Clarkson on Cars

by Jeremy Clarkson

ON CARS (map)

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Cars, Ebooks, Travel, Comedy, Journalism

242 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

About the author

Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson (born April 11, 1960) is an English broadcaster and writer who specialises in motoring.

He writes weekly columns for The Sunday Times and The Sun, but is better known for his role on the BBC television programme Top Gear.

From a career as a local journalist in the north of England, he rose to public prominence as a presenter of the original format of Top Gear in 1988. Since the mid-1990s Clarkson has become a recognised public personality, regularly appearing on British television presenting his own shows and appearing as a guest on other shows. As well as motoring, Clarkson has produced programmes and books on subjects such as history and engineering. From 1998 to 2000 he also hosted his own chat show, Clarkson.

His opinionated but humorous tongue-in-cheek writing and presenting style has often generated much public reaction to his viewpoints. His actions both privately and as a Top Gear presenter have also sometimes resulted in criticism from the media, politicians, pressure groups and the public.

As well as the criticism levelled against him, Clarkson also generated a significant following in the public at large, being credited as a factor in the resurgence of Top Gear to the most popular show on BBC Two, and calls for him to be made Prime Minister. Clarkson himself was keen to downplay his perceived influence on the British public, stating he regularly contradicts himself, and would make a "rubbish" Prime Minister.

Reviews

[AndrewP · Rating 3 out of 5]

A collection of Clarkson's columns originally for the Sunday papers. Because these have been collected together by subject matter they vary greatly in age, ranging from 1985 up to 1996. As a result, a great many of the cars he talks about are no longer around, or at least not very common.

Some fun stuff in here and if you have read any of his other books, or seen him on TV, you know what to expect. Witty no nonsense commentary with the occasional gem of wisdom.

[Marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jeremy Clarkson from the original "Top Gear" television show takes us on a journey through many parts of England particularly, trialing vehicles, attending car launches and automotive shows around the world. He pontificates on bus lanes, old age, babies, and almost every subject under the sun, as he shares with us his insights on good and bad drivers, the state of the roads, and the faults and failings of many cars that have been launched on the market. He picks on the advertisers, the media, politicians, the car assembly firms and religion. The book is a very easy read with many sections only a few paragraphs long. No prior knowledge of the automotive industry needed !

[Bradley · Rating 2 out of 5]

I like Clarkson's later stuff so it was a surprise I didn't warm to his early writings, usually its the reverse with many authors. Most of these articles are outdated (made worse with no dates and therefore context), more whinging pom rant than humorous, and many of the cars he talks about are just too damn European for an Australian to relate to.

[Long Williams · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not PC. Polarising and funny as hell. Typically British which, unfortunately is not common anymore in Britain.

[Ria · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this book, laugh out loud funny and every chapter or "rant" was so short at just a few pages each it was perfect for reading a few of his witticisms at one sitting when short of time.
Sarcastic, blunt, rude, pretty offensive to just about everything and everyone, there is very little left he didn't insult but overall his black sense of humour and witty ripostes totally cracked me up.
Part of the classic and glory years of Top Gear this is a must read for fans of him and also the show.

[Jim · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book feels very dated now, Jeremy is berating Austin Rover and dreading when the Welshman (Neil Kinnock) will get into power. I think he has got better and funnier with age...the later collection "The World According to Clarkson" is much funnier.
Here he is offensive to just about everyone, but its more of a whingeing right wing rant with flashes of humour, than his later works which are laugh out loud funny. Old people are forever driving snail like to beetle drives in Japanese cars. He is quite xenophobic but admires the Italians, because they love fast cars. He is quite misogynistic : "Why do people usually those with bosoms, find it so difficult to park?
For a book entitled "On Cars" there are oddly many sections with barely a mention of cars focusing on other concerns of JC who has a rant and an opinion on just about everything, like BBC Radio:
"Radio 1 is slick, "Our Tune" is a good laugh and Steve Wright is a funny man,but it plays sheer, unadulterated rubbish between the chitchat.
If you are more than twelve, there is Radio 2 with its comfortable disc jockeys in woolly pullies and Vera Lynn. Radio 3 does a good job if you enjoy being shrieked at by a fat tart in a tent and radio 5 is OK for those who want to know what sort of cake the cricket commentators are eating while the turkeys on the field take tea."
I think this tome is really for the fans of Jeremy Clarkson to those who haven't read him start with "The World According to Clarkson" which is much funnier and less dated.

[Mark Schlatter · Rating 3 out of 5]

Probably 3.5 to 4 stars, if it were a bit shorter. This is a collection of Clarkson's early essays --- quite funny at times (assuming you can handle his libertarian point of view), but sometimes repetitive. It's also fairly dated --- the piece on telephones in cars (why would you want one?) screams of the nineties.

My favorite insights from the book involved seeing more thoughtfulness from Clarkson than I expected from his Top Gear persona. Several essays discussed safety issues and the dangers of owning a supercar if you aren't prepared to handle the driving. At the same time, Clarkson will readily argue that speed does not kill --- inattentiveness does.

[Sebastian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hm, seems some people don't like collections of newspaper/magazine articles.

I do. Just the right length for a quick 'dose' of snark before turning out the light and going to bed.

I have read this book more times than I care to count.

[Elena · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very well-written and quite funny. However, a little outdated in this day and age. Also, Clarkson tends to rant which gets a bit tedious at times. Despite all this, it still remains entertaining and I loved reading it.

[B.B. Scott · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great entertainment, Clarkson style. If you love cars, annd enjoy Jeremy's dry, sometime politically incorrect humor, you'll love this easy read.

[Sam Russell · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ok ... some bits funny some bits not. It was long too. Haven't finished it.

[Kai · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is a good book for people who like comedy and cars. This book is a good binge book

[Angela Free · Rating 4 out of 5]

Doesn't matter that I know sweet fanny Adams about cars, JC just makes me laugh. He's so outspoken, but just says what other people think only are afraid to say.

[Ross-Barry Barcock. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very enjoyable and funny.

[Toby · Rating 3 out of 5]

Irreverent humour. Great escapism. An easy and fun read but not recommended if you are easily offended.

[Evan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some parts were entertaining. His trademark use of exaggerated quips are funny to read, but his writing style is like a twisted knot. Otherwise, the book's mostly outdated, I've no idea what celebrity he's referring to, or the car he's talking about, or he just babbles on about British politics.

[Tammy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my genre

[Caya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant.

Although not being fan of Clarkson myself I like to drive and I like cars. This book is still actual and maybe more than ever before.

[Paschalis]

elibrary

[Zalotti · Rating 1 out of 5]

This just wasn't for me. Maybe reading it in 2022 is too late.

[Lynn H · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very Jeremy. Always outspoken but I doubt he would get away with a lot of what is printed here with the new WOKE Generation.

[Frank · Rating 2 out of 5]

Quite enjoyable but not always good. I enjoyed starting the book, but let's start with the length. There's over 100 stories in the book or so. My kindle at least goes up by 1 percent almost every time I finish one, but not always. So there's a lot of information.

The book is filled with articles from Clarkson's time at Performance Cars. He's quite witty, he has some great zingers, and the stories are good to begin with. You get an idea what the life of a professional car reviewer is really like (it's godly).

The first great story in my mind however is a story about big bikes. These zany motorcycles, that now have 4 wheels. That's right, he's talking about four wheelers, the idea of which is novel back in the 1990 but common day now. Still hearing him talk about the scariness of it, or the insanity of it is brilliant.

The problem comes around the 50-60 percent mark. You now have read a lot of stories, and they slowly become less interesting. Remember this is a collection of articles, so you are now talking what probably took years to write (5-6 for the total book? I don't know) being consumed in days. Burnout is possible, but that's not the problem.

The problem is he starts getting into specific cars. I love hearing about car lines, but hearing about how the "new" Honda CRX and their brand new NSX that they are coming out with. The NSX is only 10 years younger than me and unless you want to hear every minute detail about the original edition of the car, what's the point? After 5-6 of these specific articles in a row, I just had to stop.

Perhaps I'll pick it up again but more than likely I'll go to the next book. I did read a lot, but all in all, I wanted more general stories as those are the ones that I find fascinating, not the specific features of the car he is currently reviewing.

[Steve Mitchell · Rating 1 out of 5]

Although I am politically diametrically opposed to Jeremy Clarkson – and therefore many of his opinions – I do find his books to be very witty. (I Know You Got Soul is actually one of my favourite books of all time and was read at a single sitting.) This book however left me feeling angry. I think that because the articles reprinted here date from the mid-1980s to the mid-1990s, the hindsight that I now possess demonstrates that this bigoted and intolerant Tory arsehole does spout a lot of bollocks that a few jokes cannot really cover. Some of his comments are so far wide of the mark that he manages to contradict his own views just a few sentences later. There were a few funny moments here, but on the whole, I would have done a lot better not reading this book and getting ‘I Know You Got Soul’ down for another reading.

[David Szondy]

A collection of Clarkson's columns from the mid-1980s to mid-'90s, Clarkson on Cars airs Mr Clarkson's views on Volkswagen Beetles (Nazi cars), vegetarians (expect everyone to conform to their whims), Beards (just weird), the Jaguar XJS (Glorious) and the usefulness of car performance stats (0 to 60 in 3.4 seconds is less informative than calling it "terrifying").

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[Sabine · Rating 2 out of 5]

Dit is geen boek voor mij. Ik houd namelijk niet van auto's. Maar toen ik tien jaar geleden mijn rijbewijs haalde vond mijn broer het nodig mij dit boek te geven. En eindelijk had ik besloten het eens te gaan lezen.

En Clarkson is best grappig. Ook al is hij ook een enorme hork. Maar grappig vond ik hem vooral om naar te kijken, en op papier komt dat toch minder goed over. Vind ik dan.

Twee sterren.

[Saifullah Shaikh · Rating 2 out of 5]

Much of the humour's a bit dated now ("as sensitive as Ian Botham on the cocaine issue"), and I found myself skipping a lot of the specific-car related articles (eg on the "new" Honda CRX ... I don't care much, 20 years later), but there was enough in there not to have to consign it to the "couldn't finish" shelf.

If you like Clarkson's brand of humour, just watch Top Gear.

[Martin Livings · Rating 2 out of 5]

Now I understand why Clarkson doesn't present Top Gear on his own. As part of a trio, he's quite engaging, but on his own, he's a wee bit tiresome, a bore and a boor at the same time, not as funny as he thinks he is and often not at all. Perhaps this collection isn't one to read all at once, it was a heck of a slog. For devoted Clarkson (and Thatcher) fans only, I'd say.

[Jyv · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was close to halfway through this book and realised that I actually wasn't enjoying it. I can tolerate Clarkson's views on Top Gear but I couldn't stomach a book of it. I thought the book might have some humour in it, but it didn't.

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

Klasický Clarkson - jízlivý, Britům, Francouzům, Američanům ani Japoncům nic nedarující, přesto schopný ocenit dobré auto. Škoda jen, že není u jednotlivých článků datum, člověk by byl schopen víc zasadit obsah do kontextu doby.

[Heidi · Rating 2 out of 5]

Love Jeremy, but I just couldn't get into this book. I read a few of the essays and they were ok, but I had no desire to read all of them. I think this is a compilation of his early career work and obviously he has improved over the years!