Uneven

by Anah Crow

Rase Illion is a middle-aged captain of industry, a restrained man with a spotless reputation just emerging from the shadow of his vicious, driven father. Since his father's death, Rase has been living like the old man was still alive, keeping up appearances with his trophy wife and appropriately luxurious house. Which is when Rase meets Gabriel.

Gabriel loses his temper during his first meeting with Rase and lashes out, which unleashes Rase's carefully hidden submissive and masochistic tendencies. His encounter with Gabriel snaps Rase out of his sleepwalking life, and he sets about remaking his world in his own way. Rase isn't the only one shaken by their encounter, though. Can he convince Gabriel to give their relationship a chance?

Genres: BDSM, M M Romance, Contemporary, Romance, Erotica, Dark, Gay

222 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 2008

About the author

Under Construction!

F.A.Q.

Do you want to participate in Generic_Author_Event?

Drop me a line, please! If you're looking for a book for donation or a blog post from me, I'm usually cool with that.

Are you going to write a sequel to Some_Book_You_Wrote?

The up front answer is no, unless the book cover indicates that it's part of a series. If there's going to be a sequel to a book, you'll know once I've signed the contract.

Who is this Dianne person?

Only the light of my life and all that rot. She e-sides here: http://www.foxwrites.com/ Without her, you wouldn't see much from me at all, not even the books that don't have her name on the cover.

Do you read your email?

All the time. I think the question you want is do I answer my email? Occasionally. Badly. I'm a terrible, terrible emailer.

You're reading X books at once?!

Only occasionally at once. I can read two books at the same time, but I get dizzy. Mostly, I just switch books depending on my mood. It's unusual for me to have less than four on the go at a time.

Do you read reviews of your books?

No, sorry! I'm here, yes, but I prefer not to read reviews (no matter how lovely they are) because once a book has left my hands and is available to the readers, my relationship to it changes. It's all grown up. :) I have a clutter of booklings to nurture so they will join the others on your shelves.

Will you read/review my book?

Sorry, but no. There are a number of reasons for this but the biggest is—I suck at doing these things. I'm a horrible procrastinator. I get wound up and then blank out what I'm supposed to do. My ADHD goes galumphing through my head like a bull in a china shop, wrecking everything.

I'm a writer and you hated/loved my book!

I'm sure you're a lovely person, either way. Please have one or both of: "I'm sorry!" or "You're welcome!"

Can I be excused now?

Of course you can! Thanks for reading.

Reviews

[Danny Tyran · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Most m/m BDSM fiction sucks, let's be blunt. It's written by people with no knowledge of the lifestyle, and with no understanding of the mentality, the drives, the urges. It's aimed at heterosexuals who think being tied up with scarves and spanked is the height of naughtiness, and who would pass out if they actually saw a hard core scene or some of the more explicit BDSM pornography. The authors don't really get what drives people who are into BDSM, but that's okay - neither does their audience.

Anah Crow isn't cut from that cloth, and Uneven is not a book for people who want to be lightly titillated. It's raw, bare, brutal - gut wrenching. It's possibly one of the most powerful, honest books I've ever read on any subject.

But it's also beautiful, and romantic, and sweet. I don't know how she manages that when one protagonist belts the other one across the face on their first meeting, and it only gets more violent from then on.

Actually, I do know. Because she understands Rase and Gabriel, and knows that their love and their desires need the violence, the pain and the humiliation. She shows that from the inside, so we get why Rase needs this so much. Why it's been such a scorching pain for him to have suppressed this for all his adult life - even more than the pain of suppressing his sexuality to please his domineering father. Rase being gay is nothing compared to Rase being a submissive masochist, and the hunger he feels is driving him to an early grave. Until he meets Gabriel, a sadistic dom with a chip on his shoulder and a murky past, who's mesmerised and terrified by Rase's need and his utter submission. You feel the terror, the screaming need in both men, and understand why they have to do what they do, and why it's actually healthy and good that they do it.

You understand it because Anah Crow is an astonishing good and powerful writer. She makes this very difficult, this almost ugly love affair, spring to life, makes you sympathise and understand and yearn along with Rase and Gabriel. Writers this good are rare. Writers tackling a subject this tough, are even more special and unusual.

This is not an easy book to read, especially if you're used to the pap most writers turn out when they write about BDSM. I've read a lot of frank and explicit material. I wasn't shocked by Uneven - well, not too much, anyway. It's too raw not to shock a little, and that's deliberate, because the author wants to shock you, the way Rase is shocked out of his sleepwalking life.

But once you accept that - and if you can't bring an open mind to this, you may as well not bother buying the book because you'll never get past the disapproval - there is so much to enjoy. Not just Rase and Gabriel's stuttering relationship of intense scenes and long separation as they try and figure out what the hell they're doing, but the other characters. Allen, the devoted factotum and gleeful enabler. Rase's ex-wife who loves him and wants him to be happy, and his son, belatedly reconciled and cheerfully accepting of his father's new identity. Even the realtor is a delight. Rase's headlong tumble into happiness and self-expression is so joyful and enjoyable, and you cheer as he casts off the misery and shackles of parental disapproval, and a path in life that fits him so badly. Not everyone's route to happiness will involve having the s**t beaten out of them on alternate Saturdays, but there's no reason it shouldn't - if it's what you really need. And for Rase, it's exactly right.

I can't say this is a recommended read for the same reason guns make very poor toys for children. A lot of readers will be utterly revolted by this book. Those who aren't, may still not get it. But for those who accept and understand, this is a rare, precious and very beautiful jewel of a book, and to those, I say, buy it now and love it for the wonderful creation it is."
Review by Ann Sommerville in Amazon.com

[Jan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Re-read

*****5 fucked up Stars!*****



For the love of everything kink.

              

WHAT. WAS. THAT.

Do you have any unconventional *cough* deviant sexual behaviour?



Any *cough* kink?
Ageplay? Footplay? Bondage? Sensory deprivation? Master/Slave? Medical Play? Pony Play? Watersports? You name it!
Here,



get in!

The kinks I just mentioned above? you now can delete it from your mind because there is none of them here. I am just trying to make a point: after reading this they all seem a walk in the park.
Does this shite actually happens in RL? or is better saying: Can a dick really get hard with that?
Well, I’ll be honest, I have no idea, but I totally bought it.



What am I fussing about?
Think something heavy on masochism and humiliation. Ready?
Now, streeeetch that comfort zone line just a tad bit more. You might be ready now. Oh! and brace yourself. Just saying...

Slap. Ouch. Spank. Ouch. Busted lip. Ouch. Blood. Ouch. Bruise. Ouch.

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! 

      

I can't exactly wrap my head around this kind of relationship, life style or whatever you want to call it. I normally need to keep telling myself that it's consensual ... and if both insane individuals crave completely opposite urges from one another (one wants to beat the shit out of you, the other wants to be beaten till gets purple) which means they are a perfect match, well, let them be!
That being said, It fascinates me.



In this particular story, I want, I need to give it a lot of credit and praise because I wasn't reading this. I was feeling it.
To read a story where I could actually feel the MC’s ecstasy, rapture, bliss, joy and elation, about a matter/subject that is like a folk tale to me, was mind-blowing.

I mean, this is no ordinary kink. They have no boundaries, no safe words. It's brutal, painful, raw, and violent AND it worked, in an alluring way, to the extent of thinking that I need professional help, a shrink or something.


Hats off to Anah Crow! Where is she he by the way?

A little about the casting:

Rase Illion has been fighting against his own nature his all life. Two failed marriages later (and a son), Rase meets Gabriel. Over a little incident with some handcuffs, Gabriel unleashes something on Rase and sets him free. It was like pressing a reset button. A new Rase version was uploaded.

 
I absolutely loved the new Rase. With his hidden soul now revealed and completely bared, Rase gives himself up to his instincts, long repressed. Open and vulnerable over his deepest feelings, Rase says the most disarming things to Gabriel, with the most candid expression, submissive attitude and sweetest voice. The rush of fear, sadness and shame is completely gone.


Swooooon people!

The other thing that kind of awed me here was the fact that Rase was a masochist/submissive much older than Gabriel - the Dominant. I don't deal with this very well. I've got this barrier and it completely puts me off of reading anything where the Dominant is younger than the submissive. To hell with my conceptions. To hell with my prejudices.
Gabriel was the bomb, powerful and solid as a Dominant character.



Uneven is not really a dark story. It's just unexpectedly brutal. The sex is violent and explosive and if you want to read it, do it with an open mind, otherwise steer clear.
One of the best recommendations I have ever had.

Thanks a million, Cupcake.

 

 

[Lisa Henry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh yes.

At last! A BDSM book where the Dom is younger than the sub, working class, and doesn't belong to some secret swanky BDSM club where everyone falls in True Love and gets collared happily ever after. And the wealthy immaculate captain of industry in this book? Yeah, that's the masochistic wanna-be sub. And about time too!

No safe words and rituals here.
Rase wants to be hurt, and Gabe hurts him.
And they both get what they need out of that.

I am so, so tired of books where good little subs try their hardest to be perfect, and win the ornery master's True Love by submitting. No thanks. More of this please: two people both trying to negotiate a relationship that's based on need, on lust, and on a shifting balance of power.

For what it matters, there's a HEA. But so what? I would have followed this book wherever it took me, because the ride was so much fun.

[nark · Rating 4 out of 5]

✦ listen up my fellow deviants!!!! this was suuuuper hot. hot enough to get four stars from me, despite some things that bugged me. this is definitely not gonna be for everyone, because the mcs are pretty hardcore together.
✦ sadomasochism. handcuffs and belts. breath play. face slapping/punching. humiliation, crawling, shoe licking, name calling. biting, blood and bruises. no safe words, no negotiation. all very consensual.

"what do you want from me?"
"anything you want. i want anything you want to do me. please."

✦ their swoony, tender moments after all the violence hit me right in the feels every single time. i felt like i was riding a rollercoaster.
✦ negatives - not enough information about certain things that happened in the past to the mcs, and their background in general. single POV, i would have loved to have double POV instead. this also didn't really have a satisfying ending, ended more on a HFN.

[Optimist ♰King's Wench♰ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm always wary about rereading things, because what if they don't hold up? But I literally could not find anything else to read that held my attention. I started... let's just call it a stupid number of books, all of them ended a little like this...



I had an itch. A #TeamPain itch that needed scratching and nothing was doing it for me. I'm not sure why quality #TeamPain books are so hard to come by but evidently books that are well written with two (or more) well developed characters who embark on a believable and compelling journey towards HEAsville or even HFNsville is a tall order.

Thankfully this oldie held up. Deliciously painful with intense sadomasochism and two characters who are not only crazy turned on by what they do but by each other was just what the doctor ordered.

I had forgotten how poignant it was, how Crow could throw in a sentence that would level me with its simple yet profound insights. I also had forgotten how sexy this book is. Granted, age gap romance is my jam and I especially like when the sub is the one with more power in the real world. Rase being much older and a titan of industry who is cow towed to by everyone loving nothing more than to be on his knees serving Gabriel is still as potent today as it was when I initially read it 4 yrs ago.



I'd also forgotten how palpably lonely Rase is. By having to hide his sexuality he's unwittingly isolated himself from others, others who care about him and would accept him. But he simply could not chance letting anyone get too close, because he was living a lie, hiding behind a mask. It wasn't until Gabriel ripped that mask off that Rase began really living authentically and in so doing allowed himself to have friends. Those relationships blooming show his growth and evolution and were a joy to read.

The relationship with Gabriel is fraught and though they have an immediate connection coupled with intense sexual compatibility their romance is hard fought, but when it happens it's divine.

The only drawback here is I poured salt in the wound Anah Crow has left by falling off the face of the earth. Man, I miss their writes. Hard.

This certainly is not for everyone but if you're a card carrying member of #TeamPain like me this is a must read (if you can find it, that is).

You know how when you read a book and you have a ‘meh’ feeling or you think ‘that’s nice’ or whatever, then you read a book and you think ‘WOW’ and the next thing you know you’ve finished said book because you couldn’t put it down? That’s what happened to me when I picked up Uneven. I picked it up because I was bored with the other one I'm reading thinking, ‘I’ll just read a chapter or two’ which led to all of the chapters. My status update at 6% was, “Damn… shouldn’t have waited so long to read this.” That's how quickly it happened.

Uneven is unconventional to be sure. I’d be willing to bet there are a large portion of people who will hate it, another that will be repulsed by it, a large contingent that will call it abusive or unhealthy and then a niche group who will think it’s fantastic. I’m in the latter group. Uneven isn’t a fluffy-feel-good read, as a matter of fact it kind of smacks you in the mouth and drags you along behind.

“There didn’t seem to be enough pain in the world for him sometimes.”

Rase is a masochist. A hardcore masochist. He has been for a very long time. When he was much younger his masochism led him to a dungeon and he left said dungeon on a stretcher. Once his father found out not only what happened but that it was another man that inflicted the damage, thereafter Rase was under his father’s thumb. He forced him to marry not once but twice, all while continuing to revile him. Rase was never good enough. That sort of extended neglect and loathing will leave an indelible mark on anyone’s psyche. Rase is no exception. Rase hates his needs-thinks he’s damaged, defective, unworthy, sick which makes his interactions with Gabriel a double edged sword.

“Maybe he just needed reassurance from someone, anyone, that is was okay for him to be like this.”

As many of you know I’m fascinated by BDSM, sadomasochism in particular. I’m not sure I would be interested in trying it but never say never and all that. What fascinates me is what it fulfills in people, why the need it, who are they, what do they do, how did they get there and what their inner musings are about it. Considering our own set of experiences and perspectives add to the patina of the lens through which we view any situation, the permutations all endless. This particular permutation resonated with me for three reasons: (a) I’m a sucker for the oppressed; (b) I especially enjoyed the fact that Gabriel is about half Rase’s age; (c) the power dynamics are well, uneven. Rase has immense wealth whereas Gabriel is floating around from odd job to odd job for now.

“Life was better upside down.”

Gabriel breezes into Rase’s life and turns it upside down with one amazing encounter. It’s funny how one seminal event can turn your whole world on its ear. Uneven is nowhere near BDSM 101. There’s no negotiating, no contract, nothing. Gabriel saw “it” in Rase’s eyes and the game was on. I’m sure if Rase had balked Gabriel would’ve back off. Thankfully, that didn’t happen. Gabriel and Rase give each other precisely what they need which equates to some pretty intense degradation and pain-the perfect symbiosis. It’s purely speculation on my part since Uneven is told entirely through Rase, but I believe Gabriel is struggling with his own needs as well.

Gabriel definitely has baggage but who doesn't. He's hard to read oftentimes, but it's clear he's been hurt by someone. Anyone who goes from being a lawyer to a pool boy has got a story to tell.

Their relationship unfolds over a few months. I wouldn’t categorize it as instalove but instaneed. That need propels them forward. They’re powerless to stop it or stay away from each other. One of the things I liked best was the simplicity of their sadomasochism. I found myself unexpectedly enjoying the lack of St. Andrews crosses, pillories, stocks and the like. It’s just them a belt and some nipple clamps. No intimidating dungeons. No outfits. No titles. It was refreshing and… clean, straightforward.

I fell hard for Rase. He’s a wonderfully complex character. He's rational, steady and absolutely adorable when nervous. Plus he begs so sweetly with his soft voice, on his knees… Jesus… God. *deep breath* After the momentous event, he realizes that he’s been sleepwalking through life and decides to make amends and rid himself of baggage. I was so moved by the fact that all of these people in his life that he’s systematically shuttled to the periphery in his isolation and loneliness, all care deeply for him and are ready and willing to be a part of his life again; funny how numbness can blind you to what’s right in front of you.

“The best thing that can happen to anyone is that they get to be themselves.”

Uneven will not be easy for some to take, but it will make you feel something. This I guarantee. Now, whether it’s something good or something bad is entirely dependent upon your own unique perspective. There are some minor typos which didn’t at all detract from my enjoyment of this book, as if you couldn’t glean that already. And I haven’t even mentioned the sexy times! I… really I have no words. There are so many scenes to choose from; some of the best masturbation scenes I think I’ve ever read.

Glorious.

Beautiful.

“Maybe you should wait.” Gabriel bit Rase’s ear and made him whimper in spite of himself. “I like seeing you hard, I love how wet you get.” Rase almost missed the turn onto his street. “It’s really fucking hot. You have no idea how much it turns me on to watch your cock drip while I’m beating you; I know it hurts and you’re still so hard.”

I think anyone who enjoys BDSM will enjoy Uneven.

[Kat · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fuck yeah! I don't know about you, but Uneven didn't just tick a few of my boxes, it KNOCKED THEM RIGHT OVER.



Enter Rase, a middle-aged captain of industry. A man who oozes power and is immaculately dressed. A man who has the trophy wife, the mansion, and makes people wait just because he can. I suppose he could be your boss? Then one day he walks by when his security team has a young man, who triggered the metal detectors, up against the wall. It's one of his many nameless employees, a stockboy, who forgot to leave his pair of handcuffs at home. Rase decides that the young man can pick them up at the end of his workday. And he does, but before Rase realizes what's happening, he's cuffed. And his lowly employee holds the key.

Please, please let me share a few sentences from Uneven with you. I chopped things up a bit, but think it will give you a fairly good impression of the dynamics between these men.

His mouth was dry, and the ice in his Scotch rang against the crystal like mocking bells. His hand was shaking. Ever so carefully, he reached across himself to set the glass down on the blotter. "I hope you have the key," Rase said.(...) "Always." The emptiness in the man's expression almost brought Rase to despair. Rase held out his free hand, palm up, waiting for the key. "Glad you know what you're doing." (...)
"I know what I'm doing." The stockboy still had a grip on the chain between the cuffs. "That makes one of us."
"I appreciate the demonstration." Out of nowhere, Rase's voice came back and brought with it the rush of anger he'd been waiting for. (...) "It has been very educational. Now, I'd appreciate if you let me go."
"As you wish."(...)
"Thank you, Rase said. He rubbed lightly at his wrists once the cuffs were off. "So", he said, reaching for his Scotch again. "Do I owe you anything for that?" The entire world shifted, and it took Rase a moment to realize that he'd been hit. His mouth tasted like blood.

Can a stockboy, Gabriel, who could have been his son, bring a man who takes over companies worldwide in the blink of an eye, to his knees? THIS alone is so incredibly compelling. Simply because, let's face it, it's usually the other way around. I don't know how many books you've read about strong, older men who dominate young, pretty boys, but I've read quite a few of those! Maybe The Violet and the Tom comes closest in terms of the (misleading) power-imbalance and mutual needs.

Thank god this is not your average BDSM book! I'm sure not everyone will appreciate this book. Some will find it too violent or a bit disturbing even. Personally, I don't enjoy books in which the main characters play by the rules, wisely and coolly discuss hard limits and safewords and respect the restrictions of the game. Uneven is about two men and lust and need so raw, that it blasts out everything that should have mattered.

The sex scenes are intense and balance on the edge of sanity, and perhaps tip over that edge into something undeniably dangerous... That being said, you don't have to be afraid that these two take things uncomfortably far (at least not in my eyes). There is no self-destruction, no downward spirals or terrible angst. Actually, Uneven has its unexpectedly sweet moments! Since both Rase and Gabriel struggle with personal problems, self-acceptance and their feelings for each other, there are quite a few tender, emotional moments involved.

"I never met anyone as naked as you." Gabriel rounded on him, half-furious and half-despairing. "I never met anyone I believed the way I believed you wanted me, wanted what we did." He was back in front of Rase in two strides; he reached out and grabbed a handful of Rase's hair, wrenching Rase's head back and staring down at him. "I fucked you over and you took it like you couldn't get enough."

The hotness of Uneven almost eclipses its flaws, but I will mention a few things to help you know what to expect, and what not. The writing leaves something to be desired. There's simply too much moaning, whining and whimpering going on. When particular words are used so often that I not only start noticing a trend, but also unconsciously begin to count, I think there's room for improvement. Uneven also suffers from the no-pronoun disease (see quote above for a small example). Which isn't too problematic, but could easily have been avoided.

Other than that, and I realize that this is probably a personal pet peeve; what's up with the many solo sex scenes? They absolutely bored me senseless. It's the dynamics between Gabriel and Rase that interest me, I couldn't care less about Rase jerking himself off. I wanted more banter, more danger, MORE one on one time instead!

In general, I'm intrigued by how authors deal with safe sex in the m/m genre. Nowadays, making a point of using condoms seems to be obligatory. Dare I say that in a book like Uneven, condoms have no business? These men play it dark and dirty and actually have unsafe sex during their first encounter. Then why, I wonder, does the author suddenly include condoms during their second tête-à-tête? Besides the fact that it might be just a little too late at that point, it takes me out of the story when it comes to this type of book. I think readers know they shouldn't try out most of the things these men do for fun. When it comes to safe sex, I'm sure they are able to make the distinction between books and real life.

But hey, I could be wrong?

[~✡~Dαni(ela) ♥ ♂♂ love & semi-colons~✡~ · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars

What we get:

-Explosive sadism/masochism (I'm not all up and up on this terminology, but this seemed way beyond BDSM and Dom/sub. There were no scenes, no safe words, no contracts, just lots of violent/painful sex involving beatings, blood, biting, crawling, shoe licking, and oxygen deprivation.)
-A rollercoaster of shame, guilt, anger
-A May-December "romance" (I have to use that term loosely) between Rase, a 40-something-year-old, uber-successful, super-rich CEO of some kind of company that involves factories and business deals, and Gabriel, a 20-something-year-old "stockboy" with a past
-Two very damaged MCs (although the damage is only vaguely discussed)
-Plethora of typos (mostly missing/wrong prepositions)

What we don't get:

-Romance
-Tenderness (very little, anyway, and only following scenes of violence)
-Love
-HEA
-Background development
-Relationship development

I knew what I was getting into with this book. I read many friends' reviews that laid the violence out there, and even though that isn't exactly my cuppa, I don't mind pushing boundaries. Even so, this one was really lacking in the romance department.

The two MCs barely talked. Because the story is told from Rase's perspective, Gabriel is an enigma, and not in a good way. We get foggy glimpses of his background, but it's barely sketched in; if you squint, you may see the edges but not much else. As such, I didn't understand why Gabriel needed to inflict pain, why he was so moody and bitchy and kind of nasty at times.

Rase, on the other hand, makes so many changes in his life, so damn fast, I didn't believe his motivations AT ALL. I don't think ONE encounter can create such a steep epiphany. His background is also not fully fleshed out (why was he in the closet exactly?)

I also didn't see the sex connection translating into real life; what else did these guys really have in common? How do you make something like this work in the long-term? I'm not sure Crow knows either, because she left the ending very vague, a mild HFN.

I did like Allen (Rase's assistant). I kind of want to read his story. He was charming and sweet, and made me smile.

[Gigi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Re-read in February 2014: Loved it even more the second time around. Highly, highly recommended for M/M romance fans of damaged heroes who like their sex naughty. And of COURSE it has a HEA!

Original review: Wow, after reading all the reviews here and hearing how harsh the BDSM was in this book, I didn't even think I was going to be able to get through this entire book. Surprisingly, I absolutely loved it! The connection between the MCs was fabulous! The BDSM was intense and bloody, but necessary. And really quite hot! I'm off to dig through Anah Crow's book list for more off her stuff. Highly recommended for fans of hardcore BDSM with a nice splash of romance.

[JenMcJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hmmm, how to review this one? This is not your mothers BDSM novel.

This story while sweet and tender at times was just as often fierce and edgy. No whips and gags and safewords, just fists and handcuffs and leather belts. No pretty stripes from the cane, but facial bruises and busted lips. Yes, this story is elementally brutal.

All that and yet it encompasses so much more. Along with the erotic beatings that Rase begs for there is an aching tenderness from Gabriel in the aftermath. There is a family that heals and two men that find they need each other to relate to the world around them with basic humanity. This eventually sets them free to embrace the sadomasochistic needs they both have, in different ways. These are not tepid leanings; these are ferocious base needs, not unlike oxygen to breath.

The story itself is very good, I have a little issue with the way Gabriel treats Rase the first time they meet in his office and I feel like I should have cringed at the brutality, but in truth, I didn't. I watched it fascinated. I could not relate to these needs at all, but that utterly absorbed me. The story would have been improved with some POV from Gabriel. This is strictly one POV, Rase. Getting inside Gabriel's head may have made this story even stronger.

This is not for the faint of heart but is well worth read if you pick it

[Dia · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 solid stars!

I really enjoyed this book. I love books that challenge my imagination and this one was pretty scary at times. I think it's the cruelest BDSM book I've read, but I can totally understand that there are people who want/need to feel pain and they find pleasure in this.

I liked Gabriel. He was so misterious and also incredible calm and sweet. He had in him the roughtness but also the tenderness.

I am only sorry that the end was abrupt. I wanted much more. Maybe more scenes with the two of them out of the bedroom. The restaurant scene wasn't enough for me. Maybe an epilogue would have given me the closure I needed. It's the only reason I am not rating it with 5 stars.

[Moony Eliver · Rating 3 out of 5]

Scorching! My 3-star rating probably belies how much I enjoyed this one, so don’t let it keep you away if you like your kink heavy on the SM. I recommend it, even though there was a lot that could have been better.

The strengths here were the story arc and the connection between the MCs. I was looking for some smut with heart, and this one delivered in spades. Both the smut and the heart were palpably yummy.

The weaknesses were the dialogue and the lack of development outside the relationship. The latter wouldn’t have been as much of an issue if less had been bitten off by the author — elements of Rase’s and Gabriel's lives were included that didn’t strictly need to be, and then they weren’t really fleshed out.

Every once in a while, my jaw would drop because of a moment of brilliance. It’s very much worth reading; just don’t expect the tightness of a well-edited story.

[Natalia · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars
Loved this one!

[Joseph Tonlet · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just all kinds of fucking twisted awesomeness! Absolutely LOVED it! Want more - a second book - in the worst damn way.

[Vivian ♪(┌・。・)┌ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just as a forewarning, I apologise for my ineloquence and relatively uninspiring review. I'm not feel the reviewing vibes but I really want to get this out of mind (I know, a fabulous attitude). It kind of feels like I'm having a midlife crisis actually. Without the 'midlife' part.

I started off thinking this would be a wham-bam-thank-you kind of review, but it seems to have turned out different. Must be the power of Uneven.





I adore this book (I feel the need to state this just in case you didn't notice I tagged it under my 'adored' shelf). It was, as everyone has probably said thrice over in their reviews, intense and raw and brutal and any other word thesaurus.com can offer. I know some people may find this a rather dark read (I've long crossed over to the dark side. The cookies must be why I've gained weight. Oh wait, no, that's called aging. Hah.) however if you manage to look past the brutally hot sex, it really is a beautiful and poignant story and a stunning read.

There was once a man who felt as lost as a little boy. Maybe he liked things 'normal' people didn't like, maybe he liked things 'normal' people shouldn't like and don't like. So maybe he wasn't 'normal', and maybe that added a heavy load to his shoulders. But the point is that because he wasn't normal, and people have to be normal, he felt that he wasn't just abnormal: he was Bad. Wrong.

You see, Uneven isn't just some simply a hardcore, raunchy BDSM story. There are people in this world who have sadomasochistic desires-- it isn't something that was made up for the sole purpose of pornography and erotic literature. Being a practitioner of BDSM isn't something you'd advertise, as widely as 50 Shades of Grey has managed to pollute this world, for obvious reasons as it isn't considered 'normal'. As with homosexuality. So reading about Rase's shame, his inability to accept his desires and effectively, himself, is particularly heartbreaking. Not just because as a reader you become emotionally invested in the hero, but also because we've all felt, at one time or another, that we weren't normal, or we didn't belong, or that we couldn't share desires and thoughts because they weren't socially accepted. And though this isn't exactly the plot, as the book progresses we watch the two slowly begin to accept each other and themselves and that in itself is incredibly beautiful and heart warming. And of course, to see two favoured I've-been-fucked-over-by-life-no-make-that-thrice characters fall in love and heal each other is the ultimate catnip for the readers.

I know that some of the reviews for this book must be turning MM readers off because of how dark and gritty it sounds, but honestly the 'dark' moments are wonderfully and exquisitely balanced with tender and humorous scenes. As eye popping and hard-to-look-past as the violent (and hot, did I mention hot) sex scenes are, I found that the gentle, loving care that took place afterwards had the same, if not more, of an impact on me. It was there you could see this bond of mutual need wasn't just some faux-DS relationship, there were genuine feelings and the need was genuine. Of course there were times when Rase's need to be hurt was quite frightening at times, and almost fanatic. It certainly lent a certain edge of desperation and darkness to the novel, but it isn't anything to make you tuck your tail in and scram.

In regards to other elements, I really did enjoy most of the secondary characters. I mean, there was still the typical annoying female bitch antagonist who seems to be a recurring figure in MM Romance novels nowadays, however, let's face it, the plastic trophy wife is a stereotype I will always love to hate. The stereotypical bitch wife was wonderfully balanced by the ex-wife who certainly made me love the novel more (I know my goodreads friends and I have all bitched at one time or another about the female roles in MM Romance) and his assistant and son were utter gems. Gems I tell you.

Some niggles (because I have to pretend I actually cared about them to seem like a reliable reviewer):

-After the novel, I still feel that Gabriel was a bit of a mystery character. I know that loose ends were tied up why he was fired but I felt that certain things needed to be expanded on and developed. I wanted to see his interaction with other people for one, and maybe a bit more fleshing on the lawyer side and just his life in general

-Beginning didn't draw me in, felt slightly cold and bland. However I suppose it really isn't a niggle, I just wish I had a better first impression of the characters and story

- I had a few errors in my copy


Overall Uneven is a fantastic experience and read with a strong impact that skilfully manipulates your heart and - I really can't resist saying this- your loins.


Rating: less than 4.5

[SheReadsALot · Rating 4 out of 5]

So...like yeah...um...I liked it. A LOT. I feel naughty for liking it but I'm afraid Gabriel might beat me or make me scream if I say otherwise. Whatever your preconceptions are before reading this book, it will change afterwards. There's some dark shit 'goings on' in here!



Everything definitely isn't like it seems, what seemed like rough play turns out to have deeper meaning and I like Anah Crow's tone in her stories.

I don't smoke but I feel like I need a cigarette now.

[Natasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Plot: 2
Grammar: 2
Romance: 2
Sex: 10000
Cover which looks like a cover for a 1940s who-dun-it noir flick: 2
Rase's ability to be the whore here: 5
My sick mind when Takis was around: -20
Gabriel's belt: 5
Rase's belt: 10

Overall: 10/10

I like the BDSM aspect without the BDSM culture, ya know? I like that, simply, Rase wants to get the shit beat out of him and Gabriel wants to beat the shit outta him.
Simple. Organic. Awesome.

Would recommend.

[Erth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rase is a man who has been hiding all his life. 5 years after his controlling father dies, he has an odd encounter with a man which changes everything. Rase finds the courage to leave his cold marriage and come out to his son. But now the man he met, Gabriel, has disappeared and Rase wants to find him.

Uneven is a well written story, and so many of these aren't. It's also really physically violent, with lots of whipping and bruising and real pain (he kept tasting blood, and his face was battered the next day) These 2 are not playing nice, and quite a bit of it made me wince. Rase seemed to really get off on the pain, and then the comfort afterwards. But it's passionate and also internally coherent. I liked the characters, Rase and Gabriel, and they made sense, to themselves and to each other. I believed the relationship as it was desribed. I enjoyed it and find Anah Crow a writer to look out for.

[Nikyta · Rating 5 out of 5]

I honestly loved this book. I thought the relationship between Rase and Gabriel was kind of sweet even with how violent it was.

I loved it because it was just so fascinating seeing Rase's world get flipped upside down by Gabriel and how he starts to accept the part of himself he's been suppressing for decades. Rase suppressed his need to be hit because of his father and he made his life into something he had control over but then Gabriel does something that instantly awakens Rase's need for pain.

The two are a perfect fit. Rase loves to be given pain and even humiliated during sex and Gabriel loves to give it and just instinctually knows what Rase needs. I thought it worked rather well especially with their age difference and it was a nice switch of how usually the submissive is younger (since Rase is the submissive but also about 20 years older than Gabrial) at least from a majority of bdsm books I've read the submissive has been younger.

I liked the fact that Rase's first encounter with Gabriel started the motion of Rase getting back to himself and allowing who he is to be finally shown instead of just the carefully controlled business man he made himself into for his father. He realized what the effects of holding in his baser needs had down to not only himself but to his ex-wives and son as well and I liked how Rase made the effort to get to know his son better, even if it was after his son was already grown.

I really liked Gabriel but I wished there was more background information about him since we only get some vague things on him. He's still a mystery to me which is cool but my curiosity about him is killing me. Lol. I hope one day we get to see more of Gabriel and Rase (maybe even from Gabriel's POV?) and whether or not their relationship ever blossoms to the point that they freely give their love to each other and not just the affection they were showing one another.

Fair warning, though. This is hardcore bdsm with heavy masochism and sadism to it. Rase loves pain. He loves to get beat, slapped, punched, kicked and even whipped. And Gabriel loves to inflict that pain. Just thought I should warn anyone who isn't into this type of thing because it can definitely be classified as cruelty.

Beyond that, I heartily recommend this to people who aren't squeamish over bdsm that tends to lean towards the dark side. [image error]

[Bookwatcher · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you want to read a coherent review I think you should read Nikita's because mine is full of babbling... because I'm speechless!!!

I must start saying I had some problem to get into the story. The masochistic mind of the narrator (Rase) is so sinister!. Rase need to be hurt is scary!!! Really REALLY scary...

But please try it too! When you start to get more in his mind, in his life, and his desperate need to be loved and love you will finally understand. It's so easy when you get it!

Rase and Gabriel are two faces of the same coin! They belong to each other, and it's a AMAZING love story!

I LOVED THIS BOOK!!!!IT'S FUCKING AMAZING!!!!

5 stars and please take care, the warning about be a masochist/sadistic story is true... so if you are not comfortable with it think very well. Rase want it... to be hurt... a lot... and no one can do it better than Gabriel.

[Chelsea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Re-read - Feb 2023 - Despite the amazing sex in this book, it really is a story about Rase's self discovery and self acceptance, yet somehow Gabriel is the insecure and broken one. Rase just had such a beautiful way of communicating to Gabriel which slowly breaks away and his hard exterior. I always always wish there was a little more to this book, definitely a HFN.
February 2020 - 6 years on and there is still nothing like this book. The masochism in this book is the most beautiful and well written I have ever read, it's brutal and raw and so deliciously vulnerable. Will always be a favourite!
23rd May 2015-Even better and hotter the second time around!!!!


Review
God this book was SOOOOO HHHHHOOOOOOTTTTTTT!! Every sex scene was full off violence (not as explicit as I expected from previous reviews, the violence, not the sex, that was plenty explicit), Emotions and some amazing intense kisses.

So this book is more 'raw' than most BDSM books, they really only use a belt and their hands for inflicting pain, there are no safe words (but for some reason you trust Gabriel not to 'hurt' Rase, maybe because Rase trusts him) and no rules or 'Yes Sir's', but there is being called a whore, crawling on knees through mud and lots of slaps across the face (all of which Rase loves). I know this may sound harsh, but I found it amazing how sweet and even the relationship was between Rase and Gabriel, they worked on getting to know each other and going on a date, as well as have amazing, humiliating, violent sex. I loved how this was just their relationship, they had no 'lovers' time then went into a scene, they were always lovers who just naturally feel into their roles when it was time to have sex.

definitely a re-read

[Claudie ☾ · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really love GR sometimes. This tasty little morsel would’ve never come to my attention if it weren’t for my lovely friend, my horny fairy godmother, Jan 😈 and her very persuasive review. Things like that almost make up for all the glitches and the other fun stuff that comes with being this site’s user.

This was a little shortish, but so good. To my pleasant surprise, it wasn’t pure PWP, too, even if the porn itself seemed almost custom-made for me. 🙈 Hardcore, no-holds-barred s/m that definitely won't be for everyone, that made me think of one of my all-time favourite couples who also like to play rough — Manna Francis’s Toreth & Warrick. 💘

It wasn't perfect. I had some issues, mostly with the way this thing between Rase and Gabriel started. It was a little too quick & easy, but I guess Gabriel’s spidey senses were tingling, and he had to do something about that… The rest of the book made up for that, though. I loved the little peek inside Rase’s troubled mind. Loved the age difference, and the guys just feeling things out. Too bad it wasn’t longer, I would’ve really liked to see their relationship develop some more, now that they finally know what they’re doing. Also, a couple of chapters from Gabriel’s POV would’ve been gold; as it is, he remained just a little mysterious, which wasn’t really a bad thing.

The writing was solid, although some sneaky typos made it through editing.

All in all, I found this book very enjoyable, but I don’t think its unconventional nature will ever appeal to a wider audience. That’s their loss. 🤷‍♀️

[Irina Elena · Rating 4 out of 5]

This shit is intense.

BDSM is so awesome, man. How do I just forget, sometimes?
On both the sexual and emotional front, this novel is extremely powerful.
While I don't fully undestand why you'd want to bleed and crawl during sex (or at any time - although I do get why you'd love having power and control in the metaphorical bedroom), the way Rase feels it and the skill with which it's conveyed made me enjoy it all about as much as he did.
Rase and Gabriel are both mysterious, tortured fuckers, but this is not, contrary to what you might think, a needless angstfest, and there's a certain level of comfort to it that will melt your bones, partly because it's so rare and so precious.

The two main characters are nuanced and well-rounded, and the secondary ones are intriguing and colourful, if not as fleshed out. The writing is smooth and visual, and the pacing is pitch-perfect - neither rushed nor lifeless, but with a thread of tension running through it that won't let you stop reading.
It's just awesome, you know? It's so awesome I started blasting Get On Up as soon as I turned the last page, and I only do that when I'm in a ridiculously good mood. I've got that Cheshire cat grin on my face right now, and I'm feeling so satisfied I don't even feel the need to start another book immediately.

You definitely need to be in just the right mood for this, but it's a fucking jewel.

[Nile Princess · Rating 5 out of 5]

2/14/24 - Still yes.

12/4/23. I don't know how many times I've actually read this book (definitely more than my GoodReads count) but I still absolutely love it.

---------

Never formally wrote a review for this book, but it's one that I keep coming back to over and over again. I've read it numerous times. It is heavy BDSM, especially on the S&M. VERY pain focused, but perfectly balanced with a gentleness between the two characters and the blossoming realization of how much they care for and need each other. Due to the dark content, it disturbs me how much I love this book, but I REALLY, REALLY do. It is one of my fave BDSM books ever.

[Jenni · Rating 4 out of 5]

A thoroughly enjoyable book about a two men finding what they need for themselves and from one another.

Light on the angst, but very heavy on the BDSM, probably more so than anything I've ever read before. The story line moves along almost too fast, but it's mostly believable and it worked for me.

Highly recommended for anyone who enjoys a little LOT of kink with their man love.

[SueC · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yup, that was intense... and awesome.

Certainly not for the faint hearted but if you're happy with more than a mere 'slap and tickle' then you'll definitely enjoy this more extreme BDSM novel.

Here's what I loved about the story and the way the author worked it:

I love how the assumed roles of Dom/sub were reversed. Generally we mindlessly assume that the roles are: older/confident/professional/sadist/Dom who pairs up with a younger/working class/immature/sub who wants to be controlled blah blah blah. Well flip all that on it's head and that's what you get from Uneven. Think of a 24yo Dominant Sadist inflicting immense pain to his submissive with heavy lidded eyes and a raging hard-on. Then think of a middle aged Masochistic Submissive who longs for beatings and humiliation.

The story clearly portrays two consenting adults who are able to fulfil each other's needs. They come alive with giving/receiving pain and there is no shame in that. In fact, I think it's rather beautiful because it's what they (here's that word again) need.

Crow cleverly entwines scenes of tenderness and heartache amongst their mutual desire for extreme pain. It's because of these thoughtfully crafted scenes that I maintained a sense of relief for these characters who were finally receiving what they clearly longed for.

There's also incredibly touching tenderness and a sense of humanity. Here’s a quote that struck me:

Gabriel was laid out in the sunshine, looking remarkably like an angel who’d fallen off of a cloud and landed in Rase’s bed. His name was apt, once in a while, even if he acted like the devil himself the rest of the time.”

See? There’s no delusion. They see their circumstance for what it is and it’s hopeful and reasuring. BTW there's a lot more to this book than the BDSM and many of those aspects were intriguing, fun and heartwarming.

There are some fantastic reviews of this book and I know I haven’t done this any justice, so if you’re at all interested in more hard-core BDSM, then I urge you to read them and then this book.

[LenaRibka · Rating 4 out of 5]

3,7 stars


I feel myself not qualified enough to deserve serious consideration in the Sub/Dom topic. As well as I'm not sure I can claim Uneven as a BDSM book. I beg your pardon for my ignorance of the genre and ask you to excuse me if my mention of BDSM was an insult for those readers who know it better.

But for me is Uneven a BDSM romance. In a light form.

A very unusual couple - Rase Illion, President and GEO of Illion Industries, a middle-age natural born Sub and Gabriel Chariton, a young employee in Illion's firm in the dominant role.



They met accidentally and this meeting changed their life.

It was fun to read and sex scenes were smoking hot though not always UNDERSTANDABLE for me. To feel a LOT OFF pain and a powerful desire to be hurt to get a sexual SATISFACTION?! But it is me and my imagination of HOT SEX.
Uneven offers a lot of Sub/Dom sex with a bit of plot out of interesting family background and some emotional twists.

Overall, an enjoyable read with a nice flowing writing and the story that will keep you on the edge of your seat.


Don't worry. Our MCs will survive each other, in screaming and kicking, and hopefully will live a long and happy life in pain and passion.

Amen.

[Ula'ndi Hart · Rating 5 out of 5]

Overall book rating: 4.5
Audio Book: N/A
Book Cover: 3

So... this is one of those books you DON’T read if it’s not your kind of thing!



It’s really deliciously shocking. I don’t have any other way to describe my thoughts.

I have things I don’t like in my books. One of them, for some reason, is that the Dominant partner in the relationship doesn’t work for me when he’s younger than the submissive. I don’t like it. It’s something that emediatly makes me struggle with the read.

This was one of those books, but... it worked for me.

Seeing as Jan seemed to love this one I decided I’d stick it out for a few chapters, after I found that Gabriel seems to be a very young guy.

Ps. I don’t think he’s really as young as my first impressions where. And there are lots of little layers about Gabriel that made me overlook his age.

The relationship between Rase and Gabriel is intriguing and I loved that there was actually MORE there than just the SM side of things? There was emotional conflict and connection. Something a great deal of authors seem to leave out when writing these kinds of stories? I LOVE when they give us more than kink!

Do I understand these kind of relationships? Not really, no. I can’t see myself even remotely liking something like this in my private life, but dammit does it make good reading material!
I’m messed up like that. Deal with it.

Also a last thing. To agree with Jan on her brilliant review, the author needs a standing ovation for not shying away from what they wanted to achieve in this story. It’s brutal really. But done oh so well.

Dare I say I “enjoyed” this book? Yes. I dare. Don’t judge it’s not nice! *wink-wink*

[Jo * Smut-Dickted * · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've become kind of stingy with my 5 star ratings lately but this one deserves it. I loved it! I really felt the characters - more than I should have given the level you get to know them at. The story was interesting. I think what most attracted me was sort of the "coming out" theme. There does come a point in your life when you have to be who you are - where it is physically painful to not be true to you. I felt the author handled this unfolding exceptionally well - in all the ways that count.

However I am editing to add that this, IMHO, is PURE fantasy. As that type of fantasy this is a great book. I took it that way but I've realized not everyone may - given people's real life experience may vary as well as understanding of BDSM. As others have noted in real life the guy needed a major shrink to work through issues because it caused dysfunction. That is where it crosses into something needing therapy instead of only just kink or what have you. So if you are looking for more realistic BDSM novels this is not that book. Read it for the fantasy it is and enjoy!

[M · Rating 4 out of 5]

Holy crap, Anah Crow! What the hell was that? I feel like I've been punched in the kidneys.
This story is about a very successful businessman who struggles with what he wants and finds it unexpectedly. At its core, it's BDSM. But it's raw and visceral and freaking intense, which I prefer to the more structured BDSM stuff I've read. I'm only giving it four stars because it really wasn't long enough; there's so much potential here for character development and backstory and it's totally neglected, but I think I forgive the author. Anyway, it's not a sweet romance and there's not much plot to speak of, so avoid it if those things bug you. But if you're looking for something deliriously hot, well, this is it.

[T.J.]

DNF. I found this book to be highly offensive. There is a difference between BDSM and actual abuse. This was abuse, pure and simple.