Mojo Mom: Nurturing Your Self While Raising a Family

by Amy Tiemann

Read Amy Tiemann's posts on the Penguin Blog.

MOJO MOM helps you answer the question, "Who Am I Now that I'm A Mom?"

What is Mommy Mojo? It's the feeling you get when you're a parent at the top of your game, juggling the kids and the many facets of life, and keeping your own needs in balance. Motherhood is a tremendous gift, but it's also a huge identity shift. Becoming a Mojo Mom means bringing your self and your dreams back into focus, while still giving your family the loving attention it needs. It may sound like a fantasy, but it can be done.

Mojo Mom shows women practical ways to:

*Prepare to become a Mom without losing your identity
*Survive and enjoy the intense early years
*Save some of your best energy and creativity for your own ideas and dreams
*Reenter the workplace or take on a new path with confidence and ease
*Learn the key elements to the long-term success of your marriage
*Become a Naptime Activist-and change the world in just an hour a week
*Rise above the "Mommy Wars" between stay-at-home and working moms
*Use motherhood as an opportunity for reinvention
Getting your mojo back is not just another item for your to-do list-it's your right. Amy Tiemann, MomsRising.org executive team member and founder of MojoMom.com, will help every woman explore her true self.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

256 pages, Paperback

First published May 1, 2005

About the author

Child safety and parenting expert Amy Tiemann, PhD, has reached millions of people worldwide with her message of personal safety, respect, and empowerment. She is a Stanford-trained neuroscientist, the co-author of the Amazon best-selling guide to child safety "Doing Right by Our Kids: Protecting Child Safety at All Levels;" author of "Mojo Mom;" creator of "Courageous Parents, Confident Kids;" and an executive producer of socially-relevant documentary films. She is a Senior Program leader for the global nonprofit leader in personal safety training, Kidpower International.

Reviews

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amy has her own inimitable approach to this bottomless topic of life as a mother. She has a scientist's mind, a seeker's eye and a mother's heart. The result is overwhelmingly generous, kind and reassuring. If I am the priest at your bedside, she is the doctor. Believe me, you want to see the doctor well before the priest arrives. In her book, Amy asks the questions we may be afraid to ask ourselves. They are practical and can seem quite impossible and intangible in the early years. Questions about work, time, space, money, childcare, self-care, power and politics. Mojo Mom will leave you energized and activated, not agitated and polarized, as so much mommy talk can.

[Cynthia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won this book on Goodreads, and I'm really glad I did! Besides all the advice and tips on surviving motherhood, there are lots of great references and resources for those of us who'd like more. A great book for new mothers, and would make a terrific gift!

[Margaret · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read for expectant Moms, new Moms, Moms with preschoolers, grandmothers. . .well-researched, writtten with compassion and personal experience and great suggestions. There's a wonderful bibliography for further exploration.

[MajorBedhead · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't recommend this book highly enough. If you've ever felt lost and overwhelmed by motherhood, read this.

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very practical guide for new Mums. The Author’s “voice” is very compassionate. I liked that there are lots of lists of ideas throughout - you don’t have to adopt all, but can choose those that would work for you. I’d definitely recommend this book to women who have established lives/careers/relationships before pregnancy that feel a huge shift in their identity following the birth of their first child, or those Mothers who struggle to make time for their own self care. I did want a bit more from the book towards the end, but a quick and easy read overall.

[Caitlin Keely · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book during my first visit to my grad school and only just got round to reading it cover to cover. It’s a lovely book with an important message. I agree with the premise and I appreciate the useful suggestions, but the only reason this didn’t receive a 5 star rating from me was that it is obviously written from the viewpoint of white privilege. Not every mother is a wife with a supportive husband.

[Florinda · Rating 3 out of 5]

When I first began making my way around the blogiverse a couple of years ago, Amy Tiemann's blog, Mojo Mom, became an early addition to my blogroll. Through her blog, I've followed the process of her writing an updated edition of her parenting book, also titled Mojo Mom, and was excited to be offered a chance to read and review it.

One accusation often leveled at "bad mothers" is selfishness. But there's a selfishness of self-importance and superiority, and a selfishness that simply acknowledges that one's self is just as important as anyone else's. The subtitle of Tiemann's book refers to the second kind of selfishness; it's the idea that we're actually better nurturers of our families and communities when we don't lose ourselves in the process.

Acknowledging that motherhood changes our identities, Tiemann's premise is that change doesn't have to equal loss. Even when we're overwhelmed by the exhaustion and demands of early motherhood, we need to recognize that our own needs and wants still exist - and deserve time and attention. It's not going to be like this forever, and self-care is the first basic step in ensuring that a sense of self remains healthy.

Tiemann's tone throughout the book is knowledgable and encouraging, rather than authoritative and insistent.  Beginning with the early-motherhood period she calls "the cocoon," she suggests that this period of intense mother-and-child togetherness can also be a time when we re-evaluate who we are and who we want to be. The changes motherhood brings can help us focus on how we want to go forward as ourselves. And despite the somewhat New-Age-y way I've put that, Tiemann's approach is very practical. She discusses ways to handle gulit and anxiety, claiming time and "mind space," and discovering outlets for self-expression. She examines relationships with partners, money, and the larger community, and suggests that at-home-mom/working-mom "mommy wars" may be fighting the wrong enemies. She offers references and resources in every chapter, as well as illustrative anecdotes.

Recommendation: I'm a believer in the kind of "positive selfishness" that this book advocates. I don't feel that we give our best to our relationships if we don't make our own care and nurturing a priority. I think it's very easy to get "lost" in motherhood, and I appreciate the ways that Amy Tiemann addresses and combats this in Mojo Mom. I would recommend this for mothers-to-be and new moms as a little nudge to care for themselves during this wild transitional time. However, motherhood has a number of transitional times - as do the childhoods is parallels - and Mojo Mom's ideas and guidance could be valuable to mothers whose children are emerging into the pre-school and school-age years, and even mothers of teens and those on the verge of emptying nests. Amy Tiemann's book suggests that it's never too late to locate and nurture your Mommy Mojo.

[Heather]

I was extremely excited to have won this pre-released book. I am a new mom of a 9-month old who returned to the workforce after just 10 weeks because financially we just couldn't swing any more time. It was heartbreaking to leave my baby in a daycare center, but I did what I had to do and it works for us. After reading this fabulous book, I am really inspired to become me again and not just Victoria's mom. I sat down with my spouse and discussed with him that I will need more help from him going forward in regard to housework and also giving me some "me" time. I adore my daughter more than anything but I have learned from reading Mojo Mom, that being a mom is not the end all to my life. I also found that I really want to find my passion. What i have been doing career-wise is fine to bring home a paycheck but it does not define me. I am going to make it my mission to find my passion. I would highly recommend this book to any new or old mom. Well done, Amy Tiemann!

[Poppy]

From the introduction, I think that this could be a good book any new parent or soon-to-be would be interested in reading. Perhaps it is that the author and I are of the same mind, or maybe all new mothers feel the same way, but thus far the author has "nailed" the sea change that a person experiences upon giving up the pre-baby life and all the incumbent discomforts associated with becoming someone else instantly with few opportunities for the old life. More on the book as I progress, but at least so far I can really get where she's coming from.

By the way, I've been listening to the Mojo Mom podcast occasionally - I think it is a good listen so far. She and the editor of Parenting magazine talk and often have a guest. I've listened to very few and they are the earlier ones, so I suspect it would get better. I would only really suggest it for those with kids. Still making my turtle-like way through the book.

[Lyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had really high expectations for this book. The book was good, but I did want more at the end. One really nice thing about the book is the abundance of resources and footnotes citing other works. Other reviewers have noted that a lot of what she says is common sense. I can see why they would say that, but I also think that it depends on the woman. I think the book will be most helpful for women who have established a strong identity (whether it is career, art, whatever) BEFORE becoming a mother. The book really is trying to address what happens to that identity when motherhood turns it on its head. It is helping me to put a structure around defining what I do what to do and be now that I really have a chance to stay home if I want to.

[Chelsea · Rating 5 out of 5]

"When Mama ain't happy, Ain't nobody happy"- Mom's Wisdom

THIS BOOK IS THA BOMB!!!!!!
Thanks to GoodReads...I won this book and I have had it for awhile...I would read bits and pieces and then I would forget about it for a bit. So I finally finished it and I want to meet the author! Amy Tiemann has a wealth of knowledge that I wish I knew about before having my 2 kids. I could relate just a tad too much with her advice. I will tell every mother and soon to be mother to be about this book. I could go on and on about how wonderful and insightful this book is but I won't....Just pick it up and read it and share it with your friends!!!!

*(There is even an excerpt on MOJO DAD'S. So this book is for the mama's and the papa's.)

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hi everyone, it's author Amy Tiemann here. Thanks for your comments on the original (red cover) 2006 edition of Mojo Mom. I wanted to make sure you know that the new revised, expanded and updated 2009 edition has just come out. For those of you who wanted more resources and more discussion about women's leadership--that's all in the new 2009 edition, published by Gotham Books and easily recognizable by its BLUE cover. I hope you'll check it out: the new Mojo Mom 2009 edition.

[heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a must read for any mother in any phase of mothering. I have been mothering for over seven years and I walked away feeling encouraged with where I am in my mothering. Mojo Mom is a book worth reading along any part of a mother's journey. Tiemann provides warmth and joy for this tremendous responsibility and gift we all experience as mothers. I will definately encourage all mothers I know who are new and seasoned to read and to find their mojo as they continue their life long quest of being good at what they do. Thank you Amy for writing this and providing us with insight to find the balance we all seek in such a strange and beautiful gift we receive in the face of mothering.

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

As Amy's husband, you would expect me give her book a high rating, but it's not because I'm married to her. It's the other way around: I'm married to her because of her many gifts, which include the gift of writing.

But my review is also influenced by the number of times I have heard from readers (either directly, or what Amy has chosen to share with me) about the profoundly positive impact this book has had on their life's outlook. Thus, the combination of great writing and equally great response earn my highest rating and recommendation.

[Christina, Join Me on Storygraph! · Rating 4 out of 5]

This has some great ideas for coping with the life changes that come with being a new mom, and also helps put perspective on how life changes when a second child enters the family too. It has some ideas on what moms can do to be more than "just a mom," whether they work inside the home or outside of it, as well as ways in which dads can help.
It was a really quick read, and also has a ton of resources in each section for further reading.

[Cris · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was super excited to get this goodread giveaway, but i just couldnt get into it. The book starts with a focus on the early early years of mommying, and perhaps that was what lost me -- been there, done that.

I did not finish the book, and have set it aside for now. It remains on my bedside table and i will try to pick it again this summer, perhaps start later into the book.

[Lori Tatar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mojo Mom is a book that offers validation for those things you know you need but are afraid to ask for, let alone demand. It is full of suggestions and resources for mothers, whether new or well-practiced. Amy Tiemann has put into words what so many of us have felt for so long but didn't know how to express.

[Sacha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Unfortunate title. Part of why I gave 4 stars to this book is because I read it at exactly the right time for me. Perhaps I'll become a flexible workplace activist. Perhaps I'll just keep my car clean.

[Christy · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book makes a good point but it's common sense. Who doesn't know that if you don't take care of yourself, you can't really take good care of anyone else? I don't really recommend the book.

[Hippymomma · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was not as helpful as it might have been when I was a new mom...moms of older toddlers will probably have figured most of this out already (it's important to take time for yourself...)

[Bernadette · Rating 5 out of 5]

http://rantsravesreviews.homestead.co...

[Catherine Just · Rating 5 out of 5]

So far I really love this book!

[Kathryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

having a hard time feeling motivated to read this one so far....

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing reminder of tending to self!