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258 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 20, 2022


His smile sparks a feeling of certainty inside me. I have never felt this way about anyone. It doesn’t scare me that I’m attracted to him. It scares me that I want everything with him.
Being friends with Logan has been the bright spot in my life for the last couple of months. The idea of not having that makes me feel like I’ve literally got a black hole inside me, swallowing all of the light.
That’s the thing, I can exchange witty messages with the hottest girl in school without blinking but messaging a cute nerd-boy makes me break out in a sweat.
Anyway, I can’t spend my entire evening trying to work out the complexities of my sexuality. I’ve got a calculus test to study for and a geography assignment to complete.
“Hey,” I say.
He turns to look at me, his face splitting into a grin. I focus on where his right lip quirks up slightly more than his left, my heart skittering.
“Hey.”
Just so you know, I’m kind of in love with you.” My voice is no louder than a whisper, but Logan definitely hears me because the grin that lights up his face is the most spectacular thing I’ve ever seen.

❝this looks like the kind of place you’d bring someone if you wanted to murder them,❞ i say because it appears I’m naturally gifted at creating a romantic mood.
❝… maybe with you, people don’t look past the rugby captain thing. and i get why that can be hard because you are so much more than that.❞
❝are you saying i have hidden depths, stenton?❞ i make my tone jokey.
❝oh, i think you have more depth than the kermadec trench,❞ he says.
❝what’s that?❞
❝the deepest ocean trench in the world.❞
❝i’m taking that’s a science-nerd way of giving me a compliment?❞
❝it’s definitely a compliment.❞![]()
he doesn’t even have to touch me or anything, just being with jake, seeing his lopsided grin, talking about the random shit we normally talk about that should mean nothing but somehow means everything.
❝that would be a strong negative.❞
❝are you just leaving that open for a chemistry pun?❞ i ask.
logan’s forehead scrunches. ❝what?❞
❝the word negative,❞ i explain.
he shakes his head. ❝oh god, nothing is safe with you.❞
i grin back. ❝you should always remember that.❞these chemistry puns are slaying me 🥲🫶
it’s not that weird to admire another guy’s body, right? it’s like admiring a beautiful mountain or lovely sunset. just appreciating that Mother Nature occasionally has a particularly inspired moment.![]()