I Am More Than My Body: The Body Neutral Journey

by Bethany C. Meyers

From the founder and CEO of the be.come project comes an inspiring introduction to "body neutrality"—the concept of steering away from self-hate without the pressure of having to love your body—and how thinking in this way can lead to joy, peace, and fulfillment.

“Some days I love my body, some days I hate my body, but every day I respect my body.”

A lot of us were raised on toxic diet culture—restrictions, limitations, and deprivation. Then the pendulum swung to the other extreme, with messages that we could love ourselves at any size, any weight, any shape…but sometimes, even that can feel like a lot of pressure. There is a third body neutrality. For many of us, a neutral approach to our physical self—based on compassion, acceptance, and respect—can be a revolutionary, rewarding shift in how we move through the world.

I Am More Than My Body will help you strengthen your relationship with yourself and find balance, steering you away from shame without the pressure of having to love your body at all times. It will introduce a framework to help you practice neutral movement, recognize and arm yourself against bias, act with self-compassion, and navigate your feelings on this journey.

A longtime practitioner of the body-neutral approach, Bethany C. Meyers shares their own story together with the experiences and ideas of experts and activists to help us care for our bodies while not having them dictate our worth. Because happiness comes from honest acceptance, something that body neutrality has the power to help you find.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Audiobook, Mental Health, Adult, Health, Psychology

237 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 27, 2023

Reviews

[Vicious but Romantic · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the first non-fiction book I've finished. And it's mainly because of the author's voice. Not the narration although that was good too but her writing style was simple, straightforward, kind, and inclusive.

She didn't write only about loving your body if it's overweight or after an eating disorder, but also about your journey discovering your gender if that's your life journey.

The point of body neutrality is simple: your body is a tool and not your worth or identity. Listen to it but be kind to yourself. You don't have to force body positivity on yourself just to prove you love your body. And you definitely don't have to achieve perfection to be loved and respected.

100% recommend!

[Kendall · Rating 2 out of 5]

aye first book i’ve finished since august😜

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a plus sized woman with a history of disordered eating, I really appreciated the sense of “body neutrality” in this book. Even though I gave up diet culture a few years ago, I never related to the idea of “body positivity.” I don’t feel positive about my body still. Some days I like or dislike it more than others, but I’ve never felt the way that body positivity says to love your body no matter its size. In I Am More Than My Body, Bethany C. Meyers encourages the idea that your feelings about your body can swing one way or the other, but body neutrality means that overall, you don’t have to love or hate your body. Your body is not all of you. You are so much more than how your body presents you to the world, so you shouldn’t tie your self worth to how you feel about your body.

Although it can seem like easier said than done, I appreciated the tips given by the author and other contributors of how to understand neutrality, and ways that you can try to find more of a balance in your life. You’ll never be perfect, but if you find yourself swinging one way or the other, there are ways you can try to bring yourself back to neutral. I would highly recommend this book for anyone. Everyone has had issues with food and body representation at some point, so the tips in this book can help with your own feelings, and the relationships around you.

Thank you to NetGalley and G.P Putnam for an advanced copy of this book.

[Lauren Coffman · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was such a great & quick listen. The idea of body neutrality is decently new to me, but I loved the takeaway of this book. As a parent, I enjoyed the section featuring Feeding Littles very much. Definitely worth a read!!

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Body neutrality is not an entirely new concept, but it's getting more attention through books like this one. Briefly, it's the idea that our worth is not solely determined by our physical appearance -- and that we can move beyond the love/hate relationship with our bodies by treating ourselves with respect, no matter how we feel on any given day. Meyers offers a simple, straightforward introduction to the topic, with repeated acknowledgment that neutrality may not be enough in the face of external forces such as fatphobia, racism, and lack of disability accommodations. What the author wants readers to take from the book is a set of practices for acknowledging our feelings about our bodies, exploring why those feelings have come up, and reconnecting to our self-worth as human beings. And I really appreciated the reminder that body neutrality is not a one-time goal: like healing in general, it's a process that isn't always linear.

One point made in the book that I haven't seen addressed in quite the same way in other books on the topic is how we can replace exercise or "workouts" with the idea of neutral movement: learning how to move just for the sake of enjoying how it makes you feel. It's an idea that I've personally been trying to adopt for a couple of years, and this offered a really good reminder to me not to get bogged down in checking off exercise for the sake of exercise.

A really good introduction to the topic of body neutrality for those who are looking for new direction on their journey. 4 stars.

Thank you, G. P. Putnam's Sons and NetGalley, for providing an eARC of this book. Opinions expressed here are solely my own.

[Emily O'Brien Miranda · Rating 4 out of 5]

Much of what was explored in this book resonated with me, and I found that I have already been doing a lot of what was discussed. That being said, it took me a long time, with a lot of pain and self-critique to get here. It took until my 30’s to be more neutral, at ease and kind to my body. Examples from the book, such as ditching the scale or speaking kindly to my legs, I have come to on my own, seeing it and a myriad of other examples reaffirmed, and helped me give grace to my past thoughts. Growing up with a family of (phenomenal) athletes, I have struggled with not measuring up, being enough. This book serves as a reminder and a gentle guide to coming into ourselves, that we are more than ok as we are. Honoring feelings, yet not clinging to them as the truth. Much love to Bethany, can’t wait to see what you do next.

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really loved this book and appreciate the new perspective it gave me. It took me a bit longer to get through than other books but body neutrality is a topic I needed to spend some time on and I have learned so much about. Thank you Net Galley and Penguin Random House for the ARC.

If you need a new perspective on dieting, self acceptance & your body, this is a book you’ll want to read,

[Kylie McClain · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book genuinely helped me understand the concept of body neutrality. It provides tools and tips on how to reach a more neutral mindset about your body. It reminds you that it is okay to love your body or even hate your body at times. But, it helps you come back to a neutral point at the end of the day. Your body is not who you are, it is just the vessel in which you move through the world.

[Laura Heimpel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book! For those who have complicated relationships with their bodies, eating, or movement, this book helps to reframe this in narrative away from neither good nor bad, but rather neutral. I enjoyed the self reflective questions at the end of each chapter, and a lot of the quotes resonated with me. This book left me feeling encouraged to continue on my journey of self reflection and body neutrality and would recommend

[Gabby Wood · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 ⭐️

This was a book full of really great advice on how to have a more body neutral outlook. I wish there were some more research to back up whether this outlook is effective, but I think we are moving towards that currently.

[Libby · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best non-fiction books I have read this year! Written in relatable language and broken into digestible chapters and sections, this book was a fast read for me. A valuable read for those looking to explore and understand body neutrality.

[Brenna Oakes · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book! It is a quick read and really gets to the heart of body neutrality. I love the discussion questions that were posed throughout the book and can easily see myself thinking through those on hard body days. I will certainly be looking out for more by this author!

[Myshell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing!!! I love learning new ways we can honor our mind and body in different, kind, neutral ways. I love that Bethany encourages just acceptance of every stage the body goes through, with a deeper understanding of why we go through these things, and the YEARS of diet culture and other people saying to do this do that….I love the neutrality of this book, the gentleness of the steps, and that while encouraging ALL body types it also promotes being healthy not just physically, but emotionally and mentally as well. She did a GREAT JOB and I’d love to read another book from her if she ever wrote another!

[Chelsea · Rating 2 out of 5]

mostly fluff. way too much ranting about infertility. overall a good message, way too buzzfeed-writing-style for me though.

[Aisling · Rating 3 out of 5]

This had some very tangible advice for achieving body neutrality but was perhaps less heavy on the psychology side than I was looking for

[Rachel Pollock · Rating 4 out of 5]

An excellent book for adolescents, young adults, and parents who want to shield their children from the effects of diet culture and the body-image obsessions perpetuated by Hollywood and advertising.

[Alison Riley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well-written and thought-provoking primer on body neutrality.

What a thoughtful and absorbing read this was. I have been aware of the tenants of body positivity, intuitive eating, and (to some degree) body neutrality previously, but this really brought the latter into clear focus. The author shares her personal and often painful experiences with body issues, as well as those of many others from diverse backgrounds to give a varied picture of how body neutrality could potentially manifest itself in the reader’s life. Her acknowledge/explore/reconnect framework is particularly useful, but there are many other actionable pieces of advice throughout, and Meyers even aggregates/distills them in a collection at the end of the text. The author describes the work as “the beginning of a journey” and although I’m not at the beginning of mine, I loved reading her take on these practices to support viewing our bodies with respect and dignity, regardless of the ups and downs of everyday life.

[Kelly Pramberger · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a woman that struggles with body acceptance I was eager to read Meyers’ new book. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC! It is a super helpful and insightful story all about the ways we can come to a neutrality where we can be at peace with our own body. Five stars!

[Francescajemm · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a hard book to rate because while I absolutely agree with the premise and the underlying philosophy, most of the book felt highly repetitive to me. Nonetheless - I’m glad it’s in the world!

[Ryo · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received a copy of this book for free in a Goodreads giveaway.

Short and simple introduction to the idea of body neutrality, which I was not familiar with before reading this book. I liked the approach, that instead of the toxic positivity of loving your body no matter what and then failing when you don't feel totally positive about it, you give yourself the space to acknowledge negative feelings about your body and allow yourself to feel them without guilt. There's also a lot of input from other people of different sizes and races and genders from the author, and they provide some valuable perspectives. I was particularly surprised by how people who are viewed as overweight are often given substandard medical care, where doctors blame many problems on the patient's weight alone rather than actually addressing the issue like they would with people who are not seen as overweight. That's an aspect of anti-fat bias that I had not considered before. The chapter about letting go, while it contained good advice about surrendering and the harm of wanting to be in control too much, didn't seem particularly connected to body neutrality specifically, or at least was not written in a way that connected the chapter to the main topic. It instead focused on work-related things and the author's own pregnancy struggles. I also (selfishly) wanted more input from men in the book; out of the many people quoted in the book, only two of them use "he" as a pronoun, and one of them prefers "they." I have in the past been shamed for my body in a way that I strongly suspect I wouldn't have had I been a woman, and because body shame and image issues are things that men seem to discuss less than women do, I would have really appreciated more from that perspective (again, I realize, selfishly). Also, I realize this is an advance reader copy, but there were a noticeable amount of typos, to the point that it was a bit distracting, especially where there seemed to be whole chunks of sentences missing, particularly in the dark boxes with bullet points and questions. This was overall a good, short introduction to the idea of body neutrality, though.

[Niki Clark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks to this book, I have been given an entirely new way to think about things. I will most likely be referring back to this book often. I consider myself in eating disorder recovery because while I’m not starving myself anymore or over exercising, there are still battles I fight to survive and thrive.

Below are excerpts from the book I found particularly helpful and useful:

- Any body standard is toxic.

- You can have a bad body image day and still be a bad ass.


- A thin person can walk down the street eating an ice cream cone without an ounce of judgment from anyone they pass and a fat person cannot. Those living in larger bodies are subjected to negative discrimination in employment, education, and healthcare even in relationships.

- Before we judge anyone or compare their struggles with our own, we have to Understand how much of human experience is unquantifiable.

- We should not feel guilty about doing whats best for ourselves. Ask yourself what makes the most sense for you?

- One of the many reasons we should never comment on a person‘s body is we don’t know the measures. It has taken to have that body.

- What would it look like if we rephrased workout and exercise with the word movement.

- When you separate exercise from having the sole goal of changing your body and instead allow it to be a place for repair, release, rejuvenation it’s likely you’ll find freedom in your new movement practice.

- All movement is valid movement. When you put your body and needs first, whatever shows up is what you needed that day. Remember your body is wise. and you are a living miracle. Trust yourself. on your neutral movement journey.

[Lisa Weldy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing this e-ARC in exchange for my honest review.

Publication date 6/27/23

This book is a great introduction to the concept of body neutrality, which is not the same as body positivity. Meyers uses a casual and gentle tone when giving the readers a primer to the concept, and then uses specific examples and suggestions to further illustrate her points.

I had heard of body neutrality before reading this book, but wasn't super familiar with the concept, so I appreciated learning more, especially in regards to eating disorders and exercise. There is a section on pregnancy which wasn't relevant to me personally, but I still found it interesting.

A short, easy read, and I'd recommend to readers interested in learning more about body neutrality. Possible trigger warnings include discussions of eating disorders and compulsive exercise.

[Bookish · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a quick and enjoyable listen (I chose the audiobook format) as an introduction to the topic of body neutrality. I was not familiar with this particular term, though as a psychologist, I am aware of the concept. For those unfamiliar, body neutrality is the middle ground between the body positivity/HAES movement and body dysmorphia. It is a stance that I personally align with, as I tend to see both sides of any given perspective, and usually fall somewhere in the center myself. I was hoping the book would focus more on the clinical research of the body neutrality movement, but this was more anecdotal based on the author’s personal experiences. That being said, it was very user-friendly for the lay person, and I would recommend it as a good overview before deciding if you’d like to delve deeper into the topic in the future.

[Callie Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a must-read for anyone open to the fluidity and growth of body neutrality. Bethany candidly shares her experience and the thought processes and habits that needed to be changed before they were able to recover from disordered eating into a place of healing. I appreciate the ability she had in this book to acknowledge the differences in opinions on this topic and the need for open conversations in order to advocate for societal change. I will definitely be reading this one over and over and using it as a tool to aid me in days where negative thoughts and feelings pervade my mind.

Shoulder kisses xx

[Amber · Rating 3 out of 5]

Body neutrality is in that middle point between toxic positivity and body shaming - it is about accepting your body as it is. I absolutely strive to live this style and think it is a powerful way to be respectful of our physical and emotional needs.
I hadn't heard of the author beforehand, but after looking into who they are, I am a bit surprised that they didn't engage with gender expression throughout. Especially because this book is highly personalized to her and her life experiences. Perhaps they wanted to keep the book focused on the body as a body, not as an expression of our inner selves?

[Katie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I probably would have gotten more out of this book if I hadn’t already read other books about body neutrality; it is a good, simple introduction to the topic. I disagree with the comments that this book was too repetitive: I actually thought that it was too meandering and didn’t really have any sort of structure tying it together. In particular, the last chapter was entirely about the author’s infertility journey and I didn’t fully grasp the connection to body neutrality. I did appreciate the tips on raising body neutrality children, and the section on neutral movement, but overall got more out of other resources on body neutrality.

[Kaitlin Presnell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really, truly loved this book. I have always had a tough relationship with my body and struggled with my relationship with food. This book really make me think about the way I think about myself, my body, and with movement. Body neutrality is something I have been working on and will continue to work on every day. I was already obsessed with Bethany after following their journey on Instagram and I knew I would love this book. I have recommended this one to so many people already and I know I will read it again and again. Thank you so much for the opportunity to read this early!

[Sara Mann · Rating 4 out of 5]

I rounded up but it was a 3.5!

What I liked - The questions that she gave throughout the book for readers to dig deeper and journal are excellent and incredibly helpful. Her views on body neutrality I found to be incredibly helpful as a person who has recovered from a severe eating disorder myself. I loved her advice on exercise. I think it is a great book for anyone in recovery from an ED to read. She also takes it form the perspective of infertility which was good too.

What I didn't like - I'm not into all the gender fluid stuff.

[Anna Marston · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars / A much-needed, concise overview of what body neutrality actually is. I love Bethany Meyers and her work focused on inclusive, body-neutral movement. I listened to this on Audible but I plan to purchase a hard copy to have on-hand and refer back to :)

“There is something that is a bit terrifying in letting go of your body in certain ways and not having it be the most important thing about you”

[Christa · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a fat person, I'm pretty familiar with the body-positivity and body-neutrality movements, so this wasn't really anything new to me. It was comforting to have a book that understood a lot of my own body issues, even while the author acknowledges that she has always had a "socially acceptable" body (slim, white). Someone doesn't have to be like me to allow me to feel heard and seen, so that's nice.