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This Is How We Do It: A Pep Talk
Entertainment icon Kevin Hart, the number one New York Times bestselling author of I Can’t Make This Up: Life Lessons, shares fifteen heartfelt lessons about harnessing your potential in the here and now.
YOU CAN DO IT.
You’ve heard this advice before. Yes, of course you have. It’s straight out of the self-help bible.
But wait. Are you ready to hear it from a guy who’s made so many mistakes he could fill eighteen other books about them? A guy who went to community college for exactly two weeks and earned a degree in nothing? A guy who wore long tights for a marathon?
That’s this guy: Kevin Hart. He wants to share some lessons he’s learned along the way—lessons that helped him get to where he is now. He wants to talk to you about “what-is-ness,” “cowboying up,” and “teddy bearing.”
No idea what those are? Don’t worry. That’s why you’re here. In this funny, heartfelt collection of pep talks, Kevin Hart reveals the power of a positive mindset.
In this book, the tables are turned. Kevin Hart isn’t just a box office juggernaut and superstar comedian.
He’s your biggest fan.
Adapted from The Decision.
YOU CAN DO IT.
You’ve heard this advice before. Yes, of course you have. It’s straight out of the self-help bible.
But wait. Are you ready to hear it from a guy who’s made so many mistakes he could fill eighteen other books about them? A guy who went to community college for exactly two weeks and earned a degree in nothing? A guy who wore long tights for a marathon?
That’s this guy: Kevin Hart. He wants to share some lessons he’s learned along the way—lessons that helped him get to where he is now. He wants to talk to you about “what-is-ness,” “cowboying up,” and “teddy bearing.”
No idea what those are? Don’t worry. That’s why you’re here. In this funny, heartfelt collection of pep talks, Kevin Hart reveals the power of a positive mindset.
In this book, the tables are turned. Kevin Hart isn’t just a box office juggernaut and superstar comedian.
He’s your biggest fan.
Adapted from The Decision.
66 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 1, 2022
3408 people are currently reading
7215 people want to read
About the author
Kevin Hart
8 books640 followersKevin Hart is an award-winning actor and comedian. His films, including Central Intelligence, Think Like a Man, Get Hard, Ride Along, The Wedding Ringer, and The Secret Life of Pets have earned over $3.5 billion at the box office. His stand-up comedy tours, including Let Me Explain, Laugh at My Pain, and What Now?, have sold out arenas and football stadiums, leading Forbes to name him the “king of comedy.” He is also the first comedian with a Nike sneaker line; a television producer, creating the BET show Real Husbands of Hollywood and the Laugh Out Loud Network; and CEO of Hartbeat Productions. Hart currently lives in Los Angeles with his family.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 425 reviews
December 16, 2022
3,7 *
This book is exactly what it says on the cover a pep talk 🙂 I felt after reading it like I just had a great conversation with a good friend. Is it something new and ground breaking awww no 🤣🤣🙂 but it is a great reminder and a good read to start your new year strong 💪 🥰
This book is exactly what it says on the cover a pep talk 🙂 I felt after reading it like I just had a great conversation with a good friend. Is it something new and ground breaking awww no 🤣🤣🙂 but it is a great reminder and a good read to start your new year strong 💪 🥰
December 31, 2023
This was a very motivating and inspirational essay written by Kevin Hart that I really enjoyed reading. He is by far one of my most favorite comedians, and I admire his intellect as much as I do his jokes and stories.
*Free for Amazon Prime members*
I'd like to think I'm generally a mentally strong person given the things I've been through in my life, but this essay definitely indicated that I have some room to grow!Yet I was very proud to see that I already think a lot of the ways that Kevin Hart suggested, though I only wish I had more opportunities coming my way. I always work hard and stay open to broadening my horizons; however, I'm not much of a people person unless I'm forced to be which often ends up leaving me without many new opportunities because often times knowing the right person can really be a life changer.
"Success, they say, is where preparation meets opportunity."
(Exactly what I was trying to say above!)
"We are living in the most shit-talking time in human history."
(Yep, thank you social media! I blame that for a lot of the problems we now have as a society. I tried to jump on the social media bandwagon years ago but quickly realized it only made my negativity soar. So thank you, but no thank you.)
"Because all your major downs in life are just preparing you for the major ups."
(Ain't that the truth! My health struggles alone have taught me that - all the time I spent suffering with no promises of any treatments led me to being barely able to walk and living in daily chronic pain in my late 20s to now finally becoming this active person who has discovered my own strength. I'm working at it every single day still trying everything out there to make me feel better and believing in it every step of the way. All the times I was stuck in the downs have made every little achievement (no matter how small) that much sweeter and richer to me. Some days I feel like I'm worth a million dollars - I'm so happy with my accomplishments! But I've never been one to give up no matter how hard things have become. I always just keep pushing myself and telling myself I can't stop because I'm here to learn something. Here to grow. I have no choice but to pick up the broken pieces, pack them up, and hobble forward no matter what happens just to be ready for what comes next.)
"A positive mindset isn’t about feeling like you’ve got sunshine and rainbows on the inside all the time. Sometimes you need to move through harder feelings and tougher times. But throughout that, positivity means not collapsing and giving in to feeling resigned and defeated."
(Best explanation ever!!)
"Consistency is important not just because it takes time to create change but because it gives your mind an opportunity to see new results—to see what you’re capable of—"
(This year I've started my own personal fitness journey, and this is so true!! I keep reminding myself consistentency is the KEY!)
"Are you the person who, if we all gotta get on an airplane, we gotta lie to you and tell you the plane is taking off two hours earlier? Are you that person? Are you the person who, if we’re all gonna meet up for dinner, we gotta lie to you and say dinner’s at six o’clock when it’s really at nine because we know you ain’t gonna get there?"
(Thank you, Kevin for giving me this idea to use on my sister! She is notoriously one of THOSE people lol, and it personally drives me insane!)
"Because when you feel comfortable, you relax. When you relax, you get lazy. When you get lazy, life passes you by."
(So true! It's so easy to get lazy. Too easy. But I've learned relaxing means so much more after you work hard and accomplish something! And you CAN do both!)
I recommend this quick read to everyone. You may just learn a thing or two or surprise yourself at how much you already do incorporate on a daily basis in your life! Kevin Hart is a living walking example of success. I seriously had to go back and watch some of his Netflix comedy shows while reading this book because I kept hearing his voice reading the book to me lol!
*Free for Amazon Prime members*
I'd like to think I'm generally a mentally strong person given the things I've been through in my life, but this essay definitely indicated that I have some room to grow!Yet I was very proud to see that I already think a lot of the ways that Kevin Hart suggested, though I only wish I had more opportunities coming my way. I always work hard and stay open to broadening my horizons; however, I'm not much of a people person unless I'm forced to be which often ends up leaving me without many new opportunities because often times knowing the right person can really be a life changer.
"Success, they say, is where preparation meets opportunity."
(Exactly what I was trying to say above!)
"We are living in the most shit-talking time in human history."
(Yep, thank you social media! I blame that for a lot of the problems we now have as a society. I tried to jump on the social media bandwagon years ago but quickly realized it only made my negativity soar. So thank you, but no thank you.)
"Because all your major downs in life are just preparing you for the major ups."
(Ain't that the truth! My health struggles alone have taught me that - all the time I spent suffering with no promises of any treatments led me to being barely able to walk and living in daily chronic pain in my late 20s to now finally becoming this active person who has discovered my own strength. I'm working at it every single day still trying everything out there to make me feel better and believing in it every step of the way. All the times I was stuck in the downs have made every little achievement (no matter how small) that much sweeter and richer to me. Some days I feel like I'm worth a million dollars - I'm so happy with my accomplishments! But I've never been one to give up no matter how hard things have become. I always just keep pushing myself and telling myself I can't stop because I'm here to learn something. Here to grow. I have no choice but to pick up the broken pieces, pack them up, and hobble forward no matter what happens just to be ready for what comes next.)
"A positive mindset isn’t about feeling like you’ve got sunshine and rainbows on the inside all the time. Sometimes you need to move through harder feelings and tougher times. But throughout that, positivity means not collapsing and giving in to feeling resigned and defeated."
(Best explanation ever!!)
"Consistency is important not just because it takes time to create change but because it gives your mind an opportunity to see new results—to see what you’re capable of—"
(This year I've started my own personal fitness journey, and this is so true!! I keep reminding myself consistentency is the KEY!)
"Are you the person who, if we all gotta get on an airplane, we gotta lie to you and tell you the plane is taking off two hours earlier? Are you that person? Are you the person who, if we’re all gonna meet up for dinner, we gotta lie to you and say dinner’s at six o’clock when it’s really at nine because we know you ain’t gonna get there?"
(Thank you, Kevin for giving me this idea to use on my sister! She is notoriously one of THOSE people lol, and it personally drives me insane!)
"Because when you feel comfortable, you relax. When you relax, you get lazy. When you get lazy, life passes you by."
(So true! It's so easy to get lazy. Too easy. But I've learned relaxing means so much more after you work hard and accomplish something! And you CAN do both!)
I recommend this quick read to everyone. You may just learn a thing or two or surprise yourself at how much you already do incorporate on a daily basis in your life! Kevin Hart is a living walking example of success. I seriously had to go back and watch some of his Netflix comedy shows while reading this book because I kept hearing his voice reading the book to me lol!
November 16, 2022
A Pep Talk by Kevin Hart
Review of the Amazon Original Stories Kindle eBook (November 1, 2022)
Actor & comedian Kevin Hart seems to have quite a separate career with his self-help / life lesson books. This Is How We Do It takes the form of a short 66 page 'pep talk' broken into "Fifteen Tools For Your Best Life", often with slightly obscure titles (which are eventually explained) such as 'What-Is-Ness' (meaning accept what is that you can't change), 'Cowboying Up' (accept responsibility), 'Sponginess' (soak up knowledge) etc.
It mostly reads like common sense, but it is still affirming to have it all listed in quick order, and certainly Hart's own career success is a good example of it working.
A segment makes it seem as if this was originally an audiobook, Hart refers to the listener perhaps hearing his stomach growling, but no such audiobook yet exists. Perhaps a future release yet to come.
Trivia and Link
You can watch for current and past Amazon Original Kindle short stories at an Amazon page here (Link goes to Amazon US, adjust for your own country or region).
Review of the Amazon Original Stories Kindle eBook (November 1, 2022)
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. - Maya Angelou (used as the epigraph for this book).
Actor & comedian Kevin Hart seems to have quite a separate career with his self-help / life lesson books. This Is How We Do It takes the form of a short 66 page 'pep talk' broken into "Fifteen Tools For Your Best Life", often with slightly obscure titles (which are eventually explained) such as 'What-Is-Ness' (meaning accept what is that you can't change), 'Cowboying Up' (accept responsibility), 'Sponginess' (soak up knowledge) etc.
It mostly reads like common sense, but it is still affirming to have it all listed in quick order, and certainly Hart's own career success is a good example of it working.
A segment makes it seem as if this was originally an audiobook, Hart refers to the listener perhaps hearing his stomach growling, but no such audiobook yet exists. Perhaps a future release yet to come.
Trivia and Link
You can watch for current and past Amazon Original Kindle short stories at an Amazon page here (Link goes to Amazon US, adjust for your own country or region).
November 14, 2022
This was a quick, fun read, and it actually made me want to make some changes in my life. I am what I call a "Pessimistic optimist"....I usually have an optimistic outlook, meaning I hope for the best, but I certainly expect, and prepare for, the worst.
Reading this book has made me want to adopt a more outward optimism, and to share that optimism with those around me. I also need to work on accepting how things are, and dealing with them on their own terms, rather than wallowing in "Why me?" thoughts.
I thought I would get a few laughs out of this book (I did!), but Kevin Hart actually inspired me to make some changes for the better.
Reading this book has made me want to adopt a more outward optimism, and to share that optimism with those around me. I also need to work on accepting how things are, and dealing with them on their own terms, rather than wallowing in "Why me?" thoughts.
I thought I would get a few laughs out of this book (I did!), but Kevin Hart actually inspired me to make some changes for the better.
December 22, 2022
I didn’t read this I just thought it would be funny to give it five stars
October 28, 2022
This book is pretty timely in my life right now. I already have in mind who I'm going to recommend this to. :)
I found lots of highlightable passages & thoughts and great 'gems' or "Golden, crisp chicken nuggets" of information. There's lots of stuff you've probably already read/ heard but this is laid out well into 15 chapters or lessons. Some with hilariously awesome titles: "Teddy Bearing" "What-is-ness" and others. This book felt really relatable to me. And bonus, it is a super quick read.
Really how else can you read this but in Kevin's voice in your head, lol. That's certainly how it came across in my head while reading; And I'm pleased to see he is doing the audiobook! I can't wait to grab that.
I'm hovering around a 3.5-3.75 ish so I rounded up.
Thanks to Amazon & Kevin Hart via Netgalley for the early copy to read and review.
I found lots of highlightable passages & thoughts and great 'gems' or "Golden, crisp chicken nuggets" of information. There's lots of stuff you've probably already read/ heard but this is laid out well into 15 chapters or lessons. Some with hilariously awesome titles: "Teddy Bearing" "What-is-ness" and others. This book felt really relatable to me. And bonus, it is a super quick read.
Really how else can you read this but in Kevin's voice in your head, lol. That's certainly how it came across in my head while reading; And I'm pleased to see he is doing the audiobook! I can't wait to grab that.
I'm hovering around a 3.5-3.75 ish so I rounded up.
Thanks to Amazon & Kevin Hart via Netgalley for the early copy to read and review.
December 14, 2022
I want to rate the book a 5 but some of the writing could have been better. That being said, “it is what it is” and neither Kevin nor I have the ability to create a Time Machine and change the past so there is no reason to dwell on it. Honestly a lot of chicken nuggets in this book worth picking up and digesting!
January 23, 2023
Wow!
As I read and came across some of the cuss words, I cringed, bc I don’t speak those words or entertain them from others. Then I realized that my age group and background R possibly not his intended audience.
But could I use the advise Kevin was sharing, in his own style, that was to build up and not tear down? Oh yes. I can use them for myself and can share them. Will share them in a more sanitized version.
I was taught these same things by my grandmother and other elders in the family, as I was growing up. And I taught them to my son, but I’m sure Kevin’s style is more modern and effective with the younger generation.
I’m so proud of Kevin for writing this book. And making it a fun read. But when I meet him I’m gonna wash his mouth out with soap.
If I ever meet him. And no, I really wouldn’t.
As I read and came across some of the cuss words, I cringed, bc I don’t speak those words or entertain them from others. Then I realized that my age group and background R possibly not his intended audience.
But could I use the advise Kevin was sharing, in his own style, that was to build up and not tear down? Oh yes. I can use them for myself and can share them. Will share them in a more sanitized version.
I was taught these same things by my grandmother and other elders in the family, as I was growing up. And I taught them to my son, but I’m sure Kevin’s style is more modern and effective with the younger generation.
I’m so proud of Kevin for writing this book. And making it a fun read. But when I meet him I’m gonna wash his mouth out with soap.
If I ever meet him. And no, I really wouldn’t.
January 20, 2023
Kevin Hart is real. He doesn’t mince words. He concisely shares key messages for life with a sprinkling of his experiences, told in his humorous style. Love it!!
I found this little book a fun reminder of realistic ways to live a good life!
I found this little book a fun reminder of realistic ways to live a good life!
December 17, 2022
Who knew? I have to admit when I I found this book in the library I thought it was gonna be a typical Kevin Hart comedy. Boy was I wrong.
It has advice for life well lived. Granted the language is quite often off-color. That is Kevin, I guess.
Fantastic book I thoroughly enjoyed.
It has advice for life well lived. Granted the language is quite often off-color. That is Kevin, I guess.
Fantastic book I thoroughly enjoyed.
January 20, 2023
What a great pep talk! This was a fun, easy read with so much good advice.
November 1, 2022
Not sure how anyone could get through this without hearing Kevin’s voice in their head. This is a super quick read with 15 life lessons. I think some will immediately resonate with most, whereas others will marinate over days of thinking back up what was read. Kevin writes in a way that is easy to consume to the average reader. I think this is a great pivot point for someone needing a kick in the rear to change some life habits.
November 13, 2022
Wasn't sure what this book was (or why it was free via Amazon Prime) but enjoyed Hart's take on self-improvement or life optimization. I think it would have been even better if narrated by Hart but I appreciated his 15 life lessons that he kept sharing "nuggets" that "just naturally drop out of [his] butt."
Energy flows where attention goes, and some of that attention is just emboldening the negative forces in the world. There are many reasons for this, but one is because people who can’t get positive attention often opt for negative attention, rather than getting no attention at all (p4).
For me, there’s no such thing as relaxation. Simply because there is no such thing as being comfortable. I want you to understand that the guy who you are listening to right now, who you may think is a machine and goes harder than anybody else, or just talks about going non-fucking-stop—I want you to really understand that I do get after it. I truly want you to understand that success is earned. It’s not given (p5).
For me, there’s no such thing as relaxation. Simply because there is no such thing as being comfortable. I want you to understand that the guy who you are listening to right now, who you may think is a machine and goes harder than anybody else, or just talks about going non-fucking-stop—I want you to really understand that I do get after it. I truly want you to understand that success is earned. It’s not given.
Here are some of the questions I ask myself: What am I building? What is the endgame? And when I get to the endgame, is it really the end? When I die, what will other people talk about? What will the conversation be like? What is the legacy I’m leaving for my children?
When you feel safe, like you can protect yourself, you will be willing to journey further into the unknown and take on bigger risks. So these tools are not just for preparation—they’ll also lead to more opportunity.
** [1] Positive Mindset
No matter what you are trying to do, you’re going to face negativity. In the age of the internet, negativity surrounds us constantly. Even if it’s not about you, it’s bathing your brain in stress.
Our default setting is usually to move through our days like our internal states are automatic functions of cause and effect, and we’re at the mercy of them. You wake up, feel a certain way, and that’s it—that’s your baseline for the day. But every moment brings a decision.
Negativity (when it’s not processed) is completely unproductive. It does nothing for you. It gets you nowhere. It brings you and other people down. I really want you to see that.
This is one of the biggest things that trips people up: making speed bumps out to be mountains.
This guy Napoleon Hill had a beautiful spin on the moments when things don’t work out the way you planned and unexpected hardship falls on you. Instead of coming from a negative place and looking at those moments as a “failure,” he called them “temporary defeats.” Damn. Do you feel the difference in that? One has a period that weighs a thousand pounds. Failure. End of story. The other has momentum. You hear the words and immediately know that the story isn’t over. You’re left waiting for the next line.
The gravity of this world will pull you toward a negative mindset 99 percent of the time. The constant static of negativity is deafening. But it’s completely fucking useless. It’s just noise. It nurtures self-doubt, judgment, and comparison.
I want my kids to be mentally strong—that’s what’s important. Because you can have it all and not have a good mindset, and that all will be lost. It’ll be lost, because you will be easily affected. And if you’re easily affected, that’s a really tough thing, because that’s what people prey on.
** [2] What-is-ness (acceptance)
What-is-ness is accepting everything for what it is. When shit inevitably happens: it is what it is. You are at peace with the nature of this new reality.
There’s stimulus and then there’s response. What people put between the two is their story and opinion about the stimulus, which fucks up the way they respond. It doesn’t matter if you dislike something that happened, or find it inconvenient or uncomfortable. The only thing that’s true is that it happened. Now what are you going to do about it? Get with what is. Ditch your stories and judgments about what is, and just be with it. Work with it. Move with it. Anything less than that is a complete goddamn waste of your time. All you would be doing is indulging negativity and staying stuck.
People create so much friction and agitation in themselves by not accepting the reality of their situation. They want to be in denial about it, or be right about it, or wish it was different. Well, it ain’t. And you’re probably not right. And you’re definitely wasting your motherfucking time.
People can spend days and even years complaining about something that happened to them or why something is the way it is. It hasn’t even occurred to them to drop the ultimately self-harming tools of blame and victimhood. How dare life inconvenience me! Oh Lord, what did I do to deserve this?! Why me?! They’re acting like entitled, stubborn-ass boulders, not water. They’re stuck in a fixed position. Inflexible. Immovable in all the wrong ways. Thinking they deserve something different or better than what they’ve been given.
Sometimes there isn’t anything to do but just sit there and take it. Some of the things that are in life aren’t problems to be solved but realities to allow.
** [3] Consistency (beats intensity)
Especially when it comes to trying to improve your health and wellness, consistency is the goal, more than a single great day or performance. We are in a realm of incremental change, where patience and good habits pay off.
Being consistent in new behaviors creates proof positive that you’re an independent, powerful, creative, strong, functional person. Without consistency, there’s also no improvement and learning. There’s nothing to pivot from and get leverage to the next level. There’s no opportunity to reflect on prior executions. There’s no refinement.
Consistency defends against the frequent funks that come from losing momentum.
** [4] Reliability
To be reliable means having an impeccable relationship with your time and obligations. When you tell someone you’ll do something or you’ll be somewhere, you follow through and back it up with action.
What does it take to be reliable? You have to have a sharp awareness of your schedule and commitments because you have to know what you can and can’t do. In order to deliver on things and show up places, you have to control the amount of things you take on. You have to have the courage and self-respect to be able to say no. A lot of people don’t know how to sit in the uncomfortable position of telling people that simple word. They’re so afraid to disappoint others or never learned to stand up for themselves, and they just say “sure” to every request that gets thrown at them. They don’t know what they want or what they stand for. What they’re left with is a graveyard of broken promises and half-assed results. They’re overwhelmed and can’t fully give themselves to any one thing.
Being on time is the key to success not just in any job but in everything.
You know who else relies on you? Children. If you have kids, reliability is that much more important. Your life is already an important and good enough reason to be mastering your mental. But if you have other little lives and minds depending on your mental game, you’d better develop some reliability. Everything you do is a demonstration of how to live life. Everything leaves an imprint. If you don’t show up for them, they don’t feel like they matter. And that’s the ultimate message any kid is constantly trying to get from their caregivers: “I matter.” How well you deliver that message has more lifelong impact than anyone wants to admit. Your kids can look back and say, “Was Mom/Dad there for me or not? Did they really care?” Your mental game informs their own mental game in life and how they feel about themselves. How you decide to show up in life impacts a whole lot more than just you.
** [5] Determination
We can all get this kind of resolve. So if you don’t have it today, that doesn’t mean that you can’t have it tomorrow. Be determined to get determination.
** [6] Cowboying up (owning up to mistakes and saying sorry)
Transformation starts there—with ownership. You can’t change shit if you don’t own it first.
What people don’t realize is that discomfort is temporary. What happens after that discomfort is the immense sense of power and freedom that comes from having been able to do something about it, to be able to replace things that aren’t working with things that will.
When you take ownership of something, the subtext you’re really delivering is, “Hey, I’m not perfect, and I’ll never pretend to be. But I care about my integrity and my relationships enough to admit when I’m wrong and make it better. I’m not going to lie, and I’m strong enough to handle any repercussions. I acknowledge my sovereign power to decide, and I will never surrender that.”
** [7] Teddy Bearing (being likeable)
So “teddy bearing” just means being likable, personable, and pleasant. I just figured it would get your attention more than any of those other words would.
** [8] Dissatisfaction (motivation to improve your lot)
If you’re not living in a state of growth, then you’re acting like you’re on your way out, and your emotions will follow suit. You might have already noticed that happen when you’re living your life from a place of stagnation. It does not feel good.
If you want to keep growing, expanding, and improving, then you’ll need a little hint of dissatisfaction in the back of your mind. If you’re not just a little dissatisfied, you’ll never push past your familiar limits and do bigger, better things.
It’s not that what you do isn’t good enough. It is. You are. It’s just that you love the feeling of getting even better over time. It’s addicting. It breeds happiness. Living with a little dissatisfaction engages the circuitry in our brains that’s wired to reward us for seeking novelty and moving forward.
Happiness is knowing that you haven’t reached your limit, that you’re capable of more. That’s happiness. If you’re done, that’s not happiness. You can be happy knowing that you haven’t reached your full potential yet, because there’s so much more to give. That is happiness. If you’re done, that’s death.
** [9] Nonreactivity
The world is constantly trying to get a rise out of you and spark a negative reaction.
You lose your cool, which means losing the power that comes from being able to perceive accurately, think clearly, and respond intentionally.
People spew negativity for a reaction. That’s the only reason behind it. They’re looking for a reaction. If you give that, then you feed into it.
Nobody has anything on you unless you give it to them. Your emotions, your response, your anger—those are all things controlled by you. When you’re nonreactive, people are wasting their time when they try to fuck with you.
** [10] Self-Generating Power (motivation)
To truly succeed, you have to be your own power source. Waiting for energy and motivation from the outside is a loser’s strategy.
Work still has to be done regardless of the people you put around you, because anything that you do, you need to be proud of. You gotta be happy with your effort. You gotta know that you put 100 percent into it.
Your future rests on no one else’s shoulders but your own. So learn to carry a bigger load, and you’ll have a bigger life.
** [11] Sponginess (lifetime of learning)
Eagerly soak up knowledge from people around you and those who are better at what you’re trying to do. An insatiable curiosity about the thought processes and execution strategies of other successful people will serve you endlessly.
I wouldn’t know to promote movies outside the fucking country if it weren’t for Will Smith and Tom Cruise. They promoted movies like nobody’s business all over the world. They embraced their fans in every territory. That’s why they became global successes. So when you look at Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson and you look at me, we go fucking everywhere when it comes to promoting a movie. That’s because we’re following the blueprint that was given, and we understand the importance of showing your fans that you love them. You show that by getting your ass on a plane and traveling eighteen hours to go to a red-carpet event, and shake hands and say hello. It goes a long way. I wouldn’t know that if I didn’t soak up that information when it was given.
The smartest person in the room never says they’re the smartest person in the room. The smartest person in the room lets everybody talk, and they listen so they can get even smarter. The smartest person in the room is the spongiest. Facts.
** [12] Relatability
Being able to carry conversations and make connections with a greater range of people opens up doors to ideas and opportunities you wouldn’t otherwise have if you stayed narrow minded.
** [13] Eyes-on-the-prize-ness (goal setting and focus)
You can’t keep your eyes on something you haven’t defined. And that’s one of the biggest problems for most people: they don’t know what they’re after. Or they’re chasing after someone else’s prize without an authentic hunger in their belly for it.
But one of the quickest ways to get closer to learning what you authentically want is through the contrast of experiencing what you don’t want and what doesn’t work. It’s a process of trial and error, but there are no shortcuts. Sometimes you’re possessed by an idea of what your prize could be, and you’ll never know if it’s the one until you start moving toward it, or once you have it in your hands and feel nothing inside.
One of the biggest things that takes people’s eyes off their prize is comparison. Because people often aren’t solid in themselves and don’t have their mental game right, they’re constantly looking around wondering, How do I look? Do they think I’m cool? Do they like where I’m headed? Is it going to get me laid? What are they doing? Shit, maybe that’s what I should be doing too.
The other thing that takes my eyes off the prize is wasting my time staring at the obstacles in my way.
Your ability to succeed and accomplish your goals is directly dependent on your ability to deal with adversity and time.
** [14] Put-up-with-ness (determination)
Legends and champions are willing to put up with more discomfort than other people. They’re willing to make big sacrifices to get what they want.
Flip the frame like this: it’s not even about putting up with discomfort, it’s about refusing to put up with comfort. I refuse to allow mediocrity. I refuse to put up with anything less than my best.
** [15] Humility
Success can be a drug. It can take hold of you and turn you into a junkie, lead you to do things you don’t want to, and turn you into a person you don’t want to be. When it comes to getting wealth or the spotlight, a lot of people want it. But very few can handle it and maintain their sense of self and sanity.
Other people’s opinions of you—positive or negative—don’t mean shit. And what you have doesn’t mean shit either if it’s about putting on a show and not rooted in what makes you feel happy and whole. No matter what you achieve and accomplish, you’re not better than anyone else. You do what you do because you want to do it.
Energy flows where attention goes, and some of that attention is just emboldening the negative forces in the world. There are many reasons for this, but one is because people who can’t get positive attention often opt for negative attention, rather than getting no attention at all (p4).
For me, there’s no such thing as relaxation. Simply because there is no such thing as being comfortable. I want you to understand that the guy who you are listening to right now, who you may think is a machine and goes harder than anybody else, or just talks about going non-fucking-stop—I want you to really understand that I do get after it. I truly want you to understand that success is earned. It’s not given (p5).
For me, there’s no such thing as relaxation. Simply because there is no such thing as being comfortable. I want you to understand that the guy who you are listening to right now, who you may think is a machine and goes harder than anybody else, or just talks about going non-fucking-stop—I want you to really understand that I do get after it. I truly want you to understand that success is earned. It’s not given.
Here are some of the questions I ask myself: What am I building? What is the endgame? And when I get to the endgame, is it really the end? When I die, what will other people talk about? What will the conversation be like? What is the legacy I’m leaving for my children?
When you feel safe, like you can protect yourself, you will be willing to journey further into the unknown and take on bigger risks. So these tools are not just for preparation—they’ll also lead to more opportunity.
** [1] Positive Mindset
No matter what you are trying to do, you’re going to face negativity. In the age of the internet, negativity surrounds us constantly. Even if it’s not about you, it’s bathing your brain in stress.
Our default setting is usually to move through our days like our internal states are automatic functions of cause and effect, and we’re at the mercy of them. You wake up, feel a certain way, and that’s it—that’s your baseline for the day. But every moment brings a decision.
Negativity (when it’s not processed) is completely unproductive. It does nothing for you. It gets you nowhere. It brings you and other people down. I really want you to see that.
This is one of the biggest things that trips people up: making speed bumps out to be mountains.
This guy Napoleon Hill had a beautiful spin on the moments when things don’t work out the way you planned and unexpected hardship falls on you. Instead of coming from a negative place and looking at those moments as a “failure,” he called them “temporary defeats.” Damn. Do you feel the difference in that? One has a period that weighs a thousand pounds. Failure. End of story. The other has momentum. You hear the words and immediately know that the story isn’t over. You’re left waiting for the next line.
The gravity of this world will pull you toward a negative mindset 99 percent of the time. The constant static of negativity is deafening. But it’s completely fucking useless. It’s just noise. It nurtures self-doubt, judgment, and comparison.
I want my kids to be mentally strong—that’s what’s important. Because you can have it all and not have a good mindset, and that all will be lost. It’ll be lost, because you will be easily affected. And if you’re easily affected, that’s a really tough thing, because that’s what people prey on.
** [2] What-is-ness (acceptance)
What-is-ness is accepting everything for what it is. When shit inevitably happens: it is what it is. You are at peace with the nature of this new reality.
There’s stimulus and then there’s response. What people put between the two is their story and opinion about the stimulus, which fucks up the way they respond. It doesn’t matter if you dislike something that happened, or find it inconvenient or uncomfortable. The only thing that’s true is that it happened. Now what are you going to do about it? Get with what is. Ditch your stories and judgments about what is, and just be with it. Work with it. Move with it. Anything less than that is a complete goddamn waste of your time. All you would be doing is indulging negativity and staying stuck.
People create so much friction and agitation in themselves by not accepting the reality of their situation. They want to be in denial about it, or be right about it, or wish it was different. Well, it ain’t. And you’re probably not right. And you’re definitely wasting your motherfucking time.
People can spend days and even years complaining about something that happened to them or why something is the way it is. It hasn’t even occurred to them to drop the ultimately self-harming tools of blame and victimhood. How dare life inconvenience me! Oh Lord, what did I do to deserve this?! Why me?! They’re acting like entitled, stubborn-ass boulders, not water. They’re stuck in a fixed position. Inflexible. Immovable in all the wrong ways. Thinking they deserve something different or better than what they’ve been given.
Sometimes there isn’t anything to do but just sit there and take it. Some of the things that are in life aren’t problems to be solved but realities to allow.
** [3] Consistency (beats intensity)
Especially when it comes to trying to improve your health and wellness, consistency is the goal, more than a single great day or performance. We are in a realm of incremental change, where patience and good habits pay off.
Being consistent in new behaviors creates proof positive that you’re an independent, powerful, creative, strong, functional person. Without consistency, there’s also no improvement and learning. There’s nothing to pivot from and get leverage to the next level. There’s no opportunity to reflect on prior executions. There’s no refinement.
Consistency defends against the frequent funks that come from losing momentum.
** [4] Reliability
To be reliable means having an impeccable relationship with your time and obligations. When you tell someone you’ll do something or you’ll be somewhere, you follow through and back it up with action.
What does it take to be reliable? You have to have a sharp awareness of your schedule and commitments because you have to know what you can and can’t do. In order to deliver on things and show up places, you have to control the amount of things you take on. You have to have the courage and self-respect to be able to say no. A lot of people don’t know how to sit in the uncomfortable position of telling people that simple word. They’re so afraid to disappoint others or never learned to stand up for themselves, and they just say “sure” to every request that gets thrown at them. They don’t know what they want or what they stand for. What they’re left with is a graveyard of broken promises and half-assed results. They’re overwhelmed and can’t fully give themselves to any one thing.
Being on time is the key to success not just in any job but in everything.
You know who else relies on you? Children. If you have kids, reliability is that much more important. Your life is already an important and good enough reason to be mastering your mental. But if you have other little lives and minds depending on your mental game, you’d better develop some reliability. Everything you do is a demonstration of how to live life. Everything leaves an imprint. If you don’t show up for them, they don’t feel like they matter. And that’s the ultimate message any kid is constantly trying to get from their caregivers: “I matter.” How well you deliver that message has more lifelong impact than anyone wants to admit. Your kids can look back and say, “Was Mom/Dad there for me or not? Did they really care?” Your mental game informs their own mental game in life and how they feel about themselves. How you decide to show up in life impacts a whole lot more than just you.
** [5] Determination
We can all get this kind of resolve. So if you don’t have it today, that doesn’t mean that you can’t have it tomorrow. Be determined to get determination.
** [6] Cowboying up (owning up to mistakes and saying sorry)
Transformation starts there—with ownership. You can’t change shit if you don’t own it first.
What people don’t realize is that discomfort is temporary. What happens after that discomfort is the immense sense of power and freedom that comes from having been able to do something about it, to be able to replace things that aren’t working with things that will.
When you take ownership of something, the subtext you’re really delivering is, “Hey, I’m not perfect, and I’ll never pretend to be. But I care about my integrity and my relationships enough to admit when I’m wrong and make it better. I’m not going to lie, and I’m strong enough to handle any repercussions. I acknowledge my sovereign power to decide, and I will never surrender that.”
** [7] Teddy Bearing (being likeable)
So “teddy bearing” just means being likable, personable, and pleasant. I just figured it would get your attention more than any of those other words would.
** [8] Dissatisfaction (motivation to improve your lot)
If you’re not living in a state of growth, then you’re acting like you’re on your way out, and your emotions will follow suit. You might have already noticed that happen when you’re living your life from a place of stagnation. It does not feel good.
If you want to keep growing, expanding, and improving, then you’ll need a little hint of dissatisfaction in the back of your mind. If you’re not just a little dissatisfied, you’ll never push past your familiar limits and do bigger, better things.
It’s not that what you do isn’t good enough. It is. You are. It’s just that you love the feeling of getting even better over time. It’s addicting. It breeds happiness. Living with a little dissatisfaction engages the circuitry in our brains that’s wired to reward us for seeking novelty and moving forward.
Happiness is knowing that you haven’t reached your limit, that you’re capable of more. That’s happiness. If you’re done, that’s not happiness. You can be happy knowing that you haven’t reached your full potential yet, because there’s so much more to give. That is happiness. If you’re done, that’s death.
** [9] Nonreactivity
The world is constantly trying to get a rise out of you and spark a negative reaction.
You lose your cool, which means losing the power that comes from being able to perceive accurately, think clearly, and respond intentionally.
People spew negativity for a reaction. That’s the only reason behind it. They’re looking for a reaction. If you give that, then you feed into it.
Nobody has anything on you unless you give it to them. Your emotions, your response, your anger—those are all things controlled by you. When you’re nonreactive, people are wasting their time when they try to fuck with you.
** [10] Self-Generating Power (motivation)
To truly succeed, you have to be your own power source. Waiting for energy and motivation from the outside is a loser’s strategy.
Work still has to be done regardless of the people you put around you, because anything that you do, you need to be proud of. You gotta be happy with your effort. You gotta know that you put 100 percent into it.
Your future rests on no one else’s shoulders but your own. So learn to carry a bigger load, and you’ll have a bigger life.
** [11] Sponginess (lifetime of learning)
Eagerly soak up knowledge from people around you and those who are better at what you’re trying to do. An insatiable curiosity about the thought processes and execution strategies of other successful people will serve you endlessly.
I wouldn’t know to promote movies outside the fucking country if it weren’t for Will Smith and Tom Cruise. They promoted movies like nobody’s business all over the world. They embraced their fans in every territory. That’s why they became global successes. So when you look at Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson and you look at me, we go fucking everywhere when it comes to promoting a movie. That’s because we’re following the blueprint that was given, and we understand the importance of showing your fans that you love them. You show that by getting your ass on a plane and traveling eighteen hours to go to a red-carpet event, and shake hands and say hello. It goes a long way. I wouldn’t know that if I didn’t soak up that information when it was given.
The smartest person in the room never says they’re the smartest person in the room. The smartest person in the room lets everybody talk, and they listen so they can get even smarter. The smartest person in the room is the spongiest. Facts.
** [12] Relatability
Being able to carry conversations and make connections with a greater range of people opens up doors to ideas and opportunities you wouldn’t otherwise have if you stayed narrow minded.
** [13] Eyes-on-the-prize-ness (goal setting and focus)
You can’t keep your eyes on something you haven’t defined. And that’s one of the biggest problems for most people: they don’t know what they’re after. Or they’re chasing after someone else’s prize without an authentic hunger in their belly for it.
But one of the quickest ways to get closer to learning what you authentically want is through the contrast of experiencing what you don’t want and what doesn’t work. It’s a process of trial and error, but there are no shortcuts. Sometimes you’re possessed by an idea of what your prize could be, and you’ll never know if it’s the one until you start moving toward it, or once you have it in your hands and feel nothing inside.
One of the biggest things that takes people’s eyes off their prize is comparison. Because people often aren’t solid in themselves and don’t have their mental game right, they’re constantly looking around wondering, How do I look? Do they think I’m cool? Do they like where I’m headed? Is it going to get me laid? What are they doing? Shit, maybe that’s what I should be doing too.
The other thing that takes my eyes off the prize is wasting my time staring at the obstacles in my way.
Your ability to succeed and accomplish your goals is directly dependent on your ability to deal with adversity and time.
** [14] Put-up-with-ness (determination)
Legends and champions are willing to put up with more discomfort than other people. They’re willing to make big sacrifices to get what they want.
Flip the frame like this: it’s not even about putting up with discomfort, it’s about refusing to put up with comfort. I refuse to allow mediocrity. I refuse to put up with anything less than my best.
** [15] Humility
Success can be a drug. It can take hold of you and turn you into a junkie, lead you to do things you don’t want to, and turn you into a person you don’t want to be. When it comes to getting wealth or the spotlight, a lot of people want it. But very few can handle it and maintain their sense of self and sanity.
Other people’s opinions of you—positive or negative—don’t mean shit. And what you have doesn’t mean shit either if it’s about putting on a show and not rooted in what makes you feel happy and whole. No matter what you achieve and accomplish, you’re not better than anyone else. You do what you do because you want to do it.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 9, 2023
LOVED this book so much! Short, simple, and to-the-point, but filled with lots of great advice and Kevin Hart humor. I'll definitely read this again, any time I need a pep talk.
March 26, 2023
Positivity will set you free.
Hart’s tools aren’t like that power drill you bought for sporadic DIY projects. They’re intended for daily use, to form a new way of thinking, feeling, and simply being. It’s on this new, sturdy foundation that you can build a better life for yourself and the people around you.
At its core, this foundation is centered on becoming the best version of yourself and inspiring others to do the same. Being reliable will make you someone others can count on. Cowboying up will help you take ownership of your life. Becoming a teddy bear will allow you to bring comfort and safety to the people who matter most.
As you start to reach your goals, dissatisfaction can help you to continue evolving and humility will keep you grounded. On top of all this, positivity will help you approach every challenge you face from the bright side.
The world might be difficult right now, but we all have the power to make it a better place – one small step at a time.
Hart’s tools aren’t like that power drill you bought for sporadic DIY projects. They’re intended for daily use, to form a new way of thinking, feeling, and simply being. It’s on this new, sturdy foundation that you can build a better life for yourself and the people around you.
At its core, this foundation is centered on becoming the best version of yourself and inspiring others to do the same. Being reliable will make you someone others can count on. Cowboying up will help you take ownership of your life. Becoming a teddy bear will allow you to bring comfort and safety to the people who matter most.
As you start to reach your goals, dissatisfaction can help you to continue evolving and humility will keep you grounded. On top of all this, positivity will help you approach every challenge you face from the bright side.
The world might be difficult right now, but we all have the power to make it a better place – one small step at a time.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 11, 2023
80 - 2023
Saya sebenernya gak tau siapa itu Kevin Hart, cuma karena mukanya ada dalam sampul buku ini, baru kayaknya pernah nonton filmnya gitu. Beli ebook ini di Kindle karena waktu itu kalo gak salah cuma 0,99 dolar saja.
Kevin Hart ternyata bisa menulis begini dan temanya adalah self-help atau self-improvement. Dia membeberkan 15 tools yang biasa dia pakai agar dia menjadi orang yang kuat secara mental. Menarik membaca tulisan Kevin ini karena berasal dari pengalaman dan dia bukan lah motivator, tapi yang dia tulis begitu enak. Kayak kita lagi dengerin seorang kawan yang bicara, agar kita menjadi pribadi yang gak sok tau, banyak mengeluh dan menjadi orang yang bermental kuat.
Baca dalam perjalanan udara dari Jakarta ke Pontianak. Sekali duduk bisa selesai baca, tapi terasa penuh.
Saya sebenernya gak tau siapa itu Kevin Hart, cuma karena mukanya ada dalam sampul buku ini, baru kayaknya pernah nonton filmnya gitu. Beli ebook ini di Kindle karena waktu itu kalo gak salah cuma 0,99 dolar saja.
Kevin Hart ternyata bisa menulis begini dan temanya adalah self-help atau self-improvement. Dia membeberkan 15 tools yang biasa dia pakai agar dia menjadi orang yang kuat secara mental. Menarik membaca tulisan Kevin ini karena berasal dari pengalaman dan dia bukan lah motivator, tapi yang dia tulis begitu enak. Kayak kita lagi dengerin seorang kawan yang bicara, agar kita menjadi pribadi yang gak sok tau, banyak mengeluh dan menjadi orang yang bermental kuat.
Baca dalam perjalanan udara dari Jakarta ke Pontianak. Sekali duduk bisa selesai baca, tapi terasa penuh.
February 9, 2023
Not really the kind of pep talk that gets me going.
I mean what he says is pretty true but I didn’t like the delivery. Or maybe it was the descriptions of each trait needed. Or maybe it was how he came off like it was so easy and how well he does if. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just not the right audience.
The pep talk was more for those just getting started. Staring a career. Going from childhood to adult. Having to adult for the first time. A first real job. Or make it big in a field where competition is high. Or simply trying something new.
It just came off kind of arrogant and wasn’t for me.
If you got something out of it, great. You’re on your way. But for me… it was just eh. I get but just eh.
I mean what he says is pretty true but I didn’t like the delivery. Or maybe it was the descriptions of each trait needed. Or maybe it was how he came off like it was so easy and how well he does if. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just not the right audience.
The pep talk was more for those just getting started. Staring a career. Going from childhood to adult. Having to adult for the first time. A first real job. Or make it big in a field where competition is high. Or simply trying something new.
It just came off kind of arrogant and wasn’t for me.
If you got something out of it, great. You’re on your way. But for me… it was just eh. I get but just eh.
December 24, 2022
This book was very quick and enlightening. I liked that Kevin was still able to bring his comedy background out while still inspiring the reader. Theses tips could be considered “common sense” but it still served as a reminder of what to do. I highlighted a lot throughout this book and would go over my highlights in the future.
December 21, 2022
Kevin Hart explains his 15 tools for life such as being positive, teddy bearness, reliability and more. A mixture of stand-up and truth with a casual conversation-like tone, readers will feel like they are in a room while he really gives a pep talk.
January 17, 2023
This is indeed a pep talk. I enjoyed it a lot. This is not a book to read if you want to subscribe to/indulge in victim mentality or if you want to acknowledge that sometimes life's blows actually do knock someone out for the count and then some. So good, a little blind, but a short funny, solid pep talk.
January 24, 2024
Handy Manual
This was an interesting and easy read. (Maybe because I could literally hear Kevin Hart's voice?) I want to have it easily available as a reminder. Really great nuggets.
This was an interesting and easy read. (Maybe because I could literally hear Kevin Hart's voice?) I want to have it easily available as a reminder. Really great nuggets.
October 16, 2024
Great advice
"These are nuggets. If you haven’t already noticed, little nuggets just naturally drop out of my butt—little information nuggets."
Kevin Hart shared some great advice at a more normalized regular human pace. These are things I can adapt into my own life very easily.
"These are nuggets. If you haven’t already noticed, little nuggets just naturally drop out of my butt—little information nuggets."
Kevin Hart shared some great advice at a more normalized regular human pace. These are things I can adapt into my own life very easily.
January 15, 2023
I love Kevin Hart so read this in between other heavier reads. Ok book if you need a pep talk but I wanted more of his story.
February 16, 2023
Great Read!
Kevin Hart’s pep talk was filled with “little nuggets” he learned over the years that everyone can relate to. His humor and honesty made this book inspiring and fun to read.
Kevin Hart’s pep talk was filled with “little nuggets” he learned over the years that everyone can relate to. His humor and honesty made this book inspiring and fun to read.
Read
March 26, 2023Learn valuable tools for personal growth that will help you live your best life.
Okay, here’s the bad news. We’re living in pretty difficult times. The world is more connected and yet more divided than ever before. Hate is prevalent and negativity rife.
So what’s the good news? By changing your perspective and your approach to life, you can rewrite the narrative and move forward with positivity and purpose.
In This Is How We Do It, entertainment icon Kevin Hart offers readers the tools to become the best version of themselves they can be. Combining his signature humor with the knowledge he’s gained from life’s hardest lessons, Hart shares a new way of thinking built around authentic, positive change.
While the book features fifteen core tools, this review will focus on a select few. This way, we’ll be able to delve a bit deeper into the ideas that are most likely to help you create a new, healthy mindset and put it into practice. By the time we’re finished, you’ll be armed with the skills and motivation to really get the ball rolling.
Everyone has the potential to transform their life and the journey starts within. Ready to get started? Let’s go.
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Positivity will set you free.
Let’s start things off with Kevin Hart’s most important tool – one that’s easily accessible, but rarely practiced. It may seem simple at first, but it has the power to change your entire way of life. In fact, if you don’t embrace this tool, then none of the other advice you learn today will matter.
What is this magical cure-all? A positive mindset.
Let’s face it, negativity is everywhere. Especially in the hyper-connected age of social media – all you have to do is scroll down to any comment section to see it.
We’re living in a unique part of human history where “shit-talking” is at an all-time high. Not only is this causing us to constantly doubt ourselves, but it’s actually triggering the fight or flight reflexes in our brains that fear rejection from others.
This negative energy is so toxic that a lot of people simply try to avoid it. And while this may work in the short run, it’s not a sustainable way to live. Negativity is so prevalent in our society that, to completely avoid it, you’d have to settle for a life of doing nothing.
If we sacrifice our dreams and goals because we fear being criticized or judged, we waste our own lives worrying about other people. The solution is not to avoid negativity, but to acknowledge it and decide to thrive anyway.
That’s why Hart’s most fundamental tool is having a positive mindset. Choosing positivity means that you move through life without getting stuck. While other people might bury their head in the sand or walk in circles, you’ll be able to keep moving forward toward your best future free of fear.
Don’t get the wrong idea though – having a positive attitude doesn’t mean you’ll be skipping down the street with a smile on your face every single day. It means seeing the challenges in your life from the bright side; accepting the fact that sometimes life is really hard; and not letting your bad days defeat you.
Hart considers himself a prime example of how a change in mindset can lead to bigger and better things. He was never meant to be where he is today – a renowned actor, author and entrepreneur. In theory, he should never have escaped his rough neighborhood.
Throughout his life, he’s been through the harshest of storms – tossed around and knocked to the ground more times than he can count. What matters is that he chose to get back up and dust himself off, every single time.
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Be reliable with your time and commitments.
Now, be really honest with yourself: can people count on you to show up on time? If the answer is yes, you’re already off to a great start. If it’s a reluctant no – you’ve got some work to do.
Unfortunately, in this chaotic era that we’re living in, reliability and consistency have fallen by the wayside. Being truly reliable requires a good relationship with time and taking responsibility to live up to your obligations. And this involves knowing your limits and how to say no.
You shouldn’t be expected to do everything people ask of you, but it’s also your responsibility to know what you can and can’t accomplish. If you agree to do something, you need to be sure that it’s actually achievable. If you’re stretching yourself too thin, learn to get comfortable with turning people down.
You’re probably cringing at the thought of doing that. In fact, most people are so afraid of disappointing others that they say yes to everything and ultimately lose their sense of self in the process. What they don’t understand is that humans are naturally drawn to people who have their priorities in order, because it means we can trust them.
One thing Hart prides himself on is his ability to be on time. If he’s expected to show up on a movie set, he’ll be there well before his call-time. Why? Because he doesn’t want to waste anyone’s time – and he holds everyone else to the same standard.
Everything we do in this life has an impact and the way we act leaves an impression on the people around us. When you show up for other people, they’ll show up for you. So take a moment to think about the message you’re sending out into the world. Can the people in your life really rely on you?
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Cowboy up to take ownership of your life.
The first two tools were pretty basic self-help concepts that you’ve definitely heard before. This next one is a bit more original.
Hart’s idea of “cowboying up” is about taking ownership of not only your words and actions, but every aspect of your life. To truly know yourself, you have to settle in and face reality.
The problem is that many people refuse to do this. Taking ownership is so uncomfortable for them that they spend their whole lives running away from it. They’re terrified of looking in the mirror and acknowledging that they’re not perfect. At some point in all of our lives, we will inevitably screw up.
But when we fail, the discomfort is only temporary – something we often forget. If we can make it through the rough part, what comes afterward is real, authentic growth. There’s freedom and power in being able to admit you were wrong and fix your mistakes.
Taking ownership also means acknowledging that no argument is ever truly one-sided.
Hart admits that he didn’t always think this way. During arguments in the past, he would automatically default to feeling like the victim. Now, he stops and takes the time to ask himself a few important questions.
“How did I contribute to this?” “How might my actions have created this situation?” “Next time, how can I better communicate my needs or boundaries so that this doesn’t happen again?” When you stop and ask yourself these questions, fights and misunderstandings become opportunities for improvement.
You may or may not know that Hart was caught cheating on his wife. Most public figures would try to keep this out of the press, but Hart doesn’t shy away from talking about it. Instead, he’s chosen to acknowledge it, apologize for his mistakes, and vow to do better.
At the end of the day, you are the only person who can change your life. Take a moment to really let this thought sink in. If you spend your time waiting for someone else to change your life for you, you’ll be waiting forever.
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Be a teddy bear for the people around you.
So we’ve already covered cowboys, now let’s move on to teddy bears. You’re probably wondering what on earth a teddy bear could teach you about living your best life.
Well, think about what teddy bears mean to kids – comfort, affection, and feelings of safety. Teddy bears make us feel good. “Teddy bearing” – as Hart calls it – means being a pleasant, likable human being. Simple as that. And making the people around you feel happy is one of the fastest ways to create a more peaceful, harmonious life for yourself too.
It’s important to note that you shouldn’t be trying to get people to like you. Wanting to be universally liked is playing a losing game. You’re not going to get along with everyone you meet. Not everyone is going to want to spend time with you. Not everyone is going to believe in you and that’s okay. Get comfortable with the idea that if you don’t vibe with someone, it’s not the worst thing in the world.
Wanting to be liked is an external goal. Being likable is internal. It’s an unconditional love for yourself that radiates self-respect and internal power. Being heavily influenced by other people is a weak mindset to have. Instead, replace it with the power to let negativity slide off your back.
So go ahead – be a cute, cuddly teddy bear. Positivity energy is so rare a find these days that it will naturally draw people to you like moths to a flame. And the people who stick around – they’re the ones who are truly meant to be by your side.
---
Dissatisfaction keeps you in a steady state of growth.
It might seem contradictory to everything we’ve just talked about, but Hart’s next piece of advice is to always stay dissatisfied.
If this seems weird to you, that’s normal. Hart admits that this concept is pretty easy to misunderstand. He’s not saying that you should be miserable and unhappy with the way things are in your life. He just means that you should be able to stop and say, “Things are pretty great, but I know I can do better.”
No matter how happy or successful you are, there’s always room for growth. Everything in the world around us is either growing or decaying. That’s the circle of life. It’s up to you to decide which state you want to live in.
For example, Hart was once offered a role in a major movie. It was a project that he would have been incredibly excited about a few years earlier, but it didn’t fit the direction he felt he was going at the time. Hart wanted to be challenged. He wanted to grow.
So, he declined the project and took a risk by accepting a part in a film called The Upside. This was a dramatic role – something he definitely wasn’t used to – but it introduced him to a new group of actors and forced him to rise to the occasion. In the end, the movie was a success. Not only did it give Hart the chance to step outside his comfort zone, it also showed him what he was capable of if he put his mind to it.
A truly healthy mindset is one that desires learning, improvement, and expansion. Stagnation might be more comfortable, but it’s not going to get you where you want to go. Dissatisfaction keeps us on the edge – the only place where we can truly feel alive.
---
Stay humble as you work toward your goals.
So what happens if we utilize these tools, grind our way to the top, and reach success? Does the work stop? Absolutely not.
The last tool we’re going to talk about is humility – something that becomes incredibly important as we begin to reach our goals.
Success has a funny way of grabbing hold of people and turning them into something they’re not. As the spotlight grows brighter, we can lose sight of who we are and what’s really important. Having worked in the entertainment industry for so many years, Hart has seen this happen to a lot of his colleagues. He’s seen them demand absurd things for absolutely no reason and run other people ragged, just because they can.
Hart even admits that he’s occasionally caught himself being swept away by his success. There have been moments when he’s wanted to walk into a room and have everyone stop and say, “Oh my god, that’s Kevin Hart!” The key is that he has chosen to learn from these experiences. To stop and think about what type of person he truly wants to be.
Once again, it’s important to realize that other people’s opinions shouldn’t drive you. If you’re putting on a show to make people admire you, then the things you’ve achieved won’t mean anything. The only way to truly find happiness in this life is to focus on the things that really matter to you.
Humility is the key to staying grounded, even when your circumstances are lifting you onto a pedestal. And it’s not hard to practice it – you just need to remember one fundamental truth: no one is better or worse than anyone else. We’re all just people.
You have your journey and someone else will have theirs. There’s never any need for two journeys to end in conflict. Let’s focus on lifting each other up, not tearing each other down.
---
Hart’s tools aren’t like that power drill you bought for sporadic DIY projects. They’re intended for daily use, to form a new way of thinking, feeling, and simply being. It’s on this new, sturdy foundation that you can build a better life for yourself and the people around you.
At its core, this foundation is centered on becoming the best version of yourself and inspiring others to do the same. Being reliable will make you someone others can count on. Cowboying up will help you take ownership of your life. Becoming a teddy bear will allow you to bring comfort and safety to the people who matter most.
As you start to reach your goals, dissatisfaction can help you to continue evolving and humility will keep you grounded. On top of all this, positivity will help you approach every challenge you face from the bright side.
The world might be difficult right now, but we all have the power to make it a better place – one small step at a time.
Okay, here’s the bad news. We’re living in pretty difficult times. The world is more connected and yet more divided than ever before. Hate is prevalent and negativity rife.
So what’s the good news? By changing your perspective and your approach to life, you can rewrite the narrative and move forward with positivity and purpose.
In This Is How We Do It, entertainment icon Kevin Hart offers readers the tools to become the best version of themselves they can be. Combining his signature humor with the knowledge he’s gained from life’s hardest lessons, Hart shares a new way of thinking built around authentic, positive change.
While the book features fifteen core tools, this review will focus on a select few. This way, we’ll be able to delve a bit deeper into the ideas that are most likely to help you create a new, healthy mindset and put it into practice. By the time we’re finished, you’ll be armed with the skills and motivation to really get the ball rolling.
Everyone has the potential to transform their life and the journey starts within. Ready to get started? Let’s go.
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Positivity will set you free.
Let’s start things off with Kevin Hart’s most important tool – one that’s easily accessible, but rarely practiced. It may seem simple at first, but it has the power to change your entire way of life. In fact, if you don’t embrace this tool, then none of the other advice you learn today will matter.
What is this magical cure-all? A positive mindset.
Let’s face it, negativity is everywhere. Especially in the hyper-connected age of social media – all you have to do is scroll down to any comment section to see it.
We’re living in a unique part of human history where “shit-talking” is at an all-time high. Not only is this causing us to constantly doubt ourselves, but it’s actually triggering the fight or flight reflexes in our brains that fear rejection from others.
This negative energy is so toxic that a lot of people simply try to avoid it. And while this may work in the short run, it’s not a sustainable way to live. Negativity is so prevalent in our society that, to completely avoid it, you’d have to settle for a life of doing nothing.
If we sacrifice our dreams and goals because we fear being criticized or judged, we waste our own lives worrying about other people. The solution is not to avoid negativity, but to acknowledge it and decide to thrive anyway.
That’s why Hart’s most fundamental tool is having a positive mindset. Choosing positivity means that you move through life without getting stuck. While other people might bury their head in the sand or walk in circles, you’ll be able to keep moving forward toward your best future free of fear.
Don’t get the wrong idea though – having a positive attitude doesn’t mean you’ll be skipping down the street with a smile on your face every single day. It means seeing the challenges in your life from the bright side; accepting the fact that sometimes life is really hard; and not letting your bad days defeat you.
Hart considers himself a prime example of how a change in mindset can lead to bigger and better things. He was never meant to be where he is today – a renowned actor, author and entrepreneur. In theory, he should never have escaped his rough neighborhood.
Throughout his life, he’s been through the harshest of storms – tossed around and knocked to the ground more times than he can count. What matters is that he chose to get back up and dust himself off, every single time.
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Be reliable with your time and commitments.
Now, be really honest with yourself: can people count on you to show up on time? If the answer is yes, you’re already off to a great start. If it’s a reluctant no – you’ve got some work to do.
Unfortunately, in this chaotic era that we’re living in, reliability and consistency have fallen by the wayside. Being truly reliable requires a good relationship with time and taking responsibility to live up to your obligations. And this involves knowing your limits and how to say no.
You shouldn’t be expected to do everything people ask of you, but it’s also your responsibility to know what you can and can’t accomplish. If you agree to do something, you need to be sure that it’s actually achievable. If you’re stretching yourself too thin, learn to get comfortable with turning people down.
You’re probably cringing at the thought of doing that. In fact, most people are so afraid of disappointing others that they say yes to everything and ultimately lose their sense of self in the process. What they don’t understand is that humans are naturally drawn to people who have their priorities in order, because it means we can trust them.
One thing Hart prides himself on is his ability to be on time. If he’s expected to show up on a movie set, he’ll be there well before his call-time. Why? Because he doesn’t want to waste anyone’s time – and he holds everyone else to the same standard.
Everything we do in this life has an impact and the way we act leaves an impression on the people around us. When you show up for other people, they’ll show up for you. So take a moment to think about the message you’re sending out into the world. Can the people in your life really rely on you?
---
Cowboy up to take ownership of your life.
The first two tools were pretty basic self-help concepts that you’ve definitely heard before. This next one is a bit more original.
Hart’s idea of “cowboying up” is about taking ownership of not only your words and actions, but every aspect of your life. To truly know yourself, you have to settle in and face reality.
The problem is that many people refuse to do this. Taking ownership is so uncomfortable for them that they spend their whole lives running away from it. They’re terrified of looking in the mirror and acknowledging that they’re not perfect. At some point in all of our lives, we will inevitably screw up.
But when we fail, the discomfort is only temporary – something we often forget. If we can make it through the rough part, what comes afterward is real, authentic growth. There’s freedom and power in being able to admit you were wrong and fix your mistakes.
Taking ownership also means acknowledging that no argument is ever truly one-sided.
Hart admits that he didn’t always think this way. During arguments in the past, he would automatically default to feeling like the victim. Now, he stops and takes the time to ask himself a few important questions.
“How did I contribute to this?” “How might my actions have created this situation?” “Next time, how can I better communicate my needs or boundaries so that this doesn’t happen again?” When you stop and ask yourself these questions, fights and misunderstandings become opportunities for improvement.
You may or may not know that Hart was caught cheating on his wife. Most public figures would try to keep this out of the press, but Hart doesn’t shy away from talking about it. Instead, he’s chosen to acknowledge it, apologize for his mistakes, and vow to do better.
At the end of the day, you are the only person who can change your life. Take a moment to really let this thought sink in. If you spend your time waiting for someone else to change your life for you, you’ll be waiting forever.
---
Be a teddy bear for the people around you.
So we’ve already covered cowboys, now let’s move on to teddy bears. You’re probably wondering what on earth a teddy bear could teach you about living your best life.
Well, think about what teddy bears mean to kids – comfort, affection, and feelings of safety. Teddy bears make us feel good. “Teddy bearing” – as Hart calls it – means being a pleasant, likable human being. Simple as that. And making the people around you feel happy is one of the fastest ways to create a more peaceful, harmonious life for yourself too.
It’s important to note that you shouldn’t be trying to get people to like you. Wanting to be universally liked is playing a losing game. You’re not going to get along with everyone you meet. Not everyone is going to want to spend time with you. Not everyone is going to believe in you and that’s okay. Get comfortable with the idea that if you don’t vibe with someone, it’s not the worst thing in the world.
Wanting to be liked is an external goal. Being likable is internal. It’s an unconditional love for yourself that radiates self-respect and internal power. Being heavily influenced by other people is a weak mindset to have. Instead, replace it with the power to let negativity slide off your back.
So go ahead – be a cute, cuddly teddy bear. Positivity energy is so rare a find these days that it will naturally draw people to you like moths to a flame. And the people who stick around – they’re the ones who are truly meant to be by your side.
---
Dissatisfaction keeps you in a steady state of growth.
It might seem contradictory to everything we’ve just talked about, but Hart’s next piece of advice is to always stay dissatisfied.
If this seems weird to you, that’s normal. Hart admits that this concept is pretty easy to misunderstand. He’s not saying that you should be miserable and unhappy with the way things are in your life. He just means that you should be able to stop and say, “Things are pretty great, but I know I can do better.”
No matter how happy or successful you are, there’s always room for growth. Everything in the world around us is either growing or decaying. That’s the circle of life. It’s up to you to decide which state you want to live in.
For example, Hart was once offered a role in a major movie. It was a project that he would have been incredibly excited about a few years earlier, but it didn’t fit the direction he felt he was going at the time. Hart wanted to be challenged. He wanted to grow.
So, he declined the project and took a risk by accepting a part in a film called The Upside. This was a dramatic role – something he definitely wasn’t used to – but it introduced him to a new group of actors and forced him to rise to the occasion. In the end, the movie was a success. Not only did it give Hart the chance to step outside his comfort zone, it also showed him what he was capable of if he put his mind to it.
A truly healthy mindset is one that desires learning, improvement, and expansion. Stagnation might be more comfortable, but it’s not going to get you where you want to go. Dissatisfaction keeps us on the edge – the only place where we can truly feel alive.
---
Stay humble as you work toward your goals.
So what happens if we utilize these tools, grind our way to the top, and reach success? Does the work stop? Absolutely not.
The last tool we’re going to talk about is humility – something that becomes incredibly important as we begin to reach our goals.
Success has a funny way of grabbing hold of people and turning them into something they’re not. As the spotlight grows brighter, we can lose sight of who we are and what’s really important. Having worked in the entertainment industry for so many years, Hart has seen this happen to a lot of his colleagues. He’s seen them demand absurd things for absolutely no reason and run other people ragged, just because they can.
Hart even admits that he’s occasionally caught himself being swept away by his success. There have been moments when he’s wanted to walk into a room and have everyone stop and say, “Oh my god, that’s Kevin Hart!” The key is that he has chosen to learn from these experiences. To stop and think about what type of person he truly wants to be.
Once again, it’s important to realize that other people’s opinions shouldn’t drive you. If you’re putting on a show to make people admire you, then the things you’ve achieved won’t mean anything. The only way to truly find happiness in this life is to focus on the things that really matter to you.
Humility is the key to staying grounded, even when your circumstances are lifting you onto a pedestal. And it’s not hard to practice it – you just need to remember one fundamental truth: no one is better or worse than anyone else. We’re all just people.
You have your journey and someone else will have theirs. There’s never any need for two journeys to end in conflict. Let’s focus on lifting each other up, not tearing each other down.
---
Hart’s tools aren’t like that power drill you bought for sporadic DIY projects. They’re intended for daily use, to form a new way of thinking, feeling, and simply being. It’s on this new, sturdy foundation that you can build a better life for yourself and the people around you.
At its core, this foundation is centered on becoming the best version of yourself and inspiring others to do the same. Being reliable will make you someone others can count on. Cowboying up will help you take ownership of your life. Becoming a teddy bear will allow you to bring comfort and safety to the people who matter most.
As you start to reach your goals, dissatisfaction can help you to continue evolving and humility will keep you grounded. On top of all this, positivity will help you approach every challenge you face from the bright side.
The world might be difficult right now, but we all have the power to make it a better place – one small step at a time.
January 5, 2023
I didn’t expect this book to be so short but it is exactly as the title suggest, a pep talk which focuses on fifteen tools to achieve your best life. It is a quick self-help book perfect for when you need a pick-me-up or reached a stumbling block on your life.
The titles of some of the chapters are questionable but his advice reads like common sense and things that you already know however, it is affirming to read about it again kind of like a gentle reminder for yourself.
Reading this gave me a sense of optimism and I feel motivated to live my life better and in a more fulfilling manner.
Thank you Netgalley and Amazon Original Stories for the arc.
The titles of some of the chapters are questionable but his advice reads like common sense and things that you already know however, it is affirming to read about it again kind of like a gentle reminder for yourself.
Reading this gave me a sense of optimism and I feel motivated to live my life better and in a more fulfilling manner.
Thank you Netgalley and Amazon Original Stories for the arc.
January 12, 2023
I don't read a lot of self help, mostly because I find many of the books are saying the same thing in slightly different ways. I certainly didn't think Kevin Hart, a comedian and actor who famously was caught being unfaithful to his wife, would have anything useful to say. I read this book out of curiosity and was very pleasantly surprised. It was well written and funny, with his expected sassy (and sometimes profane) wit. The book is a quick read and worth the time. You might just pick up a tip or two to get you moving towards your goals!
December 4, 2022
This was a quick (64 page) read. To me it was a lot of common sense, but I can see how it would be a motivating self-help manual for many. Kevin Hart definitely makes one focus on keep trying and keep your eye on the prize. He also added his humor, which was a bonus.
January 1, 2023
Quick read
This was a fun read. I have listened to Kevin talk a few different platforms - the most intriguing one was a Nike Run Club workout. The man lives by the hustle and is consistently looking to better himself.
This was a fun read. I have listened to Kevin talk a few different platforms - the most intriguing one was a Nike Run Club workout. The man lives by the hustle and is consistently looking to better himself.
October 31, 2022
This is a super quick read yet it is filled with lots of relatable information and yet it’s very informative on how Kevin got to where he is despite where he came from. It’s also full of his classic wit and humor so that it doesn’t come off as being preachy and stiff. Each chapter has a title that gives you an idea of what is going to be covered therein and he talks about how he has used that particular trait in his own personal life and rise to the top and how you can use it in your life as well. It contains 15 “crispy golden chicken nuggets” like “Cowboying Up” and “NonReactivity”
Easy to read, easy to use and it would make a great gift.
Thanks to the publishers and NetGalley for this eArc in exchange for my review.
Easy to read, easy to use and it would make a great gift.
Thanks to the publishers and NetGalley for this eArc in exchange for my review.
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