Self Help

by Ben H. Winters, Wil Wheaton (Reading), Ron Perlman (Reading)

A darkly comedic thriller by the New York Times best-selling author of Underground Airlines , The Last Policeman , and the Audible Originals Q&A and Inside Jobs . Jack Diller is just one more struggling actor on the road to nowhere. He's got an agent who barely remembers his name, his ex-girlfriend has hooked up with a Silicon Valley dude, and the milk in his fridge is so far past its sell-by date it's historic. The only way Jack can scrape together a bare existence is by delivering food to exactly the types of successful people he wishes he could be. Then, one day, a very strange audiobook shows up on his phone. The Killer Instinct seems to be your basic self-help guide, narrated by a washed-up action star named Hector Bruno, and brimming with cheesy advice for how to get your life together. With so little to lose, Jack starts listening...and listening some more. He starts talking to Hector like he's his best friend. And then...Hector starts talking back.

Genres: Audiobook, Fiction, Thriller, Science Fiction, Horror, Humor, Novella

Audio CD

First published May 26, 2022

About the author

Ben H. Winters is the author most recently of the novel The Quiet Boy (Mulholland/Little, Brown, 2021). He is also the author of the novel Golden State; the New York Times bestselling Underground Airlines; The Last Policeman and its two sequels; the horror novel Bedbugs; and several works for young readers. His first novel, Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters, was also a Times bestseller. Ben has won the Edgar Award for mystery writing, the Philip K. Dick award in science fiction, the Sidewise Award for alternate history, and France’s Grand Prix de L’Imaginaire.

Ben also writes for film and television. He is the creator and co-showrunner of Tracker, forthcoming on CBS. Previously he was a producer on the FX show Legion, and on the upcoming Apple TV+ drama Manhunt.

He has contributed short stories to many anthologies, as well as in magazines such as Lightspeed. He is the author of four “Audible Originals”– Stranger, Inside Jobs, Q&A, and Self Help — and several plays and musicals. His reviews appear frequently in the New York Times Book Review. Ben was born in Washington, D.C., grew up in Maryland, educated in St. Louis, and then grew up a bunch more, in various ways, in places like Chicago, New York, Cambridge, MA, and Indianapolis, IN. These days he lives in LA with his wife, three kids, and one large dog.

Reviews

[Faith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jack is an actor whose agent never gets him any jobs. He lives among the super rich of Los Angeles, including the new boyfriend of his ex girlfriend. Then, a self help audiobook (written by the star of a long-ago hit movie) pops up on his phone, promising to get him everything he is missing out on in life. The book starts to give him strangely personalized advice that leads to unexpected consequences.

This book was amusing and clever, taking jabs at Hollywood and Silicon Valley. The other books that I have read by this author were more serious. I enjoyed his lighter side. The excellent narrators of this Audible Original were Wil Wheaton and Ron Pearlman.

(Note that at the moment this book is not linked to the author’s other works. Probably because whoever added it to the database didn’t add a period after his initial.)

[Karla · Rating 3 out of 5]

Story 3 stars**
Audio 4 stars**
Narrators Wil Wheaton & Ron Perlman

[Char · Rating 5 out of 5]

A novella-sized bit of great fun, with most excellent narration by Will Wheaton and Ron Perlman.

If you are an Audible member, this one is free and well worth your time!

[ᒪᗴᗩᕼ · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you like Wil Wheaton as a narrator and you have audible plus...listen to this one. It didn't have a sucky ending, either. This felt a little crazy when I first started it...but I ended up really liking it. Hailed as a darkly comedic thriller...it fits that perfectly. It should strike a chord with avid Audiobook listeners.

[Boudewijn · Rating 3 out of 5]

A 3 hour Audible original which was amusing and posed a nice distraction from my other more hefty volumes. The audio quality is perfect, Ben H. Winters has written an entertaining story. I saw another GR member comparing it to a 'cheesy B-movie' and this fits the description perfectly. I liked this B-movie. Coupled with Wil Wheaton's narrating voice makes this a fun audiobook.

[Tiff · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a really fun and faced passed short story with an ending I truly didn't expect.

Will Wheaton is one of my favorite narrators (and the only reason I even stumbled on this) and he did not disappoint!

[Kev Kim · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was fine. The performance was solid and the story was fun and escapist enough to distract me from doing my dishes. There wasn't really any consistent or meaningful character development, which I can't truly fault the the book for. This is what I imagine the book version of a "dime-a-dozen" horror movies on Shudder Network.

Our lead isn't really likeable, but he also isn't detestable. He's an aspiring actor who, as far as we know, hasn't found much success. He fuels this dream by taking jobs off a food delivery app and by making regular trips to the house he hopes to one day move into. It's just enough to paint a picture of the kind of underdog you don't particularly keep tabs on, but wouldn't be upset to see find some success.

Everyone else in the story is more shape than character; Just enough of person to give the main character someone to talk to or take hostage. There's no time in this very short story for anyone to have any spotlight, but there's no love lost for any of them.

Strip away the trappings of a modern gig-economy and this is just a power fantasy messily wrapped up as a cautionary tale, for some reason.

This would have worked better if it were even shorter, or, if as a longer more explored piece.

[Natalie H · Rating 3 out of 5]

August 2023
Audio book edition
3hr something (already returned) 1.3x speed

This was from the start a weird one. Will did a great job as always. The story itself was...strange. You've got Jack, an aspiring actor that went nowhere, delivering food and being pitied by his ex girlfriend and her new boyfriend. An audio book from an actor changes his life. At the start it seems all good and then it gets bad. Hector pushes Jack into crime and that's a slippery road down. It's mainly Jack with a little concern call around from the ex and the ex's friend. I didn't know where this one was going. It could've been anything from demon possession, evil spirit or the sci-fi route.

With the amount of times Dorothea was mentioned I should've expected she had something to with it. The scam was clever if not creepy. I did feel a little sorry for Jack getting played but yeah, dead guy and kidnapping, there's no way back from that. Not a happy ending for Jack and nothing else from the scam apart from the attempt on the only witness. It was an interesting one, if not a cringey downward spiral for Jack.

[Mona · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

An “Only on Audible”/Audible Originals audiobook only (no text), free to Audible Plus members.

Very weird, darkly humorous horror story, well written
by Ben H. Winters and expertly performed
by actors Wil Wheaton and Ron Perlman.

It’s a parody of Hollywood, L.A., the tech business, and of course, the self-help industry.

Very well done. And it’s short.

Except it wasn’t really my cup of tea, which is
why I didn’t give it a higher rating.

So:

Performances, writing, production, music, etc.: 4
My enjoyment of the audio: 3

[Suzy K · Rating 3 out of 5]

Short and entertaining audiobook, well-narrated by Wil Wheaton & Ron Perlman. I felt like I had a skeptical eyebrow raised the entire time I listened, wondering, where is this book going. The ending made the extra wrinkles worth it. 😆

[Jessica · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun quick read. Picked it for Wil Wheaton and Ron Perlman, they were great. This book is like a cheesey B-Movie turned into a book, and I love a good cheesy B-Movie.

[Alex Shrugged · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! This was a great audiobook. Great narration too.

The story: Jack Diller, a never-has-been actor, downloads an app to his phone that inspires him to use his "Killer Instinct." The app's narrator, Hector Bruno, speaks to Jack and leads him down a dark path of robbery, burglary and possibly murder. (I'd say it was self-defense, but I doubt the police would have seen it that way.) Eventually Jack must track down Hector Bruno to help him get out of the fix Jack finds himself in.

Any problems with this story? Not really. I thought Jack Diller was pretty pathetic, but he was supposed to be. Hector Bruno was extremely inspirational. Think of that movie "Yes Man" (2008) starring Jim Carrey. Carrey agrees to say yes to everything and soon gets into trouble, then gets out of trouble by saying yes again... and so forth.

The ending was a little ambiguous but satisfying. I smiled.

I'll probably listen to this audiobook again.

[Virago · Rating 5 out of 5]

An audiobook about a sentient audiobook narrated but Wil Wheaton and Ron Pearlman. Does it even need a review?!

This was amazing. It was funny, and mysterious and I wanted to just take the protagonist, Jack, by the shoulders and shake some sense into him.

Jack gets repeated pop-up ads on his phone for an audiobook company. He finally bites the bullet and signs up for his free book. The book speaks to him, literally! It knows him by name and encourages him to embrace the "Killer Instinct". This sends Jack on a series of epically bad life choices, and unfortunate events.

I loved every minute of this book.

[lauraღ · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ah well. You win some, you lose some, and I definitely lost this one. The premise (things start going wrong for a guy when his self help audiobook really starts speaking to him in a literal sense) seemed so good and so potentially fun. I guess I did like the quip-heavy writing style and the satirical feel, but it got nothing out of me emotionally, the twists and turns weren't that interesting, and I ended up feeling a bit bored by it all. Listened to the audiobook as read by Wil Wheaton and Ron Perlman, and it was definitely well performed, as a lot of these straight-to-audio productions are. Just didn't end up being as interesting as I thought. Ah well!

Content warnings: death, blood, gore

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love Ben Winters books. He's thoughtful without using big words. He's procedural without feeling hack. He's sf without really feeling like a genre book.

I used to love wil Wheaton. I don't care one way or the other about Ron Perlman. But he is definitely the highlight of this audiobook. I love how his voice is 1980s schlock and combined with the boy Wils voice, is a nice contrast. The only thing i would say is that the last audiobook i listened to was narrated by Zachary Quinto and it's crazy but it's so obvious listening to them next to each other that ZQ is a way better narrator, voice actor, and maybe all over actor. Which makes me a little sad.

[Bookfairy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ok, this was a cute story. Light-hearted horror, probably my favorite kind, there's creepy stuff happening, but there's some humor, you can see characters getting sucked into bad situations, but you don't get sucked in enough to be *truly* afraid for anyone. If it weren't funny it might be scarier, but it's a fun ride as it is.

[Allison · Rating 5 out of 5]

The narration of this audio-only novella brings the story to life, with the dueling talents of Wil Wheaton and Ron Perlman--Wheaton as narrator/protagonist, and Perlman in a very meta role as an audiobook narrator. Fun, fast, and worth the listen, especially for audiobook aficionados.

[Stephen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I knew I was right not to trust self help books.

This book is more comic than I expected from the other books by Ben Winters that I've read. In many ways it feels almost but not quite like a John Scalzi story--of course that is in part because I listened to the audiobook which was read by frequent narrator of Scalzi audiobooks, Wil Wheaton (with Ron Perlman as the narrator of the self help audiobook within the audiobook).

[Allison · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's an audiobook within an audiobook.

Me: We should have downloaded an audiobook
Husband: hang on. Let me see.
[starts playing audiobook]
After awhile...
Me: this is entertaining. where did you hear about this?
Husband: I don't know. I just seemed to have it but didn't remember downloading it
Me: !?

It kept me entertained on a long car ride. I liked how whenever the Killer Instinct "audiobook" played, they had a little drumroll going in the background.

[Jorid Sørli · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this because it was free on audible. I really liled the reading, the sound effects very good and moved the story along nicely.

[John · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 rounded down for an only so-so story that was well narrated and did have some interesting spots.

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely ridiculous but an amusing book.

[Alexander Almeida · Rating 3 out of 5]

sempre acho incrível como conseguem fazer uma história tão curta, tão entediante

[Scott S. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh if I'm being generous. Audible Original is becoming synonymous with mediocrity in my mind.

Wheaton's narration couldn't save this one.

Minus 47 stars for a positive mention of the book White Fragility.

[Jason Furman · Rating 3 out of 5]

A short Audible-only novella by Ben Winters (author of the excellent The Last Policeman trilogy). It tells what seems like a fantastic story about a failed actor making a living as a deliveryman who downloads an app with a motivational book by a second-rate has been action star. The book starts to give him advice on how to take control of his own life and become more assertive, all of which spins wildly out of control. Eventually it is all tied together in a non-fantastical and reasonably satisfying conclusion. Well worth what I paid for it (free on Audible) and the short amount of time.

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn’t put it away, because I had 4 hours to kill and it was free.

[Heather R · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fast-paced, quirky, humorous action-adventure set in LA. Our protagonist is kind of a “loser” (he works for a food delivery service and acts on the side. Well, he auditions. Occasionally. Our hero does not have it going on). Then he discovers a particularly intense/compelling audio book, which becomes a major plot point. As an audiophile, this very much worked for me. Loved the pacing, characters, and the action-movie-style one-liners. Plus, the narration was outstanding. Come on, Wil Wheaton AND Ron Perlman!? *chef’s kiss* A dream team! My only critique: if only it was a longer story and/or there was a sequel. This is a fun one!

[John Hammond · Rating 4 out of 5]

I kept getting this annoying pop up ad on my audiobook platform telling me about this self help book. Although it didn’t flash or flicker, or have any headshots of Hector Bruno, but it did pester me to download it. So I finally did. And I found The Killer Instinct.

It was an enjoyable book, but maybe ironically poking fun at audible for its pop up ads for a story about an evil audiobook delivered by annoying pop up ads. Short and fun, in a murder and “oh no, what have a done” kind of way.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I wanted a short audiobook to catch up with my reading challenge for the year because I started falling behind. This one sounded interesting, so I gave it a try. I'm glad I did, because it was enjoyable! While it matched the summary, there was so much more to it that I didn't expect, especially when it only clocked in at about four hours long.

For one thing, I absolutely LOVED the way it was presented! The narrators were perfect! Every single line they read they said with passion. You could tell they enjoyed reading it and gave every character a different personality. Every time the audiobook Jack listened to would play, it would play a jaunty little tune and give Hector's voice an echoing tone so you could keep track of who was saying what line. It was extremely creative and I loved listening to every second of it. There was a surprising amount of humor in the story as well, all of which was well placed and didn't feel forced. My personal favorite moments involved Jack's conversation with a cop and his first conversation with a character named Iris.

I loved the character of Jack which, considering what happened to him throughout the story, wasn't something I expected. This definitely has something to do with the excellent narration, but it also has something to do with him as a character. While he made many mistakes and was both a protagonist and antagonist, I couldn't help but love him and relate to him in a way. There were moments in my life where I felt like I was being stepped on and couldn't get out of the rut I was stuck in. While I didn't do anything nearly as bad as Jack did throughout the story, I still felt bad for him, even when he was making the wrong choices. Despite that antagonistic side, I was still rooting for him and enjoyed following his story. It's crazy to me because characters with this kind of setup usually bother me and have some scenes that are cringe-worthy. With Jack, though, those cringy moments were due to me seeing him make those bad decisions and hoping he would come out of things okay and on the right side again.

The main reason I'm giving this book four stars rather than five was the ending. It had such a great premise, a cool idea, and great characters, but the ending fell flat for me. No spoilers here, but after the previously mentioned character named Iris comes into play, things start to go in reverse and end in a way I found less than thrilling. Iris herself was fine to begin with (hence my love for her first conversation with Jack), but she does tend to drag the story a bit after he meets her. Thankfully, the narrators didn't give up and managed to read everything in the same lively manner, so I couldn't put them at fault. The storyline was like a speeding car that had to slam on its brakes after almost missing a red light.

Despite the less than stellar ending, I still suggest this for people who want a quick audiobook to help them pass the time. It has some of the best narrators I've heard so far and a fun story that will keep your attention.

[Stephen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jack Diller is a loser in denial, a failed actor who keeps the bills paid (barely) by delivering food to Los Angeles’ upper middle classes, staring in awe at their mansions while trying not to think about the tiny rental house filled with old pizza boxes and empty Mountain Dew cans that waits for him after twelve hours of driving. Jerry spends much of his shift staring at his phone, and one night sees an obnoxious ad for an audiobook. It’s a self-help book by Hector Bruno, an action movie star from the 1980s. Although Jack isn’t much for audiobooks, out of curiosity he gives it a shot, and……finds Hector talking to him. Jack’s not just listening to a washed-up actor give vague life advice, he’s being confronted and coached by a man with such an audio presence that he can’t help but listen — and as Jack does, he finds something rising in him: THE KILLER INSTINCT. The polite pushover finds a sudden and inexplicable fount of self-confidence and cunning, and is soon well off the straight and narrow, culminating in a flight to the desert with a young hostage. (Not to worry, Iris, Jack’s really a nice guy. Really. ) 

Self Help made me hurt with laughter, though it helps that I’ve been in bed for several days with a savage chest cold so any amount of laughter hurts a bit. The voice acting in this is utterly brilliant, and I’m sorry that there’s no excerpt on YouTube to share, and that the ‘sample’ on Audible only demonstrates Wil Wheaton’s performance, and not Ron Perlman. I know Perlman chiefly through his role on Sons of Anarchy, where he plays King Claudius in a Hamlet-meets-bike-gang crime drama, and it was hilarious to hear him here, hamming it up with a soundtrack and turning a listless failure into an assertive if bumbling criminal. Wil Wheaton has never disappointed me in his audio performances — he is, in fact, the reason I’m an Audible member at all – and he’s up to his usual standards here. Although there’s some interest from the reader/listener wondering what the nature of the audiobook is (is Jack hallucinating? Is it some some of AI?), given that it appears to be conscious and reacts to Jack’s real-world choices, the meat is Wheaton’s delivery of a man-child discovering how to assert himself and move toward a goal, but quickly going off the rails and rationalizing all along the way. It’s dark, funny, sometimes surreal, and always thoroughly entertaining.