Triceratops and Bottoms

by Lola Faust

She was a time-traveling sexaholic in search of the ultimate dinogasm!

For Erin, life in the far future is safe, easy... and boring! Then the experimental timebelt takes her to a wild and sensual prehistoric playground. But will her forbidden lust for a strapping saurian spell disaster?

Genres: Fantasy, Smut, Fiction, Romance, Book Club, Dinosaurs, Adult

132 pages, Kindle Edition

First published December 1, 2022

About the author

From an early age Lola Faust's fantasies and reveries tilted towards the unusual and the eccentric. Though she entertained curious private journals, it wasn't until she entered the Paleontology program at the University of British Columbia that her romantic notions concerning dinosaurs took full flight.

While working towards her doctorate, Ms Faust began writing her signature saurian prose. Today she is employed by day at a leading university in her field, but maintains her anonymous and risque personality online.

She can be reached at lolafaust1984@gmail.com.

She also has an Amazon author page.

Reviews

[Steven Gray · Rating 1 out of 5]

I don't know how dinosaurs acted but it certainly wasn't like this

[Miranda]

It only took about an hour to read, and it was a crazy ride! I have a series I do on tiktok where I read crazy stories and then explain them to my husband and get his reaction. Lol.

[ladybreww · Rating 1 out of 5]

I’m not quite sure why I read this. It’s like virtual reality Jurassic park porn.

[Emily · Rating 1 out of 5]

I ... don't even know what to say...

Sam and I decided to purposely traumatize ourselves this weekend *for science* after seeing a review on Instagram. 2 edibles later, this feels like a fever dream. I am thoroughly traumatized, so objective completed.

Not only was the subject matter umm... not my cup of tea, the writing was also just... not good.

I will now be cleansing my brain with some wholesome Heartstopper today to recover.

[Livvy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Guess I’m not going to see the pearly gates after reading this

[Megan]

For moral purposes, I won't give a star raring

[Adam · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do you think that God stays in heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he has created?

[Erin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I accessed this title in the Read Now section of NetGalley. I thank NetGalley and BooksGoSocial for an egalley. All opinions expressed are my own.

Not that anyone was really begging for this to happen, but I am back with another installment of dinosaur erotica. The first five stories Triceratops and Bottoms, My Boyfriend is a Plesiosaur, Mile High Pterodactyl Club, A Carnotaurus for Christmas, and My Sexy Supersaurus feature Erin and her adventures. The bonus story Tyrannosaurus Sext is about Alice, a woman who finally meets up with the talking T-Rex that she has been texting.


After reading Dino Stud, I had to pursue the writing of Lola Faust. In this collection of short stories, as I mentioned above we meet Erin, a woman living in a future where technology has so advanced, she has a lot of leisure time on her hands. This might be a little bit of nepotism on my part BUT I do adore it when the female protagonist and I share a name. Erin, our protagonist is very sexually frustrated( so much so that she spends a lot of these stories naked) and luckily has a time-traveling belt to seek new mates( not really what I would do if I had a time-traveling belt but this is a judgment-free zone).

Sometimes she'd simply wake up craving sex and intense orgasms, so much that she'd just pack her bag and head off on a nomadic, hedonistic adventure off-world.

Now, you might be asking me "Well, Erin, surely there are some alien species that the protagonist can seek out?" My friends, there are, but our protagonist has already had a mind-blowing orgy with a large crowd of bisexual blue-skinned aliens. She's looking for something a little crazier. Starting with virtual simulation and engaging in erotic play with dinosaurs, get Erin thinking " What if I traveled back to the Jurassic Period and engaged in the real thing?"

What ensues is the most mind-boggling series of erotica stories that I have ever encountered but like a car accident, I just couldn't look away. The writing isn't really that great but I found it entertaining and humorous.

#TriceratopsandBottoms #NetGalley.




Publication Date 02/12/22
Goodreads Review Published 19/02/23

[Bobbi bobbijoreads · Rating 3 out of 5]

I recently saw another book "Wet Hot Allosaurus Summer" in a group on Facebook and wasn't sure that it was real. Down the Dino Erotica rabbit hole I went, I saw that Faust had written several of these stories and imagine my surprise to find one available to review on NetGalley. So.. here we are.

Overall there isn't much by way of characters and plot, we briefly learn of Erin struggling with boredom in the year 2122. "She'd gone around to various inhabited worlds, having sex with men, women, and beings [aliens] of all races" and still wasn't satisfied.

Then there is an invention of a time machine and she travels back to the Jurassic, where she meets a Triceratops and discovers dinosaurs are not only sentient but they also can understand her and communicate. One thing leads to another. 😚

Triceratops and Bottoms is the longest story in the book, and there are multiple short stories of Erin's travels back in time after her experience with him & wanting to connect with more dinos: My Boyfriend is a Plesiosaur, Mile High Pterodactyl Club, A Carnotaurus for a Christmas, and My Sexy Supersaurus.

There is a bonus story separate from Erin's called Tyrannosaurus Sext. A woman named Alice discovers the anonymous coworker she's been messaging is actually a T-rex. This story was different than all the previous stories because it takes place in a modern society and the T-rex speaks and has dialogue.

I wasn't sure what to expect but it definitely was what I should have been expecting based on the cover art, synopsis, and titles. I don't know that I'll be able to look at a Triceratops the same way.

* I received a free copy of this book through NetGalley and am leaving an honest review voluntarily.

[Becky (romantic_pursuing_feels) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Overall: ⭐️⭐️ 1 star for the fun of harassing everyone in my messenger with quotes
Plot/Storyline: 📖 this makes barely any sense
Feels: 🦋
Emotional Depth: 💔 I still don’t even know this person or anything about their background
Sexual Tension: ⚡
Romance: 💞
Sensuality: 💋💋 I mean… the triceratops sex scene on the beach was the most developed thing about this book lol
Sex Scene Length: 🍑🍑🍑
Steam Scale (Number of Sex Scenes): 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥? Maybe? I didn’t count them. They aren’t super long or developed but there is a variety for sure.
Humor: This whole thing is hilarious whether it meant to me or not.
Perspective: Third person from Erin for most of the book, except the bonus story at the end which was randomly from a person named Alice??

Basic plot:
Erin uses a newly developed time machine to bring her horny vagina to the prehistorical era.

Give this a try if you want:
- dino smut – Erin goes and has multiple affairs with various dinosaur species
- higher steam – dino sex is the focus of this story
- this does include a threesome with another human, Kim, that goes with Erin to jack off a supersaurus
- you’ll have to be okay with a decent amount of formatting and spelling errors
- you want to say you read a dino smut book titled Triceratops and Bottoms. Come on, you know you wanna...

My thoughts:
Whyyyyy do I do this to myself?? I should have glanced at reviews first because I had the same issues as many others.

The formatting errors are unfortunate because that was rough for me. Almost every page had weird page breaks along with the title “Triceratops and Bottoms” and the chapter section interspersed in the text and it made it really hard to read. Harder than dinosaur smut should ever have to be!

For example, upon opening

Erin stood on the balcony of her suite, letting the soft golden rays of sunlight bathe her smooth skin. She was completely nude, her firm breasts thrust out and her perky nipples erect. She 1

Triceratops and Bottoms closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, craving something deeper...more meaningful.


So in this particular break, it read like ‘Triceratops and Bottoms’ was the heorine’s name and honestly that would have only made this book better. So that got really annoying while working through the book.

I wasn’t expecting a masterpiece. I wasn’t expecting historical accuracy. I did want it to be readable though…

The most developed story is the love affair on the beach with the triceratops. Except the heroine named her triceratops Cera! Huh??? Why would you do that to anyone that watched The Land Before Time???

Honestly I thought that was all I was going to get was triceratops love. BUT I GOT SO MUCH MORE! I had no idea there were other titles within this story, including My Boyfriend is a Plesiosaur, Mile High Pterodactyl Club, A Carnotaurus for Christmas, My Sexy Supersaurus…

My favorite part was reading about how Erin got banned from time traveling for harassing the dinosaurs. Don’t worry though, life finds a way and she’s able to go back for more dinosaur dick.

I got Dino Stud at the same time as this one and I am just hoping it’s better than this.

Content warnings:

This whole book is a content warning


Locations of kisses/intimate scenes:
Sorry – didn’t log these but there’s a variety and they are frequent! Oral for her, various humping, a threesome, penetration, jacking off a giant dino dick (praying to god NO ONE IN MY FAMILY EVER FINDS MY GOODREADS ACCOUNT)

[Biblio · Rating 4 out of 5]

Idk why people are shocked, they literally picked up a dinosaur porn book. It’s called triceratops and bottoms for a reason. This was silly and short. Just how I like my obscure erotica. Who knew dinosaurs were such empaths? I did figure they were hung though. If I had to go back and pick a Dino to bang it would definitely be a triceratops.

[Jennifer Colvin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well…that was exactly as described. LMAO!
Do I question my sanity? Yes.
Did I laugh myself into tears? Also, yes.
Do I regret it? No.
Was it a turn on? Also, no.

Erin is bored with what the future has to offer for all her sexual needs. A time machine becomes available for testing and our girl Erin volunteers as tribute cause she’s ready to get freaky in the trenches of WWI…or better yet with some GD dinos. Why the hell not? On her adventures she discovers dinos can understand her and she knows how to turn them on.

These short stories were wild. Every time I thought I was finished reading this, another short story snuck up on me that was even more outrageous than the last. And the ‘bonus story’ dino actually talks.

Why did I read this? For shits and giggles. And damnit I laughed my ass off.

So, why 3 stars? Embarrassingly for me, this had potential to be a longer story with, weirdly enough, more depth. The writing was juvenile and things progressed at an alarming rate. Bonus points if, as the ‘about the author’ states, this was written by an actual paleontologist who remains anonymous.

Thank you? to NetGalley for providing an ARC.

[Blandrea · Rating 3 out of 5]

A woman uses a time machine to go back in time and bonk dinosaurs.

Because of course she does.

I don't even know how to rate this because it's at the top end of the range for Lola Faust weirdness, and has a complete story arc. But if you pick this up NOT having context for Lola Faust, you might find yourself needing eye bleach.

Bonkers weirdness, but that's what I came here for...

I'll leave it for you to decide.

[Darby Warfield · Rating 1 out of 5]

I will never eat Dino nuggets again. Read for the laughs was horrified instead.

[demondelusions · Rating 1 out of 5]

Just...no.

[Kimbot the Destroyer · Rating 2 out of 5]

Respectfully, I wanna know more about the quasi-legal cyborg sex club under the dormant volcano in Antarctica.

[Kerry Crabbs · Rating 2 out of 5]

Gross.

[Rachael McDowell · Rating 1 out of 5]

I will simply never recover

[Courtney McKenna · Rating 1 out of 5]

Tik Tok had me curious. Should have stayed curious 🤣

[Clutch My Pearls Podcast · Rating 5 out of 5]

We're a podcast for smut!
*We rate every book 5 stars, we're here for the smut*

Episode 54, "Triceratops and Bottoms"

[Hail Quigley · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 stars strictly because the author studies palaeontology and now it is my life’s mission to meet her wild brain. The rest of the book was not the worst erotica I’ve read but I am questioning my sanity after reading.

[Dion Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

I know what you’re thinking, why is he reading an erotica/romance book, Dinosaurs! That is why, lol
I got this because of the cover and I thought it would be a novelty, something a bit silly and fun, and it was.

I did find the stories a bit too simple for my liking, I would have liked them to be a bit more complex, maybe with some comedy in it.
But, all in all, it was ok,

[Sienna · Rating 1 out of 5]

0.5/5.
0.5 because it has dinosaurs.
I feel more stupid and have lost IQ points from reading this. To take a page from Jurrasic Park... "you were so preoccupied with whether or not you could, you didnt stop to think if you should". This book should not have been written in to existence.

[Kimberly Bass · Rating 1 out of 5]

Hey. Quick question. What the fuck?

[Jenn Beaubien]

I never thought I would spend my Saturday reading and reviewing dino porn. But in all fairness, Jurassic Park is one of my favorite films. So perhaps this was an inevitable progression. Upon learning of the existence of this novel, I immediately had to understand the mechanics of how such a story would unfold. Turns out, a triceratops isn’t very inventive.

I thought I was just settling in for 70 pages of Triceratops & Bottoms, but no. There were 5 additional stories of sexual adventures included in this Kindle Unlimited download: My Boyfriend is a Plesiosaur, Mile High Pterodactyl Club, A Carnotaurus for Christmas, My Sexy Supersaurus, and Tyrannosaurus Sext.

Triceratops & Bottoms begins with the story of a woman, Erin, from the year 2122 who is bored with her countless sexual escapades among men and women of all races and just needs something new to spice up her sex life. When lucky her, the human race unlocks the secrets of time travel!

Erin has no idea how great she has it. But why would she? This life is normal for her. She can “summon a pleasure bot or holographic companion for immediate gratification” whenever she pleases and enjoys sex under the polar nights with aliens from other planets. But what pleasure is to be found at underground cyborg sex clubs hidden under a dormant volcano in Antarctica when you can time travel instead? Naturally, Erin volunteers to test the new technology and travels back to the “Jurassic Era.”

*sigh*

Now, I can suspend my disbelief of time travel and fucking a dinosaur. That is why we’re here. But if Goodreads is to be believed, the author studied Paleontology.

For fuck’s sake, there is no Jurassic Era! The Jurassic Period was during the Mesozoic Era. And you know what else? There were no triceratops or tyrannosauruses during the Jurassic Period!! Is it too much to ask for just a tiny sprinkle of accuracy? But anyways, back to the story.

In this "Jurassic" landscape she comes across a group of triceratops and, using her futuristic technology, saves them from a T-Rex attack. As a thank you for her heroics, a male triceratops Erin affectionately names Cera lets her ride on his back to a cave for safety. Ready? Here comes the steam. The repetitive grinding Erin experiences riding Cera's back as he runs through the forest gets her all hot and bothered. But how does one seduce a prehistoric creature you ask? Easy! Erin must dance a stripper routine to draw the triceratops’ gaze. God, so hot!

Now, calm down. If you thought this story was just going to be about sex, you were dead wrong. It’s about romance.

“This triceratops laughed at her jokes and posed for her to sketch it.”

“Erin kissed the triceratops again, slowly this time. The tip of her fingers brushed over the side of his face, teasing him, arousing an ancient need in him.” You know, that ancient need for a race that won’t exist for 65 million years. Can we take a moment to visualize this make out session?

Are you hot yet? I know I wasn't.

From sensual humping, to extensive oral sex, and doggy-style penetration, this dinosaur delivers. Erin wants for nothing. They spend the next week gazing into each others eyes, fucking on the beach, and connecting on a soul-deep level. That is until, tragically, Erin’s time travel device batteries run low and she must return home to her normal life.

It’s not like I had specific expectations going into this…but this is dino porn. I don’t need romance. I need animalistic savagery! This creature weighs 26,000 lbs. It should dominate her. The only understanding between Erin and this prehistoric creature should be the language of sex! The dinosaur should not laugh at her crappy jokes to get laid.

Furthermore, Lola Faust’s writing just isn’t as alluring as one would hope. Especially when you’re trying to convince someone to be sexually attracted to a dinosaur. Phrases like “globs of cum” and “if he had come inside of her, it would surely make her belly bloat up with the force of it” pulls a girl out of the moment real quick.

And the rest of these stories that follow Erin? Well, don’t worry. A triceratops isn’t the only dinosaur ready for some human delivered pleasure and Erin won’t be held back by the love she once fostered with Cera. Unfortunately, you won’t find another dinosaur that’s down to fuck.

However, if humping various dinosaurs’ backs like a dog in heat is enough to get you off, then these additional stories are for you! Personally, I prefer more variety (and humans), so I will be electing not to read anything further from Ms. Faust.

Happy humping!

[Louis Lebel]

Harrowing

[Amanda · Rating 1 out of 5]

I had extremely low expectations for this.. and yet somehow it was worse then I imagined possible

[Stephanie · Rating 2 out of 5]

ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.

I was really hoping for something a little deeper here rather than just a horny girl traveling through time to hook up with dinosaurs. This is obviously not my usual type of read and at least the title is punny! It also needs a ton of editing work and basic formatting issues made it difficult for me to keep going.

[Cody Stringfellow · Rating 1 out of 5]

Uh, objectively the worse thing I’ve ever read. I did have fun with it, in a terrible, train-wreck kind of way. Wouldn’t recommend, good for the memes though. 😂😅😶

[Terra · Rating 1 out of 5]

**crazy book club shits and gigs read - My expectations were low and somehow the author shot even lower. Consistency was not key here.