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Mila and the Bone Man
Straddling old world and new, Mila and the Bone Man explores the corrosive power of guilt, the solace to be found in the natural world, and our capacity to heal as well as hurt.
Set in the forest in northern New Zealand, Mila is a young woman descended from healers. A family death causes her terrible guilt and sets her on a path away from home and to the distant city.
Her friend Tommy, the quirky boy next door who makes models from bones, helps to bring her home, where she belongs.
Set in the forest in northern New Zealand, Mila is a young woman descended from healers. A family death causes her terrible guilt and sets her on a path away from home and to the distant city.
Her friend Tommy, the quirky boy next door who makes models from bones, helps to bring her home, where she belongs.
272 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2022
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 39 reviews
October 15, 2022
A most remarkable powerful book! Cleverly weaved story encompassing culture, connections to Northland, the power of plants for healing and a journey of hurt, guilt, pain and aroha! Thoroughly recommended it!
October 21, 2022
This book is a complex and generous story about a young woman who breaks and heals and how life and family both contributes to both the breaking and the healing. The land is as much of a character and Mila and her family. I have thought about them so much since reading this story.
Lauren's language is rich and her descriptions add to the story (often i will skip to get to the narrative - i am a story gobbler, what can i say!) and help deepen the readers connection to the characters and the place.
I highly recommend this book!
Lauren's language is rich and her descriptions add to the story (often i will skip to get to the narrative - i am a story gobbler, what can i say!) and help deepen the readers connection to the characters and the place.
I highly recommend this book!
October 22, 2022
I didn’t want this book to end. I would go to sleep at night thinking about Mila and wake in the morning thinking about her. Beautifully written book that touched my heart with its entwined life lessons. Loved the local connection and familiarity on each page.
Looking forward to reading more of Lauren’s work ❤️❤️
Looking forward to reading more of Lauren’s work ❤️❤️
September 15, 2025
This is the first book in awhile that made me sob. This is a story mostly set in rural Northland, a Māori whānau with realistic struggles that are familiar. However, the connections with the ngahere, the whenua, rongoā Māori and purakau are beautifully written. Despite the despair at times, suffered by the characters you were still able to see hope and light. Loved it.
November 18, 2022
I loved this book, I have over 250 books by New Zealand authors and this has to be one of my absolute favourites. I thought the plot, the characters and the setting were amazing. I don't know if a sequel is coming but can't wait for more novels. Unsure what to buy someone for Christmas This is the perfect gift. Congratulations Lauren Roche. Superb work.
November 16, 2022
I loved every word in this book. Lauren Roche is a writer that captures something very unique and fresh in her style. It was both moving and memorable. Absolutely recommend.
April 7, 2024
A deeply spiritual and emotional novel written by a local Northland author. The central character is tangata tiriti trying to integrate her learning about trauma, living and healing with Maori and Croatian world views. Our book club were honoured to be joined by the author, Lauren Roche, to explore the book.
June 6, 2023
N.B. I summarise the story here.
The story follows Mila from a young, much-loved daughter through her troubled teens to her finding reconciliation in her twenties. It focuses on her responses to two tragic events, first the accidental death of her baby sister, for which she blames herself, and her rape by a friend of her father in her early teens, for which she partly blames her mother for not protecting her. The tension in the story is alleviated by the calming effects of her aunt, an elderly neighbour, and by Mila’s interaction with the forest – its healing powers and place of escape.
The bone man of the title is a neuro-diverse boy, grandson of the elderly neighbour, who leads a solitary life mostly in the forest looking for animal bones, which he puts together as skeletons. He, Tommy, loves and cares for Mila in his own way and encourages her to return to the loving bosom of her family from her self-imposed exile in Auckland, where she gets hospital work and realises her gift for helping patients. The story focuses on Mila’s difficult relationship with her mother who suffers the twin griefs of losing both her daughters – one dead and the other in self-exile. A deeper theme is the imperfectness of memory, especially childhood memory, and the responsibilities of the very young for their actions.
Positive features
1. It is a compelling story, well told and with a mostly satisfying conclusion.
2. The story is told with compassion bred from experience, and it is heavily influenced by the author’s life. The characters are real and the reader can empathize with them all.
3. The author has a gift for describing the forest and things natural. This acts as a balance for her description of the tragic events and their aftermath.
4. The child’s death and Mila’s rape are told in a matter-of-fact way with compassion and without undue graphic detail or horror. The story focuses much more on their aftermath.
Negative features
1. I feel conflicted between wanting to support the author for her first and really good novel, and the achievements of her own life winning through tragedy, and feeling that the story read too much as autobiography and as a novel would have benefitted from a more objective telling in the third person. As it is, the story could be criticized for being a little to self-centered and insufficiently self-critical.
2. Despite being in the title the Bone Man, Tommy, his story was not told as fully as one expected and I think opportunities were missed here to develop his character as being more central to the story. Similarly, Mila’s mother’s struggles with addiction were presented almost as a failing that she should overcome, and an opportunity was missed for more compassion and development of her mother’s character.
3. The last page contains a minor shock and left me wondering about the author’s intentions in ending the story.
I am grateful to the New Zealand Book Discussion Scheme for providing my review copy.
The story follows Mila from a young, much-loved daughter through her troubled teens to her finding reconciliation in her twenties. It focuses on her responses to two tragic events, first the accidental death of her baby sister, for which she blames herself, and her rape by a friend of her father in her early teens, for which she partly blames her mother for not protecting her. The tension in the story is alleviated by the calming effects of her aunt, an elderly neighbour, and by Mila’s interaction with the forest – its healing powers and place of escape.
The bone man of the title is a neuro-diverse boy, grandson of the elderly neighbour, who leads a solitary life mostly in the forest looking for animal bones, which he puts together as skeletons. He, Tommy, loves and cares for Mila in his own way and encourages her to return to the loving bosom of her family from her self-imposed exile in Auckland, where she gets hospital work and realises her gift for helping patients. The story focuses on Mila’s difficult relationship with her mother who suffers the twin griefs of losing both her daughters – one dead and the other in self-exile. A deeper theme is the imperfectness of memory, especially childhood memory, and the responsibilities of the very young for their actions.
Positive features
1. It is a compelling story, well told and with a mostly satisfying conclusion.
2. The story is told with compassion bred from experience, and it is heavily influenced by the author’s life. The characters are real and the reader can empathize with them all.
3. The author has a gift for describing the forest and things natural. This acts as a balance for her description of the tragic events and their aftermath.
4. The child’s death and Mila’s rape are told in a matter-of-fact way with compassion and without undue graphic detail or horror. The story focuses much more on their aftermath.
Negative features
1. I feel conflicted between wanting to support the author for her first and really good novel, and the achievements of her own life winning through tragedy, and feeling that the story read too much as autobiography and as a novel would have benefitted from a more objective telling in the third person. As it is, the story could be criticized for being a little to self-centered and insufficiently self-critical.
2. Despite being in the title the Bone Man, Tommy, his story was not told as fully as one expected and I think opportunities were missed here to develop his character as being more central to the story. Similarly, Mila’s mother’s struggles with addiction were presented almost as a failing that she should overcome, and an opportunity was missed for more compassion and development of her mother’s character.
3. The last page contains a minor shock and left me wondering about the author’s intentions in ending the story.
I am grateful to the New Zealand Book Discussion Scheme for providing my review copy.
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November 27, 2022Mila and the Bone Man is a novel by a New Zealand author that attunes us intricately to a world, a country, with so much natural beauty that its custodians have seen fit to bestow on a river the same legal status as its humans.
Roche invites, through rich and juicy symbolism, our complete absorption into this world. A world peopled with patupaiarehe who live deep in the New Zealand bush, who have red hair and play haunting tunes on their bone flutes. A world where the pain its humans feel can eventually be healed.
Roche invites, through rich and juicy symbolism, our complete absorption into this world. A world peopled with patupaiarehe who live deep in the New Zealand bush, who have red hair and play haunting tunes on their bone flutes. A world where the pain its humans feel can eventually be healed.
January 5, 2023
This book has a special meaning to me, because it connects me to a friend who first gave it for me to read. I really enjoyed the pace of the story and how it was hard to predict the main character next actions. That made me long for the next page. It's filled with a culture that may seem quite familiar to someone who lives in New Zealand (definitely required me to search for the meaning of a few words), but nevertheless it brought me joy reading about the forest and the impact it has on the book's characters, I always loved being connected with the environment and these days I find myself more and more wanting to see the beauties created by nature rather than the ones created by the man. It kinda reminds me somehow of a book from Eça de Queirós called "the city and the mountains", but just in the aspect of the city vs rural. It's a sweet book, so definitely worth giving a go.
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September 17, 2023Mila and the Bone Man is an engrossing story that traces the life trajectory of the central character, Mila, from her early childhood in rural north New Zealand, through a long journey of self-discovery and healing, till she returns home as a mature adult, now a healer herself. Always nearby, offering support, and the wisdom of a seer, is her lifelong friend, Tommy, whose knowledge ultimately holds to key to Mila's redemption.
Mila and the Bone Man demonstrates how old wisdom and new are equally valuable in navigating the challenges one faces; how knowledge of ways of being and understanding and healing all have their place, no matter which culture they spring from.
Lauren's writing is lyrical and absorbing, almost hypnotic in it's flow, as she draws the reader expertly into Mila's world, tracing her personal journey from guilt and confusion to clarity and closure. The Northland setting which dominates the start and the end of the book is beautifully evoked and underscores the healing power of nature and the natural world.
This is a beautiful, compulsive read that will leave you with the sense that truth will out and good will prevail, no matter how long and hard the journey.
Mila and the Bone Man demonstrates how old wisdom and new are equally valuable in navigating the challenges one faces; how knowledge of ways of being and understanding and healing all have their place, no matter which culture they spring from.
Lauren's writing is lyrical and absorbing, almost hypnotic in it's flow, as she draws the reader expertly into Mila's world, tracing her personal journey from guilt and confusion to clarity and closure. The Northland setting which dominates the start and the end of the book is beautifully evoked and underscores the healing power of nature and the natural world.
This is a beautiful, compulsive read that will leave you with the sense that truth will out and good will prevail, no matter how long and hard the journey.
September 11, 2023
A very nicely written story that will appeal top those who appreciate the beauty of language. The story itself deals with a number of themes including family, loss and the natural world contrasted with the scientific.
Perhaps the story lacks the punch for five stars but Mila's journey is an engaging one. Doctors are in league with the drug companies and the idea of alternative medicine replacing them is never really explored to any great depth.
A distinctly New Zealand story that can be recommended.
Perhaps the story lacks the punch for five stars but Mila's journey is an engaging one. Doctors are in league with the drug companies and the idea of alternative medicine replacing them is never really explored to any great depth.
A distinctly New Zealand story that can be recommended.
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January 24, 2024Review just posted - Mila and the Bone Man, Lauren Roche.
https://www.austcrimefiction.org/revi...
A very different sort of crime / coming of age novel exploring consequences and difference.
https://www.austcrimefiction.org/revi...
A very different sort of crime / coming of age novel exploring consequences and difference.
February 18, 2023
This is a phenomenal and affective novel. It is a beautiful story, well told.
November 18, 2022
I ended up really enjoying this book even though I almost gave up when I encountered the stilted prose at the beginning. The narrative dealt with some tragic circumstances and the story flowed particularly well when tragedy occurred. Mila was an unlikeable character but then she had to deal with unthinkable things and avoided her emotions. She annoyed me in so many ways.
The other characters seemed a bit superficially woven - as if there was more we could have known about them. The descriptions of the bush and traditional plant medicines were of particular interest. As a reader, I felt like a voyeur - although the story drew me in and it was engaging, I didn't feel as if I was 'deeply immersed in' the story or experiencing the characters' lives. Perhaps it was the unbalanced interplay of description and action that caused this - 'too much telling and not enough showing/doing'. The chapters where the Bone Man's perspective was given helped to explain things but also took away a lot of tension and mystery. Worth a read.
The other characters seemed a bit superficially woven - as if there was more we could have known about them. The descriptions of the bush and traditional plant medicines were of particular interest. As a reader, I felt like a voyeur - although the story drew me in and it was engaging, I didn't feel as if I was 'deeply immersed in' the story or experiencing the characters' lives. Perhaps it was the unbalanced interplay of description and action that caused this - 'too much telling and not enough showing/doing'. The chapters where the Bone Man's perspective was given helped to explain things but also took away a lot of tension and mystery. Worth a read.
January 1, 2023
Go and buy this book!!! Book recommendation!!
I spent the first six hours of my 2023 reading this book cover to cover. I couldn’t put it down. I simply couldn’t stop reading. I walked to the toilet whilst still reading because it was the only way I could bring myself to wee. I’ve burnt my armpits from holding it up whilst reading in the sun.
This is one of the most beautifully written stories I’ve ever read; told with tenderness, with grace and with a deep rooted theme of our connection to nature and to rongoā majestically weaved throughout. I experienced the spectrum of human emotions. And that was just the first chapter.
The added bonus for me is the author is a woman who I have admired, respected and loved for several years. After reading this book I am now in utter awe.
She’s created art.
I spent the first six hours of my 2023 reading this book cover to cover. I couldn’t put it down. I simply couldn’t stop reading. I walked to the toilet whilst still reading because it was the only way I could bring myself to wee. I’ve burnt my armpits from holding it up whilst reading in the sun.
This is one of the most beautifully written stories I’ve ever read; told with tenderness, with grace and with a deep rooted theme of our connection to nature and to rongoā majestically weaved throughout. I experienced the spectrum of human emotions. And that was just the first chapter.
The added bonus for me is the author is a woman who I have admired, respected and loved for several years. After reading this book I am now in utter awe.
She’s created art.
August 7, 2025
At a time when so much is wrong in the world, Lauren's story about Mila shows us how we can heal. First, we consciously choose to lean into the creative wisdom of others. Then we look deeply into the flawed hearts of well-crafted characters and ask them what else they have to show us. We follow them into Mother Earth's sacred places and put our ears to the ground when they do.
Lauren has found a way to show us that all is not lost, even in the deepest of tragedies. Within the subtext, she also tells us that what we have believed is not the whole truth. Medicine is only part of the truth, and as a medical colleague, I concur.
Thank you for weaving a story that has such a deep regard for whenua and tikanga Lauren. Thank you for swapping pharmaceuticals for the healing power of creativity and story.
Thank you for Mila x
Lauren has found a way to show us that all is not lost, even in the deepest of tragedies. Within the subtext, she also tells us that what we have believed is not the whole truth. Medicine is only part of the truth, and as a medical colleague, I concur.
Thank you for weaving a story that has such a deep regard for whenua and tikanga Lauren. Thank you for swapping pharmaceuticals for the healing power of creativity and story.
Thank you for Mila x
September 7, 2026
This book is very confronting and triggering. Thought provoking and heartbreaking! Although written by a non-Māori wahine, it encapsulates te ao Māori, rongoa Māori, and the generational traumas that can begin or end with us. I found this to be wonderfully written. The first book I have read based in NZ since forever, and I found parts of it almost too relatable. I was stuck between not being able to continue at one point, and then not being able to put it down. My heart broke over and over again for Mila and her whānau. If you are an Empath, I wouldn’t recommend reading this!
November 30, 2025
Mila and the Boneman is a dark, atmospheric tale that blends mystery, two cultures and emotional depth into a story that lingers long after the final page. As she searches for answers about her own and family’s past she uncovers more secrets then finds meaning.
Mila and the Boneman is a gripping, imaginative story that offers both shivers and soul.
Hard to put down - a true page turner. Highly recommend :)
Mila and the Boneman is a gripping, imaginative story that offers both shivers and soul.
Hard to put down - a true page turner. Highly recommend :)
February 23, 2023
Gritty yet tender, tragic yet uplifting, this novel traces the impact of an accident on Mila, her family, and their neighbour, the enigmatic Bone Man. Secrets, guilt and forgiveness lie at the heart of Mila’s story, along with the healing potency of love and land. A novel to savour and recommend to friends.
August 9, 2023
Absolutely loved Lauren Roche's literary debut - 'Mila and the Bone Man'. Such a beautifully written story about the power of healing, forgiveness and family secrets. The characters and lush bush setting come alive on each page. The words are haunting, almost lyrical at times. This is the kind of story where the characters will remain with me for a long time to come.
October 21, 2023
Read in the context of a shared reading group; the book is well written with an authentic Kiwi turn of phrase and portrayal of contemporary society. It is an engrossing and poignant story, addressing themes of loss, guilt, forgiveness, love, wellbeing and belonging; weaving Aotearoa and European mythology, as well as and traditional healing methods. Definitely a gem.
March 3, 2025
Picked this at random from a NZ Section in a bookstore. After reading, I think it may have been targeted toward YA. Part way through I was disappointed thinking it would be a typical "blame the Mom" storyline, but it partially redeemed that only to resolve in a morally gray way that was fairly well projected early on. I liked the idea of merging the two cultures through medicine.
March 3, 2023
A gloriously written story that takes you back the New Zealand I used to know. The characters are alive and plot their own destiny. If you want a read that you can slip into and forget you're reading, this is one I highly recommend.
March 26, 2023
Mila is a wonderful story, a remarkable debut novel. The power of the forest, of healing after hurt and suffering. The themes are timeless and powerfully evoked. I loved this book and can't wait to see what her next novel brings.
April 15, 2023
I enjoyed this novel, it’s about guilt, forgiveness and finding your way home.
I enjoyed the interweaving of the Croatian /Maori culture with medicine and herbs , and the healing of hearts and land, set in Northland NZ.
A beautiful read.
I enjoyed the interweaving of the Croatian /Maori culture with medicine and herbs , and the healing of hearts and land, set in Northland NZ.
A beautiful read.
June 24, 2025
It felt like there was alot of meaning behind the characters and their actions but Lauren came and talked to our english class and I felt that I was reading into it abit more than intended. Still a decent book but I wouldn't pick it for myself.
November 3, 2022
Beautifully written and well-researched book which will stay in the mind and heart for a long time.
December 22, 2022
One of my best reads ever. I felt totally immersed ronga into the feelings of Mila the bush and medicinal healing with native plants.
March 13, 2023
This was one of the best books I have read in a long time. Once I started reading I could not put it down
Displaying 1 - 30 of 39 reviews