Unspeakable: Surviving My Childhood and Finding My Voice

by Jessica Willis Fisher

Using the written word as her witness statement, Jessica Willis Fisher gives a lacerating portrait of a girl finding her voice after years of being silenced and an unforgettable story of risk and faith.

Growing up the eldest daughter in a large, highly controlled, fundamentalist Christian household, Jessica Willis was groomed to perform, and to conform to her father's disturbing and chaotic teachings. Cut off from anything unapproved by her father, Jessica was persistently curious about the outside world, always wondering what was normal or potentially dangerous about her upbringing.

When the Willis family rocketed into fame after their appearances on multiple televised talent competitions in 2014, Jessica and her family landed their own reality TV show and toured across the globe, singing and dancing for millions. The world loved this beautiful family of kids; young and vivacious, the Willis's presented themselves to be extraordinary and happy. But the older and wiser Jessica got, the more she had to face that what was going on behind closed doors would forever be escalating.

In this elegant, harrowing story of the manipulation and codependency that defines abusive family relationships, Jessica Willis Fisher lets us see the formative moments of her childhood through her eyes. Fisher's haunting coming-of-age memoir captures the beauty and ugliness of a young woman finding her way—filled with longing, fear, confusion, secrecy, and most importantly, hope for the future.

Surviving My childhood and Finding My Voice shares:

An unflinching look at the manipulation and codependency that defines abusive family relationshipsThe formative moments of Jessica's childhood through her eyesAn unforgettable story of courage and strengthBeautifully written and monumental in its bravery, Fisher's story is proof that we can all become so much more that the things that happen to us.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Audiobook, Biography, Religion, Cults, Biography Memoir

352 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 2022

About the author

Jessica Willis Fisher is a singer/songwriter, performing artist, and author who believes that sharing our stories with one another will change the world. Growing up the eldest daughter in a toxic and abusive household, she performed with her family band The Willis Clan until her departure in 2016 at the age of 23. Her first book, Unspeakable, narrates her harrowing struggle to both articulate her childhood experiences and find her true voice on the other side of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. A passionate advocate for survivors, Jessica lives in Nashville, TN with her husband, Sean Fisher.

Reviews

[Tena · Rating 5 out of 5]

September 27th, 2015 my husband and I went to see the Willis Clan at the Harvester Performance Center in Rocky Mount, Virginia. My husband wasn't familiar with them but I was a big fan of the TV show. I liked their sound and was very excited to be able to see them. Before we went to the show we decided to stop at a local restaurant and eat. I was stunned to see the family, or most of them, eating there too. I did not go and interrupt their meal but my husband kept saying they look like they're upset. I thought maybe it was the weather because it was a rainy day. But as the dinner progressed I noticed that nobody met each other's eyes and they were very quiet, with little to no conversation. They had to have been aware that people knew who they were but there was literally no interaction with anyone else or each other. The show was wonderful! Great banter with the audience and perfect dancing and singing. My husband came away as a fan. We bought the shirts and the CDs and met most of the family. Brenda was working the merchandise table and I was thrilled to be able to meet her. But I noticed that she was very flat faced. Literally no emotion at all. She smiled and said the right things but her eyes were just kind of hollow. She was also very skinny. My husband made the comment that he didn't know how a woman who had had that many children managed to look that skinny. I thought maybe she was just tired. I was stunned when the news broke about the allegations against their father but looking back it was obvious something must not right with the family.
When I was given the opportunity to receive an advanced copy of Unspeakable I jumped at the chance. I was hoping that it would stop my imagination from going to dark places about what might have happened with the children. But I was wrong. The story is even worse than I think any of us could have imagined. How Jessica Willis Fisher lived through the trauma and managed to come out as a stronger person is beyond me.
My technical review of the book is it is very well written, informative, and educational. By that I mean there is so much information available for people who are going through trauma. Not only how important counseling is but different levels of trauma and recovery that you go through as a victim and books that can help you begin to understand the process. One big takeaway for me. Jessica began to better understand her father when she realized that it was his problem and not hers. Her problem was surviving and moving on. Her father's problems were so deep and ingrained in his mind that I can see no way he could ever be rehabilitated. Here's a scary thought. So many of the ideals and beliefs that he enforced are present in the religious groups today. Fanaticism has taken the place of a loving God. Toby Willis used this religious fanaticism to justify his behavior. So, if you are even slightly religious, be prepared.
The impact this book will leave on people will the life-changing. I am not a victim of child abuse or sexual assault. The horror and sadness I felt while reading this book was so intense that I cannot even imagine what people who have lived this life will feel. I guess some of them will feel relief knowing that they aren't the only ones. This was one of the revelations that Jessica realized on her road to recovery. Several times I had to put the book down and walk away. It was too overwhelming. I forced myself to read it in one day because I was afraid that if I did not then I would never pick it up and finish it. Even then I had an extremely restless night with dreams that I won't talk about. I do recommend that you read the book. First of all to understand that this happens in the world around us every single day. That our awareness and empathy is vital for people to survive this type of horror. And it is horror, not just trauma.
My emotions are mixed when it comes to Jessica's family's response and reactions before and after this story came out. My heart breaks for Brenda but I'm also angry at her as a mother. I understand her helplessness but so many opportunities presented itself for her to save her children. Having never lived it I'm not passing judgment on her. I just feel incredibly sorry for her.
I know this is a long review but the reader simply cannot say it was good or bad, yes you should read it or no you shouldn't and walk away. If someone reads this book and it doesn't touch your soul and your heart then you also have a problem. Having said that, as Jess says in the first of the book, this is a huge trigger warning before you pick the book up to read. It is explicit, raw, and heartbreaking. But after having finished the book I have more respect and admiration for Jessica Willis Fisher than any other person. Her bravery and determination to tell her story in order to help others is simply incredible.
I voluntarily received a copy of this book from Netgalley.

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had no idea who this person (or family) was, prior to reading this book. 🤷🏼‍♀️ This girl had a terrible childhood, suffering gut wrenching abuse from her father. 😢 This is an extremely difficult read with lots of trigger warnings.

[Lilo · Rating 5 out of 5]

I find it very hard to rate memoirs, especially if they are so honest, raw and heartbreaking as this one, because how do you put a score on someone's life story? But this book is so very well written, so compelling and unputdownable (really, I read the entire book in one day), I have no other choice but to give it a 5-star rating.

Jessica speaks of the most unspeakable things that were done to her during the first 23 years of her life. How she manages to bring out the truth with such strength and such powerful words is beyond me. This book is beautiful in all its tragedy and it is amazing how the last few chapters of the book are filled with nothing but hope and stories of healing, without leaving out an honest review of how difficult it is to scramble the pieces of your life back together and build a new one out of it.

I admire Jessica so much, she has so much skill as a writer, both music and books, and I think it's incredibly powerful she took back the narrative and made it her own.

[Valleri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Big thanks to both Thomas Nelson and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review an early copy of Unspeakable.

Jess grew up the eldest daughter of a large, highly controlled, fundamentalist household, where the 12 children were cut off from anything unapproved by their father. When the Willis family rocketed into fame after their appearances on multiple televised talent competitions, Jessica and her family landed their own reality TV show and toured across the globe, singing and dancing for millions.

Unspeakable is a harrowing story to read. It's incredibly well-written ... and is also filled with fear, confusion, and secrecy. I can't imagine growing up in such a tightly controlled environment (home-schooled and attending house churches) where there were no friends or teachers to confide in. How does a child figure out what is okay and what isn't on their own?

I will never forget Unspeakable's story of courage and strength.

[Kristen Rosener · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was one of the thousands who watched The Willis Clan on TLC, and their audition on America's Got Talent captivated me immediately. When I heard about Toby's arrest, I was shocked and grieved. Here was yet another professed Christian exposed as a liar and a fraud. When I learned that Jessica was releasing a book, I couldn't wait to get my hands on it.

I really wanted to give this book 5 stars, but I couldn't for two reasons.

First, this book is a hard, hard read. If you have any history of sexual or physical abuse, this book will no doubt trigger memories and feelings that are painful. Immediately, starting with the prologue, I was swept away and into Jessica's world. In small ways, I related to her story. I was raised in a semi-large, musical, homeschooling, Christian family too. For most of my life, I also traveled in a bus with my family to sing and play. However, I never experienced abuse like her, her siblings, and her mother, and reading about their life was nauseating and difficult. Most nights as I sat reading, tears were in my eyes and a knot was in my stomach. While I couldn't seem to put the book down, it is raw and graphic, and not at all a pleasant read.

Second, while I appreciated the honesty with which Jessica shares her confusion regarding faith, the book ended without a clear, concise explanation of the God of the Bible. Chapter after chapter, Jessica empties her heart, sharing her struggles with misinterpreted Scriptures that had been used to abuse and destroy. I appreciated her vulnerability in sharing her journey with the world, relating to her frantic search to disentangle truth from error, but I closed the book saddened because the conclusion was vague and incomplete.

I'll say what the book should have: The problem wasn't the Scriptures, the problem was the mishandling of the Scriptures. The problem was a man - Toby - professing to be a follower of God and touting Bible truths, half-truths, and outright lies, while habitually living in opposition to everything that God defines as a Christian. The Biblical God is a God of holiness and righteousness who WILL execute justice, yet He is also a God of great love and mercy and grace. A one-sided Christianity isn't Biblical Christianity. While I'm grateful for therapy and the common graces we have to aid in healing, Jessica's ultimate freedom, and power, and rest is, and will always only be, at the cross.

This book was well-written, articulate, vulnerable, and full of passion, but it would have delivered the hope that people need if it had ended with praise to God for being everything that her father is NOT, instead of vaguely mentioned as if He were a carry-on in her suitcase for her journey. God sustained Jessica, and I hope and pray that she will see that and feel His love and grace.

2.5 stars.

[Joänna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am blown away by the quality of writing and beauty in this tragic story. Best biography I've read in years, and I've read a lot of great ones. Jessica organized this book so well and captured my interest from beginning to end without losing me once.

What really set this book apart from others was her unflinching look at her healing process. She describes the immense therapy and work she has gone through to reclaim herself. She listed techniques, titles of books, practitioners, and even seminars that aided her healing journey-which emphasized how far she has come. She added authenticity to her memories by welcoming us into her finding of self. Too many books skip the healing portion of the story and to me that discounts how crucial and difficult that stage is. Jessica outlined every step for the reader. For this reason, I feel 'Unspeakable' can be uniquely impactful to others still in the midst of difficult circumstances. I am comfortable giving this book to a friend currently in a violent relationship, whereas I haven't previously felt other books were the right fit. I think this book will help penetrate the darkness my friend is feeling, let her be seen and known, while pointing her towards light.

Another element I appreciate about this narrative was the care given to telling only her own story. Her siblings are predominantly absent from the most dramatic portions, and when they are mentioned, their names are excluded.

Highly recommend the audio version, as it has a few added musical elements that were nice as well, but I'll buy the paper copy to keep on hand.

[Jackson Hicks · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honest and bleakly raw, Unspeakable is a nausea inducing but hope inspiring memoir. While not a critique of large families, homeschooling, or christianity this book shines a spotlight on the abuse that is accepted within the confines of christian fundamentalism.

Brave, bold, and very well written, I highly recommend 10/10.

[Carrie Brownell · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was first introduced to the Willis Clan on America's Got Talent. They reminded me of the Duggars and I followed them for awhile. Hearing about their sexual abuse scandal was discouraging (to put it mildly) and I was so sad for their family. I didn't realize that Jess had written a book until just this past week. Published by Thomas Nelson (that will tell you something if you're paying attention to publishers) and available on Audible, I downloaded it and gave it a listen.

The book is very interesting in that Jess takes you through the behind-the-scenes of the Willis' public life. How did her family truly operate? What sort of person was her dad in private? It's a scary story. It isn't clean, neat and pretty. Jess and the rest of her siblings have been through some tremendously terrible experiences.

Unfortunately - but very, very predictably - when someone claims to be a Christian in public, but fails to act like it in private, they can lead their children astray. That is the saddest part of this story, although Jess is quick to point out that she is still exploring what faith means to her. She hasn't found a church she feels "safe" in yet and still has many questions about Who God Is as a result of being raised without the Gospel, while being told that she was raised precisely to Biblical standards. Her faith journey makes this a perfect Thomas Nelson book.

That aside, I think this book is really, really important for conservative Christians to read. Why? Because we all sin and fall short of the glory of God and when we do not recognize sin for sin and call it out appropriately (i.e., accurately and hastily) then we risk, well, everything. What Jess's dad did to her and her siblings was atrocious. It needed to and should have been called out immediately. Instead it was hidden away and the effects are staggering. His actions would have always had consequences but letting his sin go for so many decades was not healthy for his children or himself. Instead it caused a million more "deaths" than would have been. Much was lost by covering sin instead of exposing it. That was my biggest takeaway from this read. It is better to endure the pain of sharp, quick death of sin than allowing it to fester and grow. It's scary to uncover sin. But so, so necessary.

[Kristen Yoder · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the hardest-to-read books I've ever finished. I saw a Goodreads review where someone asked, "How can you put a rating on someone's story?" This is a valid example of that. I don't agree with all of Jessica's beliefs. Regardless, her courage to speak and face her pain is incredible. Be aware of your own processing when you read this book - she made a comment near the beginning of the book, I think, that we have a choice to read her story, but she didn't have a choice to experience it.

I think we honor people when we are willing to engage with their stories. Please do that with Jessica's memoir.

[Emily M · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a hard book to read. As a memoir, it's well-constructed and well-written. I couldn't put it down. I can't say that I enjoyed it because the subject matter was so horrible, but it helped me understand a bit more why someone I'm connected to has not yet fingered the brother we're 95% sure molested her throughout childhood and why she has instead acted the way she did towards her ex-husband, who was one of the good men like Jessica's husband Sean. It's hard for an outsider to understand how someone could defend a toxic family member and reject the good people who want to help, but the book truly illuminates the confusion in which a victim or a family of victims may be trapped. It's well worth reading.

Having grown up in a safe, happy, and loving Evangelical homeschool family, it's hard for me to read about such evil hyprocrites like Jessica's father and wonder how many of the more hardcore large families I knew growing up had the same facade covering a more dark and traumatic reality. When some of my friends escaped a cult in their early twenties and lived with my parents for a while to get used to the real world, our family talked about how our healthy family life made us naive to the ugliness that can be hiding under the surface of people who claim to share our faith. This book is indeed eye opening, and I hope that it has made me more discerning and compassionate. I appreciate that she doesn't vilify all homeschoolers or large families or Christians writ large, simply stating the problematic assumptions and teachings that were part of her experience of all those subcultures. Jessica writes of her conflicted relationship with her mother and siblings who have stayed in the band with a notable graciousness, even as she points out that they're telling a story different at some seemingly significant points from hers. I am moved and impressed with the maturity and restraint that accompany her determination for truth and recovering her own voice. I've been a fan of Jessica as a musical artist for a long time and look forward to following where she goes from here.

[Joy Beaver · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book wrecked me. After following the Willis family at height of their popularity, I was intrigued by what had happened to them, so preordered this book. It hit my Kindle this morning, and I started reading it to just get a taste of her writing style. Instead, I ended up reading the entire book without taking a break. The harrowing details of her painful story are captivating, but the deeper appeal of her story is her ability to make you feel her confusion, her torment, her struggles long after the abuse ended. Several times I had to lay my device down and cry with her before I could continue reading. With alarming and refreshing transparency, Jessica is not afraid to ask the hard questions. We should all be kinder to our younger selves and not be afraid to do the hard work to live the life we deserve.

[Julie-Anne · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is tragically beautiful. What a powerful memoir.

[Emily Luebke · Rating 5 out of 5]

I know it is very weird to give a star rating to a memoir. It will never stop being weird. But this was a well written and unflinching account of a truly terrible childhood, and escaping from it. This book doesn't sugar coat or shy away from the ongoing struggle of survivors of this kind of abuse!

This book has trigger warnings for a reason! if you are not in a good place PLEASE HEED THEM! These trigger warnings are not a suggestion! Even someone like me, who is not triggered by the subject matter, still had anxiety spikes while listening to this book. Just being an older sister made this such a hard listen.

I loved that Jess did not leave out the ongoing struggle! She didn't pretend that she was all better and "cured" of her issues at the time of her writing. She didn't claim her fraught relationship with her siblings and mother were perfect and repaired. She made the reality clear: that recovering from PTSD is a lifelong process! I found that infinitely more hopeful than how many of the people in memoirs like this try to frame the ending as though they have come through all their troubles and they're done. She even admitted her continued struggles with a faith that let her down time and time again!

If you like reading this type of memoir and can handle the triggers (did I mention how those are not a suggestion?!) this was a powerful read!

[Pamela · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very hard read and the abuse is shocking. I enjoyed the Willis Clan when it aired on TV and was shocked when the father was arrested, but had no idea of the depths of his abuse and control. Jessica's father twisted the Biblical God to control the family and it gave her a wrong view of God. Sadly she has come to believe in a New Age god instead instead of the one true God. I must warn against the recommendations for The Shack book & Brené Brown. Her therapy involves non-Biblical practices and yet this book is published for a Christian audience. Beware.

[Bailey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Exceptional

Smart, thought-provoking, honest depiction of abuse, escape and healing. I read it in one sitting. Hope she finds peace. Definitely worth a read.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I see so much of myself in Jessica’s story and I hope that one day I can be even a fraction of as brave as she is

[Caitie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strange what survives the weight of years; strange what falls away.

Content Warnings: sexual abuse, verbal abuse, using religion as abuse.

This was a heartbreaking book about a family that looked perfect on the outside, but in fact was hiding something dark underneath. I vaguely recall hearing about the Willis Clan, probably around the time of their TV show, and the aftermath of the father of the family was charged with abuse of some of the daughters. So I was curious about what happened.

In this book, Jessica Willis Fisher, the oldest daughter, describes her childhood under the thumb of an overbearing (to say the least) father and a mother who was bent to his whim. From an early age, Jessica recalls her father touching her in ways that she didn't understand at the time. She told no one because her father said that no one would believe her, and since Jessica's mom was so under her father's spell, she didn't even tell her mom. Her family was somewhat isolated, building a house in rural Tennessee, being homeschooled "off the grid," as Jessica puts it and relying on each other.

Over the years, Jessica and her family honed their musical talents, and her father wanted to essentially market these talents. They would go on the road with songs they'd written themselves with kind of an Irish twist. However, when the kids would practice, Jessica's father would get mad easily and sometimes even throw things at them if it wasn't perfect. When Jessica finally gets the chance to escape in her twenties she finally gets the chance to face her past...and her father.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was very difficult to get through, because the abuse Jessica lived through was so intense and she offers her story up without fear. She is a living example of strength and resilience and although I don’t know her, I found myself thinking of how proud I am of her for finding her voice.

This book was so well written. I believe it’s important to bear witness to the stories of others, especially when they are difficult to hear, but please check the trigger warnings if you read this. ❤️

[Lovely Day]

DNFd at 14% because I just couldn’t listen to the graphic abuse. Such a sad situation 😢

[Wendy Hall-Duenez · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of those times that I wish I had the capability to write the most in-depth review and able to pour all my emotions into those words. Jessica Willis Fisher bravely told her story in this well written book. I believe there is healing to be found in this young woman’s story for those who suffered any type of abuse. I listened to Jessica read this and it was like sitting and listening to her tell me her story. I watched the Willis Clan in their TLC series and on AGT and I was a fan but I never liked Toby who is their “father”. He came off as controlling and too hard on his beautiful family. I did not know the true horrors those precious children were enduring. After listening to this book I quickly ordered a hardcover copy to Grace my shelves. I don’t do this very often as I am a kindle fan. By listening to the audio you get to hear her sing her original music in her beautiful voice. The music enriches her story. Jessica shares her healing journey which includes the different therapeutic steps she went thru to find her way back to herself. A very intimate look at how she found her path to healing. I hope she is able to continue on this path and keeps telling her truths.

This book does contain some trigger warnings. She does give you the chance to skip ahead. I appreciated that. I know there are some who may have trouble reading those parts but I applaud Jessica’s bravery. If you don’t read the book you should at least add her lovely music to you Spotify lists. Her voice is beautiful.

[Donna Simpson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a heartbreaking book on every level.

I watched the Willis Clan reality TV show and to my shame, I never suspected the horrors that were going on behind the scenes. That's how good the production values were, and why it's a mistake to see 'Reality TV' as real life.

Jessica has written an unflinching portrayal of how a cult of personality - run by one sociopath, her father - can ruin countless lives with the aid of the indoctrination of a religious belief that a father has the 'ownership' of his daughter until she marries, when he 'gives her away'.

Everyone failed Jessica - her father most of all, but also her mother and others in their faith community - but she is unstinting and unflinching in exposing it all and not sparing herself in the process, how she could have done things differently, why she didn't, and how she is moving forward.

I loved that she portrayed therapy as a two-way street that requires a lot of work, not just passive acceptance. She was fortunate, it appears, in her therapist, because she did the work and has become a remarkably eloquent champion of therapy.

This is a grim read, there are no two ways about it, and kudos to her for her grace, compassion for her siblings and even her mother, because I don't know if, in her place, I could even be half as gracious.

[Krista · Rating 5 out of 5]

First of all I need to say, this book is VERY heavy.
I listened to this book, read by the author. Unspeakable is a raw, story of a girl growing up with sexual and verbal abuse.
I love how books and reading have helped her to thrive and recover from all the trauma from her past. She is very humble but real about her story. I love that she still believes in God even though she faced her abuse under the cover of Christianity and “strong family values.”

[Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jessica is the oldest of the Willis children from the TLC show The Willis Family. The father was arrested for abusing several of the girls and she has written a memoir to share her story.
Reading Jessica’s words as she tried to explain what was happening in her family home was very difficult at times. She didn’t hold back. How hard it must have been to live and relive that abuse. I imagine only people who have been in situations where they were controlled to this degree can understand why the Willis kids didn’t use their voice to stop the abuse. I appreciate her raw honesty both as she shared about the abuse and as she took us on her journey of healing.
It is obvious that she is a master with words not only in her song writing but also in much of the descriptions she uses in her book. Although it didn’t always flow in a way that allowed the reader to know exactly where we were chronologically, that kind jumping around sort of adds to the raw intensity of her story. I think overall she did a very impressive job recalling the details of her life and telling them in a way that allows the reader to follow along and understand. It wasn’t an easy read but I knew it wouldn’t be when I opened it.
I received an ARC in exchange for my honest opinion.

[Debbie Slaughter · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's tough to give a 5 star review to a book full of sadness and abuse, but Jessica told her story well.

This was a family that my family watched on TV, and loved the music aspect of it. But my husband would always say there was something weird about the dad and he was right. Now having read the book, it makes me realize that TV is so controlled and nothing is as it seems.

I think she will get mixed reviews about one aspect of her story and it's the fact that her mother knew all along that the girls were being abused.

Jessica's story of survival is incredible. She was basically abused her entire life by her evil father and yet God put some incredible people in her life to help her.

If you follow her on social media, it's so good to see her happy and thriving, in spite of the evil that she had to live with.

I do recommend this book, but with the knowledge that it will be tough for some to read. It's almost one that you don't want to pass on to others, and yet, you just never know who needs the courage it provides.

[Alix St Amant · Rating 5 out of 5]

You’ll need tissues for this one, and you absolutely must listen to the audio version, as the song she ends the book with is haunting and beautiful.
I remember hearing tidbits about the author when the news story broke a while back. I hadn’t previously heard of this family or their music or anything. But it unfortunately wasn’t a surprise to hear of yet another large conservative family undergoing hidden abuse from the inside.
This memoir was hard for me to get through. Personally triggering in several places. I had to turn it off a few times and take a break. But.. I kept going back to it. Couldn’t stop thinking about it. The author’s extreme courage in telling her story deserves to be honored by people lending their ear to hear her. And the beauty and redemption of her healing journey; priceless. To everyone who has lived their lives feeling that they don’t have a voice, give this book a listen. And may you break the barriers that were placed on you and find your voice too.

[Kelly Pramberger · Rating 5 out of 5]

This ARC was given to me by Thomas Nelson in exchange for an honest review.

Five stars for Fisher! What a detailed book about her life as one of 12 children born to an abusive father. It was difficult to read at times due to the subject matter but with excellent writing and emotion it's worth it.

"Unspeakable: Surviving My childhood and Finding My Voice shares:

An unflinching look at the manipulation and codependency that defines abusive family relationships
The formative moments of Jessica's childhood through her eyes
An unforgettable story of courage and strength
Beautifully written and monumental in its bravery, Fisher's story is proof that we can all become so much more that the things that happen to us."

[Dani Rae · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a terrible, heart-wrenching, infuriating, beautiful story. The whole time I listened I either had tears welling up in my eyes or anger and infuriation making me want to fling my phone into a lake. The abuse this family suffered through was tremendous. It reaffirmed to me that religion, Christianity in particular, is a giant shit stain on humanity and helps hide, house and protect dangerous perverts, narcissists and abusers. Living under a roof with a parent who is a narcissistic abuser is messy, confusing, and will kill all self-esteem and confidence, especially when it comes to trusting yourself to make any decision. Top that off with spiritual/religious abuse and a core brainwashing to fully submit to authority figures... It's a miracle she escaped.❤️‍🩹

[Jenna Imgrund · Rating 5 out of 5]

My goodness. This book was an over eight hour listen and brought up things for me that would have taken a few months of therapy.

I highly recommend listening to the audiobook version (also easier for people to listen to if they want to be able to avoid being retraumatized by certain parts, she gives trigger warnings).

Wish I could give a more in depth review, but there are truly no words for what Jessica's memoir stirs up inside me. God bless her and Shaun, I wish her all the best on her road to recovery.

[kellie Bradshaw · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully Written

Thank you for your courage in speaking out and realizing you are worth having happiness and security. Your story is difficult to read, but having been married to a narcissistic sociopath, I recognized many aspects of my own life. Thank you again for telling your story.

[Julie Anne · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a really interesting true story of the oldest daughter in a large homeschooled family who became famous for their music and had a reality show about their family on TLC. I found many aspects of Jessica’s upbringing under an eccentric, narcissistic, abusive, father relatable to mine. I appreciate the author sharing her story and raising awareness of abusive family situations like hers. Sadly (as far as I can tell) the author seems to have stepped away from the Christian faith.. but I understand how hard it must be for her to make sense of what she was taught and experienced growing up with an abusive father who claimed to be a Christian.
Warning that there are a lot of really difficult parts to read in this book, describing sexual/physical abuse.