The Disorganized Mind: Coaching Your ADHD Brain to Take Control of Your Time, Tasks, and Talents

by Nancy A. Ratey

For the millions of adults diagnosed with ADHD The Disorganized Mind will provide expert guidance on what they can do to make the most of their lives. The inattention, time-mismanagement, procrastination, impulsivity, distractibility, and difficulty with transitions that often go hand-in-hand with ADHD can be overcome with the unique approach that Nancy Ratey brings to turning these behaviors around.

The Disorganized Mind addresses the common issues confronted by the ADHD
"Where did the time go?"
"I'll do it later, I always work better under pressure anyway."
"I'll just check my e-mail one more time before the meeting…"
"I'll pay the bills tomorrow – that will give me time to find them."

Professional ADHD coach and expert Nancy Ratey helps readers better understand why their ADHD is getting in their way and what they can do about it. Nancy Ratey understands the challenges faced by adults with ADHD from both a personal and professional perspective and is able to help anyone move forward to achieve greater success. Many individuals with ADHD live in turmoil. It doesn't have to be that way. You can make choices and imagine how things can change – this book will teach you how. By using ADHD strategies that have worked for others and will work for you, as well as learning how to organize, plan, and prioritize, you'll clear the hurdles of daily living with a confidence and success you may never before have dreamed possible.

Nancy Ratey has the proven strategies that will help anyone with ADHD get focused, stay on track, and get things done - and finally get what they want from their work and their life.

Genres: Adhd, Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Mental Health, Health, Audiobook

304 pages, Paperback

First published April 1, 2008

About the author

Nancy A. Ratey is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities on personal and professional coaching for adults with and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Having dyslexia and ADHD herself, Ms. Ratey engineered her own road to success. Ms. Ratey often collaborates with her husband, Dr. John Ratey, M.D., a world-renowned researcher and neuro-psychiatrist, and the acclaimed author of A User’s Guide to the Brain and the recently released Spark, as well as co-author of the national best seller Driven to Distraction. She lives in Wellesley, MA with her husband and two dogs

Reviews

[Marion]

I started to read this - and it was good! - but I got sidetracked, then it was due back at the library. Guess I better borrow it again and learn how to be a bit more organized...

[Lisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

If you think someone with ADHD writing about ADHD, aimed at an audience who have ADHD would be a colossal mess.

You would be right.

Ratey meanders from topic to topic such as she will spend a paragraph discussing how terrible her dyslexia and ADHD are and hurting her academic life, then OMG. SHE GOT INTO HARVARD! Another paragraph how she spent her entire life living with military precision but once she got into college, she would spend hours shuffling papers about preparing to study. So she went from 18 years of living a very organized, timed, military life to a slob in under a semester? Really?

Once you get past the meandering, unrelated chit-chat and her overuse of her clients for examples, she has some good strategy to manage your ADHD and how to make it work for you. But I couldn't get past the touchy feely attitude and the poorly organized book to get to the meat of the matter. I also found the content structured to be distracting which makes reading this tile, a book on helping those with ADHD, a joke.

[Lynne]

While having a lot of the diagnostic and anecdotal content that is not my primary interest, I found that this book did three things that I found valuable: it explained the range of habit and emotional manifestations of ADHD well (especially for someone like me who's not had a formal diagnosis), it offered some very useful coping strategies and tools, and it communicates to the spouse or co-worker why they experience what they do. I also appreciate her inclusion of a bibliography with some references to original research.

[Dan Stern · Rating 3 out of 5]

I can safely say that this book does have some helpful suggestions for compensatory strategies. However, all of these are cast through the lens of the author's "clients;" all of which are upper-middle class/top earner types who can afford an ADHD coach.

Expect to hear long-winded tales of people who have live-in nannies, lament their friends don't want to accompany them on their frequent vacations due to ADHD related outbursts, or rely to much on their personal assistant. In fact, one of the author's suggest strategies is to actually HIRE a personal assistant! Who has the funds for that?

There isn't one lick of advice tailored to everyday working folks struggling to get their symptoms under control. To get anything out of this book, you'll have to work around the descriptions of her client's success and lifestyle to find the core strategies that are offered. The author even goes on at length about her Ivy League education and her world-traveling family. That's great that the author was born into a family that offered her the luxury to pursue a secondary education for years and years, and she'd seen a good chunk of the world before that, but I didn't purchase this book to listen to the author brag.

If you grew up poor or don't make a six-figure income, the stories in this book can become infuriating as your lack of sympathy grows stronger. If you can fight past those feelings though, there are some good ideas to find

[Sally · Rating 5 out of 5]

"...Remember, [this is] a process, and the changes you seek happen not instantly, but incrementally over time, sometimes a very long time. Because ... trial and error is an inherent, and time-dependent, part of the process." p. 75

On the one hand, this is NOT what an impulsive, supernally distracted, impatient person with ADD wants to hear.

But on the other hand, quite validating that it does take great effort to manage attention quirks, and my efforts will not be in vain.

What was I saying again?

****

John Ratey's brain commentary:
time mismanagement, p. 102
procrastination, p. 130
impulsivity, p. 156
distractibility, p. 184
transitions, p. 205

time mismanagement
frontal lobe (specifically dorsolateral prefrontal cortex): executive function, including time management and working memory. In ADHD brain, underaroused.
cerebellum: time/rhythm, in ADHD, time perceived as choppy
basal ganglia: shifts from idea to idea; in ADHD brain, can get "stuck" on an idea.

procrastination
frontal lobe, or "working memory," problems can lead to insufficient RAM, or constantly erased working memory. Last minute stress and adrenaline works to up dopamine, so the frontal cortex gets "switched on."

impulsivity
in youth, decisions and responses often engage the limbic area, or emotional brain. When mature, decisions engage the frontal cortex, the rational brain. In ADHD brain, frontal cortex is slow to respond, so emotional brain gets dibs.

distractibility
frontal cortex is also supposed to block or inhibit other stimuli while otherwise concentrating. In addition, lower dopamine in the striatum, the reward and motivation area of brain means it's difficult to stay fixed on a topic. Other, newer, more rewarding distractions often win over the current, more important task.

transitions
amygdala is "intensity button" in brain. frontal cortex modulates the amygdala. In ADHD brain, amygdala is overreactive, and frontal cortex is sluggish, so feeling unprepared for transitions can cause mini panic attacks.

****

Symptoms I relate to, and what might help:

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

I listened to the audiobook version, and would have skipped much of the author's initial biographical story if I'd been reading a visual version. That information was fine, but it could've been much shorter, and she had good qualifications and experience that I trusted right away. I found her client's stories most useful--and actually comforting--because it reminded me I'm not alone in my struggle to deal with ADHD. Really liked the strategies as well. One I implemented immediately is the year-view wall calendar. It's pretty striking to see deadlines laid out so clearly. Recommend for ADHD adults--but also for parents of ADHD kids. It clearly explains that ADHD is not something that will ever go away, but something that can benefit from strategic actions.

[Jay French · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this to get insights into the thoughts of one of my loved ones with late diagnosis ADD, and what I learned was as much about me as them. One of the insights here is, not surprisingly, that dealing with the dimension of time can be difficult for those with ADHD. The author provides a number of tactics to deal with this issue, including creating a habit of planning and including some regular notification of the passage of time, like the ringing of an hourly alarm on a watch. I find that these tactics would work well for me as well, as I tend to get carried away by trivial pursuits, forget to consider travel time, and other symptoms as discussed here. Those are just examples. The book discusses quite a range of behaviors. I found the book quite useful. I listened to the audio version, and I found that the stories were quite interesting, but the organization was more for flow than for conciseness. Easy to listen, but easy to forget the points. I found myself re-listening to sections a few days later to remember examples and suggestions. For this reason, and given there are a few lists and todo sections in the book, this may be best read and not listened to.

[Heather Long · Rating 5 out of 5]

This took me a while to read, not because it wasn't interesting, but because I was trying to decide if I wanted to do the exercises or continue reading. I had checked it out from the library, but after renewing a couple times, purchased it for myself because I wanted to make notes in the book.
There is so much in here that is so relatable and genuinely good tips & ideas. Now I'm going to get a notebook and work through the exercises and make notes. This is the ADHD workbook I was looking for.

[Patrick Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Disorganized Mind
By Nancy R Ratey

- [ ] Another book about ADHD
- [ ] John Ratey’s wife, she is an ADHD coach, graduated from Harvard, diagnosed as an adult
- [ ] She worked on the practical skills and management, as an MD he worked on diagnosis and treatment
- [ ] It’s about EF
- [ ] Coaching helps you change emotional responses and achieve goals. It helps clients stay motivated
- [ ] You have to develop new habits that utilize the strengths of your ADHD that help you succeed
- [ ] It’s not all your fault, your brain is different. If it was about will power you would not have ADHD
- [ ] Coaching helps you cope with life better
- [ ] What, how, and when questions
- [ ] The client pushes the process forward. The client has to be ready and willing
- [ ] Never self diagnose ADHD
- [ ] Take notes from the physical book
- [ ] You can control your brain
- [ ] Coaching is not therapy
- [ ] You need to be committed to this change, you can change your life
- [ ] Write your mission statement
- [ ] ANSWER
- [ ] Acceptance, learn, understand
- [ ] Symptom - outcome
- [ ] Don’t self sabotage, we are masters at that
- [ ] Hold yourself accountable and have others hold you accountable, be ruthlessly honest
- [ ] Narrow your focus, don’t over commit
- [ ] All negative all the time, you can’t see the strengths

Stories:
- [ ] Procrastinating - I can relate
- [ ] I procrastinate more than I realize


Impulsivity
- [ ] Wow stories of being fired and lost relationships because of impulsive speech and actions - that’s me
- [ ] Impulsivity is an emotional response to the world instead of a rational response
- [ ] It is the lack of brakes, lack of reflection, for thought, and lack of ability to learn from mistakes

Distractibility

This book is filled with stories and practical solutions. It is acceptance, responsibility, tough love, and clear action steps. I love it

Transitions

- [ ] You can’t wish this away, but you can take charge of your life
- [ ] There are sections about how non ADHDers to deal with ADHD people, primarily through the scope of coworkers and spouses. Great sections and inclusion
- [ ] This book has moved to the top of my ADHD books, this is primarily for people with ADHD that are looking to take action. It focuses less on beginner education, instead acceptance and action, but it is accessible to all

- [ ] We with adhd struggle to keep our symptoms from controlling us. We must create structures and strategies to compensate for our symptoms. We learn from others, try new techniques, evolve, and try again - resilience
- [ ] ADHD coaching focuses on the unique biological differences in the ADHD brain, that have caused the individual to have less control over their life than they want or need to have. The coach understands this and helps the client to navigate the symptoms

Strategies for life - notes in the book
- [ ] Finance
- [ ] Bad brain days
- [ ] Chunking
- [ ] Take breaks
- [ ] Accountability


- [ ] It ends with a statement about willingness to take action, personal responsibility, and ultimately resilience. That ADHD is treatable but the person must be resilient and responsible
- [ ] This book is in line with my beliefs and approach to ADHD, I loved it. Now I hope I can follow its advice and put it into action

More notes will be in the physical copy of the book

[Beth · Rating 3 out of 5]

Would love to see this updated for the 2020s because a lot of the examples and solutions felt very dated.

[Lona]

This was not really well structured, the author overdid it a bit with client examples and examples from her own life, it's also written for ADHD folks who already have their life mostly under control with family and jobs and somehow can't manage one part of it. I know a lot of people with ADHD who didn't get so far, can't afford a coach or a household helpfor their laundry how it's suggested in the book.

Some of the tips I found helpful - I'm 32, a bit more than one week away from getting tested and I read this book because it might be nice to be prepared for getting the help I really need and having a plan laid out. Some of the tips already helped me getting though everyday life, like visual reminders and stuff like that. Most of these basic tips I found on ADHD twitter or Instagram, a really wholesome and non ableist source for help, tips and tricks to manage.

The thing is, that the book really made me feel bad about myself. "Separate yourself from your ADHD", yeah, I'd like to, but it's my brain, you know? The book contained a lot of tips how to alter your complete communication/personality and mask better, so others feel most comfortable around you. There was even a chapter about partners of people with ADHD and how it's a lot of work to push trough a relationship with them, but with a lot of patience you get through, yay. Yaaay. My favourite sentence, quoted from a child: "I understand how my parents got divorced, but not how they got married in the first place. My dad is so normal, but my mom is really crazy." I can't even, but maybe that's just crazy me.

The thing is: Yes, I think I have to adjust my impulsivity and learn to ramble less. And when/if my ADHD will get confirmed I will not "play the ADHD/disability card" (also from the book), I want help because living with this constant chaos in my head is damn exhausting, scary and I also want to do better and get the energy to contribute more, sure. But this book just made me feel shittier about all of it, I am already damn careful not to be "like this". And masking all the time is so exhausting, so I am glad that I have loved ones around me who forgive me if I ramble a bit and if I zone out or if I did my chores not 100% in time or if I forgot something. I am thankful for their patience, because they know I try to work around this. But I don't get the point of writing a book for people with ADHD and then put a chapter like this in it, which is literally saying: Here are the poor people who are close to these walking catastrophes, they do a great job of pushing trough these relationships, even if they are almost unbearable and they "did not sign up for this". I felt like the book forget that there are toxic and nontoxic people and ADHD does not necessaarily mean toxic in itself. There are so many great people with ADHD I know who are nontoxic but careful and overapologetic af, even when they don't need to be. And I am a bit sick of the approach that ADHD is always defined through annoying and unbearable it is to the people around the ADHD folks because that ignores all these awesome people who really try hard and aren't seen as a burden, but as a human being with a struggle, to begin with.

And no, I am not saying that the partners and friends of ADHD folks don't have to deal with stuff, I talked with my own partner about this, we are together for 15 years now and witnessed a lot of struggle and also helped me a lot. I am thankful and I am aware that it was sometimes a ride for him too, especially in my depressive phases. I constantly check up on him about this, because I know stuff like this afford the loved ones to be cared about too. But this can absolutely be worded much better and the chapter was just not, it was just really reaproachful, full of ableism and it is why I would not recommend this one. If you need a self help book, choose one that does not make you feel even more sorry for having ADHD.

[Lisa · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read this book hoping it might be of some help for my adult son who was diagnosed with ADD as a child and is still having challenges. I can't imagine him being able to focus long enough to follow what this book is trying to say with all the meandering. I even had a hard time explaining to him what I read while watching his eyes glaze over in the middle of it.

There might be some helpful tips here but overall Ratey's system seems a bit daunting, even for me and I don't have ADHD.

What turned me off this book was the fact that Ratey got into Harvard and graduated before she was diagnosed with ADHD. All of her clients she described in the book have graduated from college and have or had successful careers although they're experiencing difficulties and frustration with their ADHD. Yet my son barely made it through high school and graduated only because I had to constantly help him and keep in contact with all his teachers on a nearly daily basis. Now he's struggling with community college courses. Hold down a job? Yeah, I keep hoping that will happen some day.

[Jo · Rating 1 out of 5]

While there are many good strategies and ideas presented, often times it seemed the solutions offered were to hire someone else to do something you had trouble with. Not everyone can afford this, which is why we bought the book instead of hiring a coach.

I found Part I and Part III the most helpful.

[Chris Robison · Rating 3 out of 5]

Useful if this is your first ADHD or coaching book. I found the stories and examples validating. Interesting to read but overall I think there are better books in this area.

[Dan Burt · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

[Theresa · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have joked for years that I have ADHD (self-diagnosed of course), but those who know me might find it hard to disagree. And now that I've read Ratey's description of the ADHD adult, I'm convinced.

I didn't really think about the fact that instant gratification and irritation could be symptoms of ADHD. For me, it was always procrastination and a serious lack of focus. The fact that I have so many tabs open in my browser (and the browser in my head), the inability to finish a story or a sentence because my mind had moved on to something else, and world-class procrastination was all the evidence I needed to self-diagnose.

Ratey has been actually diagnosed with ADHD and works as a coach for those that have also been diagnosed. They are executives and professionals who seek her help to work with their ADHD rather than be ruled by it.

Her process is helpful for those with ADHD and those who just have too much to do and too much stimulation in this tech soaked world. She proposes ANSWER (Acknowledge, Narrow (focus), Strategy, Evaluate and Repeat). This evaluation and self-awareness will help me get more done, I'm sure. What I'm not sure of is if it will make my stories make more sense....

[Chahd Chabib · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book is more suitable towards parents who have children with ADHD, or those who want to be ADHD coaches. If you don't belong to any of these categories, skip reading this.The strategies stated in the book aren't enlightening. And there is too much repetition.The same idea is repeated over and over again, a chapter after another. It seems to me that Nancy wrote this book mainly to promote herself as an ADHD coach rather than to really help the readers who are suffering from the condition.

[Micah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yeah, it's rambly and has those self-help-y vibes on how to be a Better Capitalist Worker, but there's a lot of good stuff, and the anecdotal presentation of strategies worked well for me. If you're too all-over-the-place to read the whole thing there's a decent short summary at the end of the part II chapters that can streamline things.

[Carling · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not amazing but, I found it helpful for me to view things in my life differently and with more acceptance while also taking responsibility for all of my behaviors. I found some of the suggestions to be worth trying.

[L.A. Jacob · Rating 2 out of 5]

Started to work through the questions but they got me depressed so I don't think this book is for me.

[Mike · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you have ADHD symptoms every part of this book will help. It is a stellar example of how a person with challenges can use those challenges to be a success.

[Letitia Violet · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked this one. Yes, she has lived a privileged life and yes, so has her clients. But we are all just humans, I do not have the resources or the success of her clients. But their struggles helped illustrate the concept. Some people complained about not understanding how she got into Harvard and then suddenly started struggling. She explained in the book that her father was militant and always on her and her siblings to be more reliable. He would tap the desk when she was studying and would make her and her siblings do timed practice runs of their morning routines if they ran late. I didn't find the chapters about communicating with the people around you to be ableist. Her story examples included people who were struggling with this like all of the other struggles. When you are struggling with relationships, often there are strong emotions tied to that. I felt like it continued the concepts of internal and external accountability to achieve your goals. Writing things down to communicate more effectively and scheduling times to communicate with your partner and children about planning and any issues are not bad things.

[rona · Rating 4 out of 5]

i felt seen and understood reading this book in regards to my adhd. there are now a lot of sticky notes within the book, so i could go back and review the important tools and tips i thought were important along with a google doc i created.
i didnt realize the book was a workbook as well so it took a bit of effort to finish reading.

as a common 20 something year old single student with no family and working a part time job, it was strange connecting with the author’s clients who were older, richer, high-positioned executives adhd peers with families and personal assistants. but we shared the same difficulties of adhd! the time mismanagement, forgetfulness, shame, and ambition to overcome adhd. i found my common ground with that.

if you want to handle your adhd, youre gonna have to work for it and i did so with this book and i hope i can use A-N-S-W-E-R in my life and find success.

[Cara · Rating 4 out of 5]

A useful and engaging book for anyone who has (or knows someone) with ADHD. The book is full of graceful encouragement for people who have asked themselves, "Why do I always do this!" or have faced frustrations or regrets due to struggles from their ADHD. Ratey explains things in a way that enables the reader to separate themselves from their ADHD while also providing a structured approach (the ANSWER) for tackling the difficulties that can arise from their ADHD. Numerous case studies and examples are given from start to finish, illustrating the difficulties that led people to coaching, the underlying symptoms leading to the difficulties and the strategies that Ratey's clients used to overcome them.

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book with some solid tips for dealing with common problems that come with living with adult ADHD, though at times it becomes repetitive a d a bit tedious to read, this one was good, but I feel could have been better with additional editing and less specific talk about "coaching" as the best option. The author genuinely makes a good argument for it's usefulness, but I suspect a lot of people will be resistant to admitting flaws and weaknesses in professional and familial settings to the extent of being willing to hire someone to help them stay accountable in changing habits and behaviors that they already struggle with. 3 stars.

[Ben · Rating 4 out of 5]

Control

Ratey's strategies for taking control of your time, tasks, and talents are both practical and effective.

I found this book incredibly helpful. It's full of valuable insights and practical tips that can be implemented immediately.

I especially appreciated the way Ratey emphasizes the importance of embracing your strengths and finding strategies that work for you, rather than trying to fit into someone else's mold.

If you or someone you know struggles with ADHD, this book is an absolute must-read.

Don't wait another day to take control of your life and reach your full potential.

4.2/5

[Mary · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was intrigued by this book because I wanted to see if it would be something that I could recommend to my therapy clients. And alas, it is not. This book feels more like Ratey was trying to write her memoir and frankly, she comes across as pompous and self-serving. The first part of the book is about coaching (specifically, her coaching) and tries to sell you on that. Then she moves to client examples and ends with strategies that are mired in privilege and her own preferred methods. The best parts of this book are the brief sections written by her husband, John Ratey, because he actually explains ADHD. Also, there was so much name dropping with Harvard, it started to annoy me.

[Jake Crenshaw · Rating 5 out of 5]

The A.N.S.W.E.R. is beautifully thread through the whole book! The author, herself writing from an ADHD perspective to the ADHD audience is masterfully delivered. Refreshingly not written like the typical nero-typical brain would write. Is it a little scattered? Is she open and vulnerable? Yes and yes. I found a great level of connection with the author as she shared her authentic experience and solution or 'answer' to her ADHD and it would appear that she is spot on, all the way through! Excellent read whether ADHDer or not.

[Alyssa · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5⭐️ This is not Christian coaching for ADHD, so read with discernment Christians. But I do think she does focus on the science of how the ADHD brain works and practical tips that can help in our lives. With ADHD, yes you do need to accommodate at times and areas of our lives, and things will look different for everyone. I like that she continually reminds that not one specific “way” will work for everyone, you will need to take time to do some trial and error to find ways that can help reduce unwanted symptoms of ADHD.

[Jordan Bickimer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fantastic resource for anyone with ADHD or similar symptoms. The book is packed with practical advice and tools to help you assess your needs and take action to meet them. Within a few days of starting this book I was able to make adjustments in my life and begin gathering feedback as to whether those adjustments work. This book really is a gem of wisdom, and a powerful tool with those with the drive and dedication to coach themselves into better behavior. I can't recommend it enough.