The Courage To Be Courageous: A memoir of struggle, success, and truth

by Dan Bolen, Landon J Napoleon

“Affectingly honest… A provocative memoir, refreshingly candid and thoughtful.”
—Kirkus Reviews

By age 7 “Danny” Bolen knew he was different.

This was a perilous reality in the post-war years of 1950s America. Although a time of widespread economic prosperity and great technological advances, it was also an era of silent oppression, racial segregation, and real danger for anyone who fell outside of society’s legally allowed norms.

Dan married a girl in white go-go boots, dropped out of college to become a Jehovah’s Witness minister, and discovered he had a gift for employment recruiting that would make him a millionaire before turning 30 (something his Grandma Vera accurately predicted).

Lovingly told, with stark transparency and dry wit and humor, The Courage To Be Courageous is an important book about confronting our struggles, finding our success, and most importantly, stepping into our truth and embracing who we are each meant to be.
DAN BOLEN was born in 1947, in Spokane, Washington, and grew up in Boise, Idaho, and in several places in Alaska. After marrying a girl in white go-go boots and dropping out of college to become a Jehovah’s Witness minister, he discovered he had a gift for employment recruiting, a passion that would propel him to great professional and financial success. From 1967 until 2019 he helmed the nationally recognized executive search firms Management Recruiters of Boise and Dan Bolen and Associates. This is his first book.

LANDON J. NAPOLEON is the award-winning and critically acclaimed author of fiction and nonfiction books that have been translated into multiple foreign editions. He is a previous Barnes & Noble “Discover Great New Writers” finalist and a Kirkus Reviews “Best of 2021” recipient. His debut novel ZigZag was adapted into a film, and his nonfiction biography Burning The Jason Schechterle Story was an “Arizona Republic Recommends” selection. He has a bachelor’s degree in journalism from Arizona State University and a master’s degree in creative writing from University of Glasgow in Scotland. He lives in Arizona.

225 pages, Kindle Edition

Published August 7, 2022

Reviews

[Mike Triggs · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Courage To Be Courageous: A memoir of struggle, success, and truth by Dan Bolen is a tragic tale of one mans struggle to find his true self while being ensnared in the grips of the Jehovah's Witness cult.

For 70 years Bolen was the epitome of a deeply religious man, highly successful in his business, a devoted son, husband and father but he had a closely guarded secret - he was attracted to other men.

I must admit I knew very little about the Jehovah's Witness faith before reading this eye opening book. Sure I had heard it referred to a religious cult, but the same has been said for Christian Science, Seventh Day Adventists, Mormons and even Roman Catholics at one time or another.

Bolen clearly describes the iron grip his church held on him throughout both of his marriages, his being disfellowshipped multiple times, (similar to being excommunicated in other religions) shunning by family members and others in his faith group and the church's refusal to allow him to marry a second time after his divorce to his first wife.

As a gay man who also struggled to accept my own sexuality I have much respect for the courage it took for this writer to learn to love the man he saw in the mirror each morning. He truly was courageous and the title of the book became very clear by the end of the read. I only wish he had the courage to have done it sooner and not waited for 70 years to do it. But like they say, 70 is the new 50 and my only hope is that Dan has a long life ahead of him.

[Debbie Lanthorn · Rating 1 out of 5]

I’m sure much of what Dan wrote in this book he believes to be true. And up until he met my parents and sister, I can’t speak to whether it is or not. But let me introduce myself, I am the sister of Sandy and the daughter of the Ray and Ellin in the book. I won’t sit here and refute line by line what he twisted in the book. I do know that my parents would be rolling over in their graves to know what he has said and done to my sister, Sandy. Who by the way has never been “fat” a day in her life. I am no longer a JW myself although not DF’d so I have a comprehensive understanding of the religion and its ins and outs. Dan misled Sandy and broke her heart knowing who he was from the beginning. He admits in the book that he knew from a very young age, seven?,that he was “different”. He had her sign a prenup. To me you don’t do that if you don’t intend on using it at some point. Jehovah witnesses don’t believe in divorce. I have nothing against Dan being gay, but I have everything against him for the hurting of my little sister. And to write about my parents in a book that they had no choice about, to talk about them and our family and my sister publicly is totally the opposite of everything they epitomized. Grace, class, strength, humility. You, Dan, may be rich materially, but you lack Ray,Ellin and Sandy’s qualities.