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Mediocre Monk: A Stumbling Search for Answers in a Forest Monastery
Funny, perceptive, and deeply personal, Mediocre Monk follows Grant Lindsley’s rocky journey toward spiritual growth—one that ultimately leads him to places he never expected.
After the sudden death of a friend, Grant Lindsley abandons his corporate job to train as a monk in one of the strictest Buddhist traditions on earth. Lost and bereft, he believes he can find answers in the mountains of Thailand. He shaves his head and eyebrows, eats one bowl of food a day, and lives in a cave, his solitude punctuated by brushes with snakes, scorpions, and drug smugglers.
But Lindsley can’t transform himself into the profound guru he envisions—he’s hungry, restless, and lacking in the humility that monkhood requires. Eventually, he exhausts himself into moments of genuine growth, but in the opposite way from what he expects. Rather than transcending grief and becoming entirely self-reliant, he is surprised to find solace in allowing pain and reopening himself to community.
For anyone who has nurtured a fantasy of dropping out in search of answers, Mediocre Monk suggests a reality that is far more complicated—and rewarding.
After the sudden death of a friend, Grant Lindsley abandons his corporate job to train as a monk in one of the strictest Buddhist traditions on earth. Lost and bereft, he believes he can find answers in the mountains of Thailand. He shaves his head and eyebrows, eats one bowl of food a day, and lives in a cave, his solitude punctuated by brushes with snakes, scorpions, and drug smugglers.
But Lindsley can’t transform himself into the profound guru he envisions—he’s hungry, restless, and lacking in the humility that monkhood requires. Eventually, he exhausts himself into moments of genuine growth, but in the opposite way from what he expects. Rather than transcending grief and becoming entirely self-reliant, he is surprised to find solace in allowing pain and reopening himself to community.
For anyone who has nurtured a fantasy of dropping out in search of answers, Mediocre Monk suggests a reality that is far more complicated—and rewarding.
240 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 11, 2023
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
April 11, 2023
Grant Lindsley is deeply struggling with his friends’ death in a fatal car accident. Three out of the five people in the car perished, the grief from which caused Grant to leave his corporate job, family, and new girlfriend and buy a one-way ticket to Thailand to train in one of the strictest traditions in Theravada Buddhism—the “Thai Forest Tradition that seeks to follow the exact rules of the historical Buddha from over 2,500 years ago.” (location 3345 of 3370) His first Buddhism encounter was an intensive eight-week session in New Zealand “…as an undergraduate at Carleton College, where he majored in psychology and minored in neuroscience...” (location 3345 of 3370) In the Thai Forest Tradition, he eats only one meal per day, shaves off his head hair and eyebrows, and eventually get permission from the Ajahn to live in a cave in the forest. Unfortunately, there are poisonous snakes, scorpions, wild animals, and Laotian drug smugglers who visit the cave as well. He finds he is unable to force himself to become the true guru he believes he can be—he is restless, bored, hungry, and definitely has too much pride to be a humble monk. He tires himself out eventually, and it is then that he finds he begins his real growth, albeit not the way he expects it. He doesn’t become self-reliant by forcing himself to be alone nor does he heal from grief by trying to force himself; instead he finds comfort in allowing pain, accepting gratitude, and associating with others.
“Mediocre Monk” is a very personal and moving memoir about learning and seeking to embrace all in your life with acceptance and gratitude, even that which may be dangerous or painful. In the beginning, it is clear he is trying to oblige himself to achieve what he was looking for by living in the monastery, like forcing the proverbial square peg into a round hole. He purposefully chose the Thai Forest Monks for this purpose: “I was diving into the most intense monastic tradition I could find on planet Earth—because extremes also held me accountable. I needed from the outside what I couldn’t muster from within: discipline, insight, and self-reliance, all of which I thought I had gained the first time I went to a monastery. But they’d worn off. I had come to Thailand to get them back, to shove myself once and for all into enlightenment.” (location 63-76 of 3370) However, while not as he expected, he most definitely came away a different person, one ready to love and commit to his wife MJ (with the blessing of a Buddhist nun) and his family, growing into the man he always had the potential to become. We can all see ourselves in him as he lists his embarrassments and failures in detail as well as his subsequent successes. I truly believe that after his monastic experience and months of Buddhist teaching he grew to become his best self; he is no longer looking for adulation, praise, or forcing compliance, but living his experience. In his acceptance, he has learned what it means to be truly human.
I’d like to thank NetGalley, Grant Lindsley, and Girl Friday Books for the opportunity to read and review this ARC.
“Mediocre Monk” is a very personal and moving memoir about learning and seeking to embrace all in your life with acceptance and gratitude, even that which may be dangerous or painful. In the beginning, it is clear he is trying to oblige himself to achieve what he was looking for by living in the monastery, like forcing the proverbial square peg into a round hole. He purposefully chose the Thai Forest Monks for this purpose: “I was diving into the most intense monastic tradition I could find on planet Earth—because extremes also held me accountable. I needed from the outside what I couldn’t muster from within: discipline, insight, and self-reliance, all of which I thought I had gained the first time I went to a monastery. But they’d worn off. I had come to Thailand to get them back, to shove myself once and for all into enlightenment.” (location 63-76 of 3370) However, while not as he expected, he most definitely came away a different person, one ready to love and commit to his wife MJ (with the blessing of a Buddhist nun) and his family, growing into the man he always had the potential to become. We can all see ourselves in him as he lists his embarrassments and failures in detail as well as his subsequent successes. I truly believe that after his monastic experience and months of Buddhist teaching he grew to become his best self; he is no longer looking for adulation, praise, or forcing compliance, but living his experience. In his acceptance, he has learned what it means to be truly human.
I’d like to thank NetGalley, Grant Lindsley, and Girl Friday Books for the opportunity to read and review this ARC.
February 10, 2023
Mediocre Monk A Stumbling Search for Answers in a Forest Monastery by Grant Lindsley. ©2023. Advanced Reading Copy. Uncorrected Proof courtesy of NetGalley. Published by Girl Friday Books, Seattle. 5 Stars. Publication date is set for April 11, 2023.
An excellent read. Told with clarity and insight, the account of Lindsley’s pilgrimage is textured, reverent and humorous, showing that grief’s impetus is not a one-way trip but a circuitous journey and an invocation to everything that is hidden.
The writing has a natural, down-to-earth quality and, as the story gently progresses, you find yourself experiencing the subtle dance that takes place between the reader and the author's narrative. Highly recommend.
An excellent read. Told with clarity and insight, the account of Lindsley’s pilgrimage is textured, reverent and humorous, showing that grief’s impetus is not a one-way trip but a circuitous journey and an invocation to everything that is hidden.
The writing has a natural, down-to-earth quality and, as the story gently progresses, you find yourself experiencing the subtle dance that takes place between the reader and the author's narrative. Highly recommend.
April 22, 2023
This book provided a very unique perspective into the experience of living in a Thai forest monastery.
I really liked Lindsley's writing style. His contradictory, and at times reactive responses to experiences, felt relatable and candid. I appreciated that his writing acknowledged a tendency towards idealism, an honest exploration of his own wrestle of when to buoy ideals vs when to allow an ideal to soften (or be completely put down).
This also felt like a coming of age book, one that plays with themes of stepping into adulthood and feeling the freedom, and also the weight, that comes with this transition.
Honestly, I couldn't put the book down. It was very enjoyable to read. I look forward to reading more of Lindsley's work.
I really liked Lindsley's writing style. His contradictory, and at times reactive responses to experiences, felt relatable and candid. I appreciated that his writing acknowledged a tendency towards idealism, an honest exploration of his own wrestle of when to buoy ideals vs when to allow an ideal to soften (or be completely put down).
This also felt like a coming of age book, one that plays with themes of stepping into adulthood and feeling the freedom, and also the weight, that comes with this transition.
Honestly, I couldn't put the book down. It was very enjoyable to read. I look forward to reading more of Lindsley's work.
June 3, 2023
This has more language and sexual things than I liked but I really was interested in Grants story. I loved going through his experiences and felt connection in a lot of points. He’s a great author and a humble man.
June 11, 2024
The first 100 pages are so dull that I had to set it down twice and read another book. But I’m glad I kept coming back because the second 100+ pages I read in one go! 2 stars to the first half and 4 stars for the second half. Honestly just start at page 100 and you’ll have a better experience and won’t miss much.
April 11, 2023
I loved this book! I couldn't put it down. I definitely recommend for anyone, regardless of where you are in your own spiritual journey.
Want to read
April 20, 2023Thank you Goodreads and Girl Friday Productions for gifting me a copy in exchange for my honest review. This sounds like it's right up my alley and I can't wait to get into it.
Review to come.
Review to come.
January 17, 2024
This is just ok! I found the author cocky and very full of himself! This book in my opinion should never seen the light of day. Sorry not sorry!
March 26, 2023
Mediocre Monk follows the author through six months when he drops out of society to follow the teachings of the Thai Forest Monks (a strict sect of Theravada Buddhism) in search of enlightenment. Part memoir, part spirituality philosophy, and a little bit of travelog, from the first page this book is unflinchingly honest and at the same time, humorous.
It’s evident from the get-go that the author has quite an ego (although possibly not too much larger than most twenty-five year old males) and that rather than running toward enlightenment, he was running away from grief. The first story he tells is of meeting a female traveler when he lands in Thailand and being torn between wanting to be humble about the journey he’s setting out on but also wanting to be acknowledged and applauded for it. This dichotomy plays out often through his first few months at the monastery: wanting to be seen as somehow special and more spiritual than the average seeker, yet still feeling like he’s falling short of the ideal he’s set for himself.
One of the more revealing parts that I loved was how he became annoyed with just about every other traveler when he first arrived at the monastery, in particular with one man who glommed onto him. The author related his disgust with the young man’s brashness, yet it was pretty obvious the author probably acted and thought the exact same way. This honesty and freshness made his eventual spiritual awakening that much more poignant.
It’s not all hours of meditation, or attempts at meditation, though. There’s plenty of insight into the monk’s daily lives, monk rock stars, hidden caves, buddhist instruction and thought, drug smugglers, and trips to the outside world. I was pretty impressed that the author remembered everything in so much detail, considering most of what I think went into his diary was pithy spiritual sayings.
Even though I really, really enjoyed reading this, in the end I wanted a little bit more. The journey took place around 2015 and I would have liked an epilogue or final chapter on where his life took him; how he applied what he’d learned into his daily life. There are hints of it, but I’d have loved to have seen how those six months and the lessons that he learned influenced the next several years without having to Google him. (I did Google him; most links are connected to him still being active in Ultimate Frisbee). Without that, it made the book feel like it was more of a good story than something that had a lasting impact on him.
Regardless, it was still a great read and I chuckled a lot. And hey, laughter is always good.
Thank you to NetGalley and Girl Friday Productions for providing the ARC ebook. I’ve left my review honestly and voluntarily.
It’s evident from the get-go that the author has quite an ego (although possibly not too much larger than most twenty-five year old males) and that rather than running toward enlightenment, he was running away from grief. The first story he tells is of meeting a female traveler when he lands in Thailand and being torn between wanting to be humble about the journey he’s setting out on but also wanting to be acknowledged and applauded for it. This dichotomy plays out often through his first few months at the monastery: wanting to be seen as somehow special and more spiritual than the average seeker, yet still feeling like he’s falling short of the ideal he’s set for himself.
One of the more revealing parts that I loved was how he became annoyed with just about every other traveler when he first arrived at the monastery, in particular with one man who glommed onto him. The author related his disgust with the young man’s brashness, yet it was pretty obvious the author probably acted and thought the exact same way. This honesty and freshness made his eventual spiritual awakening that much more poignant.
It’s not all hours of meditation, or attempts at meditation, though. There’s plenty of insight into the monk’s daily lives, monk rock stars, hidden caves, buddhist instruction and thought, drug smugglers, and trips to the outside world. I was pretty impressed that the author remembered everything in so much detail, considering most of what I think went into his diary was pithy spiritual sayings.
Even though I really, really enjoyed reading this, in the end I wanted a little bit more. The journey took place around 2015 and I would have liked an epilogue or final chapter on where his life took him; how he applied what he’d learned into his daily life. There are hints of it, but I’d have loved to have seen how those six months and the lessons that he learned influenced the next several years without having to Google him. (I did Google him; most links are connected to him still being active in Ultimate Frisbee). Without that, it made the book feel like it was more of a good story than something that had a lasting impact on him.
Regardless, it was still a great read and I chuckled a lot. And hey, laughter is always good.
Thank you to NetGalley and Girl Friday Productions for providing the ARC ebook. I’ve left my review honestly and voluntarily.
October 25, 2023
Grant Lindsey's "Mediocre Monk" served as my eye-opening journey into the world of Buddhist monastery life. The sheer discipline required, the profound contemplation preceding ordination, the myriad challenges one encounters, the relentless allure of temptation, and the fierce battle to conquer it are all vividly portrayed in this book.
What truly sets this work apart is its remarkable relatability. The author's candid admissions of moments of self-entitlement, like expecting a cab driver to be impressed by his pilgrimage to Wah Pah Nanachat or anticipating the Ajahn's admiration for his questions, injected a delightful dose of humor into the narrative. I couldn't help but chuckle during these inner monologues.
"Mediocre Monk" is undeniably inspirational, though its impact depends on one's perspective. While I may not be booking a one-way ticket to Thailand to join a monastery and subsist on a single daily meal, it has motivated me to test my own boundaries. It has kindled a desire to be more stringent in my dietary choices and has ignited a newfound enthusiasm for meditation. I'm genuinely pleased that I decided to pick up this book.
What truly sets this work apart is its remarkable relatability. The author's candid admissions of moments of self-entitlement, like expecting a cab driver to be impressed by his pilgrimage to Wah Pah Nanachat or anticipating the Ajahn's admiration for his questions, injected a delightful dose of humor into the narrative. I couldn't help but chuckle during these inner monologues.
"Mediocre Monk" is undeniably inspirational, though its impact depends on one's perspective. While I may not be booking a one-way ticket to Thailand to join a monastery and subsist on a single daily meal, it has motivated me to test my own boundaries. It has kindled a desire to be more stringent in my dietary choices and has ignited a newfound enthusiasm for meditation. I'm genuinely pleased that I decided to pick up this book.
March 12, 2023
After a friend's tragic death, Grant Lindsley reacts by quitting his job and buying a one way ticket to Thailand, where he plans to enter a monastery, sit in silence, learn the secrets of enlightenment, and then write a best selling book sharing the aforementioned secrets. If this seems impractical and a tad presumptuous... it is. And Author Grant recognizes it as such, even if Monk-in-Training Grant did not.
Spoiler alert... By the end of Lindsley's six month stay in the monastery, one of the biggest lessons he has learned is the importance of the *journey*. "Mediocre Monk" is the story of that journey, and frustration, hunger, and snakes are just a few of the chapters!
Transcending the topic of monks and monasteries, "Mediocre Monk" is about becoming, about striving and letting go, and about the importance of humor and community.
My thanks to the author, publisher, and #NetGally for the chance to read an ARC of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
#MediocreMonk
Spoiler alert... By the end of Lindsley's six month stay in the monastery, one of the biggest lessons he has learned is the importance of the *journey*. "Mediocre Monk" is the story of that journey, and frustration, hunger, and snakes are just a few of the chapters!
Transcending the topic of monks and monasteries, "Mediocre Monk" is about becoming, about striving and letting go, and about the importance of humor and community.
My thanks to the author, publisher, and #NetGally for the chance to read an ARC of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
#MediocreMonk
April 26, 2023
Grant Lindsley gives a very insightful, truthful telling of how one struggles in life, mind, and spirt in deciding to enter a Buddhist monastery. There have been numerous books on the subject of foreigners leaving their life behind to enter a monastery to become a monk. However, there have not been a lot about the daily struggles on what that life might mean or the hardships of living a monastic life. I once thought about doing what Lindsley did, but always thought that I did not have the right mindset or willpower to do it, and Lindsley showed me that I was probably right. Not only does one have this image of what that life entails, but the daily struggle between body and mind. The constant struggle of being hungry and trying to live the life that you think you need to obtain “enlightenment”. I highly recommend this book for anyone who is thinking about doing what Lindley did or wants to just live the experience through his personal journey.
April 24, 2024
The Mediocre Monk offers an engaging and accessible journey into the life of an everyday individual seeking enlightenment through monasticism in Thailand. The author's candid exploration of his thoughts and experiences resonates with readers, offering a glimpse into the universal human quest for meaning and fulfillment.
What stands out is the author's gradual unraveling of the rules and constraints of monastic life, ultimately revealing that beneath the surface, monks and practitioners alike grapple with the same human struggles. From seasoned abbots to novice practitioners, everyone faces inner challenges and doubts. Yet, through the author's introspection, we learn that true enlightenment comes not from adhering to strict doctrines, but from embracing the messy, human aspects of existence.
The Mediocre Monk reminds us that enlightenment is not reserved for the elite or the ascetic, but is accessible to all who are willing to embrace life's complexities with an open heart and mind.
What stands out is the author's gradual unraveling of the rules and constraints of monastic life, ultimately revealing that beneath the surface, monks and practitioners alike grapple with the same human struggles. From seasoned abbots to novice practitioners, everyone faces inner challenges and doubts. Yet, through the author's introspection, we learn that true enlightenment comes not from adhering to strict doctrines, but from embracing the messy, human aspects of existence.
The Mediocre Monk reminds us that enlightenment is not reserved for the elite or the ascetic, but is accessible to all who are willing to embrace life's complexities with an open heart and mind.
March 7, 2023
Mediocre Monk starts out so well. It’s funny and self-effacing and so personal. Lindsley is quick to call out the shortcomings he has before right when the reader is thinking about his hidden and apparent biases. That quick response to an imaginary reader is hard to do and he gets it just right.
The introduction, set up at the monastery, and the original settling in story is intriguing and personal and kept my attention. But midway through the narrative, it became really stagnant. I didn’t follow the nuances of the different monasteries and the learnings in each of them. I got lost with the descriptions of the different monks and their backstories, and felt the chapters did little to divide the narrative up for me.
I felt personally invested in the author’s journey at the top of the book, and felt disinterested by the end.
The introduction, set up at the monastery, and the original settling in story is intriguing and personal and kept my attention. But midway through the narrative, it became really stagnant. I didn’t follow the nuances of the different monasteries and the learnings in each of them. I got lost with the descriptions of the different monks and their backstories, and felt the chapters did little to divide the narrative up for me.
I felt personally invested in the author’s journey at the top of the book, and felt disinterested by the end.
April 21, 2023
Lindsley's story is an easy, interesting read for those of us interested in Buddhism, meditation, and living thoughtfully, but who are unlikely to take on 6 months in an Eastern monastic setting. I struggled, to begin with, with what felt like his "young American-male egotism". But this softened as his vulnerability, humor, and self-deprecating growth unfolded. In truth, he came to be my teacher in several ways around issues with which I struggle.
I'm a fan of good reads about traveling in which you see both the country and the author through the author's eyes. This had all of those qualities, tho' not intended as a "travel-read" - Thailand, monastic community life, and personal psychology. For the kind of journey it is, I gave it 5*.
I'm a fan of good reads about traveling in which you see both the country and the author through the author's eyes. This had all of those qualities, tho' not intended as a "travel-read" - Thailand, monastic community life, and personal psychology. For the kind of journey it is, I gave it 5*.
October 4, 2023
A pleasant surprise. A fun and serious read. A superb integration of tragedy and comedy. I laughed a lot. Glad the author exposed his experience for us to see the humor in as well as the humor in our oft foolish 'spiritual' assumptions and efforts.
A good look into the humanness of monasteries and spiritual aspirants generally. Confirmed my own disenchantment with monastic life after many years of fascination with the thought of it being a more holy or more spiritual life. No more. Sure, the author rightly values the role of monastic life as a viable option for some persons, but it is no more fit for a spiritual life than a multitude of other ways of life.
A good look into the humanness of monasteries and spiritual aspirants generally. Confirmed my own disenchantment with monastic life after many years of fascination with the thought of it being a more holy or more spiritual life. No more. Sure, the author rightly values the role of monastic life as a viable option for some persons, but it is no more fit for a spiritual life than a multitude of other ways of life.
January 2, 2024
An honest account of attempted enlightenment. Lindsley's descriptions of his spiritual struggles were very relatable, his pride at how humble he was becoming, the problem comparisons with other monks, the over eager newbie that gets on your nerves, the inability to concentrate during meditation, and, of course, the battle for control against KIND bars. While I did enjoy his foibles, I also related with his ongoing yearning to become a better person. He may not have been the perfect monk (though he was getting close) but he was a conscientious and honest human being, something we could use more of in our world.
June 9, 2024
This books has a lot of strong suits, a lot of weaker ones, and a lot of room for improvement. At times the writer’s articulations and dialogue seemed pretentious and pessimistic—given the context of his situation having lost a friend it seems valid to an extent. The writer’s insecurity translates into the tone though and that also makes it come off as more cowardly than needed… idk I feel like the writer could have been more assertive with himself and less ruminative in his writing style, and the insecurity in his tone impacts especially how the books quality feels and reads out. There is also a handful of white guilt in the book which feels unsatisfying as well.
April 11, 2023
Incredible book. I've been fortunate enough to know a little bit about Grant's life already, and we have a little bit of similar experiences, but this gave me a deeper insight into the decisions I've known he's made but never talked to him about. His writing style was funny, poignant, and well organized. This was a unique memoir that I would recommend to anyone who wants to read someone with a fresh take on life!
February 26, 2024
As one can surmise from the book, externally the author is a likeable, impressive person. He is brave to share and mock his self-aware unlikeable inner monologue in a unique personal journey. We are fortunate to have him as part of our Carleton Ultimate community, and I wish him all the best as he goes into his next growth experience as a husband and father. The 10 year anniversary of the crash is this week, and my heart goes out to him and all who loved James, Paxton and Goodgame.
July 8, 2023
Very self-perceptive, full of wisdom from *actual* monks in a remote Thai forest monastery.
Narrated as a monologue that reads like a fresh breeze. Loved it as someone interested in buddhism, meditation, and also someone wanting to study the mind in a trendy fashion with an awe-inspiring teacher. Highly recommend!
Narrated as a monologue that reads like a fresh breeze. Loved it as someone interested in buddhism, meditation, and also someone wanting to study the mind in a trendy fashion with an awe-inspiring teacher. Highly recommend!
November 15, 2023
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was refreshing, insightful and very honest. I got a kick out of it, having done some silent meditation retreats myself and having experienced how the mind can become very fixated and at times very grandiose. I felt like I was right there with the author on this journey. The stark honesty and willingness to deeply explore the experience was invigorating.
December 7, 2023
Grant is emotionally lost when there's a car accident of five people and he is one of the two survivors. He decides to get away from everything.He remembered a monk he met in New Zealand who told him about Buddist monasteries in the forests of Thailand. He decides that is for him. So he goes. His experiences for that year restore his faith and willingness to try life again. Very insightful.
January 2, 2024
Glosses over the “practice” with a familiar, modern voice, but barely touches on the loss/grief that is integral to the narrative. I can overlook that though, because good writing can make a mediocre story worthwhile. No heavy lifting here, just a light workout to keep the reading muscles warm.
July 28, 2025
Mediocre Monk was such a refreshing read! I loved how the humor and seriousness were so well intertwined, making the story of self-discovery both relatable and inspiring. A perfect balance of lighthearted moments and deep reflection—highly recommend!
May 16, 2023
This book was such a page turner. I loved every bit of this story and I’m 100% going to re-read. Love the humor in this. Right up my alley
July 5, 2023
Surprisingly funny and refreshingly honest.
Read
July 21, 2023HOOPLA
January 22, 2024
4.5⭐️
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews