmentalized, never crossing home life with hospital life. High school Ellie is part of the speech/debate team. She has her best friend and boyfriend and that part is the “normal” and comfortable side. While Hospital Ellie deals with a mysterious illness called VATERLs. In and out of the hospital since she was born, innumerable amounts of surgery and tests, while her mom won’t stop documenting this all for her blog “𝖵𝖠𝖳𝖤𝖱𝗌 𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝖶𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗋”. As another hospital visits brings her back to the hospital “Home”, she builds a friendship with other patients and her view on things start to shift. Also doesn’t hurt that there’s someone in her corner that is cute and she can’t stop thinking about.
𝖤𝗅𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖨𝗌 𝖳𝗈𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝖭𝗈𝗋𝗆𝖺𝗅 is based off Gretchen Schreiber’s own medical experience with the same condition. Through Ellie’s character Schreiber has given a voice to all the 16 year olds who are dealing with their own illnesses, whether visible or not. This book will stay with me forever because this isn’t just a YA novel, it’s a reminder that not everyone is against you, not everyone will ignore you and tell you it’s “all in your head” and not every medical professional will dismiss you. It’s a reminder that it’s ok to want to be ordinary even though you are actually extraordinary. It’s a reminder that if you feel that something isn’t right, advocate for yourself.
This book is such an empowerment to the disability and chronic illness community. So Gretchen, from one chronic illness warrior to another, thank you ♥️
𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾：
✩𝖥𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽 𝖿𝖺𝗆𝗂𝗅𝗒
✩𝖤𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌
✩𝖣𝗂𝗌𝖺𝖻𝗂𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗒 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗁𝗋𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝗂𝗅𝗅𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗉
✩𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖡𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄𝖿𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝖢𝗅𝗎𝖻 𝗆𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝖥𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝖥𝖾𝖾𝗍 𝖠𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍
✵𝖬𝖺𝗇𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖭𝖾𝗍𝗀𝖺𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗒, 𝖲𝗍. 𝖬𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗂𝗇’𝗌 𝖯𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌 & 𝖦𝗋𝖾𝗍𝖼𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝖲𝖼𝗁𝗋𝖾𝗂𝖻𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗀𝗂𝖿𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖠𝖽𝗏𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾𝖽 𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋’𝗌 𝖢𝗈𝗉𝗒 𝗂𝗇 𝖾𝗑𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝗈𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗏𝗂𝖾𝗐．✵
𝖤𝗅𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖨𝗌 𝖳𝗈𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝖭𝗈𝗋𝗆𝖺𝗅 is based off Gretchen Schreiber’s own medical experience with the same condition. Through Ellie’s character Schreiber has given a voice to all the 16 year olds who are dealing with their own illnesses, whether visible or not. This book will stay with me forever because this isn’t just a YA novel, it’s a reminder that not everyone is against you, not everyone will ignore you and tell you it’s “all in your head” and not every medical professional will dismiss you. It’s a reminder that it’s ok to want to be ordinary even though you are actually extraordinary. It’s a reminder that if you feel that something isn’t right, advocate for yourself.
This book is such an empowerment to the disability and chronic illness community. So Gretchen, from one chronic illness warrior to another, thank you ♥️
𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾：
✩𝖥𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽 𝖿𝖺𝗆𝗂𝗅𝗒
✩𝖤𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌
✩𝖣𝗂𝗌𝖺𝖻𝗂𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗒 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗁𝗋𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝗂𝗅𝗅𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗉
✩𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖡𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄𝖿𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝖢𝗅𝗎𝖻 𝗆𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝖥𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝖥𝖾𝖾𝗍 𝖠𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍
✵𝖬𝖺𝗇𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖭𝖾𝗍𝗀𝖺𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗒, 𝖲𝗍. 𝖬𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗂𝗇’𝗌 𝖯𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌 & 𝖦𝗋𝖾𝗍𝖼𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝖲𝖼𝗁𝗋𝖾𝗂𝖻𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗀𝗂𝖿𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖠𝖽𝗏𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾𝖽 𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋’𝗌 𝖢𝗈𝗉𝗒 𝗂𝗇 𝖾𝗑𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝗈𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗏𝗂𝖾𝗐．✵
February 14, 2024
The Breakfast Club meets Five Feet Apart in this big-hearted novel from debut author Gretchen Schreiber.
Thank you Wednesday Books, Macmillan Audio & Netgalley for sending me a review copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. I was reading this book and I decided to DNF it at 63%. This book is written from the perspective of Ellie Haycock and I don’t like her. I don’t want to spend any more time inside her head.
Thank you Wednesday Books, Macmillan Audio & Netgalley for sending me a review copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. I was reading this book and I decided to DNF it at 63%. This book is written from the perspective of Ellie Haycock and I don’t like her. I don’t want to spend any more time inside her head.
August 14, 2023
A poignant novel about a rare disability, VATER syndrome, that requires frequent hospitalizations for MC Ellie Haycock. She learns to separate her real life friends from her hospital friends while her Mom blogs publicly about her illness. Written with great heart by the author, who has the same syndrome.
December 2, 2023
This was hard for me to connect to being a person how’s never felt with a serious illness. I think as a reader the MC comes across super bitter and rude and just wasn’t enjoyable to read. I also thought the mom and her blog was such a cringy thing. Again this one just wasn’t for me.
October 27, 2023
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press Wednesday Books for this advanced reader copy. The opinions expressed are mine alone.
My Summary
Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal by Gretchen Schreiber is just my kind of book: the main character(s) have some sort of medical condition/ chronic illness/ disability and yet it touches on everyday stuff like friendship, love, self esteem, family dynamics etc. in Ellie Haycock is totally normal we meet Ellie, a high schooler with a rare genetic condition that affects both her physical appearance and her internal organs. Her mom runs a blog that has chronicled Ellie’s life from the very beginning. it serves as a way for her to connect with others and raise money to support and raise awareness about the things families experience when raising a child with a disability. This is a huge source of frustration and hurt for Ellie though (more on that later). The reader quickly learns that Ellie is experiencing persistent breathing issues that her local doctor can’t figure out. Therefore she and her mom are going to see a specialist and stay at “The Home” (essentially a Ronald McDonald House) for a bit. The reader also learns that Ellie is very deliberate in keeping her “hospital life” and “life-life” separate. She has hospital friends and non-hospital friends and they don’t know anything about each other.
The majority of the book features her hospital best friend Caitlin as well as a few other teens with varying medical conditions staying at “The Home”. Each teen has their own way of looking at/ dealing with their situation and it’s interesting to notice the differences. In particular, Ryan is a newbie to the whole hospital life thing and has total faith that his doctors will figure out what’s causing his mysterious symptoms. This is the complete opposite of Ellie’s perspective. She knows all too well that doctors don’t know everything and especially doesn’t trust her newest specialist. She is also used to her mom running the show when it comes to talking to the doctors and making decisions for her (again, chronicling everything on the blog). Undeterred by Ellie’s negative attitude towards the healthcare system, Ryan offers to be her “Medical coach” and a friendship is formed. He encourages her to be more involved when talking with the specialist about the plan he’s suggesting. But, the coaching thing isn’t one sided: Ryan soon realizes that Ellie can provide insight into what it’s like being a professional patient.
As Ellie and Ryan’s friendship deepens she wonders whether keeping her two lives separate is best after all. To complicate things, Caitlin is generally very open about her own feelings and experiences by maintaining a social media presence of her own. All of this leads to friction within the friend group and a lot of self reflection on Ellie’s part.
Going back to the Mom’s blog: throughout the book we see examples of the posts and get a glimpse into her perspective of a mom on a mission to find answers but also come to terms with the social emotional side of raising a child with health issues.
My Reflections
I really like that the author was deliberate in making this a medical-focused story with typical teen issues thrown in. As she mentions in the beginning, finding books like this is rare. While reading this one, I’ll admit I had difficulty relating to Ellie because of how strongly she felt about not sharing her medical side with her non-hospital friends. I don’t have that “luxury”- I’m much more like Caitlin’s character in that respect. But, I can empathize with Ellie and understand why she feels the way she does especially given the fact that she feels like the whole world knows everything about her because of the Mom’s blog. When I was born, the internet wasn’t really a thing. Therefore my mom didn’t have the opportunity to blog and share our experience via social media like many parents do today. If she did, maybe I’d feel more like Ellie who simply wants to be able to control the narrative of her life.
Like I said earlier, the book explores your typical teen issues of friendships, relationships, and growing up but it also highlights other non-typical stuff:
Learning how to be an involved member of your medical team
The balancing act of knowing what, when, and how much to share online
The affect that how a parent views their child’s condition impacts their child’s perception of themselves and the world
The toll on parents and some of the hard choices they must make when raising a child like Ellie
All in all, I think this is a very good glimpse into this often hidden world. While similar to The Fault in Our Stars (one of my top favorites) or Five Feet Apart, this book honestly goes deeper. I think it’s a realistic illustration of what it’s like being a teen like Ellie and navigating the road to adulthood. Perhaps this next point is going a little to the extreme but I also think it serves as a warning for parents nowadays about the impact of “oversharing” your child’s story online. Eventually that child is going to grow up and may or may not want certain details online. They may choose to keep things private or they may become the next big social media influencer. The key is they have a choice. Therefore, I could see this as being a great option for both teens and parents to read and then discuss together.
My Summary
Ellie Haycock Is Totally Normal by Gretchen Schreiber is just my kind of book: the main character(s) have some sort of medical condition/ chronic illness/ disability and yet it touches on everyday stuff like friendship, love, self esteem, family dynamics etc. in Ellie Haycock is totally normal we meet Ellie, a high schooler with a rare genetic condition that affects both her physical appearance and her internal organs. Her mom runs a blog that has chronicled Ellie’s life from the very beginning. it serves as a way for her to connect with others and raise money to support and raise awareness about the things families experience when raising a child with a disability. This is a huge source of frustration and hurt for Ellie though (more on that later). The reader quickly learns that Ellie is experiencing persistent breathing issues that her local doctor can’t figure out. Therefore she and her mom are going to see a specialist and stay at “The Home” (essentially a Ronald McDonald House) for a bit. The reader also learns that Ellie is very deliberate in keeping her “hospital life” and “life-life” separate. She has hospital friends and non-hospital friends and they don’t know anything about each other.
The majority of the book features her hospital best friend Caitlin as well as a few other teens with varying medical conditions staying at “The Home”. Each teen has their own way of looking at/ dealing with their situation and it’s interesting to notice the differences. In particular, Ryan is a newbie to the whole hospital life thing and has total faith that his doctors will figure out what’s causing his mysterious symptoms. This is the complete opposite of Ellie’s perspective. She knows all too well that doctors don’t know everything and especially doesn’t trust her newest specialist. She is also used to her mom running the show when it comes to talking to the doctors and making decisions for her (again, chronicling everything on the blog). Undeterred by Ellie’s negative attitude towards the healthcare system, Ryan offers to be her “Medical coach” and a friendship is formed. He encourages her to be more involved when talking with the specialist about the plan he’s suggesting. But, the coaching thing isn’t one sided: Ryan soon realizes that Ellie can provide insight into what it’s like being a professional patient.
As Ellie and Ryan’s friendship deepens she wonders whether keeping her two lives separate is best after all. To complicate things, Caitlin is generally very open about her own feelings and experiences by maintaining a social media presence of her own. All of this leads to friction within the friend group and a lot of self reflection on Ellie’s part.
Going back to the Mom’s blog: throughout the book we see examples of the posts and get a glimpse into her perspective of a mom on a mission to find answers but also come to terms with the social emotional side of raising a child with health issues.
My Reflections
I really like that the author was deliberate in making this a medical-focused story with typical teen issues thrown in. As she mentions in the beginning, finding books like this is rare. While reading this one, I’ll admit I had difficulty relating to Ellie because of how strongly she felt about not sharing her medical side with her non-hospital friends. I don’t have that “luxury”- I’m much more like Caitlin’s character in that respect. But, I can empathize with Ellie and understand why she feels the way she does especially given the fact that she feels like the whole world knows everything about her because of the Mom’s blog. When I was born, the internet wasn’t really a thing. Therefore my mom didn’t have the opportunity to blog and share our experience via social media like many parents do today. If she did, maybe I’d feel more like Ellie who simply wants to be able to control the narrative of her life.
Like I said earlier, the book explores your typical teen issues of friendships, relationships, and growing up but it also highlights other non-typical stuff:
Learning how to be an involved member of your medical team
The balancing act of knowing what, when, and how much to share online
The affect that how a parent views their child’s condition impacts their child’s perception of themselves and the world
The toll on parents and some of the hard choices they must make when raising a child like Ellie
All in all, I think this is a very good glimpse into this often hidden world. While similar to The Fault in Our Stars (one of my top favorites) or Five Feet Apart, this book honestly goes deeper. I think it’s a realistic illustration of what it’s like being a teen like Ellie and navigating the road to adulthood. Perhaps this next point is going a little to the extreme but I also think it serves as a warning for parents nowadays about the impact of “oversharing” your child’s story online. Eventually that child is going to grow up and may or may not want certain details online. They may choose to keep things private or they may become the next big social media influencer. The key is they have a choice. Therefore, I could see this as being a great option for both teens and parents to read and then discuss together.
August 17, 2024
Ellie is whiny and self-centered and I’m 25 pages in and understand nothing about her “condition”. Pass.
February 29, 2024
What’s it about?
Ellie has two lives: one “normal” life in school, and her “hospital” life when she’s staying at a home near a hospital undergoing diagnoses and treatments for VATER syndrome. She doesn’t ever want her two lives to collide. And then her mom has a viral blog where she documents every single part of Ellie’s life–and Ellie has come to resent her for it.
And now Ellie is sick again and her frustration with doctors and fear of surgery and needles means she’s angry and resisting surgery. Her hospital friends try to convince Ellie to not hate all doctors, go on an adventure, and be open to sharing her hospital life with her “normal” life.
Along the way she makes some amazing hospital friends and even sparks a romance with Ryan, who is firmly “team doctor” and has an autoimmune disease.
My thoughts:
I knew, as soon as I heard the author’s note, that this book was going to be difficult for me to get through. I’m the parent of a chronically ill child who went through more than a year of “we don’t know what’s going on” before settling on a working diagnosis with multiple surgeries and countless tests and hospital visits. And while Ellie’s illness is far worse than my son’s and what he’s endured, many points of this novel hit me in some real and painful places.
At one point in the story, Ellie’s “medical coach” and friend, Ryan, talks about his friend’s girlfriend who has the same illness my son has. It literally stopped me in my tracks while I was walking.
A lot of readers were irritated and frustrated with Ellie’s mom and her blog in this book. And while I empathize with Ellie and her frustration, I related so much to the mother. How could I not? That being said, I was still very frustrated with both Ellie and her mom throughout the book. Their lack of communication and coping mechanisms were tough to read.
I think this book has great insight into what it’s like to live with chronic illness–both as patient and caretaker, and I do think it will hit differently with those who have had some of these experiences. Personally, it made me open my eyes to my child’s thoughts on his own care, and even laugh a little at how, no matter the circumstances, teens experience so many of the same feelings.
Ellie has two lives: one “normal” life in school, and her “hospital” life when she’s staying at a home near a hospital undergoing diagnoses and treatments for VATER syndrome. She doesn’t ever want her two lives to collide. And then her mom has a viral blog where she documents every single part of Ellie’s life–and Ellie has come to resent her for it.
And now Ellie is sick again and her frustration with doctors and fear of surgery and needles means she’s angry and resisting surgery. Her hospital friends try to convince Ellie to not hate all doctors, go on an adventure, and be open to sharing her hospital life with her “normal” life.
Along the way she makes some amazing hospital friends and even sparks a romance with Ryan, who is firmly “team doctor” and has an autoimmune disease.
My thoughts:
I knew, as soon as I heard the author’s note, that this book was going to be difficult for me to get through. I’m the parent of a chronically ill child who went through more than a year of “we don’t know what’s going on” before settling on a working diagnosis with multiple surgeries and countless tests and hospital visits. And while Ellie’s illness is far worse than my son’s and what he’s endured, many points of this novel hit me in some real and painful places.
At one point in the story, Ellie’s “medical coach” and friend, Ryan, talks about his friend’s girlfriend who has the same illness my son has. It literally stopped me in my tracks while I was walking.
A lot of readers were irritated and frustrated with Ellie’s mom and her blog in this book. And while I empathize with Ellie and her frustration, I related so much to the mother. How could I not? That being said, I was still very frustrated with both Ellie and her mom throughout the book. Their lack of communication and coping mechanisms were tough to read.
I think this book has great insight into what it’s like to live with chronic illness–both as patient and caretaker, and I do think it will hit differently with those who have had some of these experiences. Personally, it made me open my eyes to my child’s thoughts on his own care, and even laugh a little at how, no matter the circumstances, teens experience so many of the same feelings.
February 12, 2024
Ellie has had surgeries since forever and while she can't hide her appearance, she can still hide from her friends how bad things still are and all her life during the yearly periods she must stay away for her treatment. Thus, she keeps her life-life friends in one box and her hospital-friends in another. That's until her boyfriend comes for a surprise visit at the family home and finds out she's having another surgery without having told him. Suddenly, she sees that letting those walls fall and people help might be the way to get him back.
There's a lot to talk about this book, but one thing that never sat well was how half of it seemed to be preaching at me. I wasn't a fan of the tone, and Ellie was already a hard one to like without it. However, from what i could find out about the author, it comes from someone with experience in what Ellie is going through, so there is a lot to learn from Ellie's story too, lots of food for discussion if you're doing a group read. However, it also means the book feels a little like an autobiography, in a way that Ellie's voice mixed with the author's, and I wasn't sure if someone like Ellie would really be saying some of those things. Like there were two Ellies, and while one had a lot to say, one was just insufferable.
And she needed to be for her character's arc. I get that. And yet, I didn't like it.
The writing isn't very stable, as you can imagine from above. It's still a pleasant read—as it can be considering the theme. It's not sick-girl literature! Our main character happens to have health issues, she happens to be treating them, but this isn't about her being sick, but about her wanting to lead a normal life despite all the adversities. Ultimately, it's a coming of age with a romance on the side.
I'd say this was lukewarm, but it's a nice story and it raises great points, so I don't regret one bit picking it up.
Honest review based on an ARC provided by Netgalley. Many thanks to the publisher for this opportunity.
There's a lot to talk about this book, but one thing that never sat well was how half of it seemed to be preaching at me. I wasn't a fan of the tone, and Ellie was already a hard one to like without it. However, from what i could find out about the author, it comes from someone with experience in what Ellie is going through, so there is a lot to learn from Ellie's story too, lots of food for discussion if you're doing a group read. However, it also means the book feels a little like an autobiography, in a way that Ellie's voice mixed with the author's, and I wasn't sure if someone like Ellie would really be saying some of those things. Like there were two Ellies, and while one had a lot to say, one was just insufferable.
And she needed to be for her character's arc. I get that. And yet, I didn't like it.
The writing isn't very stable, as you can imagine from above. It's still a pleasant read—as it can be considering the theme. It's not sick-girl literature! Our main character happens to have health issues, she happens to be treating them, but this isn't about her being sick, but about her wanting to lead a normal life despite all the adversities. Ultimately, it's a coming of age with a romance on the side.
I'd say this was lukewarm, but it's a nice story and it raises great points, so I don't regret one bit picking it up.
Honest review based on an ARC provided by Netgalley. Many thanks to the publisher for this opportunity.
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