Comtemplating Adultery : The Secret Life of a Victorian Woman

by Joseph; Hamburger Hamburger, Joseph Hamburger

What began as a light-hearted postal flirtation between Sarah Austin and German Prince Hermann Puckler Muskau exploded into an illicit and sexually explicit epistolary love affair. The story of this real-life relationship--which was never to come to fruition--dramatized, as few book have, the power of sexual fantasy and emotional need and the truth about the Victorian era. 4-page black-and-white photograph insert.

Genres: Biography, Nonfiction

314 pages, Paperback

First published July 30, 1991

Reviews

[Brenda Clough · Rating 4 out of 5]

An all too common dilemma for Victorian women. If you're stuck married to a creep, what can be done in an era with no divorce? One solution is to find an emotional outlet on the page, writing racy letters to some guy who's safely far away. The authors found a trove of these letters and supply the background so that we can get a good glimpse into the mind of a frustrated woman of the period.

[Courtney · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book description makes this book sound like a haunting tale of a fallen woman, but it is exactly as the title says, "Contemplating Adultery" The authors follow the letters of Sarah Austin and a German prince she has never met. In their letters they confide in one another and she alludes to the unhappiness in her marriage.
The one aspect that was eye opening is how much women in the Victorian era had to deal with. Austin was expected to take care of her home, good for nothing husband, daughter, and provide income. It was no wonder that she looked for love elsewhere.
From a modern viewpoint it is hard to see what she did as scandalous, but it is indeed that. The discovery of these letters would have ruined her reputation and that of her family.
The authors did very well at organizing the book, It was also written in a narrative vein that really helped it to flow. This book was enjoyable as well as informative. I recommend it to anyone who is interested in Historical Women's studies.

[Lisbeth · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a fascinating account of the mind and thoughts of a middle-class Victorian lady. Living in a loveless marriage might have contributed to her fascination and love for a man, prince and romantic adventurer, which she had never met. I could not help thinking the couple was very much ahead of their time; a sort of online dating. They wrote physical letters, today we write online. But, with the correspondence, they really got to know each other. That is if they were true to what they wrote.

The story of how these long-lost letters were found is also interesting. In short, they belonged to the Varnagen collection. During World War II, officials at the German State Library in Berlin moved manuscripts and other documents to a Benedictine monastery in Silesia. This area was ceded to Poland in the postwar settlement. The collection was considered as a war loss until in the 1980s archivists became aware that the collection was kept in the Jagiellonian University at Cracow.

And then of course... How could I not read a book having as cover The Day Dream by Dante Gabriel Rosetti? (My edition has that cover)

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting book about an unhappy marriage and a very innovative early Victorian woman seeking passion in her life.

[Judy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not totally worth the odd looks on the metro - it's a bit disjointed, but an interesting perspective.

[Mary Beth · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting perspective on married Victorian women. Focuses on one who did not have such a great marriage.

[Meagan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this! It painted such a real and distinct portrait of a Victorian woman that was so different from what we're taught to believe about them.

[Alivia · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was actually a re-read as I'm going through my collection to downsize a little bit. I might end up keeping this one after all - it's very readable for an academic work, fairly short, and quite interesting. Sarah Austin reminds me of the heroine of "Middlemarch" - she marries a man she believes will become a hero to mankind through his scholarly efforts, intending to be his helpmeet, but he turns out to be melancholy, reclusive, and in very poor health mentally and physically. He abandons all his ambitions one by one and ruins every chance at employment he is given. She quickly becomes disillusioned but remains entirely committed to taking care of him, eventually becoming a nurse rather than an equal partner and lover. Small wonder she engaged in a passionate love affair through the medium of letters with a rakish, sensual German prince!
I disagree with another reviewer that she only "contemplated" adultery. She exchanged love tokens and detailed fantasies with Hermann and certainly had an emotional affair, even if it never reached the physical realm. However, stuck as she was in a miserable marriage that would have been impossible legally and socially to dissolve through divorce, her actions are understandable. (Although she put a bit too much naive faith in a man known to be reckless and petty!) I wish she had been afforded the freedoms that nowadays we often take for granted.

[T.E. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Completely fascinating

[Brooke]

I’m not really sure why I read this other than it was free at a yard sale. Honestly, I’m surprised I finished it. There were some interesting bits, but mostly it was just boring.

[Joyce · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book wasn't very good but I added it to counter balance the book on Ryan Roy's list.