How The Light Gets In

by Keira Shae

In the bosom of Happy Utah Valley, Keira Shae and her family weren't like everybody else. Their home was filthy, their mother was absent, and their cupboards were bare. What began as a disadvantaged existence quickly crumbled as Keira and her siblings grew up under the terror, abuse, and drug culture that their mother brought into the home. The only thing more incredible than their story of survival are the powers that transformed Keira's fears into love, kindness, and resilience. How The Light Gets In is the true story of a girl who went from an impoverished prostitute's daughter to an educated, loved, and empowered woman, wife, and mother. "The engaging and powerful Keira Shae writes a memoir which is both a warm embrace and a slap in the face. Keira’s writing evinces the burgeoning strength and humility of a true survivor—rising like a phoenix from an abusive past. Keira’s ability to radically love breathes a spirit of redemption into an autobiography filled with rape, prostitution, sexual and physical assault, addiction, and mental illness… the result is a tale filled with sorrow, anger, and compassion—a veritable rollercoaster." --Heather Harris Bergevin, author of Lawless Women "Equal parts empowering and shocking, Scholz helps us hear the silent suffering of innocent children hidden just beyond our view. It's inspiring to see a well-honed writer invite us into the reaches of her heart. From a truly traumatic past to a promising future, Scholz's story is a reminder to search for the divine within ourselves and each other." --Julie Nelson, author of Parenting with Spiritual Power

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

268 pages, Paperback

Published June 1, 2022

Reviews

[Michael Austin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am giving this book five stars only because ten is not an option, and even then, I would try to take it to eleven. It is that good. If you liked Tara Westover's Educated, you will be amazed beyond belief by Keira Shae's How the Light Gets In. Even if you didn't like Educated you will love this book. It is an amazing story by an amazing person whose voice should be an absolutely essential part of our national dialogue.

Keira Shae was born in Provo Utah, a land famous for happy families, clean living, and Brigham Young University. "The sordid underbelly of Provo" sounds like the setup to a joke. But it isn't. There is actually a sordid underbelly in Provo, and Keria experienced it from the day she was born. Her mother went from unwed mother to prostitute to part of the drug trade while she was in her adolescence. Keira experienced sexual abuse, profound poverty, a parade of her mother's boyfriends and clients, and a life that normalized things that most people would find unbelievable.

But also she had hope, and that is what the story is about. The title comes from a line in Leonard Cohen's "Anthem: "There is a crack in everything / That's how the light gets in." We see the cracks in Keira's life, but we also see the light, bountifully and exuberantly rendered in the form of allies who come at unexpected times, human goodness, and a young girl who refuses to be defined by her circumstances.

Keira's story is an act of grace, and her ability to tell it is a gift to her readers for which I will always be grateful. A truly remarkable book.

[Amber Spencer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Where this story takes you - from anger and hatred, to forgiveness and love - is powerful. And a story of hope for many. In the end, it’s our choices and what feelings we allow into our lives that shape us, even through horrible situations. The outlook on life and love and the letter to the American Taxpayers were some of my favorite parts.

[MP | young adult library · Rating 5 out of 5]

Keira's story is remarkable. I constantly found myself wishing to hold her and hug her - both as a child and as an adult. She has been through so much and is so wise in her reflections. She acknowledges how her traumatic childhood still impacts her today, but she seems to have found peace. Her words remind me to love those around me, prioritize myself for their benefit, and to be in charge of my relationship with God.
I love this memoir - the pain, the happiness, and the change. It is all good and Keira shows just how difficult it can be to be human, but why it's worth it.

Not only that, but she is a beautiful writer. Her words are poetic and I just couldn't get enough.

[Susan Jane · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a raw and emotional story. I feel like my heart is still aching from reading it. Such a great memoir of a girl who went through more then I can even imagine, and despite all of it became a very successful woman and mother. There is some language in the abridged version, and I have been told there’s a lot in the unabridged version, just a little FYI.

[Betsy · Rating 3 out of 5]

It shows my privilege that the details of this book were shocking.

Keira experienced abuse, neglect, hunger, violence, and instability as she grew up, due to the life choices, mental illness, and drug addiction of her mother. But as an adult, Keira has chosen to react to life with love and grace. She is inspiring.

Note some language.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was an emotional ride from beginning to end. It wasn't as graphic or harsh as I expected, for which I am grateful. The author's journey is both horrifying and inspiring. I found the letter she wrote to the American taxpayers that's included at the end to be particularly powerful, especially since I read this book in February 2026 as the federal government is destroying the social safety net.

[Vickie Richey · Rating 4 out of 5]

A memoir about growing up in an utterly dysfunctional "family" in Utah county. Keira is strong and courageous as she struggles with daily life, hunger, moving dozens of times, changing schools, friends, foster care, courts, religion, heartache, forgiveness. God sent her answers and angels, although she didn't recognize it because she's in survival mode. Her difficult childhood consisted her completely unstable home life while supporting her younger siblings emotionally and physically. Reading this made me realize: Right here, under our noses are children neglected, abused, suffering. How I would love to rescue them all! Thankfully, she not only survives, she thrives. What a story!

[Will · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is powerful; it’s a book about survival and overcoming great odds. It is a book about forgiving yourself and others.

[Segullah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Keira Shae references Cohen’s iconic lyrics in the title of her new memoir, How the Light Gets In, recently published through By Common Consent Press, which vividly details her unorthodox Utah upbringing.

With a meth-addicted prostitute mother with bipolar disorder, little food and never enough money, and four younger siblings who depend on Keira to meet their basic needs, her story reveals a vastly different side of Orem and Provo from the wholesome University town/suburban landscape most native Utahns or BYU graduates may remember. It’s a tale of enduring hardships wrought by the addictions, mental illness, and limitations of the adults whose flawed choices compelled children to protect each other and fend for themselves.

Keira writes the memoir under her first and middle names, explaining that her last name changed at the whim of her mother’s relationships. There was no continuity of family or identity. “Can you hear me sigh? My life is exhausting. I don’t really know who I am,” she begins. Her narrative of abuse is raw, detailed, and linear. It feels intimate, as though she has pulled up a chair and sits facing her reader, knee to knee, relating a chronological account beginning in early childhood and ending with her adult life. Reading parts of Keira’s life story was actually physically painful for me, a memoir-obsessed reader, because of the unvarnished, intentional cruelty she and her siblings faced again and again...

to read the rest of this review, please visit us at https://segullah.org/book-review/book...

[Alison · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t dish out 5 star book reviews very often, but this book certainly earned it. If you loved “The Glass Castle” or “Educated”, or stories of people rising up in the face of overwhelming odds, then this is a must read.

Normally my “reviews” are just notes to my future self about my experience with each book. This one came to my life in a roundabout way. I read a viral Facebook post once that touched me deeply despite it’s short length. It was from a young woman thanking the American taxpayers for keeping her alive as a child. To paraphrase, she said that because of the free lunches, schools to learn in and healthcare she was able to make it to adulthood when the parents in her life wouldn’t care for her. A few years later I was lucky enough to cross paths on the internet with her (Keira) and was excited to find out that she wrote a book! I saved it as my special beach week read, and boy... did I ever feel all the feels. I wanted to reach in and smack her mom so many times, and just take the kids in the story out of the horrific situations. It also takes place in my own community, and while I know that bad things happen here, it has given me a stronger desire to find ways to help others locally who may be suffering in any way.

Maybe it spoils my clout as a non-biased 5 star giver to say that I was lucky enough to meet up with Keira over lunch when I was able to deliver a pottery order to her. She is one of the most authentic and fascinating human beings I have had the pleasure to meet. I’m rooting for her big time! But even if I didn’t know her, 5 stars for sure.

[Melissa Juarez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brave, powerful, honest, and raw

This memoir was fascinating and disturbing. I’m glad Keira Shae was brave enough to tell her story. It’s truly incredible what she endured and had to overcome, and I appreciated the honesty with which she dealt with the complexities of being severely neglected and abused by someone who is supposed to love and care for you. I couldn’t put this book down. It’s a good reminder that we don’t always know the silent struggles of others, and that it’s ok to not be ok. I highly recommend this to everyone—although it may be triggering for victims of assault and abuse. I found it very cathartic and it allowed me to honor her story and experience the hope and despair that has shaped her life. If you’re looking for a powerful, meaningful story that will help you to develop a new level of empathy for everyone around you, this is definitely the book for you.

[Josh Higham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Compelling, traumatic read. As a memoir, I'd give the book 5 stars, but as a social commentary, which it also is, only 3. The author describes her mother's shortcomings in great detail, which illustrate the depths of her feelings and trauma, but only at the very end of the book does she acknowledge that her mother was primarily a product of her bleak circumstances, rather than willfully evil. It's a hard balance to strike and I think the author often finds that balance, but I didn't like the way she frequently criticizes her mother's weight, for example.

I worked with Utah's dept of child and family services for several years, and I saw many of the children I knew in Keira's story. My heart breaks for her and them, and I see this book primarily as a call to action, although for the author it is primarily a tool to process and make meaning from her childhood trauma. The book means something different to me, in my privilege, than it does to her.

[Kira Morris · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the first book I've read in a while and it did not disappoint! I really enjoy these type of books because they always help me put perspective on my own life. If you are the type of reader that enjoys and doesn't get too sad over emotional stories this book is for you. Not only will you gain a better grasp of the reality of so many children in foster care system, but you will be softened by the powerful message of forgiveness and moving forward in life.

My favorite parts were actually some of the authors darkest moments. In those moments the raw honesty and questioning of God you see a beautiful transformation occur. It's not every day that you will come across entertaining literature WITH a message. God truly cares about ALL his children and we must learn to look for him. If we do our lives will be greatly changed and for the better.

5 stars

[Exponent II · Rating 5 out of 5]

Why does evil exist? Why is there human suffering? I’ve always wondered these things my whole life. As a teenager I was very concerned about the state of the world (and still am) and have realized that even though bad things happen, sometimes positive stories come out of those bad situations and people are made stronger.

This book is like that. It’s about Keira Shae and the struggles and abuse she faced while growing up. I was a bit hesitant to read this book, since I dislike stories about abuse and similar things, (there’s already so much evil and suffering in the world) but it sounded like the book would end positively, so I started reading it.

To continue reading: https://www.the-exponent.com/book-rev...

[Annie Coppock · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely required reading! Especially if you grew up safe and privileged. For anyone who has a heart or anyone who looks down their nose (which one are you? I think most of us tend to be both).
If you have lived any part of this, you are not alone. If you haven’t, it is all around you and you need to understand it from the inside.
Skip to the last chapter “Dear American Taxpayers” for a unique perspective if you’re the sort that reads the last page first.
I could not love this title any more than I do. And this book won my heart (and stirred my tears) in the very first paragraph of the acknowledgments.

[Jessica · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm having a hard time reviewing this one! I think the reason why I've landed on 2 stars vs. 3, is because I didn't think the ending had very much "light" -- which is kind of the whole construct for the memoir. I thought there were more instances of light in the telling of the story than in the end of it. I finished with more of a sense of desolation than I did while reading her harrowing story. I'll give it another 1/2 star for being a compelling read.

[Marilyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Keira Shae has written a powerful memoir, a story of survival against terrible odds. Living with a mother - abusive, drug-addicted, prostitute -- and a succession of her mother's men, husbands and not -- how could Keira have survived? And yet, she did. In fact, she became a grounded, loved and loving, educated wife, mother, advocate. For those who appreciated Educated and The Glass Castle, add this to your reading list. (Violence, strong language, and a few editing errors.)

[Sara Snarr · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a stunning biography of a girl raised by a mentally ill meth addict in Provo Utah. Shae's clear honest voice is inspiring and her writing is textured and rich. She has done a wonderful job with her first book! I hope she continues writing.
I did see a few typos that small press BCC missed in the editing process. Otherwise five stars.

[Christopher Angulo · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm not a big memoir person, but this one held my attention. My wife and I talked about it for a couple of nights after we both finished it. The book is disturbing, but it is supposed to be. It is also faith-promoting. It was a good balance.

[Anna Bechyne · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a gripping story of life with a druggie, prostitute for a mother who goes through men like socks, and her survival through it all. From the moment I picked up the book I couldn’t put it down.

[conor · Rating 4 out of 5]

A powerful, devastating story of resilience in the darkest moments. Keira finds grace and light in the cracks of that darkness and shines that grace back around on those that may seem least deserving of it. Stunning and merciful and powerful.

[Angela · Rating 2 out of 5]

My favorite thing about this book is the thank you letter at the end to the taxpayers who provided schools, WIC, foster parents, and all the other resources that enabled the author to survive her childhood.

[Daniel Bride · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Q · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

I'm not sure how to review this book. I think parts of it will stay with me.

[Zachary Matheson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I learned a lot from this book.

[Helynne · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a hard story to read, but ultimately a rewarding and inspiring saga of survival and triumph after a grueling childhood filled with poverty and abuse.. Keira Shae’s background of being born out of wedlock and growing up poor in a dysfunctional family with an abusive, drug-addicted mother and a series of step-fathers was heart-wrenching. For years, Keira and her four younger half-siblings (two sets of boy-girl twins), suffer under the physical and emotional trauma of living with a crazy, mean, drug-addicted mother, who often works as a prostitute just to be able to pay the rent. The father-figures come and go, some of them nearly as bad as the mother, some of them almost a God-send. Dan is good to the kids even as he abuses meth and other drugs with the mother. Keira’s grandmother is a solace to her sometimes, but the older woman has problems of her own. Eventually Keira’s mother is jailed, and her four half-siblings sent to live with their father in Arizona. (Where has he been all this time?) For a time, she stays with her grandfather and his live-in lady friend, but the grandpa is a crusty old so-and-so whom she neither likes nor admires. When the author is eventually sent to a foster home, she feels nothing but relief and no regrets about leaving behind her birth mother , who cried when Keira left. “I didn’t believe she was really sad. At least, she was not sad at losing me. She was probably just sad to lose control over someone—just shocked and betrayed, but I never felt for one second that I was abandoning her. She had deserted me a long time ago, and I wanted out ” (135) . . . I ‘d live under a bridge and shower at school to leave the pit of Hell she had created for me” (136). Keira stays with her kind foster mother until age 15 when her birth mother claims her back and the nightmarish lifestyle begins anew. Not wishing to give too much of the story away, I will encourage future readers to recall the title and the author’s metaphor about the hard moments of life that cause cracks in our history, but also provide a way for light to seep in. In short, the author never gives up her struggle with incredible adversity, and her triumph is inspirational. Her Appendix entitled “Dear American Taxpayers” is an eloquent essay expressing gratitude for all the life-saving programs in place in the modern United States: food stamps, government-subsidized housing, Salvation Army, sub-for-Santa programs, churches and volunteer programs such as the Children’s Justice Center, safe foster homes, etc.,— that allowed her and her siblings to survive.

[Julie Barnes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Shocking and heartbreaking story of a woman's childhood years growing up in a very dysfunctional home in Provo, UT.
How she came out on top of what she endured is incredible. Opened my eyes to what may be going on behind the scenes in the lives of children around me. Really worth the read.

[Kaylee · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I don’t search far away for God; I am God. God exists in the eyes of everyone I meet. God is in the air I breathe, the water I drink. The entire universe is permeated with love, and I am included in that love.” p. 234
“I stopped searching for the woman or man in God and started looking for the God in woman or man” p. 239

[Jenny Fuller · Rating 3 out of 5]

Around 2.5-3 on this one. It started off well for me and then kind of ebbed and flowed until the last little bit. At that point I felt like things got a little confusing and hard to follow. Her thoughts were a little disjointed it seemed. It didn't seem to flow.