The Manual: Getting Masculinity Right

by Al Stewart

Understanding what it means to be male has never been more confusing. As more male behaviour is called out for being patriarchal or toxic, how does a man navigate these waters? What does healthy masculinity even look like, and what examples are there of good men that can be followed? In Al Stewart’s new book, The Manual, he explores so many of the issues that men struggle with. The Manual is written to men, for men and about men and is one of those great books that outlines the issues but also gives practical help in how to live your life as a man who is valued by others. Al works through much of the current debate on masculinity and finds helpful advice from many experts but most importantly works through what the Bible has to say about men and how being a follower of Jesus is central to living a life the loves and serves others. A life that exhibits what healthy masculinity means. The Manual is refreshingly honest as Al works through some of his own struggles with the aim of helping others avoid similar mistakes. It explores a general understanding of manhood but also drills down into what it means to be a healthy son, workmate, friend, singleman, husband and father. Al makes no bones about his belief in Jesus and the central role his faith has in making him a better man and urges other men to hear the good news of who Jesus is and the difference he makes in all walks of life.

Genres: Christian Living

264 pages, Paperback

Published July 30, 2022

About the author

There is more than one author by this name in the Goodreads data base.

Reviews

[Samuel Kassing · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the best book on a scriptural understanding of masculinity that I’ve read.

Practical and straightforward. Conversant with sociology and psychology. While being theologically grounded.

[Chloe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Al Stewart's 'The Manual' brings an intelligent and thoughtful perspective on modern debates around toxic masculinity and its alternatives. It should be essential women for every man and woman who lives in a culture of #metoo and all-masculinity-is-toxic-masculinity rhetoric and wonders what healthy manhood really looks like. Whether you're seeking to be a better man, to raise a man, or marry one, 'The Manual' is for you.

In the book, healthy masculinity is defined as 'a willingness to take responsibility and use the power you have to care for and nurture those around you' (61), and having read the book, I think there is no better definition. I even have a friend who wrote the definition on cards and gave them to his sons, so they knew what kind of men to aspire to be, and to this daughters so they would know what healthy men to look for. If I had kids, I'd probably do the same. For now, I offer my recommendation to anyone who'll listen.

Stewart draws on and debates with leading voices in the field including Australia's own Steve Biddulph, Clementine Ford, Jordan Peterson, and more, while also providing a Christian framework through which to understand what healthy masculinity is and how to put this into practice. This is what makes 'The Manual' unique from similar books on masculinity.

I assume the primary audience of the book is Christian men, however, it is a welcoming, easy-to-read, and highly accessible book to Christian women and non-Christian men and women alike. (Stewart's writing and content is so engaging that I actually had to keep myself to reading only 2 chapters a day so I could absorb the manifold wisdom in these pages.) Where Stewart draws on the gospel and explains how we can look to Jesus as the perfect example of the way masculinity was intended to be lived, he writes these examples clearly so that Christians and non-Christians alike can appreciate the examples illustrating his argument.

If you read just ONE book on masculinity, make it this one.

[Shane · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read this book together with my bible study group. I was already interested in reading it, looking at Al's thoughts on what the Bible had to say about masculinity.

The book is split in two. The first half explores what masculinity is, how our society currently thinks about it and how boys become men. The second half looks at what the Bible has to say about being a man in many different contexts (friend, workmate, husband, father etc.) and how we can live that out.

It would be fair to say I enjoyed the second half of the book significantly more than the first. I found the first half infuriating at times, as particular instances, experiences or pieces of research were broadened into sweeping statements. However, it still raised issues worth thinking about and led to some excellent conversation.

The second half was much stronger, with some solid truths from the Bible and some excellent, helpful, very honest personal reflections (that weren't claiming to be anything more than personal reflections). Some needed reminders and challenges to my own life too.

A good book to read and, even better, to discuss with another man (Christian or non-Christian).

[Timothy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have mixed feelings about this book. On the one hand, it has plenty of great instructions, encouragements, challenges that men need to hear (especially from chapter 4 onwards). In that regard, this is a good book for men, young and old. The author tells things I need to hear and be reminded of. It's the kind of things that I'd like to tell other men, especially young men. But on the other hand, I was a bit disappointed with what he says about masculinity itself. I think I was expecting something more theological when he explained what masculinity was, but the way he explains manhood/masculinity sounded pretty gender-neutral to me. I suppose I wanted to hear what was distinctive about manhood in contrast to womanhood.
In the end, this book reads like listening to an older Christian man sharing his Christian wisdom with younger men about life as a man, and that's always a good thing.

[Glenn · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 Stars - well written, well thought out book with lots of great information for today’s men… well worth a read…