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Understanding People
Understanding People 'Every attempt to help people must first begin with an effort to understand people,' says Dr. Larry Crabb. 'And the only fully reliable source of information on that topic is the Bible.' In this Gold Medallion Award-winning classic, Dr. Crabb affirms the power of the Scriptures to address the intricacies and deep needs of the human heart. Exploring the inseparable link between spiritual and psychological realities, Understanding People offers a vital lens on how we're put together---who we really are and what makes us tick in our relationships with other people, with God, and with ourselves. In three parts, this book first points us to the Bible as our source of insight into perplexing heart issues. Then it helps us come to grips with our brokenness as God's image-bearers, and it shows how we can reclaim our ability to reflect him in our growth toward maturity and healed relationships.
224 pages, Hardcover
First published October 30, 1987
122 people are currently reading
545 people want to read
About the author
Larry Crabb
112 books238 followersLawrence J. Crabb Jr.
Larry Crabb is a well-known Christian psychologist, conference and seminar speaker, Bible teacher, and author of more than 25 books—including his most recent, When God’s Ways Make No Sense and two Gold Medallion award-winners Inside Out and Understanding People. He is also the founder/director of NewWay Ministries & most recently his "legacy ministry", LargerStory.com. In addition to various other speaking and teaching opportunities, Crabb offers a week-long School of Spiritual Direction held each year here at The Cove and the Glen Eyrie in CO. He currently is scholar-in-residence at Colorado Christian University. Larry and his wife of 50 years, Rachael, reside near Charlotte, N.C.
Larry Crabb is a well-known Christian psychologist, conference and seminar speaker, Bible teacher, and author of more than 25 books—including his most recent, When God’s Ways Make No Sense and two Gold Medallion award-winners Inside Out and Understanding People. He is also the founder/director of NewWay Ministries & most recently his "legacy ministry", LargerStory.com. In addition to various other speaking and teaching opportunities, Crabb offers a week-long School of Spiritual Direction held each year here at The Cove and the Glen Eyrie in CO. He currently is scholar-in-residence at Colorado Christian University. Larry and his wife of 50 years, Rachael, reside near Charlotte, N.C.
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March 10, 2022
În această carte autorul încearcă să prezinte o modalitate prin care putem să ajungem la o înțelegere biblică asupra oamenilor. Larry Crabb își folosește vasta experiență ca și consilier, cât și cunoștiințele deținute despre psihologie, împreună cu o atentă gândire asupra condiției umane pentru a încerca să ofere un ghid despre ce presupune cu adevărat o cunoaștere a oamenilor. Evitând explicații mult prea complexe dar totuși nesimplificând lucrurile printr-o spiritualizare simplistă și ieftină, autorul reușește în cele două sute de pagini să îți provoace viziunea asupra lumii, emoțiile ascunse și felul în care ai ales până acum să te aperi de durere și să îți păstrezi independența față de Dumnezeu. Toate acestea sub îndrumarea Scripturii și nedepășind limitele impuse de acestea.
Citind această carte ești provocat să te înțelegi în primul rând pe tine, pentru ca mai apoi să poți ajunge să îi înțelegi și pe ceilalți. Sunt determinată să acord o atenție sporită vieții interioare și să o fac o prioritate spirituală, deoarece am realizat că profunzimea umană nu este doar o poveste adusă din psihologie, ci o realitate creată de Dumnezeu, care trebuie investigată, înțeleasă și adusă sub Lumina Scripturii, pentru ca pocăința să fie autentică și cu impact.
Cred că din această carte lipsește accentul pus pe lucrarea Duhului Sfânt în viața
credinciosului, modul în care Duhul Sfânt este acela ce, în final, ne dă puterea să ne schimbăm interiorul și să avem o prezență simțită în manifestarea dragostei noastre. De asemenea, autorul insistă că problemele emoționale de natură anorganică pot fi analizate din perspectiva descrisă de carte, însă în urma cercetărilor din ultimele decenii, s-a descoperit o legătură din ce în ce mai mare chiar și între problemele de natură organică și gândurile/credințele disfuncționale după care o persoană își ghidează viața, lucru ce ar merita adus în discuție în prezent.
Un ultim aspect ce m-a impresionat este revelația faptului că o viață trăită în
dependență față de Dumnezeu nu elimină confuzia resimțită trăind într-o lume decăzută și că dorința de a elimina confuzia poate de fapt să crească controlul pe care îl exercităm noi, depărtându-ne de Dumnezeu și creând o realitate ciuntită. Până acum am crezut că oamenii puternici și înțelepți sunt aceia pentru care viața are sens și o pricep în mare măsură și unde
confuzia nu își are locul, însă acum mă simt mai liberă să mă încred în Dumnezeu, chiar și în mijlocul confuziei.
Citind această carte ești provocat să te înțelegi în primul rând pe tine, pentru ca mai apoi să poți ajunge să îi înțelegi și pe ceilalți. Sunt determinată să acord o atenție sporită vieții interioare și să o fac o prioritate spirituală, deoarece am realizat că profunzimea umană nu este doar o poveste adusă din psihologie, ci o realitate creată de Dumnezeu, care trebuie investigată, înțeleasă și adusă sub Lumina Scripturii, pentru ca pocăința să fie autentică și cu impact.
Cred că din această carte lipsește accentul pus pe lucrarea Duhului Sfânt în viața
credinciosului, modul în care Duhul Sfânt este acela ce, în final, ne dă puterea să ne schimbăm interiorul și să avem o prezență simțită în manifestarea dragostei noastre. De asemenea, autorul insistă că problemele emoționale de natură anorganică pot fi analizate din perspectiva descrisă de carte, însă în urma cercetărilor din ultimele decenii, s-a descoperit o legătură din ce în ce mai mare chiar și între problemele de natură organică și gândurile/credințele disfuncționale după care o persoană își ghidează viața, lucru ce ar merita adus în discuție în prezent.
Un ultim aspect ce m-a impresionat este revelația faptului că o viață trăită în
dependență față de Dumnezeu nu elimină confuzia resimțită trăind într-o lume decăzută și că dorința de a elimina confuzia poate de fapt să crească controlul pe care îl exercităm noi, depărtându-ne de Dumnezeu și creând o realitate ciuntită. Până acum am crezut că oamenii puternici și înțelepți sunt aceia pentru care viața are sens și o pricep în mare măsură și unde
confuzia nu își are locul, însă acum mă simt mai liberă să mă încred în Dumnezeu, chiar și în mijlocul confuziei.
November 14, 2024
I wrestled with the first few chapters and Crabb's underlying premise. He tended to say things that sounded anti-intellectual, but then he would contradict himself a paragraph later. I'm still a little confused. Other than that, I appreciated his ideas about counseling. The main idea that stuck with me is that self-protection keeps us from honest, vulnerable relationships, and that independence keeps us from full dependence on God.
June 27, 2021
The. Best. Book. I have read on understanding people. I don’t agree with every detail, and Crabb gets pretty technical and tedious in some areas, but overall, a book I would highly recommend to anyone who has a desire to understand not just the “what” but the “why” behind the actions of themselves and others.
September 30, 2022
a few remarks:
1) Crabb’s charts aren’t comprehensible—and not helpful
2) Crabb’s ‘longings’ are a lesser version of Augustine’s theology of desire
- All the positive points of Crabb are found in Augustine, but there is a more robust theology/anthropology in Augustine.
1) Crabb’s charts aren’t comprehensible—and not helpful
2) Crabb’s ‘longings’ are a lesser version of Augustine’s theology of desire
- All the positive points of Crabb are found in Augustine, but there is a more robust theology/anthropology in Augustine.
July 21, 2024
This book is about Biblical counseling.
Sentences that I liked:
"Each of us fervently wants someone to see us exactly as we are, warts and all, and still accept us. Because no other human being can ever see all of us, a nagging doubt clouds even the best relationships: what would they think of me if they knew that …?
The thought that someone can remain warmly committed to us even with all our faults exposed is utterly inconceivable — yet we long for that experience.
Whenever we turn to anyone other than God to satisfy our deepest longing for relationship, we will be disappointed. Guaranteed! Not even the best parents in the world or the most loving spouse can give me what I crave: pure, undiluted love.
Christian joy, it must be remembered, is always a by-product of following Christ.
Whatever we turn to in order to find satisfaction becomes our god.
Because the very core of our thinking is corrupted with the lie that we can find life apart from God, our beliefs about moral issues are likely to be wrong.
It is therefore true people do not see themselves clearly until they are exposed by another.
People are responsible because they are free.
Life in a fallen world means that pain is inevitable.
We are to welcome difficulties as friends, to rejoice always, and to rest in God’s kind intentions toward us. But joy now is not to replace suffering and pain, it is to support us through it. Our Lord was a man of sorrows even as he delighted in pursuing his Father’s will. He endured much suffering as he focused on the joy ahead.
A commitment to trust the Lord deeply with the core of our being can turn every emotion, even the most painful, into constructive avenues for more fully pursuing God.
The task of counseling is identical to the task of the church: promoting maturity.
Love really is the answer. It is the defining mark of the Christian, the visible measure of maturity.
When life is exposed for what it really is, the only reasonable options are turning to Christ, suicide, or returning to some level of denial (which is nothing more than building a house on sand).
In the deepest part of every soul is a hunger that will only be fully satisfied in heaven.
Without learning what it means to richly depend on Christ for the life that my soul craves and to repent of sinful movement away from God, all improvement is superficial, no matter how apparently meaningful or satisfying."
Sentences that I liked:
"Each of us fervently wants someone to see us exactly as we are, warts and all, and still accept us. Because no other human being can ever see all of us, a nagging doubt clouds even the best relationships: what would they think of me if they knew that …?
The thought that someone can remain warmly committed to us even with all our faults exposed is utterly inconceivable — yet we long for that experience.
Whenever we turn to anyone other than God to satisfy our deepest longing for relationship, we will be disappointed. Guaranteed! Not even the best parents in the world or the most loving spouse can give me what I crave: pure, undiluted love.
Christian joy, it must be remembered, is always a by-product of following Christ.
Whatever we turn to in order to find satisfaction becomes our god.
Because the very core of our thinking is corrupted with the lie that we can find life apart from God, our beliefs about moral issues are likely to be wrong.
It is therefore true people do not see themselves clearly until they are exposed by another.
People are responsible because they are free.
Life in a fallen world means that pain is inevitable.
We are to welcome difficulties as friends, to rejoice always, and to rest in God’s kind intentions toward us. But joy now is not to replace suffering and pain, it is to support us through it. Our Lord was a man of sorrows even as he delighted in pursuing his Father’s will. He endured much suffering as he focused on the joy ahead.
A commitment to trust the Lord deeply with the core of our being can turn every emotion, even the most painful, into constructive avenues for more fully pursuing God.
The task of counseling is identical to the task of the church: promoting maturity.
Love really is the answer. It is the defining mark of the Christian, the visible measure of maturity.
When life is exposed for what it really is, the only reasonable options are turning to Christ, suicide, or returning to some level of denial (which is nothing more than building a house on sand).
In the deepest part of every soul is a hunger that will only be fully satisfied in heaven.
Without learning what it means to richly depend on Christ for the life that my soul craves and to repent of sinful movement away from God, all improvement is superficial, no matter how apparently meaningful or satisfying."
November 2, 2022
My opinion is that this book is miss titled. A more correct title would be, “A guide to Christian counseling.“.
The information in regard to Christian counseling is extensive and went over my head. The book would be better if you read the actual physical book. I listened to the audiobook. If you listen to the audiobook it will require you to do a lot of visualization to understand some of the points.
As a Christian counseling book this is probably a four-star or five-star book. but as a book titled, “understanding people” it doesn’t work to help you understand people. It does work to help you understand the various different theories of counseling.
The information in regard to Christian counseling is extensive and went over my head. The book would be better if you read the actual physical book. I listened to the audiobook. If you listen to the audiobook it will require you to do a lot of visualization to understand some of the points.
As a Christian counseling book this is probably a four-star or five-star book. but as a book titled, “understanding people” it doesn’t work to help you understand people. It does work to help you understand the various different theories of counseling.
Read
August 29, 2023Such helpful charts and diagrams!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 7, 2025
HIGHLY recommend for all Christians!
May 15, 2016
Understanding people: Why we long for relationship (1987/2013) by Larry Crabb is an excellent book essentially dealing with anthropology. The book is divided into three sections. The first, entitled "A Sufficient Bible" begins by exploring how people come to know things and then Crabb moves on to an argument for the sufficiency of scripture, rightly conceived. He effectively addressed the common ways in which people tend to treat the Bible when it comes to psychological difficulties: 1) it has no place because it doesn't directly address every human problem, 2) it is our only focus because it does answer questions, and 3) it is sufficient because it provides categories for thinking and conceptualizing.
Having made his argument that the Bible is a sufficient guide for relational living--again, rightly conceived--in the second section he addressed the issue of anthropology on a deeper level, with specific attention to how he understands what it means to be made in the image of God. After some more theoretical and foundational writing, he comes to the point where he describes all people as personal beings who long deeply, rational beings who think, volitional beings who choose, and emotional beings who feel. Too often, various segments of the church downplay some of these aspects rather than trying to keep them in right balance. He concluded the book with a short third section discussing the evidence and essence of Christian maturity.
Overall, I really appreciated this book. I read one reviewer who lamented that earlier sections of the book were too academic or theoretical, but I admit I didn't see that at all. Understanding people, as Crabb clearly suggests, cannot be accomplished by 5 easy steps. He effectively described an effective model for understanding God's image bearers.
Having made his argument that the Bible is a sufficient guide for relational living--again, rightly conceived--in the second section he addressed the issue of anthropology on a deeper level, with specific attention to how he understands what it means to be made in the image of God. After some more theoretical and foundational writing, he comes to the point where he describes all people as personal beings who long deeply, rational beings who think, volitional beings who choose, and emotional beings who feel. Too often, various segments of the church downplay some of these aspects rather than trying to keep them in right balance. He concluded the book with a short third section discussing the evidence and essence of Christian maturity.
Overall, I really appreciated this book. I read one reviewer who lamented that earlier sections of the book were too academic or theoretical, but I admit I didn't see that at all. Understanding people, as Crabb clearly suggests, cannot be accomplished by 5 easy steps. He effectively described an effective model for understanding God's image bearers.
September 25, 2017
I'm not convinced anyone's construal of the human person can perfectly include all the elements of who we are. That being said I appreciated this book a lot:
1. Crabb does a good cursory job of overviewing different approaches to Scripture in Biblical/Christian counseling. His position is more nuanced that I was expecting. He suggests that the Word of God is sufficient for biblical counseling but this does not mean Christians need to eschew or be suspicious of insights from modern psychology. Essentially, he suggests we ought to understand the Bible well, glean from psychology what seems compatible with the Scriptures, and then test it again with the Scriptures (especially the wisdom literature).
2. Crabb treats the personal, rational, volitional, and emotional sides of the person as important. Though I don't agree with all of his logic and his diagrams are confusing at times (I don't get how his circles work), he adequately treats these areas.
3. I just finished reading "On Being Truly Human" by Eberhard Jungel where, using Luther's distinction between act and personhood on the basis of justification by faith, concludes that to be truly human is to receive your justification from God so that you do not have to provide your own self-realization. This frees you to love. Crabb's conclusion about Christian maturity is strikingly close to this. He believes that the Christian receives his identity and wholeness from God, therefore he does not need to be self-defensive. Also, Christian maturity is expressed through love in community rather than simply becoming the best self one can while avoiding community.
1. Crabb does a good cursory job of overviewing different approaches to Scripture in Biblical/Christian counseling. His position is more nuanced that I was expecting. He suggests that the Word of God is sufficient for biblical counseling but this does not mean Christians need to eschew or be suspicious of insights from modern psychology. Essentially, he suggests we ought to understand the Bible well, glean from psychology what seems compatible with the Scriptures, and then test it again with the Scriptures (especially the wisdom literature).
2. Crabb treats the personal, rational, volitional, and emotional sides of the person as important. Though I don't agree with all of his logic and his diagrams are confusing at times (I don't get how his circles work), he adequately treats these areas.
3. I just finished reading "On Being Truly Human" by Eberhard Jungel where, using Luther's distinction between act and personhood on the basis of justification by faith, concludes that to be truly human is to receive your justification from God so that you do not have to provide your own self-realization. This frees you to love. Crabb's conclusion about Christian maturity is strikingly close to this. He believes that the Christian receives his identity and wholeness from God, therefore he does not need to be self-defensive. Also, Christian maturity is expressed through love in community rather than simply becoming the best self one can while avoiding community.
August 5, 2020
While this book is for adults, both for understanding level and some of the mature content, It's amazing. I come away from all of Larry Crabb's books both equipped to better relate to others and better able to understand myself.
I highly recommend this for all adult Christians
Warning: there are several very frank mentions of certain sexual sins in this book. I wasn't super comfortable, but Crabb deals with it in such a biblical, god-honoring way that I wasn't offended by it.
I highly recommend this for all adult Christians
Warning: there are several very frank mentions of certain sexual sins in this book. I wasn't super comfortable, but Crabb deals with it in such a biblical, god-honoring way that I wasn't offended by it.
May 17, 2021
The book was good. I enjoyed a lot of its insights. The title and especially the subtitle, however, were somewhat misleading. I thought the book was primarily about our need for relationships when the book was in reality more of a prolegomenon on Christian counseling.
March 25, 2022
This book just changed my life. I don't say that lightly. But Larry Crabb has done it again. Book starts a little slow but I promise you want to read the end. His insights truly just blew up my life.
October 30, 2022
Wonderfully insightful book on counseling! Anyone who even meets up with people for coffee regularly in a ministry context would really enjoy this!
June 26, 2023
Introducere:
Cartea lui Larry Crabb, "Understanding People", explorează complexitatea relațiilor uma-ne și subliniază importanța înțelegerii nevoilor și provocărilor din interacțiunile noastre. Autorul susține că mulți oameni doresc relații autentice, dar întâmpină dificultăți în a le construi și menține. Prin perspectiva biblică, Crabb oferă sfaturi practice și exemple relevante pentru a dez-volta relații sănătoase, bazate pe empatie, comunicare autentică și vulnerabilitate. Cartea ne încurajează să experimentăm conexiuni autentice și să investim în construirea relațiilor semnifica-tive, transformându-ne viața și interacțiunile cu ceilalți.
Rezumat pe capitole:
Capitolul 1: În acest capitol, autorul subliniază importanța determinării adevărului și a ceea ce este corect în consilierea biblică. El evidențiază că modelele de consiliere ar trebui să se bazeze pe fundamentul revelației divine, nu doar pe o concordanță aparentă cu Scriptura.
Capitolul 2: Autorul explorează cele două tipuri de revelație - generală și specială - și subliniază importanța acordată Bibliei în găsirea adevărului și înțelegerii vieții. El avertizează împotriva ap-licării metodei "celor două cărți" în domeniul psihologiei și consilierii, deoarece poate duce la conflicte între concluziile biblice și cele psihologice.
Capitolul 3: Autorul examinează dacă Biblia vorbește semnificativ despre toate problemele uma-ne. El prezintă două răspunsuri opuse - unul care susține că Biblia nu este suficientă și că trebuie să căutăm în alte surse, și unul care afirmă că Biblia este suficientă și că găsim răspunsurile în ea. Autorul evidențiază pericolul de a trata problemele complexe într-un mod simplist și de a ignora motivațiile profunde ale oamenilor.
Capitolul 4: Autorul subliniază importanța înțelegerii că viața trebuie trăită conform unui model eficient bazat pe învățăturile biblice. El explorează întrebări și lupte comune cu care se confruntă oamenii și subliniază necesitatea de a trata problemele la nivelul inimii, nu doar al comportamen-tului. Autorul critică ipocrizia prezentă în anumite comunități creștine și subliniază importanța de a trăi în concordanță cu adevărul pe care îl propovăduim.
Capitolul 5: Acest capitol se întreabă cum pot oamenii să se schimbe cu adevărat. Autorul subli-niază trei întrebări-cheie: Cine suntem? De ce avem atât de multe probleme? Care sunt soluțiile? Capitolul explorează diferite modele de înțelegere a oamenilor și problemelor lor, inclusiv mode-lul dinamic, modelul moral și modelul relațional. Autorul evidențiază importanța de a înțelege corect natura umană pentru a găsi soluții eficiente. Modelele de consiliere reflectă de obicei pre-supuneri fundamentale ale unuia sau mai multor dintre aceste modele.
Capitolul 6: Autorul se concentrează pe imaginea lui Dumnezeu purtată de oameni și distorsiuni-le aduse de păcat. El subliniază două presupuneri despre semnificația imaginii lui Dumnezeu: că aceasta înseamnă că oamenii sunt creaturi deosebit de importante și că semnificația imaginii lui Dumnezeu este strâns legată de abilitățile și relațiile noastre. Capitolul explorează diverse viziuni asupra semnificației imaginii lui Dumnezeu și subliniază importanța de a recunoaște că fiecare persoană este valoroasă și demnă de respect.
Capitolul 7: Acest capitol se concentrează pe confruntarea cu problemele personale și pe contri-buția noastră la rezolvarea lor. Autorul subliniază importanța auto-reflecției și explorează concep-tele biblice de ființă interioară și sete a sufletului. El evidențiază faptul că oamenii pot căuta în mod greșit satisfacții în locurile greșite și că doar relația cu Dumnezeu poate aduce satisfacție și împlinire adevărată.
Capitolul 8: Autorul explorează tema suferinței umane și a problemelor legate de ea. El subliniază că suferința face parte din experiența umană și că abordarea ei necesită înțelegerea profunzimii și complexității ei. Capitolul examinează diferite abordări ale suferinței și evidențiază importanța de a oferi compasiune și sprijin celor care trec prin suferință.
Capitolul 9: Autorul discută despre nevoia de a avea relații sănătoase și semnificative cu ceilalți. El evidențiază importanța comunității și a relațiilor autentice în procesul de schimbare și creștere personală. Capitolul explorează provocările și blocajele care pot apărea în relațiile interpersonale și subliniază nevoia de a-i ierta și de a-i accepta pe ceilalți așa cum sunt.
Capitolul 10: Acest capitol se concentrează pe tema iertării și a vindecării relațiilor deteriorate. Autorul subliniază că iertarea nu înseamnă uitare sau minimizarea răului, ci eliberarea de povara resentimentelor și încurajarea reconcilierii. Capitolul explorează motivele pentru care iertarea este dificilă și oferă principii și strategii pentru a-i ajuta pe oameni să ierte și să repare relațiile.
Capitolul 11: Autorul discută despre tema identității și a valorii personale. El subliniază impor-tanța de a ne vedea pe noi înșine prin ochii lui Dumnezeu și de a accepta că suntem creații valo-roase și iubite de El. Capitolul explorează obstacolele și complexitățile legate de construirea unei identități sănătoase și oferă perspectiva biblică asupra valorii și scopului personal.
Capitolul 12: Acest capitol se concentrează pe tema dorinței și a satisfacției. Autorul subliniază că dorințele noastre pot fi bune și legitime, dar și coruptibile și distorsionate de păcat. Capitolul explorează modul în care dorințele noastre pot deveni o sursă de probleme și suferință și oferă principii biblice pentru a ne ghida dorințele într-o direcție sănătoasă și plină de sens.
Capitolul 13: Autorul încheie cartea cu un apel la aplicarea principiilor biblice în practica consilie-rii. El subliniază importanța de a integra învățăturile Scripturii cu înțelepciunea și învățăturile psihologiei, evitând atât extremismul biblicismului, cât și sincronizarea acritică cu psihologia se-culară. Autorul încurajează consilierii să fie conduși de Duhul Sfânt și să urmeze modelul lui Isus Cristos în slujirea lor.
Încheierea eseului:
Cartea explorează relațiile umane și nevoile noastre profunde în interacțiuni. Eu, unul, am găsit lucruri bune și și aspecte care ar putea fi mai bune.
Un aspect negativ al cărții ar fi că autorul nu oferă destule exemple concrete sau povestiri/ studii de caz, ca să înțelegem mai bine conceptele prezentate. Aș fi preferat să vad mai multe exemple din viața reală.
În ceea ce privește conținutul, cartea ne oferă o perspectivă biblică și subliniază impor-tanța înțelegerii noastre ca ființe umane și cum funcționează relațiile. Totodată are multe momente în care parcă autorul face consiliere 1 la 1 cu cititorul.
Top citate ce mi l-am notat:
• "True understanding begins with listening. It is in the silence of attentive listening that we create space for others to be truly known."
•
• "Our brokenness does not define us; it is an invitation to seek healing and restora-tion in the context of genuine relationships."
• "Authentic communication involves not just speaking our minds, but also opening our hearts and sharing our true selves with others."
• "Vulnerability is the gateway to deeper connections. It is in our willingness to be seen and known that we experience true intimacy."
• "The journey towards understanding others starts with embracing our own story and recognizing the common threads that connect us all."
• "True change happens when we shift our focus from fixing others to understan-ding and accepting them as they are."
Stilul de scriere al lui Larry Crabb e clar și ușor de înțeles, ceea ce face lectura plăcută și accesibilă. Reușesște să transmită idei complexe într-un mod simplu și captivant, fără să folo-sească un limbaj complicat sau termeni tehnici.
Cartea asta, deși poate părea generală uneori, e foarte utilă atât în viața personală, cât și în activitatea de consiliere. Ne ajută să înțelegem mai bine nevoile și dorințele noastre fundamentale și ne oferă instrumente practice ca să construim relații mai sănătoase, bazate pe înțelegere, comu-nicare sinceră și deschidere față de ceilalți.
Cartea lui Larry Crabb, "Understanding People", explorează complexitatea relațiilor uma-ne și subliniază importanța înțelegerii nevoilor și provocărilor din interacțiunile noastre. Autorul susține că mulți oameni doresc relații autentice, dar întâmpină dificultăți în a le construi și menține. Prin perspectiva biblică, Crabb oferă sfaturi practice și exemple relevante pentru a dez-volta relații sănătoase, bazate pe empatie, comunicare autentică și vulnerabilitate. Cartea ne încurajează să experimentăm conexiuni autentice și să investim în construirea relațiilor semnifica-tive, transformându-ne viața și interacțiunile cu ceilalți.
Rezumat pe capitole:
Capitolul 1: În acest capitol, autorul subliniază importanța determinării adevărului și a ceea ce este corect în consilierea biblică. El evidențiază că modelele de consiliere ar trebui să se bazeze pe fundamentul revelației divine, nu doar pe o concordanță aparentă cu Scriptura.
Capitolul 2: Autorul explorează cele două tipuri de revelație - generală și specială - și subliniază importanța acordată Bibliei în găsirea adevărului și înțelegerii vieții. El avertizează împotriva ap-licării metodei "celor două cărți" în domeniul psihologiei și consilierii, deoarece poate duce la conflicte între concluziile biblice și cele psihologice.
Capitolul 3: Autorul examinează dacă Biblia vorbește semnificativ despre toate problemele uma-ne. El prezintă două răspunsuri opuse - unul care susține că Biblia nu este suficientă și că trebuie să căutăm în alte surse, și unul care afirmă că Biblia este suficientă și că găsim răspunsurile în ea. Autorul evidențiază pericolul de a trata problemele complexe într-un mod simplist și de a ignora motivațiile profunde ale oamenilor.
Capitolul 4: Autorul subliniază importanța înțelegerii că viața trebuie trăită conform unui model eficient bazat pe învățăturile biblice. El explorează întrebări și lupte comune cu care se confruntă oamenii și subliniază necesitatea de a trata problemele la nivelul inimii, nu doar al comportamen-tului. Autorul critică ipocrizia prezentă în anumite comunități creștine și subliniază importanța de a trăi în concordanță cu adevărul pe care îl propovăduim.
Capitolul 5: Acest capitol se întreabă cum pot oamenii să se schimbe cu adevărat. Autorul subli-niază trei întrebări-cheie: Cine suntem? De ce avem atât de multe probleme? Care sunt soluțiile? Capitolul explorează diferite modele de înțelegere a oamenilor și problemelor lor, inclusiv mode-lul dinamic, modelul moral și modelul relațional. Autorul evidențiază importanța de a înțelege corect natura umană pentru a găsi soluții eficiente. Modelele de consiliere reflectă de obicei pre-supuneri fundamentale ale unuia sau mai multor dintre aceste modele.
Capitolul 6: Autorul se concentrează pe imaginea lui Dumnezeu purtată de oameni și distorsiuni-le aduse de păcat. El subliniază două presupuneri despre semnificația imaginii lui Dumnezeu: că aceasta înseamnă că oamenii sunt creaturi deosebit de importante și că semnificația imaginii lui Dumnezeu este strâns legată de abilitățile și relațiile noastre. Capitolul explorează diverse viziuni asupra semnificației imaginii lui Dumnezeu și subliniază importanța de a recunoaște că fiecare persoană este valoroasă și demnă de respect.
Capitolul 7: Acest capitol se concentrează pe confruntarea cu problemele personale și pe contri-buția noastră la rezolvarea lor. Autorul subliniază importanța auto-reflecției și explorează concep-tele biblice de ființă interioară și sete a sufletului. El evidențiază faptul că oamenii pot căuta în mod greșit satisfacții în locurile greșite și că doar relația cu Dumnezeu poate aduce satisfacție și împlinire adevărată.
Capitolul 8: Autorul explorează tema suferinței umane și a problemelor legate de ea. El subliniază că suferința face parte din experiența umană și că abordarea ei necesită înțelegerea profunzimii și complexității ei. Capitolul examinează diferite abordări ale suferinței și evidențiază importanța de a oferi compasiune și sprijin celor care trec prin suferință.
Capitolul 9: Autorul discută despre nevoia de a avea relații sănătoase și semnificative cu ceilalți. El evidențiază importanța comunității și a relațiilor autentice în procesul de schimbare și creștere personală. Capitolul explorează provocările și blocajele care pot apărea în relațiile interpersonale și subliniază nevoia de a-i ierta și de a-i accepta pe ceilalți așa cum sunt.
Capitolul 10: Acest capitol se concentrează pe tema iertării și a vindecării relațiilor deteriorate. Autorul subliniază că iertarea nu înseamnă uitare sau minimizarea răului, ci eliberarea de povara resentimentelor și încurajarea reconcilierii. Capitolul explorează motivele pentru care iertarea este dificilă și oferă principii și strategii pentru a-i ajuta pe oameni să ierte și să repare relațiile.
Capitolul 11: Autorul discută despre tema identității și a valorii personale. El subliniază impor-tanța de a ne vedea pe noi înșine prin ochii lui Dumnezeu și de a accepta că suntem creații valo-roase și iubite de El. Capitolul explorează obstacolele și complexitățile legate de construirea unei identități sănătoase și oferă perspectiva biblică asupra valorii și scopului personal.
Capitolul 12: Acest capitol se concentrează pe tema dorinței și a satisfacției. Autorul subliniază că dorințele noastre pot fi bune și legitime, dar și coruptibile și distorsionate de păcat. Capitolul explorează modul în care dorințele noastre pot deveni o sursă de probleme și suferință și oferă principii biblice pentru a ne ghida dorințele într-o direcție sănătoasă și plină de sens.
Capitolul 13: Autorul încheie cartea cu un apel la aplicarea principiilor biblice în practica consilie-rii. El subliniază importanța de a integra învățăturile Scripturii cu înțelepciunea și învățăturile psihologiei, evitând atât extremismul biblicismului, cât și sincronizarea acritică cu psihologia se-culară. Autorul încurajează consilierii să fie conduși de Duhul Sfânt și să urmeze modelul lui Isus Cristos în slujirea lor.
Încheierea eseului:
Cartea explorează relațiile umane și nevoile noastre profunde în interacțiuni. Eu, unul, am găsit lucruri bune și și aspecte care ar putea fi mai bune.
Un aspect negativ al cărții ar fi că autorul nu oferă destule exemple concrete sau povestiri/ studii de caz, ca să înțelegem mai bine conceptele prezentate. Aș fi preferat să vad mai multe exemple din viața reală.
În ceea ce privește conținutul, cartea ne oferă o perspectivă biblică și subliniază impor-tanța înțelegerii noastre ca ființe umane și cum funcționează relațiile. Totodată are multe momente în care parcă autorul face consiliere 1 la 1 cu cititorul.
Top citate ce mi l-am notat:
• "True understanding begins with listening. It is in the silence of attentive listening that we create space for others to be truly known."
•
• "Our brokenness does not define us; it is an invitation to seek healing and restora-tion in the context of genuine relationships."
• "Authentic communication involves not just speaking our minds, but also opening our hearts and sharing our true selves with others."
• "Vulnerability is the gateway to deeper connections. It is in our willingness to be seen and known that we experience true intimacy."
• "The journey towards understanding others starts with embracing our own story and recognizing the common threads that connect us all."
• "True change happens when we shift our focus from fixing others to understan-ding and accepting them as they are."
Stilul de scriere al lui Larry Crabb e clar și ușor de înțeles, ceea ce face lectura plăcută și accesibilă. Reușesște să transmită idei complexe într-un mod simplu și captivant, fără să folo-sească un limbaj complicat sau termeni tehnici.
Cartea asta, deși poate părea generală uneori, e foarte utilă atât în viața personală, cât și în activitatea de consiliere. Ne ajută să înțelegem mai bine nevoile și dorințele noastre fundamentale și ne oferă instrumente practice ca să construim relații mai sănătoase, bazate pe înțelegere, comu-nicare sinceră și deschidere față de ceilalți.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 2, 2021
In “Understanding People,” Larry Crabb lays out his philosophy of counseling. For Crabb, the central question for the Christian counselor is what is the relationship between the Bible and counseling. Crabb believes that most counselors have fallen off the ends of the spectrum too far in either direction: they’ve either diminished the authority and perspicuity of scripture (accomodationism) or they’ve devalued the contribution of psychology in helping us understanding people (exclusivist).
Crabb urges us that “true theology, in its very nature, is intensely practical… Divine truth is always intellectually acceptable, spiritually enriching, and practically relevant. If it is true, it has personal impact.” Crabb asks the question: as Christian counselors, is our counseling to be “guided by” or “consistent with” the Bible. The difference between the two is enormous.
To take the “consistent” view, many Christian therapists adopt models as long as they do not violate “clear biblical teaching about doctrine or ethics.” Such a path is too accommodating, Crabb argues, and does not give the Bible enough credit for God’s purposes. It lacks confidence that the Bible speaks authoritatively to many areas of our lives.
Those who take the “exclusive” view, on the other hand, believe that the Bible “directly answers every legitimate question about life and is therefore a sufficient guide for counseling.” The concern with this posture, for Crabb, is that the biblical Word that counselors apply to their counselees is often shallow and leans toward legalism.
Crabb suggests a third way. Crabb argues that “the Bible teaches categories of understanding that can comprehensively guide our efforts to counsel with warmth and insight, and it lays out truths about human personality that are sufficient for leading us into a thorough understanding of what therapists call ‘dynamics.’” This way agrees with those who have a consistent view that therapy gives us tools to deal with internal dynamics. A biblical counselor looks to the heart, which is the source for all of our responses and decisions. Crabb says that a biblical counselor sees relationships as a critical challenge for every human being. “And the Bible is a sufficient guide. It is a textbook for relational living.”
Crabb says that, broadly speaking, three models guide the counselor. The first type is the Dynamic Model, wherein “people are controlled by internal processes (often called personality dynamics) of which they are usually unaware.” The second type is the Moral Model, which believes that “people are more stubborn than confused.” The final model is the Relational Model. In this model, “emotional distress is not caused by deep dynamic processes that must be exposed, nor can the person’s pattern of irresponsible choices be blamed for all his problems. The central area of concern is unsatisfying relationships.” Crabb continues, “Human problems, in this view, are best understood as defensive attempts to handle the pain of fear and tension in significant relationships.” He concludes, “People are caught up in a vicious cycle of hurt, defensive retreat, more hurt, more retreat.”
Crabb pulls back and considers the validity of all three models. To do so, Crabb considers what it means that we are made in God’s image. He suggests that some of those similarities are our deep longings, our evaluative thinking, our active choosing, and our emotional experiencing. At our core, “we are dependent beings whose life requires union with God.” Crabb argues that, “Biblical counseling involves an uncovering of what has been deeply hidden for the purpose of promoting the simple but profound awareness that we need God; we need his forgiveness, his power, his life.”
God wants us to acknowledge that we are desiring beings, and that that desire comes from him and is only perfectly fulfilled in him. “We are thirsty people,” Crabb says. “We long for relationship and impact, desires that only God can fully satisfy.”
It is from this Augustinian perspective on our relationship with sin that Crabb urges us to consider the human heart. “The human heart is now a reservoir of unconscious disordered motivation and response, of which unrenewed persons are unaware if left to themselves, for ‘the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately corrupt; who can understand it?’ (Jer 17:9).” Crabb says this means that “Sin is more than wrong behavior.” We have to “look carefully at the beliefs and motives beneath the acts.” A counselor helps someone understand how they are formulating their beliefs and where they are seeking their fulfillment.
It is here that Biblical counselors align with those from the Dynamic Model, although they do so with a different perspective. Biblical counselors believe that the behaviors, beliefs, and emotions that are conscious to those they walk with are the tip of the iceberg of the heart. We are unaware of other beliefs, images, and pain that propel our hearts.
The biblical counselor helps the counselee walk through the process of repentance. Repentance allows us to surgically remove even “sin hidden from view” “like a tumor.” This sin runs deep. Human beings long for control. We doggedly protect ourselves from others. It takes deep trust in God to allow him to reach into our hearts and walk through change.
Crabb encourages us to lean into the awareness of our emotions. Even negative emotions can provide opportunities for us to move toward God, while positive emotions can draw us away from God. Crabb is a master of charts and his flow charts of how we navigate positive and negative emotions are both excellent. Crabb’s advice is that we fully experience and feel our emotions, using them to “evaluate what they reveal about” our beliefs and purposes. However, he cautions us that while we ought to be free “to express every emotion,” we ought to “limit expression by the purposes of love.”
Crabb concludes the book with a consideration of the fact that counseling ought to serve the purpose of growing us in spiritual maturity. “The richest opportunities for character growth will never occur without experiencing the terrible reality of total dependency.”
“Understanding People” is one of the best books I’ve read on biblical counseling, only surpassed by “How People Change,” “Seeing through New Eyes,” and “When People are Big and God is Small.” Crabb is a wise and engaging guide. At times Crabb’s style and organization get in the way of the clarity of his writing, but anyone who is interested in biblical counseling needs to pick up Crabb’s book.
One final comment: I read the 2013 Zondervan paperback reprint of this book and was very disappointed with the quality (it is the same edition that Crabb’s book “Encouragement” is in). The paper and the binding were the cheapest possible quality. If you’re able to buy another edition of this book I would encourage you to do so.
For more reviews see www.thebeehive.live.
Crabb urges us that “true theology, in its very nature, is intensely practical… Divine truth is always intellectually acceptable, spiritually enriching, and practically relevant. If it is true, it has personal impact.” Crabb asks the question: as Christian counselors, is our counseling to be “guided by” or “consistent with” the Bible. The difference between the two is enormous.
To take the “consistent” view, many Christian therapists adopt models as long as they do not violate “clear biblical teaching about doctrine or ethics.” Such a path is too accommodating, Crabb argues, and does not give the Bible enough credit for God’s purposes. It lacks confidence that the Bible speaks authoritatively to many areas of our lives.
Those who take the “exclusive” view, on the other hand, believe that the Bible “directly answers every legitimate question about life and is therefore a sufficient guide for counseling.” The concern with this posture, for Crabb, is that the biblical Word that counselors apply to their counselees is often shallow and leans toward legalism.
Crabb suggests a third way. Crabb argues that “the Bible teaches categories of understanding that can comprehensively guide our efforts to counsel with warmth and insight, and it lays out truths about human personality that are sufficient for leading us into a thorough understanding of what therapists call ‘dynamics.’” This way agrees with those who have a consistent view that therapy gives us tools to deal with internal dynamics. A biblical counselor looks to the heart, which is the source for all of our responses and decisions. Crabb says that a biblical counselor sees relationships as a critical challenge for every human being. “And the Bible is a sufficient guide. It is a textbook for relational living.”
Crabb says that, broadly speaking, three models guide the counselor. The first type is the Dynamic Model, wherein “people are controlled by internal processes (often called personality dynamics) of which they are usually unaware.” The second type is the Moral Model, which believes that “people are more stubborn than confused.” The final model is the Relational Model. In this model, “emotional distress is not caused by deep dynamic processes that must be exposed, nor can the person’s pattern of irresponsible choices be blamed for all his problems. The central area of concern is unsatisfying relationships.” Crabb continues, “Human problems, in this view, are best understood as defensive attempts to handle the pain of fear and tension in significant relationships.” He concludes, “People are caught up in a vicious cycle of hurt, defensive retreat, more hurt, more retreat.”
Crabb pulls back and considers the validity of all three models. To do so, Crabb considers what it means that we are made in God’s image. He suggests that some of those similarities are our deep longings, our evaluative thinking, our active choosing, and our emotional experiencing. At our core, “we are dependent beings whose life requires union with God.” Crabb argues that, “Biblical counseling involves an uncovering of what has been deeply hidden for the purpose of promoting the simple but profound awareness that we need God; we need his forgiveness, his power, his life.”
God wants us to acknowledge that we are desiring beings, and that that desire comes from him and is only perfectly fulfilled in him. “We are thirsty people,” Crabb says. “We long for relationship and impact, desires that only God can fully satisfy.”
It is from this Augustinian perspective on our relationship with sin that Crabb urges us to consider the human heart. “The human heart is now a reservoir of unconscious disordered motivation and response, of which unrenewed persons are unaware if left to themselves, for ‘the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately corrupt; who can understand it?’ (Jer 17:9).” Crabb says this means that “Sin is more than wrong behavior.” We have to “look carefully at the beliefs and motives beneath the acts.” A counselor helps someone understand how they are formulating their beliefs and where they are seeking their fulfillment.
It is here that Biblical counselors align with those from the Dynamic Model, although they do so with a different perspective. Biblical counselors believe that the behaviors, beliefs, and emotions that are conscious to those they walk with are the tip of the iceberg of the heart. We are unaware of other beliefs, images, and pain that propel our hearts.
The biblical counselor helps the counselee walk through the process of repentance. Repentance allows us to surgically remove even “sin hidden from view” “like a tumor.” This sin runs deep. Human beings long for control. We doggedly protect ourselves from others. It takes deep trust in God to allow him to reach into our hearts and walk through change.
Crabb encourages us to lean into the awareness of our emotions. Even negative emotions can provide opportunities for us to move toward God, while positive emotions can draw us away from God. Crabb is a master of charts and his flow charts of how we navigate positive and negative emotions are both excellent. Crabb’s advice is that we fully experience and feel our emotions, using them to “evaluate what they reveal about” our beliefs and purposes. However, he cautions us that while we ought to be free “to express every emotion,” we ought to “limit expression by the purposes of love.”
Crabb concludes the book with a consideration of the fact that counseling ought to serve the purpose of growing us in spiritual maturity. “The richest opportunities for character growth will never occur without experiencing the terrible reality of total dependency.”
“Understanding People” is one of the best books I’ve read on biblical counseling, only surpassed by “How People Change,” “Seeing through New Eyes,” and “When People are Big and God is Small.” Crabb is a wise and engaging guide. At times Crabb’s style and organization get in the way of the clarity of his writing, but anyone who is interested in biblical counseling needs to pick up Crabb’s book.
One final comment: I read the 2013 Zondervan paperback reprint of this book and was very disappointed with the quality (it is the same edition that Crabb’s book “Encouragement” is in). The paper and the binding were the cheapest possible quality. If you’re able to buy another edition of this book I would encourage you to do so.
For more reviews see www.thebeehive.live.
March 20, 2021
- Wow! The ending was very convicting --and I appreciated how each part of the book built up to the end.
- I loved his holistic emphasis, combining cognitive, behavioral, psychotherapeutic approaches.
- I definitely connected with what he said about emotions are good, that hurt is part of life, and we should feel deeply. His discussion about "negative" emotions answered some questions that I've been asking for over a decade.
- HOWEVER, I would have appreciated more foundation for his premise that all our problems stem back to relationships. He did say that people have longings for impact (in addition to relationship), but then he didn't spend much time discussing the effects of our longings for impact. I definitely see how relationship longings affect a lot of our problems. I just need some more information to convince me that it is the basis for ALL of our problems.
- I loved his holistic emphasis, combining cognitive, behavioral, psychotherapeutic approaches.
- I definitely connected with what he said about emotions are good, that hurt is part of life, and we should feel deeply. His discussion about "negative" emotions answered some questions that I've been asking for over a decade.
- HOWEVER, I would have appreciated more foundation for his premise that all our problems stem back to relationships. He did say that people have longings for impact (in addition to relationship), but then he didn't spend much time discussing the effects of our longings for impact. I definitely see how relationship longings affect a lot of our problems. I just need some more information to convince me that it is the basis for ALL of our problems.
January 8, 2021
I love Larry Crabb.
He has a wonderful way of describing human nature, and the motives and urges that dictate our actions.
This book begins with a helpful discussion about christian counselling, how christians do not tend to approach Psychology properly, and how we should approach it.
He goes on to present a very insightful picture of human beings in relation to God, how our brokenness affects us and how we can experience true healing through relationship.
I would highly recommend this to anyone who is interested in Christian counselling, pastoral ministry or is just interested in understanding themselves and the people around them better.
He has a wonderful way of describing human nature, and the motives and urges that dictate our actions.
This book begins with a helpful discussion about christian counselling, how christians do not tend to approach Psychology properly, and how we should approach it.
He goes on to present a very insightful picture of human beings in relation to God, how our brokenness affects us and how we can experience true healing through relationship.
I would highly recommend this to anyone who is interested in Christian counselling, pastoral ministry or is just interested in understanding themselves and the people around them better.
July 31, 2013
This book was great. I would highly recommend it to someone who wants to learn more about themselves and others from a biblically based perspective. It was very thought provoking and challenged me to reassess myself not in fear but in boldness...and ultimately encouraged me to maintain a strong and intensely needed relationship with God and my savior Jesus. To measure the legitimacy of spiritual books, since it led me back to the Bible and to God with more passion than before, I consider this one a success.
October 22, 2018
Longings, Rational, and Sinful Agency
People are complex. The physical, spiritual, and emotional are all tangled like an old box of electrical cords. Crabb's approach is what I was taught in college. This book offers an overview of that. To Crabb, many counseling approaches only deal with issues above the water line of an ice berg, but for lasting change to occurs we must deal below the water line with frustrated longings and sinful rational.
People are complex. The physical, spiritual, and emotional are all tangled like an old box of electrical cords. Crabb's approach is what I was taught in college. This book offers an overview of that. To Crabb, many counseling approaches only deal with issues above the water line of an ice berg, but for lasting change to occurs we must deal below the water line with frustrated longings and sinful rational.
July 27, 2011
It's been so good to observe Crabb's progress at melding clinical psychology and Biblical counseling. As we post-moderns are discarding authoritarianism and searching for the Truth in all its facets, Crabb has been growing in wisdom and facility to communicate.
This book is outdated in comparison to his most recent work.
This book is outdated in comparison to his most recent work.
October 6, 2018
This was a very helpful book. It was not what I first thought but I kept reading. It is definitely a counseling book for counselors to better know how to counsel. It gave me many insights into myself and others biblically. I appreciate Larry Crabbs passion to see others understand and grasp the need for biblical counseling.
October 4, 2022
I enjoyed reading Larry Crabb's book. It is very helpful to (like the title gives away) understand people and their needs better. It's definitely not only meant for people who plan to become counselors. The book contains solid advice for our everyday interactions with friends, family, co-workers etc. It also calls us to take a closer look at ourselves.
May 28, 2024
Should be required reading for any Christian in counseling or spiritual direction. But it is a powerful book for any believer who wants greater insight into themselves and into others. Reading this book will help you connect with other people on deeper and more meaningful levels and honor God in those relationships.
May 7, 2014
Tediously plodding before becoming thoughtfully nuanced, though not entirely convincing for this reader. The last sections of the book are worth thinking through, but I guess I was disappointed in hearing less of Jesus than I was expecting. Which made me sad.
March 3, 2022
Overall a pretty incredible book. The only reason I give it 4 stars is because I didn't find his various circle illustrations particularly helpful. They just don't add much to the content of the book, which is already robust. Those particular illustrations could have been left out, I think.
March 20, 2024
Larry Crabb understand people well
Larry corrected two mistakes people trying to grow maturity. The first is obedience without brokenness. The second is brokenness without obedience. We are to obey in the context of brokenness.
Larry corrected two mistakes people trying to grow maturity. The first is obedience without brokenness. The second is brokenness without obedience. We are to obey in the context of brokenness.
October 21, 2015
Arc words: Be self-sufficient, or depend on God. Psychology has some useful concepts to show the deceptions of the human heart. The book overlaps with, but does not surpass, The Marriage Builder.
June 7, 2019
Read through this one a few times. An excellent springboard into the integrationist perspective of counselling.
January 2, 2019
4.5 stars
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