From The Shadows: Surviving the Depths of Mental Illness

by E. Pauline Spurrell

After a joyful early childhood, E. Pauline Spurrell suffered trauma that led to unhinged teenage years and a turbulent adult life. She was diagnosed, and misdiagnosed, with numerous mental illnesses. She endured a seemingly endless cycle of prescription treatment, and failure, until one day, enough was enough!

Following years lost to the depths of despair, she fostered ideologies of self-discovery. Spurrell created tools to understand her disorders and their resultant impacts on her life. She reclaimed clarity, found the inner child she had left behind, and emerged from the shadows, a puzzle portrait of perfect imperfections.

This exquisite memoir is sure to appeal to anyone suffering mental illness, as well as those who live with, work with, or love someone with mental illness.

210 pages, Paperback

Published September 28, 2022

Reviews

[Rhonda · Rating 5 out of 5]

In a world where we are finally allowing the elephant in the room and talk about mental illness, it’s easy to forget the stigma that was once so prominent that people suffered in silence ! Pauline’s story is moving , educational and hopeful . I had the honour to meet her briefly and her presence , her Aura was comforting, I knew I had to obtain and copy of her book that day ! I often struggle with reading , my mind often wonders and I’m easily distracted but this book captivated me , I could imagine every detail as described ! I highly recommend, those of you who are struggling will feel grateful for her honesty and relatability! Those who are connected to someone who is struggling will gain insight only a person who has lived a life with mental illness can give and your eyes will be opened and hopefully your heart will fill with empathy ! It’s all that and so much more !

[Melanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I want to thank Pauline for having the courage to write this book. My mother gave it to me as a Christmas gift as I also have a few lovely acronyms as a diagnosis, and it was validating and encouraging to read Pauline’s journey to a healthier place. Times are hard, but I know they can and will get better, and Pauline is further evidence of that.

I also really enjoyed the writing of this book. I opened it and within a few sentences, remarked to myself that Pauline was quite a talented writer. Her prose is never dry, but also doesn’t go too far in the other direction. It’s rich and vibrant and I found myself really enjoying the ride. My one complaint would be the repeated use of terms like “my True North”, it did get a bit tedious and pulled me out of the narrative a bit. Other than that, an absolutely solid read and I’ll definitely be picking up the follow up when it releases.

[Mandy Spurrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the descriptive writing style the author uses. I got lost in the smells, sounds, tastes and textures of her childhood memories. I laughed along with her when she recalled a funny memory I panicked with her and I cried with her. She puts into words the horror, agony and despair so many of us experience but are unable to voice. Thank you, Ms. Spurrell, for sharing your experience and validating us and our illness. We are so grateful.

[Lindsey's Literary Leanings · Rating 5 out of 5]

Insightful, Powerful, Though-Provoking

Genre: Memoir

From The Shadows - Surviving the Depths of Mental Illness by E Pauline Spurrell

When I spotted a post from the Author on Social Media, about this book, I immediately downloaded it to read. Having dealt with my own mental health issues (I find the term 'mental illness' difficult to equate with me, although it's undoubtedly accurate) for the last twenty seven years, I am always intrigued by other people's experiences, whether that be in written form, documentary or talking with someone, and the tools that they have put in place in the fight against it. 📖 📺 🗣

Choosing to record it in the form of a memoir as this Author has done is quite simply, in my opinion, braveness on another level:
1. I cannot imagine anyone being remotely interested in my tussels with 'The black dog', as I choose to call it, and...
2. Writing it down, would mean recalling certain memories, which takes great strength. Especially digging deep to discover what set you on a course to where you find yourself.

Pauline is very comprehensive in her approach to re-telling all that she has been through. She too recognizes that a sizeable quantity of her life was taken over by her decline in mental health, and that, as the sufferer looks back, it is devastating to have had that time taken from you, especially if you let yourself imagine how it could have been. This is also particularly true if it has been responsible for the loss of key elements and people. A point that is eloquently made and one that I can certainly relate to.

Her academic prowess and achievements, through the course of her education and within the workplace, are remarkable and extremely impressive given the many changes she was facing. 📝 📓 🖊
The Author talks about the effects of her illness on her relationship with her partner, who later became her husband, and the confrontations that her behaviour evoked. Me and my partner have definitely had similar stand-offs, although nothing quite as powerful as the shirt or the rocking chair incidents that she describes. I only deal with anxiety and depression, but also have a lot of physical problems which exacerbate the former. I also experience panic attacks. I have, however, known people who have faced the multitude of mental illness that Pauline has known, and I know first-hand, the effects it can have on the sufferer and those around them. Pauline is clearly a very strong woman with a good support network, the latter being so very important. 🤝🫂

She mentions a couple of really good, useful quotes for when things get tough. One of which, I use regularly, as it calms me and helps me to realise that the situation that I am in will end. That quote is, 'This Too Shall Pass'. The quote new to me, and one that am taking away with me is 'Face It, Embrace It and Live Through It'. 🙏

Pauline quotes 'As a society we were not evolved enough to accept the dynamics of mental illness with the same understanding we afford physical illness'. I wonder whether, even to this day, if that has really changed. In my experience neither, mental nor physical illness qualifies a person for the guarantee of being understood. I think that we still have a long way to go, particularly when it comes to how those who have not been through any kind of psychological disorder, perceive and relate to those who have. 🤝👂

My thanks to Pauline, for an honest and insightful account, of such a prolonged life altering period. I am so glad that life is so much healthier for you now.

[Alice · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book delved into mental illness in a way that I’ve never before experienced. This young lady bares her soul in a writing style that flowed perfectly through the pages. It demonstrates her courage and her determination to live a full life despite a mentally unhealthy mind. It definitely educated me into better understanding of the struggles that many people are facing on a daily basis. A book I would highly recommend.

[Kayla Hobbs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book! I laughed and cried while reading it and got lost in the imagery and the beauty of her childhood memories. I felt as though I was walking the road with her on her journey. Great writers have that ability. Looking forward to the next one.

[Chris Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I write as a published author and someone who has suffered with a number of mental issues my life time.This book was very well written by a person who could put her life of suffering into words.I thoroughly enjoyed this story and highly recommend it to people who suffer mental health problems.