Within You, Without You

by Sara O'Donovan

Kathryn Johnson’s life is at a standstill. Stuck in a lacklustre marriage, the spark that once burned so brightly within her has since been snuffed out by the monotony of the everyday.

Returning to England after many years of living in Ireland, she is shocked to discover a familiar face on the side of the road one dark and stormy night. But a person can’t just reappear like that. Not when they’ve been dead for twenty years.

Uncovering long-buried memories of first love and its devastating loss, Kathryn returns to the past to see if she can rewrite her present. But love divided by time is a complicated equation to solve.

* * *

"An engaging, Sliding Doors-style tale of love and loss." Rachel Donohue

"A wonderful and moving love story. An accomplished novel of joy, passion, loss and years of regret. A real debut triumph for Sara O’Donovan." Tadhg Coakley

"This stirring evocation of love, Liverpool and the mysteries of time kept me gripped me from the first exquisite word to the last." Denyse Woods

"This is a wonderful debut novel from Sara O’Donovan. She writes beautifully and there is such a sense of compassion for her characters." Carol Drinkwater

336 pages, Paperback

Published November 17, 2022

About the author

Sara O’Donovan spent her early years in England, brought up in the worlds of horse racing and show jumping. She moved to Ireland in her late 20s and now lives in County Cork with her husband and young family. A former equestrian journalist, she now manages the West Cork Literary Festival in Bantry. Her first novel, Within You, Without You, is published by Valley Press in November 2022.

Reviews

[Lia Curtin · Rating 5 out of 5]

A thoughtful and emotional debut - I couldn't put it down!

[Zoé-Lee O'Farrell · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think until 85%, I adored this book. I was eager to get back to Kathryn and Ed and their lives. I wanted to know more about that fateful day that had hollowed Kathryn out.

Well, then things went a bit odd for me. Somehow the past had changed, people were back and an ending of relationships seemed convenient. I have no idea how or what happened. It really did confuse me and it really didn’t tie up a lot of loose ends.

However (!!) I did really enjoy this book. I was in love with Kathryn and Ed, so wrapped up in their world. I loved and breathed every minute with them for 10 days and now I kinda feel a bit bereft without them. They have been with me in the mornings and evenings and I’m not ready to replace them.

Despite the oddness of the last 20%, I feel like it has given me a bit of a book hangover. There was something about these two people that just had me hanging on their every word. I can’t explain it but that year in their life had such an impact on everyone.

In a way, I am glad it ended the way it did, and you can see it was the author’s end game but I think until I can figure out how we got there it is a conundrum for me. Not sure how a walk can change so much, but then going for a walk is always good for the soul.

It will take me a while to be over Ed and Kathryn. It may be a love story we’ve heard before but the pull on these two is something I’ve not experienced in so long. I might have to keep checking in to make sure everyone is ok.

[The Breakneck Bookworm · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book for me was a mixed bag for me. The write up didn't translate into the story I read. The book felt very YA at the start which wasn't something I was expecting but that didn't stop me from reading. The story seemed to live in the past for a vast amount of the book and the revival of a character left me completely confused. Kathryn for me was a very unlikable character. She came across as childish and vindictive and was quite happy thinking about her own feelings whilst simultaneously hurting others. I would say the portrayal of Liverpudlians in the book did irk me somewhat. Being one myself I find reading the typical stereotypical commentary about the area and its people annoyed me. It seems lazy, we aren't all druggies, robbers or out doing criminal activities yet I find myself always reading about it. Overall the book kept me reading but at the end I found I really didn't enjoy the story. Thank you to pigeonhole and the author the chance to read this book

[Michelle · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read with my bookclub Pigeonhole over 10 days, and it was a long 10 days!
The book was nothing like the blurb.
It started off ok in the present day, but after Kat thinks she sees Ed, we go back in time to when they first met and the subsequent romance. This read like a very young adult novel.
The last part was very confusing. I couldn't tell if Kat was dreaming or if it was real.
They were both unlikeable characters.
Her best friend Elaine talked sense(not that Kat took any notice).
I felt sorry for Kat's husband Mark. Not sure why they married in the first place and it was never explained why Kat did marry him.
Thanks to Pigeonhole and the author for the opportunity to read.
Not for me

[VERITY · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read with Pigeonhole and a mixed review. I enjoyed the past story, I feel that on it's own could have been fleshed out into a book. However, I was confused by the last few chapters, maybe the multiverse should have been introduced at the start. Kat wasn't the most likeable teenager, but there were reasons and I didn't dislike her, however as an adult I didn't feel she'd grown. Also we all liked Mark so wasn't happy about her cheating on him, I think if she'd had an unhappy marriage or was already divorced it would have worked better. There is some good writing in there, it just felt disjointed

[Staceywh_17 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Your one true love passes away, you meet someone else, fall in love, have a family together...then you meet your true love again and fall in love all over, because he didn't actually die...

I loved the film Sliding Doors and I fell in love a l̶i̶t̶t̶l̶e̶ b̶i̶t̶ quite a lot with this book too. It's a stunning debut from O'Donovan, beautifully written and thought provoking.

I fast became emotionally invested in the story and the characters lives and for me they became more than just characters in a book.

And there we have it, another contender for my favourite books for the year! O'Donovan is definitely an author to keep an eye out for.

Many thanks to Random Things Tours for my tour spot.

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐

[Helen · Rating 2 out of 5]

The blurb didn't really match the content of this book with a large proportion in the middle being backstory and the ending felt a little rushed and too neatly tied up. I did enjoy the writing in the middle section which perfectly evoked the intensity of first love and all the little details recreated the era in which their early meetings took place.

[Linda Kendell · Rating 3 out of 5]

Too much backstory. Only the last 20% relates to the blurb, the rest is just build and it goes on forever.
A sliding doors type scenario that is quite sweet but probably more aimed at a younger audience not yet jaded by what life has in store.

[Annie McCarthy · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent debut novel from Sara O'Donovan. Within You, Without You is a true page turner. The characters are likeable and interesting. The book had lovely flashback scenes which brought bursts of nostalgia from the nineties. I particularly loved the wonderful descriptions of places, specifically Yorkshire and Liverpool. I couldn't recommend this novel more as it will pull you into its beautiful plot and make you completely invested in the characters and their lives.

[Bookish.Caterpillar · Rating 3 out of 5]

💗 The story follows Kathryn Johnson who is living a married life lacking in love. One day she sees a familiar face whom she hasn’t seen for the last twenty years. But how is that even possible? A person can’t just reappear like that specially when he has been dead for twenty years….

💗 Pick this up if you like/don’t mind:
📌 sliding doors type plot
📌 memories of first love and its loss
📌 unlikeable characters
📌 slow paced plot
📌 plenty of flashback scenes
📌 re writing the present/ alternative reality
📌 confusing & bizarre ending

💗 I think I have got mixed feelings about this one. Till one point I was totally invested in Kathryn and Ed’s love story. It was interesting seeing how their relationship developed over time and survived despite all odds. But once the things started getting bizarre, I totally lost my interest and the story felt flat afterwards. The plot focused so much on the past that the present story and the ending felt kind of rushed. Talking about the characters I found both Kathryn & Ed quite unlikeable. Kathryn behaved totally childish and immature at multiple times. In fact Elaine and Mark were the only sensible characters in the whole story. I don’t wanna give away any spoilers but I felt happy for Mark in the end. He definitely deserved someone better than Kathryn. 💔

[Kerry https://likeherdingcatsblog.wordpress.com Robinson · Rating 3 out of 5]

A 3.5 star read
If you’re a fan of sliding doors type plots then this book will be up your street. It’s an interesting concept and works really well for a romance novel. It is suitable for a YA audience too which is great to see.
Kathryn is taking some time away from her family and doing a bit of soul searching/evaluation of her life in the process. But, how do you reconcile your first, biggest love of your life who is lost with the comfort and familiarity of a companion you made a promise too?
I really enjoyed Kathryn’s past storyline and how her relationship developed with Ed. It was so very different to her marriage to Mark. It’s more intense and has that first love vibe that is just never replicated and it is portrayed so well in this story. I did find myself lost in their story.
This is a poignant and emotional story of how things can change in an instant and provokes reflections on the what if…? Questions people ask themselves when reflecting on the past and their lives.
This is a sweet and emotional novel that has a slow burning plot and is mostly focused on characters and their journeys. It isn’t exactly what I thought it was from the blurb and title but it is a nice read.

[Fay Flude · Rating 2 out of 5]

There are some people I guess that you would be quite happy to meet again and again in different lifetimes and then there are others you wish you'd never met, not even once!
Within You, Without You, might not be a person, but it is a book that unfortunately did not enhance this current lifetime of mine. The synopsis seemed to belong to the opening and last section of the book with an adolescent love story in between. Don't get me wrong, I totally understand the power and intensity of first love, and in many ways can see that this is a good premise for a book. I know where I would slide back to and who I would slide back to be with, but that aside, I struggled to feel anything for Kat and Ed.
The ending was too tidy and convenient.
You never know, maybe in another lifetime I will rate this a 5 star read.
Thank you to Pigeonhole and the brave first time author for sharing this book with the digital, stave by stave, community.

[Fiona · Rating 3 out of 5]

Like a lot of other reviewers, I felt this story really didn't live up to the blurb. It was not at all the story I was expecting or hoping to read. The back story takes up three-quarters of the book when all we really want to know is about that present-day. When the author does get around to that, it's a bit strange and confusing to say the least.
The hope of the present-day story kept me reading but I found the whole thing, writing and characters, a bit flat. Usually, when I'm reading, I keep notes of my thoughts and reactions so I can refer back when I come to write the review. I barely wrote anything for this book, which is testament to how little it engaged me.
If the blurb had been different, I think I may have enjoyed it more. It just wasn't the story it was supposed to be and I found that frustrating.
Thanks to PH and the author for the opportunity to read.

[Nicola Mackenzie-Smaller · Rating 3 out of 5]

I cautiously enjoyed this book, which I read with The Pigeonhole. As others have said, it doesn’t bear much resemblance to its book blurb. It’s mostly focused on events in the past, where Kat, a college student, is embroiled in a relationship with Ed. Ed comes from a very different family to middle class Kat, but they fall madly in love, until something happens and their relationship is severed.
The last 20% of the book puts forward a hypothesis of an alternative reality, where the past is altered and the lovers are able to be reunited.this is a great concept but I wonder if the book might have felt like a better read if this hadn’t been flung in near the end? It’s all a bit odd to be honest.
The writing is good though, and the teenage love seems all too plausible.

[Christine Rennie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Within You, Without You by Sara O’Donovan is a love story where the main male character dies,Ed and the female character marries Mark. As a love story it does y really work because Kathryn is never satisfied with her life after Ed’s death.she marries Mark and they have a daughter who is now at university.
Then some how Kathryn and Ed meet again and become a couple because Ed wasn’t dead after all.
I found the ending very confusing and really wasn’t sure what the point of the novel was. Neither of the main characters were particularly likeable and the husband Mark just seem to accept Kathryn’s behaviour.

[Vanessa Wild · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a story about first love between a middle class girl and a boy from the wrong side of the tracks. It’s set over a period 20 years in England and Ireland. A Sliding Doors type of book, although this doesn’t become clear until nearing the end, it’s a gentle, thoughtful tale and beautifully written. The portrayal of first love is well described, that intense infatuation which rarely lasts but can have such a knock on effect on the rest of your life. It’s quite a slow burner so not fast paced. The ending did feel like I’d gone down the rabbit hole as it all gets a little other worldly! A different sort of read but quite thought provoking! 3.5⭐️

[Lola Gordon · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read this with the Pigeonhole book club over 10 days, which sadly felt like 10 years! The pace for most of the book was slow, the past was explored in excruciating detail for most of the book which resulted in the ending feeling rushed. The main character was immature, selfish, childish and showed no emotional growth at all. I didn’t connect with the characters, which sadly means that I wasn’t really invested in their lives. I think that this book was simply not right for me, although it sounded promising, it never managed to draw me in,

[Mags Schofield · Rating 2 out of 5]

The premise was good, and this started well, but quickly descended into stupidity.
Kat is a wimp and the story dealt us a huge serving of backstory that made me want to shake her. The writing was very Young Adult and immature.
Reading this is staves did the story no favours at all as the story dragged on and on.
When we eventually returned to the present, I as a reader was totally confused by the flashbacks / dream / fantasy sequences which explained nothing at all.
Very disappointing.
Thanks to the author and Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read.

[Laura Hamilton · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 really
This felt nothing like the book I was expecting from the blurb.
Had a very YA feel to the story and writing.
Kathryn in particular was incredibly annoying, and the younger version was spectacularly naive.
The flashback parts would definitely appeal to a YA audience. The plot, when returned to "The present" all went a bit weird with no real explanation and went on to be very much "tied up in a neat bow"/very convenient but with several plot holes.
Like already said may appeal to a younger audience more. With thanks to the Pigeonhole and the author for the opportunity.

[Pheadra · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this through my online bookclub, Pigeonhole and was tempted to give up on it several times. Written for what I describe as a Young Adult genre but not promoted this way it is a confusing back and forth, then and now, real and dream story of Kat(main character) and Ed her first love. A poor Changing Lanes type scenario of what if. Overall disappointing, I'd give it at most 2 and a half stars 

[Sarah Truckell · Rating 3 out of 5]

More of a Young Adult book. The book starts in the present day with Kathryn going to house sit for her Mother. Then the next 2/3 of the book travel back to her past when she’s 19 and meets Ed. It’s the story of their love. Then the story is confusing and I wasn’t sure if it was a parallel storyline or if Kathryn was dreaming. I’m still not sure about the ending and don’t really think this was for me

[Helena Moon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book and was hooked from the beginning.
I couldn't put it down.
It tells of the intoxication of first love - set against a background of 90s Liverpool - and moving to 20 years later in West Cork.
Sara writes with great warmth and originality and the tale twists and turns - and finishes in an unusual and unexpected way.
I read it cover to cover spanning a weekend.

[Theresa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the first two thirds of this book, finding out more about Kathryn and Ed. However, I did find the last part of the book somewhat confusing. 3.5🌟

I received a free copy of this book and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Barbara · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book started off well but unfortunately the back story was too long and, by the time it returned to the present day, it became very confusing. I think it might appeal more to YA readers. Thanks to the Pigeonhole for the opportunity of reading this.

[Jeanne M · Rating 2 out of 5]

Publishers blurb doesn't quite reflect the actual storyline. Book itself is a standard love story, ending becomes more convoluted and unbelievable.

Thank you to Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read.

[Lynne · Rating 2 out of 5]

From the blurb this book seemed promising but unfortunately for me it didn’t live up to expectations. The bulk of the book is taken up with a past young adult love story, middle class girl meets unsuitable working class lad from Liverpool. Ed is the more interesting character and I liked the dichotomy between his dead end roots and a realisation that he could reach for more in his life - in comparison Kathryn seems one dimensional and immature. The ending was rather clumsily done and not well integrated with the main body of the novel. I did enjoy the unobtrusive but evocative descriptive writing and I think I would have enjoyed the book more when I was younger. I read this with the Pigeonhole digital book club.

[Gail Danks · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well written but it just want for me

[Gail Wylde · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5🌟. Normally I like being taken out of my comfort zone for a book, but this time I’m afraid it just wasn’t for me.

[Star · Rating 3 out of 5]

** 3 stars **

[Chris Richardson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book. It was lent to me by a friend. Likely not something I would have chosen for myself. Sometimes hard to put down, the intensity and plot twists.