Has potential, but not quite there.
I actually like Kaizerwolf’s (KW) writing style and have read his IDH series as a web novel, but there are a few consistent literary items that I really wish he would change up in his story writing and they are definitely exemplified in Combat Healer:
1. KW does a great job of getting into the story from the character’s perspective, but I sometimes feel he loses sight of the READER’s perspective. His writing is in first person and he tends to switch character views at times which is fine, but it can get annoying when rereading the same thing just because he hasn’t explained something from that character’s POV yet (ex. Explaining how ‘shit collectors’ sell to tanners and how the economics of the transaction work both from the Holstaur’s and Allister’s POV), when it’s been said once, your reader doesn’t need to reread the same explanation from another POV. It’s boring and unnecessary.
2. The character’s thoughts and internal monologue/observations are great, but I wish he would present them to the reader using better literary devices like inserting these into his character’s dialogue to give the reader the necessary information indirectly. Rather than constantly narrating, I think this could not only help him cut back on constantly talking to the reader, but allow the reader to better immerse into the story. Don’t tell me what’s happening, let the character’s SHOW me what’s happening.
3. Somewhat related to #2, sometimes there is of course no better way to explain something than to simply narrate to the reader, but I Hate when he inserts the narration right in the middle of some interesting character dialogue. By the time he’s done explaining everything, I’ve totally lost track of the conversation they were having and need to go back and reread what they were saying to follow the continuing dialogue thread.
There can be quite a bit of cringey dialogue that I wish he’d stop with too, but most of that I can generally overlook for a good story, I think the above of the more critical improvements that could really elevate KW’s storytelling to the next level.
Currently only partway through the book, I just wanted to get these thoughts down while I run into them for now and will come back to this review when I finish.