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Speak the Unspoken: Exploring the Unwritten Rules of North Norway
“Speak The Unspoken is interesting, surprising, and well-written. As a journalist, therapist, and student of peace and conflict transformation, Gabriela Sirbu’s personal account of establishing a life in Norway will give you a good laugh and expose issues that are easily and awkwardly recognizable for anyone who has been a stranger trying to make their way – somewhere else!
The book gives a scarce view of Norway from a well-educated Romanian and fluent speaker who has been living and working with Norwegians for nearly 20 years. She offers a broad range of observations and well-informed explanations on everyday experiences, as well as more obscure characteristics of living in this beautiful country.
Follow her or not, she doesn’t beat around the bush, providing advice and clear views on living in Norway as a foreigner, which spurs some good reflections and takes the reading experience beyond the mere pleasure of having my Norwegian passport labeled!”
MARIT AURE
Migration Scholar and Professor,
UIT The Arctic University of Norway
Life is easier, though maybe less entertaining, when you know some of the rules upon arrival.
The book gives a scarce view of Norway from a well-educated Romanian and fluent speaker who has been living and working with Norwegians for nearly 20 years. She offers a broad range of observations and well-informed explanations on everyday experiences, as well as more obscure characteristics of living in this beautiful country.
Follow her or not, she doesn’t beat around the bush, providing advice and clear views on living in Norway as a foreigner, which spurs some good reflections and takes the reading experience beyond the mere pleasure of having my Norwegian passport labeled!”
MARIT AURE
Migration Scholar and Professor,
UIT The Arctic University of Norway
Life is easier, though maybe less entertaining, when you know some of the rules upon arrival.
214 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 20, 2022
3 people are currently reading
8 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
May 11, 2025
It is not often that one finds a book that introduces Norwegian culture to immigrants and foreigners. In this aspect, I am thankful for the author and her work.
Throughout the book, one can find some hands-on and practical notes about Norwegian daily life, their lifestyle, and their way of thought, which is delivered throughout three aspects: working life, family life, and holidays. Generally, the author wrote these notes based on what she experienced, what she saw, and what she heard in conversation with Norwegians and whom she met, so it is authentic, helpful, and interesting. However, it could not help but lack thoroughness to some extent, and at some points, it is not convincing to generalize or apply to other situations. As the author reminds us, this is written from her personal experience. Then I find it helps when I reflect on my own experiences to get some new input that I agree with, or just skip some others.
Regarding the working life, I like the author's notes about the concept of time in Norway, the meeting culture, speaking up, and the role of hobbies in socializing at the workplace. For immigrants, "time passes" while for Norwegians, "time comes", which is very interesting to me. In other words, things reveal themselves with time, given that it is friendships or getting to know others, or the way one schedules their lifelong milestones. Next, Norwegians spend time listening to each other in the meeting, and it is believed that this is the way to solve problems. One's attendance in the meeting is perceived as a signal of interest and the willingness to be involved in the working group, even when one experiences a language barrier or has only too much to contribute. Also, Norwegians believe that there is a life beyond work, so it is acceptable if one has to leave the office at 4 PM to pick up their children, and work after that to meet the requirement when their children go to bed. In Norwegian working culture, it is welcome to speak up about one's problems, even when it is a personal problem, to the leader to get support. What's more, hobbies reveal about your life after work, and help you team up with like people at work or to get assigned to relevant tasks.
To family life, I found the notes on DIY lifestyle, clothing, alcohol, and being in nature more interesting and relevant, though many themes are referred to.
The Holidays part lists down some special holidays in Norway, which helps to get an overview.
Overall, this book helps get started to know Norwegian culture through hands-on and authentic experiences. Since this is the very first book in this sort of collection, I think the book should receive a huge praise, while we are looking forward to more books that dive deeper into the topic.
Throughout the book, one can find some hands-on and practical notes about Norwegian daily life, their lifestyle, and their way of thought, which is delivered throughout three aspects: working life, family life, and holidays. Generally, the author wrote these notes based on what she experienced, what she saw, and what she heard in conversation with Norwegians and whom she met, so it is authentic, helpful, and interesting. However, it could not help but lack thoroughness to some extent, and at some points, it is not convincing to generalize or apply to other situations. As the author reminds us, this is written from her personal experience. Then I find it helps when I reflect on my own experiences to get some new input that I agree with, or just skip some others.
Regarding the working life, I like the author's notes about the concept of time in Norway, the meeting culture, speaking up, and the role of hobbies in socializing at the workplace. For immigrants, "time passes" while for Norwegians, "time comes", which is very interesting to me. In other words, things reveal themselves with time, given that it is friendships or getting to know others, or the way one schedules their lifelong milestones. Next, Norwegians spend time listening to each other in the meeting, and it is believed that this is the way to solve problems. One's attendance in the meeting is perceived as a signal of interest and the willingness to be involved in the working group, even when one experiences a language barrier or has only too much to contribute. Also, Norwegians believe that there is a life beyond work, so it is acceptable if one has to leave the office at 4 PM to pick up their children, and work after that to meet the requirement when their children go to bed. In Norwegian working culture, it is welcome to speak up about one's problems, even when it is a personal problem, to the leader to get support. What's more, hobbies reveal about your life after work, and help you team up with like people at work or to get assigned to relevant tasks.
To family life, I found the notes on DIY lifestyle, clothing, alcohol, and being in nature more interesting and relevant, though many themes are referred to.
The Holidays part lists down some special holidays in Norway, which helps to get an overview.
Overall, this book helps get started to know Norwegian culture through hands-on and authentic experiences. Since this is the very first book in this sort of collection, I think the book should receive a huge praise, while we are looking forward to more books that dive deeper into the topic.
December 27, 2023
Reading this book will not provide you with a lot of information about the unwritten rules of northern norway. It does however give you a lot more information about the Author than you'll care to learn. This book could have been a short(er) series of blog posts and would only have gained from it, as that would have cut out the series of platitudes and faux-deep contemplations the Author unfortunately indulges in.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews