The Special Stuff

by D.E. McCluskey

YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT!

Welcome to Ozzies Kebab Shop!

Kebab Shops… the last bastion of a great night out. Everyone knows that if you don’t get lucky, then the humble doner kebab is the next best thing. Loads of salad, loads of onions, tahini sauce, extra hot chilli, all wrapped up in a toasted pitta bread.

However, be careful. Be nice to the people serving you, otherwise you might be getting… THE SPECIAL STUFF!

114 pages, Kindle Edition

Published October 5, 2022

About the author

I love horror, and I love Christmas. Some would say that the two are not mutually associated, I would tell you different.

I started writing at Christmas, back in the days of yore. I was reading The Night Before Christmas, by Clement Clarke Moore to my daughter who was too excited to sleep. But, I used my secret weapon, my boring voice she was soon catching the right amount of zzzzz's... As I tiptoed out of the room, giving Santa the space he needed to do his bit, I thought to myself, you know what? I could write something like that...

So I did...

The good Behaviour Act was written, the first story in Interesting Tymes, my very first publication.

I live in sunny Liverpool in the UK with my partner and daughters, I used to work in IT but don't anymore, and am the happier person for it. I love football, music and film... I also enjoy long walks, pretty flowers, and gratuitous violence and nudity...

I can be found mostly on Facebook @demccluskey_author
or on Twitter @dammagedpro @demccluskey1

my website is www.dammaged.com

Reviews

[Peter Topside · Rating 4 out of 5]

DNF at 45%. Everyone hear me out. I thought this was really gross and funny, but I just ate a big pork ridden lunch and I couldn’t see it through. Splatterpunk at its finest. The effects of this gnarly kebab on Mick and Finn were so nauseating that I won’t be able to think about jelly, jam, marmalades, preserves, snot, meat, or fat for awhile. The entire premise is so ridiculous that you can’t hell but laugh at it and the content is nonstop cringe. But that was the end game. And I loved this enough to let it go before I vomited on my new throw pillows. This is literally everything that you hoped it wouldn’t be. Please read this only if you have a strong stomach and didn’t just ingest Wilbur from Charlotte’s Web.

[Vicki Herbert - Vacation until Jan 2 · Rating 4 out of 5]

For Your Dining Pleasure We'll be Serving
The Special Stuff...

THE SPECIAL STUFF
(Dinner and Show Series Book 1)
by D.E. McCluskey

No spoilers. 4 stars. Best friends, Finn and Mick, made a late night of it getting drunk at the Rose and Crown pub...

The drink, making them feel especially angry and rowdy, spurred them on to pick a fight with an old couple...

Better to fight with the old couple than the burly barman who refused to serve them more liquor...

And later ejected them from the pub...

Back out on the streets, the friends decided that they were hungry...

Up ahead...

Out of the drizzling darkness, a small oasis of light beamed out of the cold, murky night...

A yellow sign advertised it as a kebab shop called Ozzie's, fine Turkish cuisine of mixed meat (ew!)...

The two men left the cold night and entered the shop with its warm, welcoming, greasy atmosphere...

The aroma made their stomachs grumble...

Still angry about their episode at the pub, they were belligerent with the small Turkish man at the counter...

Then they demanded two doner Kebobs with chips. They said: Don't give us any of your horrible sh*te, just the good stuff...

Chop chop!!...

Both men knew they'd never eat this slop if they weren't p*ssed, joking that the mystery meat was probably c*cks and arseholes...

Then they drunkenly laughed and called out to the counter man: Change that order to two arsehole kebobs, you filthy ***** jockey...

The man smirked and replied: What I'm serving you tonight is the special stuff, only reserved for special customers...

Well, now I know where ebola, the virus that jumps from host to host, originated from: donor kebob shops, lol.

This story was an onslaught of imagery created to make the reader sick to his/her stomach. I'm fairly new to extreme horror, so this little story got to me. Although the story was good, I would strongly advise not eating while reading this one.

I can't wait to move on to book 2 in this series, THE STINKY STUMP, after warming up with this one!

Warning to some readers: This is extreme horror. Although there isn't much violence, the yuck factor is high! Also, there are some racial slurs.

[Diane · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a little gem of a book...it was disgusting,vile,stomach churning and.....funny!(yes! Funny)
OK..You stumble out of your local with 10 pints of cheap lager swilling around in an empty stomach and you do no more than head for the nearest Doner Kebab Shop.
But...what ever you do in your drunken state...don't go calling the little Greek guy behind the counter something in the words of a"FAT LITTLE DIRTY SMELLY GREASY CUNT" coz he won't take lightly to your foul outburst of rudeness and offensive language and might/will give you the "SPECIAL STUFF" inside of your pitta bread covered in hot chilli sauce and you could/will become either a....SDK499 or a LDK649...Curious????? read it and vomit 😳😳🤢🤢🤮🤮😷😷🤒🤒A brilliant book with a vile storyline.... 5 Sickening 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟's

[Anja Henriksen · Rating 5 out of 5]

McCluskey's special Stuff is like a Disney movie; there's a story on several levels of complexity, served with a very un-disney-ish grossness and vulgarity it's hard not to hate the loving way.

This is a story which needs to be served hot in one sitting without too much information, but rather to be enjoyed with open mouth...I mean mind. Only thing there is to know before biting in is, it's gross, it's funny, it's absurd, and it will leave you with the weirdest taste of pleasurable disgust.

On one level, this could be a story of how most of us think we are experiencing the day after drinking and some junk food on the way home, next day hung over spiced up with a bit of food poisoning from the kebab hanging too many hours.

On a different level it's a story about how karma works in mysterious ways making the circle of life of shit heads sustain itself for everyone's benefit.

Lastly I will give a shout out of respect to all the British women who, might or might not be as calm and grounded as those two wives we follow in this story. No fucks was ever given for modern hysteria for sure lol.

Just read it... indulge it...enjoy it

[The_5ft_reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

A golden rule to live by .... never be rude to people who serve you food! 😂
This book.... I thought this author could not push the boundaries anymore after "zola" and "cravings" but here we are! It's really gross with VERY vivid descriptions not much left to the imagination here, but as always McCluskey does it well and with some twisted humour chucked in!

[Emle H · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so gross I had to apologize to my mechanic when my Bluetooth accidentally connected to my pickup truck while getting service done. I’m sure they think I’m some sort of deranged weirdo now and I might have to find a new service shop 😅. (Not really, my guys are awesome). If you want a traumatizing shittastic (pun fully intended) experience, this is the book to read. DE McCluskey never disappoints when it comes to splatterpunk.
Tw: vomit and dookie 💩

[Christopher · Rating 4 out of 5]

This story kept me enthralled and worried throughout, at whatever disgustingly outrageous scene would follow.
If you are simply looking to be grossed out by a story, I can guarantee you that this one will satisfy.
I have never read something so outrageous!

[Daniel Lorn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Looking for inspiration for your new year's resolution to cut back on takeaway food?
Look no further!
McCluskey has taken the standard (for many) Kebab shop visit after a drunken night out and amplified it into a truly disgusting and brutal tale of extreme horror.
After avoiding kebabs for many years, I can safely say that I am in no rush to ever have one again after reading this!
Very nicely done and I already have a few more of this author's books on my TBR list.
Highly recommended, especially to those who have ever suffered the aftermath of a dodgy takeaway.

[Victoria · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was given this book as a gift to read from the author, he’s amazing by the way. My review isn’t bias though, I promise. I first started reading Cravings, and then Zola, and I was wondering if anything could trump that. I have to say The Special Stuff did, I was ready to puke reading this. There’s nothing like feeling those emotions while reading a book.

[Lisa Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

D E McCluskey returns to hardcore extreme horror with his new novella The Special Stuff.

As the synopsis says, be nice to the people serving you, and this is a story about what can happen if you don’t.

McCluskey channels his inner Matt Shaw with this one, pulling out ALL the stops and adding vile and twisted humor into the mix of vile and brutal comeuppance. While the story itself is great and well thought-out (it’s a solid story), it is also a whole other level of graphic grotesqueness and suffering. But in a good way if you are a fan of Extreme Horror.

Extreme Horror fans rejoice, you’re going to love this gut-twisting, exclaim-out-loud novella.

[Corrina Morse · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ok, umm, where the hell do I start with this one?? 😉 If you've read Cravings and/or Zola, McCluskey's other titles in his extreme series, then you'll have some idea of what to expect. But don't ever get complacent with this author, as you think you know what's coming, but he always mixes it up. When this book started, for example, I thought, "Oh, this isn't too bad, he's tamed it down a bit…." He hasn't! He hasn't tamed it at all! If anything, he's made it so much more wild! And gross! You will definately be wanting a barf bag with this one….a bloody big one!! (I think the book should come with one if I'm honest! 🤢😂)

It starts off innocently enough, with Mick and Finn down the pub one night, having a few bevvies before going home to their wives! After one too many, and a bit of a fracas with an elderly couple, the obvious next stop for them is the kebab shop! And what do you do when you're in the kebab shop, pissed? You give the kebab man grief! In this case, giving the kebab man grief gets you a Special Kebab….and there's no extra charge, or is there??

There is a lot of messy moistness and mucus in this story! Lots of rank rashes, disgusting discharge, sickening smells and general grossness! There are scenes reminiscent of The Incredible Melting Man, there is some very dark, twisted humour. And that age old, what would it feel like to be dead, but not dead conundrum! I even felt sorry for Mick and Finn, what they were going through and the situation they found themselves in! I mean, they were cocky assholes, but they didn't deserve that!!

And that ending!!!!! 😲This story definitely goes full circle, and will probably have you puking your guts up, quite literally!! 🤢 Overall, a fantastically fucked up, vomit inducing, tale, that will leave you wanting more….maybe… 😉

[Nat Whiston · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh good God, where do I start. So I've read the lighter side of Dave's work. In the form of A Seagull's Tale, which was charming, funny and just a sweet kids' book.
This is my first introduction to Dave's other work and I can safely say. I will not be eating my favourite kebabs for a while, and it will make you think twice about how we act when pissed. This was BRUTAL, like, Dave did not skimp out on description and detail of what Finn and Mick endure. To an extent, I think Mick had it coming as he was a bit of an asshole. However, even with my worst enemy, I wouldn't wish for this punishment. Dave went all out gross-a-thon with this book, for over 100 pages we go from severe food poisioning. To all-out degradation, that turns even the strongest stomach. I mean both men suffer an incredibly painful and genuinely frightening transformation that puts even the American Werewolf in London change scene to shame. Then there's the aftermath of what the two men experience, now that in itself was incredibly horrible to read. As these poor women are subjected to the smell, the vision and the feel of their new husbands. But also he projects so many great emotions through what the essentially witness. The ending was well, now that was something I kind of expected however he added so much more to make it gruesome and full-on vengeful. Be careful what you eat after being an asshole to the people who serve you, is the clear moral of the story. Unless of course you want the special stuff.

[Stu Corner · Rating 4 out of 5]

Relatable.

[Christina Pfeiffer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I want to start this off with this statement: this is the MOST disgusting, unsettlingly nauseating book I have read this year and people, I am coming up on 300 books read. So I’m not saying this lightly.

DE McCluskey’s new one THE SPECIAL STUFF is … it’s horrific. Vile. And quite honestly should not be read by anyone who is sane.

Cue this disgusting bitch reading it and LOVING IT. OK, maybe not love, but certainly enjoying the holy shit out of it and there is plenty of that.

Finn and Mick are out having some pints and they become terrible people. But karma is just one kebab shop away. Will they live to drink again? Do they learn their lesson?

There are so many bodily fluids and just… Christ in a side cart. If you have read ZOLA and/or CRAVINGS, this one doesn’t compare. This is MORE fucked up. And I really thought he had peaked with ZOLA.

I was so wrong.

There is a funny Easter egg in it that I caught but even that doesn’t make it any better.

McCluskey outdid himself with THE SPECIAL STUFF. I don’t know if I am going to trust him sending me PDF DMs anymore. Ha.

October 2nd. Evil Cookie Publishing. This is one you do not miss but make sure to have a bucket close.

[Raven T. Nudd · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one gross story. And I don't mean the usual gross but pure vomit inducing gross. I loved every second of it!!!
I could smell the smells, hear the pains, taste the tastes....it was so thoroughly written that all your senses come alive while reading this one. :)

[Melanie Bouthillette · Rating 5 out of 5]

I cannot say more good things about this author @demccluskey_author . He can write a discussing story that will leave you feeling greasy and gross. After being quite disappointed with the last book I read "The Town" by Bentley Little this was exactly what I needed to bring my reading spirits back up.

This story doesn't disappoint if you've ever had a night out that left you feeling like crap for days. It's disgusting in all the right ways and will leave you feeling like you need a three day shower.

So good !!! 5 stars from me and definitely an extreme horror author to watch out for.

[AJRXII · Rating 5 out of 5]

More brilliance from Dave. I know all racists need a dig or two but this is a bit extreme 🤣🤣🤣

[Bryan Moyer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought I was armored against filth after the trauma that was Zola, but I was so wrong. This book looked at the words depraved, disgusting, heinous, and vile and said hold my beer. The writing is fantastic, which is the problem. McCluskey writes this filth so well that you can't help but keep reading to see what happens to the victims of his mind he calls characters like rubberneckers hoping to see the mangled victims of a car wreck. I've now been turned off of another food for a while thanks to the sickness that was allowed to seep from the dark crevasses of this man's twisted mind.

[Janine Van · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jesus, this books disgusting.

I really enjoyed this. It was so gross, so disgusting. I knew where it was headed but the descriptions were flavourful and kept me reading. It is a simple plot, but visceral. I want to see this in a film with the most hands on gross special effects possible.
Some parts were so gross I was giggling like a mad woman.

[Jennifer Matchett · Rating 4 out of 5]

He’s done it again. He’s made a story that made my stomach turn. I felt physically ill for most of this book, which I read in 2 sittings. It was probably better that way. I think that’s why I like the nasty books…bc even if it makes you gag, it’s getting a response out of you. But ugh this one was rough. A nice little revenge take if you don’t mind feeling queasy while you read it.

[Kimberly Spookybookwurm · Rating 4 out of 5]

I chose this story to be my birthday read, and I was absolutely disgusted from the beginning all the way to the very end. I found Mick and Finn's behavior just as unsavory as their outcomes, I was excited to see what would end up happening to them. After finishing, I was satisfied with the ending. I kept feeling bad for everyone who had to encounter them, especially for Mary and Paula. God, especially Paula.
The entire thing kept me in a shocked feeling. The noises and the smells imagined made me sick to my stomach all the way through. There are so many scenes and bodily secretions that are just burnt into my head now. I was both horrified and impressed. This had me not wanting to take any breaks so I could figure out what would happen to them, but I had to take a couple of breaks for my stomach's sake.

[Ali O · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Special Stuff by D.E. McCluskey
Narrated by ASA James Henry
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟(4.5 rounded up)

Damn!! This is quite a story!! I don’t hear very much about this book, but man is it a whopper of a story!!
It’s extremely disgusting and the imagery made me feel like I was watching it all on a big screen!
But, on top of the grossness, this is a very entertaining and mildly humorous story. It’s very intense and exciting and definitely makes me want to look at my food carefully!

I listened to the audio and the narrator did a good job. I got to sit back and just listen to the intensity of the book!

If D.E. McCluskey writes it, it goes on my list to read it!!
*Check this out with an empty stomach and if you enjoy extreme gore/horror!* 🤢💩🤮

[Kelly Rickard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mike and Finnley are those stereotypical ignorant drunkard louts who will start a fight with anyone for the most stupid reason. It is never their fault that they knocked a drink over an older lady and her coat and her husband commented about it but in their twisted disgusting world it means the elderly man deserves a beating. They are also the kind of low lifes who are racially abusive to the Greek takeaway owner. Ozzie serves them 'The Special Stuff' and a nasty sort of very harse justice is served with horrific retching detail.

I had to put this down a few times because I was retching too much. So if you like extreme gory gross out horror read this book.

[Aisla Houghton-Foster · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’ll be honest - I didn’t really enjoy this book and while I understand the concepts behind it, I found it a bit lacking beyond simply being stomach-churning for the sake of it. There were some interesting ideas in the last third of the book as well, such as the doctors’ responses and/or possibly complicity, but they just didn’t get explored.

I think it’s probably to the horror-novella genre what Tusk is to the horror-movie genre - you’ll hate it or love it, but either way you probably won’t enjoy it!

[Stephen Cooper · Rating 4 out of 5]

Honestly, having witnessed behaviour like this at Ken's kebabs repeatedly at 3 in the morning in my youth by the chav's coming out of whatever fucking club was popular at the time (not the metal alternative club I was emerging from), I kinda think these guys deserved what happens in the book.

lol. Kinda kidding... Book was super gross and enjoyable. Glad I don't eat kebabs as this would put me right off them.

[Christa · Rating 4 out of 5]

🤢 i won this from DE McCluskey
My god this book was vile. Disgusting.
Stomach turning with a side of laughs.
DE McCluskey had done it again with sucha vivid disgusting picture that gets painted in your mind as you read this book.
Weak stomachs may need a barf bag.

Anyone want a donna kabob? 😂

[Carly: o)Odell · Rating 2 out of 5]

The story had so much potential but I feel 80% of the book was just so repetitive and a bit boring tbh. I wish there was a little more backstory on the MC’s and a lot less repetition about them sh^tting themselves every other chapter 😂😂😂 It would’ve also been cool to get a bit of a longer ending! I still love D.E. McCluskey, but this was a miss for me!

[Nick Scarbrough · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a ride!

I have read several of McCluskey's books and always love them. This one started out a little weird and boring and I almost did not finish it. HOWEVER....... I continued on and I'm very glad I did. Can't wait to read the stinky stump tomorrow!

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, I’ll have a hard time looking at certain foods without thinking of this book. Loved the revenge plot. Laughed at a few parts. Loved the first half of the book, the second half kinda slowed down for me. Overall, for extreme horror, it was a fantastic read.

[lolly Storm sparrow · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was filthy, it is days like this I regret the gift of eyeballs.
I read this a while ago, before discovering Goodreads. So I refreshed my memory, and decided I'd yeet up a review. Lucky I didn't yeet my dinner over the floor. 😳
Disgustaaang!!!
Ps be nice to those that serve you food.