Truly, Darkly, Deeply

by Victoria Selman

A taut, breakout psychological thriller with a wicked twist.

Matty Melgren is a convicted serial killer serving life without parole for the murders of several women in London in the 1980s. He has consistently protested his innocence, and the evidence against him was largely circumstantial. At the time of his arrest, Matty’s girlfriend was Amelia-Rose, a single mother to 12-year-old Sophie. Sophie adores Matty. He’s handsome, funny, respectable—she could never suspect him of the brutal killings in the headlines. Then a police sketch of a suspect is released that looks a lot like Matty. Was it him? Sophie is consumed with doubt and guilt, causing her to act impulsively, ripping her family apart. Years later, she is still haunted by her actions. Was she wrong to have done what she did all those years ago? Then Sophie receives a letter from Matty—he’s dying and asks her to visit him in prison. Will she finally get the answers she needs to be able to reclaim her future?

Already a bestseller in the UK, this twisty, true crime-inspired mystery thriller is perfect for fans of page-turning crime books like The Last Thing He Told Me or Before I Go to Sleep , or readers of serial killer books about Ted Bundy and other infamous murderers.
 

Genres: Thriller, Mystery, Fiction, Crime, Mystery Thriller, Psychological Thriller, Audiobook

304 pages, Paperback

First published July 7, 2022

About the author

After graduating from Oxford University, Victoria Selman studied Creative Writing at the City Lit and wrote for the Ham & High and Daily Express newspapers.

In 2013 she won the Full Stop Short Story Prize and her first novel, Blood for Blood, was shortlisted for the 2017 Debut Dagger Award.

Victoria lives in London with her husband and two sons.

Reviews

[Baba · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sophie has been getting support from her sponsor as she prepares to visit her one time father figure in prison, for the first time. Why has the enigmatic 'Matty' been in prison for the last two decades. He's a convicted serial killer, but has always claimed that he was innocent. Duh duh duh!

Narrated by Sophie across two timelines: then, when she was 12 and her mum was dating Matty; and now in her 30's, preparing to confront Matty in prison, this is a London set soap opera that descends into secrets, lies and murders over two years of North London being under siege by a vicious serial killer of young curly haired brunettes(!). Mostly told from the viewpoint of the 12 year old Sophie in 1980s London, this is surprisingly (for me) a pretty compelling read that got more and more fraught and intense the deeper I got into it. What tears Sophie apart is Matty's prominence in her childhood and the two decades of niggling feeling that as he has always claimed, that he might actually be innocent! Top marks to Selman for telling a story of the 'other victims' of serial killers, their own families! Yet another very well chosen UK Richard and Judy Book Club read. An easy 8 out of 12, Four Stars from me.

2023 read

[Misty Marie Harms · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book explores what it would be like to have a stepfather as a vicious serial killer. Would you see the signs? Would there be clues? Could you overlook it for the sake of having a father figure in your life? We explore that and more as we dive deeper into Sophie's past. Her remorse for the victims and the guilt she is left with. Adult Sophie got on my last nerve. All the back and forth about if the stepdad was guilty made me want to smack her one. Other than that, it was an okay read.

[Kaceey · Rating 3 out of 5]

“You can’t handle the truth” ~A Few Good Men.

Sophie and her mom cross the pond from Massachusetts to London. Just the two of them, leaving everyone and everything far behind. Then a gentleman named Matty waltzes into their lives. Sophie’s mom desperately hopes he’ll propose to her. Sophie herself is also fond of Marty. He’s the father figure she never had.

Not so fast ladies…there’s a darker side to Matty.

Matty is currently sitting in prison convicted of multiple murders. Is he truly guilty? Do they have the wrong man? Now 20 years later he reaches out to Sophie. He has a few things he needs to get off his chest. Only Sophie isn’t sure she’s ready to hear it!

This was a very slow-burn of a mystery, with 90% of the book as backstory. With the title, book cover and premise I was expecting a bit more. The blurb promises a ‘wicked twist.’ Umm no. My reaction was a bit more of “oh alright, well that’s a bit random”. Wish I could say I loved it, but it fell into a midrange average read.

3.5🌟

On the plus side I love the cover!🤩

Thank you to NetGalley and Union Square & Co.

[Ceecee · Rating 4 out of 5]

4+

A letter from Battlemouth prison lands with a thump on Sophie Brennans doormat, it’s where Matthew (Matty)Melgren has been for over 20 years. Matty was the partner of Amelia-Rose, Sophie‘s mother and he is the closest thing Sophie ever had to a father. Mattie was found guilty of multiple murders yet he is a killer with no stereotype, he seems so ‘normal’, handsome, well educated, well dressed. The news the letter contains is that Matty is dying and hasn’t long left and he wants to meet Sophie. Matty has haunted Sophie‘s dreams for years, can she confront him and lay the ghost of guilt to rest?

I really enjoyed the direction this novel takes as we view events through young and adult Sophie‘s eyes. It questions and weighs up the possibilities of innocence and guilt in several ways and this is reinforced through blogs that are interspersed throughout the narrative and also demonstrate the fascination some people have for serial killers. It looks closely at the scars and damage that are left behind by those convicted of serious crimes. The novel is well written and compelling especially the characterisation particularly of enigmatic Amelia-Rose and mesmerising Matty and you certainly feel Sophie’s angst. The feelings she has are palpable and the guilt she carries feels almost like a living thing, which I guess it is as it’s lived with her for years. Matty’s portrait dangles the is he, isn’t he conundrum in front of you and you speculate just as people did at the time of the killings in the early 1980s.

Contextually it’s very good too and you feel the paralysing fear that grips North London. I really like the way the author drip feeds little bombs of information and one or two are real jaw thunkers. The ending is a surprise but it most certainly works and helps to explain to some things you puzzle over.

Overall, it’s a very well written and well paced mystery thriller which is hard to put down. I’ve read books before by Victoria Selman but this is the one I’ve enjoyed the most.

With thanks to NetGalley and especially to Quercus Books for the much appreciated arc in return for an honest review.

[Danielle-Gemma💜 · Rating 2 out of 5]

Mmmmmmmmmmm

I kinda hate books like this because I never know how to rate them. I didn’t hate it and I didn’t love it so very middle of the road.

I will admit the twist at the end did surprise me (although I feel a little naive for not seeing it!!!!!) but other than that it just felt a big like it was dragging on. I kept reading because I wanted to know the outcome and if he was really guilty but I feel that the book could have been half the length and still achieved the same thing!!!

[Dee · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars rounded down. Another one where I struggled to connect with the unlikeable & often frustrating MC, but I did think this was a bit of a different take on serial killers, focusing on the family some of them fool & gas-light. I also found myself looking up BTK and the others M.O.'s mentioned just so I would recognize their evil when it was employed. It took a long, rather repetitive and circuitous path to get to the pay-off and the “twist” was maybe there all along, but I was really engaged by the interesting ending.

[Mandy White (mandylovestoread) · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I saw the synopsis for Truly, Darkly, Deeply, I just had to read it. A serial killer in North London in the 1980's.... just my kind of book. The night I picked it up, I realised that I was 200 pages in before I knew it. It is compelling and engrossing and I finished it the next day. You have got to add this book to your TBR's.

This was a different take on a serial killer story. It is told through the eyes of Sophie , who is just 8 years old when she moves to London from Boston with her mother, Amelia-Rose. The book begins with Sophie receiving a letter from Battlemouth Prison. She feels sick but at the same time needs to know what Matty wants. 20 years ago he was a massive part of her life, as her mother's boyfriend and the closest thing that she has ever had as a father. She loved him and he her. But then he was sent down for multiple murder - he was the Shadow.

Now Matty is dying and wants to see her. Will she get the answers she so needs? Will she go see him?

We then jump back and learn about how he came into their lives. How much Sophie and her mother loved him. How fear gripped North London with the murder of these women. How did they not see what he really was? How much he broke their hearts.

I loved that this was set back in a time before mobile phone and internet. The news came from the radio and the newspapers. The music and the fashion of the 80's was fabulous!!

Absolutely loved this and the ending was just perfect. You have to read it, trust me.

Thanks to Hachette Australia for my advanced copy of this book to read. Published in Australia July 12th.

[Kayla Hewett · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this one! It kept my attention and I did not predict the ending at all. It was a little repetitive at times but overall I thought it was great!

[Brandon Baker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Soooo good

This was a dark, twisty, and bingeable read about a woman that is still coming to terms with the fact that the man who she thought of as a father is a notorious serial killer that’s been haunting the area for years. We read from the MC’s POV as a girl as she lives through the killings, and as an adult where she’s grappling with the truth.

I can’t help but wonder if I didn’t read Good Me Bad Me by Ali Land recently I probably would have loved this a lot more, but as it was they were just too similar stories, and I feel like the former hit harder/was more terrifying than this, but this was still a really impactful read that surprised me a few times!!

[Suzanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to Hachette Australia for sending me a copy of this book for review.

Being a true crime fan , I loved how this book talked about serial killers. It made me think of Ted Bundy as soon as I heard Matty worked in a crisis centre.

It was brilliantly written in the fact even though I predicted the twist halfway through her writing kept me engaged and turning the pages.

It was different in that it was written from the childs point of view and not the parents, I felt that this made the book more interesting. The timeline was from 1980 to present day.

Highly recommend this book and look forward to reading more of her books.

[Dona's Books · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to author Victoria Selman, publishers Union Square and Co. and Sterling Publishing Co., and Edelweiss, for an advance digital copy of TRULY DARKLY DEEPLY.

It's the early 80s and Sophie and her mother, Amelia-Rose, have just moved to London, when they meet Matt. Oh, he insists on being called, "Matty." Because forced casualness and intimacy is never a red flag. And the two recent ex-pats proceed to fall right in love with the handsome, superficially charming dude. Soon, women in the area and within driving distance start turning up with an uncanny resemblance to Amelia-Rose, and oh yeah, dead. But Amelie-Rose isn't worried because Matty can explain each of his absences around the times of the murders. And Sophie says nothing about her doubts because-- well, old Matty's systematic abuse of her and her family has her solidly in his control. She is a button under his thumb. His survival depends on it.

I love this technique Selman uses: focus the narrative on the experiences of people "related" to violent crime. I mean by this, people who are connected to violent crimes through their relatives: either family of violent people or family of victims. Both perspectives require an extra level of empathy. This isn't just some over-permissive nameless twenty something in a leather jacket, but family. We relate to that. It's a really fresh approach to the "fictionalized true crime" trope.

I think Selman spins the narrative out a little longer than is necessary, and the denouement runs particularly long.

Rating: 🔪🔪🔪🔪 / 5 serial killers
Recommend? Yes!
Finished: February 28 2023
Read this if you like:
🗣 Stories about toxic relationships
👩‍🎓 Coming of age
⚰️ Murder mystery
👮‍♂️ True crime

[Mike · Rating 3 out of 5]

Victoria Selman’s Truly, Darkly, Deeply is an interesting use of the serial killer motif. A letter from Battlemouth Prison informs Sophie that Matty Melgren is dying and wants to see her. Sophie and her mother moved from Boston to London in the 1980s and Matty became part of their family and father figure for Sophie. A serial killer is at work in the north of London and twelve year old Sophie is fixated. The narrative is unusual in its interspersion of events today and of the 1980s, as well as blog posts and newspaper articles. The nub of the tale is the family relationship, Sophie’s psychologist and the man living downstairs. So, will Sophie finally get answers after twenty years and who was really responsible for all those women’s murders? A domestic noir psychological thriller that was somewhat mundane, lacking tension and only a three star read rating. With thanks to Quercus Books and the author, for an uncorrected advanced reader copy for review purposes. As always, the opinions herein are totally my own and freely given.

[Jannelies (living between hope and fear) · Rating 4 out of 5]

For a young child, not having a father can be terrible in more than one way. Missing a father figure is one, being bullied in school because other children seem to think there is something wrong with you is two. Sophie is glad to move from the US to the UK with her mother and make a fresh start. We’re talking the seventies here when divorce was still a scandal. And Amelia-Rose, Sophie’s mother, is not even divorced. Sophie’s father just left them.
Sophie tries to adapt to her new life but it isn’t easy. There are many cultural differences between the US and the UK, including the spelling so Sophie has a hard time at school. Luckily, there is Matty, her mothers’ new boyfriend. He becomes the father Sophie never had and she realizes now how she missed a father.
It will take twenty years after Matty’s arrest and conviction before Sophie finally learns the truth. Not only about Amelia-Rose and Matty, but partly also about herself.
Although the story sometimes moves a little too slow for my taste, it was very difficult not to keep reading. The characters are very well drawn out and the writing style is very engaging. I could picture Sophie, trying to fit in a community that essentially is completely different from where she grew up, except for the language. I could picture Amelia-Rose, struggling with many secrets – although we only later learn how many secrets exactly. And I could even picture Matty, the man with many faces.
I would love to read more books by Victoria Selman and I can highly recommend this book.

Thanks to Quercus Books and Netgalley for this review copy.

[Indieflower · Rating 3 out of 5]

Eight year old Sophie and her mother move from Massachusetts to London, far from family and friends, where just as her mum meets a new boyfriend, a serial killer begins terrorizing the city. This is a difficult one to rate, it's extremely compelling yet too drawn out, I don't mind slow burns but the pacing is off. Told by Sophie and set in two timelines, the 80s and some 20 years later, it was sometimes unclear which Sophie was speaking, date headers would have helped. I didn't really get the feel of the 80s either, details were there - songs, TV shows, fashions etc - but they felt a bit forced. So much of the story consisted of Sophie endlessly agonizing over the same thing, the repetition became a little too much. However, I was really intrigued by the story, it kept me turning the pages, eager to find out the truth, the ending was unexpected and cleared up a few details I'd been scratching my head about. Thanks to Netgalley, the author and publishers for the ARC.

[Janelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

A creepy, dark and compelling serial killer story told by Sophie, who moved to London with her mother as a young girl where they meet Matty Melgren. Matty is now serving a life sentence for a series of murders of mostly young women who resemble Sophie’s mum, Amelia. Sophie is still coming to terms with her childhood where she loved this man like a father. This book was so hard to put down, I was tempted to stay up late last night to finish it! I didn’t expect the ending, I thought I’d guessed where it was going, still after reading it there after definite hints throughout. An excellent thriller read.

[Kristine · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars rounded up.
I am fascinated by true crime and this was a great functionalization of it.
I truly enjoyed the ride - I was as taken by the topic as by the speculations and 'coming to terms' with the 'resolution' (I am trying to be as vague as possible in order not to add any spoilers to this review).
The writing was great, enthralling, and I was truly taken by the story and devoured this book in two sittings, forgetting most of the chores needed to be done over the weekend. That says something! :)

This was my first book from the author, but I will be surely looking for more of her books!

Thank you, NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review

[Liz Barnsley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely DEVOURED this brilliant serial killer thriller with added heart, it was wildly entertaining and brilliantly done

Exploring the "how could they not have KNOWN" aspect of murder, one family struggles with the fact that the man they loved was in fact a serial killer who had preyed on young women for years.

Or was he?

The answers will come and along the way the story is compelling, emotive and hugely intriguing. Bravo.

Definitely recommended.

[Kurryreads (Kerry) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNUx4esA/

Top 24 of 2024: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2gBTSQh/

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a different take on the usual, serial killer, novel. It is told from the point of view of Sophie, a young girl, whose mother moves them from the US to London in the early 1980's. Once there, Sophie has all the usual struggles of fitting in at school and making friends. However, life improves once Sophie's mother meets Matty Melgren. He not only loves her mother, but befriends Sophie. He brings her favourite ice cream, tells stories, plays games and makes her feel special.

Then, young women in the area of North London (an area I know well, which made the novel more interesting for me) start being killed. They all look a little like Sophie's mother, making her worry that she might be the next victim. Then, as time passes, Sophie begins to worry that it is Matty who is the killer. Years later, Matty, now in prison for the murders, wants to meet and the novel builds up to her visiting him, now dying of pancreatic cancer, in prison, where there is a final twist to the story.

This is a very interesting novel. Sophie is a great character. She is alternately full of rage, jealousy and fear; still a child but interested in the adult world. She loves her mother and she loves Matty. She doesn't want him to be guilty and feels immense guilt, and distress, for what happened, both to the victims and to how those events affected her life. I think this would be an excellent choice for book groups as there is so much to discuss. I received a copy of the book from the publishers, via NetGalley, for review.

[Ken · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Richard and Judy's bookclub picks that introduced me to a new author and another excellent read.
This standalone psychological thriller was a perfect introduction to Victoria Selman.

The story centres around a serial killer in the early 80's and told through the eyes of 12 year old Sophie.

I loved the setting of this novel. The time period gave me a real sense of nostalgia, especially references to TV shows and movies of the time.

Sophie had recently moved to London with her mother Amelia-Rose from Massachusetts.
The author gives a real sense of the cultural shift the young girl experiences, as she's used to the American spellings and finds it initially hard to adjust.

Once her mum meets the charismatic Matty, young Sophie has a father figure in her life.
But a spate of identical killings around London makes the young girl wonder if Matty is all what he seems...

Whilst the mystery surrounding Matty's potential guilt is strong, it's the impact on those around him that makes this such a compelling read.

[Ildiko Szendrei · Rating 3 out of 5]

Un thriller în care parcă am simțit deznodământul de la bun început. Matthew, un bărbat misterios, începe o relație cu Amelia. Aceasta are o fiică, pe Sophie, în vârstă de 6 ani, cea care acum are 30 de ani și ne spune toată povestea. Relația celor doi este ciudată, uneori Matt dispare și nimeni nu știe nimic de el zile bune, nu dă niciun semn. Apoi revine ca și când nimic nu s-ar fi întâmplat.

Simultan, se înmulțesc crimele. Femei tinere, care seamănă mult cu Amelia, încep să fie ucise. Chiar și câteva copile cad victime aceluiași criminal. Cine este el și de ce este Matthew atât de fascinat de abilitatea criminalului de a scăpa basma curată?

Atenție! Conține scene de violență împotriva copiilor, dar și unele scene complet nepotrivite între Matt și Sophie.

[Caroline Mitchell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Truly, Darkly, Deeply is a serial killer thriller and as deliciously dark as they come. There are so many twists and turns, each one expertly written as the story unfolds over twenty years. I enjoyed the change of timelines and the relationships between the characters as we try to ascertain Matty's guilt. This has all the elements of a best selling thriller when it releases in July. I was fortunate enough to receive an ARC of this book.

[Peggy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one very happy reader. A story that incorporates true crime and a serial killer. Creepy, intense, dark and chilling. The story of a serial killer and his life. Meeting Amelia Rose and her daughter Sophie. When it began Sophie was twelve years old and both Sophie and her mother have no idea how much their lives would change after meeting the charismatic and intriguing stranger. Told in two time lines ' Sophie then ' and ' Sophie now'. We have a chilling insight into a twisted mind and a little girl who just wanted to be loved. Desperately searching for more of this author's NOW!!!!!
Many thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for the ARC in return for giving an honest review.

[Maria Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

A cracker of a book! Well paced, well written with a great twist near the end. Overall compelling read that I found hard to put down. will be watching for this author in the future. Incorporates many elements of various true crimes and serial killers. 4.5 stars, rounded up to 5!

[Kate Potapenko · Rating 1 out of 5]

It is long... way too long for what it is.
I found it extremely boring and repetitive. We're going over Sophie's emotions and feelings again and again and again and one more time...
By the time we got to the big reveal, I was so exhausted I was just happy this read was over. It didn't feel like a big reveal though.. 
I found that a lot of things, including relationships between characters didn't make much sense for one reason or another.
I wouldn't recommend it at all. The idea behind it could've made a good short story, but it was dragged too much, stretched over too many pages and repeated the same stuff way too many times..
Thank you #NetGalley for my free copy

[Linda (Lily) Raiti · Rating 5 out of 5]

This reads more like true crime than a fictional read. The fact the foreword explained it was inspired by different real life killer cases had me beyond excited to delve into it. Spotted throughout are behavioural traits familiar to the BTK, the Zodiac, the Green River Killer, Albert DeSalvo, Richard Ramirez and many more … Like, need I say more?

[Eva · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5* --> 5*

Matty Melgren was a charming, handsome man. Most of all, he was a father figure to Sophie. The man who encouraged her, supported her, played games with her and always made her feel safe. But Matty had a darker side and twenty years ago, he was handed a life sentence for multiple murders of women in the North London area. He always maintained his innocence. Now, Matty is dying and he wants to meet with Sophie one last time. Sophie is reluctant but maybe this visit will answer some questions and give her some closure. There are after all missing women whose bodies have never been found. Will Matty, after all this time, finally admit that he was indeed a serial killer?

‘Truly Darkly Deeply‘ is told via a first person narrative and I think that really works here, as it feels as if you’ve just sat down with a cup of coffee while Sophie is telling you her story. In doing so, Victoria Selman manages to put quite a delightful spin on the one thing that everyone is always thinking when a seemingly normal family member turns out to be anything but : how could they not have known? How did Sophie’s mother not see? Sophie herself might have been too young and even now, when she’s looking back on those years of her early childhood, how reliable are her memories?

Sophie’s story begins when her mother packs up their things and moves them from Massachusetts to London, England. It is here where Sophie’s mother first meets Matty and Amelia-Rose is smitten. Matty very quickly becomes an intrinsic part of their little family unit. Sophie looks up at him and puts him on a pedestal. After all, Matty is everything she could possibly want in a father. Even though Matty often seems to lie or hide things, or puts down Amelia-Rose and argues with her pretty often, Sophie will always choose his side. So when the bodies of young women start popping up all North London, Matty is the least likely suspect to Sophie.

Was Matty truly a serial killer or was the wrong man convicted of these brutal murders? Don’t expect any answers soon. They are slow in coming but boy, are they worth the wait. The journey to the reveal is immensely compelling, and because the story is told via Sophie herself, it often becomes quite emotive. It’s remarkably easy to put yourself in her shoes, to wonder, to think things through and maybe find the answers before they’re revealed to you.

It might not be the world’s most popular topic and everyone is always going to have an opinion on it, but the impact of being related to a murderer really shouldn’t be underestimated. Those who are left behind will see their lives changed dramatically. People will start to look at them differently, avoid and ignore them, whisper behind their backs. “They must have known.” Maybe some do. I’m sure most don’t. Could they have done something to prevent the murders? Is it fair to blame them? Should they feel guilty? Do you think you’d know if you were related to a serial killer? Do you ever really know someone? It’s all so thought-provoking.

You might remember that my first introduction to Victoria Selman a little while ago wasn’t as successful as I had expected based on reviews I’d seen. ‘Truly Darkly Deeply‘ is a whole other kettle of fish though and I’m incredibly glad I took a chance on it. The blurb intrigued me from the second I saw it and I didn’t look back. There’s a delightful true crime vibe to it, which I enjoyed immensely and once I started reading, there was no way I was putting the book back down before I knew the truth of it all. I raced through this, savoured the chilling reveals and once you get to the end and think back on everything you’ve read …. all that’s left to say is “well played, Victoria Selman!”. I thoroughly enjoyed this one and would definitely recommend to fans of the genre.

[The Sassy Bookworm · Rating 3 out of 5]

⭐⭐⭐-- Gorgeous cover on this book!

This is one of those books that is just insanely readable and hard to put down. I flew through it all in one go, and I enjoyed it. That said, it had a few issues that lowered my rating a tad. The first being that it was quite repetitive. Especially with Sophie's inner thoughts. The jumping back and forth between timelines could have been made more clear by adding a simple date header. The third issue was that I felt the ending go a little convoluted. There were revelations (most of which I had already figured out) but they came across a little jumbled and vague. Overall, though, it was still an enjoyable read!

**ARC Via NetGalley**

[Demi Stein · Rating 3 out of 5]

Originele recensie: https://meerboekenblog.nl/niet-mijn-s...

--

SAMENVATTING:
Het boek start op een bijzondere manier. We zien hoe Sophie in haar jeugd toekijkt hoe een havik een mus verslindt. De laatste zin van de proloog is: “Dat was een leugen, Sophie. Je had alle reden om bang te zijn. En het zou niet allemaal goedkomen.” Het verhaal van Sophie begint op een intrigerende manier en zorgt ervoor dat je je afvraagt waar ze dan bang voor had moeten zijn en wat deze proloog betekent. Hierdoor wordt je geprikkeld om verder te lezen en dit gevoel blijft de gehele tijd!

Sophie is op jonge leeftijd met haar moeder verhuisd naar Londen, haar vader is niet in beeld. Haar moeder krijgt daar een relatie met Matty Melgren. Een man waar Sophie direct een klik mee heeft en wie ze uiteindelijk gaat zien als haar vader. Ze zag nooit iets raars of afwijkends aan hem en voelde zich altijd op haar gemak bij hem, tot het moment dat hij opgepakt werd voor de gruwelijke moorden op jonge vrouwen die Noord-Londen teistert.

--

HOE GOED KEN JE IEMAND ÉCHT?
Ik kan mij geen enkel moment in mijn leven herinneren dat ik mij heb afgevraagd of een familielid of bekende iets te maken heeft met de moord op iemand. Je kunt het je gewoon niet voorstellen dat iemand die jij kent, mensen omlegt. Sophie is verontrust over de moorden op jonge vrouwen in Noord-Londen, mede doordat haar moeder veel op de vermoorde vrouwen lijkt. Zoals ik hierboven aangeef, ziet ze Matty als haar vader. Matty woont echter niet bij hen en verdwijnt regelmatig van de radar, vaak onder vermelding dat hij nodig is op het crisiscentrum.

Ondanks dat er momenten zijn waarop ze dagenlang niets vernemen van Matty, verdenken Sophie en haar moeder geen enkel moment Matty. Hij zou zoiets nooit kunnen doen. Hij heeft een onwijs sociaal karakter, is altijd vrolijk, ziet het beste in mensen en werkt daarnaast ook nog eens als rouwconsulent. Toch wordt hij verdacht van de moorden op vele jonge vrouwen, een onwijs grote schok voor Sophie en haar moeder.

Sophie is boos, bang, schaamt zich, maar gelooft ergens ook niet dat Matty deze moorden heeft gepleegd. Haar gevoelens zijn, begrijpelijk, helemaal overhoop gehaald. Woede neemt vaak de bovenhand en daarom begrijpt ze ook niet dat haar moeder Matty steunt tijdens de onderzoeken en rechtszaak. Wanneer Matty daadwerkelijk wordt veroordeeld, weet ze: ik wil nooit meer iets met hem te maken hebben. Ze probeert haar leven zo goed mogelijk te leven, maar deze gebeurtenis blijft een grote invloed hebben. Op een dag besluit Matty contact met haar op te nemen en Sophie twijfelt of ze, voor het eerst sinds de veroordeling, bij hem op bezoek gaat.

De gevoelens die Sophie dagelijks teisteren komen realistisch over. Je kunt je als lezer goed inleven in haar schuldgevoelens, maar haar woede én schaamte zijn ook zeer begrijpelijk. Victoria Selman heeft daarmee een personage gecreëerd die levensecht overkomt, wat welkom is in een verhaal dat je je bijna niet kunt voorstellen.

De schrijfwijze van Selman is prettig en toegankelijk. Het verhaal is opgedeeld in korte hoofdstukken en in combinatie met de schrijfstijl van Selman én de behoefte om erachter te komen hoe dit eindigt, zorgt dit ervoor dat je door het boek heen vliegt.

Het gehele boek blijf je je afvragen hoe dit verhaal eindigt. Het verhaal is niet zozeer spannend doordat je al weet wat het oordeel is, maar toch ervaar je een spannende sfeer doordat Sophie een brief van Matty heeft ontvangen en zij terugblikt naar hoe het leven met Matty was. Door deze bijzondere, en ook prettige opbouw, verwachtte ik een hoop van een eventuele wending en einde van het verhaal. Hoewel ik de gekozen wending niet zag aankomen, viel het mij ergens toch tegen en vond ik het wat flauwtjes bij de sfeer van de rest van het verhaal.

Desalniettemin is Niet mijn schuld een interessante thriller. Het geeft een kijkje in het leven van een gezin dat leeft met een veroordeelde moordenaar en het laat zien dat sommige mensen onwijs sterke maskers kunnen dragen. Het is een vermakelijk verhaal, dat je door de prettige schrijfstijl gemakkelijk en snel kan uitlezen. Het is dan ook een aanrader voor wanneer je graag een spannend, maar interessant verhaal wil lezen zonder al te veel te moeten nadenken.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

The story flicks between past and present from the point of view of Sophie as a child and an adult in present day. I really felt for this young girl who has moved countries leaving all her friends behind and having to start a fresh. Matty is someone who Sophie in some ways idolises. She has more freedom to watch things as well as having treats which her mum wouldn’t be able to afford herself so it was easy to see why she would consider him almost as a father figure.

As the story goes along, there were certain things and actions with regards to Matty that made me have some serious doubts about him, one especially. However, I did find myself going back and forth as to whether he was guilty of the murders that he finds himself in prison for. There are some people that do believe he is innocent and due to when these crimes took place, forensics were nowhere near as advanced as they are now, so it certainly left me with some doubts.

In some ways, this story will have you querying how well you truly know someone. Some serial killers can be charming and can hoodwink others into thinking they are a lovely person so it can be a huge shock to people that are close to them although am sure it can be tempting to turn a blind eye. We see what life is like for Sophie and her mum when Matty is first convicted and how people they were once friends with start to keep their distance and question whether they knew what he was doing. As part of the title says, this storyline goes very deeply and I could fully understand why Sophie years later would still have some unanswered questions.

Truly, Darkly, Deeply is a story that will dig deep into your mind and mess with it. It is deliciously dark and so very twisted! I quickly became engrossed in the author’s storytelling and didn’t want to put it down. The twist when it comes was totally unexpected and heightened my enjoyment of this novel even more and made me extremely eager for the author to write more standalone novels in this genre!