The Accidental Virgin

by Valerie Frankel

From: Venus, Goddess of Love, 120 Main, Mt. Olympus

To: Stacy Temple, lapsed temptress

Stacy, Stacy, Stacy.

You were so promising at the beginning: Sexy, smart, personable and funny. Great on dates and really great afterward-if you know what I mean. But this is a sad state of affairs; or, in your case, non-affairs! It's been nearly an entire year and you haven't had your way with even ONE eligible male. You've been working so hard concocting sexy lingerie for Thongs.com -- and really, Stacy, if that little pink velvet bustier didn't put you in the mood, I don't know what to say! -- that you haven't even tried to be coaxed out of your own thong.com!

Are you listening, Stacy? Seven days to find the perfect man -- or else!

Happy hunting!

Genres: Chick Lit, Romance, Fiction, Humor, Book Club, Adult Fiction, Ebooks

277 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2003

About the author

She's written twenty books (e.g., The Accidental Virgin and The Girlfriend Curse), and contributed to dozens of publications including the New York Times, Self, Allure, Glamour, Parenting and Good Housekeeping. Her memoir, Thin Is the New Happy, about overcoming bad body image after 30 years of dieting and self-loathing, was recently described as "Rueful, zestful and surprisingly funny," by the New York Times.

Reviews

[Savanna G. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Let me just start by saying that this book was an oxymoron from the very beginning. The title is ‘The Accidental Virgin’ but then right there on the cover the subtitle is ‘there are no accidents.’ The whole concept of this book is....a mess. Stacy Temple is on a mission to find a sex partner. Why? Because it’s been almost a year since she’s had sex, and if she goes a full year without having sex, she’s considered a Virgin. Not to rain on the author’s parade, but I don’t think it works like that. Once your virginity is gone, that’s it, no matter what you do after that, it’ll never come back.

The story was almost okay, up until chapter 6, and then it started getting a tad annoying and Stacy started becoming a huge...well, bitch, and some parts of the story had me hella confused. For example, in chapter 6, Stacy goes from laying in her bed to sitting in her conference room desk at her occupation at 3 a.m. and then to her living room from there for something to eat. The book said it was just her thoughts but Stacy never went to sleep nor woke up so it couldn’t of been a dream, it was all around a chapter of confusion.

Another thing that got under my skin a lot was that the author tried to be humorous by adding a bunch of puns but they weren’t even funny, they actually became quite annoying after a while. “Male Lingerie. For gay men, of course. It’s not a bad idea, I might have to talk to Fiona about that.” Stacy groaned. Fiona would of course say yes, assigning the bulk, (or should I say bulge....)” (97) EYE ROLL for the ignorance and condescending pun intended.

I did not like Stacy Temple at all. She was such an ignorant brat for an adult. In order to try and find the perfect man to seduce, she joins a dating website but erases any email responses she gets from men who she considers to have crazy screen names such as “BLACKSTAR” and “HOLDENC” (which if I’m not mistaken, is an actual name) but she actually responded to guys with screen names such as “BULLWINKLE” and “SNAP” like those didn’t at all sound crazy. Not to mention, she made her own screen name “FLUFFY” and I just found that highly ignorant of her.

To move on to Charlie, her best friend of 10+ years. Here’s where it gets even more frustrating. Stacy was so concerned about trying to get laid that she literally tried to have sex with Charlie, who, admitted to not even being attracted to her despite the fact that he has a lot of sex himself. However, she was drunk, and so he agreed to do it, just this once, despite the fact that it can potentially screw up their friendship for good. Stacy decides to bring him to a supply closet at her work place, where Charlie almost dies because he has an allergic reaction to some lavender balls in there, that obviously Stacy knew were in there. She was so focused on the sex part that she didn’t even think of Charlie’s allergies. Now, this next part really got to me. At the end, Stacy is faced with everyone she’s tried to sleep with except one, and Charlie then declares his love for her, despite him stating earlier that he wasn’t at all attracted to her. Which one is it Charlie? You either are or you aren’t, and one of them is a lie.

Stacy is also super judgmental and that’s another reason why I didn’t like her. She tried to seduce a male doctor but he put a stop to it by explaining that he was gay, and Stacy flipped out on him, arguing that people in his field of work couldn’t be gay. And then, to top that off, she finally agreed to meet with SNAP from the dating website and they met at the bar. SNAP’s picture on his dating profile was ten years old, so of course he looked a little different now. Well, he had gained some weight, and Stacy was all around disgusted by that. “The grossly fat are rarely wrinkled...” (171) she had said, and I’m literally disgusted by her crude description of people with a bigger body type then her.

The last reason why I just wanted to punch Stacy in her forehead is because she’s a gold digger. She makes $100,000/year at her job yet her requirements in a partner consist of somebody who: “has a fat stomach and thick wallet.” Talking about the same poor guy she body shamed. The only way she even considered dating him was for his money and that makes her a gold digger. It wasn’t about real love for her, just what he brought home.

Somewhere towards the middle and end we’re introduced to ‘Vampire Boy’ who’s real name is Oliver and he’s by far my favorite character. He’s the reason this review received two stars instead of one. He was so sweet. So basically, Oliver saw this video online of Stacy who pleasured herself on camera for a porn site. Once they finally hung out a little bit, he showed the video to Stacy and learned that it in fact, was an actress hired by one of the other guys she had no feelings for. Oliver was so relieved that it wasn’t actually her and I fangirled at the fact that he liked her a lot more knowing that he hadn’t actually seen her naked. Well, Stacy’s ex ends up coming after her and Oliver felt betrayed so he left, and it broke my heart that Stacy couldn’t commit to him....until the end. Stacy chose Oliver out of all the people who gathered in her apartment for their second chance to seduce her and I’m kind of mad about it because Oliver deserves so much better than Stacy, and at the end of it all, she didn’t even want to have sex so it defeated the whole purpose of her sex mission and just taught me that her not having sex is by choice.


Make up your mind about what you want Stacy...or else!

[NATUI · Rating 1 out of 5]

So. Fucking. Bad.

I received this in a grab bag of books from a neighbor. I thought it would be a light, funny read. It started with potential, but the complete idiocy of the character and her quest to keep herself from "revirginization" was so over the top and shallow I couldn't believe this was considered a novel for adults. Read it if you are interested in a truly mindless book. It's hours of your life you will never get back, but I suppose it is better than staring at the back of an airplane seat.

[Tara · Rating 1 out of 5]

Actually, I HATED this book! My girlfriend recommended it to me after I had recommended "Good in Bed" to her (and she loved "Good in Bed"). I was disgusted the whole time I read it. I think I actually threw up a little in my mouth! I think I was even a little insulted!

[Lauren · Rating 2 out of 5]

Was looking for a light summer read and thought this could fit the bill. It was definitely cliche, as the main character Stacy has been experiencing a sex drought. With a week left until it's been a year, she decides she needs to have sex before that anniversary hits. Everything that can go wrong does go wrong while she tries to rectify this and her work life isn't in much better shape.

Since this was just meant as a fun summer read I wasn't looking for strong plot, but the ending was so incredibly ridiculous, that ruined it all for me.

[Melanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m glad I read this book before reading other reviewers comments on it as I feel it would have put me off. I thoroughly enjoyed The Accidental Virgin by Valerie Frankel. Valerie has a unique way of writing that borders on the perverse (At times) but in a generally humorous manor. I can’t help but laugh out loud (Much to my partners dislike at times as he thinks I’m laughing at him) at things her characters do and say and especially in this case with Stacy our leading girl.

The story follows Stacy a self-proclaimed workaholic, who doesn’t realise till its pointed out to her by her best friend Charlie (Who is a gorgeous guy, can relate as my best friend is a guy too) that she will soon be a virgin again as she has not had sex for nearly a year, just like having a birthday if you don’t have sex for a year according to a web vixen called Gigi then you are indeed a virgin again as it will have ‘grown back’. Thus goes the conquest for Stacy to have sex with someone as soon as possible before the year is out so she is not a virgin again nor sad for not having sex for so long.

I loved the characters in this book, her neurotic bosses, her best friend and not forgetting her men whom she sets out for. I thought Stacy like a lot of us 30 something’s worries too much about other people’s views on life and how we should be a certain way etc, she was funny, crazy and all together humble and a prude at times. I’ve never seen a character flit about so much from (almost) whore to prude in a few page turns.

Over all I liked The Accidental Virgin a lot, it was funny, it made me laugh, it wasn’t meant to be taken seriously or offend women who read it, it was what it was a good old fashioned modern book of women in the 21st century and how ‘some’ of them can behave. Believable maybe, funny (for me ) yes and a quick read. I give this book 4 out of 5 stars and will carry on reading Valerie Frankel books as I think she obviously shares a similar (twisted) sense of humour to me.

Review also featured on my blog - http://www.bewitchedbooks.co.uk/

[Sandy · Rating 1 out of 5]

All you need to know about "The Accidental Virgin" is that this is the type of book that gives chick lit a bad name.

Pretend that a thirteen year old girl with decent writing skills for her age, who has never been outside her small town or had a boyfriend, was forced to watch all of "Sex and the City" and then told to write a novel about the lives of single women in New York City and their relationships. Imagine the result.

Now you don't need to read this book!

(You're welcome.)

One star.

[T.S.C. Lawrence · Rating 1 out of 5]

It's 3am, and this is my fourth and final attempt at finishing this god awful joke of a book.
I
Hated
It.
If I could give it a rating below 1 I would, simply because my mind is so baffled by the words I read on the page that even lack of sleep can't scrub them from my mind.
This book...no, just no.
In all honesty, even writing a review would make others hate it without even reading it.
Let's talk about how badly this book has aged, about how being a lesbian is called 'a last resort', the not so subtle paedophilia jokes, our main character quite literally being sexually harassed to which her OWN BOSS tells her to fucking 'suck it up'.
Her boss paying for her to fuck an escort, the MC being at work and not only trying to fuck her best friend, but trying to fuck one of her boss's sons AND another employee at another company she is trying to negotiate with.
The mind boggles at how the author believes this is in any way appropriate behaviour, justifying it as the MC just 'wanting to get laid'.
I get the book is meant to be about a woman realising she hasn't had sex in over a year, I get it. But I also didn't expect a book of a woman quite literally throwing herself inappropriately at men.
Women should fuck whoever they want, but while you are at work? When you literally are justifying fucking a married man? Justifying fucking an engaged man? GETTING YOUR BEST FRIEND INTOXICATED AND FUCKING HIM AT YOUR WORK PLACE- all because you can't get laid?
And dare I mention the insulting scene where she tells a doctor he can't possibly be gay because, quote, 'only male nurses can be gay, doctors can't be.'
To which she, AGAIN, tries to force herself onto him.
Honestly, this book didn't do anything to show how women should be free and happy to be themselves and do what they please. If anything, it makes us sound desperate, unprofessional, and like we have zero control.
Quite frankly, I'm shocked how this was allowed to even be published, let alone seen as a good fucking idea for a novel.
Now excuse me while I go bleach my damn eyeballs.

[Shanel Leonard · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this book specifically because of the title. I felt like this book was saying, This is your life. So when I started reading it, I was a bit (I don't want to say disappointed) underwhelmed. The author uses some really big words, that I find unnecessary to the story. If it was told from the protaganist point of view that would have been fine, since she was a writer or sorts but it's not. I did like the story though a woman who is still young, has forgotten how to be young. She's coming upon her revirginization (1 year since she's had sex) in a few days and she finds that depressing because let's be honest who wants to lose their virginity all over again right! So she sets out on a quest to get laid. She has some pretty laugh-out-loud encounters, trying to get in on with several worng and right people. Yet it never seems to work for her! My favorite target of Stacy's lust is Taylor. There was so much irony with Taylor because they both had the same intentions and yet they pretty much ruined their friendship, when that's what they were both after in the first place. This book is a true fiction novel. Nothing this hilarious could ever happen to one person in one lifetime. This book was good but I thought it would be more of a manifesto than a fantasy comedy of errs. If you're trying to figure out how to undo your own "revirginization" this book doesn't tell you how to fix it. Infact I think "Revirgins" like myself have probably done more harm than good by reading this book. We have spent our time reading (my favorite past-time) instead of looking for love, nooky or whatever it is that would "De-Revirginize" us.

[Tory · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sometimes I get really indignant about hating a book, but usually that's because I expected it to be good.

This one, I had ZERO expectations. I mean, seriously with a title like that? And a concept of a chick in her early thirties working for a lingerie dot com start-up trying to get laid within seven days?

How could anyone go in with high expectations?

It was far stretched, absurd, slightly insulting to the female sex and sometimes hilarious. Mostly, it made me roll my eyes.

It was just as I thought it would be.

[MyChienneLit · Rating 1 out of 5]

I have heard that her books are fabulous, so I am definitely going to try another one of her books.

But as far as this one goes, I was pretty disappointed. I have given up about a quarter of the way through. So far, we follow the main character as she struggles to avoid becoming a born-again virgin, but I found myself simply not caring why her status should matter to me. I just didn't identify with her or find her amusing, and she did not capture my empathy. To all those out there who love this book--sorry!!!

[Joanie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not good at all-really ridiculous and not in a good way. The main character realizes that she hasn't had sex in almost a year so to avoid becoming a born-again virgin she sets out to find someone to sleep with-really dumb.

[Isadora Moraes · Rating 2 out of 5]

1.5 to 1.75

[Mari Pacheco · Rating 3 out of 5]

Eu estava esperando algo como Bridget Jones's Diary e, tenho que dizer, até certo ponto, eu consegui. A história é voltada para o humor e firme no gênero chick-lit, tem o desenvolvimento da personagem a respeito dos conceitos que a sociedade impõe versus o que ela realmente se importa, tudo de uma forma bem leve, muitas vezes engraçada.
Tive alguns problemas que foram bastante similares aos que tive com Bridget Jones: a importância que a personagem dá a matérias de revista "para mulheres" (nesse caso específico, uma matéria que afirmava que após um ano sem sexo, a mulher pode ser considerada "virgem novamente"), mas pra falar a verdade, eu tenho que reconhecer a quantidade de pessoas na vida real que também são assim.
A procura desenfreada por um parceiro ou parceira me pareceu forçada, porque na verdade era: Stacy encarou o fato de que ela estava se tornado virgem novamente uma tarefa a ser cumprida, com listas de coisas a serem feitas e data limite. Um pouco bizarro, na minha opinião.
A redenção foi a melhor parte do livro, e não vou dar detalhes pra não estragar o grande final.
Acho que posso recomendar essa leitura para os que gostam do gênero.

[Kait Mulrane · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book presents some issues--the value of a woman riding on (no pun intended) her sex-life, for one--but it also is kind of relatable. I kind of related to it because Frankel obviously knows what is like to feel this way, as I'm sure a lot, if not most women, feel in 21st century USA.

I enjoyed the story OK and it was a good read for what it was. I laughed, and rolled my eyes, and I begrudgingly related to the sexist world of failed sexual encounters, bad/good lingerie, and poor self-esteem

But real quick: I'm just curious--what job just allows people this kind of free time? Because sign me up!

[Sheryl · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun, unexpected ending…stick with it

Honestly as I was going through this book I questioned whether or not I wanted to dnf it but I’m glad I didn’t. Do the scenarios the main character gets herself into far fetched? Yes but at the same time possibly believable (especially if you’ve swam in the single person’s cesspool). I’m SUPER happy I stuck it out though because the ending was an unexpected surprise that had me smiling and cheering.
Here’s to all of our inner-Stacy’s!

[Maja Silkovska · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stejsi, zaposlena u firmi koja prodaje ženski veš preko interneta, zrela ženska koja puno obećava - ponovo je nevina. Naime, prošlo je čitavih mjesec dana od kad je poslednji put put imala seks sa svojim bivšim dečkom nevinost se navratila. Puno je radila, malo je izlazila i eto nesreće! Gubitak samopouzdanja povratak nevinosti u jednom paketu.

[Devin Dobran · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a quick read. I thought It was funny and very sex on the city. Truly adorable. Though the ending was like a dream come true and I felt could be more creative . I think it Would have been interesting if the author took a different turn. I admire the courageous ways of the B protagonist. Just felt like ending was to good to be true

[Elizabeth Green · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book was not well written, nor well thought out. I understand the concept of becoming an accidental virgin, but the idea that this event is has to feel so threatening is absurd.
I didn't find any of the characters to be developed or realistic. I would highly recommend running in the other direction from anyone suggesting to read this book.

[Amee · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars really.

There were plenty of cringe and laugh out loud moments. The things people can put themselves through when they get a silly idea in their head! I think the end could have been a bit longer...or an epilogue would have been good.

[Devon Nasser · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fun quirky sexual adventure you will want to take with Stacy. After reading this book I am definitely going to see what other books Valerie Frankel has written. I loved her writing style and can't wait for more.

[Caroline Brown · Rating 4 out of 5]

So, I decided to rate this after seeing others rate this book. I started with her “the girlfriend curse” LOVED IT. So I decided, read all her books. I was as excited about “the accidental virgin” but it was good. It was well written. It did have humor in it that did make me “LOL.” I’m currently reading other books from her too and really do enjoy her style of writing and humor she puts into her work.

[Wendy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Frothy but fun, print equivalent of a smart rom com.

[Laura Fahrenthold · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pee in your pants funny!

[Kristin · Rating 3 out of 5]

A okay book, a little slow, and the ending never gave an answer.

[Claudia Battaglia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Trashy just plain trashy

[Hendrix Eva · Rating 2 out of 5]

A bit cringe, but of it's time. Like sex and the city episodes that haven't aged well. A nice ending, though. All's well that ends well.

[Beatrice Clarke · Rating 2 out of 5]

After a bit of a slow start, took me a lil while to get into it. I did kind of get into it.
I hate starting a book and not finishing it. So carried on. It's an average read.. just a bit mehhh.

[Tressa · Rating 2 out of 5]

Accidental Virgin was written well and it was funny, but I did not care for a minor character. I did not finish reading the book.

[Sherri Bryant · Rating 4 out of 5]

To begin with, the description of this book completely misled me as the Goddess of Love made no appearance in this story, whatsoever. I quickly got over that, however, and became so immersed in Stacy Temple’s life that I finished this book in 5 days! I’m still surprised by that because I’m a notoriously slow reader and there just haven’t been many books that I literally inhale so quickly.

Stacy Temple is your typical young working gal who has had her share of ups and downs in the relationship arena. After her last relationship ended nearly a year ago, Stacy’s focus turned to her career at an Internet start-up company selling sexy lingerie that she has neglected her sexual needs. No big deal, right? Apparently Stacy discovers it is a very big deal. She learns through a sex column emailed to her by a friend that after one year of celibacy, a girl gets “re-virginated.” No, “it” doesn’t grow back, but according to the column, it may as well as you are officially a virgin again. This sends Stacy on a quest to get lucky before the one year mark. With failure after failure with several prospective partners (one of which is a paid escort gifted to Stacy by her boss!!!), Stacy’s desperation rockets upward.

This book was hilarious. I laughed out loud throughout the book while shaking my head combined with a little bit of eye-rolling at what was waiting on the next page. However, I couldn’t help but cheer Stacy on. I had to give the girl points for seeing it through despite the odds of overall failure. Who knew it would be so hard to find someone to have sex with in New York City? Finding out how this would all shake out kept my anticipation level rising at the same pace as Stacy’s desperation.

This was a very fast read for me that made me laugh out loud several times. I highly recommend this to fans of both the chick-lit and contemporary romance genre who are looking for an entertaining and humorous book to escape into…eye-rolling optional.

[Chris]

Stacey Temple hasn’t had sex in a year and your best friend Charlie informs her that if a year goes by without sex she will become a virgin again. This is a gal that works for a .dot company that sells sexy lingerie. Her friend Charlie sends her a sex column to read which is written by a person by the name of Gigi. Stacy replies to the column and gets a reply from the columnist that she doesn’t like so she gives herself a week to become a non virgin. Now the antics start. She sees a guy in the an all night diner that she nicknames vampire boy but low and behold hold vampire boy is her neighbor. She tries to do the deed with her best friend Harry well that didn’t turn out well since he has an allergic reaction. Then we have Stanley who is a millionaire and has the hots for Stacy. Did I forget to mention that he has a .dot company also. That union doesn’t go well. Did I tell you about her exboyfriend who is now engaged. After all this failed attempts she just gives up and decides to go to a bar as a last resort. Who does she see in the bar but her fantasy movie star who is with a group of the bad boys that like to get notches on their belts. After all the failures she has encountered she just gives up and goes home to order a pizza. The pizza is delivered by all the men in her life of the past week. That have 10 minutes to state their case on why she should pick them to end her virgin days. Who does she pick or does she pick, can’t tell ya read the book.

It’s an easy read but doesn’t put women in a good light. Most women that read this book will most likely think or say is that they way we are or come across at times.