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A Recipe for More: Ingredients for a Life of Abundance and Ease
“This is more than a It’s a way of being.”—J . Wortham, staff writer for the New York Times Magazine and cohost of the New York Times podcast
“Deeply honest, compassionate, and wise . . . A Recipe for More is a generous book about breaking cycles of suffering, but also choosing pleasure, offering kindness to self, cultivating an electric network of friendships, and embracing this sweet life. I treasured every page.”—Janelle Monáe, singer, actor, artist, and New York Times bestselling author of The Memory Librarian
"Each new day is a singular moment, a singular opportunity. No day is like the last and no day is like what’s to come. We have arrived, and we are simultaneously arriving.”
In this expansive debut, A Recipe for Choosing a Life of Pleasure and Abundance, creative, host, and "pleasure doula" Sara Elise offers a profound and challenging inquiry into the forces that keep us in a state of survival and limitation and asks us to consider a new way to live. Sara Elise leaves us with what it means to be present to what’s unfolding around us and open to the change that is possible in that empty space.
A Recipe for More is a quest to examine the ingredients of our lives, those essential components that make up our days. Have we chosen rest, breath, movement, agency, visibility, play, and pleasure? Or are we trapped in the numbing and violent pattern of self-inflicted suffering? Do we celebrate the unique and precious wiring of our brains? Are our relationships a garden of ever-growing and evolving roots? Do we nourish our bodies with what it requires to sense and receive? Are we liberated, awakened, and alive? In the tradition of Adrienne Maree Brown and Sonya Renee Taylor, A Recipe for More is a radical argument for dismantling the systems that oppress us. But it begins with the individual, and the simple recipe of our every day.
Groundbreaking, persuasive, inclusive, and warm, A Recipe for More brings the ingredients of an abundant life to all readers so that we might honor ourselves, deepen our communities, and finally be present in each miraculous and life-giving singular moment.
With contributions by Fariha Róisín, Tourmaline, Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, Ryann Holmes (bklyn boihood), Naima Green, J Wortham, and more.
“Deeply honest, compassionate, and wise . . . A Recipe for More is a generous book about breaking cycles of suffering, but also choosing pleasure, offering kindness to self, cultivating an electric network of friendships, and embracing this sweet life. I treasured every page.”—Janelle Monáe, singer, actor, artist, and New York Times bestselling author of The Memory Librarian
"Each new day is a singular moment, a singular opportunity. No day is like the last and no day is like what’s to come. We have arrived, and we are simultaneously arriving.”
In this expansive debut, A Recipe for Choosing a Life of Pleasure and Abundance, creative, host, and "pleasure doula" Sara Elise offers a profound and challenging inquiry into the forces that keep us in a state of survival and limitation and asks us to consider a new way to live. Sara Elise leaves us with what it means to be present to what’s unfolding around us and open to the change that is possible in that empty space.
A Recipe for More is a quest to examine the ingredients of our lives, those essential components that make up our days. Have we chosen rest, breath, movement, agency, visibility, play, and pleasure? Or are we trapped in the numbing and violent pattern of self-inflicted suffering? Do we celebrate the unique and precious wiring of our brains? Are our relationships a garden of ever-growing and evolving roots? Do we nourish our bodies with what it requires to sense and receive? Are we liberated, awakened, and alive? In the tradition of Adrienne Maree Brown and Sonya Renee Taylor, A Recipe for More is a radical argument for dismantling the systems that oppress us. But it begins with the individual, and the simple recipe of our every day.
Groundbreaking, persuasive, inclusive, and warm, A Recipe for More brings the ingredients of an abundant life to all readers so that we might honor ourselves, deepen our communities, and finally be present in each miraculous and life-giving singular moment.
With contributions by Fariha Róisín, Tourmaline, Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, Ryann Holmes (bklyn boihood), Naima Green, J Wortham, and more.
- GenresNonfictionSelf Help
239 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 2, 2023
30 people are currently reading
467 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
April 13, 2023
Before writing this review, I reread the book summary to determine if I missed some nuances regarding the author and the content. I discovered I had not. My concern stemmed from the fact that this book’s category was listed as “Health, Mind and Body/Self-Help.” It is that but it also has the feeling of a memoir due to the first-person perspective and the extensive use of the author’s subjective experiences.
I was touched by the dedication, which addresses the universal need to belong, and I thought this would set the tone for the book. Subsequently, in the opening chapter, the author describes herself as “a Black & Indigenous, autistic, queer, femme woman,” which heightened my curiosity about the content. Any one of these qualities could marginalize an individual in our society, yet she succeeded through her strength of character and spirit. However, the further I read, I found her self-described identity and its associated issues overshadowing the core message about living an authentic, pleasurable life. I felt compassion, admiration, and respect, but I found it difficult to relate to the material based on my own cultural background. After reading about half the book, I began skimming the remaining chapters due to the verbosity and emphasis on the author’s unique circumstances.
I admire the author’s courage and transparency in sharing her journey and fully support the premise of living a fulfilling life that expresses each person’s unique creative gifts. Her self-help suggestions are highlighted by the chapter titles ranging from transcending the “busy-ness” of our cultural imperative to achieve, to cultivating pleasure, to using fear and rage as catalysts for change. These are illuminating, if basic, in their scope and depth, raising critical social issues for thoughtful contemplation and action on both the personal and collective levels.
I am confident there is an audience that will embrace this book, finding it both inspiring and supportive. However, I did not resonate with it in the way I anticipated when I selected this book based on the summary.
My thanks to the author, the publisher, and NetGalley for the privilege of reviewing this book. The opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.
This review is being posted immediately to my GoodReads account and will be posted on Amazon upon publication.
I was touched by the dedication, which addresses the universal need to belong, and I thought this would set the tone for the book. Subsequently, in the opening chapter, the author describes herself as “a Black & Indigenous, autistic, queer, femme woman,” which heightened my curiosity about the content. Any one of these qualities could marginalize an individual in our society, yet she succeeded through her strength of character and spirit. However, the further I read, I found her self-described identity and its associated issues overshadowing the core message about living an authentic, pleasurable life. I felt compassion, admiration, and respect, but I found it difficult to relate to the material based on my own cultural background. After reading about half the book, I began skimming the remaining chapters due to the verbosity and emphasis on the author’s unique circumstances.
I admire the author’s courage and transparency in sharing her journey and fully support the premise of living a fulfilling life that expresses each person’s unique creative gifts. Her self-help suggestions are highlighted by the chapter titles ranging from transcending the “busy-ness” of our cultural imperative to achieve, to cultivating pleasure, to using fear and rage as catalysts for change. These are illuminating, if basic, in their scope and depth, raising critical social issues for thoughtful contemplation and action on both the personal and collective levels.
I am confident there is an audience that will embrace this book, finding it both inspiring and supportive. However, I did not resonate with it in the way I anticipated when I selected this book based on the summary.
My thanks to the author, the publisher, and NetGalley for the privilege of reviewing this book. The opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.
This review is being posted immediately to my GoodReads account and will be posted on Amazon upon publication.
July 31, 2023
So Satiating! A garden full of decadent ideas.
This reflective, heart opening story holds all the ingredients for a nourishing, tearful read. A Recipe for More is a golden hour invitation to sit down with ourselves and center pleasure in our amorphous, quivering earthly lives.
Sara invites us to gently investigate and (at times) fervently pry apart the fibrous ideas that uphold unhelpful, rigid narratives of the self. She encourages us to imagine our existence without shame and suffering ; to locate and unlearn repetitive pain points, to evaluate our open wounds, and dedicate space for our bodies and brains to react authentically to an overstimulating world.
She intentionally revels in slower, more restful and an ever-evolving ways of being, enriched by self-affirming habits, communal care and abundant love.
A Recipe for More reminded me that joy and juiciness lives deeply in my joints and is woven throughout queer black experience; It is up to us to crack, massage and express this pleasure as it serves our lives.
This reflective, heart opening story holds all the ingredients for a nourishing, tearful read. A Recipe for More is a golden hour invitation to sit down with ourselves and center pleasure in our amorphous, quivering earthly lives.
Sara invites us to gently investigate and (at times) fervently pry apart the fibrous ideas that uphold unhelpful, rigid narratives of the self. She encourages us to imagine our existence without shame and suffering ; to locate and unlearn repetitive pain points, to evaluate our open wounds, and dedicate space for our bodies and brains to react authentically to an overstimulating world.
She intentionally revels in slower, more restful and an ever-evolving ways of being, enriched by self-affirming habits, communal care and abundant love.
A Recipe for More reminded me that joy and juiciness lives deeply in my joints and is woven throughout queer black experience; It is up to us to crack, massage and express this pleasure as it serves our lives.
November 15, 2023
the stories and teachings of indigenous black autistic femmes are sacred, and this book is full of so many reminders of why. it's an overview and an introduction to free ways of being. leaves me longing for the details.
August 10, 2023
2.5 stars rounded up - there are some beautiful ideas in here but it didn’t quite resonate with me like i’d hoped. i’m sure there are others who’d get more out of it than i did!
August 3, 2023
An abundance mindset is a pillar of Black and Indigenous cultures. Learning that my ancestors prioritized abundance certainly changed my relationship to it, because I realized that abundance is my birthright; it’s inherent to me and my lineage.Abundance is a vital currency for building community. Abundance does not exist solely within the self, but is a reciprocal and ongoing exchange with our community and environment. In Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer says that “each person, human or no, is bound to every other in a reciprocal relationship. Just as all beings have a duty to me, I have a duty to them. If an animal gives its life to feed me, I am in turn bound to support its life. If I receive a stream’s gift of pure water, then I am responsible for returning a gift in kind.” Abundance is being awake to what’s present around you.
This is a really important voice on our Earth, with wisdom and honesty gleaned from so many sources, loved seemed Robin Wall Kimmerer, Ross Gay, Diane Ackerman quoted, they are some of my teachers also. There was a lot of “I”in this, so felt more of a memoir, but still powerful. It is so important to amplify these voices and lessons.
Poet and founder of @NapMinistry Tricia Hersey, in her 2021 conversation with Brontë Velez, said, “I believe that the powers-that-be don’t want us rested, they don’t want the Earth rested—because they know that if folks rest enough, they’re going to figure it all out. . . . Keep them numb, keep them zombies, keep them on the clock. Continue to degrade their divinity. Because once they know they’re divine, they will not deal with a lot of this shit. When I say sleep helps you wake up—it helps you wake up to the fact of who ***you are.”
“Feeling good” is about treating your feelings as passing and prioritizing adjusting your inner landscape to one that’s forever open to abundance, open to observance. Author and artist Mimi Zhu shares that “I learn these lessons from the land, as I envision the ocean and its enduring moving waves, the trees and their falling leaves, and the sun as it rises and sets each day. Consider your emotions as an element of the earth: coming, being, and washing away.”
Friendship now for me feels like freedom. It feels like open space: space that I can make up as I journey deeper into it, where I can workshop my decisions, communicate my needs, be generous, take risks, express my hurt feelings, rise to the occasion, cry, be uplifted, and feel held down. I’ve learned that bonds are strengthened by asking for what you need, by allowing my friends to show up for me.
This is a really important voice on our Earth, with wisdom and honesty gleaned from so many sources, loved seemed Robin Wall Kimmerer, Ross Gay, Diane Ackerman quoted, they are some of my teachers also. There was a lot of “I”in this, so felt more of a memoir, but still powerful. It is so important to amplify these voices and lessons.
Poet and founder of @NapMinistry Tricia Hersey, in her 2021 conversation with Brontë Velez, said, “I believe that the powers-that-be don’t want us rested, they don’t want the Earth rested—because they know that if folks rest enough, they’re going to figure it all out. . . . Keep them numb, keep them zombies, keep them on the clock. Continue to degrade their divinity. Because once they know they’re divine, they will not deal with a lot of this shit. When I say sleep helps you wake up—it helps you wake up to the fact of who ***you are.”
“Feeling good” is about treating your feelings as passing and prioritizing adjusting your inner landscape to one that’s forever open to abundance, open to observance. Author and artist Mimi Zhu shares that “I learn these lessons from the land, as I envision the ocean and its enduring moving waves, the trees and their falling leaves, and the sun as it rises and sets each day. Consider your emotions as an element of the earth: coming, being, and washing away.”
Friendship now for me feels like freedom. It feels like open space: space that I can make up as I journey deeper into it, where I can workshop my decisions, communicate my needs, be generous, take risks, express my hurt feelings, rise to the occasion, cry, be uplifted, and feel held down. I’ve learned that bonds are strengthened by asking for what you need, by allowing my friends to show up for me.
May 27, 2023
At this time in my life, I really needed this book and the lessons in it. I needed the gentle reminder that life is truly a gift and I am the master of my own and I have my own unique gifts and genius that I want to access and share with the world. I am so grateful to Sara Elise for laying down a blueprint for us to face our fears, open ourselves to living in our zone of genius, and bring in abundance and ease into our lives. She has a very unique and powerful voice. She brilliantly and bravely expresses her own lived experience and calls on the experiences, thoughts, and reflections of some really amazing people from her communities’ to help create a profound and delicious recipe for more. She really digs deep and is intensely transparent in her book so that others may benefit and tap into the abundance awaiting for them. One thing that really stood out for me is that, regardless of race, ethnicity, ability, sexual orientation, gender, religion, and any other differences that we may have, there are universal truths and lessons in “A Recipe for More” that transcend our differences and can resonate with us all. I am truly grateful for this book and would highly recommend it to anyone that wants more for their life.
July 24, 2023
Surely, you have seen or heard the arguments about whether it is enabling to revisit our past. Sara Elise writes a strong answer. She writes living in the moment is very important. It is good to know that prioritizing our lives, shaking them up will not leave us feeling bored. Life can still feel happy after we have changed or discarded around a few of life's duties. Sara Elise's "recipe," leads to our "divinity." Just seeing our names written beside 'divinity' might cause hiccups or some other reaction. Mainly, this self help book will not cause you to feel tense, guilty or fearful. Really, There is so much exciting information in " A Recipe for more. "
July 14, 2023
Sara Elise is very honest and open in her philosophical book.
Her recipe for a happier life entails refusing to conform to what is expected in a patriarchal, ablest, Eurocentric, materialistic society.
She suggests asking oneself what one really wants, and is your current lifestyle giving you that. She shares ways she has been successful in getting a life she wants and it is a positive read.
She cites a lot of thinkers, artists, musicians and poets.
I would recommend this book for people who care about their life journey.
Her recipe for a happier life entails refusing to conform to what is expected in a patriarchal, ablest, Eurocentric, materialistic society.
She suggests asking oneself what one really wants, and is your current lifestyle giving you that. She shares ways she has been successful in getting a life she wants and it is a positive read.
She cites a lot of thinkers, artists, musicians and poets.
I would recommend this book for people who care about their life journey.
July 19, 2023
"A Recipe for More" is a persuasive and heartfelt guide, drawing valuable life lessons from the author's personal struggles. Although the pacing felt slow and the text overwhelming due to minimal white space, the book still inspires readers to embrace self-honoring practices and live an abundant life. Thanks to Netgalley, the author, and the publisher for this opportunity to read and review this transformative work.
July 28, 2023
I LOVE this book: as someone who is looking for ways to grow deeper into my authenticity, to bring my dreams manifest, and to see a world that works for everyone. The personal stories she tells were honest and relatable, and there were so many helpful reframings that I have immediately been bringing into my own life. I recommend this to everyone who is looking to come home to themselves and actually BE the revolution we are desperately seeking and need.
December 2, 2024
I stumbled upon this book while at the author’s wellness coffee shop in Brooklyn. A Recipe for More is an important semi-memoir of a self-described Black & Indigenous, autistic, poly queer femme working to live life to the fullest, with beautiful guest excerpts from other healers and thinkers. Would recommend if you are in search of this sort of perspective!
June 4, 2024
There was nothing wrong with the writing or the book. But I was not the target audience for this. I started this book 3 times and struggled to finish it. Maybe it’s not the right time in my life for me to read it.
October 9, 2025
3.5 stars rounded up to 4. The book started out great with a unique perspective that I appreciate. However, when reading the friendship chapter, I became more and more disinterested and found myself skipping over words and sections as it became redundant. Overall, it was alright.
March 11, 2024
Good book with a serious story. I read this one all in one day and the book will stay with you for a while.
March 4, 2025
3.5 stars! I’m a self-help skeptic but there were plenty of ideas I’m going to keep thinking about.
August 20, 2025
inspiring, motivating, enjoyable read
August 16, 2023
Loved her moments of sharing specific stories and reflections from her life. I also loved the focus on community and fostering beautiful, deep connections.
June 7, 2024
This was interesting! I appreciated the author’s perspective on interpersonal communications. I thought her hedonistic approach to life was fun to read about, though not relatable.
I first heard her on a podcast and really enjoyed what she had to say about being childfree, so that’s what prompted me to pick this up.
I first heard her on a podcast and really enjoyed what she had to say about being childfree, so that’s what prompted me to pick this up.
July 13, 2023
A Recipe for More by Sara Elise is such a special book. I know I will be recommending this book medicine often. Sara Elise writes about being a Black creative who is neurodivergent, autistic, polyamorous and more. Beyond any label she is living her best life and she shares her journey towards self-possession. She holds nothing back about how to live a more authentic life and how to do so in community with your people. I loved the community approach to writing this book with contributions from Sara's circle of support as well. Bravo!
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews