Listen to What People Want Not What They Say: How to Make Relationships Work

by Matt Manney

“We’re all crying out for love, but we aren’t getting the kind of love we’re begging for.The key to unlocking why we have so many conflicts in our world today is to understand a person’s unique personality. There is no better place to look for those answers than the Bible. Jesus “Love one another, as I have loved you.” Jesus didn’t love each of the disciples the same way. He loved them according to their unique God-given wiring. His secret to loving and leading is what we will uncover in these pages so that you can have a fuller, richer, and healthier life of relationships.”-from Listen to What People Want Not What They SayEverybody has relationships. Often, we’re thrown into relationships we’re expected to know how to make work. But we face questions Why is my marriage failing? Why am I struggling to please my boss? Why won’t my kids listen to me? Why can’t I get on the same page with my friend? I hear one thing and come to find out later they meant something else. Was it their fault or mine?How can you learn to cultivate healthy relationships, understand the “why” behind “what” people do, and learn to clarify miscommunication in any relationship? It starts with Listening to what people want, not what they say. People in your life are wired with a unique personality—what they value, what they need, and how they express themselves. Understanding their personality is the key to making that relationship work.Discover the four personality Personalities –want appreciation, compliance, and a sense of control.Perfect Personalities—want approval, support, and safe spaces.Play Personalities—want affirmation, attention, and affection.Peace Personalities—want acceptance, respect, and calm.You can discover the power of the Apostle Paul’s words to speak, “…what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Eph. 4:29) No matter how God wired you and no matter how frustrating your relationships may be, you can learn to create beautiful, life-giving relationships around you.

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Published October 31, 2021