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Nevertold: The Son
A rare male born to a hidden tribe begins a journey destined to branch into an intricate epic in the sprawling fantasy world of Nevold.
The beast-like Valkys, great in number and with innate magical abilities, were unable to stand against the Children of Man’s artificial perversion of the world’s energy. After the tireless wars ended, a tentative peace settled over Nevold. Now, scattered to the far reaches, many beasts try to scrape out a living, but none so unique as the Manyari, creatures that exist from a forgotten union of Man and Valkys, not fully of both and without either side accepting them as their own.
But today, one tribe of Manyari has reason to celebrate. A rarely seen male has been born. Raised in his remote village of Orahai, Kemahni is unknowingly held captive by his sisters and mothers to be used for their continued salvation. His chosen guardian, Ashava, along with her companion, Tahdwi, fight to keep him safe, despite him vying to live his own life. His birth mother, Saleal, watches him grow, hiding the secrets of his true purpose and nature, while finding it increasingly difficult to fulfill her duty.
When Kemahni's friend Kiyadeh returns home after years away, trained but rattled by the outside world, he is unprepared for her arrival or what she asks of him. Few know his true purpose, and when the truth is revealed, a choice must be made between freedom and duty.
The beast-like Valkys, great in number and with innate magical abilities, were unable to stand against the Children of Man’s artificial perversion of the world’s energy. After the tireless wars ended, a tentative peace settled over Nevold. Now, scattered to the far reaches, many beasts try to scrape out a living, but none so unique as the Manyari, creatures that exist from a forgotten union of Man and Valkys, not fully of both and without either side accepting them as their own.
But today, one tribe of Manyari has reason to celebrate. A rarely seen male has been born. Raised in his remote village of Orahai, Kemahni is unknowingly held captive by his sisters and mothers to be used for their continued salvation. His chosen guardian, Ashava, along with her companion, Tahdwi, fight to keep him safe, despite him vying to live his own life. His birth mother, Saleal, watches him grow, hiding the secrets of his true purpose and nature, while finding it increasingly difficult to fulfill her duty.
When Kemahni's friend Kiyadeh returns home after years away, trained but rattled by the outside world, he is unprepared for her arrival or what she asks of him. Few know his true purpose, and when the truth is revealed, a choice must be made between freedom and duty.
235 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 20, 2022
2 people are currently reading
14 people want to read
About the author
M. R. Moraine
3 books6 followersM. R. Moraine has never thought of himself as a writer, just an adult with a runaway imagination.
Influenced by movies and video games alike, he likes to dream big with his stories. Nevertold: The Son will be his first foray into writing with the goal of being grand in scope and able to draw in readers of all kinds. With his wife and two cats, he looks to change the world in small but noticeable ways, keeping it going with stories he hopes you will love and share.
Influenced by movies and video games alike, he likes to dream big with his stories. Nevertold: The Son will be his first foray into writing with the goal of being grand in scope and able to draw in readers of all kinds. With his wife and two cats, he looks to change the world in small but noticeable ways, keeping it going with stories he hopes you will love and share.
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
November 21, 2023
The story M. R. Moraine has started in this book is so promising. The characters are believable and the world building has a great foundation. I enjoyed the magic system the author has created. It's interesting and different than what we get in most fantasy books.
I like how we get some LGBTQ+ representation in the story. Too many authors write about all female villages/communities, but don't utilize any LGBTQ+ themes.
The story could have used another round of editing to catch the grammatical errors (personally it took me out of the story), and to polish up the big fight scene towards the end.
Overall, I really enjoyed "Nevertold: The Son" and I can't wait to read the next one!
I like how we get some LGBTQ+ representation in the story. Too many authors write about all female villages/communities, but don't utilize any LGBTQ+ themes.
The story could have used another round of editing to catch the grammatical errors (personally it took me out of the story), and to polish up the big fight scene towards the end.
Overall, I really enjoyed "Nevertold: The Son" and I can't wait to read the next one!
July 2, 2025
As a fellow writer, I believe it would be a disservice to the author to withhold my thoughts and criticisms of his work. Doubly so, because we have met and encouraged each other in our respective writing pursuits at VGMCon over the past few years. Sorry I hadn't gotten to The Son sooner, but now I can finally say I have read it, and will be starting book 2 very soon. Now for my thoughts...
I'll begin with the positive. The setting of this world has a lot of promise. The Manyari as a species are visually interesting as a humanoid race with scales, horns, and long, flexible ears. It's a breath of fresh air to have a lead cast be something a bit different than the standard human, elf, dwarf, etc. in a fantasy setting like this. I hope book 2 goes even further in setting them apart from the usual human types in movement and utility.
I also like what we have of the magic system, or yarik, in this world so far. While naturally, it is a means of giving weapons like spears and daggers a means of having mystical properties with the use of stones imbued with yarik; I especially liked the creative uses the Manyari have for them in everyday life. There's a scene with two characters fishing, and instead of carrying their bait in a bucket, they use a yarik stone to form a ball of water that stores their bait and their catch of the day on the way back. Such a simple thing, but it helps establish that this magic is a part of this world.
Now, before I begin my criticisms, I want to be clear that this is intended to be constructive feedback. It is far easier to point out flaws or mistakes in someone else's work than it is with your own. And I want to see Moraine continue to learn and grow as a writer. This world has potential and I hope to see it realized.
I'll start with the technical stuff. There were a lot of typos. The author is aware and I'm confident book 2 will have far fewer of them. But also, I found some parts a bit meandering at times. The use of overly flowery language got distracting at times as well. Sometimes less is more, though there are certainly cases to be made for more color in the narration. Practice helps you find the balance.
Speaking of narration, there were certain points where the narrator divulged information that would have been better revealed by the characters involved. The most egregious instance I can recall was actually near the end of the story. To put it vaguely, one character was secretly responsible for arranging an event to happen. The event failed, but instead of having some kind of interaction or visual sign of displeasure, the narrator basically just points a finger at the character and says "By the way, it was them."
The other biggest thing that struck me is the inconsistency of the consequences of a character's actions carrying over beyond the chapter they occur in. Ashava and Kiyadeh both failed in crucial duties and were treated harshly in the moment, but by the next chapter or two, they were still given the most important role in the village as if the past events did not actually matter. In other cases, it felt like the emotional state of certain characters were bouncing back and forth from one extreme to the other between chapters. While character development should rarely be in a straight line, the amount of swerving was dizzying in the most extreme cases.
The final critique I'll give here today will probably sound harsher than I intend it to. The story didn't truly feel like it was moving in a meaningful direction until the third act (The leadup to the Bonding Ceremony) began. It's easier for me to say as the reader, but I think the story would have been stronger had it put more focus on this point. I'm sure some of that material will pay off in the next book or book 3, but it's important for the first book of a new series to be able to stand on its own, while still leaving room for more to come. I hope that made sense.
I believe I've said enough for one day. Apologies to the author if this comes off as a lecture. I'm genuinely trying to help, and as I've said before, I want to see him continue to grow and improve. By next VGMCon, I hope to be all caught up on the stories of Nevertold. I'll be looking forward to talking to M.R. Moraine and C.E. Linares about them then.
I'll begin with the positive. The setting of this world has a lot of promise. The Manyari as a species are visually interesting as a humanoid race with scales, horns, and long, flexible ears. It's a breath of fresh air to have a lead cast be something a bit different than the standard human, elf, dwarf, etc. in a fantasy setting like this. I hope book 2 goes even further in setting them apart from the usual human types in movement and utility.
I also like what we have of the magic system, or yarik, in this world so far. While naturally, it is a means of giving weapons like spears and daggers a means of having mystical properties with the use of stones imbued with yarik; I especially liked the creative uses the Manyari have for them in everyday life. There's a scene with two characters fishing, and instead of carrying their bait in a bucket, they use a yarik stone to form a ball of water that stores their bait and their catch of the day on the way back. Such a simple thing, but it helps establish that this magic is a part of this world.
Now, before I begin my criticisms, I want to be clear that this is intended to be constructive feedback. It is far easier to point out flaws or mistakes in someone else's work than it is with your own. And I want to see Moraine continue to learn and grow as a writer. This world has potential and I hope to see it realized.
I'll start with the technical stuff. There were a lot of typos. The author is aware and I'm confident book 2 will have far fewer of them. But also, I found some parts a bit meandering at times. The use of overly flowery language got distracting at times as well. Sometimes less is more, though there are certainly cases to be made for more color in the narration. Practice helps you find the balance.
Speaking of narration, there were certain points where the narrator divulged information that would have been better revealed by the characters involved. The most egregious instance I can recall was actually near the end of the story. To put it vaguely, one character was secretly responsible for arranging an event to happen. The event failed, but instead of having some kind of interaction or visual sign of displeasure, the narrator basically just points a finger at the character and says "By the way, it was them."
The other biggest thing that struck me is the inconsistency of the consequences of a character's actions carrying over beyond the chapter they occur in. Ashava and Kiyadeh both failed in crucial duties and were treated harshly in the moment, but by the next chapter or two, they were still given the most important role in the village as if the past events did not actually matter. In other cases, it felt like the emotional state of certain characters were bouncing back and forth from one extreme to the other between chapters. While character development should rarely be in a straight line, the amount of swerving was dizzying in the most extreme cases.
The final critique I'll give here today will probably sound harsher than I intend it to. The story didn't truly feel like it was moving in a meaningful direction until the third act (The leadup to the Bonding Ceremony) began. It's easier for me to say as the reader, but I think the story would have been stronger had it put more focus on this point. I'm sure some of that material will pay off in the next book or book 3, but it's important for the first book of a new series to be able to stand on its own, while still leaving room for more to come. I hope that made sense.
I believe I've said enough for one day. Apologies to the author if this comes off as a lecture. I'm genuinely trying to help, and as I've said before, I want to see him continue to grow and improve. By next VGMCon, I hope to be all caught up on the stories of Nevertold. I'll be looking forward to talking to M.R. Moraine and C.E. Linares about them then.
June 9, 2024
I can't wait for the sequel! My husband isn't a reader, but Nevertold: The Son caught his interest at ValleyCon last year so he bought it for me; he knows that I will tell him all about the books I am reading, whether he wants me to or not. I enjoyed the whole book and enjoyed talking to my husband about it more; I'm hoping that he'll pick it up and give it a read sometime.
October 7, 2024
I do think this book has a very promising plot with promising characters and promising world building. I do think it could've been a bit more polished with another round of editing to polish up a couple more grammatical errors.
I do like how there is a glossary at the end of the book that details the elements that are mentioned. However, I feel like those details could have been incorporated more into the story to the point where a glossary wouldn't be needed because a reader would have better understanding if those details had been included within the plot itself.
I do like how there is a glossary at the end of the book that details the elements that are mentioned. However, I feel like those details could have been incorporated more into the story to the point where a glossary wouldn't be needed because a reader would have better understanding if those details had been included within the plot itself.
September 10, 2024
This book just wasn’t for me. There is some interesting world building, but I think another pass with a good editor could have made that clearer.
It was also hard for me to connect with any of the main characters. They are interesting characters but I never felt like I got a peek beneath their surface.
The story has some great potential, but it just didn’t click for me.
It was also hard for me to connect with any of the main characters. They are interesting characters but I never felt like I got a peek beneath their surface.
The story has some great potential, but it just didn’t click for me.
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews