Jesus Wept: When Faith and Depression Meet

by Barbara Cawthorne Crafton

Praise for Jesus Wept "What courage it took for this priest and poet to explore depression in people of faith. Barbara Crafton writes with exquisite nakedness about the futile search for meaning in the meaninglessness of despair. Her own salvation is a beacon to those who believe God means them to suffer in order to understand."
— Gail Sheehy , author, Passages ; Understanding Men's Passages "Writing well about depression is not nearly as challenging as surviving the beast, but it is still a hard thing to do. Having written about my own depression, I can say with some authority that Barbara Crafton, a fellow sufferer, writes wonderfully well on this difficult topic.... This book offers truth about the devastating darkness of this disease and about the hope that makes it possible to find one's way back to the light. Barbara Crafton offers up her truth with humor and gritty stories as well as candor and care.... May the many who suffer?and those who care for them, read this book, shed the shame, and find the new life that awaits them on the other side."
— Parker J. Palmer , author, A Hidden Wholeness , Let Your Life Speak , and The Courage to Teach "Having known the tension of faith and depression in her own life, Barbara Crafton offers us wisdom that comes from years of reflection, of faithful practice, of knowing 'dark is not dark to you, O Lord.' (Psalms 139:11) She has no truck with pablum Christianity; she knows that faith that does not meet our darkest days is no faith at all?. Crafton offers sound insight and speaks the truth in love, offering hope and acceptance to those of us who struggle with depression."
— Mary C. Earle , author, Broken Body , Healing Spirit: Lectio Divina and Living with Illness and Beginning Again: Benedictine Wisdom for Living with Illness

Genres: Psychology, Christian, Religion, Mental Health, Nonfiction, Christianity, Memoir

164 pages, Hardcover

First published April 1, 2009

Reviews

[Elizabeth · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was unimpressed by this book. Written by an Episcopal priest who has had depression for many years -- who was long resistant to admitting that she was ill. Every time I shut the book I came away with an impression of, "Depression sucks. And it's really hard to admit that you need help" (even when I was cognitively aware of actually useful things I had read in the book).

She shares her own story and those of many people she has encountered, and while there's useful stuff in there, it feels more memoir-ish than really useful -- especially since she mostly doesn't go beyond the basics: feeling depressed doesn't mean you have failed in your faith, psychiatric drugs can be a way of helping you heal, etc. (I also quickly tire of folks who remained super-highly-productive even while falling apart internally.) Admittedly, the end of the book is a bit better (the chapter on centering prayer, for example).

She frequently emphasizes the importance of being straightforward about her illness (e.g, "I believe we'd all be better off if we were a great deal more matter-of-fact about depression than we are. I've not known shame to be much help to me or anyone else in getting better from anything, and certainly not from this sickness of the soul." p. 45) but then she says stuff like:

And then there is the task of helping people take the first step of agreeing to see a psychotherapist at all. It can take months of patient listening to help a person view this as anything but shameful. Sometimes they react to the suggestion that they could use professional help as if they had been accused of a crime, as if the presence of a psychic illness invalidated all their experience and all their competence. I'm not crazy, they say indignantly.
      Well, neither am I, I have learned to answer, and I've been in psychotherapy many times. I see a therapist now. In fact, you've never known me when I wasn't in therapy.
(p. 21)

Is she saying that she has learned to say to people, "I'm not what you think of as 'crazy' but I'm in therapy [and thus you too could be in therapy without having to be what you think of as 'crazy':]" or does she actually think of "crazy" as something that Other people are, that somehow doesn't apply to her (and which language usage she doesn't need to interrogate at all, even if only for the benefit of the reader of this book)?

The fact of the recurrent fail is most of what tipped this from a 2-star review to a 1-star.

Every parish priest needs a good rolodex: who are the competent therapists in the area? And who are the loonies I should avoid? What agencies can connect uninsured clients who need psychotherapy but cannot pay the going rate?
(p. 21)

The only time I felt normal was when I was working in the breakfast feeding program. Jennifer had been volunteering there for several years. The guests there didn't stop getting hungry just because the World Trade Center was bombed by a bunch of lunatics in airplanes.
(p. 28)

Wow, Ms. Crafton, has no one pointed out to you the power of language to harm and marginalize and stigmatize people?

Honestly, I felt dismissed reading parts of this book.

For example, on pages 40-41 she quotes various people who have had negative experiences with church around their mental illness. The last one, on page 41 is "Faye":

Every church you walk into has the image of a man being tortured and murdered that is much more powerful than the sense of resurrection. There was so much emphasis on brokenness that it contributed to my hopelessness.

I thought this was a powerful articulation of how a focus on, especially a glorification of, Jesus' suffering on the Cross can be so harmful -- a way to invite church folks to think seriously about the symbols they use, where their focuses are, etc.

Crafton writes, "Such a spectrum of woes where church teaching, practice---even décor---are concerned! No wonder so many are tempted to just close out the churches account altogether" (41-42).

It's possible to read her as saying, "Even what we think of as 'mere décor' can have real import," but that certainly wasn't the feeling I got.

[Cynthia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book offers an honest, personal look at depression as it may be experienced particularly by persons of faith. The author, an episcopal priest, recounts her own struggle with depression and quotes many others reflecting on their despair, darkness, shame, faith and doubt. I found the chapter "Wanting to Die," least helpful, perhaps because there are no words to reconcile this depth of despair with the concepts of faith and hope. The truth and honesty of this small volume offer understanding and insight to those who suffer and those who care for them.

[Jonelle · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book got great reviews, but I didn't like it. Written by an Episcopal priest who has experienced depression, she didn't really offer much new to my knowledge of depression, just that depression is different than 'the dark night of the soul', but when depression and questions of faith and God get mixed up together, it can be a toxic brew.

[Stephanie · Rating 1 out of 5]

You have to have hope and trust in the Lord. You may not sing on your first day of recovery but with time you will. This book was nothing to sing about.

[Patricia · Rating 5 out of 5]

To begin to reach an understanding of depression, choose a book like “Jesus Wept; When Faith and Depression Meet” by Barbara Cawthorne Crafton. Crafton is herself a survivor of depression and as such speaks with intimate knowledge of the insights associated with depression. The title drew me to this book; one of my favourite bible verses, found in John 11:35. As a sufferer of depression, and a person with a strong faith, I was curious how Crafton reconciled the two. Rather than dwell on the differences between faith and depression, Crafton reaches for where the two cross over.

For example: what is normal faith, what is normal depression? There are no lists answering either of these questions, but within this book Crafton highlights both situations. An aspect of depression that Crafton speaks of is that it is a mistrust of self. If one does not have faith, there exists a mistrust of God.

Depression is a dark time. Feeling one is searching for God has been identified as a spiritual darkness. I believe that Crafton’s book will help you sort through both of these difficult conditions. Weaving through faith and depression, Crafton assists us, the reader, in choosing where with both we are situated and how we can help ourselves move forward.

My blog is titled: “The Joy of the Written Word”. Where is the Joy in Barbara Crafton’s book “Jesus Wept”? The Joy is found in our hearts and minds when we reach through a faith struggle, and climb out of depression, to see Joy on the other side. Barbara Cawthorne Crafton will assist us in doing just that.

Choose Joy!

[Amanda Richards · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful book!

I genuinely loved reading this book. I'm so tired of being told that my depression is the result of a lack of faith, lack of trust, or just bitterness. It is incredibly heart-rending to feel ashamed of a disease that you have no control over, because of others who have tried to convince you that you have it because you've sinned in some terrible way. My depression, and the way the Church has reacted to it, is what has pushed me so far from my Christian family.
It was refreshing to find an entire book that discussed the issue candidly and from so many voices! It's not a self-help book. The only real instruction it has is in "centered prayer," which is really simply a God-focused meditation exercise (It's also quite effective for anxiety.). This book simply exists to let you know that it isn't your fault and you are NOT alone.

[Tracy · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Some chapters were consoling; others left me wanting. I'm grateful for the author's candidness on this important reality. I did feel seen. Just connected with some of the topics/stories more than others.

[Ben Merillat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting read, some good ideas and some not so good ideas. Insightful for sure, a little more humorous that I was expecting.

[Arianna Clark · Rating 5 out of 5]

I felt better reading this book regarding going through manic depression while living in Christ. The struggle Christians face when going through mental disorders and finding strength in the Word is very real an constant. To realize that your faith and followers can be a hindrance and deliverance when seeking help and greater health is overwhelming. If you are a person of faith who has lost hope, this book can provide excellent insight and make you feel assured that your journey is not as solitary as you believed.

[Briana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall I gave this book a four star rating because it was both informational and entertaining. The word entertaining here means that I was able to understand the author and relate to her struggles. Practically everything she talked about, I understood on a personal level. Several times I thought to myself, "Wow! I'm not the only one. Thank God someone else has felt that way". She also included stories from all kinds of people who have struggled with depression which I found to be helpful as well.

Why I considered giving this book a three star rating:
1) When I first saw the book I thought, "Finally! Someone has done some serious research on Jesus and is going to go into great detail about how he struggled in life and at one point struggled with depression". After all, the title is "Jesus Wept". MAJOR DISAPPOINTMENT! She does not discuss Jesus at all. I mean, God is thrown in there in some ways; but there is no major discussion overall as to what is role is in a depressed persons life. She does give a good suggestion for those who struggle with praying to a God they just feel they can't talk to. I believe it was called centered prayer which I found to be helpful.

2) I expected this to be a self-help book in some kind of way, but it really wasn't. It had more of a biography feel, mostly. So, if you are looking for some life changing book...this is not it. I was hoping to get more from it than I did, but it was well worth reading nonetheless.

And finally, I believe this is the longest review I have ever written! Woo hoo!!

[Erica · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a beautiful book. Well written, with honesty and a gentle sense of humor. The author speaks eloquently of the challenge of being in ministry while struggling with depression. She touches upon the faulty theology that some toss around when discussing issues of faith and mental health. If you are looking for a pastoral counseling resource, this probably isn't the book you are looking for. But, if you are looking for honest and heartfelt reflection, this is it. I know that there are some rumblings in some clergy communities taking issue with self-care initiatives and the like. I don't quite know what that's about, and really it's neither here nor there. I do think that this would be a helpful book for a ministry practicum class to read, or new clergy in general.

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Barbara Crafton is an Episcopal priest who writes the popular log "Geraniumfarm." In this slight edition, she deals honestly and with great feeling with the problem of depression--one that is particularly difficult for the clergy. Many Christians think their faith should see them through (I'm guessing Jews and Moslems as well). Barbara Crafton deals with that issue. For anyone who suffers from depression or those who love someone who does, this is a good book. And she's a wonderful writer.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is excellent for two reasons - if you are a depressive it will reinforce the idea that you aren't alone, that others feel like you do (with suggestions for how to help yourself/get help) and if you aren't a depressive, it will help you understand those people in your life. Also a good reminder that any kind of belief system should be it's own reward, not just a way to "cure" yourself of some unsavory trait.

[Ji Eun · Rating 2 out of 5]

There were many examples/ points of view from people who live with depression, but more than examples, I expected an analysis or critical thinking/ comparison based on people's experiences with depression and what's written in the Bible.

I loved the title and how it implies that depression is a part of our human lives, but I felt the title was misleading.

[Karen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Other than the chapter on meditative prayer, which just didn't feel right to me, this was a pretty good book. It is hard enough to deal with depression but when it affects your relationship with God it is doubly difficult. The author hit on a lot of good points. I would recommend the book to Christians suffering through depressions, but would say to take it with a grain of salt.

[Susan Brady · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read many books on depression, being a sufferer, but never one that puts it into ray emotional language the way this one does. She addresses depression and its complicated relationship with faith. Excellent.

[Alan Marr · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very good book, written by a pastor who has lived with depression as well as with some well meaning but not helpful Christian responses to the illness. i don't live with depression but live with admiration for those who do. A helpful easily read book to pass on to others.

[Kimberly · Rating 1 out of 5]

Somehow it feels sacrilegious to say I didn't like a book about spirituality. I consider myself to be spiritual, I am Episcopalian, and I have depression. Unfortunately this book did not meet my expectations - I felt that I had to finish reading it even though it was a great effort to do so.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Crafton, an Episcopal priest, takes a brave an honest look at depression. She offers no easy answers but instead tells the truth candor and care.

[Darren Hamblin · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must, must, must read for any human who finds themselves torn, daily, between the demons of depression and God we believe in.

[Alice · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful information on the spiritual life and depression.

[Dorothy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great resource for those who have personally dealt with depression- either themselves or ones they love. A must-read for chaplains and those doing CPE.

[Jean · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some chapters very helpful, others not so much.

[Sally Tiffany · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely incredible book!! The only one I have ever read that made me feel understood and cared about as a christian struggling with this. So, so happy I read this!

[Emma Easterling · Rating 3 out of 5]

gave me a lot to think about...