I Just Wanted to be Loved

by Stuart Howarth

The author of the bestselling Please Daddy No reveals more harrowing experiences of his neglected childhood. Having survived the terrible abuse at the hands of his stepfather, Stuart has to reach within himself again to live through the degradation of prison. He is released back into the world without any support or counselling from the authorities. The child abuse and numerous court cases had almost destroyed him, and Stuart became reliant on drugs and alcohol. With his life spiralling out of control, Stuart attempts suicide a number of times. The last try leaving the doctors that resuscitated him incredulous he had survived. At the point of no-return, Stuart was sent to an hospital in the Scottish highlands to fight the demons that assailed him and rebuild his life. This is the remarkable story of his fight to be his own man.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Abuse

288 pages, Paperback

First published February 5, 2009

Reviews

[Alexandra]

I did end up liking this book. When I first started it I did have to stop though cause I read his other book ' please,daddy,no' first. I had thought this was a reprinting under a different title. I know sometimes authors or publishers do that. Which does confuse me. Anyways. This was a heartbreaking story of Stuart's adult life. He went through A LOT, but really overcame every bump in the road. I am glad he shared his stories with the world,and is a big advocate in helping children with abuse and their own struggles.

[Jennifer Reynolds]

So happy to hear that Stuart is living one day at a time and focusing on his recovery. Always such a heart-wrenching subject when you read about abuse... I just don't understand these sick individuals and their ability to hurt the innocent. Stuart proves that children are amazing gifts to the world.

[Daniela]

What a book... finished in 5 days, cried multiple times, this is a very touching story that in a way helped me understand myself abit. Trauma comes in so many different shapes and sizes and its nice to know things can work out.

[Laura]

This follows on from Please Daddy No and tells the story of what happened in Stuart's life since he left prison. It wasn't plain sailing for sure ... but with the love and support of Tracey (that woman is a saint!), he has made it through one day at a time.

[Tina cammock]

Brilliant

Brilliant book could not put it down. Glad it all worked for him , well done great read such a sad story

[Nahla]

As Simone wrote: Moving, tragic and disturbing. Would no doubt help others experiencing something similar.
Wouldn't agree more.

[Gail Wood]

Absolutely Amazing book what he went through was heartbreaking

[Gail Danks]

Brilliant read but heartbreaking

[Denii ✨🌼🌸📚🤓💖]

A very heart touching story. I loved it! I truly deeply recommend people reading it.

[bekka]

my god

[Cheryl Sileikis]

This book is wild. It thought it was going to read like a counselling session about dysfunctional families or neglect but came to find out that it’s cutthroat, grimey, drug-ladden Manchester slammer drama journey recounted by an entrepreneur.

Howarth seems like such a gentleman, never speaking poorly about his baby mamas or any woman unless absolutely necessary, which is so refreshing and appreciated. He takes full accountability despite probably having some of the most severe PTSD I can imagine.

The center of the book, I found to wane on - it felt like a lot of 'I was addicted, snorting barbituates and drinking and taking steroids, having to go to rehab, tracey patiently being supportive' which may have been essential to the plot that I still loved - I just think that that part made me lose interest in the book for about a third of it.

He makes me wonder how many other men like there are like him (in a great way) and makes me believe that love is possible.

This book is a proper ride and Howarth is an astounding writer.

[Molly avins]

i think it is a ood book but it is very sad

[Simone]

Moving, tragic and disturbing. Would no doubt help others experiencing something similar.

[Becky Frankenfeld]

Honest and easy read