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Rescuing Wayward Children
This book is an essential resource for parents, teachers and leaders of our youth.
First published March 28, 2009
19 people are currently reading
65 people want to read
About the author
Larry Barkdull
53 books6 followersI am a longtime publisher and writer of books, music, art and magazines. My most recent books are Priesthood Power–Blessing the Sick and the Afflicted and Rescuing Wayward Children. I have just completed a major 5-book doctrinal series called The Three Pillars of Zion, which was announced August 2009. I have created two Facebook groups called, “Rescuing Wayward Children” and “Three Pillars of Zion–Becoming a Zion Person.”
For nine years, I owned Sonos Music Resources and published the Tabernacle Choir Performance Library, and I was also the owner and publisher of Keepsake Books. Combined, I have published about 600 products for numerous authors, composers and artists. I founded two non-profit organizations: The Latter-day Foundation for the Arts, Education and Humanity (to promote LDS arts), and Gospel Ideals International (to promote the gospel of Jesus Christ on the Internet). My wife, Elizabeth (Buffie), and I have been married for 38 years we have ten children and 15 grandchildren. We live in Orem, Utah. Visit me on Facebook: “Larry Barkdull”
from http://www.larrybarkdull.com/about-me
For nine years, I owned Sonos Music Resources and published the Tabernacle Choir Performance Library, and I was also the owner and publisher of Keepsake Books. Combined, I have published about 600 products for numerous authors, composers and artists. I founded two non-profit organizations: The Latter-day Foundation for the Arts, Education and Humanity (to promote LDS arts), and Gospel Ideals International (to promote the gospel of Jesus Christ on the Internet). My wife, Elizabeth (Buffie), and I have been married for 38 years we have ten children and 15 grandchildren. We live in Orem, Utah. Visit me on Facebook: “Larry Barkdull”
from http://www.larrybarkdull.com/about-me
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
April 19, 2012
"Rescuing Wayward Children" by Larry Barkdull is great gospel resource material for everyone, not just parents struggling to know what they should do for their children who have lost their way. We are taught about personal sanctification as a means to help redeem our children (and ourselves). This is a book I will use often.
July 19, 2011
This book was packed with doctrine, comfort, motivation, and a reminder of the atoning love of our Savior. I took a break from it during a busy time and having now finished it, I will be keeping it nearby as a reference.
June 14, 2013
As a parent of LDS kids, this book really changed my perspective on my role and responsibilities. It as very inspiring, filled with messages of hope, and really helped me to view my job as a parent as a partnership with The Lord, rather than a solo exercise. I highly recommend it.
April 13, 2011
Excellent book. Gives parents with wayward children much hope. I will read it again and again.
March 19, 2013
Amazingly powerful in more ways than I can recount. Incredibly wonderful book. I cannot recommend it strongly enough!
January 11, 2017
Honestly, this is the best book I have ever read.
January 18, 2013
Edit on 17 January 2013: If you feel inclined to read this book, go ahead and do so. I just finished reading The Conscious Parent by Shefali Tsabary, PhD and found that it was infinitely more insightful and beneficial in understanding behavior and how to deal with it than Rescuing Wayward Children was.
This was an interesting book. I couldn't decide if I should give it 2 or 3 stars. Seeing how in my opinion, it was just OK, I gave it 2. Maybe I'll come back later after some additional reflection and give it a 3.
** Things that I enjoyed about this book. **
Rescuing Wayward Children does its best to condense LDS theology and scripture into a compact, faith-promoting, and inspiring book. The author, Larry Barkdull, has included dozens of personal stories from parents who have wayward children, quotations from general authorities and respected people in LDS culture. Many of those quotes are helpful and inspiring. Without a doubt the book is designed to inspire faith in God and in Christ's Atonement. I would definitely say it does this as it's a central reoccurring theme throughout the book. If you've ever wanted to understand the Atonement and how it may affect your wayward children, I would recommend this book.
The many quotations used in this book are faith-promoting (mostly) and help calm a frazzled heart. Many of the included quotations can help to restore hope and love for those you feel are wayward and amongst your own family.
I think it's important to bring out that Larry reminds parents that God has a plan for each of HIs children and to place trust in that God. He also reminds us repeatedly that a parent's covenants are much more powerful than we can imagine—powerful enough (under certain circumstances and conditions) to bring back your wayward child into the faith.
Larry had multiple parents from different states (mostly Utah and Idaho) share their stories of how they've been working with their wayward children. These parents share their feelings, dos, and don'ts. For the most part, these stories are helpful. Many of them have children who come back into the church, some of them don't. Most of them were uplifting, some aggravating, all of them were insightful for one reason or another.
** Things that I felt could be improved. **
This is a more difficult section to write because if you're looking into reading this book, chances are you have a wayward child and are looking for a place to turn for peace. This book can do that for you, it really can, but I think you also ought to consider that as well-meaning and intentioned as this book is, it also contains some rather serious shortcomings, in my opinion.
I think that perhaps the biggest shortcoming in this book is how the author and the stories contained therein always (literally) equate someone leaving the church with the desire to sin, rebellion, or that person having sin for which they have yet to repent. This is a common mentality within all religions, not just LDS which is grossly misunderstood. It doesn't take into account that a person may have left the fold because they could not reconcile some of the doctrines or extremely controversial church history. Many of these people are still very good people. The only difference is that their beliefs have changed. In the majority of examples given in the book, the wayward children were drug-users, Alma the Younger-style sinners. I find it prejudice and unfair to assume that all people who leave do so because they find Alma the Younger a great role model.
There were some areas of the book that were more difficult to read, including some of the quotations and real-life experiences, because they promoted an "I am (we are) the victim(s)" mentality. I understand that when someone you love leaves the church, it's easy to feel like you are the victim and that "they (the wayward child) did this to me." Who knows, maybe in some cases you really are, but I feel it's a major failing in this book that it doesn't give more emphasis to things just being "as they are." In many instances you are just feeling the affects of the child leaving which can be mistaken for a personal attack. Sometimes when someone leaves it's just as painful for that person who left as it is for the parent. If this book considers that opinion, I missed it as I felt the underlying tones (it doesn't say it directly) of the stories and content indirectly promoted the victim mentality.
I also felt that this book, especially towards the beginning, promoted a heavy "us vs. them" mentality, "us" being members of the church and "them" being those outside the church including the wayward children. I personally feel this type of thinking is damaging and even slightly offensive. There are good people everywhere, and that's something as members that we often overlook. Some of the wayward children are among those good people. As part of this, I felt like the book promoted elitism. Those who are in the church and doing well are the chosen few and it's up to them to save the entire world (1 member for every 7,000+ people). Unfortunately your wayward child was a chosen one, but he or she fell short... so add another number to that 7,000+.
Numbers aside, parents are reminded throughout the entire book that if their child is going to be saved, it's up to them: they must have more love, more righteousness, dedicate themselves even more to the church, attend the temple twice a week, sacrifice more, be more obedient, extra righteous, and extra diligent. As a parent you must now pray more, read your scriptures more, and fast more. Phew! Is that a heavy burden or what? These are the same things that have caused others to tucker out and eventually leave the church themselves. A person can only give so much. Many parents are already giving their all. Because of this, I felt this book at times was overwhelming and somewhat discouraging, despite the make-you-feel-good quotations and scriptures. Most of the times these solutions are given in an uplifting way, but I feel in general that it places an unfair burden on the parents.
I've already slightly addressed this above, but I feel so strongly about it, that I want to bring it up again. This book really does place a heavy burden on a parent's shoulders, and while doing so it fails to address one of the biggest things of all: trying to understand your children. There were a couple stories in the book that alluded to doing that, but there was no special emphasis placed on it. It assumes under all costs that the parents are right, that Larry is right. This above all else in my opinion is the book's biggest downfall. It doesn't consider that the child may have valid reasons—yes, valid—for leaving the church. I emphasize valid because as the parent of a wayward child and as a very true believing member, you may feel that there are no valid reasons for leaving the church, but to your child their doubts and concerns are real. Don't underestimate the power of a listening ear—your ear. Stop giving advice, stop lecturing, stop judging. Just listen.
** Summing it up. **
In short, yes, I felt like this book was inspiring and has the potential to bring a lot of parents peace and comfort. There are many quotations from the brethren in it that help a parent realize that their child is not completely lost and that Christ's Atonement is far-reaching and extremely powerful. It emphasizes love and sacrifice (for better and for worse) and faith in God.
Read this book if you are in need of comfort—it will give it to you—but please be careful about internalizing everything in it. I felt like there were a lot of psychologically damaging assumptions and pre-conceived notions and ideas contained therein. It does more to nurse a wounded ego than it does to healthily analyze the situation. The two chapters that I felt were the most rewarding were Chapter 8—Charity Never Faileth, and Chapter 11—Promises to Parents.
This was an interesting book. I couldn't decide if I should give it 2 or 3 stars. Seeing how in my opinion, it was just OK, I gave it 2. Maybe I'll come back later after some additional reflection and give it a 3.
** Things that I enjoyed about this book. **
Rescuing Wayward Children does its best to condense LDS theology and scripture into a compact, faith-promoting, and inspiring book. The author, Larry Barkdull, has included dozens of personal stories from parents who have wayward children, quotations from general authorities and respected people in LDS culture. Many of those quotes are helpful and inspiring. Without a doubt the book is designed to inspire faith in God and in Christ's Atonement. I would definitely say it does this as it's a central reoccurring theme throughout the book. If you've ever wanted to understand the Atonement and how it may affect your wayward children, I would recommend this book.
The many quotations used in this book are faith-promoting (mostly) and help calm a frazzled heart. Many of the included quotations can help to restore hope and love for those you feel are wayward and amongst your own family.
I think it's important to bring out that Larry reminds parents that God has a plan for each of HIs children and to place trust in that God. He also reminds us repeatedly that a parent's covenants are much more powerful than we can imagine—powerful enough (under certain circumstances and conditions) to bring back your wayward child into the faith.
Larry had multiple parents from different states (mostly Utah and Idaho) share their stories of how they've been working with their wayward children. These parents share their feelings, dos, and don'ts. For the most part, these stories are helpful. Many of them have children who come back into the church, some of them don't. Most of them were uplifting, some aggravating, all of them were insightful for one reason or another.
** Things that I felt could be improved. **
This is a more difficult section to write because if you're looking into reading this book, chances are you have a wayward child and are looking for a place to turn for peace. This book can do that for you, it really can, but I think you also ought to consider that as well-meaning and intentioned as this book is, it also contains some rather serious shortcomings, in my opinion.
I think that perhaps the biggest shortcoming in this book is how the author and the stories contained therein always (literally) equate someone leaving the church with the desire to sin, rebellion, or that person having sin for which they have yet to repent. This is a common mentality within all religions, not just LDS which is grossly misunderstood. It doesn't take into account that a person may have left the fold because they could not reconcile some of the doctrines or extremely controversial church history. Many of these people are still very good people. The only difference is that their beliefs have changed. In the majority of examples given in the book, the wayward children were drug-users, Alma the Younger-style sinners. I find it prejudice and unfair to assume that all people who leave do so because they find Alma the Younger a great role model.
There were some areas of the book that were more difficult to read, including some of the quotations and real-life experiences, because they promoted an "I am (we are) the victim(s)" mentality. I understand that when someone you love leaves the church, it's easy to feel like you are the victim and that "they (the wayward child) did this to me." Who knows, maybe in some cases you really are, but I feel it's a major failing in this book that it doesn't give more emphasis to things just being "as they are." In many instances you are just feeling the affects of the child leaving which can be mistaken for a personal attack. Sometimes when someone leaves it's just as painful for that person who left as it is for the parent. If this book considers that opinion, I missed it as I felt the underlying tones (it doesn't say it directly) of the stories and content indirectly promoted the victim mentality.
I also felt that this book, especially towards the beginning, promoted a heavy "us vs. them" mentality, "us" being members of the church and "them" being those outside the church including the wayward children. I personally feel this type of thinking is damaging and even slightly offensive. There are good people everywhere, and that's something as members that we often overlook. Some of the wayward children are among those good people. As part of this, I felt like the book promoted elitism. Those who are in the church and doing well are the chosen few and it's up to them to save the entire world (1 member for every 7,000+ people). Unfortunately your wayward child was a chosen one, but he or she fell short... so add another number to that 7,000+.
Numbers aside, parents are reminded throughout the entire book that if their child is going to be saved, it's up to them: they must have more love, more righteousness, dedicate themselves even more to the church, attend the temple twice a week, sacrifice more, be more obedient, extra righteous, and extra diligent. As a parent you must now pray more, read your scriptures more, and fast more. Phew! Is that a heavy burden or what? These are the same things that have caused others to tucker out and eventually leave the church themselves. A person can only give so much. Many parents are already giving their all. Because of this, I felt this book at times was overwhelming and somewhat discouraging, despite the make-you-feel-good quotations and scriptures. Most of the times these solutions are given in an uplifting way, but I feel in general that it places an unfair burden on the parents.
I've already slightly addressed this above, but I feel so strongly about it, that I want to bring it up again. This book really does place a heavy burden on a parent's shoulders, and while doing so it fails to address one of the biggest things of all: trying to understand your children. There were a couple stories in the book that alluded to doing that, but there was no special emphasis placed on it. It assumes under all costs that the parents are right, that Larry is right. This above all else in my opinion is the book's biggest downfall. It doesn't consider that the child may have valid reasons—yes, valid—for leaving the church. I emphasize valid because as the parent of a wayward child and as a very true believing member, you may feel that there are no valid reasons for leaving the church, but to your child their doubts and concerns are real. Don't underestimate the power of a listening ear—your ear. Stop giving advice, stop lecturing, stop judging. Just listen.
** Summing it up. **
In short, yes, I felt like this book was inspiring and has the potential to bring a lot of parents peace and comfort. There are many quotations from the brethren in it that help a parent realize that their child is not completely lost and that Christ's Atonement is far-reaching and extremely powerful. It emphasizes love and sacrifice (for better and for worse) and faith in God.
Read this book if you are in need of comfort—it will give it to you—but please be careful about internalizing everything in it. I felt like there were a lot of psychologically damaging assumptions and pre-conceived notions and ideas contained therein. It does more to nurse a wounded ego than it does to healthily analyze the situation. The two chapters that I felt were the most rewarding were Chapter 8—Charity Never Faileth, and Chapter 11—Promises to Parents.
January 21, 2020
This is one of the most Hope-filled, and faith inspiring books I’ve ever read. I highly recommend this book for anyone who has friends or loved ones who may be struggling. But I still recommend it to those who may not as well. This was a very in depth look at what the Gospel teaches us about Jesus Christ and His power to save.
October 9, 2018
Great book!
Loved all the examples and all the review of teachings, promises and revelations given regarding this subject. Very well presented.
Loved all the examples and all the review of teachings, promises and revelations given regarding this subject. Very well presented.
October 22, 2023
I recommend this book to everyone I come in contact with who struggles with their children. A game changer.
October 20, 2014
This is one of those rare books that I got at the library and then just had to buy. Plus I would love to give one to all my friends. So yeah, it's a keeper. In a word (two): Read it. I've read it twice now and just can't get enough.
I learned more about the gospel, the purpose of our existence and God's plan for mankind and us individually, the temple, and the atonement than I have from any other book besides the scriptures. Even if you do not have a wayward child, chances are there is a loved one in your life and/or you are in a leadership position where you are in a position of influence with someone who is straying from God's paths. As a parent it brings me great comfort to know that I am in a unique position of influence with my children and am a partner with God in helping Him aid my children on their journey home.
This book is full of wonderful and comforting doctrine and personal stories. God has not forgotten and will never forget a single one of His children. And He will never, no never, no never! give up on any of them. This is a great lesson and example for all of us to follow.
I learned more about the gospel, the purpose of our existence and God's plan for mankind and us individually, the temple, and the atonement than I have from any other book besides the scriptures. Even if you do not have a wayward child, chances are there is a loved one in your life and/or you are in a leadership position where you are in a position of influence with someone who is straying from God's paths. As a parent it brings me great comfort to know that I am in a unique position of influence with my children and am a partner with God in helping Him aid my children on their journey home.
This book is full of wonderful and comforting doctrine and personal stories. God has not forgotten and will never forget a single one of His children. And He will never, no never, no never! give up on any of them. This is a great lesson and example for all of us to follow.
February 1, 2019
This is a very comforting book, one that I have often lent to others and given away copies of. It's based on the teachings of LDS prophets and apostles, so Latter-day Saints will find it reliable. I highly recommend it to anyone who who has children who have left the Church or knows others who have.
August 31, 2022
I learned that the best thing I can do is to live the Gospel. This book is packed with doctrinal explanations of what we need to do to become more christlike. As with any parenting book, it has examples of how that has played out in the lives of others. Those were typically not the magic instant cure, but are examples of the effect of living the Gospel of Jesus Christ themselves.
December 3, 2016
The beginning of this is really good, I like that the doctrinal pieces Barkdull puts together align with some of the thoughts I have had on this topic. Towards the end it starts to get slow. I think because the overall message is hard to take: be better. Still a great resource though I wouldn't use it to teach in church.
June 26, 2009
This book gives hope to parents and leaders of children who have gone astray. I am enjoying this book, even though I am not in this situation it is helping me to see where I can do better as a parent. One of the best books on this subject, it will bring hope.
March 21, 2011
One of the best books I have ever read.
November 9, 2009
This book has something for everyone. It is about living the gospel not just for people who have gone astray. It gives a lot of hope if you have someone who is lost though.
March 29, 2013
I was impressed with the great stories. I loved that the advice is what all of these books say; "Just love them and let God change them", but with a different perspective and new stories.
May 9, 2016
I really liked the main thesis of the book- redemption leads to redemption. It's an idea I have long used to interpret the Atonement and I was excited to hear someone else put it into words.
January 18, 2023
What a great perspective on the gospel! It really opened my eyes to real hope. This is a book I will revisit time and time again when I need to shift my mind from despair to faith.
April 30, 2016
Recommended as a book on the atonement and how we can further the work of salvation.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews