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Big Gay Wedding
Named one of Shondaland and Town & Country's Best Books of May • Named one of Lambda Literary's Most Anticipated LGBTQIA+ Books • Named one of Cosmopolitan's Best Books of 2023 (So Far)
An unashamedly proud, loud, and hilarious novel about a small town that’s forever changed by a big gay wedding, perfect for fans of Red, White & Royal Blue and The Guncle
Two grooms. One mother of a problem.
Barnett Durang has a secret. No, not THAT secret. His widowed mother has long known he’s gay. The secret is Barnett is getting married. At his mother’s farm. In their small Louisiana town. She just doesn’t know it yet.
It’ll be an intimate affair. Just two hundred or so of the most fabulous folks Barnett is shipping in from the “heathen coasts,” as Mom likes to call them, turning her quiet rescue farm for misfit animals into a most unlikely wedding venue.
But there are forces, both within this modern new family and in the town itself, that really don’t want to see this handsome couple march down the aisle. It’ll be the biggest, gayest event in the town’s history if they can pull it off, and after a glitter-filled week, nothing will ever be the same. Big Gay Wedding is an uplifting book about the power of family and the unconditional love of a mother for her son.
An unashamedly proud, loud, and hilarious novel about a small town that’s forever changed by a big gay wedding, perfect for fans of Red, White & Royal Blue and The Guncle
Two grooms. One mother of a problem.
Barnett Durang has a secret. No, not THAT secret. His widowed mother has long known he’s gay. The secret is Barnett is getting married. At his mother’s farm. In their small Louisiana town. She just doesn’t know it yet.
It’ll be an intimate affair. Just two hundred or so of the most fabulous folks Barnett is shipping in from the “heathen coasts,” as Mom likes to call them, turning her quiet rescue farm for misfit animals into a most unlikely wedding venue.
But there are forces, both within this modern new family and in the town itself, that really don’t want to see this handsome couple march down the aisle. It’ll be the biggest, gayest event in the town’s history if they can pull it off, and after a glitter-filled week, nothing will ever be the same. Big Gay Wedding is an uplifting book about the power of family and the unconditional love of a mother for her son.
336 pages, Hardcover
First published May 30, 2023
154 people are currently reading
14635 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 907 reviews
July 17, 2024
I am bawling. It has been quite some time since I've cried this hard reading something, and even longer still that I finished a book in a day.
I felt a whole range of emotions while reading this, including anger, happiness, and sadness. This book isn't about being gay. It's about love. While the title pokes fun and plays with humor, there are some hard hitting topics.
Barnett grew up in Mader, LA. While fictional, you probably know the type. His mom overlooks his "gayness." When he comes home for a visit and announces he is getting married, chaos ensues.
While I began the book sort of hating mom, I ended it sympathizing with her. No, not for her views. She grows as a person in the novel in the way I hope other conservative southerners will.
As an aside, how can I, 0% an animal person, be crying over a sheep?
I felt a whole range of emotions while reading this, including anger, happiness, and sadness. This book isn't about being gay. It's about love. While the title pokes fun and plays with humor, there are some hard hitting topics.
Barnett grew up in Mader, LA. While fictional, you probably know the type. His mom overlooks his "gayness." When he comes home for a visit and announces he is getting married, chaos ensues.
While I began the book sort of hating mom, I ended it sympathizing with her. No, not for her views. She grows as a person in the novel in the way I hope other conservative southerners will.
As an aside, how can I, 0% an animal person, be crying over a sheep?
April 27, 2023
QUICK TAKE: it's basically SCHITT'S CREEK meets IN & OUT (hooray for an early 90s Kevin Kline movie reference), and it's adorable. Heartwarming and full of humor, I really enjoyed the read. It doesn't reinvent the wheel, and I might have found myself empathizing with the mom whose gay kid really rushes her to accept him for who he is (which is a weird side for me to be on here), but overall this is the perfect summer beach read. Easy, breezy and will leave you with all the feels.
December 14, 2024
First…
This book has been named one of Shondaland and Town & Country’s best books of May 2023, one of Lambda Literary’s most anticipated LGBTQIA+ books and Cosmopolitan’s Best books of 2023.
Second…
This author has an interesting resume. He is an author, playwright and screenwriter. His debut novel, “A Star is Bored” is apparently about an uptight celebrity assistant struggling to manage his eccentric movie star boss.
And…That book was inspired in part by his time as an assistant to late actress Carrie Fisher. I have ordered this one from my library, so I am looking forward to reading it.
He is also a two-time Emmy award winner from his time as a TV news journalist.
And…One last fun fact, if you didn’t know, Lane is married to fellow author, Stephen Rowley who wrote “The Guncle” which I also read and reviewed this month. Review here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
On to this story…
“I’m engaged.”
“Engaged in what?”
“Engaged to be married to a great guy.”
So…Farmer Mom are you going to be happy for the couple? Your only son and the love of his life?
She had expectations that he was coming home to help her on the farm.
But…We readers had expectations for a Big Gay Wedding. Of course, we did, because that is what the title of this book is, right?
What is the problem?
Well…Farmer Mom hasn’t exactly been accepting and/or supportive of her son being gay.
And…That gives a sense of why each chapter begins with:
Countdown to Damnation: this many days/hours/minutes.
So…What will it take to get her to change her thinking?
There is a lot of spirit and a charming narrative voice…
With…Animals to love (with Kleenex moments) and people to care about, and quirky family members and expectations to overcome.
And…We would all like to believe that our loved ones are going to accept us just as we are, because we offer unconditional love to them automatically, right?
But…Understanding, doesn’t always come easily, especially when we have different ideals and expectations for our loved ones.
This is the gift that Lane conveys in his writing.
There may be a path to growth, but it doesn’t necessarily mean it will be an easy one to follow.
And…There will be sensitively written moments in which the author has readers face some difficult subjects (including homophobia and hate crimes).
And…He does it in a way that has characters empowered to stand up for themselves and their loved ones.
These are worthy reading moments.
Will Farmer Mom find herself moving towards acceptance of her son?
Do readers get to experience the big gay wedding?
As readers…We are definitely invited.
Humorous. Tender. Thoughtful. Thought-provoking. Uplifting.
This is…A celebration of love of all kinds – a parent and child, animal and human connections and two souls choosing each other.
I also recommend checking out my Goodreads friend Mai's review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show.... She is the one who also turned me on to this book. Thank you Mai. 🙏
This book has been named one of Shondaland and Town & Country’s best books of May 2023, one of Lambda Literary’s most anticipated LGBTQIA+ books and Cosmopolitan’s Best books of 2023.
Second…
This author has an interesting resume. He is an author, playwright and screenwriter. His debut novel, “A Star is Bored” is apparently about an uptight celebrity assistant struggling to manage his eccentric movie star boss.
And…That book was inspired in part by his time as an assistant to late actress Carrie Fisher. I have ordered this one from my library, so I am looking forward to reading it.
He is also a two-time Emmy award winner from his time as a TV news journalist.
And…One last fun fact, if you didn’t know, Lane is married to fellow author, Stephen Rowley who wrote “The Guncle” which I also read and reviewed this month. Review here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
On to this story…
“I’m engaged.”
“Engaged in what?”
“Engaged to be married to a great guy.”
So…Farmer Mom are you going to be happy for the couple? Your only son and the love of his life?
She had expectations that he was coming home to help her on the farm.
But…We readers had expectations for a Big Gay Wedding. Of course, we did, because that is what the title of this book is, right?
What is the problem?
Well…Farmer Mom hasn’t exactly been accepting and/or supportive of her son being gay.
And…That gives a sense of why each chapter begins with:
Countdown to Damnation: this many days/hours/minutes.
So…What will it take to get her to change her thinking?
There is a lot of spirit and a charming narrative voice…
With…Animals to love (with Kleenex moments) and people to care about, and quirky family members and expectations to overcome.
And…We would all like to believe that our loved ones are going to accept us just as we are, because we offer unconditional love to them automatically, right?
But…Understanding, doesn’t always come easily, especially when we have different ideals and expectations for our loved ones.
This is the gift that Lane conveys in his writing.
There may be a path to growth, but it doesn’t necessarily mean it will be an easy one to follow.
And…There will be sensitively written moments in which the author has readers face some difficult subjects (including homophobia and hate crimes).
And…He does it in a way that has characters empowered to stand up for themselves and their loved ones.
These are worthy reading moments.
Will Farmer Mom find herself moving towards acceptance of her son?
Do readers get to experience the big gay wedding?
As readers…We are definitely invited.
Humorous. Tender. Thoughtful. Thought-provoking. Uplifting.
This is…A celebration of love of all kinds – a parent and child, animal and human connections and two souls choosing each other.
I also recommend checking out my Goodreads friend Mai's review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show.... She is the one who also turned me on to this book. Thank you Mai. 🙏
May 30, 2023
A son living in LA, his ‘Being Gay for Dummies’ book burned by his dad in junior year. A mom who’s never acknowledged her son’s sexuality, hoping the same son will return home. Forever. Then the son announces he’s getting married. To a man.
Big Gay Wedding is a story you start reading and don’t really know what to expect. Will it be absurd and almost over the top? Will it be heartfelt? Will it be gayer than gay? Well, let me tell you that the writing felt a little like Anxious People by Fredrik Backman meets The Guncle by Steven Rowley. The latter might not be accidental because Byron Lane and Steven Rowley are a couple. And just like The Guncle, this book has hilarious moments. Tear-streaked ones. And, of course, all layered with rainbow glitter.
I loved the mom-son relationship, the way Chrissy slowly acknowledges that Barnett is gay and starts supporting him unconditionally, no matter what. I cherished Paw-Paw’s comparison of squirrels (celebrated) and rats (shunned) to heterosexual and gay people. I liked that the book (written in third person present tense) focuses more on Chrissy than on Barnett. I simply adored sweet cinnamon roll Ezra. And that wedding ceremony was magical. So many times, a smile danced on my face, and at other times I laughed out loud.
But I have to be honest. There were things I liked a little less. Sometimes the story was a bit too much for me. And now I’m in doubt. Do I rate this book four stars because I think the current average on Goodreads is way too low? Or do I rate the story three stars because it was a bit over the top?
Well, the decision is made, I’m going for the first and give this book a glorious four stars because I actually enjoyed reading it, and that smile just won’t leave my face, even with the occasional lump in my throat.
I received an ARC from Henry Holt & Company and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
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Big Gay Wedding is a story you start reading and don’t really know what to expect. Will it be absurd and almost over the top? Will it be heartfelt? Will it be gayer than gay? Well, let me tell you that the writing felt a little like Anxious People by Fredrik Backman meets The Guncle by Steven Rowley. The latter might not be accidental because Byron Lane and Steven Rowley are a couple. And just like The Guncle, this book has hilarious moments. Tear-streaked ones. And, of course, all layered with rainbow glitter.
I loved the mom-son relationship, the way Chrissy slowly acknowledges that Barnett is gay and starts supporting him unconditionally, no matter what. I cherished Paw-Paw’s comparison of squirrels (celebrated) and rats (shunned) to heterosexual and gay people. I liked that the book (written in third person present tense) focuses more on Chrissy than on Barnett. I simply adored sweet cinnamon roll Ezra. And that wedding ceremony was magical. So many times, a smile danced on my face, and at other times I laughed out loud.
But I have to be honest. There were things I liked a little less. Sometimes the story was a bit too much for me. And now I’m in doubt. Do I rate this book four stars because I think the current average on Goodreads is way too low? Or do I rate the story three stars because it was a bit over the top?
Well, the decision is made, I’m going for the first and give this book a glorious four stars because I actually enjoyed reading it, and that smile just won’t leave my face, even with the occasional lump in my throat.
I received an ARC from Henry Holt & Company and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Follow me on Instagram
June 9, 2023
Why did we spend 20 pages talking about a sheep?
Look, this book wasn't the worst book I've read, but it was very much not what was promised. It was described as a comedy and like "Schitt's Creek." The only thing "Schitt's Creek"-like was the fact that there was a gay son. I also didn't find a lot of comedy in it. It was mostly just depressing waiting for the mom to come around and for people to stop committing atrocities. I get it. It's a small town with homophobic people. But I was promised COMEDY. This was not it. I'm glad everyone came around and loved the wedding and had a good time or turn of heart. But it was not funny along the way. It was complicated and heartbreaking and hurtful. Which would've been fine if I was going in expecting it to be a drama.
Also, the last 20 pages are about the fricking sheep dying. I love her and was very sad, but that was the biggest waste of 20 pages. It dragged and felt slightly out of place in a gay wedding book.
*I won this in a Goodreads giveaway*
Look, this book wasn't the worst book I've read, but it was very much not what was promised. It was described as a comedy and like "Schitt's Creek." The only thing "Schitt's Creek"-like was the fact that there was a gay son. I also didn't find a lot of comedy in it. It was mostly just depressing waiting for the mom to come around and for people to stop committing atrocities. I get it. It's a small town with homophobic people. But I was promised COMEDY. This was not it. I'm glad everyone came around and loved the wedding and had a good time or turn of heart. But it was not funny along the way. It was complicated and heartbreaking and hurtful. Which would've been fine if I was going in expecting it to be a drama.
Also, the last 20 pages are about the fricking sheep dying. I love her and was very sad, but that was the biggest waste of 20 pages. It dragged and felt slightly out of place in a gay wedding book.
*I won this in a Goodreads giveaway*
May 30, 2023
I was such a fan of Lane's A Star is Bored, so I went into this with high expectations. Luckily it surpassed them.
This book is genuinely one of the funniest things I've read in a long time and is also full of really moving and emotional moments. As someone who is not so secretly very soft, I loved this story of a mother and son struggling to overcome their upbringing and find their way back to each other. The author treats all of the characters with grace, even when they continually mess up. Of course, I cried a few times, but I also laughed out loud and couldn't put it down. I could go on and on about all the characters I loved and the farm full of misfit animals named after 90s sitcom characters, but I mostly just want to highly recommend that everyone read this.
Thanks so much to Henry Holt and Co. and Netgalley for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.
This book is genuinely one of the funniest things I've read in a long time and is also full of really moving and emotional moments. As someone who is not so secretly very soft, I loved this story of a mother and son struggling to overcome their upbringing and find their way back to each other. The author treats all of the characters with grace, even when they continually mess up. Of course, I cried a few times, but I also laughed out loud and couldn't put it down. I could go on and on about all the characters I loved and the farm full of misfit animals named after 90s sitcom characters, but I mostly just want to highly recommend that everyone read this.
Thanks so much to Henry Holt and Co. and Netgalley for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.
June 24, 2023
Color me unimpressed. I have been anticipating the release of this book and was delighted when it became avaliable through my public library. This book was...fine. I wouldn't really place it in the category of gay romance, more in "self development journey of a middle aged woman from homophobe to mild ally" and quite frankly - baby don't market this shit to gay audiences if this is what we're getting. It's 2023, sure there are shitty conservatives trying to make the world harder for queer people. The people who need to be swayed by this book aren't going to buy a book titled "Big Gay Wedding." It fell flat for more me and straight up if I were Ezra, I'd be pissed Mr. Barnett did little to combat his mother's blatant rudeness in the early portions of the novel.
I suppose I may be in the minority here, but stories like this one feel tired for me.
I suppose I may be in the minority here, but stories like this one feel tired for me.
June 14, 2023
That ending just about broke me.😭
June 18, 2023
What better way to celebrate Pride than with a Big Gay Wedding. I was expecting a light summer beach read, but what I found was a ball of the feels with some humor tossed in. Don’t get me wrong, I liked the book, but it wasn’t the book I was expecting. I’ll admit this book was hard at times. It was brutally honest about the struggles loved ones can have with accepting gay people and there was blatant homophobia and hate speech. But there was also revolutions and love and support. I loved the farm and the animals a lot. Clearly Paw-Paw was the best character in the whole thing (although Bitcoin was pretty special too). I think if I try to talk about the plot to this one I will give too much away and spoil it, so I urge you to read the description and pick this one up, but just be sure to have Kleenex nearby.
June 3, 2023
this book was such a delight! I related a lot to Barnett and Chrissy’s relationship and appreciated that commentary (a lot of books focus on characters either being shunned by their families for being gay or fully accepted but not really in the middle). Lane writes with such wit and charm that really brought these characters to life, and made me laugh out loud multiple times.
July 2, 2023
I loved it. I laughed. I cried. I loved paw paw and Victoria. And I absolutely adored chrissy and Elaine’s bond ❤️🥺
June 5, 2023
Having grown up on a farm, the setting for this book couldn't have been more perfect! It took me back to some of my very favourite memories. The only thing missing was clearly a Big Gay Wedding!
There were so many laugh out loud moments in this book. The chocolate situation had me howling! The macaws, so funny.
I enjoyed the fact the story was funny, but also very touching. The relationship between Barnett and his mother, Chrissy had its hurdles. At times I really struggled reading about the way Chrissy felt about her son, his fiance and the wedding. But as much as I struggled reading it, it also made me realize these are real situations that the LGBTQIA community face daily. It isn't sunshine everyday.
I was very thankful for a happy outcome. Many happy outcomes actually! You will have to read Big Gay Wedding to see for yourself.
My thanks to Henry Holt & Co for this gifted copy!
There were so many laugh out loud moments in this book. The chocolate situation had me howling! The macaws, so funny.
I enjoyed the fact the story was funny, but also very touching. The relationship between Barnett and his mother, Chrissy had its hurdles. At times I really struggled reading about the way Chrissy felt about her son, his fiance and the wedding. But as much as I struggled reading it, it also made me realize these are real situations that the LGBTQIA community face daily. It isn't sunshine everyday.
I was very thankful for a happy outcome. Many happy outcomes actually! You will have to read Big Gay Wedding to see for yourself.
My thanks to Henry Holt & Co for this gifted copy!
June 10, 2023
I'd like to start this review by saying thank you to the publisher, author, and Goodreads, as I did receive a free copy of this book by winning a Goodreads giveaway.
DNF'd at page 122/320
The concept for this book sounded great but I do feel as though it is poorly executed. I wanted to read this book because the premise of a gay romcom with Schitt's Creek vibes sounded very intriguing. However what makes Schitt's Creek funny is the quirky and out of touch rich people navigating their new rural surroundings, meeting and forming relationships with the working class people around them, and adapting to their new environment while still keeping their quirks.
Once reading, I was disappointed to find that the main protagonist of the gay romance story was going to be the homophobic mother. Don't get me wrong, I'm aware that this is done to show her inevitable character development and eventual acceptance of her gay son. However reading her inner dialogue is mentally draining, especially when she first meets Ezra and thinks to herself that he doesn't look like "one of those gays" that she's seen with AIDS.
That being said I feel like this book definitely would have benefited from some more shifts in character point of view. I read to almost halfway through the book and there was only one chapter that wasn't in Chrissy's POV.
A lot of the dialogue is unnecessarily drawn out, with a lot of what the characters saying adding absolutely nothing to the plot. I just finished reading chapter 9, which could be aptly described as Nichole saying a whole lot of nothing for 8 pages straight.
Lastly, my main issue with the book is with how one dimensional the characters are. The author tries to create humor by playing up the stereotypes of each of the characters, to the point that no one except Barnett has any nuance to their character. This approach to characterization became annoying very quickly and I began to zone out and become bored when certain characters like Ezra's mother would have dialogue, because I knew that what the character was about to say would be indistinguishable from what they've already said.
With all that being said I do intend to finish the book at a later date, but as it is right now I do not have the patience needed to get me through the rest of the book.
DNF'd at page 122/320
The concept for this book sounded great but I do feel as though it is poorly executed. I wanted to read this book because the premise of a gay romcom with Schitt's Creek vibes sounded very intriguing. However what makes Schitt's Creek funny is the quirky and out of touch rich people navigating their new rural surroundings, meeting and forming relationships with the working class people around them, and adapting to their new environment while still keeping their quirks.
Once reading, I was disappointed to find that the main protagonist of the gay romance story was going to be the homophobic mother. Don't get me wrong, I'm aware that this is done to show her inevitable character development and eventual acceptance of her gay son. However reading her inner dialogue is mentally draining, especially when she first meets Ezra and thinks to herself that he doesn't look like "one of those gays" that she's seen with AIDS.
That being said I feel like this book definitely would have benefited from some more shifts in character point of view. I read to almost halfway through the book and there was only one chapter that wasn't in Chrissy's POV.
A lot of the dialogue is unnecessarily drawn out, with a lot of what the characters saying adding absolutely nothing to the plot. I just finished reading chapter 9, which could be aptly described as Nichole saying a whole lot of nothing for 8 pages straight.
Lastly, my main issue with the book is with how one dimensional the characters are. The author tries to create humor by playing up the stereotypes of each of the characters, to the point that no one except Barnett has any nuance to their character. This approach to characterization became annoying very quickly and I began to zone out and become bored when certain characters like Ezra's mother would have dialogue, because I knew that what the character was about to say would be indistinguishable from what they've already said.
With all that being said I do intend to finish the book at a later date, but as it is right now I do not have the patience needed to get me through the rest of the book.
July 10, 2023
Chrissy Durang, owner of the Polite Society Ranch near New Orleans, checked two things off a list in her notebook. 1.The school bus filled with noisy children arrived for their tour of the ranch, check. 2. Barnett should be arriving later, check. 34-year-old Barnett was the light of Chrissy’s world...he was her son...her only child...the near-exact image of his dear late father. She was excited about his homecoming. She was 99.9% sure that Barnett was flying from California to tell her he was ready to take over the ranch...take care of the animals...take care of her. Instead, not long after he arrived, Barnett dropped THE bombshell about “THE BIG THING”. The Big Thing that they never ever discussed...No, no...not that he was gay. She had known that since he was 10. the BIG THING was that he was. (gasp) ENGAGED...to be MARRIED...didn't matter that it was to another man... it was that he wanted to do it there in Mader, at the Polite Society Ranch. Chrissy could think of a million things she didn’t like about Barnett’s intended husband, Ezra; and they all went into her ever present... notebook. "Hair a mess", check..."Control freak",...check... "Mother's dream-killer", big check, make those two checks...However, in spite of all the "checks and rechecks that fact remained that Barnett loved Ezra. It had been a long time since Chrissy had seen her son this happy. She went and talked to her priest about the situation, but he more than disappointed her. It was obvious that her father-in-law, Barrett's "Paw-Paw", was supportive of Barnett and Ezra, which came as no surprise...Barnett was always Paw-Paw’s favorite. Chrissy didn’t have many friends in the small town, probably because of her notebook and her checks...but she was absolutely sure of three things: 1. nobody would approve of any sort of gay nuptials, 2. Ezra’s family was downright weird, and 3. last but not least...everybody in the whole town was going to blame her for what was about to happen. The story inside the story seems awfully familiar...homophobic parent (Mom)...gay son...soon to be unpopular wedding... I'm sure there's more. If you let any of this deter you then you will have missed one truly delightful story. There were so many unexpected things that occurred in this story, that you may find that you are actually disappointed, surprised, or flabbergasted when something conventional actually does occur.
May 19, 2023
3.5 stars rounded up. Big Gay Wedding is the bighearted summer book you’re going to want to pack in your beach bag this summer. I had some small qualms with it - namely, it felt like it could’ve used a few tighter passes by an editor - but the story and the characters themselves were lovely. Read like My Best Friend’s Wedding meets Schitt’s Creek with some teary-great animal moments sprinkled in between. My thanks to the publisher for a chance to read an early copy!
July 24, 2023
I loved this book. It made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me feel so many things. This is a book about growth and change, and really looking at the things we hold on to and why we hold on to them.
This is an important book, especially in today's climate of anti-LGBTQ rhetoric.
Byron Lane, I will definitely read more of your books!
This is an important book, especially in today's climate of anti-LGBTQ rhetoric.
Byron Lane, I will definitely read more of your books!
July 25, 2023
It’s givingggggg Schitts Creek
June 12, 2023
I wanted to read this book because I was a big fan of Byron Lane's debut novel A Star is Born. I didn't want to read this book because I thought that, in the current climate where the far right is quite literally trying to make sure that trans and gender nonconforming people don't exist, a book about two (presumably) cis, white, gay men and their battle against a small town's bigotry to host their wedding didn't feel like the story that we needed. While that struggle still very much exists, it's also a story that's been told.
I was surprised and delighted to read a book that was so much more. Yes, this it's about a wedding, but the wedding itself is almost a backdrop against other challenges that unfold in ways that are both laugh-out-loud funny and tearfully poignant. Chief among them is Chrissy's relationship with her gay son, who she always believed would come home and take over the family farm. Instead, he arrives with his boyfriend and tells her that they plan to hold their wedding on the farm. In doing so, he disrupts Chrissy's expectations for what his - and in turn, her - future will look like. "It's hard when children take their own path," she's told. "It's painful when we realize our path to happiness was dependent on theirs."
This book is told from many different perspectives, including a late-in-life lamb on the farm named Elaine. One of the main voices that we hear from is Chrissy's, and I really appreciated Lane's decision to tell so much of the story from her perspective. Queer people are in such a hurry to leave, to get their "real lives" started. What happens, though, to those left behind? This book points to a path to understanding that perhaps is way oversimplified but nonetheless tells us that connecting with where we came from and, yes, facing past trauma are good places to start.
I was surprised and delighted to read a book that was so much more. Yes, this it's about a wedding, but the wedding itself is almost a backdrop against other challenges that unfold in ways that are both laugh-out-loud funny and tearfully poignant. Chief among them is Chrissy's relationship with her gay son, who she always believed would come home and take over the family farm. Instead, he arrives with his boyfriend and tells her that they plan to hold their wedding on the farm. In doing so, he disrupts Chrissy's expectations for what his - and in turn, her - future will look like. "It's hard when children take their own path," she's told. "It's painful when we realize our path to happiness was dependent on theirs."
This book is told from many different perspectives, including a late-in-life lamb on the farm named Elaine. One of the main voices that we hear from is Chrissy's, and I really appreciated Lane's decision to tell so much of the story from her perspective. Queer people are in such a hurry to leave, to get their "real lives" started. What happens, though, to those left behind? This book points to a path to understanding that perhaps is way oversimplified but nonetheless tells us that connecting with where we came from and, yes, facing past trauma are good places to start.
July 2, 2023
Ok, this was cuuuute and hilarious. The humor and the setting gave me major Schitt’s Creek vibes. I enjoyed every character and Ezra’s family was a riot. It wasn’t a romance, but I’m glad the book still portrayed Barnett and Ezra’s love.
Thank you Henry Holt for the ARC!
Thank you Henry Holt for the ARC!
July 6, 2023
I loved this. Just loved it. The raw honesty in the storytelling was just perfection. It was endearing, brutal, emotional, hilarious (Paw Paw 4 lyfe) and just such a great way to kick off my summer reading!
December 26, 2022
Loved it! Can’t wait for everyone else to get to read it!
July 9, 2023
First things first, Paw Paw is an elite character & I absolutely adored his vibes. Wacky old man. We all need a squirrel loving and accepting soul like him in our life.
But who gave Byron Lane permission to break my heart and then sew it back up by the end of this book. I will be sending you my therapy bill this month. It will always break my soul into a billion pieces reading about parents who cannot love their children because they're part of the LGBTQIA community. My eyes welled with tears when I read Barnett's mom and dad not fully accepting him and him pretending to be what he's not his entire life living on the farm.
This is a harsh reality that a lot of us can't understand. That's why I read books like "Big Gay Wedding" so I can step into someone else's shoes and understand what my neighbors experience. I consider myself an ally. I want to continue to learn. I want to help make life better for everyone around me. I hope that by reading and educating myself I can learn myself of to communicate and open my mind + heart more!
I am so glad I got to read this book. Its all Schitt's Creek vibes all day. Victoria could have walked right off the set of that show. I adored Ezra's mom. She was over the top. She was hilarious. I thrived when I got to read from her point of view. We stan a momma who loves her wine but we also stan a momma who knows when she has a problem. All the character arcs in this book are G O L D! The one that makes me the happiest is seeing Chrissy able to sprout rainbow wings and accept her son and son-in-law.
I really loved this book. I am so happy I was one of the lucky people to read it early. Byron does a great job of teaching us about the LGBTQIA community yet keeping the story light and hilarious with his outrageous characters like Victoria and Paw Paw.
I am vowing right now to have a squirrel loving soul like Paw Paw and I will be going onto Amazon to find a picnic table for the fur buddies in my neighborhood.
Thank you Henry Holy & Company for the early copy of "Big Gay Wedding." You can get your copy of Byron Lane's latest right now and I highly recommend it!
But who gave Byron Lane permission to break my heart and then sew it back up by the end of this book. I will be sending you my therapy bill this month. It will always break my soul into a billion pieces reading about parents who cannot love their children because they're part of the LGBTQIA community. My eyes welled with tears when I read Barnett's mom and dad not fully accepting him and him pretending to be what he's not his entire life living on the farm.
This is a harsh reality that a lot of us can't understand. That's why I read books like "Big Gay Wedding" so I can step into someone else's shoes and understand what my neighbors experience. I consider myself an ally. I want to continue to learn. I want to help make life better for everyone around me. I hope that by reading and educating myself I can learn myself of to communicate and open my mind + heart more!
I am so glad I got to read this book. Its all Schitt's Creek vibes all day. Victoria could have walked right off the set of that show. I adored Ezra's mom. She was over the top. She was hilarious. I thrived when I got to read from her point of view. We stan a momma who loves her wine but we also stan a momma who knows when she has a problem. All the character arcs in this book are G O L D! The one that makes me the happiest is seeing Chrissy able to sprout rainbow wings and accept her son and son-in-law.
I really loved this book. I am so happy I was one of the lucky people to read it early. Byron does a great job of teaching us about the LGBTQIA community yet keeping the story light and hilarious with his outrageous characters like Victoria and Paw Paw.
I am vowing right now to have a squirrel loving soul like Paw Paw and I will be going onto Amazon to find a picnic table for the fur buddies in my neighborhood.
Thank you Henry Holy & Company for the early copy of "Big Gay Wedding." You can get your copy of Byron Lane's latest right now and I highly recommend it!
July 2, 2023
I’m conflicted about this one. It’s kind of sweet and kind of not. The mom, Chrissy, is someone we are supposed to root for, but she spends a lot of the book stewing in and defending her homophobia and that’s not particularly humorous, mostly just over the top. And so many things are over the top, from the dialogue (so much shouting!) to the one-note characters who come across like caricatures. I wished for more connection and humor. Only one scene (the initial scene of Paw Paw at the nursing home) made me laugh. Also, the bits with the animals and the afterlife are too much. Overall, it’s a predictable, overplayed, feel-good-ish read that might work well for some readers. Do be aware that homophobia in a small town is a persistent theme throughout, even if it’s cloaked in attempted humor.
October 21, 2023
This did not work for me. The beginning was all over the place, I had no idea what was going on, the narrator (not the literal audio narrator but the character himself) was saying a lot of words, but no clue what he said. It wasn't building up to a point, at least it didn't feel that way.
I did listen to the audio, I gave this every effort but I couldn't take it. I was confused and because of that didn't care what happened. I think if I had Rea the book instead of the audio, it could have worked better. I may give the ebook a try someday.
1 dnf star
I did listen to the audio, I gave this every effort but I couldn't take it. I was confused and because of that didn't care what happened. I think if I had Rea the book instead of the audio, it could have worked better. I may give the ebook a try someday.
1 dnf star
December 28, 2023
This book is 40 years too late if you expect me to me to root for a deeply homophobic main character trying to wrap their heads around their kid's queerness. I don't have any empathy left for people who love their children conditionally and intentionally hurt them with willful ignorance.
Also, the Schitts Creek comparison was a stretch. Sure, this story also takes place in the middle of nowhere, but the book isn't witty, nor is it as open to diversity as the show.
Also, the Schitts Creek comparison was a stretch. Sure, this story also takes place in the middle of nowhere, but the book isn't witty, nor is it as open to diversity as the show.
June 25, 2024
3.5 stars
Elaine the sheep, I love you so much ❤️
Full RTC
Elaine the sheep, I love you so much ❤️
Full RTC
June 10, 2023
I really wanted to like this book. Based on the more positive reviews, I was hoping it would be light, fun, and occasionally funny. It was dull, over the top, and interminable. I could have put it down at any moment and not cared. I don’t mind big, broad characters, but there is an art to making them believable and not cartoonish. Ezra’s mother and sister are two of the worst examples of this offense. The storyline of Elaine the sheep just made the whole thing a muddled mess.
June 12, 2023
Listen to Byron Lane on the Book Gang Podcast NOW! Big Gay Wedding is on store shelves now- thank you to the publisher for the review copy for our show.
****
Byron Lane, the author of A Star is Bored, is back with a charming rom-com perfect for your summer book stacks.
Chrissy runs the Polite Society Ranch, a small Louisiana farm that offers school tours teaching lessons on manners through the joy of rescued animal encounters. All is well as long as things remain polite and disciplined.
But when Barnett, her son, returns home, she finds her disciplined world rocked. Not only is he gay, but he plans to marry his partner Ezra.
As Chrissy controls her response with good manners, she uncomfortably weathers this blow to her son's imagined life with a wife, and in these moments, Lane's writing shines.
In one memorable scene, Chrissy observes, "Is it crazy that we can live with the mystery of God?" Or the mystery of Wi-Fi or something? But the first time we don't understand another human being, the mystery of another human being, it's just too much to overcome?"
These shifts in thought are charmingly written when Chrissy scribbles all the things Ezra isn't "politely" into a notebook and then realizes how much she later delights in them. It's also more significant, like navigating small-town feedback and how her priest views Barnett's life.
Chrissy doesn’t have to weather these challenges alone, though. Among the most supportive is Barnett's Paw-Paw, a memorable and delightful character for a reader. His surprising acceptance borderlines on comical as he admits how many gay grandkids come to visit at his assisted living facility and how the Glee marathons reinforce these lessons of acceptance in his community lounge.
As the rest of the town tries to grapple with gay marriage, Lane isn't afraid to let the nuptials get over the top through a cast of quirky side characters as they throw a "big gay wedding" at Chrissy's ranch.
It would be hard to replicate the charm of Lane's debut simply because it was based so much upon his personal experience as Carrie Fisher's assistant. However, you can see Lane's confident writing in the relationship he knows best- the one between Ezra & Barnett.
In many ways, the romance sections reminded me of Katherine Center's writing as we catch glimmers of these private and meaningful moments that still leave a lot to our imaginations.
The "countdown to damnation" for the wedding timeline and interspersing advice from a polite society guide on Southern Nuptials in the early 1900s reinforce the story well.
I'm so excited to share the microphone with Byron and hear more about how his love story and his characters intertwine.
****
Byron Lane, the author of A Star is Bored, is back with a charming rom-com perfect for your summer book stacks.
Chrissy runs the Polite Society Ranch, a small Louisiana farm that offers school tours teaching lessons on manners through the joy of rescued animal encounters. All is well as long as things remain polite and disciplined.
But when Barnett, her son, returns home, she finds her disciplined world rocked. Not only is he gay, but he plans to marry his partner Ezra.
As Chrissy controls her response with good manners, she uncomfortably weathers this blow to her son's imagined life with a wife, and in these moments, Lane's writing shines.
In one memorable scene, Chrissy observes, "Is it crazy that we can live with the mystery of God?" Or the mystery of Wi-Fi or something? But the first time we don't understand another human being, the mystery of another human being, it's just too much to overcome?"
These shifts in thought are charmingly written when Chrissy scribbles all the things Ezra isn't "politely" into a notebook and then realizes how much she later delights in them. It's also more significant, like navigating small-town feedback and how her priest views Barnett's life.
Chrissy doesn’t have to weather these challenges alone, though. Among the most supportive is Barnett's Paw-Paw, a memorable and delightful character for a reader. His surprising acceptance borderlines on comical as he admits how many gay grandkids come to visit at his assisted living facility and how the Glee marathons reinforce these lessons of acceptance in his community lounge.
As the rest of the town tries to grapple with gay marriage, Lane isn't afraid to let the nuptials get over the top through a cast of quirky side characters as they throw a "big gay wedding" at Chrissy's ranch.
It would be hard to replicate the charm of Lane's debut simply because it was based so much upon his personal experience as Carrie Fisher's assistant. However, you can see Lane's confident writing in the relationship he knows best- the one between Ezra & Barnett.
In many ways, the romance sections reminded me of Katherine Center's writing as we catch glimmers of these private and meaningful moments that still leave a lot to our imaginations.
The "countdown to damnation" for the wedding timeline and interspersing advice from a polite society guide on Southern Nuptials in the early 1900s reinforce the story well.
I'm so excited to share the microphone with Byron and hear more about how his love story and his characters intertwine.
May 15, 2023
Won via goodreads giveaways. All my opinions are my own.
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3.5 stars 🌟
A warm hug of a novel.. it may frustrate you in the beginning but it won me over quickly and I was rooting for everyone in here.
This one had me smiling, laughing, cursing certain people, and tears near the end .
Just what I needed at the moment:)
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3.5 stars 🌟
A warm hug of a novel.. it may frustrate you in the beginning but it won me over quickly and I was rooting for everyone in here.
This one had me smiling, laughing, cursing certain people, and tears near the end .
Just what I needed at the moment:)
June 19, 2023
fucking loved this book so much and will be recommending it to everyone moving forward. laughed. cried. felt all of the feels. it was incredible!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!
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