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Special Grace: Prayers and Reflections for Families with Special Needs
The world of special needs is filled with in the United States, about 17 percent of children have a diagnosed developmental disability, and 14 percent of public school students receive special education services. But behind these statistics are stories―stories of children struggling to fit into a world that wasn't designed for them, and stories of parents giving everything they have to advocate for their children. Most of these parents didn't choose this path; they were thrust upon it unknowing, unprepared, and often overwhelmed. They may struggle to talk about their experiences in relatable ways with family, friends, and even God. Special Grace is a collection of 127 prayers for all aspects of life for families with special needs. Here are prayers for family life, school, and church; prayers for an initial diagnosis, for the first day of school, and for celebrating a milestone. Each section is set off by a reflective essay from Evans's own family life. Filled with humor and wisdom, these prayers and reflections will help families process their experiences together and offer them to God with hope and simple trust. In moments when the cries of your heart leave you speechless, Special Grace provides words you can bring before your Father in heaven.
128 pages, Paperback
Published April 12, 2022
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
April 11, 2022
I have to tell you: as a Mom of four adopted kids, this book provides a resting-place unlike any other. I feel seen. Heard. Understood. The tired nights, the desperate prayers, the loneliness. The prayers in this book give form and shape to my spiritual cries, to moments that I thought I was bearing alone: A Prayer for a Meltdown. A Prayer for Exhaustion. A Prayer for Never-Ending Mountains of Paperwork. A Prayer for Our Child's Employment.
The author's narratives resonated with my own as well, and touching on experiences within the church was a particular gift - one that I rarely hear reflected on. For those of us with kids who do things like, well, shoot across the church pew as if they were rocketing off the wall of a swimming pool (speaking from personal experience, haha), we need others who understand what it's like to need to be fed spiritually while feeding and caring for ones who make that a Very Difficult Task. And then, what its like to meet God in those Very Difficult Tasks themselves.
Thank you to the author for such a gorgeous book, and I hope that others find it as lovely and helpful as I have.
The author's narratives resonated with my own as well, and touching on experiences within the church was a particular gift - one that I rarely hear reflected on. For those of us with kids who do things like, well, shoot across the church pew as if they were rocketing off the wall of a swimming pool (speaking from personal experience, haha), we need others who understand what it's like to need to be fed spiritually while feeding and caring for ones who make that a Very Difficult Task. And then, what its like to meet God in those Very Difficult Tasks themselves.
Thank you to the author for such a gorgeous book, and I hope that others find it as lovely and helpful as I have.
April 12, 2022
I'm not an objective reviewer, because I've worked with Elrena and think she's a terrific writer; I probably wouldn't have read this if her publisher hadn't sent me a copy. That said, I'm glad I read it. Even though I'm not raising children with diagnosed special needs, there are prayers and thanksgivings here that anyone could appreciate: for traveling; for driving; for respite care; for a setback; for a meltdown: we can all use a moment to reflect, to ask for help, to appreciate.
One of my favorite prayers, for a substitute teacher, begins, “Dear God, well, you know what’s coming and I know what’s coming but this dear teacher has no idea. Give our substitute teacher a good day, Lord.”
The prayers are interspersed with stories from Elrena's family, and she writes with warmth and love and great, dry humor. It's a challenging world and I like to think I'm pretty understanding of folks who have trouble navigating it, but I feel like reading this book has given me greater sensitivity and patience for anyone having a hard day out there.
One of my favorite prayers, for a substitute teacher, begins, “Dear God, well, you know what’s coming and I know what’s coming but this dear teacher has no idea. Give our substitute teacher a good day, Lord.”
The prayers are interspersed with stories from Elrena's family, and she writes with warmth and love and great, dry humor. It's a challenging world and I like to think I'm pretty understanding of folks who have trouble navigating it, but I feel like reading this book has given me greater sensitivity and patience for anyone having a hard day out there.
April 12, 2022
Elrena Evans is an attentive and realistic writer, documenting life with her family in all of its raw awkwardness. It is briskly structured with seven stories of family life that are at the same time warm and cringeworthy and redemptive.
Those chapters are each followed by a collection of original prayers that are striking in their brevity, in their specificity and in their frequent humor. These are prayers for Institutional Incompetence, for when people spiritualize disability, for when people look at us funny, when people say really dumb things. Other prayers offer thanksgiving for scientific discovery, for therapists and mental health professionals, for a new diagnosis, for safety during a medication change. Others offer thanks for an EpiPen, and for LEGO bricks.
Drawing from Elrena Evans’s life in the Anglican tradition, these prayers are concise, literarily brilliant and powerful in their impact. Readers unfamiliar with liturgical prayer should be pleasantly surprised at the emotional freight such prayers can carry and at their personal nature, and might be encouraged to write their own specific prayers.
Special Grace is a gift even for families whose children are in the “normal” part of the curve, giving insights into the struggles and offering helpful ideas of what to say and what not to say. Usually what not to say.
This is a brutally honest book, infused with the grace that only God can give, and which Evans shares freely with us.
Those chapters are each followed by a collection of original prayers that are striking in their brevity, in their specificity and in their frequent humor. These are prayers for Institutional Incompetence, for when people spiritualize disability, for when people look at us funny, when people say really dumb things. Other prayers offer thanksgiving for scientific discovery, for therapists and mental health professionals, for a new diagnosis, for safety during a medication change. Others offer thanks for an EpiPen, and for LEGO bricks.
Drawing from Elrena Evans’s life in the Anglican tradition, these prayers are concise, literarily brilliant and powerful in their impact. Readers unfamiliar with liturgical prayer should be pleasantly surprised at the emotional freight such prayers can carry and at their personal nature, and might be encouraged to write their own specific prayers.
Special Grace is a gift even for families whose children are in the “normal” part of the curve, giving insights into the struggles and offering helpful ideas of what to say and what not to say. Usually what not to say.
This is a brutally honest book, infused with the grace that only God can give, and which Evans shares freely with us.
August 18, 2022
The best part of this book to me were the reflections and not necessarily the prayers. I didn’t realize how much someone verbalizing life scenarios that were so familiar to me would be so comforting. If you have a child with high functioning ASD, you’ll find this book particularly helpful.
December 5, 2022
SPECIAL NEEDS CAREGIVERS: THIS IS THE BOOK FOR YOU!!!!
April 12, 2022
The title of this book says it all, we all need special grace, but for some of us, we need a whole lot more! And the beauty is, God gives those who need the extra grace as much as they need because as He says, “All are welcome!” Elrena shares with her readers the many day to day challenges that are faced with raising a child with special needs as well as the beautiful gifts that come with it. As someone who is not a parent or for that matter, a parent of a child with special needs, but is a teacher who welcomes these children into her heart as well as her classroom each year, I was truly honoured and blessed to read this book. Along with the stories, Elrena gives us words to pray for the endless experiences that come with raising a child with special needs. She gave me words to pray for the children, support staff, therapist, and family members of these children. How often to we find ourselves at the end of our rope with no words at all and yet, here is this book giving us just what we need. Special Grace also reminds me that you are not alone in raising your children and that all children just want to feel like they are welcomed and belong with all their “special needs”. This is a must have for anyone whose life is touched by children or families raising children with special needs. Thank you Elrena for sharing your stories and giving words to us when we have none!
April 12, 2022
“How do you pray for a child who is violent? What are the words?” This haunting question surfaces early in Elrena Evans’ remarkable new collection of essays and prayers about living with special needs. Many of us carry similar questions: How do you pray for a child who _________________? (has autism, just got a diagnosis, won’t ever take a first step… fill in your own blank.)
Throughout these poignant pages, Evans offers a range of prayers for just those moments. Drawing from the rich Anglican tradition of written prayer and her own hard-won wisdom as a parent of a child with special needs, Evans offers not just words that we may lack but a constant reminder that we are never far from God’s grace.
Even as she affirms the goodness of God, Evans resists superficial optimism and cheery—but ultimately false—clichés. Her transparency and honesty can inspire all of us to a deeper, more firmly rooted awareness of God’s presence with us.
This book is highly recommended for anyone who needs a measure of special grace in their lives (in other words, all of us.)
Throughout these poignant pages, Evans offers a range of prayers for just those moments. Drawing from the rich Anglican tradition of written prayer and her own hard-won wisdom as a parent of a child with special needs, Evans offers not just words that we may lack but a constant reminder that we are never far from God’s grace.
Even as she affirms the goodness of God, Evans resists superficial optimism and cheery—but ultimately false—clichés. Her transparency and honesty can inspire all of us to a deeper, more firmly rooted awareness of God’s presence with us.
This book is highly recommended for anyone who needs a measure of special grace in their lives (in other words, all of us.)
September 15, 2022
I purchased this because it essentially has a liturgy for an EpiPen. Clearly, this author understands a little of my life. She had me laughing out loud in the wee hours of the morning over her 'Can't Even" and "Time Change" prayers, but having to wait for the tears to clear when Harry Potter went to church. If I had enough money to buy a case of these and leave them in waiting rooms I would. As is, a nurse I encountered while my kid was in the hospital wrote the title down to purchase for her family member.
April 13, 2022
Though the personal essays in this book were certainly worth the read and held my attention, it's the prayers in the book that I will certainly re-read in the future. These prayers are for the exhausted, the frustrated, and the lonely parent (or teacher or grandparent or any adult working with families with special needs). The prayers provide encouragement and help. They provide the words when we're feeling like we don't know what to pray or how to pray it.
October 24, 2022
My favorite thing about this book is the authenticity with which the author shares her short vignettes and the honesty of her prayers. As a special needs mom of 2, I can relate in some way to all of her stories, but my favorite story in the book is the last one she tells. I think what will stay with me is the prayers over every single detail that pepper the book at the end of each chapter. It's a great place to start surrendering.
March 30, 2022
Such a touching book to help you navigate the journey raising a special needs child. The prayers were very helpful and I appreciated the author sharing her experiences. A blessing for all!
May 18, 2022
This book will be so beneficial for families and mothers who need to know they’re not alone. Loved this 💗
February 3, 2025
Encouraging and helpful.
I feel seen!
I especially like the multitude of various practical prayers!
Thank you to author Elrena Evans for this short but massively powerful book!
I feel seen!
I especially like the multitude of various practical prayers!
Thank you to author Elrena Evans for this short but massively powerful book!
May 3, 2022
I wish I'd had this book when my own family was going from crisis to crisis.
Elrena Evans's family stories are by turns difficult and reassuring, and the accompanying prayers supply ballast to help us ride the waves.
I hope Evans will keep writing because I'm sure there are so many stories to be told. About siblings whose parents are struggling to care well for everyone in the family. About her marriage, which surely has been affected by the demands and joys of caring for neurodiverse children. About her community: How did they come alongside her, and how did they not? And of course, about the son who is the center of the stories. How is he faring? What is he saying as he finds his own voice?
Most of all I hope readers will notice the mother alone with her son who plays Minecraft during worship services. I hope they will ask, How can I be with her there?
Elrena Evans's family stories are by turns difficult and reassuring, and the accompanying prayers supply ballast to help us ride the waves.
I hope Evans will keep writing because I'm sure there are so many stories to be told. About siblings whose parents are struggling to care well for everyone in the family. About her marriage, which surely has been affected by the demands and joys of caring for neurodiverse children. About her community: How did they come alongside her, and how did they not? And of course, about the son who is the center of the stories. How is he faring? What is he saying as he finds his own voice?
Most of all I hope readers will notice the mother alone with her son who plays Minecraft during worship services. I hope they will ask, How can I be with her there?
July 16, 2022
“Our son is going to get his ADHD assessment this week, finally.” I told Elrena this while we were working on the latest edition of Paper&String many months ago, and she immediately said, “Then I think you need to see this before it’s out in the world…” and sent me some sections from Special Grace, including A Prayer for A Diagnosis. I hadn’t even finished the first line before I’d teared up, it was exactly what I needed: to feel SEEN and understood. To know we weren’t the first, nor the last to go through this process.
As a member of her launch team, I was able to get an advanced copy of the whole book, and slowly made my way through the vulnerable and sometimes hilarious journey Elrena led us on in it, and sat with so many of the prayers that I could now say “yes, our family is here” for. Her words gave me words for things I couldn’t name myself. I found inclusion into this community as I recognized ways we too were navigating what her family was, even though the outcomes and diagnosis and severity may differ, the questions and fears were much the same. There is something freeing in the naming of things, giving shape to things that live in the dark in our minds, on the edges, that we can’t fight until we can see its form.
Months went by and I couldn't finish writing my review, and I didn't know why until I started my own journey of pursuing an ADHD diagnosis as an adult. Now that I, too, finally have my own diagnosis for ADHD, I can finally finish this review because I can explain how this book continues to minister to MY soul, as parent with ADHD AND a child with ADHD, and another child who we are on a journey to get a diagnosis for as well. How the grace of community is extended to any who fall under the vast spectrum of those who don’t measure up to what is considered “normal” in our society. That I now felt seen, understood, that hope and joy had been extended for us as our family starts navigating all the ways we will have to live with ADHD, treat parts of it where it’s possible, and learn how to better interact with each other and the world around us.
This book can walk us through joy, grief, acceptance, learning, and all the myriad responses to parts of life as a special needs family. Shame can’t survive in the light, and this book brings the shame we feel as parents or children who keep telling ourselves we SHOULD be able to do this or that, and instead tell us that we can only do so much, then we need to just rest and just accept and just learn grace. Special grace, given one day at a time. No easy answers, maybe no happy endings, sometimes no solutions, but always grace.
Those without special needs who want to better understand those in their communities who are, will find a glimpse into the ways that life for special needs families is both hard and beautiful. Entering into that story can develop grace towards those, for understanding the weight of effort on those families to live and move in their communities. Special Grace shows the ways that we special needs humans are another kind of “thin place” in this world where God is visible more fully to us AND through us, where glory can be seen if you stop to look with keen eyes and your whole soul. Where God’s grace for humanity is seen more fully.
As a member of her launch team, I was able to get an advanced copy of the whole book, and slowly made my way through the vulnerable and sometimes hilarious journey Elrena led us on in it, and sat with so many of the prayers that I could now say “yes, our family is here” for. Her words gave me words for things I couldn’t name myself. I found inclusion into this community as I recognized ways we too were navigating what her family was, even though the outcomes and diagnosis and severity may differ, the questions and fears were much the same. There is something freeing in the naming of things, giving shape to things that live in the dark in our minds, on the edges, that we can’t fight until we can see its form.
Months went by and I couldn't finish writing my review, and I didn't know why until I started my own journey of pursuing an ADHD diagnosis as an adult. Now that I, too, finally have my own diagnosis for ADHD, I can finally finish this review because I can explain how this book continues to minister to MY soul, as parent with ADHD AND a child with ADHD, and another child who we are on a journey to get a diagnosis for as well. How the grace of community is extended to any who fall under the vast spectrum of those who don’t measure up to what is considered “normal” in our society. That I now felt seen, understood, that hope and joy had been extended for us as our family starts navigating all the ways we will have to live with ADHD, treat parts of it where it’s possible, and learn how to better interact with each other and the world around us.
This book can walk us through joy, grief, acceptance, learning, and all the myriad responses to parts of life as a special needs family. Shame can’t survive in the light, and this book brings the shame we feel as parents or children who keep telling ourselves we SHOULD be able to do this or that, and instead tell us that we can only do so much, then we need to just rest and just accept and just learn grace. Special grace, given one day at a time. No easy answers, maybe no happy endings, sometimes no solutions, but always grace.
Those without special needs who want to better understand those in their communities who are, will find a glimpse into the ways that life for special needs families is both hard and beautiful. Entering into that story can develop grace towards those, for understanding the weight of effort on those families to live and move in their communities. Special Grace shows the ways that we special needs humans are another kind of “thin place” in this world where God is visible more fully to us AND through us, where glory can be seen if you stop to look with keen eyes and your whole soul. Where God’s grace for humanity is seen more fully.
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews