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Vampire Haiku
You hold in your hands a recently discovered poetry journal—the poetry journal of a vampire. William Butten was en route to a new land on the Mayflower when he was turned into a vampire by a fellow passenger, a beautiful woman named Katherine. These pages contain his heartbreaking story—the story of a vampire who has lived through (and perhaps caused) some of America's defining events. As he travels the country and as centuries pass, he searches for his lost love and records his adventures and misadventures using the form of poetry known as haiku.As Butten documents bloody wars, a certain tea party in Boston, living the high life during the Great Depression, two Woodstock festivals, the corruption of Emily Dickinson, and hanging out with Davy Crockett, he keeps to the classic 5-7-5 syllable structure of haiku. The resulting poems are hilarious, repulsive, oddly romantic, and bizarre.
Read along, and you just may find a new appreciation for—and insight into—various events in American history. And blood.
Read along, and you just may find a new appreciation for—and insight into—various events in American history. And blood.
137 pages, Paperback
First published August 14, 2009
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 75 reviews
July 22, 2009
somewhat disappointing. the reason the zombie one was so freaking hilarious is because zombies are these lumbering, inarticulate, limb-dropping monsters, and the thought of them, in their free time, composing elegant little haikus, makes laughter in me. vampires dont have the same contrast, so the laughter in me is smaller. i like this one though:
you would be surprised-
the amount of wooden stakes
that are in most rooms
but the design gets an a-plus...
you would be surprised-
the amount of wooden stakes
that are in most rooms
but the design gets an a-plus...
November 13, 2011
This little book takes on the guise of a journal kept by William Butten, a passenger on the Mayflower, who had decided to chronicle his adventures in the form of "small poems."
While loading the boat,
I notice some packed coffins.
Pessimistic Bunch.
Less than a week into their journey to the New World (now I have this song in my head), he meets a mysterious (and gorgeous, obvs) female who he finds out is (again, obviously) a vampire. The rest of the story details the history of what became America from the perspective of someone who has literally watched it all happen.
Blood tastes like cherries.
Mixed with a lot of copper.
And way too much salt.
Witch trials, wars, Son of Sam, Waco, myspace...all those horrible things we talk about with hushed voices - he was there. He did that. Wanna know why Babe Ruth kicked so much ass? William can tell you. Amelia Earhart's disappearance? Yeah, he knows what happened there, too.
While I'm not a bloodsucking fiend, I found it incredibly easy to relate to William. We both hate Bram Stoker and Stephenie Meyer, we share a love for Buffy and have similar taste in music.
Most all real vampires
Prefer classical music -
And maybe Tom Waits.
The entire book had me giggling, the pictures inside (photos and drawings) were great and the ending was pretty hilarious.
Dear Mister Mecum,
I greatly enjoyed this book.
Write more just for me.
While loading the boat,
I notice some packed coffins.
Pessimistic Bunch.
Less than a week into their journey to the New World (now I have this song in my head), he meets a mysterious (and gorgeous, obvs) female who he finds out is (again, obviously) a vampire. The rest of the story details the history of what became America from the perspective of someone who has literally watched it all happen.
Blood tastes like cherries.
Mixed with a lot of copper.
And way too much salt.
Witch trials, wars, Son of Sam, Waco, myspace...all those horrible things we talk about with hushed voices - he was there. He did that. Wanna know why Babe Ruth kicked so much ass? William can tell you. Amelia Earhart's disappearance? Yeah, he knows what happened there, too.
While I'm not a bloodsucking fiend, I found it incredibly easy to relate to William. We both hate Bram Stoker and Stephenie Meyer, we share a love for Buffy and have similar taste in music.
Most all real vampires
Prefer classical music -
And maybe Tom Waits.
The entire book had me giggling, the pictures inside (photos and drawings) were great and the ending was pretty hilarious.
Dear Mister Mecum,
I greatly enjoyed this book.
Write more just for me.
December 10, 2015
Vampire Haiku by Ryan Mecum, nice title isn't it? I got curious when I first laid my eyes in this book. Ryan Mecum wrote this book through the use of the 5-7-5 syllables of Haiku. It was a journal type book but in a Haiku way. William Butten, the character in this book and the one who made the journal was a vampire. Ooppps.. Sorry spoiler.
"Five syllables first,
then followed by seven more,
and then five again."
William Butten, as he explores living in a vampire life was pretty amazing. And how he survived living alone and drinking blood as the years pass by. I was really fascinated by the writing style of this book that I crave for something more. Writing Haiku was not as easy as it seems. I had tried it before, but thinking and writing with sense with only 5-7-5 syllables were really hard.
Plus, this book was a great read for this Halloween and it was amazing to read some other ways of writing, an old old way. 4/5 stars.
May 11, 2012
Amazing...
Fav. quote:
"Those were not vampires.
If sunlight makes you sparkle,
You’re a unicorn."
Fav. quote:
"Those were not vampires.
If sunlight makes you sparkle,
You’re a unicorn."
November 26, 2016
I loved it!
May 22, 2021
Quick read. Some were really cheesy. But I like the idea of the paranormal creature haiku books.
December 31, 2009
Ryan Mecum's Vampire Haiku mixes humor and poetry in diary form for vampire William Butten, who was turned in 1620. He falls in love with a beautiful woman on the Mayflower named Katherine, who turned him into a vampire. Soon he's parted from his love to roam America on his own and make his own friends. There are tales of some well known historic figures from Davy Crockett to Amelia Earhart and famous events in history like the Civil War and Woodstock.
Readers may initialy be attracted to the cover haiku, which also appears on page 37:
"You know that your drink
is down to the last few sips
once the toes curl up."
Butten has a twisted sense of humor, but readers will enjoy is little anecdotes about becoming a vampire and bumbling around learning how to feed, etc. Mecum uses his linguistic and historic knowledge to create fun and witty haiku. Although they are not precisely haiku in the traditional sense, they mostly adhere to the form's syllable count. It is fun to see Butten reveal insider knowledge about the deaths of Davy Crockett and other major historical figures. In some cases, the poems will have readers cringing in disgust.
"Discarded band-aids
are rare unexpected treats.
My version of gum." (page 113)
There are even moments in the book where the vampire makes fun of the modern vampire crazes from the goth kids to the latest vampire movies. One of the best haiku in the book is about the Twilight movie:
"Those were not vampires.
If sunlight makes you sparkle,
you're a unicorn." (page 117)
Will Butten ever find his true love, Katherine, or will he stop searching for her and settle down? Overall, those interested in humor and vampires will find Vampire Haiku to be a treat.
Readers may initialy be attracted to the cover haiku, which also appears on page 37:
"You know that your drink
is down to the last few sips
once the toes curl up."
Butten has a twisted sense of humor, but readers will enjoy is little anecdotes about becoming a vampire and bumbling around learning how to feed, etc. Mecum uses his linguistic and historic knowledge to create fun and witty haiku. Although they are not precisely haiku in the traditional sense, they mostly adhere to the form's syllable count. It is fun to see Butten reveal insider knowledge about the deaths of Davy Crockett and other major historical figures. In some cases, the poems will have readers cringing in disgust.
"Discarded band-aids
are rare unexpected treats.
My version of gum." (page 113)
There are even moments in the book where the vampire makes fun of the modern vampire crazes from the goth kids to the latest vampire movies. One of the best haiku in the book is about the Twilight movie:
"Those were not vampires.
If sunlight makes you sparkle,
you're a unicorn." (page 117)
Will Butten ever find his true love, Katherine, or will he stop searching for her and settle down? Overall, those interested in humor and vampires will find Vampire Haiku to be a treat.
December 30, 2015
Thanks to Ryan, who agreed to mail me out a copy of this book to review.
What's better than curling up with a book of poetry on a snowy evening? How about curling up with a book of Vampire poetry! Ryan Mecum has a way with words in this quirky collection of haiku's written by a man who was turned into a vampire buy the woman he loved. He chronicles his journey to America, and documents not only the search for his beloved, but also the times through which he exists, and his influence on historical moments.
Here are some of my favorite entries:
"How to eat someone:
Hold tight, bite neck, suck hard, drink.
Repeat as needed."
"Blood tastes like cherries
mixed with a lot of copper
and way too much salt."
"I don't get women.
I go and murder for love
and she's mad at me."
"I play with my food
by sucking blood through the holes
then blowing it back"
I am dying to get my hands on his Zombie Haiku. Who knew word groups of 5 - 7 - 5 could be so much fun?
What's better than curling up with a book of poetry on a snowy evening? How about curling up with a book of Vampire poetry! Ryan Mecum has a way with words in this quirky collection of haiku's written by a man who was turned into a vampire buy the woman he loved. He chronicles his journey to America, and documents not only the search for his beloved, but also the times through which he exists, and his influence on historical moments.
Here are some of my favorite entries:
"How to eat someone:
Hold tight, bite neck, suck hard, drink.
Repeat as needed."
"Blood tastes like cherries
mixed with a lot of copper
and way too much salt."
"I don't get women.
I go and murder for love
and she's mad at me."
"I play with my food
by sucking blood through the holes
then blowing it back"
I am dying to get my hands on his Zombie Haiku. Who knew word groups of 5 - 7 - 5 could be so much fun?
March 28, 2009
Sucked (get it?).
July 8, 2021
Just for this review
I'm doing something different
Write it in haikus
Three and a half stars
But I round it up to four
That is how I roll
This book is designed
As one man's haiku journal
with great art and pics
The story begins
Way back in 1620
On the Mayflower
He is then bitten
And becomes a vampire
Then adventure starts
The book then takes place
Over next 400 years
Up to present day
He interacts
With lots of famous people
Kind of Forest Gump
Also love story
With another vampire
And it really worked
There is a lot here
Over 300 haikus
Yes, I did count them
Author made a choice
To count the word Vampire
As two syllables
I think it is three
A little minor complaint
Maybe he is right
I might be grown up
And this book might be for kids
But it was so fun
I guess there are more
Other books in the series
with zombies instead
I'm doing something different
Write it in haikus
Three and a half stars
But I round it up to four
That is how I roll
This book is designed
As one man's haiku journal
with great art and pics
The story begins
Way back in 1620
On the Mayflower
He is then bitten
And becomes a vampire
Then adventure starts
The book then takes place
Over next 400 years
Up to present day
He interacts
With lots of famous people
Kind of Forest Gump
Also love story
With another vampire
And it really worked
There is a lot here
Over 300 haikus
Yes, I did count them
Author made a choice
To count the word Vampire
As two syllables
I think it is three
A little minor complaint
Maybe he is right
I might be grown up
And this book might be for kids
But it was so fun
I guess there are more
Other books in the series
with zombies instead
November 14, 2021
🌟 Libro de poco más de 100 páginas que, al estar escrito en forma de poemas de 3 versos, se lee en un rato. Muy similar a los anteriores cuadernos de Haikus del mismo autor que reseñé por aquí. Al igual que pasaba con ellos, es un libro que hay que leer en inglés, sin ser necesario un nivel demasiado alto del idioma para poder disfrutarlo.
🔖 Es curiosa y original la forma en que pueden cambiar los sucesos de la historia al verse involucrados los vampiros en ellos, teniendo causas y resultados difíciles de prever.
🔹 Personalmente, es el libro que menos me ha gustado de los tres que he leído hasta ahora. Tiene sus puntos, pero no me he divertido tanto. Espero que con el último quee queda por leer, de vuelta a los zombies, recupere la gracia del primero.
🔖 Es curiosa y original la forma en que pueden cambiar los sucesos de la historia al verse involucrados los vampiros en ellos, teniendo causas y resultados difíciles de prever.
🔹 Personalmente, es el libro que menos me ha gustado de los tres que he leído hasta ahora. Tiene sus puntos, pero no me he divertido tanto. Espero que con el último quee queda por leer, de vuelta a los zombies, recupere la gracia del primero.
April 2, 2023
4✨
Vampire Haiku is a journal from William Butten, written in Haiku form, about a Vampire.
I really liked the way it was written. I had been looking for poems of this genre and similar, so I HAD TO check this one out - and it didn’t disappoint!!
There were some funny parts - William’s thoughts on “Twilight”, but there were also some sadness.
If you like Haikus and horror, id say this is worth a read.
Vampire Haiku is a journal from William Butten, written in Haiku form, about a Vampire.
I really liked the way it was written. I had been looking for poems of this genre and similar, so I HAD TO check this one out - and it didn’t disappoint!!
There were some funny parts - William’s thoughts on “Twilight”, but there were also some sadness.
If you like Haikus and horror, id say this is worth a read.
May 18, 2017
Not as good as his first "Zombie Haiku" but still entertaining. If I read this first it would have been better I think. I had high expectations for this one. Good for a few chuckles. 5-7-5 all the way!
February 3, 2024
I picked this up at Mt. Yonah Book Exchange outside Helen, GA. I picked it up because it looked interesting. It was super cute, highly readable. I liked the history footnotes with a vampiric twist! Enjoyable lil’ niche poetry book.
May 29, 2017
While an entertaining book it was not nearly as good as Zombie Haiku was. Still entertaining and vampire fanatics will probably enjoy it.
July 3, 2017
Not a bad book. Really quick read.
December 7, 2017
I have always been Fascinated with vampires and how they might see the world. i loved the heart felt poems in this story. if anyone ever needed a strange love story here it is!
June 7, 2018
quick, quirky, humorous take of vampire-tinted American history
March 8, 2021
Absolutely love. I reread this book all the time.
March 11, 2023
Not as entertaining as his zombie books.
April 9, 2023
This was fun
March 30, 2015
I was at a bookstore to pick up a copy of Slippage: Previously Uncollected, Precariously Poised Stories and noted this on a shelf nearby. I like horror, but I am not in love with it in many of its modern literary forms and, of late, most vampire stories have left me wanting more or, in some cases, less banal meandering. Yet, I picked up the book and read the back cover and noted the idea of vampires affecting human history was mentioned near the end. I immensely enjoyed the book Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter as its clever blend of comedy and poignant details elevated it above the standard fair, though sadly the movie was lacking. Regardless, perhaps the good will that work imbued encouraged me to pick up this title.
I am very glad I did so. In several linked haiku, Mr. Mecum gives us humor, but it is equaled in tone by a sense of longing - though the vampire gives up on humanity on the surface, it becomes apparent through his words that he still needs it - allusions to watching The Count on Sesame Street, Buffy, and countless other elements - so beyond the idea of a food source, it is something more - and the emotion he has for his love interest is human as well - and, without giving too much away, the ending even echoes of a logical way to approach loss - the concept not as morose or plain as some vampire tales of late have given us.
A surface read may not give much, but a few of the lines, upon reflection, stuck with me. It warranted a brief review again and I found myself thinking of friends and colleagues which would find it interesting, which is the highest recommendation I can give - I thought of recommending it to others.
In the end, Mecum gives us a pretty substantial mix of topics, from TV vampires to famous authors and actors which his Butten character encounters. Ranging from dark humor to a sense of a need to continue on and live, I was shocked how much Mecum was able to deliver in 137 pages of haiku. Should you know a fan of the haiku form or just someone who wants a little dark comedy at the hand of a vampire, I would recommend this work. Humor and gallows humor with a quick placement of popular culture and historical happenings elevate this work beyond the mundane vampires we have been given of late and make it a worthy companion to the aforementioned work of Seth Grahame-Smith . It delivered so much more than expected - and I would recommend it even if a vampire was not holding my family hostage until I wrote this positive review...
I am very glad I did so. In several linked haiku, Mr. Mecum gives us humor, but it is equaled in tone by a sense of longing - though the vampire gives up on humanity on the surface, it becomes apparent through his words that he still needs it - allusions to watching The Count on Sesame Street, Buffy, and countless other elements - so beyond the idea of a food source, it is something more - and the emotion he has for his love interest is human as well - and, without giving too much away, the ending even echoes of a logical way to approach loss - the concept not as morose or plain as some vampire tales of late have given us.
A surface read may not give much, but a few of the lines, upon reflection, stuck with me. It warranted a brief review again and I found myself thinking of friends and colleagues which would find it interesting, which is the highest recommendation I can give - I thought of recommending it to others.
In the end, Mecum gives us a pretty substantial mix of topics, from TV vampires to famous authors and actors which his Butten character encounters. Ranging from dark humor to a sense of a need to continue on and live, I was shocked how much Mecum was able to deliver in 137 pages of haiku. Should you know a fan of the haiku form or just someone who wants a little dark comedy at the hand of a vampire, I would recommend this work. Humor and gallows humor with a quick placement of popular culture and historical happenings elevate this work beyond the mundane vampires we have been given of late and make it a worthy companion to the aforementioned work of Seth Grahame-Smith . It delivered so much more than expected - and I would recommend it even if a vampire was not holding my family hostage until I wrote this positive review...
February 18, 2017
it's like the dark version of forrest gump
ok, i mean it no way sounds like it starts in the 1620s, but, it's funny and it's sweet and it's sad
ok, i mean it no way sounds like it starts in the 1620s, but, it's funny and it's sweet and it's sad
August 28, 2009
Vampire Haiku is a poetry journal written by a vampire whose life spans for centuries, starting during the birth of America. The undead poet was turned into a vampire hundreds of years ago and has lived through (and possibly caused) some of America’s defining events. Although many of the haiku stand on their own, the hundreds of haiku also flow together to tell one story of being a vampire, living during the entire history of America, and forever longing to find and be with the woman who turned him into a vampire many years ago as he crossed the Atlantic Ocean on the Mayflower.
Thoughts: I really enjoyed this quick, delightful and a bit gross book. Made me laugh quite a bit. My favorite haiku was in reference to the Twilight series:
"If this were real life,
Ed would have looked at her neck--
Bite, dead, burp, credits."
Thoughts: I really enjoyed this quick, delightful and a bit gross book. Made me laugh quite a bit. My favorite haiku was in reference to the Twilight series:
"If this were real life,
Ed would have looked at her neck--
Bite, dead, burp, credits."
September 13, 2014
However, many readers will forgive Mecum these glaring errors, as the book is clearly listed as "humor," and issues with historical accuracy and poetic quality can be written off as part of the joke. That being said, Vampire Haiku is not without its cringe moments, and there are a few places where readers will shudder. Readers interested in a quick, humorous vampire read that explores and reinvents United States history through a blood-sucking lens and challenges modern vampire stereotypes will really enjoy Ryan Mecum's Vampire Haiku. Full review here: http://shroudmagazinebookreviews.blog...
February 8, 2017
it was ok. i enjoyed zombie haiku a lot but this just felt like he was trying too hard to make it a true story.
October 14, 2013
Loved it! These 'Haiku Horror' books are like 20 minute reads to clear your head. The only reason I dropped this from 5 to 4 stars is because of some chronological issues, and a little flip flopping between whether or not 'vampire' is 2 or 3 syllables. Other than that, I highly recommend to vampire lovers of all sorts, although this 'vampire's journal' tears apart some of the most popular vampire lit and movies, Twilight included. It made me laugh though, because I hated Twilight as much as our journal writer did! ;-)
November 2, 2013
I don't know when I actually read this book. College, most likely. I just found this while I was sorting through my old stuff. I remembered buying it because of the colors (as lively as goth can be), and for a really cheap price.
Well, this had been a very entertaining read. While I am not really that much of a vampire fiend (except for Damon!), I still enjoy vampire reads written in a very humorous fashion. Mr. Mecum's writing had been very delightful and insightful, what with all the history involved.
Plus, the art. It's like a picture book, a kiddie book for adults. HA! Makes sense?
Well, this had been a very entertaining read. While I am not really that much of a vampire fiend (except for Damon!), I still enjoy vampire reads written in a very humorous fashion. Mr. Mecum's writing had been very delightful and insightful, what with all the history involved.
Plus, the art. It's like a picture book, a kiddie book for adults. HA! Makes sense?
February 24, 2016
10 stars! if i could give that much..hahah
this was my first time reading a haiku form of a book/story. oh, it was meant to be a poetry journal from a perspective of a vampire. it was hilarious, very entertaining with a touch of facts and history at some point. though the ending was a bit heartbreaking for our dear vampire, still it was a great story. and i loved it that way. also, the graphic each page adds up to the perfection of this book.
great job for the author, Ryan Mecum. he just created a great master piece.
this was my first time reading a haiku form of a book/story. oh, it was meant to be a poetry journal from a perspective of a vampire. it was hilarious, very entertaining with a touch of facts and history at some point. though the ending was a bit heartbreaking for our dear vampire, still it was a great story. and i loved it that way. also, the graphic each page adds up to the perfection of this book.
great job for the author, Ryan Mecum. he just created a great master piece.
March 7, 2010
I was so disappointed by this book. I absolutely loved Zombie Haiku, and it remains one of the most brilliant things I've ever read, so this book was a giant let down. Maybe I was expecting too much out of it or expecting something different, but either way, I did not like it. I thought the random bits of historical things were boring, and the end was just ridiculous. Talking about modern vampire books and television completely ruined the last part of it. Ugh.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 75 reviews