How to Live with a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much

by Richard Jacob, Owen Thomas

Is Bigger Really Better?
 
Here at last is the first self-help book for men with Oversized Male Genitalia (OMG), a genetic birth defect that grows the penis to absurd proportions. Every year, thousands of men are diagnosed with OMG. Sadly, most are banished to the fringes of society, victims of their own freakish length and girth. How to Live with a Huge Penis brings them an inspiring message of tolerance and hope—along with helpful information on
 
     •  Unzipping: Coming Out to Your Friends and Family
     •  Sharing Your Pain: Sexual Intercourse with a Huge Penis
     •  Big Blessings: Unexpected Advantages of a Huge Penis
     •  and much, much more
 
Complete with prayers, poetry, a daily affirmations journal, and thoughtful quotations from leading self-help experts, How to Live with a Huge Penis will inspire men of all shapes and sizes.
 

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Self Help, Comedy, Sexuality, Health, Science

128 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2009

Reviews

[Kenny]

How to Live with a Huge Penis will inspire men of all shapes and sizes.
How to Live with a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much Richard Jacob & Owen Thomas


This book was given to me as a gift by a former paramour who truly missed me ... It's become my bible.

[David]

Even though this gift was ironic in nature -- and trust me, is it ever! -- that won't stop me from placing it between Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn's Gulag Archipelago, Volume 1 and Immanuel Kant's Critique of Pure Reason on my bookshelf. I am hoping someone (anyone!) will peruse my multicolored spines -- which allude to my general seriousness and gravity -- and get entirely the wrong idea. (I just hope that someone isn't my mother. Ew.) If that someone (again, NOT my mother) were a prospective sexual partner (after she's been fingerprinted, checked for communicable diseases, and run through a complicated vetting system) or prospective urologist, it would of course be a case of bait-and-switch. Like when Best Buy advertises a sale on Sony 170" Plasma 3-D television sets for $399, but they only ever had one, so they'll cut you a deal on this old dusty JVC piece-of-shit (19", giant tube, fake wood casing, dials) they've had sitting in the break room. I'm not saying that my penis is a JVC, but it's certainly not going to come out on top on the Consumer Reports comparison shopping chart. But it's serviceable. Meaning that it has been serviced before. Beyond that, you'll just have to love me for me. Circumcised. Average. Chafed. Shopworn.

Anyway. You know what? This book is really funny! I'm not even kidding you. (I have to believe that, otherwise I have the sense of humor of a twelve-year-old boy.) Okay, don't believe me? Go to the humor section of your local big box bookstore -- perhaps the Barnes and Noble flagship store in Union Square? -- and pick up this book. If you are a man, be sure to hold the book up high, so passersby can see it, but make sure you step away from the humor section and go stand by the health/self-help section. Scratch your chin as you leaf through it, and occasionally nod at the words on the page and say, 'Mm-hmm' in affirmation, as if you have finally found the understanding and compassion you have been looking for. Is this immature? Imbecilic? Pointless? You bet. That's what's so great about it.

Thanks, Michelle Weinman! (I think!)

[Elysa]

I bought this as a Christmas gift for my boyfriend. He opened it in front of his parents. And his grandmother.

[SheReadsALot]

Finally I can learn how to live with this. I've been poking out eyes since the creation of my nonexistent huge penis.

Now a guide to provide help.

[notgettingenough]

Who would have thought that penises would have such taste :)


http://alittleteaalittlechat.wordpres...

[Lubinka Dimitrova]

Thank goodness that I chose to read this for purely academic purposes, and was not myself in desperate need of practical advice and guidance. In that aspect the book was rather useless, seeing how it's borderline depressing, not to mention utterly unfunny. Suck it up, guys, there are much worse problems than OMG (oversized male genitalia) in this world, such as the condemningly fatal SBS (Sh*t for Brains Syndrome) whose victims among us are not only terribly suffering themselves, but are causing pain to all those around them.

[Don Schminkey]

Reading this book as an OMG sufferer gave me the courage to unzip to my family. My kids cried. My friends mourned our lost friendship. My co-workers won’t look me in the eyes. It’s a tragic plight, but I’m happier than ever being free of my secret. Now I sit here and wait for acceptance.

This is a fun, well handled, conversation piece. Then there’s the book, it’s okay too. :-)

[Tom]

I am kidding. I have no need to read this book. Sadly.
But gosh, all those poor guys. How they must suffer.
hahahahahahahahahhahahah

[Manny]

Yesterday, I was sitting on the train, lost in gloomy thoughts inspired by reading Voices from Chernobyl, when I suddenly became aware of hysterical laughter from the other side of the aisle. Three 20-something women were watching The Sweetest Thing on their laptop with the sound turned well up. They had just reached The Penis Song. I couldn't help watching too.

If you aren't familiar with this masterpiece, check it out now! It's terrific.

[Janna]

A friend recommended this book to me, saying it would help me with my depression. Truly, this book helped tremendously by talking about the issues we too often tend to overlook!

[Chris Rodriguez]

Still having problems but just living one inch at a time.

[Briana]

This book was recommended to me by a member of New Zealand Women in Medicine. This is more of a personal-experience, anecdotal guide than a textbook, and short on references, but still useful for practical advice to give to patients.

As a doctor, I am aware that 50% of my patients are male. It is ridiculous how we have entire departments dedicated to women's health, but not once in medical school have we had lectures on the physiological and psychological struggles of oversized male genitalia (OMG). I do not want to be the sort of doctor who doffs all the "nuts and guts" to my poor male colleagues while I get to play with babies and enjoy my "lifestyle" specialty, just because it's a difficult and gruesome topic.

It is a fact of medicine that we will encounter penises no matter what we specialise in, from psychiatry to the emergency department. This book should be compulsory reading for all medical professionals, young and old.

[Dries De Smet]

Gekregen van Femke

Nog bij niet veel boeken luidop gelachen, en al zeker niet in een trein tijdens de spits. Echt goe!

Wel veel Amerikaanse referenties dat ik niet echt begreep.

[David Bourgeois]

Very helpful, glad to see someone finally address these issues I struggle with everyday

[Jules]

"When you give yourself, you receive more than you give"

From this year resolution:
-read a ridiculous book: check
-avoid non-medical books about dicks: failed
-ride an unicorn-pig: _______

For a book about huge things it was disappointingly short. It also has this shape (taller and rather narrow) because it has a scale in it to measure your own… pygmy. If you own one. Overall, to give an idea, the author is giving medical advice in the same fashion Monty Python is teaching religion. Also, there is no point in buying the electronic version of it.

[Edouard Laverdiere]

Ce livre m’a sauvé la vie. Souffrant depuis mon plus jeune âge du syndrome OMG (Oversize Male Genitalia), je croyais être le seul à vivre avec ce problème… Je me suis longtemps fait intimider et traiter de toutes sortes de noms comme « HOCO » (horse cock), et mon estime de moi en a pris un sérieux coup.

Grâce à ce livre, j’ai enfin réalisé que je n’étais pas seul dans cette situation. De grands hommes comme Albert Einstein et Abraham Lincoln auraient eux aussi souffert du syndrome OMG et ont pourtant réussi à accomplir de grandes choses!

Ce livre m’a permis de reprendre confiance en moi et m’a donné plusieurs astuces et conseils pour franchir l’étape du Unzipping (le coming out) puis apprendre à vivre une vie normale malgré cette condition.

À tous ceux qui vivent avec le même problème, sachez que vous n’êtes pas seuls. Je vous recommande fortement ce livre. Il pourrait lui aussi changer votre vie.

[M]

didn't help, still too big

[Kyle C]

Wasn't expecting such a short book...

I felt it was important to gain insight and perspective to read the struggles of others...walk a mile in their metaphorical underwear if you will... ;)

[Jason]

YES.. BECAUSE I AM GOING TO TAKE A ROLLING PIN TO MY COCK!.... seriously?!

I was all too fascinated by the supersized lads... that's until i read this book.

but some of the stuff is scary like taking a rolling pin to your junk? really? is that really necessary? Apparently this is only necessary if you are beyond 8 in (Percent Of Population With Smaller Dicks 99.4963792682%. stop lying boys!)

I no longer want a supersized junk.

book... is.... hilarious!

[Ka He]

I bought the book because of the funny title and to put it in the rear tray of my car.

[Jorgen]

Hilarious. I never knew of this enormous problem before. I can only hope I will respond more understanding when someone in my environment outs himself...

[⋆☆☽ Jen ☾☆⋆]

★★★½☆
LMAOOOOO

Rtc.

[Yoav Mishaeli]

I would like to thank Dr. Richard Jacob and Rev. Owen Thomas for the opportunity to learn from the wisdom and expertise portrayed in their book. Back in my day, there wasn't much acceptance to our condition. People used to mock and tease us endlessly for something we have no control over. Back then people weren't aware of the adversities of having such shlongs. Not to mention that those who were aware of them, were usually disingenuous. But nowadays, thanks to you and the OMG community, people are now less oblivious to our condition nor nearly as hostile toward us like they used to. The techniques and methods taught in the book aided me in my fight against discrimination and I hereby call every OMG sufferer out there to grab hold of this book ASAP. I wish us all the best and may one day society will accept us for who we soothly are... Fellow Human Beings.

[Tecles Sergio Alfred]

An easy to read book that uses humour to give a piece of advice to a seemingly inexistent problem that make life more difficult for the ones that are affected by it. The book contains a lot of real stories that contain the family, friends or society reactions towards this differentiator and as one of the authors puts it "makes us think that we are just a bunch of animals and we deserve whatever God throws at us". It definitely makes you learn to love your body even more, appreciate what you have, make the most out of what you have and to be confident in any circumstances.

[Nathan Deckinga]

This is a great book to leave out in a public place for your daughter and her boyfriend to find. If needed, they can get helpful advice and know that your home is a safe place to talk about OMG with people who have experience dealing with that particular birth defect.

[Петър Стойков]

Идиотска книга с някакви ... не знам даже дали са нефелни опити за бъзици. Ако смяташ Комиците за върха на комедията... абе пак няма да ти е смешна. Не знам дали е излишно да казвам, че няма нищо общо с темата на заглавието.

[Dylan Van Tongeren]

Enorm veel aan gehad, geweldig zelfhulpboek. Shoutout naar alle oversized male genitalia (omg) sufferers everywhere!

[Gabriele]

It was a gift...

[Tobias]

Kun lest ut av nysgjerrighet, and boy was I surprised 😅

[Sally Heneghan]

Got this as a birthday gift from my dear roommate and it now lives on my nightstand. Would go as far as to call this the modern day bible! Essential read for all.